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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Donuel 11 Jul 17 - 11:38 AM
Rapparee 11 Jul 17 - 10:14 AM
Rapparee 11 Jul 17 - 09:36 AM
Rapparee 10 Jul 17 - 08:18 PM
Acme 10 Jul 17 - 04:56 PM
Donuel 10 Jul 17 - 02:36 PM
keberoxu 10 Jul 17 - 12:13 PM
Donuel 10 Jul 17 - 11:13 AM
Donuel 10 Jul 17 - 10:19 AM
Rapparee 10 Jul 17 - 09:42 AM
Donuel 10 Jul 17 - 09:31 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 09 Jul 17 - 10:37 PM
Rapparee 09 Jul 17 - 10:24 PM
Acme 09 Jul 17 - 10:00 PM
Rapparee 09 Jul 17 - 09:11 PM
Donuel 09 Jul 17 - 12:51 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 09 Jul 17 - 12:17 PM
Acme 09 Jul 17 - 10:55 AM
Donuel 08 Jul 17 - 11:41 PM
Rapparee 08 Jul 17 - 10:42 PM
Rapparee 08 Jul 17 - 10:34 PM
Donuel 08 Jul 17 - 08:03 PM
Acme 08 Jul 17 - 09:15 AM
Rapparee 07 Jul 17 - 09:37 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 07 Jul 17 - 08:31 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 07 Jul 17 - 12:58 PM
Donuel 07 Jul 17 - 11:56 AM
Acme 07 Jul 17 - 11:36 AM
Donuel 07 Jul 17 - 11:29 AM
Rapparee 07 Jul 17 - 09:37 AM
Rapparee 06 Jul 17 - 09:14 AM
Donuel 06 Jul 17 - 08:17 AM
Rapparee 05 Jul 17 - 08:57 PM
Acme 05 Jul 17 - 08:39 PM
Rapparee 05 Jul 17 - 07:40 PM
Rapparee 04 Jul 17 - 08:06 PM
Amos 04 Jul 17 - 06:14 PM
Acme 04 Jul 17 - 03:51 PM
Rapparee 04 Jul 17 - 10:09 AM
Donuel 03 Jul 17 - 09:35 PM
Rapparee 03 Jul 17 - 09:02 PM
keberoxu 03 Jul 17 - 11:11 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 03 Jul 17 - 10:48 AM
Donuel 03 Jul 17 - 09:41 AM
Rapparee 02 Jul 17 - 08:52 PM
Acme 02 Jul 17 - 01:31 PM
gnu 02 Jul 17 - 11:33 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Jul 17 - 10:22 AM
Rapparee 01 Jul 17 - 05:28 PM
gnu 01 Jul 17 - 10:33 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 11 Jul 17 - 11:38 AM

When Ed Koch the Mayor of New York City who awarded the mob to renovate the Central Park ice rink failed after 6 years to finish the projects I hired the King of Trump construction, and Bel, the lord of Heaven and earth, who decreed the land to be assigned to Marduk Inc and finished the project ahead of schedule. I made it great on earth, and founded an everlasting kingdom of Real Estate in Manhattan whose foundations are laid so solidly as those of heaven and earth; then Bel Construction called by name me, Donald J Trump, the exalted prince, who feared no loans, to bring about the rule of righteousness in the land, to destroy the wicked tenants and the evil-doers; so that the strong should not harm the weak; so that I should rule over the black people like Shamash, and enlighten the land, to further the well-being of my fortune.


I managed the temple of Taj Mahal; the grave of the enemy, whose help brought about the victory; who increased the power of Cutthroats; made all glorious in Atlantic City and the Jersey Mob who gored the enemy; The Attorney General of New Jersey, The Donald and Trump. I Donald Trump who recognizes the alt right, who rules by my law; who gave back to the city of New York my name atop Hotels who let the name remain in Trump City and now Washington DC.      
I Donald Trump who never humbles himself before the great gods; successor of Bankruptcy is the hugest one of all.

I am the mighty son of Queens and the royal scum of Eternity; the mighty monarch, the sun of the East River, whose rays shed light over the land of Broads of the Universe obeyed by the four quarters of organized crime Beloved of Russia am I President Donald Trump


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 17 - 10:14 AM

The preamble of the Code of Hammurabi (I doubt that you've seen it before):

When Anu the Sublime, King of the Anunaki, and Bel, the lord of Heaven and earth, who decreed the fate of the land, assigned to Marduk, the over-ruling son of Ea, God of righteousness, dominion over earthly man, and made him great among the Igigi, they called Babylon by his illustrious name, made it great on earth, and founded an everlasting kingdom in it, whose foundations are laid so solidly as those of heaven and earth; then Anu and Bel called by name me, Hammurabi, the exalted prince, who feared God, to bring about the rule of righteousness in the land, to destroy the wicked and the evil-doers; so that the strong should not harm the weak; so that I should rule over the black-headed people like Shamash, and enlighten the land, to further the well-being of mankind.

Hammurabi, the prince, called of Bel am I, making riches and increase, enriching Nippur and Dur-ilu beyond compare, sublime patron of E-kur; who reestablished Eridu and purified the worship of E-apsu; who conquered the four quarters of the world, made great the name of Babylon, rejoiced the heart of Marduk, his lord who daily pays his devotions in Saggil; the royal scion whom Sin made; who enriched Ur; the humble, the reverent, who brings wealth to Gish-shir-gal; the white king, heard of Shamash, the mighty, who again laid the foundations of Sippara; who clothed the gravestones of Malkat with green; who made E-babbar great, which is like the heavens, the warrior who guarded Larsa and renewed E-babbar, with Shamash as his helper; the lord who granted new life to Uruk, who brought plenteous water to its inhabitants, raised the head of E-anna, and perfected the beauty of Anu and Nana; shield of the land, who reunited the scattered inhabitants of Isin; who richly endowed E-gal-mach; the protecting king of the city, brother of the god Zamama; who firmly founded the farms of Kish, crowned E-me-te-ursag with glory, redoubled the great holy treasures of Nana, managed the temple of Harsag-kalama; the grave of the enemy, whose help brought about the victory; who increased the power of Cuthah; made all glorious in E-shidlam, the black steer, who gored the enemy; beloved of the god Nebo, who rejoiced the inhabitants of Borsippa, the Sublime; who is indefatigable for E-zida; the divine king of the city; the White, Wise; who broadened the fields of Dilbat, who heaped up the harvests for Urash; the Mighty, the lord to whom come scepter and crown, with which he clothes himself; the Elect of Ma-ma; who fixed the temple bounds of Kesh, who made rich the holy feasts of Nin-tu; the provident, solicitous, who provided food and drink for Lagash and Girsu, who provided large sacrificial offerings for the temple of Ningirsu; who captured the enemy, the Elect of the oracle who fulfilled the prediction of Hallab, who rejoiced the heart of Anunit; the pure prince, whose prayer is accepted by Adad; who satisfied the heart of Adad, the warrior, in Karkar, who restored the vessels for worship in E-ud-gal-gal; the king who granted life to the city of Adab; the guide of E-mach; the princely king of the city, the irresistible warrior, who granted life to the inhabitants of Mashkanshabri, and brought abundance to the temple of Shidlam; the White, Potent, who penetrated the secret cave of the bandits, saved the inhabitants of Malka from misfortune, and fixed their home fast in wealth; who established pure sacrificial gifts for Ea and Dam-gal-nun-na, who made his kingdom everlastingly great; the princely king of the city, who subjected the districts on the Ud-kib-nun-na Canal to the sway of Dagon, his Creator; who spared the inhabitants of Mera and Tutul; the sublime prince, who makes the face of Ninni shine; who presents holy meals to the divinity of Nin-a-zu, who cared for its inhabitants in their need, provided a portion for them in Babylon in peace; the shepherd of the oppressed and of the slaves; whose deeds find favor before Anunit, who provided for Anunit in the temple of Dumash in the suburb of Agade; who recognizes the right, who rules by law; who gave back to the city of Ashur its protecting god; who let the name of Ishtar of Nineveh remain in E-mish-mish; the Sublime, who humbles himself before the great gods; successor of Sumula-il; the mighty son of Sin-muballit; the royal scion of Eternity; the mighty monarch, the sun of Babylon, whose rays shed light over the land of Sumer and Akkad; the king, obeyed by the four quarters of the world; Beloved of Ninni, am I.


Kinda conceited was he.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Jul 17 - 09:36 AM

Remember, it was only 1,100 years ago that the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle reported that "This year rode the army, after Easter, out of Northampton and Leicester; and having broken the truce they slew many men at Hookerton and thereabout. Then, very soon after this, as the others came home, they found other troops that were riding out against Leighton. But the inhabitants were aware of it; and having fought with them they put them into full flight; and arrested all that they had taken, and also of their horses and of their weapons a good deal."

I tell you this so that you are aware of it and all that proceeded from it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 08:18 PM

Damn Straight! I'm retired. You want I should do all your work for you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 04:56 PM

Look it up!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 02:36 PM

In this mortal life there is mostly tedium and envy!

The prose intent is incontinent. It is a collection of poor metaphors. Its devoid of charm, but I see no harm.

...somebody turn off that klaxon alarm!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 12:13 PM

Delighted, Rapparee, to see Robin Flower's elegant translation of Pangur Bán posted here, many thanks.

Samuel Barber, in his Hermit Songs cycle from the marginalia of monastery manuscripts, set to music a prose approach to Pangur Bán.
The translator is W. H. Auden.

Pangur, white Pangur,
How happy we are, alone together,
Scholar and cat.

Each has his own work to do daily;
For you, it is hunting;
For me, study.

Your shining eye watches the wall;
My feeble eye is fixed on a book.

You rejoice when your claws entrap a mouse;
I rejoice when my mind fathoms a problem.

Pleased with his own art,
Neither hinders the other.
Thus we live ever, without tedium and envy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 11:13 AM

I always avoid rhyming every two lines like a klaxon bell blasting a rhythm for Roman galley oarsmen. Its up to a singer or speaker to enhance the intent beyond matching sounds and rhythm.

For example in the latest poem, the word Gon-di has a slight pause before gon and 'di' and a much smaller pause before the next line.

One can also rhyme with concepts beyond similar sounds like genre or category. Have you ever tried rhyming in different senses other than sound? In this way you can telegraph the unsaid as if the idea comes from inside a readers head. I don't know the word for using expectation instead but works if you come from mountain folk or kings and are in- a hurry.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 10:19 AM

The following 12 photos of her are less modest.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 09:42 AM

Oh My God! You can see their knees! Hussies! Harlots! They probably work in Cataloging (those people don't get out much)! Notice how this librarian modestly covers her knees.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 10 Jul 17 - 09:31 AM

above the knee? tsk tsk... and Leah knows it.



`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

In Egypt's ancient Library
a scribe late at night described
"a mouse saw a cat but didn't hide
It tapped the cat, it was scary

The cat ate the entire mouse
What spell did the cat cast so well?"
It was the mouse brain truth to tell
Toxoplasmosis is in your house

The parasite controls all mice
for cats to eat them to live on
toxo grows in cats then is gondi.
Toxo controls brains its not nice

Cats don't have owners they have staff.
Cat lovers may have toxo brains
and do not bother to complain
It could be you so do not laugh

Donuel 9:31 AM Monday


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Jul 17 - 10:37 PM

Leaked photo from this year's Research Librarian Swimsuit Competition.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jul 17 - 10:24 PM

There are quite a few librarians I don't want to see in a swimsuit. On the other hand....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Jul 17 - 10:00 PM

Swimsuit competition? Swimsuit competition? Librarians don't wear no stinking swimsuits.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Jul 17 - 09:11 PM

I and Pangur Ban my cat,
'Tis a like task we are at:
Hunting mice is his delight,
Hunting words I sit all night.

Better far than praise of men
'Tis to sit with book and pen;
Pangur bears me no ill-will,
He too plies his simple skill.

'Tis a merry task to see
At our tasks how glad are we,
When at home we sit and find
Entertainment to our mind.

Oftentimes a mouse will stray
In the hero Pangur's way;
Oftentimes my keen thought set
Takes a meaning in its net.

'Gainst the wall he sets his eye
Full and fierce and sharp and sly;
'Gainst the wall of knowledge I
All my little wisdom try.

When a mouse darts from its den,
O how glad is Pangur then!
O what gladness do I prove
When I solve the doubts I love!

So in peace our task we ply,
Pangur Ban, my cat, and I;
In our arts we find our bliss,
I have mine and he has his.

Practice every day has made
Pangur perfect in his trade;
I get wisdom day and night
Turning darkness into light.
          --Translated from the Irish by Robin Flower


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 09 Jul 17 - 12:51 PM

It is never accurate to define people by a career.

However Rap's talent has inspired me to invent a new reality show.
Gladiator: American Librarian.

The shooting competition is from sliding ladders on tall stacks.
The beat the google clock competition is one of the most challenging.
The swimsuit competition is very popular.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Jul 17 - 12:17 PM

Rap's finely tuned search skills are the mark of a truly great plagiarist. It's so much easier to steal someone else's words if one is adept at finding them.

Remember the Plagiarists' Motto: "Don't create! Locate! Then, appropriate!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Jul 17 - 10:55 AM

Mammoth Cave in Kentucky was mined for bat guano to make gun powder as far back as the War of 1812.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 08 Jul 17 - 11:41 PM

1776 In the revolutionary war John Adams' wife wrote that she led a women's piss brigade for gunpowder.
I had no idea it took so long to make back then.

I don't know if librarians have proprietary secrets but how did you find that poem? I believe you may have raised search skills to a performance art of virtuosity, or at least the illusion, which is of course the same thing to an audience.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jul 17 - 10:42 PM

Real song from the CSA. Haralson was designated to collect chamber lye from the ladies of Selma, Alabama to use in making KNO3 for the Confederate troops. Sung to the tune of "O Tannenbaum" or "Maryland, My Maryland" (your choice).

John Haralson! John Haralson!
You are a funny creature;
You've given to this cruel war
A new and curious feature.
You'd have us think, while every man
Was born to be a fighter,
The women, bless the pretty dears
Should save their pee for nitre.

John Haralson! John Haralson!
Where did you get the notion
To send barrels around our street
To fill them with that lotion?
We thought the girls work enough
With making shirts and kissing:
But now you put the lovely dears
To patriotic pissing.

John Haralson! John Haralson!
Pray do invent neater
And a somewhat less immodest way
Of making your saltpetre.
The thing is so very odd,
Gunpowder like and cranky,
That when a woman lifts her skirt
She shoots another Yankee!

They say there is a subtle smell
That lingers in the powder;
That when the smoke grows thicker,
And the din of the battle louder
That there is found to this compound
One serious objection;
A soldier can not sniff it
Without having an erection.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Jul 17 - 10:34 PM

Wickedpedia sayeth:

The earliest known complete purification process for potassium nitrate was outlined in 1270 by the chemist and engineer Hasan al-Rammah of Syria in his book al-Furusiyya wa al-Manasib al-Harbiyya (The Book of Military Horsemanship and Ingenious War Devices). In this book, al-Rammah describes first the purification of barud (crude saltpeter mineral) by boiling it with minimal water and using only the hot solution, then the use of potassium carbonate (in the form of wood ashes) to remove calcium and magnesium by precipitation of their carbonates from this solution, leaving a solution of purified potassium nitrate, which could then be dried.[15] This was used for the manufacture of gunpowder and explosive devices. The terminology used by al-Rammah indicated a Chinese origin for the gunpowder weapons about which he wrote.[16]

At least as far back as 1845, Chilean saltpeter deposits were exploited in Chile and California, USA.

A major natural source of potassium nitrate was the deposits crystallizing from cave walls and the accumulations of bat guano in caves.[17] Extraction is accomplished by immersing the guano in water for a day, filtering, and harvesting the crystals in the filtered water. Traditionally, guano was the source used in Laos for the manufacture of gunpowder for Bang Fai rockets...

In the process of food preservation, potassium nitrate has been a common ingredient of salted meat since the Middle Ages,[22] but its use has been mostly discontinued because of inconsistent results compared to more modern nitrate and nitrite compounds. Even so, saltpeter is still used in some food applications, such as charcuterie and the brine used to make corned beef.[23] When used as a food additive in the European Union,[24] the compound is referred to as E252; it is also approved for use as a food additive in the USA[25] and Australia and New Zealand[26] (where it is listed under its INS number 252).[3] Although nitrate salts have been suspected of producing the carcinogen nitrosamine, both sodium and potassium nitrates and nitrites have been added to meats in the US since 1925, and nitrates and nitrites have not been removed from preserved meat products because nitrite and nitrate inhibits the germination of C. botulinum endospores, and thus prevents botulism form bacterial toxin that may otherwise be produced in certain preserved meat products.[27][28]

In West African cuisine, potassium nitrate (saltpetre) is widely used as a thickening agent in soups and stews such as okra soup[29] and isi ewu. It is also used to soften food and reduce cooking time when boiling beans and tough meat. Saltpetre is also an essential ingredient in making special porridges, such as kunun kanwa[30] literally translated from the Hausa language as 'saltpetre porridge'. In the Shetland Islands (UK) it is used in the curing of mutton to make "reestit" mutton, a local delicacy.


Which, when my brothers found out that sodium and/or potassium nitrate were in the hot dogs we ate gave rise to the idea of taking a raw hot dog and sticking fuse in it. "Stand back, I'm gonna light the hot dog now!"


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Subject: RE: Smother all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 08 Jul 17 - 08:03 PM

The French recipe for the manufacture of salt peter and niter may have been featured #1 because the French palette was already gourmet trained and cultured for shit and piss tasting purposes. It seems to me it has to be an acquired taste. The rest of the story may even include using unwashed French Prostitutes for taste training purposes.
More historical research may prove quite interesting, such as the trials and tribulations of the very first guy to make salt peter and exactly how he discovered its volatile nature. Like I said it could be interesting shit.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Jul 17 - 09:15 AM

That's not chicken shit, that's bat shit, and bat shit is a whole lot crazier than chicken shit. Just typing the words affirms that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jul 17 - 09:37 PM

Bee-Dubya-Ell, read this. It will tell you what to do with your chicken shit!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Jul 17 - 08:31 PM

Hi, Mom!

I'm sure you've heard someone exclaim, "I really don't need this shit!" Maybe you've even done so yourself.

Well, is there someone somewhere who really does need this shit? Can you let me know who he is so that next time I really don't need this shit I can call him and he can come take it off my hands?

Also, is the problem just with this shit, or with shit in general? Is there some other sort of shit that may be more acceptable than this shit? Maybe even a type of shit that someone really does need?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Jul 17 - 12:58 PM

I have never read poetry on an NPR station, though I have performed a few times as part of a couple of bands. I once agreed to play some mellow improvised hammer dulcimer stuff while some guy read his poetry, but I was drunk when I struck the agreement and, when I sobered up, I remembered that I don't do mellow improvised hammer dulcimer stuff, only fast fiddle tunes. Somehow, playing "Liberty" or "Forked Deer" while someone read a poem about death and destruction didn't seem like a really good idea, so I called in sick and the station recruited a flute player from the university's music department.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 07 Jul 17 - 11:56 AM

Not to brag but my page is longer than yours and she never fell off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Jul 17 - 11:36 AM

I thought I caught her yesterday evening - the post must not have taken. And it the 'cat was offline for a little while. Perhaps the intention was trumped by the lack of connectivity.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 07 Jul 17 - 11:29 AM

Lyrical overwhelming laugh (Lol) Pat. Trains girls AND gags. Better than petticoat junction but dark.

however

A turn of phrase by Amos can be just two words long but I remember them forever in a colored context. He sure knows how to naturally connect with dyslexic synthetes. &^}
Example: tendril of consciousness
synthesisia translation - (deep blue light greeny green)

Thomas Wolfe once wrote 'living tendril' - not as good as Amos'.

There was another who had a similar talent but with four letter words and name. He specialized in reds and yellows.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Jul 17 - 09:37 AM

MOM FELL OFF THE PAGE! FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER (AS FAR AS I KNOW) MOM FELL OFF THE PAGE!

I administered first aid, and the EMTs* took her to the horsespittle in an ambulance. She is in the ICU, but can receive visitors. A bottle of bourbon hidden in a gift of chocolates would not be unappreciated, she told me.



*Emergency Markup Technicians.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Jul 17 - 09:14 AM

Here's one, Donuel!

Through the mighty Sawtooth Mountains
Came an UP passenger train
The hoboes tried to ride her
But alas! 'twas all in vain!

The conductor took the tickets
And he counted every soul;
The engineer looked straight ahead
And the fireman shoveled coal.

Now, the fireman was a cowboy
But do not think it strange:
He could make more money shoveling coal
Than riding on the range.

And though he was a fireman
And although he had to sweat
He still remained a western guy
And he kept his lariat.

The train was way behind time
And the passengers all were wild,
When on that track a-sudden
There strolled a little child.

Her golden hair in ringlets
Was a-streamin' down her back.
She little knew of her danger great
As she strolled along the track.

"My God!" the hog head shouted
As he slammed on all the brakes
"I'll never stop this train in time
'Cause I ain't got what it takes"

"O Heaven help that wee tot!"
He cried in accents wild.
"Can nothing stop this UP train
And save that little child?"

Then up sprang the cowboy fireman,
And a gallant lad was he,
"Now I will save that baby
If I wreck the whole UP"

He climbed upon the running board
With tears his eyes were wet
And in his hand, our hero brave
Had his trusty lariat.

He dropped his loop around a pole
That stood beside the track
And tied the other end of it
Around the big smokestack.

He jerked the train right off the rails
And caused an awful wreck
And our hero lay there in a ditch
With the engine on his neck.

Oh we will all remember
That forty-fifth of May
For many brave and gallant hearts
Were filled with fear that day.

They buried that brave fireman
Where the prairie winds blow wild.
He killed two hundred passengers
But, Thank God, he saved the child!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 06 Jul 17 - 08:17 AM

Amos if there is an epic poem of yours you would like to reprise today would it possibly be about the horse, the train, the lady?

Your expression of the beautiful struggle is exciting, suspenseful and up lifting.

The villainous forces of nature, man or machine have a well deserved enemy named Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Jul 17 - 08:57 PM

But it's farthest away!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Jul 17 - 08:39 PM

The angle.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Jul 17 - 07:40 PM

If the sun is at aphelion, why is it so hot?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Jul 17 - 08:06 PM

...as good as anything they'd ever had in their spoken word series.

NPR station, I assume.

When you are filthy rich and filthy famous can I say "I knew him when..."?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Jul 17 - 06:14 PM

Keep them fingers crossed, brothers and sisters of Mom's hallowed halls. Remember--anything is possible. And this too shall pass. And ya never know. And different day, S.O.S. And caetera.

I was on the radio here the other day for half an hour--a brief dissertation on poetry and a couple of poems and a song. The producer was really delighted with it. Tole me later it was as good as anything they'd ever had in their spoken word series. So, way kewl.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Jul 17 - 03:51 PM

I'm hoping that putz in the White House doesn't decide to send nuclear fireworks in the general director of North Korea today. Hopefully someone in the chain of command would stop him in his tracks.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Jul 17 - 10:09 AM

Lordy! Mom's been playing with fireworks again! This time she put them on You Tube and fibbed about where she did it!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Jul 17 - 09:35 PM

Mars is simply the industry code word for Bangkok. Alex Jones is probably doing a preposterous Mars child sex distraction story to minimize and confuse the long standing story of Trump reportedly attending a pedophilia flight with an associate famous for bringing kids on board for immoral purposes. Madness has a method.

The actual Mars is not just unbreathable, it stinks to high heaven. The Hydrogen sulfide in the thin near pressureless atmosphere seeps into any airlock system and renders a horrible fart stench. They don't advertise the fact that the whole planet stinks really bad. Space Febreze comes in tiny squares that attach to air vents and really does work - in simulations.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Jul 17 - 09:02 PM

My little weather station here in my lair has a future forecast feature. Right now it's predicting rain. Well, yes, it probably will rain sometime in the future. It's kinda like my "Might snow today" -- either it will or it won't. I can pree-dick weather! I'm a prophet!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 03 Jul 17 - 11:11 AM

Amos, good thing you got back home safe,
before Maine got all those tornadoes in a single day.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Jul 17 - 10:48 AM

NASA has publicly announced that, contrary to the opinion expressed by some yo-yo on Alex Jones' Infowars program, there are no child sex slaves on Mars.

This is good news and bad news.

Good news because there are no child sex slaves on Mars.

Bad news because, if one is destined to be a child sex slave, Mars would be a pretty good place to do it. Since there are no adult humans on Mars, there'd be nobody to be a sex slave for! Martian child sex slaves wouldn't have to ply their trade at all, but would be free to grow up to be normal well-adjusted human beings. Well, as well-adjusted as one could be living on a planet with no breathable air, no liquid water, and an atmosphere that does almost zilch to filter out deadly radiation. Still, it probably beats Bangkok.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Jul 17 - 09:41 AM

We are well underway to make that offending mosquito species extinct via gene replacement weapons. It didn't take long for CRISPR to go from healing discovery to weapon.

Coming soon: The Trump Truth Vaccine.
It will make all objective facts fake and advance the clenched fist of Trump Tweet Truth.

free gifts with every oral vaccine !
coupon for 10% off ammunition and bonus booklet, Who When and How to attack 'Swamp Monsters' vol. 1.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Jul 17 - 08:52 PM

Okay, how about your Prez for your PM? I'll toss in a genuine Barlow knife.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Jul 17 - 01:31 PM

Pretty puleeeze . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 02 Jul 17 - 11:33 AM

Rap... no.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Jul 17 - 10:22 AM

Hi, Mom!

I've heard that the Aedes aegypti mosquito which carries the Zika virus can lay its eggs in as little water as what's contained in a bottle cap. Well then, it seems pretty obvious to me that the key to defeating the Zika virus is to eliminate bottle caps! So, next time you shoplift a bottle of booze, make sure it has a cork instead of a screw-cap. Do your part for public health!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jul 17 - 05:28 PM

Swap your PM for our Prez, gnu.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 01 Jul 17 - 10:33 AM

Well, it's Dominion Day. I saw our Prime Asshole chatting with Bonnie Prince Chuck on the TV at Mum's after I finished some window washing, scrubbing, vacuuming, and such. Similar chaps. Both born with a silver spoon up their ass. But, at least Chuck can't fuck up an entire country with lies and broken promises. I'd write a poem about Mini-Me Harper but I can't think of anything to rhyme with &*@$#%^*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Big celebrations are planned in NB.ca for July 4th. Well, for close to 4000 NBers. OTOH, about 55,000 NBers will be cryin' in their beer. Moose draw results will be available IF the gubmint doesn't screw up the draw somehow. I am sure they have someone working on it.


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