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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 13 Aug 12 - 10:23 AM
Rapparee 13 Aug 12 - 10:04 AM
Amos 13 Aug 12 - 09:50 AM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 13 Aug 12 - 09:16 AM
Acme 13 Aug 12 - 01:14 AM
Rapparee 13 Aug 12 - 12:22 AM
Amos 12 Aug 12 - 11:29 PM
Rapparee 12 Aug 12 - 10:20 PM
Amos 12 Aug 12 - 10:02 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 12 Aug 12 - 09:24 PM
Rapparee 12 Aug 12 - 08:51 PM
Amos 12 Aug 12 - 02:58 PM
gnu 12 Aug 12 - 02:53 PM
Rapparee 12 Aug 12 - 10:11 AM
Rapparee 11 Aug 12 - 11:18 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 11 Aug 12 - 10:56 PM
Rapparee 11 Aug 12 - 03:01 PM
Amos 11 Aug 12 - 12:50 PM
Rapparee 11 Aug 12 - 09:22 AM
gnu 10 Aug 12 - 10:12 PM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 10:06 PM
gnu 10 Aug 12 - 08:45 PM
gnu 10 Aug 12 - 08:37 PM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 08:14 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 10 Aug 12 - 07:40 PM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 07:36 PM
gnu 10 Aug 12 - 07:34 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 10 Aug 12 - 07:17 PM
gnu 10 Aug 12 - 06:52 PM
gnu 10 Aug 12 - 06:39 PM
Amos 10 Aug 12 - 04:44 PM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 02:27 PM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 02:26 PM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 02:25 PM
Amos 10 Aug 12 - 11:47 AM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 10:16 AM
Rapparee 10 Aug 12 - 10:02 AM
Amos 10 Aug 12 - 09:20 AM
Acme 10 Aug 12 - 02:38 AM
Amos 10 Aug 12 - 01:31 AM
Rapparee 09 Aug 12 - 09:47 PM
Rapparee 09 Aug 12 - 08:59 PM
Amos 09 Aug 12 - 06:53 PM
Amos 09 Aug 12 - 12:39 PM
Amos 09 Aug 12 - 10:59 AM
GUEST,Obergeneralfeldmarschall Katrine von und zu 09 Aug 12 - 10:19 AM
Acme 09 Aug 12 - 01:38 AM
Rapparee 08 Aug 12 - 08:48 PM
Amos 08 Aug 12 - 06:58 PM
Rapparee 08 Aug 12 - 05:54 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 12 - 10:23 AM

Well, yes, I did. But that does not excuse your sloppiness in misappropriating the third person singular. It's just careless--like thinking that Juliet on her balcony is asking Romeo where he is. Silly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Aug 12 - 10:04 AM

Did you know that the letter "Y", as in "Ye Olde Shoppe", was a stand-in for the letters "TH"? You can find an excellent example of this this usage on Shakespeare's epitaph. "You" was originally "Thou".

I knew Stilly was back because, except for a perpetual cloud of Stygian gloom over Blind River, Ontario, the world became brighter.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 12 - 09:50 AM

Well, speak for yourself, you rowdy guttersnipe figment! I sure noticed.

Rapp, your amendments to the grammar made no improvement, sir.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 13 Aug 12 - 09:16 AM

We never flippin' noticed you was gone...

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Aug 12 - 01:14 AM

I'm back!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Aug 12 - 12:22 AM

1601, actually. Author unknown, modified to fit the circumstances.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 11:29 PM

Excuse me? Sir? Um, the Elizabethan ending "-eth" is, um, third person singular, not second person mandate. You meant to say "Piss me off not!", I'm sure. Grammar is important, you know.

Anyway, this is old material from before the Civil War, in any case, and dusty, hoary with inadequacies and the tremulo of geriatric uncertainty.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 10:20 PM

Shame, I can only tell you that what I have for you shall be hunger, thirst, weeping, wailing, gnashing of teeth, swords double edged, spirits created for revengement, serpents, worms, scorpions, hammers, wormwood, water of gall, the spirit of tempest, and other things of like sort. Whereby are signified unto you the multitude and dreadful terror of the most horrible torments and pains. There shall be likewise darkness inward and outward, both of body and soul. There shall be fire also, not as this fire here, that tormenteth a little, and shortly endeth, but such a fire as I requireth, which torments exceedingly, and shall never make an end of that tormenting.

Pisseth me off not.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 10:02 PM

Nah, no worries. I've already done millennia of time much harder than that. 'S nothin' all that new or scary. He's jes' puffin' himself up and taking credit for the whole Wheel as though he had anything to do widdit. No worries.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 09:24 PM

Holy FLIP!!! That is scary stuff, Rap. You are either right nuts or yer some kind of holy monster. I am glad I am not Amos cos I'd be livin' in terror of yer wrath!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 08:51 PM

Excuse me, Amos, but you forget that if I stop thinking about you you will cease to exist. Should I redo that eensy-teensy-weensy part of my mind devoted to your continued existence you would blip out and no memory of your existence would exist. But I am merciful and have not wrath in me, and being all-forgiving you may assume your continued existence -- unless of course you really, really piss me off. It is then that you would feel my wrath (for while I have not wrath in me I am also All-Wrathful) and you might, for a few moments, find it unpleasant.

For it is everlasting wrath. It would be dreadful to suffer my fierceness and wrath one moment; but you will suffer it to all eternity. There will be no end to this exquisite horrible misery. When you look forward, you shall see a long for ever, a boundless duration before you, which will swallow up your thoughts, and amaze your soul; and you will absolutely despair of ever having any deliverance, any end, any mitigation, any rest at all. You will know certainly that you must wear out long ages, millions of millions of ages, in wrestling and conflicting with this almighty merciless vengeance; and then when you have so done, when so many ages have actually been spent by you in this manner, you will know that all is but a point to what remains. So that your punishment will indeed be infinite. Oh, who can express what the state of a soul in such circumstances is! All that I can possibly say about it, gives but a very feeble, faint representation of it; it is inexpressible and inconceivable to you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 02:58 PM

He's a regular at the Black Eagle. A Gay Bar in Toronto.

ANd yes, Rapparree, you are far more harsh on him than reason could dictate. When you ignore the real villainy of the world and exert such energies in combatting delusory figments, one can only assume you have long since reached the point at which the world was too much with you, and surrendered your Articles of Inhabitation thereunto. A sorry thing, for a man once in full, to be left combating moonbeams, but it could be much worse. He could have become a Republican.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 02:53 PM

"457 Church Street in Toronto."???

Research, I assume?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Aug 12 - 10:11 AM

I've been far too hard on Shame and I apologize. Several people have told me that Shame isn't "as bad as all that" and that his personal cleanliness doesn't "leave a lot to be desired." Since these are people who seem to know him quite well, I'll take their words for it. I'm also told that, attracted by the bright lights and big city life, he moved from Blind River quite some time ago and, should you wish to meet him, can often be found at 457 Church Street in Toronto.

So, Shame, you're not as bad as I assumed you were, nor are you as stupid as I once thought. Shame, my opinion of you can't get any higher!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Aug 12 - 11:18 PM

Know anyone else in that list, Shame? You probably should -- some are from Greater Sudbury. Blind River must be considered part of Sudbury, after all.

Odd that YOUR name isn't on that list, isn't it? Oh, wait -- there's a list of Canadian drunks and perverts! And your name isn't on it, either! I guess you'll just have to be considered with the rest of the garbage.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 11 Aug 12 - 10:56 PM

You are such a flippin' tool, Rap! I notiss that Don Cherry was not on yer stoopid list of famus Canadians, eh? Major oversite on your part. Don Cherry is THE MAN. And I DO know who Lee Aaron is!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Aug 12 - 03:01 PM

Amos, without looking it up, do YOU know who William Preston was? Besides being some Canadian, that is.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 12 - 12:50 PM

Oh, DOctor, Doctor, come quick. It's me Mum, DOctor! She's like, gagging and writhing like, somethin' orful!! She's been like that for HOURS, oh come quick, Doctor, please do! Nar, she ain't been drinking, but there was a big bowl of poor-grade BS she scarfed last night. But she eats like that all the time!! I can't say 't was rotting, or no, but it smelled po'ful of artifice and presumption, them what she often uses to cover up the smell, you know. Oh, Doctor, pray come quick! I am afeared she is a-dyin'!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Aug 12 - 09:22 AM

See? Shame is out there tryin' to figger out what these guys were bishops of, not who. He's thinkin', "Bishop Billy of Moose Jaw? Bishop Billy of Fort Doggerel? Billy, Bishop of Tim Horton's?" It gives his pre-paleolithic mind a headache when he tries to do complicated things like think or count to one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 10:12 PM

Billy Bishop? What about
Elvin Bishop?

I got some OLD tunes man. His whole album by that name is excellent.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 10:06 PM

Well, yeah, but Shame wouldn't know the difference. Let's face it, he wouldn't know who Hal Foster, Bjarni Tryggvason, Izzy Asper, Jack Kent Cooke, John Molson, Marie-Joseph Angelique, Colin Thatcher, Earl W. Bascom, George Klein, Jeanne Mance, Billy Bishop, Roy Brown, Isaac Brock, Tim Buck, Louis Riel, Marshall McLuhan, Northrop Frye, Bartholomew Masterson, William Preston, Hector Blake, Gil Grand, Alex Trebek, Kate Maki, or Lee Aaron. He wouldn't know Jerry Edmonton from Sebastian Bach. The boy is just plain stone dumb and couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the directions were written on the heel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 08:45 PM

My last cut was 35:47 and the remaining disc space was 35:46. Is God not pleased with me FFS! Anyone know how to ask God to gimmie a sec?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 08:37 PM

Lawrence Welk was not a Canuck. You must have him confused with Larry Whelk from Buccinidae, New Brunswick.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 08:14 PM

What, you don't LIKE Lawrence Welk? And him Canadian and all??? Ain't you PROUD of Canadians? Shame, you disgrace the great nation of Canada!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 07:40 PM

Flip YOU, man!!! Ain't you got a good word for no one? Ya know what you are? You are like a travelin' black rain cloud that flippin' pisses on everyone as it passes by, eh? I am soooo flippin' glad you do not live in my town. It would be like a curse havin' you arownd here.

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 07:36 PM

Ozzy Osborne. How VERY old-timey! Shame, do you also sing "Sidewalks of New York" and other songs from 1910? Shame, do you know that Ozzy is living in a nursing home, doesn't even have false teeth anymore, and uses a walker to shuffle down the hall to the lounge, where he watches Lawrence Welk re-runs that he listens to with his hearing aids?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 07:34 PM

Ohhhh! Ozzie minds me of the days!!! I gotta Deep Purple Machine Head with some blastin tracks man! Ain't Nobody Gonna Take My Car (Highway Star). And, from the NEW old stuff, I got so Satriani that is just bitchin!

BTW, Joe is one wild geetar man but... let me see if I can find it... the song I want at my next wedding... hang on...
a live version... you may like the studio and video versions at YT better... or I prefer the
video version.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 07:17 PM

" I shall be the envy of all at the next red light with my tunes on TEN."

Not if yer standin' next to ME, man, cos I will be drivin' Don's pickup truck, eh? It's a big red 4 x 4, and I will have Ozzie Ozbourne blastin' through the speakers and cranked up to ELEVEN!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 06:52 PM

Night time in the switchin yard. Night time in the switchin yard.

I am REALLY groovin on these tunes I haven't heard in 30+ years!

AND, I have some old new stuff by the poets of our times. Like Eminem.
OH YEAH... I got some Sade for when the traffic is slow and melllloooowwww. And some ZZ Top for when I am ziggin and zaggin through slow traffic... Antenna Head oughta be juuuusssst right. And if I want some RAMP it could be The Tragically Hip's New Orleans is Sinkin Or Jetrho Tull's Sparrow on the School Yard Wall. Then there's Barrett's Privateers or Cape St. Mary's to sing along to... aaaggghhhh!!! I gotta take my blood pressure... 126/70/61. I guess I can continue taping.

One dusty half hour's ride, up to the north...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 06:39 PM

Alas and alacky, I cannot open any links for I have recently figured out how to burn CDs of my cassette tapes and don't wish to mess up the audio feed. As I type I am recording Warren Zevon's Werewolves Of London. It shouldn't take much more time than playing the tape to have it available for my truck's CD player... although the first successful CD took about 20 hours of fuckin with this and that and buying a tape to MP3 converter and taking it back and telling them where to... BUT, the first CD done is vintage Steely Dan... 80 GLORIOUS minutes Felonious my old friend! I shall be the envy of all at the next red light with my tunes on TEN.

Nevermind the Ion tape to PC converter or the other fancy $$$ive shit programs and crap hardware... a $20 cable and an old tape player with a headphone jack and Bob's yer auntie.

Now, which of the 3000+ albums shall I record next? I have from Altan to Zevon... from Alonzo to Zappa... Zappa???... GREAT GOOGLEY MOOGLEY! WHAT SHALL I DO???


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 04:44 PM

I dare not ask what sort. Buck Rogers comes to mind...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 02:27 PM

Wahl, ta be more accurate, I got mah badge today.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 02:26 PM

Oh, yeah. Mah badge done come today.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 02:25 PM

That's...all right. I'll hitchhike (hey, not many words with a double H in 'em!). I'll probably be picked up by some sociopathetic homicidal maniac, forced to do unspeakably evil deeds and when my term in Congress is over I'll have to retire again on my ill-gotten gains. And it will be all your fault.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 11:47 AM

I'd love to deliver you, but I dunno what will be possible this year as I am driving in from Raleigh rather than MD.

Parcels accepted for delivery must be firmly wrapped in protective bubblewrap and placed in carton in good condition secured with 2" tape on all seams and clearly addressed.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 10:16 AM

Actually, that was one of the worst and most inaccurate depictions of the LBH battle that I know of. Nearly as bad at that old Budweiser print.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 10:02 AM

Ay mon, you pick me up and deliver me to BWI, eh? Maybe please?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 09:20 AM

Dang, I coulda PREdicted that fer ya, Still!

Man, I wish Rapp hadn't of showed us that Custer clip. I got savage Sioux on the brain now, counting coup on my poor haid.

Hey Mom, wasn't it nice of Stilly to check in from Arizonia? Nice, nice. I like that.

I decided not to go straight off to the Bahamas after the Getaway on account it's not that great a boat. There are so many out there!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 02:38 AM

It's hot in Arizona this time of year. Did you know that?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Aug 12 - 01:31 AM

Tell old Obie he can wiggle his shins six ways from Sunday I ain't a-coming.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Aug 12 - 09:47 PM

By the why, Obergeneralfeldmarschall Katrine von und zu Turm strongly suggests that you attend the change of command ceremony. It will be similar to this, but probably rowdier.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Aug 12 - 08:59 PM

Danger?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Aug 12 - 06:53 PM

It seems awfully quiet out there..._too_ quiet. They're up to something. You hear that? No drums. That can only mean one thing...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Aug 12 - 12:39 PM

But the unseen hand of angels,
These death-shafts warned aside,
And the dove of Heavenly mercy
Ruled o'er the battle tide;
In the houses ceased the wailing,
And through the war-scarred marts,
The people strode with a step of hope,
To the music in their hearts.




Paul Hamilton Hayne
Bombardmernt of Vicksburg


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Aug 12 - 10:59 AM

Sorry, Ober, can't make it. Another time maybe. You probably don't realize how far y'all are from civilization.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Obergeneralfeldmarschall Katrine von und zu
Date: 09 Aug 12 - 10:19 AM

Greetings! I am Obergeneralfeldmarschall Katrine von und zu Turm, commander of the Idaho Legion, and I invite all here to my installation ceremony. This will be Saturday, 11 August 2012, at the Legion Hovel in Pocatello, Idaho, 1700 hours. This will be followed by Retreat and a formal dinner. Here is a video of some guests arriving at the last Change of Command Ceremony, and here is a video of the formal dinner after.

RSVP.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Aug 12 - 01:38 AM

I try to keep my travels quiet, not wanting to advertise my absence just on general principles. You know how the General is when news of our visits get around. It's all hell to pay, and me without a handbasket.

We're in Van Horn, TX tonight.


:-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Aug 12 - 08:48 PM

I wasn't going to do anything about it, I was just checking.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Aug 12 - 06:58 PM

You're a tinhorned deaf-mute, amigo. I was iconifying the power of his music.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Aug 12 - 05:54 PM

You bad-mouthin' my friend Bruce now? Huh? Are ya?


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