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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

gnu 08 Sep 13 - 08:15 AM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 08 Sep 13 - 08:09 AM
gnu 08 Sep 13 - 07:20 AM
Rapparee 08 Sep 13 - 01:34 AM
Rapparee 07 Sep 13 - 11:43 PM
gnu 07 Sep 13 - 09:34 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 07 Sep 13 - 01:16 PM
Acme 07 Sep 13 - 01:11 PM
Rapparee 07 Sep 13 - 12:24 PM
gnu 07 Sep 13 - 08:40 AM
Little Hawk 07 Sep 13 - 12:19 AM
Rapparee 06 Sep 13 - 09:35 PM
Little Hawk 06 Sep 13 - 09:21 PM
Rapparee 06 Sep 13 - 06:50 PM
Acme 06 Sep 13 - 05:18 PM
Little Hawk 06 Sep 13 - 04:51 PM
gnu 06 Sep 13 - 04:42 PM
Rapparee 06 Sep 13 - 04:30 PM
Little Hawk 06 Sep 13 - 04:17 PM
gnu 06 Sep 13 - 03:34 PM
Rapparee 06 Sep 13 - 01:24 PM
gnu 06 Sep 13 - 01:01 PM
Little Hawk 06 Sep 13 - 11:22 AM
Amos 06 Sep 13 - 10:45 AM
Amos 06 Sep 13 - 10:00 AM
Rapparee 06 Sep 13 - 09:42 AM
Little Hawk 06 Sep 13 - 01:09 AM
Rapparee 05 Sep 13 - 07:14 PM
Rapparee 05 Sep 13 - 07:12 PM
Little Hawk 05 Sep 13 - 04:15 PM
Rapparee 05 Sep 13 - 04:00 PM
Little Hawk 05 Sep 13 - 02:15 PM
Rapparee 05 Sep 13 - 10:03 AM
Little Hawk 05 Sep 13 - 12:19 AM
gnu 04 Sep 13 - 08:54 PM
Rapparee 04 Sep 13 - 08:52 PM
Rapparee 04 Sep 13 - 08:50 PM
Little Hawk 04 Sep 13 - 04:07 PM
gnu 04 Sep 13 - 02:16 PM
Little Hawk 04 Sep 13 - 12:26 PM
Amos 04 Sep 13 - 11:44 AM
Rapparee 04 Sep 13 - 09:49 AM
Little Hawk 04 Sep 13 - 12:45 AM
Little Hawk 03 Sep 13 - 11:54 PM
gnu 03 Sep 13 - 11:27 PM
Rapparee 03 Sep 13 - 11:26 PM
gnu 03 Sep 13 - 09:07 PM
Acme 03 Sep 13 - 08:40 PM
Little Hawk 03 Sep 13 - 06:56 PM
Rapparee 03 Sep 13 - 06:25 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Sep 13 - 08:15 AM

I don't think the slow buddy tactic works in Churchill. Might draw a crowd eh? Probably need to be in the middle of the herd... a BIG herd.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 08 Sep 13 - 08:09 AM

Yeah, I got a long acquaintance with usin' saps to calm troublesome people down. They work real good.

As for the bears, the best thing to bring when yer in bear country is a not-so-good-friend who can't run as fast as you can, and keep him near to hand at all times.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 Sep 13 - 07:20 AM

Toilet paper. Not for you... for the bears. A steady diet of garbage and tourists gives em the runs eh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Sep 13 - 01:34 AM

What sort of stuff should I bring along for a sojourn in Churchill, MB in early February? I can rent the real heavy-duty stuff there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Sep 13 - 11:43 PM

Got me a sap right here, just like my Uncle Ed used on those punks who messed with him. "A tap with your sap and the sap is crap," as he used to say.

What, you may ask, is a sap? It's one of these, but flatter. Librarians use them as "book weights" so don't mess with librarians.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 07 Sep 13 - 09:34 PM

I am quite certain Rap would offer to help with that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 07 Sep 13 - 01:16 PM

A solid whack to the side of the head might do it too. Works for me.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Sep 13 - 01:11 PM

There's a steroid shot they can give you now to clear out your sinuses. I'd never heard of it before I got one earlier this year, but it works wonders. Check it out!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Sep 13 - 12:24 PM

Why? Is it bothering you? If it is I suppose that LH and I could stop it, isn't that right LH?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 07 Sep 13 - 08:40 AM

Stop that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Sep 13 - 12:19 AM

I'm like....???


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 09:35 PM

It's called "uptalking"? And lots of people with self-esteem issues do it? And my self-esteem has an issue? Like how can I be even greater than being the greatest and Mom's favorite kid?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 09:21 PM

Wow, tough luck, Rap.

Now who the heck are you trying to sound like? When you end everything with a question? Like this? Know what I mean?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 06:50 PM

So a while back I had this oral surgery? And they put in bone grafts and stuff? And for the last week or so I've been blowing my nose and out comes stuff that looks like liquid chocolate? And today I went to the oral surgeon? And he did some x-rays and stuff and found that my right sinus is completed blocked up by an infection? And that's not the side with the big bone graft? So I'm on clindimycin?




(Big Bone Graft -- what a great name for something! Like Big Bone Lick State Park in Kentucky or French Lick, Indiana.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 05:18 PM

I'm back to MOAB today to read the travelogue. Amos is slowly working his way through the New England states, toying with the idea of crossing back into Canada, and is heading toward Mudcat central if he crosses through central PA. Great time of year to be up there - I hope the colors on the mountains are gorgeous.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 04:51 PM

I've dealt with goats before. The nanny goats are quite nice creatures...but the billy goats? Total bastards! They are obsessed with sex and violence, 24 hours a day. And they stink.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 04:42 PM

LH... really? I have no history of such... without due cause. >;-)

Of course, any transgressions (I disagree) by Wildebeeste have nothing to do with goats.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 04:30 PM

At least it's not a fertility rite like Morris Dancing, so the 'rhan players can bang away all day.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 04:17 PM

I've always heard that Bodhran players are a dangerous and unpredictable lot, prone to run amok at any instant, and motivated by strange, atavistic urges. (Almost as bad as Morris dancers!) I don't know if these rumours are true, but I give them a wide berth at the folk festivals.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 03:34 PM

Time can range from "not tonight" to 20 minutes. If I fling my ciapan twice, I quit. If my ganglion goes chipmunk and spouts, "What the fuck are you doing?", I quit. I could feel it coming on when A was here and demonstrated the ganglion problem up close and personal (a foot from his lookers), as in, "Watch this. See that riggin... watch." I am glad he did not faint away at the sight of it as such affects a geetarist in much the same way and is truly frightening. Same fer yer bango players but nobody seems to get much ado over it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 01:24 PM

Play one for any length of time? Like a couple of minutes? Aren't they kinda like a banjo, but without a neck and strings but with the banjo's ability to be almost in tune?

Instead, why not get one of those Japanese drums that are played horizontally? I'm sure your neighbours (being in Canada you can't have neighbors) would appreciate it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 01:01 PM

Oh, now! What a lovely and gracious offer. Why, I would hazrd to say one could probable take one's shoes off when entering chez LH.

I was horrified when Gabe took of his sandals! I said, "Buddy! Leave yer shoes on in this house! Ya might catch suomethin!" I mean, he was BAREfeeties! Now, granted, I had just mopped all the floors but I only mopped them once so his chances of survival were still slim. He declined. Have you heard from Gabe lately, A? I am concerned, you know.

I am presently resisting great temptaion to aquire a new Hran. It would be foolish to buy one without the ability to play one for any length of time. Check out Lavengro's thread re Bodhran tutorials on YT. I am absolutely in love with the O'Kane Hran. Mine are shallow 18" Kearns' and the O'Kane, even with the "cheap" recording system, sounds like something I would love to beat up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 11:22 AM

Ah, yes. Words of wisdom, pard. I'd expect no less from the author of "Beyond the Cascade", a phantasmagorical adventure tale of deep spiritual awakening.

But you're visiting upstate New York? Well, that's just a hop, skip, and a jump from the Canadian border and southern Ontario. I can't fathom why you don't rush up to Orillia for a few days. After all, I have 2 extra bedrooms here, some really neat guitars, a stuffed monkey, and some song circles and stuff to go to, plus I'm doing a 2-hour gig a week from today in Barrie, Ontario. Sheesh. How could you NOT come here under such propitious circumstances?!? ;-D


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 10:45 AM

There may be no contradictions, but there are myriad incomplete statements, which LOOK like contradictions.

Do not be fooled.

The TRUTH is out there, in there, in here and overall throughout all the whatness of the whichness, and the hilarity of who-ness, how-nowness, and everywhere.

All one need do is shift wavelengths and it burbles in among every cell, neuron, thought, image, postulate, hypothesis, regret, memory, intention and picture available to each and every mind in all of Mom's fair and broad land. That's all.


Welcome!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 10:00 AM

Hi, Mom! How delightful to see Rapparee and Hawk bearing forth the guidon of our faire home, in the Cause of pure BS!

I am in the home of a niece in the sunny dappled woods of Southern Connecticut. Tomorrow I head for upstate NY to visit an old friend up there, and thence to Philly the next day to rest a while. The puppy is snoring, the commuters have all commuted, and peace is upon the valley. I think I'll go to Westport and raise some Cain or sompn.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 09:42 AM

If you read it on the Internet it's true. Has to be. There are no contradictions. For example, Obama DOES drink human blood but it's only stuff that's reached it's expiration date at the hospital AND he only drinks it over ice. He IS Muslim but he's uncircumcised so it didn't take. He was born in Hawai'i, a State, of parents who arrived the day before from Proxima Centauri B, so he's a native-born alien. As for lying, well, he's a politician and his lips move.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 13 - 01:09 AM

Yes, I know that, and it's driving me crazy, because I've read all kinds of contradictory things on the Internet...yet I know they must ALL be true! The stuff about Obama alone...it's enough to make your head swim. He's a Muslim. He isn't. He's a natural born citizen. He isn't. He's an alien being. He isn't. He's a Communist. He isn't. He lies. He doesn't. He works for Al Qaeda. He does not work for Al Qaeda. He has a satanic symbol woven into his short-cropped hair. He doesn't. He drinks human blood at night. He doesn't!

Pretty dang confusing. Even more than the Bible is!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Sep 13 - 07:14 PM

That should be "Chong" and not "Choong."

And I found this article on the Internet so it must be true. You can't post lies there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Sep 13 - 07:12 PM

Oh, by the way -- that last comment is my own. I forgot to turn off the italics.

From a close reading of the news article, it would appear that Sham attempted something on Chong and Choong "desired" Sham. Talk about your Disgusting Animals!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Sep 13 - 04:15 PM

Hmmm. Well, they may be trying to stir up sympathy support for Chongo, saying he's been wrongly incarcerated in a foreign nation on false charges. They may threaten military action if he is not freed. I know Chongo, and there's no way he would ever bother going to Blind River to look up Shane, let alone attempt to have sex with him! Chongo would regard Shane as a piece of useless corrupted human trash, beneath contempt, not worth a moment's notice...while Shane would be scared of Chongo if he ever encountered him.

Of course, when Shane is stoned he can do some pretty odd things...he tends to lose touch with reality now and then.

But Chongo would never get drunk enough to consider making a pass at Shane. It's unthinkable. Chongo only makes passes at classy human dames and Chimpettes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Sep 13 - 04:00 PM

I don't know anything about Sham's "whanger" and have no desire to learn anything about it.

No, I don't make any money for simply quoting news articles. You'll have to take it up with the CBC. That is, by the way, the Chimpanzee Broadcasting Corporation, which is a wholly-own subsidiary of the American Primate Party.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Sep 13 - 02:15 PM

LOL!!!

Oh, you awful man, spreading these terrible, scurrilous tales!

You're in the pay of Chongo's political foes, aren't you? Just admit it and repent. You'll feel better.

The "dead weapon" is Shane's whanger, I take it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Sep 13 - 10:03 AM

This just in:

CBC, September 5. Blind River resident Shane McBride was arrested around 7 last evening for morals violation with a visiting American chimpanzee, Chongo Chimp, of Chicago, Illinois.

Mr. McBride was charged with being under the influence of alcohol and illegal drugs, various public health violations, and attempted sexual assault with a dead weapon. He is being held without bond in the Sudbury Jail.

Mr. Chimp was charged with various weapons violations, including possession of a fully automatic weapon, failing to pay import duty on 1,500 cigars and 25 liters of whisky, attempted sexual abuse of a person of diminished mental capacity, resisting arrest, and running several stop signs. He is being held in isolation at the Sudbury Animal Park and Petting Zoo.


Whew! The things that happen over night! Chong and Shame -- who woulda thunk it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Sep 13 - 12:19 AM

I don't know. Chongo says that humans are a defective breed of primate that split off the main line of the noble Great Apes hundreds of thousands of years ago and spiralled down into a sort of devolutionary pattern until we ended up with "Homo Sapiens", a creature which now threatens to infest and compromise the entire planet. He favors culling the less desirable examples of HomSap to improve the breed to a point where they'll cause a lot less trouble.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 08:54 PM

$500/$2= 250# of vidalias. Ya think I am some kinda monkey?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 08:52 PM

The police determined that it was a Black Hand incident.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 08:50 PM

The last case the "Great Chimp Defective" handled was the killing of a hand of bananas. Guess who the culprit was!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 04:07 PM

Chongo is for hire to solve such mysteries, gnu...providing you pay him a $500 retainer plus traveling expenses. Results are guaranteed.*

*(not that we're saying exactly what results...)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 02:16 PM

3 days? I was told it was two by a Maineac you missed. Unfortunate for you both but I understand you "missed the turn".

Now. Where are my god damned Vidalias? After I found the roast beef not to my liking (even tho you and Abe praised it up) I cracked an ale, sat down and thought, "What shall I do?" Time was of the essence. What could I thaw quick and masterfully chef up? Nada except maybe a pasta dish. Damn! I recalled that Sobeys had lean ground beef on sale and I am a BBQ whiz so I had another ale and went through my inventory. NO DILL PICKLES? Seriously... WTF?! Tomatoes... check. Lettuce... none but, hey, fuck that sallymenelly crap. Vidalia on... WHAT? Ya gotta be shittin me! Right... everything else was in stock so I cracked another ale and formulated a plan.

Start the BBQ to get it warmed just right for BBQd burgers. Jump in the iron horse and flash up ta Sobeys fer buns, ohhhnyohn and dills. I was pissed at the fact that there was not ONE bottle of dills so I bought sweets. There were no vidalias! I asked the lad... bags by the each. I don't want a bag... them fuckers are too small and there are too many. He ripped open a bag and told me to take what I wanter and he would mark them at the equivaent price per pound of $2. $2!!?? Not time to go to the Coop so, yeah, okay... 4.

I got home and, in jig time, cracked an ale, slapped out a dozen patties and sizzled. All effort for naught as the lads went straight for the roast beef, spuds, carrots and geenie beanies. I tried the beef as well. I was shocked. Somehow, in the fridge, it had turned into a lovely roast! But, that is not the end of the strange occurences.

Today, I decided to serve burgers for supper. My fridge held the sweet pickles but no Vidalias. Musta put em in the fridge downstairs. Nope. ? Back to the upstairs fridge for a thorough shelf by shelf search. Still none. Musta left em in the truck? Nope. I even checked the cupboards and the microwave (yes, the microwave but I refuse to check the dishwasher in case they are in there). There are NO Vidalia onions anywhere.

There is only one conclusion that can be drawn... Amos is an onion thief.

Or I left them at Sobeys.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 12:26 PM

They should have my job. It requires, oh, maybe 8 hours of work a week and the rest is free time...which means lots of time for music, and reading good books like "Beyond the Cascade".

Right now I'm reading some cool books by John Shelby Spong, an American theologian from New England who has written some great stuff challenging fundamentalism and Biblical literalism. Got one here about Mary called "Born of a Woman", which challenges the old church ideas about the alleged "virgin birth", "immaculate conception", etc. Got another called "Rescuing the Bible from Fundamentalism". He is much appreciated in more liberal Christian quarters, and considered THE enemy in fundamentalist quarters. ;-D

Regarding the writings of Paul, for example, he states that it is extraordinarily naive of people to assume that every word Paul wrote is "the Word of God", because God didn't write it...Paul wrote it!...therefore it is the words of Paul!...and Paul of Tarsus was a man deeply affected by his culture, his time, his background, and his own personal hangups (which would appear to have been numerous).

This is not to say that there isn't some valuable spiritual insight to be gained by reading Paul...or by reading any other spiritual documents that various people wrote back then, providing you understand who they were and where they were coming from, and what their prejudices and beliefs were.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 11:44 AM

I couldn't visit all the Maineacs from Mudcat much as I would have enjoyed it. I spent three days with the Skipper and enjoyed it so much I said I would like to stay forever, or until they got fed up and kicked me out. KEndall reckoned it wouldn't take as long as all that. But we had a wonderful time swapping songs and driving his classic '57 straight-eight Pontiac, with the built-in wolf-whistle. I went over to Portland to have coffee with Charley Noble en famille, and joined up with Jeri strolling through Portsmouth. We visited the gardens and glanced at Strawberry Bank, but the weather was foul and we did not linger there.

Now I am nestled in a little house deep in the Connecticut woods outside of Madison with old friends who are at work today. Odd how many of my friends have that syndrome going on. I tell them all they should just retire, and they seem unsympathetic.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 09:49 AM

Like many other religions, the JWs are millenialist in their beliefs. They ignore what is said in Mark 13:32, where the Naz says (paraphrased slightly), "Ain't nobody knows when it's all gonna end 'ceptin' Big Daddy, and he ain't even tellin' ME. So back off and don't ask me again, okay?"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Sep 13 - 12:45 AM

Okay...I just watched about 10 minutes of it, and....nope...this is not a movie that I find entertaining or that I think would be any worthwhile use of my time to watch it. Nor is it amusing either. Just annoying. It looks like my initial instincts were right. Kevin Smith and I are not on the same general wavelength. I would probably enjoy talking to Prince, though, despite the fact that I think the JW's are way off the beam on quite a bit of their theology.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Sep 13 - 11:54 PM

Hmmm. I haven't given it a look yet. I sort of gathered from what he said in the lengthy talk about him and Prince that he probably makes movies I'd have no real interest in. I think he's into very different stuff than I am, but he is fun to listen to as a speaker.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 03 Sep 13 - 11:27 PM

It's a very odd movie. I just watched it again, hoping to get the same "buzz" but perhaps with a more crical view. It's a very, very odd movie. Not quite at all the same experience as when I first viewed it. Seemed rather B- rate this time around. This time, I found some laffs here and there and some truths, far and few between. Overall, I take back what I said. Yer better off getting the laundry done or gardening. Sorry.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Sep 13 - 11:26 PM

The Yukon Territory has a playlist? Like, a wishbone formation and stuff like that?

I might well go to Manitoba next February. Does Manitoba have a playlist as well?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 03 Sep 13 - 09:07 PM

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk - PM
Date: 31 Aug 13 - 12:13 AM

gnu - That was really interesting. (the video) First of all, I didn't even know who Kevin Smith was, but his storytelling about Prince is great. I do know who Prince is, naturally, but had no idea he was that much into spirituality, Christianity, etc.

Since I'd rather talk about spirituality than pretty well anything else under the sun, I'd probably have an easier time comprehending Prince than Kevin does.

I gather that Kevin makes movies?
**********************************************

Indeed he does. He has a 47 clip playlist on YT. Been in TV talk shows many times. He has made some great films and big time movies. Have you ever seen Dogma?

Here is part one... you'll have to search out the rest yourself. It's worth it.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmcFIbqfOkU


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Sep 13 - 08:40 PM

Is Amos planning to visit every US and Canadian member of mudcat? When do you think he'll make it to Texas? I want to be sure to be home!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Sep 13 - 06:56 PM

Specially in Blind River...

It's probably a good thing he's avoiding that area.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Sep 13 - 06:25 PM

Had to find someone to post bail. Kinda hard to do these days, given his reputation and all.


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