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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 12 Dec 08 - 11:40 AM
Amos 12 Dec 08 - 10:20 AM
Rapparee 12 Dec 08 - 09:12 AM
Amos 12 Dec 08 - 09:07 AM
Rapparee 12 Dec 08 - 09:03 AM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 11:10 PM
Rapparee 11 Dec 08 - 11:00 PM
Acme 11 Dec 08 - 10:58 PM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 07:19 PM
Rapparee 11 Dec 08 - 06:49 PM
Little Hawk 11 Dec 08 - 05:30 PM
Acme 11 Dec 08 - 05:30 PM
Rapparee 11 Dec 08 - 04:54 PM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 04:42 PM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 01:36 PM
Rapparee 11 Dec 08 - 12:38 PM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 12:28 PM
Little Hawk 11 Dec 08 - 11:38 AM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 11:13 AM
Acme 11 Dec 08 - 10:03 AM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 09:33 AM
Rapparee 11 Dec 08 - 09:25 AM
Acme 11 Dec 08 - 01:01 AM
Amos 11 Dec 08 - 12:23 AM
Rapparee 10 Dec 08 - 09:11 PM
Acme 10 Dec 08 - 08:07 PM
Amos 10 Dec 08 - 05:54 PM
Rapparee 10 Dec 08 - 04:02 PM
Amos 10 Dec 08 - 03:46 PM
Rapparee 10 Dec 08 - 01:14 PM
Amos 10 Dec 08 - 10:53 AM
Rapparee 10 Dec 08 - 08:47 AM
Acme 09 Dec 08 - 11:15 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 08 - 07:11 PM
Amos 09 Dec 08 - 06:54 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 08 - 06:36 PM
Amos 09 Dec 08 - 01:33 PM
Acme 09 Dec 08 - 01:07 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 08 - 12:59 PM
Acme 09 Dec 08 - 12:54 PM
MMario 09 Dec 08 - 12:48 PM
Acme 09 Dec 08 - 12:47 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 08 - 12:36 PM
Acme 09 Dec 08 - 12:31 PM
Rapparee 09 Dec 08 - 12:23 PM
Amos 09 Dec 08 - 11:13 AM
GUEST,freds 09 Dec 08 - 11:11 AM
Amos 09 Dec 08 - 09:21 AM
MMario 09 Dec 08 - 09:12 AM
Rapparee 09 Dec 08 - 08:54 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 11:40 AM

Jolly Día de Nuestra Señora de Guadalupe to you all--may all your Virgins be toasty and warm.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 10:20 AM

Oh, he does. It's informal, but anyone who knows Rottweilers gets it. Then, when you come in at 6 or 7 and offer to make amends by cooking up some bacon, all is forgiven, and he restores tenancy in good faith until next time.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 09:12 AM

Doesn't he have to give you notice before eviction?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 09:07 AM

HE evicts you. Like all evictions, a messy process inviolving great diligence and patience. USually, he can complete the process and have complete ownership of the floor of said kitched by 2 or 3 AM.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 09:03 AM

I wasn't aware that Rottweilers were allowed to own kitchen floors in the US. Must be a California thing. Do you have to ask permission from the dog to use the kitchen? Usually dogs LIKE you to prepare food and do kitchen-y things. What happens if the dog doesn't like what you're fixing?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 11:10 PM

One ting I like about this thread--your most accidental literary allusions get gobbled up faster than a slice of bacon on a Rottweiler's kitchen floor.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 11:00 PM

Better to have dopplered and lost than never to have dopplered at all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 10:58 PM

I guess so.

MAB? Is MOM a fairy queen now?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 07:19 PM

Fortunately text does not provide aural dissonance. And good friendships and good humor--the sort at which MAB excels--are usually quite rich with cognitive resonance. Except when Rapaire writes sometimes the cogniticve resnance suffers from a Doppler effects.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 06:49 PM

How about noncognitive dissonance? Or cognitive sonance?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 05:30 PM

As Amos has suggested, the one thing that we simply cannot have around here is cognitive dissonance! Heaven forfend.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 05:30 PM

If vegetarians eat vegetarians, then they aren't vegetarians, are they?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:54 PM

Vegetarians should be aware that they are what they eat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 04:42 PM

Mom!!

Stop worrying about drooping!! Don't you know that you become what you resist???


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 01:36 PM

I don't think you can claim both the perfect symmetrical palindrome AND the Mark of the Beast in one post, Rapaire; the cognitive dissonance is likely to crash the server and bewilder all the Joe Clones.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 12:38 PM

Dibs on 26662 and 26666!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 12:28 PM

The post I recently made on polish types was 26,600. Another Century of BS!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 11:38 AM

At the University of Toronto, in Toronto, Canada the most conservatively-minded students have, since time immemorial, been found in the engineering faculty. Yes, the engineers seem to be the natural supporters of every rock-headed, reactionary conservative policy and attitude one could care to mention. If they were Americans, they'd all be Young Republicans, I guess... ;-)

At any rate, the engineering students at U. of T. have a little newspaper they put out, in which they engage in puerile humor of a rather vulgar sort and in which they write short articles attacking liberals and generally bolstering up their sophomoric sense of identity and solidarity.

That newspaper is called "Toike Oike". (toy-kee-oyk)

They also have a little theme song that they sing at their meetings and at athletic games. It goes:

Toike Oike!
Toike Oike!
Ollum te chollum te chay!
School of Science!
School of Science!
Hooray! Hooray! Hooray!


That song sums up all you will ever need to know about U. of T. engineers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 11:13 AM

Yoiks!!!

("An important part of the Lapp culture is the music. Lapp music is often connected with the traditional "yoik" which is the oldest and best known musical form. The "yoik" is a combination of using your voice both to sing the lyric and to use it as an instrument. You find the "yoik" all over Lapland with some variations in style. The "yoik" often depicts situations, persons and animals.

The "yoik" has not always been accepted by society. In connection with the christening of the Lapps, "yoiking" was concidered a sinful practice. Many Lapps even adopted this view. But nowadays the "yoik" has been accepted by most. Now it's even accepted in church.")

I dunno--it kind of reveals their pagan roots to think they tolerate yoiking about in church...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 10:03 AM

Also don't confuse Pole dancers with Lap dancers. (Sami to some).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 09:33 AM

Don't confuse the metal pole-ish types, like Swanno the Fireman, with the metal polish types, like Juanita the Illegal Immigrant and KAzinsky the Car Detailer. A world of difference awaits you. But if you enter therein, you will never be the same again. Not that you ever were before, either.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 09:25 AM

They come, of course, from Pole Land. That's where the North, South, East, and West Poles are, along with barber poles and fire poles and pole-er bears and the magnetic poles and pole dancers and even metal pole-ish are.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 01:01 AM

Yes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Dec 08 - 12:23 AM

More like barbershop singing in support of the poles.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 09:11 PM

Polish barbershop singing?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 08:07 PM

Barbershop with the pole.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 05:54 PM

As a gentleman, it behooves me--nay, it is my bounden duty--to present to my fellow music lovers here on the MOAB one of the most appropriate and best-executed works of a cappella four-part harmony singing I have ever heard. This one's for you, Spaw--the father of Mudcat BS Everywhere.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 04:02 PM

Thank you for your kindness. You are a gentleman.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 03:46 PM

Ah, I thought as much. Thanks for the compliment; I will alert you instanter should a reciprocal occasion arise.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 01:14 PM

That is true, Amos. For instance, I remember a couple of hundred or so posts back you were correct in something you said.   I remember I was so impressed by it at the time I made especial note of it, and I have that note somewhere here on my desk or maybe I used it as a bookmark or something. Anyway, the fact that you were actually correct made a big impression on me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 10:53 AM

At least not everyone is completely, unalterably wrong in Rapaire's book. Even if he insists on having seen the Palindrome.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 08 - 08:47 AM

Yes, and it was frightening to see. Diodes all over, transistors gouged out...nasty, nasty stuff.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 11:15 PM

It probably fought with the fax machine over which was in charge of the phone line, so just as well.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 07:11 PM

I had a scansion once but I didn't watch it much so I sold it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 06:54 PM

..nor so deaf as one who has never wondered about the sound of scansion flushing...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 06:36 PM

I've wandered about a bit in my time
Of palindromes I've seen a few
But I found it was better in every clime
To my food to thoroughly chew.

CH: Oh, I have no life to bother my wife
No liver to prove untrue,
Just take my advice
And never think twice
But thoroughly your food you chew.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:33 PM

So oft in theologic wars, the disputants, I ween,
Rail on in utter ignorance of what each other mean,
And prate about a palindrome not one of them has seen!


It saddens me to see my MOABite sibs descend to such railing; and I am soberly reminded of the wisdom of one of the Good Books: none is so blind as he who has never wondered whether or not he can see.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 01:07 PM

Well, whatever, I agree with you to not ride on it. And be sure not to step behind it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:59 PM

The sign said, "Ride The Tame Palindrome."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:54 PM

You should see the poop that comes out of those hornworms (if you're a gardener, you may have already). Put it on the scale of the aerodrome/palindrome and you have a huge mess. So far they've been able to blame it on adjacent feed lots and chicken processors, but one of these days the EPA is going to get wise (after Jan. 20, one suspects).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:48 PM

batten down the hatches....this could get nasty.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:47 PM

Unh huh. Jabberwocky. It has an element of the scorpion DNA in it.

Palindrome is related entomologically to the Tobacco Hornworm.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:36 PM

Palindrome.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:31 PM

You dope!

That was the jaberwocky. Don't you know anything?

Duh.

Sorry to be rude, but really, that was such a very silly mistake!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 12:23 PM

WRONG!!

There was a trained palindrome at the County Fair just last Fall and I saw it. I saw its mighty wings, its flashing tusks, the shredding claws of its feet, the venom dripping from the sting in its prehensile tail. I smelled the sour-sweet stink of death that befouls its wretched breath. No, I did not pay to take a ride on it like all the other kids were doing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 11:13 AM

It was six men of Indostan to learning much inclined,
Who went to see the palindrome though all of them were blind,
That each by observation might satisfy his mind.

The First approached the palindrome, and happening to fall
Against his last three characters, at once began to bawl:
'God bless me! But the palindrome has no symmetry at all!'

The Second, feeling of the front, cried, 'Ho! What have we here?
The thing begins with 256? To me 'tis mighty clear
This wonder of a palindrome is binary, my dear!'

The Third approached the plaindrome, and happening to take
The middle digits in his grasp, thus boldly up and spake:
'I see,' quoth he, 'the palindrome is surely on the take!'

The Fourth reached out an eager hand, and felt about the whole,
Quoth he, "This mighty palindrome is vexed, upon my soul!
It goeth there and cometh here, a rock that is a roll!"

The Fifth, who chanced to touch the end, began to swear and glower
He cried, "I see it plainly, having felt it for an hour;
This marvel of an palindrome is pi to some odd power!'

The Sixth no sooner had begun about the thing to try,
than, seizing on the second pair of digits, gave a cry:
'I see,' quoth he, 'the plaindrome's the inverse squate of i!'

And so these men of Indostan disputed loud and long,
Each in his own opinion exceeding stiff and strong,
Though each was partly in the right, and all were in the wrong!

Moral:

So oft in theologic wars, the disputants, I ween,
Rail on in utter ignorance of what each other mean,
And prate about a palindrome not one of them has seen!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,freds
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 11:11 AM

So do we. We incorporated the DNA of one of your University teachers into us earlier today and it was, we are sorry to say, somewhat unpalatable. On the other hand, we incorporated a "politician" several of your weeks ago and only now are recovering from the digestive upset. How in the name of the Universe do you keep those from reversing your peristalsis?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 09:21 AM

Dang, I jes love larning.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 09:12 AM

The pupal stage (between the hibernation and the aerodrome stage) is the well known hippodrome.

Some natural scientists refer to the aqautic version of the palindrome as a hippodrome, which can grow confusing, but the aquatic form is more properly known as a hyrdrodrome.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 08 - 08:54 AM

I have been researching this subject very thoroughly the last couple of hours and I have found that a palindrome is the non-flying stage of the aerodrome. Apparently, a palindrome is the the larval stage of the velodrome, a rather nasty and stupid creature which is always running around in circles. After mating, the velodrome lays its eggs in the nearest briar patch (even traveling thousands of kilometers to find one). The eggs hatch and after eating all of the vegetation for several hectares around (including wooden houses and any other formerly living vegetation) spin a cocoon and, from nine to sixteen months later, emerge as a palindrome. After spending several years chasing its own tail, the palindrome digs a hole and hibernates. During this time it gradually metamorphs into the beautiful aerodrome, whose sole purpose is to suck fermented nectar from flowers and mate indiscriminately with anything with wings. When fertilized, the aerodrome lays its eggs in violin and guitar cases and these, of course, hatch into velodromes and begin the whole stupid thing over again. After egg-laying, the aerodrome falls to the ground and is run over by passing aeroplanes.


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