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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 08 Feb 05 - 09:24 AM
Acme 08 Feb 05 - 12:33 AM
Rapparee 07 Feb 05 - 10:32 PM
khandu 07 Feb 05 - 09:55 PM
Rapparee 07 Feb 05 - 08:40 PM
Bunnahabhain 07 Feb 05 - 06:56 PM
Amos 07 Feb 05 - 04:34 PM
GUEST,heric 07 Feb 05 - 04:13 PM
GUEST,MMario 07 Feb 05 - 03:49 PM
Teresa 07 Feb 05 - 03:45 PM
GUEST,MMario 07 Feb 05 - 03:38 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 07 Feb 05 - 03:33 PM
GUEST,MMario 07 Feb 05 - 03:32 PM
Acme 07 Feb 05 - 03:31 PM
Teresa 07 Feb 05 - 03:28 PM
Rapparee 07 Feb 05 - 03:19 PM
GUEST,MMario 07 Feb 05 - 03:11 PM
GUEST,MMario 07 Feb 05 - 03:09 PM
Amos 07 Feb 05 - 03:01 PM
GUEST,MMario 07 Feb 05 - 01:50 PM
Rapparee 07 Feb 05 - 01:30 PM
GUEST,heric 07 Feb 05 - 11:58 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 07 Feb 05 - 11:27 AM
Amos 07 Feb 05 - 10:56 AM
Acme 07 Feb 05 - 10:52 AM
GUEST,heric 07 Feb 05 - 10:47 AM
Acme 07 Feb 05 - 10:34 AM
Acme 07 Feb 05 - 10:33 AM
Acme 07 Feb 05 - 10:32 AM
GUEST,MMario 07 Feb 05 - 10:32 AM
Acme 07 Feb 05 - 10:30 AM
Amos 07 Feb 05 - 10:23 AM
GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell 07 Feb 05 - 09:50 AM
GUEST,Rapaire 07 Feb 05 - 09:18 AM
Teresa 07 Feb 05 - 03:11 AM
Teresa 07 Feb 05 - 02:19 AM
Layah 07 Feb 05 - 12:02 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Feb 05 - 11:44 PM
Rapparee 06 Feb 05 - 11:24 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Feb 05 - 10:40 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Feb 05 - 10:26 PM
Layah 06 Feb 05 - 10:24 PM
khandu 06 Feb 05 - 10:17 PM
Layah 06 Feb 05 - 10:16 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Feb 05 - 10:12 PM
khandu 06 Feb 05 - 10:12 PM
Layah 06 Feb 05 - 10:09 PM
Bunnahabhain 06 Feb 05 - 10:08 PM
khandu 06 Feb 05 - 10:03 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Feb 05 - 09:59 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 05 - 09:24 AM

And "hard drive," too.

But! After long and difficult work, I have managed to track down a picture not only of Khandu's head, but of Bee-Dubya's golf cart (Khandu's is the second photo).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Feb 05 - 12:33 AM

Gives new meaning to the term "laptop."

;-D


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:32 PM

Khandu has a computer and Internet connection by his toilet?? And people call me geeky????


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 09:55 PM

Teresa, you are correct..we have met formerly & formally, but that was another place & and another time. Tony Joe White said that but he wasn't talking about you & me. No, T.J. was speaking of Willie & Laura Mae, who do indeed live in a parallel omniverse! Thanks for the homage, however. I greatly enjoy every drop of homage I get!

Layah, to begin the process of spending time in a random day in your past, you must spend an inordinate amount of time at MOAB. This has a similar effect upon the head as does an "ASCID" (AKA "Witches Cradle") only more so, with only half the carbs!

heric, all too well I remember your first post to MOAB. It made me question my existence, until I finally realized that I am, therefore I think, I think. All this came to me as I was sitting on the toilet, straining over your enigmatic post. The fact that you have never been heard from since that first post proves that you were sent from the Great "Out-there"! A Statue is being built upon the site of your visitation.

Oh, I smell the ...gotta go!!

k


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 08:40 PM

Yeah! Bring back Lake Bonneville! Great fishing, great water-skiing, great all-around fun!! And Lake Agassiz, too! I used to go surfing there, and it was all time!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 06:56 PM

By the way, Bunn, what is the significance of "Bunnahabhain"? Is it your real name? The name of a demon of whom you are extremely fond? The name of a nearby hill where restless spirits roam the night?

Actually a bay, on Islay, where the spirits are restlessly distilled, and tend to roam the night in hip flasks...

And not far from where Harris tweed comes from, which being in the outer Hebredies, definitly counts as another dimension, at the very least.

Bring back lake Bonneville!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 04:34 PM

The Salton Sea is indeed a very salty inland sea, but smaller than the Mormon's own Great Salt Lake.

It is amusing to swim in the Great Salt Lake as long as you keep your eyes from splash. You tend to bob on the surface more than you expect.

I haven't tried the Salton Sea which is just north of the Sea or Cortez and was once connected to it. In fact legend has it there is a large Spanish galleon buried in the sand near the Salton Sea, which sailed up from the Manila trade route and was cut off by an earthquake which sealed off the North end, leaving the Salton Sea separate from the Sea of Cortez.

I wasn't there at the time, but a friends says he has seen the spars of her sticking out of the sand.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,heric
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 04:13 PM

I went down to the welfare to git myself some grits and such
but the lady smiled at me and said YOU AIN'T BEEN AROUND ENOUGH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:49 PM

and he did - which is why the bush was burning.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Teresa
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:45 PM

Oh forgive; I knew you were smarter'n that. :) I had a temporary brain short-circuit.

Skin is the most elastic natural material. I know, because God told Moses to tie his ass to a tree and walk forty miles. :-P

Teresa


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:38 PM

Teresa - I learned in school the oceans were salt and inland waterways are fresh.

Now you expect me to believe differently? ;)

(this is the MOAB thread.)

granted - I'm a little doubtful about the elastic Bison as well...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:33 PM

It means that they can be made "fully hardy" by incorporating a small amount of Viagra into their feeding mixture.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:32 PM

"half-hardy" usually means they will last a second year if you can keep them from freezing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:31 PM

They're attractive. Are you planning to plant some? (In the greenhouse, if nowhere else?)

As for heric's early post--since I didn't read all of the way back, I didn't see it. He hasn't been around often since then.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Teresa
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:28 PM

That sounds like fun, Rapaire. I prefer to do the trip with books and imagination. :)

Er, MMario, Salt Lake? and I believe there are many smaller lakes. and is there not a Salton Sea as well?

Teresa


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:19 PM

The genus Osteospermum belongs to the plant family Compositae (Asteraceae) or Daisy family. The plant originates from South Africa and is therefore also known under the common name 'African Daisy'.

The word Osteospermum comes from Greek 'osteon' (=bone) and Latin 'spermum' (=seed): bone seed. Osteospermums are half hardy perennials and will therefore not survive frost conditions. However, they can be propagated by cuttings or may be over-wintered in a greenhouse or conservatory.


What the heck does "half hardy mean?" Seems to me that they would be or they wouldn't be.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:11 PM

and no, that's not a rhetorical question.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:09 PM

Why would anyone name a flower osteospermum?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:01 PM

. Destined to flow by each other a thousand times yet, somehow, never to touch.


I'm sorry, Monsieur Rapaire, I imagined the part about the truck; I was speaking of the similarity of your relationship to Sorcha to the travels of Tweed and khandu as described by BeeDubyaEll.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 01:50 PM

y'know - just when you start believing him Rapaire throws something in that just fails the 'suspension of disbelief" test.

a salt sea in the middle of the country - yeah - right. Sure. Piping the fumes from the car back into the drivers seat, right?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 01:30 PM

Amos, I drove myself out to Idaho in a 1999 Honda Civic LX. I was not shipped out in a big truck, although my furniture, etc. followed later in one. Neither was my wife shipped out, but drove herself in a 1993 Honda Accord LX (which she later drove back East and sold to our graduate-school-bound niece).

During my Journey West I stopped at several places and saw many wonderous things: Sidney, Nebraska; a truck stop outside Cheyenne, Wyoming (where I missed meeting the wonderous Sorcha by fifteen miles); a bunch of boys flying around fighting a pirate with a hook; Cabela's Sporting Goods; a mountain made of glass; a salt sea in the middle of the country; mountains made of rocks; antelope; coyotes; herds of bison that stretched as far as the eye can see; longs lines of covered wagons being drawn westward by teams of oxen; amber waves of grain; and even assorted Indians, both the kinds that wear saris and the kinds that wear jeans.

My wife will usually vouch for the truth of what I say.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,heric
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 11:58 AM

Those formative classics are currently being assembled into an anthology to be titled "Challenges: Prose Poetry of the Young Champion," self published by Bohners Press.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 11:27 AM

Actually, SRS, heric posted to the MOAB on its first evening of existence:

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST, heric - PM
Date: 05 May 03 - 08:56 PM

I object that the brown-shirt management of this site allows, unmolested, this implicit but unmistakable bashing of the transgenderedly challenged. They are NOT all marimba players as you well know and I will not stand idly by while . . . I QUIT


To which khandu replied:

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu - PM
Date: 05 May 03 - 09:00 PM

Uh...what the hell did heric just say???

k


The exchange has gone down in MOAB history as a prime example of "Utterly Meaningless Gibberish" (or "WTF" for short) Unfortunately, heric's subsequent posts have been rare until recently. His computer access was extremely curtailed after that incident with the canary and the begonia. It's taken him a while to convince the staff that the new meds are working well enough that he should be allowed into the computer room unsupervised.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:56 AM

Heric:

SRSbeat you fair and square. Now you must dine on raven.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:52 AM

I've posted plenty of poetry in days past. You're a newbie to this thread or you'd know that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,heric
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:47 AM

That was good Stilly, but you've got to work on your poetry. And remember, a champion will prefer to let slots *98 and *99 pass. Remember: Float like a butterfly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:34 AM

Darned slow DSL today.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:33 AM

Hang in there, Leo!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:32 AM

Are you guys paying attention? I am not a football fan, but I do know about blocking the offensive action of a "double-ought" crasher. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:32 AM

or go to you local Library and hang in the stacks after hours. Fastest route to an alternate universe that exists.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:30 AM

Doesn't have to happen that way, though. I've made lots of cross-country trips in my pickemup truck.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 10:23 AM

Rapaire had a similar adventure during his move from Never-Never Land to Idaho in a big truck.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 09:50 AM

Slight correction, Rapaire. While Tweed and Khandu did in fact go off on such a journey, they didn't exactly do it together. Tweed's point of embarkation was Tweedsburg, located in the wilds of Palm Beach County while khandu set out from the Royal Palace in Tupelo, otherwise known as Uncle Tink's Place. They arrived at their mutual destination a couple of miliseconds apart, but in that particular universe time moves so slowly that a milisecond is like a week in our own universe. Tweed, who arrived first, quickly ran out of Newport Lights and had to find a Seven-Eleven to buy more. Khandu arrived while Tweed was out scoring smokes and hung around until he was overtaken by a Big Mac attack and had to hie to the nearest MacDonalds. Needless to say, Tweed arrived back at the Destination Point while khandu was out. This type of thing went on for several more miliseconds with them continually missing each other for one reason or another until they finally both said "Fuck it!" and went back home.

Tweed and khandu... Like two turds in the same sewer... Destined to flow by each other a thousand times yet, somehow, never to touch.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 09:18 AM

Yes, Teresa, there CAN be more than one, but to get to them you would have to travel into parallel universes. Such travel is very, very complicated and difficult and should not be undertaken without proper equipment and training.

The best way is to gird your loins with a gladius, a targe, a complete set of bagpipes (the big Scottish war pipes are best), a parfleche containing dried corn, dried meat and/or fish and/or berries, warm clothing, at least 10 liters of water or other drink of your choice, several feet of logging chain, a lariat, two or three bodhrans, and a copy of the complete writings of either Paul Dirac or Ted Gissell.

Properly outfitted, you must find then find a rabbit warren, as the tunnels in bunny havens are the easiest (and only non-lethal) way to journey to these other universes (the others involve black holes, blue event horizons, and stuff like those). Crawl through the bunny tunnels (old-time MOABites call them "bunny tunnies"), following every twist and turn, and eventually you will see a White Rabbit chasing a pre-pubescent girl. Follow them, and after you pass through the place where The King is sleeping with Sir Francis Drake's drum, turn left and continue straight on until morning. And there you'll be.

Tweed and Khandu went off on such a journey together, and they only made it part-way back. That's why they're not around here as much as they used to be -- they're only partly with us.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Teresa
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 03:11 AM

Woops, I forgot to pay homage to the king of BS ... hello khandu! We've met formally and formerly on this very thread, but it was close to a year back, or was that eons? :) Some other parallel MOAB (can there be more than one?)

Teresa


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Teresa
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 02:19 AM

Yeah, Rapaire, he did it; I saw him hit you. I mean ... um, I heard the rich voice and mellifluous strains and smelled the aromatic breezes of BS, I did, and I said to myself "Hey, 'at 'air's bee-dubya; yep,'at's right." :)

Teresa


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Layah
Date: 07 Feb 05 - 12:02 AM

You people disgust me. You read bunny haven and immediately assume the worst. It could be a totally innocent love of pet bunnies. Besides which, it obviously comes from Yiddish, meaning somebody who has buns. I can just see you all about to misinterpret that one too. Well in Yiddish the word bun does not have any other meaning, so it won't work. We're obviously talking about bread products here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 11:44 PM

I apologize. I read a few pages of Watership Down and a loud voice asked me "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU READING THIS SHIT FOR?" I told the loud voice that I wasn't really sure, but that he shouldn't holler in libraries. That made him angry and he snatched the book from my hand and threw it out the window. It landed on top of a university police car with two university policepeople in it and I thought it would be better to forget about the book than to try to explain to them how it got on top of the cop car.

From that day on, I figured that if the power that created the universe wanted me to read Watership Down he/she/it would drop a copy out of the sky and have it land on top of my own car, but it hasn't happened yet.

But it's nice to know that the guy who wrote the book named a character after a coffee maker.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 11:24 PM

Bee-Dubya, you're embarassing us and Mom. Surely you've read Watership Down, haven't you? That's about a haven for rabbits -- a bunny haven. You know very well from your studies of the Q-Celtic languages that "Bunnahabhain" is Elderich Cornish for "Bunny Haven." Obviously, Bunn has a "thing" for rabbits. And it would be rude, not to mention possibly disgusting, to inquire further. Bunn has never asked about you and pot, hmmmmmmmmm?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:40 PM

By the way, Bunn, what is the significance of "Bunnahabhain"? Is it your real name? The name of a demon of whom you are extremely fond? The name of a nearby hill where restless spirits roam the night?

I like the short form, BUNN because it makes good coffee.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:26 PM

Bunn - Groundhog Day, Feb. 2nd, is a US pseudo-holiday. It's the day when the groundhog supposedly comes out of his hibernation burrow and looks around. Then if he sees his shadow winter's supposed to be almost over and if he doesn't see his shadow we're all gonna die or some such horseshit. Anyway, there was a movie made several years ago in which a television newsperson, played by Bill Murray, went to a town where they have a Groundhog Day celebration, got trapped in a timewarp, and lived the same day, Groundhog Day, over and over again.

Your post reminded me of the timewarp idea and since Groundhog Day was just a few days ago... But I forgot you're across the pond.

They don't have Hedgehog Day over there, do they?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Layah
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:24 PM

Hello khandu, it's nice to meet you to. That's not any groundhog day tradition I've ever practiced. How do you go about spending time in a random day in the past? I think that would be useful thing to know. I don't like today, but last month sometime would be really nice to spend some time in...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:17 PM

Layah, Hello...we have never met. I am quite happy to meet you.
Bunn, Hello...we have never met. I am quite happy to meet you, also!

And on Groundhog Day, we spend at least one full hour spending time in a random day in our past. That is to what bee-dub refers!

k


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Layah
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:16 PM

Dang length limit. Hasn't tried to start a thread before. It would require so much abbreviation as to become uniteligible.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:12 PM

Good idea Layah! If you can figure out how to squeeze all that into the subject window, go for it!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:12 PM

Bunn, Groundhog Day is Feb. 8.
It is a long held US custom to either eat or mate with a Groundhog on trhis day!

We are looking forward to it... BTW, we seldom eat them!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Layah
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:09 PM

I haven't posted to the "Who Hasn't posted to the Mother of All Bullshit Thread?". Perhaps we need a new thread "Who hasn't posted to the who hasn't posted to the MOther of All BS Thred?"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:08 PM

Groundhog day? Should I know something about it? If so, someone please, enlighten me on US folklore. If however, if it's Bee-dubya-ell twisted imagination, don't tell me...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 10:03 PM

Who hasn't posted to the "Who Hasn't posted to the Mother of All Bullshit Thread?"?

I have not.

k


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 05 - 09:59 PM

Groundhog Day's over, Bunn.


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