Lyrics & Knowledge Personal Pages Record Shop Auction Links Radio & Media Kids Membership Help
The Mudcat Cafemuddy

Post to this Thread - Printer Friendly - Home
Page: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25] [26] [27] [28] [29] [30] [31] [32] [33] [34] [35] [36] [37] [38] [39] [40] [41] [42] [43] [44] [45] [46] [47] [48] [49] [50] [51] [52] [53] [54] [55] [56] [57] [58] [59] [60] [61] [62] [63] [64] [65] [66] [67] [68] [69] [70] [71] [72] [73] [74] [75] [76] [77] [78] [79] [80] [81] [82] [83] [84] [85] [86] [87] [88] [89] [90] [91] [92] [93] [94] [95] [96] [97] [98] [99] [100] [101] [102] [103] [104] [105] [106] [107] [108] [109] [110] [111] [112] [113] [114] [115] [116] [117] [118] [119] [120] [121] [122] [123] [124] [125] [126] [127] [128] [129] [130] [131] [132] [133] [134] [135] [136] [137] [138] [139] [140] [141] [142] [143] [144] [145] [146] [147] [148] [149] [150] [151] [152] [153] [154] [155] [156] [157] [158] [159] [160] [161] [162] [163] [164] [165] [166] [167] [168] [169] [170] [171] [172] [173] [174] [175] [176] [177] [178] [179] [180] [181] [182] [183] [184] [185] [186] [187] [188] [189] [190] [191] [192] [193] [194] [195] [196] [197] [198] [199] [200] [201] [202] [203] [204] [205] [206] [207] [208] [209] [210] [211] [212] [213] [214] [215] [216] [217] [218] [219] [220] [221] [222] [223] [224] [225] [226] [227] [228] [229] [230] [231] [232] [233] [234] [235] [236] [237] [238] [239] [240] [241] [242] [243] [244] [245] [246] [247] [248] [249] [250] [251] [252] [253] [254] [255] [256] [257] [258] [259] [260] [261] [262] [263] [264] [265] [266] [267] [268] [269] [270] [271] [272] [273] [274] [275] [276] [277] [278] [279] [280] [281] [282] [283] [284] [285] [286] [287] [288] [289] [290] [291] [292] [293] [294] [295] [296] [297] [298] [299] [300] [301] [302] [303] [304] [305] [306] [307] [308] [309] [310] [311] [312] [313] [314] [315] [316] [317] [318] [319] [320] [321] [322] [323] [324] [325] [326] [327] [328] [329] [330] [331] [332] [333] [334] [335] [336] [337] [338] [339] [340] [341] [342] [343] [344] [345] [346] [347] [348] [349] [350] [351] [352] [353] [354] [355] [356] [357] [358] [359] [360] [361] [362] [363] [364] [365] [366] [367] [368] [369] [370] [371] [372] [373] [374] [375] [376] [377] [378] [379] [380] [381] [382] [383] [384] [385] [386] [387] [388] [389] [390] [391] [392] [393] [394] [395] [396] [397] [398] [399] [400] [401] [402] [403] [404] [405] [406] [407] [408] [409] [410] [411] [412] [413] [414] [415] [416] [417] [418] [419] [420] [421] [422] [423] [424] [425] [426] [427] [428] [429] [430] [431] [432] [433] [434] [435] [436] [437] [438] [439] [440] [441] [442] [443] [444] [445] [446] [447] [448] [449] [450] [451] [452] [453] [454] [455] [456] [457] [458] [459] [460] [461] [462] [463] [464] [465] [466] [467] [468] [469] [470] [471] [472] [473] [474] [475] [476] [477] [478] [479] [480] [481] [482] [483] [484] [485] [486] [487] [488] [489] [490] [491] [492] [493] [494] [495] [496] [497] [498] [499] [500] [501] [502] [503] [504] [505] [506] [507] [508] [509] [510] [511] [512] [513] [514] [515] [516] [517] [518] [519] [520] [521] [522] [523] [524] [525] [526] [527] [528] [529] [530] [531] [532] [533] [534] [535] [536] [537] [538] [539] [540] [541] [542] [543] [544] [545] [546] [547] [548] [549] [550] [551] [552] [553] [554] [555] [556] [557] [558] [559] [560] [561] [562] [563] [564] [565] [566] [567] [568] [569] [570] [571] [572] [573] [574] [575] [576] [577] [578] [579] [580] [581] [582] [583] [584] [585] [586] [587] [588] [589] [590] [591] [592] [593] [594] [595] [596] [597] [598] [599] [600] [601] [602] [603] [604] [605] [606] [607] [608] [609] [610] [611] [612] [613] [614] [615] [616] [617] [618] [619] [620] [621] [622] [623] [624] [625] [626] [627] [628] [629] [630] [631] [632] [633] [634] [635] [636] [637] [638] [639] [640] [641] [642] [643] [644] [645] [646] [647] [648] [649] [650] [651] [652] [653] [654] [655] [656] [657] [658] [659] [660] [661] [662] [663] [664] [665] [666] [667] [668] [669] [670] [671] [672] [673] [674] [675] [676] [677] [678] [679] [680] [681] [682] [683] [684] [685] [686] [687] [688] [689] [690] [691] [692] [693] [694] [695] [696] [697] [698] [699] [700] [701] [702] [703] [704] [705] [706] [707] [708] [709] [710] [711] [712] [713] [714] [715] [716] [717] [718] [719] [720] [721] [722] [723] [724] [725] [726] [727] [728] [729] [730] [731] [732] [733] [734] [735] [736] [737] [738] [739] [740] [741] [742] [743] [744] [745] [746] [747] [748] [749] [750] [751] [752] [753] [754] [755] [756] [757] [758] [759] [760] [761] [762] [763] [764] [765] [766] [767] [768] [769] [770] [771] [772] [773] [774] [775] [776] [777] [778] [779] [780] [781] [782] [783] [784] [785] [786] [787] [788] [789] [790] [791] [792] [793] [794] [795] [796] [797] [798] [799] [800] [801] [802] [803] [804] [805] [806] [807] [808] [809] [810] [811] [812] [813] [814] [815] [816] [817] [818] [819] [820] [821] [822] [823] [824] [825] [826] [827] [828] [829] [830] [831] [832] [833] [834] [835] [836] [837] [838] [839] [840] [841] [842] [843] [844] [845] [846] [847] [848] [849] [850] [851] [852] [853] [854] [855] [856] [857] [858] [859] [860] [861] [862] [863] [864] [865] [866] [867] [868] [869] [870] [871] [872] [873] [874] [875] [876] [877] [878] [879] [880] [881] [882] [883] [884] [885] [886] [887] [888] [889] [890] [891] [892] [893] [894] [895] [896] [897] [898] [899] [900] [901] [902] [903] [904] [905] [906] [907] [908] [909] [910] [911] [912] [913] [914] [915] [916] [917] [918] [919] [920] [921] [922] [923] [924] [925] [926] [927] [928] [929] [930] [931] [932] [933] [934] [935] [936] [937] [938] [939] [940] [941] [942] [943] [944] [945] [946] [947] [948] [949] [950] [951] [952] [953] [954] [955] [956] [957] [958] [959] [960] [961] [962] [963] [964] [965] [966] [967] [968] [969] [970] [971] [972] [973] [974] [975] [976] [977] [978] [979] [980] [981] [982] [983] [984] [985] [986] [987] [988] [989] [990] [991] [992] [993] [994] [995] [996] [997] [998] [999] [1000] [1001] [1002] [1003] [1004] [1005] [1006] [1007] [1008] [1009] [1010] [1011] [1012] [1013] [1014] [1015] [1016] [1017] [1018] [1019] [1020] [1021] [1022] [1023] [1024] [1025] [1026] [1027] [1028] [1029] [1030] [1031] [1032] [1033] [1034] [1035] [1036] [1037] [1038] [1039] [1040] [1041] [1042] [1043] [1044] [1045] [1046] [1047] [1048] [1049] [1050] [1051] [1052] [1053] [1054] [1055] [1056] [1057] [1058] [1059] [1060] [1061] [1062] [1063] [1064] [1065] [1066] [1067] [1068] [1069] [1070] [1071] [1072] [1073] [1074] [1075] [1076] [1077] [1078] [1079] [1080] [1081] [1082] [1083] [1084] [1085] [1086] [1087] [1088] [1089] [1090] [1091] [1092] [1093] [1094] [1095] [1096] [1097] [1098] [1099] [1100] [1101] [1102] [1103] [1104] [1105] [1106] [1107] [1108] [1109] [1110] [1111] [1112] [1113] [1114] [1115] [1116] [1117] [1118] [1119] [1120] [1121] [1122] [1123] [1124] [1125] [1126] [1127] [1128] [1129] [1130] [1131] [1132] [1133] [1134] [1135] [1136]


BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 21 Dec 05 - 11:08 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Dec 05 - 10:11 PM
Amos 21 Dec 05 - 08:39 PM
Amos 21 Dec 05 - 07:54 PM
Rapparee 21 Dec 05 - 05:49 PM
Amos 21 Dec 05 - 10:48 AM
Rapparee 21 Dec 05 - 09:10 AM
Acme 21 Dec 05 - 02:41 AM
GUEST,Gluon!! 20 Dec 05 - 10:02 PM
Amos 20 Dec 05 - 09:10 PM
Rapparee 20 Dec 05 - 05:07 PM
Acme 20 Dec 05 - 12:08 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 19 Dec 05 - 11:07 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 05 - 05:11 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 19 Dec 05 - 04:45 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 05 - 03:06 PM
Amos 19 Dec 05 - 01:56 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 05 - 11:33 AM
Acme 19 Dec 05 - 11:17 AM
Amos 19 Dec 05 - 09:35 AM
Rapparee 19 Dec 05 - 09:01 AM
Rapparee 18 Dec 05 - 08:41 PM
Amos 18 Dec 05 - 06:01 PM
Bunnahabhain 18 Dec 05 - 01:53 PM
Rapparee 17 Dec 05 - 11:15 PM
Little Hawk 17 Dec 05 - 11:06 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Dec 05 - 09:40 PM
Rapparee 17 Dec 05 - 09:36 PM
Little Hawk 17 Dec 05 - 07:24 PM
Rapparee 17 Dec 05 - 07:20 PM
Amos 17 Dec 05 - 12:26 PM
Bunnahabhain 17 Dec 05 - 11:44 AM
Amos 17 Dec 05 - 10:48 AM
Acme 17 Dec 05 - 10:32 AM
Rapparee 17 Dec 05 - 10:27 AM
Bunnahabhain 16 Dec 05 - 07:05 PM
Rapparee 16 Dec 05 - 06:31 PM
Amos 16 Dec 05 - 06:28 PM
Rapparee 16 Dec 05 - 04:19 PM
Bunnahabhain 16 Dec 05 - 03:57 PM
Amos 16 Dec 05 - 03:11 PM
Acme 16 Dec 05 - 01:30 PM
John MacKenzie 16 Dec 05 - 11:59 AM
Amos 16 Dec 05 - 11:46 AM
Rapparee 16 Dec 05 - 11:39 AM
MMario 16 Dec 05 - 10:27 AM
John MacKenzie 16 Dec 05 - 10:13 AM
Amos 16 Dec 05 - 10:05 AM
Rapparee 16 Dec 05 - 09:24 AM
MMario 16 Dec 05 - 09:16 AM
Lyrics & Knowledge Search [Advanced]
DT  Forum
Sort (Forum) by:relevance date
DT Lyrics:






Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 11:08 PM

The nearest zoo was hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of miles away from where I grew up. Our town was so poor that we couldn't even afford to have the Republicans put up a sign, much less have a REAL elephant. We'd heard stories of course, but the best we could do was to go out of town and see a drunken cow or something. Even if there had been a zoo with a drunken elephant my family couldn't have afforded the entrance fee. But that was okay, because any time we wanted to see a wild animal we only had to look out and watch the wolf at our door. Finally, there was nothing left in the house to eat and no money to buy food with, so we ate the wolf. Then we didn't have anything to see when we looked outside. Just the piles of rubbish and trash, because we could only afford to live in the city dump.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 10:11 PM

Then there are those of us who don't want to believe in drunken elephants but have had the idea of drunken elephants shoved down our throats since we were children. We recall those embarassing Monday morning show-and-tells in elementary school when the other kids would talk about how their moms and dads took them to see the drunken elephants on Sunday mornings. Of course, our moms and dads had taken us fishing so we had to lie and say that we had been in Orlando or Atlanta and had made a special point of going to the zoo to see the drunken elephants. It was a pretty safe lie since the chances were pretty darned slim that any other kid from the north side of Jacksonville would have actually been at the zoo in Orlando and would say "Gee! I was watching the drunken elephants in Orlando on Sunday and I don't remember seeing you there." .


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 08:39 PM

In other news, it turns out people just want to believe in drunken elephants, according to reputable scientists. I know I do!

"...Folk lore has it elephants can get drunk by eating fermented fruit rotting on the ground, but a study debunks that claim, despite "eyewitness" accounts.

The study -- to appear in the March-April issue of the journal Physiological and Biochemical Zoology -- says anecdotes of drunken elephants go back more than a century.

Steve Morris, a biologist at the University of Bristol in England and a co-author of the study told National Geographic News, "People just want to believe in drunken elephants."

So! There ya go!! Next time you wonder what it is people really believe, you have an answer!

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 07:54 PM

Nothing like it. Duration is just a passing conviction, you know. Time --as you know perfectly well -- is the deep core of all neurosis, all illusion, and all madness.

But space -- now, THAT'S a bugbear. Just imagine if it wasn't so common. Or if it were less contiguous. Or less sui-generis. Wouldn't THAT be something??

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 05:49 PM

This is today. Tomorrow this will be yesterday. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow are all, therefore, one. All time is one, but all duration is not one. Duration is something else, it is duration. The xdays are time, but duration is what you experienced while waiting to be called into the Principal's office or to the dentist's chair. Duration begins when the cop turns on his red lights and signals you over. Therefore today is not duration, nor is yesterday, nor will tomorrow be. Time can stand still, but not duration.

All should now be clear.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 10:48 AM

He's not here/there just now/then, but he will-be/was.

You can tell by the faint stains on the edges of the building. IACP...


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 09:10 AM

That's one lucky cat.

I think Gluon's off at the IAC. It kinda looks like a doghouse, and besides, there are anti-gluons there and he DOES so like to play!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 21 Dec 05 - 02:41 AM

OFF! Down girl!

One of my dogs caught one of my cats in the bedroom this morning, and it was a mess of fur and pee and blood and slobber. Turned out the pee was from the cat and the blood was from the dog. The cat was injured, a dislocated (close as I can describe) jaw that will heal on its own as she's on a soft diet. If not, the vet will put a wire in to help it heal. She got the injury biting the dog. The dog is also being treated, for the bite, right on the bony bridge of her nose. Antibiotics all around. Including a week each for Moonglow and me--numerous little punctures on our hands and arms, probably from the cat when we waded in. I had to pry the dog off of the cat's leg, with a cat flailing around in the process. It was a wrestling match with a 55 pound pit bull, and as I stuck my fingers in her mouth and fought to pry open her jaw I think I kneed her to get her to let go. It all went fast and was very noisy. Everyone is sleeping it off tonight. Damned dog ran over to the bedroom door one time this evening, though. They're going to spend a lot more time outside once I get the garage area finished for them. Funny thing is, the dog didn't break anything or even break the skin on the cat. She's walking around my bedroom, a fluffed up cat with a lopsided grin. Vet said she might not want to eat for a couple of days, but good ol' Clementine downed her bowl of watered down canned cat food as soon as we walked in the door.

Gluon, would you care to help? You an herd the dogs for me, keep them out of my face while I work.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Gluon!!
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 10:02 PM

Quark! Quark!



Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 09:10 PM

Physicists at the SLAC accelerator have measured, with much greater precision than ever before, the variation in the weak nuclear force, one of the four known physical forces, over an enormous size scale (a distance of more than ten proton diameters) for so feeble a force. Although the results were not surprising (the weak force diminished with distance as expected) this new quantitative study of the weak force helps to cement physicists' view of the sub-nuclear world.

The SLAC work is, in effect, a 21st century analog of the landmark 18th experiments in which the intrinsic strength of the electromagnetic and gravitational forces were measured (by Charles Coulomb and Henry Cavendish, respectively) through careful observation of test objects causing a torsion balance to swing around. The weak force, in the modern way of thinking, is a cousin of the electromagnetic (EM) force; both of them are considered as different aspects of a single "electroweak" force.

The EM force is much better known to physicists and to non-experts: it's responsible for all electric, magnetic, and optical phenomena, and keeps atoms intact and holds atoms together in all the molecular and crystalline forms which make up our world. Over sizes larger than the atom, the strength of the EM force is prescribed by Coulomb's law, which states that the force between two charged objects (say, two electrons) is proportional to the charges of the electrons and inversely to the square of the distance between them.

For sub-atomic distances the Coulomb way of describing electron scattering gets complicated because of vacuum polarization, a process which takes into account the fact that at short distances an electron can longer be portrayed as a lone pointlike particle; instead we must view it as accompanied by a cloud of virtual particles sprouting out of the vacuum. These extra short-lived particles serve to redefine, or "renormalize," the effective electron charge and along with it the very nature of the EM force mediating the interaction with the other electron.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 05:07 PM

Are they like no-neck people?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Dec 05 - 12:08 AM

Not to be confused with No Sex marriages. I had one of those for a while (by choice!)


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 11:07 PM

The "Same Sex Marriage" thread has been deleted! That means Toledo is probably safe for another few weeks.

Unfortunately, it prevents me from posting something like "What's the big deal about same sex marriage? All marriages are same sex marriages. After about two years, the sex is always the same."


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 05:11 PM

New Jersey and Waukeegan don't exist anyway. They were sucked off...up...out...they disappeared a long, long time ago. I remember when it happened: there were two gigantic sucking sounds and all the flights bound for Neward had to be re-routed to places like Boggs Junction and Islip and Wells and Corn Creek. It was awful. People walked around for months looking for Paramus and Jersey City and Atlantic City. The Jersey Devil, who'd been shopping in New York City, had a nervous breakdown. The trains "Waukeegan Flyer" and "City of Waukeegan were sidetracked and the passengers eventually homesteaded the area -- there was nowhere else for them to go or do. Milwaukee folks bewailed the loss for months, wandering about and wringing their hands and going "Hoo hoo!" everywhere.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 04:45 PM

There's a thread on the board right now called "Same Sex Marriage". It has no content. None. Not just a blank post, but no author, no heading, no anything. It is a vacuum in cyberspace. If some clone doesn't delete it soon It will infect other threads and suck away their content. Posts will begin to disappear leaving only empty husks of threads. The entire Mudcat may well be swallowed up by the black hole that's been created by that rogue thread. Then it will start sucking in other web forums and chatrooms and porn sites until it has consumed the entire Interweb thingie. And then it'll probably make the jump from cyberspace to real space and begin sucking places like New Jersey and Waukeegan off the map.

Well folks, it's been good to know ya.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 03:06 PM

I unnerstand that the sheriff down that way stopped a coupla fellas who were pulling a tourist behind the boat on water skis. Sheriff said, "Thanks, guys. You're doing a lot for the county, taking that Yankee skiin' an' all."

One of the fellers replied, "Skiin' hell! We're trolling fer 'gators!"


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 01:56 PM

Feeding the 'gators is a durrrrty job, but someone has to do it. Better than dragging them around behind a pickup truck as some of BWL's compatriots in Floridalala recently did with an eight-foot salty. Killed the gator daid, very sad.

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 11:33 AM

BWL had dead people on his property? Were they killed by falling trees or by BWL? When he clears out the dead is he going to 'fess up, or just feed 'em to the 'gators?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 11:17 AM

Rap, I think you should let BillD and Ferrara know you'll be there. Bobert used to be closer by than he is know, but Donuel and others are in the area.

Hey, BWL, good to see you. I hope you'll favor us with a description of your seasonal exploits when you next visit. Have you finished moving out the dead and down timber?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 09:35 AM

Stay away from the Mall, too, big guy.

They are very suspicious there of folks who seem to know a lot of stuff.

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 05 - 09:01 AM

Dear Mom,

I'm going away on Friday and I'll be back on the 28th. I'll stay in touch, Mom, but I'm going to DC for a visit. Yes, yes, I know that you've told me and warned me about the sort of people that live there and that I shouldn't associate with such people as pimps and politicians, but I'm going to go see my wife's family and they're okay. I'll stay away especially from such sinks of sin and dissipation as 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and the Hoover Building and the Bureau of Engraving and Printing and the Reagan Office Building and the House and Senate Office Buildings. I promise, cross my heart and hope to die.

In the meantime, get back up where you belong!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Dec 05 - 08:41 PM

I'll be in SF in February. Can you bring the house around so I can see it?

If that doesn't work for you, I'll be in Nashville in March....


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Dec 05 - 06:01 PM

This house is now done. It has been weeks of backbreaking effort. The bedroom furniture is in; the new floors are down; the carpets are in place. Every file in my old desk has been exhumed and shuffled, and half of them sent to their maker. The garage has been emptied and scrubbed and restored to plain order. The vacuuming is done. The kitchen is clean. THe tree is up. The lights are on. The music is playing and the coffee is warm. Feel free to drop by!

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 18 Dec 05 - 01:53 PM

Blame Shatner. He's an omnipresent force for wooden acting , and worse...

Someone mentioned that it's almost 7 months since a new Shatner thread appeared. Is Little Hawk OK?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 11:15 PM

Blame Canada, I say!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 11:06 PM

They used to have gunsels in Schenectady. If you read Chongo's first adventure on this forum, you will note that he takes on Big Daddy Malone, a psychotic Orangutan gang leader from Schenectady with many gorilla gunsels at his command. Big Daddy was famous for driving his victims mad by singing "Big Rock Candy Mountain" and other such songs in a rich tenor whilst playing the banjo. Upon release from prison he vanished, but rumour has it that he re-emerged with an overall body shave as the renowned folksinger Burl Ives, having probably done away with the real Burl Ives. If it is true, then this vicious beast got away with his impersonation of Ives for many years. Blame it on Schenectady, I say!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 09:40 PM

If a collection of agents is called an agency, why isn't a collection of farms called a farmacy?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 09:36 PM

Do they have gunsels in Schenectady?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 07:24 PM

I have just one word for you. One word...























Schenectady.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 07:20 PM

It has become necessary for me to Do Something that always gives me pause. Something that borders between the pleasant and the unpleasant. Something, however, that is far, far superior to such horrors as visiting New York City or Los Angeles, but which will take me from my Little Sod Shanty On The Claim and throw me, a simple, innocent, barefoot boy with cheeks of tan, into the hustle-bustle and hurdy-gurdy of a Big City. Indeed, I must spend a week in one of the most sophisticated, most urban, and most urbane cities in the Whole Wide World.

A city I have visited a few times before.

A city renowned for its cuisine, its museums, its music, its poetry, and liberalism.

Yes, I must visit the City of the Golden Gate, the City of Hills, that little burg by the Bay, the home of Fishermen's Wharf, of Alcatraz, of Ferlinghetti and the Purple Onion, of the Presdio and Haight and Ashbury and Castro Street and the Embarcadero.

I will, during the first full week of February, 2006, be attending classes in San Francisco.

Near to Grant Avenue.

San Francisco.

California.

USA.

Gonna be tough, visiting one of my favorite cities in the whole world again...I have to leave my matched set of ivory-handled Colt .45s back home in Idaho, and I just don't know what I'll do if some would-be gunsel decides to see if she's faster.

Gonna be tought, but at least someone else will be paying for it.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 12:26 PM

There was a man once had an a opportunity to walk alongside the Devil for a while, exchanging thoughts. As they rambled and discussed, they saw another man far down the road who stopped, leaned over and picked something up.

The Devil started chuckling, and his companion asked him what he was laughing about.

"That fellow down the road there," Satan replied. "He's just discovered Truth."

"Well, why should that make you laugh?", asked his companion. "I'd think it would be a set-back for you to have someone discover Truth!"

"No, well, ya see...", replied the Prince of Darkness, "I'm going to help him organize it."

The Merriest of Christmases to all good MOABites and true, wherever you may wander.

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 11:44 AM

Now be nice to the women and they'll be nice to you (if you know what I mean, heh heh heh) even if you're one of those Scots "men" who wear a skirt.

Oh I am nice to them, I am,. In fact, I'm making wassail for the party this evening, and a non-alcoholic one, just to be nice.

I just knows she doesn't read MOAB...


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 10:48 AM

That doesn't sound all that nice. Why would one marry a devil?

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 10:32 AM

I read or heard a story some time ago about an old-time church in which the devil got into the pulpit disguised as the pastor one Sunday morning. He harangued the congregation with invective and vitreol and by ones and twos the faithful soon abandoned their place of worship--all but one old man sitting near the front.

The devil stepped down from the pulpit and addressed the old man, asking if he knew who he was. The old man assured the devil that he recognized him.

"And you're not afraid of me?" asked the Devil?

"Hell, no. I'm married to your sister!"


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 05 - 10:27 AM

Why you pickin' on the women? Do you not honor (or honour, in your case) the sex that gave you birth? The gentler sex, who drove the sassenach out of Scotland? Who inspired such Scottish heroes as Robert the Bruce, William Wallace, Sawney Bean, and The MacGregor? Where would Scotland be were it not for such as Flora MacDonald and Mary Tudor? For that matter, where would Scotland be without women?

Just a barren and blasted land, that's where. Uninhabitated. So there.

Now be nice to the women and they'll be nice to you (if you know what I mean, heh heh heh) even if you're one of those Scots"men" who wear a skirt.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 07:05 PM

Now now, dragging up old political and religious bigotry is a bad idea. Stick with safer topics.
Child 278, with bounce....

There was an old man in Devon did dwell,
and he had a wife, ands she gave him hell.

...assorted other trouble...

They say that the women are worse than the men,
They went down to hell , and came back again.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 06:31 PM

Up the long ladders and down the short ropes
Ta hell with King Billy and God Bless the Pope,
If that doesn't do it we'll tear him in two
And send him to Hell with his red, white and blue!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 06:28 PM

Up a long ladder, down a short rope;
Here's to King Billy and to hell wit da Pope!


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 04:19 PM

Well, in that case:

His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI, Bishop Of Rome And Vicar Of Jesus Christ; Successor Of St. Peter, Prince Of The Apostles; Supreme Pontiff Of The Universal Church; Patriarch Of The West; Servant Of The Servants Of God; Primate Of Italy; Archbishop And Metropolitan Of The Roman Province; Sovereign Of Vatican City State.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 03:57 PM

Better than our familiy's seemingly favourite use of scrabble, namley winding up dyslexics...


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 03:11 PM

A brilliant use of Scrabble, I must say, Mag! :)

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 01:30 PM

You can't use proper names in Scrabble. Not unless you're playing something like our home-grown modified game that we call Scribble. (In that one you get extra points if you fetch glasses of water or snacks for your mom or sibling, and you lose points for arguing. Rude words and proper nouns are allowed, and we play off of the edge of the board. The letters of two games are combined and the kids commingle their letters and take turns laying them down. They play opposite me, and if you haven't guessed by now, this was developed to encourage cooperation. It usually has a residual effect for several days after the game.)

SRS


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 11:59 AM

Yea well, we've got.......

His Royal Highness Prince Charles Philip Arthur George, Prince of Wales, KG, KT, GCB, OM, AK, QSO, PC, ADC, Earl of Chester, Duke of Cornwall, Duke of Rothesay, Earl of Carrick, Baron of Renfrew, Lord of the Isles and Prince and Great Steward of Scotland.

How's that for a Scrabble score??
G ☺


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 11:46 AM

Or Josť Carlos Ribeiro de Toledo y de Sant'Anna Vargas for short...

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 11:39 AM

Actually, we wanted to name him "Yeshua ben RalphandVanessa of Michigan", but it was kinda long, especially when you got the middle name in there.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 10:27 AM

Ten-four (hundred) good buddy!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 10:13 AM

Round figures are so attractive, don't you think?
G


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 10:05 AM

I don't see why -- it's a popular name in some circles. There's no accounting for people's buttons, though.

I always thought Areola would be a nice name for a girl.

Congratulations to you avuncular celebrants!


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 09:24 AM

I shall become a great-uncle for a second time any day now. Xavier is almost two, and Andrew is on the way.

I've been holding out for Christmas, like his grandfather. We want to name the kid "Jesus." For some reason his parents are opposed to this....


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Dec 05 - 09:16 AM

A marriage ceremony effects M-I-L's the way the full moon does werewolves - only the effect is permanent. *grin*

Did I mention I have become a great-uncle again? Rowan was born last friday - 19 inches, 5 lbs, 14 oz. Her big sister Gaia is very proud, Daddy survived the experience (though still has a dazed expression on his face when he sees her) and Uncle MMario got to hold her for three hours last night!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate
Next Page

 


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.



Mudcat time: 17 November 12:19 PM EST

[ Home ]

All original material is copyright © 1998 by the Mudcat Cafť Music Foundation, Inc. All photos, music, images, etc. are copyright © by their rightful owners. Every effort is taken to attribute appropriate copyright to images, content, music, etc. We are not a copyright resource.