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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 23 Jun 05 - 08:42 PM
Rapparee 23 Jun 05 - 05:23 PM
gnu 23 Jun 05 - 04:38 PM
Acme 23 Jun 05 - 04:27 PM
gnu 23 Jun 05 - 10:37 AM
GUEST,MMario 23 Jun 05 - 09:36 AM
Rapparee 23 Jun 05 - 09:23 AM
GUEST,Ralphs 23 Jun 05 - 12:07 AM
Amos 22 Jun 05 - 11:58 PM
GUEST,freds 22 Jun 05 - 11:53 PM
GUEST,Gluon 22 Jun 05 - 11:20 PM
GUEST,Captain Ned 22 Jun 05 - 11:08 PM
Amos 22 Jun 05 - 10:09 PM
Rapparee 22 Jun 05 - 09:49 PM
GUEST,G-Spot 22 Jun 05 - 09:18 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Jun 05 - 09:00 PM
Amos 22 Jun 05 - 08:07 PM
Acme 22 Jun 05 - 06:47 PM
Acme 22 Jun 05 - 06:45 PM
Acme 22 Jun 05 - 06:45 PM
Acme 22 Jun 05 - 06:41 PM
Rapparee 22 Jun 05 - 06:31 PM
Acme 22 Jun 05 - 06:24 PM
gnu 22 Jun 05 - 05:30 PM
Amos 22 Jun 05 - 04:34 PM
Bunnahabhain 22 Jun 05 - 02:18 PM
Donuel 22 Jun 05 - 02:06 PM
GUEST,MMario 22 Jun 05 - 01:18 PM
Acme 22 Jun 05 - 01:09 PM
Rapparee 22 Jun 05 - 11:27 AM
GUEST,MMario 22 Jun 05 - 11:18 AM
GUEST,MMario 22 Jun 05 - 11:16 AM
Amos 22 Jun 05 - 11:08 AM
Amos 22 Jun 05 - 10:37 AM
Bunnahabhain 22 Jun 05 - 10:16 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Jun 05 - 10:06 AM
Acme 22 Jun 05 - 09:55 AM
Liz the Squeak 22 Jun 05 - 09:41 AM
Liz the Squeak 22 Jun 05 - 09:40 AM
Rapparee 22 Jun 05 - 09:38 AM
GUEST,G-Spot 22 Jun 05 - 09:00 AM
Rapparee 22 Jun 05 - 08:49 AM
GUEST,MMario 22 Jun 05 - 08:42 AM
JennyO 21 Jun 05 - 11:23 PM
Amos 21 Jun 05 - 10:36 PM
GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell 21 Jun 05 - 10:26 PM
GUEST,G-Spot 21 Jun 05 - 09:59 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Jun 05 - 09:52 PM
GUEST,G-Spot 21 Jun 05 - 09:45 PM
Amos 21 Jun 05 - 09:29 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 08:42 PM

MICROBES CAN PRODUCE ELECTRICAL NANOWIRES, June 23

Researchers at the University of Massachusetts Amherst have discovered a tiny biological structure that is highly electrically conductive. This breakthrough helps describe how microorganisms can clean up groundwater and produce electricity from renewable resources. It may also have applications in the emerging field of nanotechnology, which develops advanced materials and devices in extremely small dimensions.

Full story at http://www.physorg.com/news4722.html


Git them buggers to work, I sez. They can start by disassemblin all the stuff in landfills and the spent fuel rods from the 80's and such. If we hire Arab microbes, they will already know how to disassemble, according to Presidunkin "Doughnut-Brain" Bush.

A


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 05:23 PM

Skeeter beater? Out here in Idyho we either smash 'em with a hammer er a rock or jist whip out the ol' six-shooter and blow the little buggers ta kingdom come.

Why, jist t'other evenin' I was sittin' outside the saloon when ol' Deadface started braggin' what good vision he had. One thing led ta another and afore ya know it we was engaged in a shootin' contest. Ol' Deadface says ta me, "Ya see that butterfly out there on the hitchin' rack off in fronta the General Store?" "The one about two hunndert yards out?" I asks, "the one with the orange wings with spots on 'em?"

"Yup," he says, and by cracky if he don't up and shoot the critter, drillin' it right atween the eyes!

"Ya see the skeeter on the church steeple?" I asks him.

"That cross-eyed one on the left?" he says.

"Yup," I reply and whip out my .44 and shoot it.

"Ya missed!" Deadface says. "It's still flyin' around!"

"Yup," says I. "But he ain't never gonna have any more kids."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 04:38 PM

You mean, since I did, I really didn't? So, when you didn't, you really did? But, doesn't the fact that I really did and you really didn't... okay, time to back away from the keyboard and have a few cold ones. Let's forget this ever happened.

Soooo, how's the formula for your Skeeter Beater coming along?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 04:27 PM

You're right, so you didn't. :) My trusty dyslexia to the rescue again!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 10:37 AM

SRS... but, I did.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 09:36 AM

solve the mysteries of quarks with the completion of the three most powerful supercomputers ever applied to this problem

as usual - this must be a government funded operation - because how they expect to solve the mysteries of quarks using computers!!! What they need, as any good MOABite could tell them is a flock of ducks, a bunch of airedales, some candlelight, and a romantic setting.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 09:23 AM

Dear God. They're back. Hide the likker an' wimmen an' load up the rifles.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Ralphs
Date: 23 Jun 05 - 12:07 AM

Har! Who the fuck is that pretending to be Freds? Har! Freds don't say "Har!" after every sentence! Har! Ralphs say "Har!" after every sentence! Har! Ralphs are the most annoying species in the known Universe! Har! Freds are pipsqueak wannabes! Har! Get a life, "freds"! Har! Har! Har!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:58 PM

LIVERPOOL SCIENTISTS HELP TO SOLVE THE MYSTERIES OF QUARKS


June 21
Particle physicists are embarking on a new attempt to solve the mysteries of quarks with the completion of the three most powerful supercomputers ever applied to this problem, including one in Edinburgh which scientists at the University of Liverpool helped to design and build.
Full story at http://www.physorg.com/news4643.html


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:53 PM

Har!

That dinner date seems to have slipped past me and me pals, HAR! The plate is empty, was never filled with DNA-bearing-meat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Gluon
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:20 PM

QUARK!!! QUARK!!!


Translation: I also have nothing to say. Just thought I'd stop by and say

QUARK!!! QUARK!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Captain Ned
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:08 PM

There once was a troop
Of Irish baboons
Came bumbling down to Fyfe-e-o
And our captain
(that's me!) fell in love
With a very bonny lass
And her name it was called Pretty Polly-O.

(Chorus)
O Polly, pretty Polly, come away with me,
O Polly, pretty Polly, come away with me,
Before we get married some pleasure to see, YEE-HA!

Oh, how can I get to your chamber, love,
How can I get to your bed
When your daddy goes to bed at night
With a keen eye on his head?

(Chorus)
Eileen Orr, me heart is turning gray
Ever since the day you wandered far away.
Eileen Orr, There's more fish in the sea,
But there's none just like the Pride of Petrovar, YEE-HA!

In the middle of the track, up spoke the noble rider,
"I fear we must fall back that grey is runnin' like a tiger."
Up spoke the noble horse, "Ride on, ride on my master!
We're only halfway 'round the course and now we'll see who's faster."

(Chorus)
An' ye had been whaur I hae been
Ye wadna been sae cantie-o
An' ye had seen what I hae seen
On the braes o' Killiecrankie-o, YEE-HA!

From Derry's wild woodlands from Maine's sounding tide
From Leitrim and Longford came chiefs to our side
From Breffni's green hills, with his sabre in hand
Stood bold Myles the slasher, the pride of our land!

(Chorus)
Lint-a-naddy, tour-a-naddy, lint-a-naddy, tour-a-nee
Lint-in-lowrin, lowrin, lowrin, the barnyards of Delgaty, YEE-HA!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 10:09 PM

And the moon was shining brightly
Shining with all its might
Which as it was near midnight's hour
Was only just, and right.

The sun was pouting elsewhere,
As usual, with the sun,
Blaming the moon for coming out
And damping down his fun.

But Sarah cared nought for the sky,
Such cares she did defer;
But danced so joyously that I
Had only eyes for her.

Carruthers Broadbent III
"Love Songs from the Very Rich"
Buckstop and Snickersnee, Hartford, 1947


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:49 PM

The moon it shown down on old Dublin Town
When the rowdy night was o'er.
Thousands lay on the cold, cold ground
Their bodies could hold no more,
The moon it shown down on O'Connell Street
Where a drunken young tosspot lay
With his wineskin slashed and his arms outstretched
And his Black Bush flowin' away.

A passing comrade heard the moans,
The sufferer soon was found.
Softly, gently he raised his head
Up from the cold, cold ground.
"Softly, gently, Comrade!" he cried,
"No longer on Earth can I stay
I shall nevermore drink as I drank last night,
For it's married I'm gettin' today."

His comrades gathered around him
To give him a fare-the-well;
He was as drinkin' and rowdy man
As ever to womankind fell,
They dug a grave and in it they laid
The youth of a fellow once gay*;
He will nevermore drink as he drank last night,
For it's married he's gettin' today.




*Not "gay", but given to drinking and carousing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,G-Spot
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:18 PM

Born on a mountain top in Tennessee,

Greenest state in the land of the free.

Raised in the woods so he knew every tree

Killed him a "bar" when he was only three.

The next thing you know Old Jed's a millionaire

Kin folk said "Jed, Move away from there!"

Said "Californey is the place you ought to be"

Killed him a bear when he was only three

(Cub, that is; baby bear, not too big)

GS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:00 PM

I don't have a thing to say. But getting this thread to open, especially via the front door, is such a rare occurence anymore that I simply can't leave without saying something.

So... "Something"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 08:07 PM

Well, I profooundly apologize for using your NEWS story as BS Fodder. I thought it would surely bring a bit of leonine repartee, that was the mane idea.

Odd is right!! Is this a Bulgarian writing English or some kind of expat? I like this ditty:

Turn back, turn back and live again,
give not your victory to the pain.
Life's a potential, you must choose,
you either win, or else you lose.

And if you lose, then be forgiving,
you still can learn the ways of living.
Like Phoenix, rise up from your tears.
You've joy to find in future years.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 06:47 PM

Odd little site. Here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 06:45 PM

8200

Opilione the Harvestman part only

The harvestman, she's not a spider,
she has no poison glands inside her.
No fangs, no web, no spinnerets.
She really makes a lovely pet.

You can keep her in an ice-cream box,
with dirt and leaves, and a few rocks.
One other thing you must include
are smaller bugs, they are her food.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 06:45 PM

And here's an odd little one:

Another Dead Mosquito

A little mosquito once sat on my arm,
her evil intent was to cause me some harm.
To stick in her proboscis and suck up my blood,
leaving behind a sore itch I must rub.
I think its quite mean doing something like that....

So I raised my right hand and I swatted her flat.


Comes from a book of "Poetry for the Family" that you can buy for $10.

    To get your copy send a cheque for $10.00 US
    made payable to Pensoft Publishing, to the following address.

    Pensoft Publishers,
    Acad. G. Bonchev Str., Bl.6,
    1113 Sofia,
    Bulgaria.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 06:41 PM

I was reminded of something over on Bobert's moving day blues thread. I wondered if there were any elegies to mosquitoes.

The Mosquito
William Cullen Bryant


Fair insect! that with threadlike legs spread out
And blood-extracting bill and filmy wing,
Dost murmur, as thou slowly sail'st about,
In pitiless ears, full many a plaintive thing,
And tell how little our large veins should bleed,
Would we but yield them to thy bitter need?

Unwillingly I own, and, what is worse,
Full angrily men hearken to thy plaint;
Thou gettest many a brush and many a curse,
For saying thou art gaunt and starved and faint.
Even the old beggar, while he asks for food,
Would kill thee, hapless stranger, if he could.

I call thee stranger, for the town, I ween,
Has not the honor of so proud a birth-
Thou com'st from Jersey meadows, fresh and green,
The offspring of the gods, though born on earth;
For Titan was thy sire, and fair was she,
The ocean nymph that nursed thy infancy.

Beneath the rushes was thy cradle swung,
And when at length thy gauzy wings grew strong,
Abroad to gentle airs their folds were flung,
Rose in the sky, and bore thee soft along;
The south wind breathed to waft thee on thy way,
And danced and shone beneath the billowy bay.

It does run on for many more stanzas, and if you really want to read the rest, it is here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 06:31 PM

Or even Life, Infinity, and Everything, or LIE.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 06:24 PM

gnu, Amos was a little slow with that story. I posted it on I Read it in the Newspaper hours, nay, nearly an entire day before he did here at the MOAB.

What's it about? Better to ask what it ISN'T about, but once you have an answer, that will be included in our subject matter. Douglas Adams said it best--the MOAB is about Life, the Universe, and Everything.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 05:30 PM

I only posted to this thread once, near the beginning, and have never read much of it, but, something made me click on it today. It must have been the post by Amos about the lions saving the girl... brought tears to my eyes. So... what isn't this thread about?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 04:34 PM

To freely and generously gibber
Whether liar, sooth-sayer or fibber
Is all of our care
When we all do repair
To the MOAB, the home of ad-libbers!

(Mom says this will make my typing fingers grow hair or something, but I sometimes wonder if she knows as much as she pretends....)


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 02:18 PM

True,

Gibberish generated freely,
Is our purpose here, really,
The Tavern I've lost,
And the ability to find a rhyme for this line,
Causing other mistakes unseemly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 02:06 PM

Today at The White House.org

http://www.whitehouse.org/index.asp


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 01:18 PM

bar stool? didn't know we'd had any bar in the Tavern recently - they got upset the last time someone broke into "Davy Crockett" when they came in.

And it could have been worse - you could have leaned against a freds.


oh - blast - now I don't know whether I'm at the Tavern or at Mom's.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 01:09 PM

Bunnahabhain, now don't you start! It's enough to have had a guest hijack the thread and demand we toe he/she/its line instead of generating our usual voluable banter. I don't need a regular mis-interpreting me! Have you been over to the Mudcat Tavern? Then you'll know that LtS has a command of BS second to none. So the little Flamenco Ted moment was cute, but left me wanting more, you know what I mean?

Ah, for the good old days with the duck tape in the loo. LtS was very patient and a good sport about that. . . I can smell MMario's roasted auroch whafting out from the kitchen, can taste the cold beer, and darnit, I leaned my sleeve in the puddle of jello on the bar and I think I'm stuck to the barstool.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:27 AM

MMario, you're just not yourself. Take a deep breath and cold beer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:18 AM

of course, last month I was Friar Wolfgang Tuck - and it was sometime in the early 1100's - which doesn't help.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:16 AM

well Bee-dubya - I'll tell you:

Mostly it is the fact that in 1560 I'm Owain Cramp- a failed wannabee minstrel with test anxiety - who has flunked his apprenticship exams for 40 years straight. So I'm nothing but the pre-minstrel Cramp. But I *can* carry a tune in a bucket and I prove it!

and in 1585 I'm Mario Leo a Pola de Finale Emilia, an Englishman born, by descent from the Italies,wandering taylor, proffessional uncle, and a servant to the rich (because it doesn't pay to be a servant to the poor) - currenlty indentured to a pair of Spainards - trying to raise enough money to bribe the Armada to stay home.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 11:08 AM

In other news of import, an inter-species ad hoc team-building worthy of special note:

"ADDIS ABABA, Ethiopia ? A 12-year-old girl who was abducted and beaten by men trying to force her into a marriage was found being guarded by three lions that apparently had chased off her captors, a policeman said yesterday.

The girl, missing for a week, had been taken by seven men who wanted to force her to marry one of them, said Sgt. Wondimu Wedajo, speaking by telephone from the provincial capital of Bita Genet, about 350 miles southwest of Addis Ababa.

She was beaten repeatedly before she was found June 9 by police and relatives on the outskirts of Bita Genet, Wondimu said. She had been guarded by the lions for about half a day, he said.

"They stood guard until we found her and then they just left her like a gift and went back into the forest," Wondimu said.

"If the lions had not come to her rescue, then it could have been much worse. Often these young girls are raped and severely beaten to force them to accept the marriage," he said.

Tilahun Kassa, a local government official who corroborated Wondimu's version of the events, said one of the men had wanted to marry the girl against her wishes.

"Everyone thinks this is some kind of miracle, because normally the lions would attack people," Wondimu said.

Stuart Williams, a wildlife expert with the rural-development ministry, said the girl may have survived because she was crying from the trauma of her attack.

"A young girl whimpering could be mistaken for the mewing sound from a lion cub, which in turn could explain why they didn't eat her," Williams said."




How about them lions, hey??


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 10:37 AM

If you were born in 1550 it would make all the difference in the world.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 10:16 AM

Now now SRS, don't be mean. Little posts like that add to the whole general mish-mash sort of thing ( sorry, last ever episode of HHGG on last night, does it show? ), and gives everyone else a time to think.

On the other hand, thinking round here is probably not a good idea....

Quick, kipple and they'll not notice!

White Horses



Where run your colts at pasture?
Where hide your mares to breed?
'Mid bergs about the Ice-cap
Or wove Sargasso weed;
By chartless reef and channel,
Or crafty coastwise bars,
But most the ocean-meadows
All purple to the stars!

Who holds the rein upon you?
The latest gale let free.
What meat is in your mangers?
The glut of all the sea.
'Twixt tide and tide's returning
Great store of newly dead, --
The bones of those that faced us,
And the hearts of those that fled.
Afar, off-shore and single,
Some stallion, rearing swift,
Neighs hungry for new fodder,
And calls us to the drift:
Then down the cloven ridges --
A million hooves unshod --
Break forth the mad White Horses
To seek their meat from God!

Girth-deep in hissing water
Our furious vanguard strains --
Through mist of mighty tramplings
Roll up the fore-blown manes --
A hundred leagues to leeward,
Ere yet the deep is stirred,
The groaning rollers carry
The coming of the herd!

Whose hand may grip your nostrils --
Your forelock who may hold?
E'en they that use the broads with us --
The riders bred and bold,
That spy upon our matings,
That rope us where we run --
They know the strong White Horses
From father unto son.

We breathe about their cradles,
We race their babes ashore,
We snuff against their thresholds,
We nuzzle at their door;
By day with stamping squadrons,
By night in whinnying droves,
Creep up the wise White Horses,
To call them from their loves.

And come they for your calling?
No wit of man may save.
They hear the loosed White Horses
Above their fathers' grave;
And, kin of those we crippled,
And, sons of those we slew,
Spur down the wild white riders
To school the herds anew.

What service have ye paid them,
Oh jealous steeds and strong?
Save we that throw their weaklings,
Is none dare work them wrong;
While thick around the homestead
Our snow-backed leaders graze --
A guard behind their plunder,
And a veil before their ways.

With march and countermarchings --
With weight of wheeling hosts --
Stray mob or bands embattled --
We ring the chosen coasts:
And, careless of our clamour
That bids the stranger fly,
At peace with our pickets
The wild white riders lie.

        .        .        .        .

Trust ye that curdled hollows --
Trust ye the neighing wind --
Trust ye the moaning groundswell --
Our herds are close behind!
To bray your foeman's armies --
To chill and snap his sword --
Trust ye the wild White Horses,
The Horses of the Lord!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 10:06 AM

This weekend I'm to be in 1560 0r so, the rest of the summer weekends I'll be spending in 1585.

So tell us, Leo, what's so different about 1560 and 1585 that bouncing back and forth while in character would be so traumatic? 1960 to 1985 I could understand. But was the rate of social/technological change in the 16th century so rapid that 25 years would make a big difference?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:55 AM

Liz, that didn't contribute greatly to the BS load. Think of something more to add, please! And how are things going over at the Tavern? Is the squid still full of ginger? I'll check in later.

The kids are coming home today after 2 1/2 weeks in Florida. I have to go clean up the house so they can mess it up again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:41 AM

YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!

Post 8181!!

Well I like it!

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:40 AM

I wonder....... Could I????

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:38 AM

How odd.

What a beautiful description of MOAB.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,G-Spot
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 09:00 AM

How odd. I will be in 1985, which was for me, a very good year, as I had at least 1985 in me.

GS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 08:49 AM

Hey, this Saturday I'll be dropping in there as well! The SCA will be doin' their things at the Library! Arts, crafts, sword fights, and men in tights. Maybe we can have beer or something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 22 Jun 05 - 08:42 AM

I'm so confused! Can anyone give me a synopsis of the last week? On second thought, never mind, it would probably confuse me further.

This weekend I'm to be in 1560 0r so, the rest of the summer weekends I'll be spending in 1585. So I have a right to be confused. maybe. what's my name again?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 21 Jun 05 - 11:23 PM

.....from someone else's mother.

Not ours, though. She's true blue.


zzzzzzz - hnnnmmphfrf huh huh - oh - er g'day mate.
Yer just woke up the Aussies.
Wot a fine way to describe yer mother. Yeah.

True Blue - displays the Aussie ideals of a fair go for all, mateship, having a go, and solving problems. Yep, that's Mother all right.


*sings*

Hey True Blue, don't say you've gone
Say you've knocked off for a smoko
And you'll be back later on
Hey True Blue, Hey True Blue

Give it to me straight
Face to face
Are you really disappearing,
Just another dying race,
Hey True Blue.

True Blue, is it me and you?
Is it Mum and Dad, is it a cockatoo?
Is it standing by your mate
When he's in a fight?
Or just Vegemite
True Blue, I'm asking you...

Hey True Blue, can you bear the load?
Will you tie it up with wire,
Just to keep the show on the road?
Hey True Blue, Hey True Blue, now be Fair Dinkum

Is your heart still there?
If they sell us out like sponge cake
Do you really care?
Hey True Blue.

True Blue, is it me and you?
Is it Mum and Dad, is it a cockatoo?
Is it standing by your mate
When she's in a fight?
Or just Vegemite
True Blue, I'm asking you...

True Blue, is it me and you?
Is it Mum and Dad, is it a cockatoo?
Is it standing by your mate
When he's in a fight?
Or just Vegemite
True Blue ... True Blue.


A gem by John Williamson of course.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Jun 05 - 10:36 PM

That was about the point where Gluon had enough of his father's endless boson and lepton the first orbital transition out of town; he drew on his inner resources of strange attraction and strong force to find his way to the MOAB where he has been happily charming all and sundry ever since.

G-spot, I am sorry to hear of your neglected condition, but with a name like yours, I am sure you can drum up some testosteronic vibes somewhere around the Cat -- we seem to have far too much of the stuff from time to time. It comes in waves. Sometimes it gets so bad all the librarians leave town to go shoot at each other with black powder rifles or slice each other up with sabers, before returning to their more peaceable haunts. Other times, we're all a bunch of wusses.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Jun 05 - 10:26 PM

Well, it's only natural that Gluon should have an affinity for G-Spot's leg. After all, "G...Spot" was Gluon's father's name. Well, his real name was just "Spot", but he was a very ill-behaved mutt and he came to be called "Goddammed Stupid Fucking Shit-for-Brains Spot" more often than not. But, since "Goddammed Stupid Fucking Shit-for-Brains Spot" takes too long to type out, he came to be known as "G...Spot".

Gluon's mother, on the other hand, was named "Fupp Duck" which is a pretty good description of her mental condition when she agreed to consort with a mongrel like G...Spot. Woke up in the morning, looked at the empty Cuervo bottle, looked at G...Spot and said, "Shit!"

Surely you didn't think the circumstances leading to the birthing of a duck-dog would be anything but sordid, did you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,G-Spot
Date: 21 Jun 05 - 09:59 PM

No! No! Not such a hurry there, Bee-dubya. It has been to long since certain attention has been paid to me...a little leg humping may be fun!

GS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Jun 05 - 09:52 PM

Aw shucks, G-Spot, being either ignored or answered with cryptic messages that mean absolutely nothing is par for the course around here. Happens all the time. Think of the cryptic messages as something akin to Zen koans. They may not make a lot of sense, but they point the way toward something dimly glimpsed yet forever slightly out of our reach. It's like... No! Wait a minute! It's coming into focus now. I can almost see it clearly now! It's... Gluon! Get off of G-Spot's leg, dammit!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,G-Spot
Date: 21 Jun 05 - 09:45 PM

Very well. I have as last received a reasonable response. Thank you, Amos.

Pardon my "snipping". This is your house. I forgot that I am a guest. I apologize.

Perhaps my future visits will be less combative.

GS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Jun 05 - 09:29 PM

Aw, gee. A darned Skinnerian!!   

G-spot, I never assumed you had any gender one way, or the other. You're not gonna start whining about not being warmly embraced, now, are ya? Welcome to the MOAB, young lady.

See, the thing is, this sandbox is for those who participate there in. It is meant to offer some respite for those who come here freely and in goodwill. Because, hell, if we wanted to be snipped at, we coulda stayed on the political threads or almost any other, and we like the local style better. For one thing, it is kinda non-judgemental, if you see what I mean. We enjoy each other without having to evaluate whether others here, or we ourselves, measure up to some condescending standard of the sort usually emanating from someone else's mother.

Not ours, though. She's true blue.

A


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