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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 28 Jun 13 - 11:35 AM
Amos 28 Jun 13 - 10:07 AM
Rapparee 28 Jun 13 - 12:45 AM
Rapparee 28 Jun 13 - 12:44 AM
Little Hawk 27 Jun 13 - 10:21 PM
GUEST,The Galactic Overlord 27 Jun 13 - 09:39 PM
Rapparee 27 Jun 13 - 06:22 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jun 13 - 12:22 PM
Rapparee 27 Jun 13 - 12:09 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jun 13 - 11:53 AM
Rapparee 27 Jun 13 - 10:50 AM
Acme 27 Jun 13 - 09:56 AM
Acme 27 Jun 13 - 09:55 AM
Rapparee 26 Jun 13 - 10:37 PM
Little Hawk 26 Jun 13 - 10:24 PM
gnu 26 Jun 13 - 08:50 PM
Rapparee 26 Jun 13 - 07:28 PM
Amos 26 Jun 13 - 06:06 PM
Acme 26 Jun 13 - 02:46 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 26 Jun 13 - 12:01 PM
Acme 26 Jun 13 - 11:54 AM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 26 Jun 13 - 11:39 AM
Rapparee 26 Jun 13 - 11:12 AM
gnu 26 Jun 13 - 05:28 AM
gnu 26 Jun 13 - 05:28 AM
Rapparee 25 Jun 13 - 09:49 PM
Little Hawk 25 Jun 13 - 09:46 PM
Rapparee 25 Jun 13 - 09:18 PM
Amos 25 Jun 13 - 06:49 PM
Rapparee 25 Jun 13 - 11:01 AM
Amos 25 Jun 13 - 01:05 AM
Little Hawk 24 Jun 13 - 11:23 PM
Rapparee 24 Jun 13 - 11:14 PM
Rapparee 24 Jun 13 - 08:14 PM
Acme 24 Jun 13 - 03:59 PM
gnu 24 Jun 13 - 07:10 AM
Amos 24 Jun 13 - 02:03 AM
Rapparee 23 Jun 13 - 11:55 PM
Rapparee 23 Jun 13 - 07:12 PM
Amos 23 Jun 13 - 05:43 PM
Amos 23 Jun 13 - 01:57 PM
Amos 23 Jun 13 - 01:48 PM
Acme 23 Jun 13 - 12:27 PM
Amos 23 Jun 13 - 11:42 AM
gnu 23 Jun 13 - 10:53 AM
gnu 23 Jun 13 - 05:30 AM
Little Hawk 23 Jun 13 - 01:33 AM
Little Hawk 23 Jun 13 - 12:31 AM
Amos 23 Jun 13 - 12:26 AM
Rapparee 22 Jun 13 - 11:59 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jun 13 - 11:35 AM

If you are what you eat, I guess I'm rolled oats.

And other things.

I'm in ABQ. Got run outa the World Championships of Cowboy Action Shooting just because I wanted to shoot like the cowboys did. Sheesh, what's wrong with galloping full tilt, naked, down the street shooting out lights and store windows? I'll fix 'em, though -- next year I'll do it while I ride a horse. Party poopers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jun 13 - 10:07 AM

If it were not for élan vital, you WOULD be rolled dice. We're really fortunate that entropy is not all it's cracked up to be!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jun 13 - 12:45 AM

Correction: not "I'm rolled" but "I've rolled."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jun 13 - 12:44 AM

I dunno if the GO will be willing to answer, but I'm rolled dice.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 10:21 PM

I have a question for you, O Galactic Overlord.

Can a square head roll?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,The Galactic Overlord
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 09:39 PM

You lot are still around? Heads will roll in the Guards for this!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 06:22 PM

Could he drink Canada dry?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 12:22 PM

It would be more humane to just give him a FREE truckload of beer for a limited period of time...say 6 hours...and let him drink himself to death.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 12:09 PM

No, pestiCIDES. And, given his mental state, herbicides.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 11:53 AM

You're thinking in terms of "pest control", eh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 10:50 AM

Will this also work on Sham McBride?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 09:56 AM

It usually takes three applications (spaced 3 days apart) to knock out mites. Also good for aphids. You don't need to keep spraying after three times if they die off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Jun 13 - 09:55 AM

Don't do it too often. Maybe every couple of weeks? If you see spider mites appear (they come along when plants are ailing) then you can alternate with a foliar spray. How big is your garden? Is a gallon of anything too much to mix? A gallon of water with a couple of ounces of compost tea (look it up), a couple of tablespoons (about 1 ounce) of orange oil (the strong stuff, that costs about $20 a pint). Put it in a backpack sprayer or a little of it in a spray bottle and spritz your tomatoes (and anything else that gets red mites) every three days.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 10:37 PM

Use any standard US pepper spray for hemorrhoids. 2.0 to 5.3 million Scoville units per squirt. This really works, for reasons I shan't go into except to say that no, I was in no way personally involved in the experiment.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 10:24 PM

I'm not sure about that, but don't EVER put it on hemmorhoids.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 08:50 PM

I am simply duped stupid. It's perfectly not dupifying. It's entirely logical.

Let me explain... I transplated my Scarlett Runner beans today. NOW do yue get it?

BTW, SRS... how often should I spray my maters with HP sauce?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 07:28 PM

And did the duper have powers beyond the ken of mortal man? A Super Duper? Did the person duped have a relationship with Betty? Did Betty tell Dupee to buy her a diamond ring? Did Dupee tell Betty, "Buy you most anything?" Was Dupee duped by the Super Duper with a fake diamond?   Is that way Dupee robbed a jewelry store?

Enquiring minds wish to know!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 06:06 PM

The question is who was duped, and by whom? Who the Duper and who the Dupee?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 02:46 PM

Mods remove duplicate posts. Gnu managed to post the same thing twice. The rest is just embellishment.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 12:01 PM

Thanks, Stilly, for just sayin' the most cryptic and incomprehensible sentence I've heard all week.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 11:54 AM

Dupes are often removed, but MOM's total is so august that this June it will be left in place.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 11:39 AM

A good, solid kick in the ass oughta do it.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 11:12 AM

gnu's stuck again. Give him a good whack to unstick him.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 05:28 AM

Odds Bodkins'!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jun 13 - 05:28 AM

Odds Bodkins'!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jun 13 - 09:49 PM

Perhaps they're ah'ed. As in, "I know Amos!" "Ah!" Or perhaps ah-ha'ed. Or does the conversation go like this: "I know Amos." "Odd."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Jun 13 - 09:46 PM

LOL!

Hey, Rap? I'm already telling people I know him. And they're awed. Or are they odd? Well, something like that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jun 13 - 09:18 PM

When you are buried in the Poets' Corner of Westminster Abbey after winning the Nobel Prize, can I say that I knew you when you were a simple, struggling, starving artist?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jun 13 - 06:49 PM

On this date in history:

Beyond the Cascade first became available to the great American reading public on the BARNES & NOBLE on-line store. This makes it available in Nook format as well.

This is far more important, in the long term, than Custer's foolishness.

A
First Vowel


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jun 13 - 11:01 AM

Today is the anniversary of Custer's Big Mistake.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jun 13 - 01:05 AM

Still:

It's complete. I was waiting to hear from RR before I try to email it, or maybe DropBox it to her.

It's LONG--1500 pages. About 5.6 megs.

But you haven't answered my question about how you get a collection of posts from different threads to appear in printer-friendly mode.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Jun 13 - 11:23 PM

Huh????? (I haven't watched any of that stuff in, oh, about 20 years or more.) Did they score a home run in the hockey net?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jun 13 - 11:14 PM

The Chicago Cubs just won the Stanley Cup!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jun 13 - 08:14 PM

All humane things are subject to decay,
And, when Fate summons, Monarchs must obey:
This Rapparee found, who, like Augustus, young
Was call'd to Empire, and had govern'd long:
In Prose and Verse, was own'd, without dispute
Through all the Realms of BS, absolute.
This aged Prince now flourishing in Peace,
And blest with issue of a large increase,
Worn out with business, did at length debate
To settle the succession of the State:
And pond'ring which of all Mom's kids was fit
To Reign, and wage immortal War with Wit;
Cry'd, 'tis resolv'd; for Nature pleads that s/he
Should only rule, who most resembles me:
Am?? alone my perfect image bears,
Mature in dullness from his tender years.
Am?? alone, of all my Sibs, is he
Who stands confirm'd in full stupidity.
The rest to some faint meaning make pretence,
But Am?? never deviates into sense.
Some Beams of Wit on other souls may fall,
Strike through and make a lucid interval;
But Am??'s genuine night admits no ray,
His rising Fogs prevail upon the Day.
And so with MOAB's blessings grave,
She did anoint Am-- her new fave.

       --Brian Mac Giolla Meidhre, Séamus an chaca a chaill Éire, Daingean Uí Chúis,Contae Chiarraí: Ballyfungus Press, 1604.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jun 13 - 03:59 PM

I like that poem, Amos, thanks for retrieving it from the depths of the thread. How has your PDF come along, or shall I give it a go and print it out? How many pages are you coming up with?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 24 Jun 13 - 07:10 AM

A...

This content is currently unavailable.

The page you requested cannot be displayed right now. It may be temporarily unavailable, the link you clicked on may have expired, or you may not have permission to view this page.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jun 13 - 02:03 AM

Poor man he rolls in his ego all night
RIch man he does the same
Rapparee wraps his around him so tight
But it's ego, just the same.

Poor man pumps with a bicycle pump
Rich man he does the same
Rapp pumps his up with pure-dee BS,
But he's pumping, just the same!

Poor man he uses his art to escape
Rich man he does the same!
Rapp uses art to fatten his farts
But its art, sir, just the same!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 11:55 PM

Gracious me. Apparently the quality of the BS has become strained and no loner .like the gentle dew from a Bovine Heaven Alas and alack, the it should come to this! Where is the Weiseley, the Still Water Sage, aall the gnus that fit we print? Ou sont les Amos d'antan? I cannot, alone, fill the gap. Perhaps if I break into song:

Where or where can the Moabite be
Oh where oh where can they be?
With their hair some gone and with some cut long
Oh where, oh where can they be?

Last night as I lay on the prairie
Awatchin' the glitterin' stars
I thought of the good things we treasure
Like not being locked behind bars.

Good friends who'd swing for you in an instant
For greater love no man hath
To climb up there on the gallows
Guiltless but needing a bath.

Be it Amos or gnu or Stilly
They'd all give their lives to save me
For Mom has a child who's a favorite
And theat favorite child is me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 07:12 PM

Hi, Mom!

Your fave is in Moriarty, New Mexico and has just returned from Founders' Ranch over in Edgewood. I think the GPS took me on every unpaved -- and I mean DIRT! -- road in this part of the State to get there. I mean, Mom, West Vidalia Road is a track over rocks, and I drew the line when The Machine told me to "Turn left on Firebreak Road" because that was, well, a firebreak and "paved" with boulders as large as the wheels of the car.

So I drove around some and finally, by going West, hit upon the North-South road Founders' Ranch is located off of. (Hot damn! I think I just ended a sentence with a double preposition!)

Anyway, I met some nice folks -- including Captain Baylor (see his website) -- and a couple from Oz, and she was named Dorothy, really, and no, I didn't make any jokes about it.

See, Mom, my wife told me to go to EoT while she was in France and so I obeyed, just like I always do.

Anyway, the vendors were just starting to set up and nothing much was going on today except for the socializing, which was pretty nice. Tomorrow is when the shootin' starts -- literally. Anyway, Mom, that's where I am and why I'm here in the New Mexico desert wilderness.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 05:43 PM

HEre's a pleasant collision of what have always been two separate worlds, for me, the writing and the musical. This was posted by the gent who manages the open Mic I go to on Saturdays.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 01:57 PM

In respect of Rustric's tragic disintegration of domicile, I offer this repeat of a poem she liked back in May 2006:

Oh Rustical Rebel, O, Rebel my dear,
Your wit is so deep, and your eyes are so clear,
Your arms and your fingers are pure, I confess,
But the mind also lingers upon all the rest.
So random and wild are the spins we are in,
When you drift amongst us, your MOABITE kin,
That the end can't be figgered
From where it begins,
In the shadowy tendrils of bullshit.

Oh, BW, BW, BWL,
Whose humor and insight goes too far to tell,
From the Florida sky to his downy deep vale,
Where his clay pots lie patiently drying their tails,
So wicked the flashing of lightning like wit,
As he toils in the earth,
and the storm, and the pit,
Midst the shadowy tendrils of bullshit!

Rapaire in the Northland, where the egos grow tall,
Where space is wide open, and nothing looks small,
Where a man is as big as the blue sky he smells,
And as sturdy and tall as the bullshit he tells,
He's winsome and lithe,
And much more than alive,
In the flowering tendrils
of bullshit!

And Steady-On Stilly, of well-lettered zest,
Transplanted to Texas from the wooly Northwest,
With marvelous treasure hidden deep in her mind,
Which leave all her fellows at MOAB stone blind
So clear and unscarred,
With her dogs, in her yard,
Midst the delicate tendrils of bullshit!

There's dozens of others whose names I could name
Who have conquered the MOAB, who well deserve fame
But I don't have forever, and they know who they are,
Each fellow a poet, and each lass a star
As we follow this spiralling back-slapping trail,
Where no-one can falter, and no-one can fail
Midst the perilous tendrils of bullshit!

Agonistes Perihelion III,
Advocate-General of the Public Weal
Peon Paeans and Those Who Write Them
Byronme and Pisceonyu,
Long Beach, California, 1897


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 01:48 PM

The file itself, containing all of RR's posts, is not impossibly large: 5.9 meg. It's long,t hough! Over 1500 pages, the bulk of which are redundant displays of Mudcat boilerplate.

However, I don't see how to get a user's list of posts to list the URLs so they produce printer friendly versions. Seems to me you have to manually display the page and then choose the printer-friendly version of the thread. This would mean manually cutting and pasting each of her posts, which is prohibitive.


As to what you can do with the existing file, you can search it copy the text if you wish or read it end to end.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 12:27 PM

Amos, that file will be so large you can't DO anything with it. And Printer friendly is done in a short time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 11:42 AM

Why must we? I don't go, as a rule. I was out in a nearby park gallivanting with Maggie the Magnificent Rocket Dog.

Played at an open mic yesterday, which was a lot of fun--saw some old friends and got some tunes sung. I love laying out songs. I know it may sound frivolous but I love doing it. It is what keeps me coming back here--a flock of Wild Kindreds who understand that strange delight in singing out a good song.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 10:53 AM

All a yees must be at church.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 05:30 AM

LH... hold right shift and press control. This often happens to me when I am typing in French. É or ? Easy peasy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 01:33 AM

????

'''''

Hmm. It's okay now. Probably because I went off into another program for awhile and then came back here. It has something to do with some key that I either hit...or press down for too long on the left side of the keyboard.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 12:31 AM

Shit. Iève done something thatès causing some weird code to fuck up certain keys on the keyboard and I doèt now how to turn it off.

An Apostrophe now looks like é.

A question mark now looks like É.

This happens occasionally, I donèt know why, and is it ever a drag!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 13 - 12:26 AM

Geweze, I wish I'd thought of Printer Friendly before I started the process. It is still churning, but up to 2003, with the end in 2002. So it'll be done toinight.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 13 - 11:59 PM

Chimps are not welcome there because they tear off people's faces. LH would be, maybe even Sham (I'm going to call him that now, because that's what he is), but no monkeys unless accompanied by an organ grinder who owns them.


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