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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 20 Jun 03 - 10:51 AM
Little Hawk 20 Jun 03 - 09:25 AM
Little Hawk 19 Jun 03 - 09:03 PM
Tweed 19 Jun 03 - 07:20 PM
Rapparee 19 Jun 03 - 05:16 PM
Little Hawk 19 Jun 03 - 01:24 PM
Rapparee 19 Jun 03 - 12:15 PM
Amos 19 Jun 03 - 08:46 AM
Rapparee 19 Jun 03 - 08:21 AM
Tweed 18 Jun 03 - 11:58 PM
Amos 18 Jun 03 - 11:43 PM
Little Hawk 18 Jun 03 - 10:52 PM
Tweed 18 Jun 03 - 07:35 PM
CarolC 18 Jun 03 - 11:21 AM
Little Hawk 18 Jun 03 - 11:02 AM
Tweed 18 Jun 03 - 06:09 AM
Little Hawk 18 Jun 03 - 01:26 AM
Rustic Rebel 17 Jun 03 - 10:45 PM
Amos 17 Jun 03 - 09:08 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Jun 03 - 08:42 PM
Amos 17 Jun 03 - 08:32 PM
Tweed 17 Jun 03 - 07:52 PM
GUEST,Lil' Missy Fookedup 17 Jun 03 - 07:11 PM
Little Hawk 17 Jun 03 - 06:32 PM
GUEST,Debby Earl (Freds) 17 Jun 03 - 12:28 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Jun 03 - 10:08 AM
Amos 17 Jun 03 - 09:25 AM
CarolC 16 Jun 03 - 11:48 PM
Mrs.Duck 14 Jun 03 - 01:55 PM
GUEST,freds 14 Jun 03 - 12:37 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 Jun 03 - 01:05 AM
Amos 12 Jun 03 - 09:28 PM
GUEST,freds 12 Jun 03 - 08:54 PM
Tweed 12 Jun 03 - 12:10 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Jun 03 - 11:45 PM
Amos 11 Jun 03 - 10:48 PM
GUEST,freds 11 Jun 03 - 10:46 PM
Rustic Rebel 11 Jun 03 - 10:17 PM
Amos 11 Jun 03 - 09:56 PM
Rustic Rebel 11 Jun 03 - 09:33 PM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 03 - 01:56 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Jun 03 - 11:32 AM
CarolC 11 Jun 03 - 11:23 AM
Little Hawk 11 Jun 03 - 02:43 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Jun 03 - 12:21 AM
CarolC 10 Jun 03 - 10:19 PM
GUEST,freds 10 Jun 03 - 09:48 PM
GUEST,Lil' Missy Fookedup 10 Jun 03 - 09:12 PM
GUEST,Shiney Knause 10 Jun 03 - 05:10 PM
Little Hawk 10 Jun 03 - 01:10 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Jun 03 - 10:51 AM

"The Twain-Tritt Trenton Twitty Tribute Tour."

You have entirely too much time on your hands!!! ROFLMAO!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Jun 03 - 09:25 AM

Good morning!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Jun 03 - 09:03 PM

Oh, He will, Tweed. He will.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 19 Jun 03 - 07:20 PM

LH,
I am consumed wif terror az I habv only just now witnessed a television commercial message for a tooth whitening system and the woman falls asleep and dreams she is (apparently become) a tooth in a line of other human/tooth items and all are doing a Riverdance sorta thing. There beside her is none other than

Bill Shatner

doing a irish jig of sorts wif no lines to say, he emotes whiteness and smiles the coy Shatner smile. There was no Shania Twain in the line anywhere. I am wondering now if Crest toothpaste has been bought by a Canadian firm..
I need to go lay down and cancel the cable. It's too much....it's...it's...all BS. MOAB has spread like SARS. Worst of all, KingKhandu haz taken a cyberdump and left the building.
May God hab mercy on us all.
Yerz,
Tweed


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jun 03 - 05:16 PM

Did you know that Shania Twain and Travis Tritt are doing a tour together? Yup. Not quite a tour, really more of an appreciation of the work of Conway Twitty -- they'll be in New Jersey, in fact.

It is, of course, called "The Twain-Tritt Trenton Twitty Tribute Tour."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Jun 03 - 01:24 PM

Tweed - No, no, it's the OTHER way around...first William Shatner and THEN Shania Twain. That is the process of natural evolution in Canada. Impressive, eh?

Amos, that was a truly brilliant comment! Indeed, we are all two-dimensional representations of the real being we truly are. Marvelous! Life is the biggest stage play of all time, and this thread is contributing magnificently to the comic aspects of the play.

I wish I had a cardboard replica of George Bush here. I would first of all give it a mighty kick in the nuts, then throw tomatoes at it, and then probably hang it in effigy. Fun, fun, fun... It would be neat to add horns and vampire fangs to as well.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jun 03 - 12:15 PM

Did I ever tell you folks about the dachshund I had that was in an accident and ended up folded like a Mobius strip?







I thought not.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Jun 03 - 08:46 AM

Mebbe she could -- they're not hard to make (fold once and join ends!). But could she explain it?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Jun 03 - 08:21 AM

Being a cardboard two-dimensional representation of myself, I often find that I stand near the three- (and sometime more) dimensionsal me. I have many pictures of me with my arm around my shoulder or drinking a beer with myself, William Shatner, Elvis, and Shania Twain. The worst two-dimensional representation I know George W. Bush, who's a two-faced Mobius strip. (A Mobius strip is NOT something performed in a sleazy theatre, but a topological phenomenon. Shania Twain does not do a Mobius strip, although I'm certain she could make one.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 11:58 PM

Liddle Harg, I confess I yam salivating while thinking about a cardboard likeness of Shania Twain. How a nation could produce her and then produce Shatner is beyond me. What a divers country you live in.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 11:43 PM

Carol:

Now, now, don't take it personally. Everybody is a life-like two dimensional representation of a real person. Even mon chère Leedle Hack! Maybe not cardboard, but in the bigger picture, there's precious little distinction to be made between wet meat and dry carboard. They're both carbon-oxygen complications, after all.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 10:52 PM

I know a guy who salivates when he stands next to cardboard likenesses of Shania Twain...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 07:35 PM

CarolC, Queen of Sailors:
Please pay no attention to the doddering old folky known as Beedub the Knower of More Than a Couple o'things. He wishes he could have stood so close to a cardboard Elvis. He is living in Flamabama and has developed the quirks that go with that backward nation.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 11:21 AM

I don't know why you think my new friends are "life-sized two-dimensional cardboard representations of well-known people", Bee-dubya-ell. Of all the nerve. I don't talk about your friends that way.

Glad you liked the pictures, Amos.

Cool, LH. PM on the way.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 11:02 AM

That's nothing, Tweed. I have even been encountered by non-physical entities in the Astral worlds regarding this thread. It is cosmic and all-embracing (just like the sexual life of Elvis).

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 06:09 AM

Liddle Harg, I find that utterly astonishing! I have been confronted in the physical world by people who have said the same thing about this steaming heap of cowpat. MOAB is taking on Beatles-like mystique it seems and King Khandu would be proud I'm sure. I have tried to re-read the entire thread but found I soon drifted into a sort of catatonic trance state. I remained in that condition so long, I awoke to discover a family of Ruby-throats had nested in my hair. They are vicious birds and fairly territorial and have successfully avoided the baseball bat, always zipping clear at the last millisecond leaving me with a cluster of lumps on my pore skullbone. I've decided to give up on the bat and will try spraying them with an industrial strenght insecticide instead and avoid further damage to myself.

Unfortunately I am unable to locate this code, or anything resembling sentient thought processes here but I am summat slow and now even more thick headed due to these pesky hummers.

Yerz,
Tweed
Focked Duck de Mizippi


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Jun 03 - 01:26 AM

I just reread this entire thread with great care and discovered to my utter amazement that it is a code, which when decyphered, provides the entire sexual history of Elvis Presley in complete detail. It's astonishing, to say the least, and quite enlightening. I'm surprised he didn't die sooner. I do not intend to reveal my method of breaking the code, because I would not want others to suffer as I have and possibly lose their sanity in the process.

Sometimes one can know a little too much...

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 10:45 PM

Where the hell have I been? Oh no I mean where has Kandu been! Last thing I know he was leaping out of here in a loin cloth with a 'God Bless Mississippi' tie on. Then he ended up in a pot of stew and haven't heard from him since. Is he on a mission?
Hey Little Pissy Missy, I did acknowledge you when I was talking about adding corn to the stew but goodbye.

I have a story of sorts to tell about the band that we are forming.
First we play in less than 2 weeks at a small blues fest in N. Minnesota. Our name is 'B.T. and the Blues Bombers'. BT is on guitar, Geno on keyboard, JR on bass,Trev on drums and I'm playing harp and some rhythm guitar, and I'll be doing a couple solo songs that I wrote.
The story begins....
BT decided to name us the bombers because he says we bombed so bad the last time we played. I'm saying oh that's nice Bobby I'm out joining peace marches and now I'm a BOMBER!
To date we have only jammed together 3 times, and that doesn't include the whole band. I just asked Trev last week if he wanted to drum he says, "yes but I have to find my drums" Ok, so we have a drummer with no drums...Yet!
Geno on keyboards can play about four chords and a couple little riffs. I left him my keyboard to practice but I hear he is a little slow at it. Maybe next week he'll try to learn a C chord progression!
JR is a guitar player filling in on Bass for us. He's good though so I have faith, but I still haven't heard him on bass or for that matter jammed with him yet!
BT is good, we are doing most of his songs so he will have them down if no-one else will.
And that leads me to myself. Rusty, yeah you could call me that. I haven't done any jamming on the harp in almost a year. My lungs suck, my lips are cracked and I basically know how to suck and blow to get me through but I need work.

This is going to be a riot. (people throwing tomatos?) But you know what? I can't wait. I think I'm going to go up there and have a great time! With any motivation we'll get our shit together and jam these next two weeks more than once! Wish me luck huh?
Rustic the Blues BOMBER! (I think we need to change the name once we get discovered!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 09:08 PM

Ah, mon cher Leedle Hack, I must MOST heavily apolospew on your best shoes! It is too true what you say -- my vilification is worthy of yourself in every dimension!! Consider it restored with Deep, Brilliant Polish!! Permanently Protected!! Permeating Every Cavity!!! With Invisible Shield!! Not a Cough in a Car Load!! America is Asking You to....well, never mind.

I hereby restore to you my best Investive without let, hindrance, compromise or stammer in any degree.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 08:42 PM

I think Tweed's hittin' purty close to th' mark there, Missy. Mebbe if you wuz t' call yerself "Lil' Missy Fuppeduck" instead. There's lots of fupped ducks 'round here. In fact, Tweed iz th' "First Duck" which means he iz th' mos' fupped duck of all. Joe Offer iz jus' th' "Third Duck of Pelahatchee" which means he iz also fupped duck, but not az fupped duck az Tweed.

Bee etc. - Mongrel widda Generator inda Basement


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 08:32 PM

Wal. Missy, you -- like all your gender -- have a perfect and inalienable (but highly alien) right to have all the snit and vapour yore substitute heart desires, but it just stands tro common sense thet anyone posting to a thread that is OVER 540 posts long is jes' asking for a no-response. Suit your own snooty little self, pretty britches, but consider it might be a reflection of your own divine ignorance, and tell that to the folks over to Yahoo!

First Vowel


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 07:52 PM

Now, don't take this wrong Missy, but mebbe if you changed your handle to Queen o' Blues or Something you would be showered wif roses and Amos would lay himself in mud hole so you wouldn't get yore feet soiled az you lightly stepped on his head. Thar are many of us who ar summat fookedup and certainly is no high crime, but ya...mebbe a different handle for you...

Yerz,
Tweed


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Lil' Missy Fookedup
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 07:11 PM

Hey ya'all. I sees I am not a very welcomed people to this here community. Why I jus stopped in fer a hello and I gets me a big fat-ass nothin' I was a thinkin' yous were like my home town folks but I takes it all back. I'm feelin' abused and mistreated in a land that I don't belong so Ima goin to wander on out of here with my tail draggin' and my ass shaggin' and I'm a goin' to get my doggies on back to Yahoo chat where peoples treat ya right. That's a right I said YAHOO chat. I can be anyone I wants at YAHOO chat. I can be the queen o' blues over there and I gets respect. Ya all has seen the last O Lil' Missy round here I tell ya that much.The End of Lil' Missy Fookedup round here I swear it is. I ain't never comin' back ya hear.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 06:32 PM

Amos, you have deeply offended me! You wrote that...

"You are merely a FIGUREHEAD of turpitude, a silhouette, a mere signal of demoralization, and not its actual provenance, sir. I humbly withdraw my vilification."

Those are fighting words, Amos. I am no mere figurehead! I am a full-time director at the WSSBA! Utter and absolute BS is my business. I richly deserve your vilification and I DEMAND IT!!!!

If you are not willing to provide it, I shall be forced to demand satisfaction. Be assured that I am in deadly earnest when I say that. In Canada we don't get mad...we get irritated.

Carol - Yes, it would be nice to get together. PM me with your plans.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Debby Earl (Freds)
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 12:28 PM

Hey, Bee-dubya-ell! How you?

Y'all might think it odd that I'm writin' to ya like this, but I gotta odd sort of story to tell ya.

Seems like when ol' Bubba Bubba was down with the Blues, she went and infected me too. Foren ya know it, both of us realized that we were really just a couple of good ol' southerners at heart, and we went and changed ourselfs to be what we really are.

Anyway, ol' Bubba Bubba grew herself some long blonde har and got sort of big on top and curvy in the middle and somewhere got some of them bluejeans that look like they was poured on and a tee shirt top that says "Watchalookinatbub?" on it. She's done takin up singin' the blues and does a dang good job of it,too. Her hairs all piled up on toppa her head and she's caused several fights down at the truck stop, and not with her guitar playin', neither! She says she's gonna move to Memphis or mebbe Nashville soon and make some bucks.

Me, I jist growed into a six-four feller and I sorta tag along with Bubba Bubba, protectin' her and playing banjo, sometimes ukelele when she REALLY gets down and bluesy.

We turned ol' Khandu loose, not much the worse for wear, but when Bubba Bubba changed and became what's she's become, ol' Khandu looked mighty sick -- lower'n a snake's belly in a wagon rut, in fact. A starvin' snake, at that.

We told that Galactic Overlord to stick it, so he shouldn't be botherin' you anymore either. Bubba Bubba and me are gonna take to the road right soon, so iffen you see us, give a shout and we'll buy ya a beer. Not Budweiser, though -- maybe a Lone Star or somethin' even better.

Yer Friend,
Debbie Earl

PS: Do we have to do somethin' about our names? I'm makin' lots of new men friends, but I'm not sure I like 'em.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 10:08 AM

Dear Carol,

You seem to have developed a propensity toward having your picture taken in the company of life-sized two-dimensional cardboard representations of well-known people. First Shatner, now Elvis. Who's next? I know where ya can find Britney Spears and several NASCAR drivers if yer interested.


Dear debee erl,

If bubba bubba is still actin' weird and feelin' poorly you might consider a little side trip to southern Alabama. There are Fred's Pharmacies all over the place. I didn't know that there were enough freds in southern Alabama to need their own pharmacies, but there must be as they are rather large stores. It looks like bubba bubba's not the only one who finds southerners hard to digest.

BWL


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jun 03 - 09:25 AM

Nice photos, CC!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 16 Jun 03 - 11:48 PM

We got back from our trip to Tupelo Mississippi late last night. It was pretty cool. Lots of good music, and I spread my accordion addiction around a bit. We got some pictures. Here's one:

Me and Elvis and Elvis

Looks like one of our next trips will be to Dearborn Michigan. Hey LH, want to get together somewhere in Ontario while JtS and I are in your general area?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 14 Jun 03 - 01:55 PM

Que?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 14 Jun 03 - 12:37 PM

her debee erl agan bubba bubba stil duin bluz now sinin sant jams infermree wit kandu an blak snak mone wantz tu lern banju an gitar but haz to mani dijitz an keepz getin tangld in strins if bubba bubba diez me debee erl gona be sum pized of mabee et twed an beedubyael an brin mutcad don forevr becuz no bs


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Jun 03 - 01:05 AM

Amos,

Regarding your accusation that I am "the monger of degenerate abasement around here", I am sure that in some areas of the country people do keep generators in their basements, but, here in Florida, the water table is far too high for basements to be practical. We generally keep our generators in our garages. I'll let the mongrel part slide as it's more or less the truth. My family didn't exactly come over on The Mayflower.

Ree-gards

BWL aka Monger of Degenerate Abasement (MDA)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 03 - 09:28 PM

Little Hawk,

My apologies. All that invective should have been directed at this OTHER lowlife, BWL who know has taken on the color of a Southron and is ACTUALLY the monger of degenerate abasement around here.
You are merely a FIGUREHEAD of turpitude, a silhouette, a mere signal of demoralization, and not its actual provenance, sir. I humbly withdraw my vilification.

Regards,


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 12 Jun 03 - 08:54 PM

hi heer debbee erl ned help bubba bubba did not et kandu jus tasded then bubba bubba sik rel sik an i nurz bubba bubba gud now bubba bubba chanj kal self big blint litenen bubba azk fur gitar an bubba bubba now sin with kandu stuf lik

Now luka heer bluz i wana tak too yu yu ben maken me drinken gamblen an sta ot al niht to now yu got me too the plaz i dond kar wat i du yeah now bluz i wana haf a lidl tak with yu now i belef youf ben drinken munshin bluz cuz yu dond kaar wat yu du

not let me et kandu etir so help debbee erl an debbee erl not et kandu but twed mabee wat meenz bluz wat iz bluz wat iz gitar wat rong wit bubba bubba kan bee kurt plez help


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 12 Jun 03 - 12:10 AM

Goddammit this iz getting to be positively creepy... pore Khing Khnardnoz boiled and consumed and now the exotic Debbee Erl is licking her chops and looking over at my tasty self. Okay, just puree me wif a dozen bulbs obv garlic and five pounds of Blue Cheese in a hammermill, strain through cheesecloth and serve me at room temperature in a galvanized bucket. Move over Khandu, we ar fixing to intermingle in one obv Queen Carol's Crappers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 11:45 PM

CANNIBALISM:

1 : the eating of human flesh by a human being
2 : the eating of the flesh of an animal by another animal of the same kind

The eating of a human being by freds is not cannibalism since freds are not human beings! Since bubba bubba and debee erl had already captured King khandu and were going to eat him anyway, the recipe that I provided was strictly an attempt to make their eating experience more enjoyable. It doesn't mean that I want them to eat King khandu. But, if it's a given that freds are going to eat someone and it's a choice between khandu or Tweed, I'm sorry, but I must take a pragmatic viewpoint.

Ya see, Tweed's got this really cool website that I like hang out at, and if freds ate him then it'd be the end of TWEEDBURG and I'd have to find yet another place to waste my time.

Bubba bubba and debee erl, I am sorry if khandu is not real good eatin' but yer not gettin' th' Tweedster unless ya come after him! Ya unnerstan'?   

Bubba-dubya-ell


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 10:48 PM

Oh, right, RR -- of course the capitalization was just a slip, recurring, and the reference to making foodstuffs from Southerners was about Georgia road-kill, I guess. A thousand pardons duly begged for my harboring of ungentlemanly suspicions, ma'a'm!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 10:46 PM

this debbee erl bubba bubba sik trid et kandu thru up lots an lots now bubba bubba pizd off at kandu want feet him too pet trillirt butt afrayd kandu mak trillirt sik to yu shur yu wont trayd fer twed thinc maibee twed bettr fud than kandu wil put in nis raygun fer boot

whut iz drum milk in resipy how du yu milk drum i tryd butt man hid me wit stix so i et him stix wur krunche gud tho


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 10:17 PM

Of coarse your right Amos. Looking at this in a different perspective, I do see the cannibalism here. Now myself, I didn't realize we where talking about cooking the King Khandu. I thought a khandu was some type of flying squirrel or a relative of the flying rodent. A thousand pardons. I believe it would take more than a can of beer to tenderize the King. Perhaps a couple cases would do.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 09:56 PM

I cannot believe the Mudcat has degenerated in its desperation to discussions -- cheerful, enthusiastic discussions -- of community cannibalism. With RECIPES!!!???

Little Hawk, your true colors have been shown -- you are clearly a monger of Moral Turpitude, a Merchant of Degradation, a Demoralizer of Beingness, a Corroder of Values, a no-goodnik, a bum, and a ne'er-do-well, a pit of Shame on feet.

Put that in your bowl and eat it!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 09:33 PM

Your right Hawk, it has gotten worse. The thought of eating a Khandu makes me shudder with pure delightful joy, but it has definitly gotten worse.
There seems to be something missing in that recipe though, I think it's corn. Hey, Maybe we can get little Missy to get some from her daddy. Little Missy we'll save you the cobs. Maybe it's missing neuticles.
No, on second thought it will already have the real things in there won't it?
Ok I think I know what your recipe is missing Bee-Dub.... Beer. Yup. That's what it is. Gotta add a can of beer just for making the Khandu nice and tender.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 01:56 PM

Yew cain't make nuthin' worthwhile frum a Southerner!

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 11:32 AM

So I should have given them the recipe for Tante Helene's Khandu Gumbo instead?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 11:23 AM

You can't make CHOWDER from a Southerner!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 02:43 AM

My God...

I didn't think it could get any worse, but it has.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Jun 03 - 12:21 AM

Sorry, freds, you're not gettin' Tweed.

But, you might want to share this recipe with debee erl.


Momma's Old-Fashioned Khandu Chowder

1 Khandu
1 5# Bag of onions
1 50# Bag of potatoes
5 Big ole elephant garlics
1 Box salt
1 Box black pepper
1 55 Gallon drum milk
1 Gallon tub of butter

Find something big enough to boil all this stuff in (like an old bathtub). Fill it up with water and throw the Khandu, onions, potatoes and garlic into it. Bring to a boil and allow to simmer for two or three hours. Remove the Khandu from the boiling water. Remove bones, teeth and other inedible parts and chop what's left into bite-size chunks. Drain off the water and replace with the milk. Throw the Khandu chunks back in and add butter, salt and pepper. Heat to just before boiling. DO NOT BOIL - IT WILL SCALD THE MILK! Remove from heat and serve.

Enjoy


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 10 Jun 03 - 10:19 PM

Ok, thanks for the heads up about the jam, Bee-dubya-ell. I'll send a PM if it looks like we'll be around for that.

Sorry Tweed. Mississippi's a beautiful place and all, and I'm sure being the Queen of it would be a great thing to have on my resume. But once a woman gets hold of a man from Newfoundland, she's not likely to be leaving him for a mainlander. At least not by choice.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 10 Jun 03 - 09:48 PM

kandu not cumin bak debbee erl fond him yestirda yu kan haf him bak in swap fer twed butt beter akt soun kaz debbee erl iz getin hungree yez we ar heer had nis trip wil cal soun


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Lil' Missy Fookedup
Date: 10 Jun 03 - 09:12 PM

Hey ya'all. How's it goin' fer ya all today? I'm new round these here parts but I tripped up on this page and found ya all behavin' in a way that reminds me of back home.
See I come from a family of 15 brothers and I's the only girl so's my Mamma calles me Lil' Missy.
We raised corn back in the hills of Ginny and ate lots o corn cuz my Daddy made corn cob pipes for a livin'. Now ifen you wants to yap on about old hippies, I tell ya, they never stopped comin' round our place. They wore them old pipes out faster en you can shake a drip off your weenie. that's hows my Daddy made it so good in the bidness. We et so much corn when ya farted it came out the hole. The hole thing likes ya never chewed it.
Now them old hippies was perty darn right righteous people. They liked leavin Mama fresh herbs for the stew pot every time they a come round. They'd bring all their fiddles and gitars, harmonycas and clackers and sit around nearly a day playin music and smokin' Daddys pipes. And they would never forget to pay Daddy his dollar twenty five for a pipe. Yes sirree. dem was the good old days.
Just wants to say thankee for bringin' me home for a short spell.
love and kisses, Lil Missy Fookedup


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Shiney Knause
Date: 10 Jun 03 - 05:10 PM

Hello, ya'll

I see's thet Amiss feller's still ferm Califernyuh. Cain't unnerstan' uh dang werd thet boy sez. I unnerstan' th' part 'bout th' ole hippiez, but th' res' uv it soundz sorta lack how them politishuns tawk.

Ennywayz, I jus' stopt in t' kerngadulate y'all on gettin' over five-hunnert posts t' this idjit thang ya'll 'r doin' heer. An' t' tell ya'll thet me n' my bruther Sheeney Knause haz reckonsyled ar diffrunces. We wants ya'll t' no thet we wud be glad t' hep ya'll out if'n them fred fellers kum 'round 'n meks bothers uv theirselves.

Yorez Truely,

Shiney Knause


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Jun 03 - 01:10 PM

Good point, Amos. We could also solve a great deal by equipping every household in North America (and eventually the World) with a dachshund. Think about it.

Dead Horse - Way to go, old buddy! I couldn't agree more. Have you been beaten lately?

- LH


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