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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 14 Jun 09 - 10:27 PM
Rapparee 14 Jun 09 - 10:04 PM
Amos 14 Jun 09 - 09:57 PM
Acme 14 Jun 09 - 09:29 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Jun 09 - 08:53 PM
Janie 14 Jun 09 - 08:43 PM
Acme 14 Jun 09 - 06:54 PM
Rapparee 14 Jun 09 - 03:41 PM
Amos 14 Jun 09 - 12:19 PM
Little Hawk 14 Jun 09 - 12:12 PM
Rapparee 14 Jun 09 - 11:35 AM
Acme 14 Jun 09 - 11:14 AM
Rapparee 14 Jun 09 - 08:40 AM
Little Hawk 14 Jun 09 - 01:27 AM
Amos 14 Jun 09 - 12:15 AM
Little Hawk 14 Jun 09 - 12:01 AM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 10:04 PM
Amos 13 Jun 09 - 09:47 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 09:25 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 09:25 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 09:20 PM
Little Hawk 13 Jun 09 - 08:01 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 07:58 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 07:45 PM
Amos 13 Jun 09 - 07:16 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 06:10 PM
Acme 13 Jun 09 - 05:38 PM
Amos 13 Jun 09 - 02:38 PM
Acme 13 Jun 09 - 12:08 PM
Janie 13 Jun 09 - 11:47 AM
Rapparee 13 Jun 09 - 09:28 AM
Amos 13 Jun 09 - 12:52 AM
Acme 13 Jun 09 - 12:49 AM
Janie 12 Jun 09 - 11:21 PM
Acme 12 Jun 09 - 11:17 PM
Janie 12 Jun 09 - 10:41 PM
Rapparee 12 Jun 09 - 10:21 PM
Amos 12 Jun 09 - 06:50 PM
Rapparee 12 Jun 09 - 05:44 PM
Amos 12 Jun 09 - 05:19 PM
Rapparee 12 Jun 09 - 04:26 PM
Amos 12 Jun 09 - 02:44 PM
Amos 12 Jun 09 - 01:53 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 09 - 01:26 PM
Amos 12 Jun 09 - 01:24 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 09 - 12:56 PM
Acme 12 Jun 09 - 12:55 PM
MMario 12 Jun 09 - 12:45 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 09 - 12:43 PM
Amos 12 Jun 09 - 12:35 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 10:27 PM

Well, I am sure they are all optimists.

Mom, it was too chilly for kayaking with the overcast and all. So today I finished reading Little Woemn and went to a dressage competition and made a movie for a friend out of her entry. Quite a nice afternoon. So be of good cheer -- your fountain of virtue and bright sunlight has not ceased its effervescence.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 10:04 PM

God knows I'm sorry, Amos. There is no one sorrier than I am, and there are lots of people who will tell you that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 09:57 PM

A little fresh air in the very best places is never a crisis, ma'am!! :D

Rapaire, your condescension is much too thick and overdone to be effective, I am sorry. You have to be subtler to make it stick.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 09:29 PM

Guy behind me in line at the return desk leaned forward and quietly said "Ma'am, your trousers are ripped" or some such brief message that had me reaching back and finding the seam had split after I'd torn them working. Several inches of undies in view. So there I am, walking through the store, wondering if I wrecked one of my better pairs of undies while I was exposed to the world and sitting the ground, instead of being glad I had a better pair on, all things considered.

I think my reaction is thus entirely because of my age. Had this happened, say, when I was 20 and out climbing a mountain. . . oh, wait, it did happen then. I borrowed someone's wind pants for the rest of the trip. I guess this scenario has never resulted in a crisis response.

:)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 08:53 PM

A tear down the back of your gardening pants? Most people's tears go down their cheeks.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 08:43 PM

A woman after my own heart, Stilly!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 06:54 PM

MOM nearly fell off the porch laughing when she heard that I walked through Home Depot with a big tear down the back of my gardening pants. I had to quick find a nail apron to put on to hide the rip.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 03:41 PM

"Battle Fury" is about as close as you'll get to a translation, Amos.

I'm sorry; I should have known that you wouldn't be familiar with the Tain or any part of the Ulster Cycle of Irish literature, or why the Pains Of The Men of Ulster forced my ol' buddy Setanta to guard that ford. But that's okay, I realize that you're not a librarian and hence can't be expected to know everything.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 12:19 PM

His Lon Laith hath Sprung? What the devil, oh Grubber of Textes, is a lon laith, then?



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 12:12 PM

We're still having the coldest spring in living memory here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 11:35 AM

63F is super-hot? It's 61 now. Yes ma'am, gonna be a real scorcher today. Even got a 30% chance of rain in various places 'round here.

But I gotta go to the food store and then go get some topsoil first.

THEN I can make a stab a cutting the grass.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 11:14 AM

MOM says you'd better get out and mow the lawn before it gets super hot out there. Already starting too late, but it will be worse later.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 08:40 AM

So if the "urgent natural necessity" again falls upon me as upon my old friend Setanta --

"Denaid comarli for Ailill, Gudid Conculainn im for lecud asind inudsa ar ni ragaid ar ecin tairis uair rodlebaing a long laith, ar ba ges dosom intan no linged a lon laith ind imreditis a traigthi iarma ocus a escada remi, odus muil a orcan for a lurgnib, ocus in dala suil inachend, ocus araili fria chend anechtair; do coised fer chend for a beolu. Nach findae bid fair ba hathithir delca sciach, ocus banna fola for cach finnu. Ni aithgnead coemu na cairdiu. Cumma no slaided riam ocus iarma. Is desin dober fir nolnecmacht in riastarthu do animm do Coinculainn. (Lebor na hUidhre, fol. 34, b1.)

which, since you do not read or speak the Old Irish:

    "'Take counsel together,' said Ailil; 'entreat Cuchullain that he may permit you to leave this place, since you cannot pass by him forcibly, because his lon laith has sprung,'?For it was usually the case with him when his lon laith started in him, that his feet turned backwards and his arms forward, and the calves of his legs were transferred to his shins, and one of his eyes sank deep into his head, whilst the other was protruded, and a man's head would fit in his mouth. Every hair on his head was sharper than then thorns of whitethorn, and a drop of blood stood on each hair. He would not know friends or relations, and he slew equally backwards and forwards. Hence it was that the men of Connacht applied the name of 'Riastartha' to Cuchullainn."

(Of course, knowing him from is youth he'll always be Setanta to me.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 01:27 AM

I think it's mental and emotional hygiene that you might better speak of when it comes to moral imperatives, Amos. ;-)

But when ones needs desperately to pee, it's not a moral imperative...it's a physical imperative.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 12:15 AM

Little Hawk:

Personal hygeine is a moral imperative, but not a necessity. Just look at Shane.

Rapaire:

Oh, ye manne of faylse vetrue!! Well thou knowest it is no Modestie which its own name ever pronounceth.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Jun 09 - 12:01 AM

"urgent natural necessity"

So, Amos, are you going to rhapsodize my recent trip to the washroom then?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 10:04 PM

Amos, it was a truly heroic thing to do, demonstrating both virtue and selflessness and will be an inspiration to everyone for generations to come, and I did it with little comment because of an urgent natural necessity.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 09:47 PM

Rapaire:

I never rhapsodize acts of pure self-indulgence. Only deeds of heroism, virtue, selflessness, inspiration, or urgent natural necessity.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 09:25 PM

I'll take 29700. Amos can make up an epic about it later.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 09:25 PM

Oh, hell.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 09:20 PM

And even if he's caught it a sudden rain shower an extra shift is put on at the water pollution control plant and both the Canadian and US Great Lakes authorities are alerted to a possible water pollution catastrophe.

Is it true that Shame won a prize for "Best Garden" because the Blind River Garden Club saw what had grown out of his dirt and assumed he was an entry? And that the bar in front of which he was laying won a prize for best garden decor?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 08:01 PM

Shane's strength is as the strength of ten because he seldom bathes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 07:58 PM

I meant, of course, larkspur. Larksput was a queen of Ancient Egypt (17th Dynasty); he was quite a guy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 07:45 PM

Me tambien, Amos.

I just finished planting the planters on the porch rail (fuchsia, lobelia, and primroses this year), planting more around the Frankie statchoo (Shasta daisies, penstemon, larksput), and preparing the circle out front where the tree had been (loosing soil, digging in and mixing topsoil and peat), and I did all this AFTER getting a haircut -- proving that unlike Samson, my strength is the strength of ten because my heart is pure.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 07:16 PM

There's no question you were qualified...


Mom, I bought new strings and new tuners for my little Korean nylon-string guitar and installed same. When they have finished stretching I will tune 'em up and she'll be right as rain.


The sound of the strings reminds me of a time when I was young, perhaps 15; an explorer/photographer who had been befriended by our family between trips to Africa took me to a Segovia concert in New York, and the old master was just amazing. We went backstage afterwards, and I got to shake hands. I was amazed how square and short his fingers were; and I remember a tearful Spaniard in the backstage crowd, sotto voce to Segovia, "Buenas noches, Maestro... y Bravo!! Bravo!!. The thing that struck me was that the Spaniard, middle-aged, careworn and overweight, had fire in his heart and tears in his eyes. Segovia nodded soberly and graciously; but my youthful impression was that he was ready to go home to a glass of roja and a soft bed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 06:10 PM

Well Mom, the PAMMSC is now officially certified. I guess this means I'm certified too, huh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 05:38 PM

Damned hot out there this afternoon. 96 and 54% humidity makes it feel like I was working in a steam juicer or something. (Getting ready for making jelly as soon as the grapes across the road are ripe).

Picked up mulch at the city's free compost site. I was only going to pick up a little for me but I took pity on four big guys who rolled out of a minivan with various old plastic laundry baskets but not a shovel between them. I loaned them my spare shovel and kept loading mulch into a big plastic bag for the neighbor who has been needing some (the tarp on the bed of my pickup already was loaded with as much as I needed this trip.) They got in out of the heat a littler sooner, my neighbor got the mulch she needed, and my dogs couldn't figure out what the story was when I turned up in the "wrong" back yard with the bag and my wheelbarrow. ;-D


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 02:38 PM

What good is dining
On veggies and chips?
That food is just a bore
Just be a carnivore, old chum,
Come be a Carnivore!.

Better eat something
That won't go to your hips
Just be a carnivore, old chum,
Come be a Carnivore!.

Come taste the wine,
Cook up a steak!.
Sharpen your blade,
Start celebrating;
Right this way,
Roast beef is waiting

Don't let those grannies
Dictate to your lips
Porkchops bring so much more!
Just be a carnivore, old chum,
Come be a Carnivore!.
Just be a carnivore, old chum,
Come be a Carn-iiii-vooooore!.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 12:08 PM

You could cook the meat into something then refreeze it. You could even grill it then freeze it. Not as good when it's frozen so you wouldn't thaw and warm and eat plain, but it could be then used to make something on a rainy day, like to saute onions and peppers and add thin sliced steak and make fajitas.

Our pattern is heavy rain in evening, sunny mornings, but so soggy can't do much.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 11:47 AM

That sounds good, Rap. Soon as I eat up all this thawed beef I'll go buy some pork.

Looks like I'm gonna be a carnivore for a bit.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 09:28 AM

It's a nice maranand for pork -- pour a bottle over some cutlets or a loin roast and let is marinate all day. Turn the meat every so ofter, and cook with sweet onions and tart apples (like Granny Smiths). You can put a bit of cinnamon and allspice and a couple turns of black pepper in just before you put it in the oven.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 12:52 AM

Warm it in a pot with a pinch or a stick of cinnamon in it. Add honey to taste.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Jun 09 - 12:49 AM

Could you let it sit and turn into vinegar?

When the airline tickets arrive, I'll be ready to hop on the plane!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 11:21 PM

Hmmm....chicken breasts maybe?

What time can expect you all to arrive tomorrow for the cookout?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 11:17 PM

Maybe you can soak something in it, before cooking? Or pour it into something that is cooking?

More thunderstorms. Again. I didn't get to mow tonight. So tomorrow the grass is long and soggy. The day will be muggy. Yuck.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 10:41 PM

Lacking testoterone, but not lacking at all in testiness, I'm gonna ignore all ya'll's sparring. (Also lacking in wit, but since I'm related, you are obliged to love me anyways.)

Accidentally bought a 6 pack of hard cider (Woodchuck Amber, made in Vermont.) Never had hard cider before. Not much of a cider fan, anyhoo.) Mild tasting, and a bit sweet for my taste. Maybe it would be nice at a hallowe'en or Christmas party, but think I would prefer mulled wine.

Any good recipes for using it up? I can't imagine drinking it all before it goes stale.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 10:21 PM

Ubi caritas...well, if you absolutely MUST ignore such things your kilogram will be off by a bit, sort of like a butcher with his thumb pushing up or pushing down the scale, but since gravitation is universal it would probably be somewhat difficult to find a place without said anomalies or others waiting to be discovered. So in charity and love I'll allow 1 kg. mass = 1 kg. weight (+/- a smidge), and this can go up or down from there.

Kind, charitable, caring, sharing, tolerant to a fault -- c'est moi.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 06:50 PM

'Twas ever the task of Menne of Bookes
To add decimals in places
Where no-one looks.
The results of which
Are endless gleaning
In seas of data
Free of meaning.


In any case, sirrah, to take me task for ignoring Bouquier anomalies in my discussion of guacamole is most uncharitable, and even shrewish of you!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 05:44 PM

And, Old Man Of the Sea, wouldst thou find exactly 1G (that is, g = 9.8 m/s^2)?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 05:19 PM

No, I am not sure, oh Manne of BOokes; but a kilogram of mass surely weighs a kilogram at 1G.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 04:26 PM

It is generally accepted that 6.02 x 1023 atoms of carbon weigh 12.01 grams. 6.02 x 1023 atoms of copper weigh 63.55 grams. ANd 6.02 x 1023 atoms of helium weigh 4.003 grams.

Gee, Amos. did you figger that out yer own self? If so, are you certain you're not confusing atomic weight with atomic mass?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 02:44 PM

It is generally accepted that 6.02 x 1023 atoms of carbon weigh 12.01 grams. 6.02 x 1023 atoms of copper weigh 63.55 grams. ANd 6.02 x 1023 atoms of helium weigh 4.003 grams.

As we can clearly see from experience, guacamole, per cubic centimetre, weighs much more than helium, a good deal more than carbon, and less than solid copper.

From these figures, I would extrapolate that 6.02x10^23 molecules of guacamole weigh (>4.03, >12.01, <63.5) and will call a rough figure of merit at about 40.574 grams, the estimated mass of a guacamole mole (a mole of guacamole molecules). Mmmmmm---OLÉ!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 01:53 PM

Call ME out? You're the one with mole hair in your teeth.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 01:26 PM

Oh, FIE, sir! FIE! I may have to call you out if you persist in these unwarranted and scurrilous allegations.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 01:24 PM

THen you should try your sexual adventures on humans, instead.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 12:56 PM

I don't like getting those little mole hairs in my teeth.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 12:55 PM

Are you mixing your mole with guacamole (different)? Aguacate with guacamole (the same)?

I make guacamole in big batches and freeze the extra in ice cube trays. I made a really good batch this week so picked up some more avocados to make more this weekend. My picky eater son will eat guacamole though try to get him to eat other green stuff and he mostly shudders.

The Switch will be flipped in a few minutes. We're viewing via a converter box, so I expect no changes, but maybe the digital signal might be a little stronger. That would be nice for a few of these channels.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 12:45 PM

you can make moles from avacados though - which is what guacamole means!

6x10^23 makes a nice sauce


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 12:43 PM

Yes, give your thanks to Juan Jesus Escobar Felipe Renaldo de Vasconcelos y Calderon. Without him you would now be subsisting on cucarachas in a filthy hole in Ciudad Juarez.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Jun 09 - 12:35 PM

That's the phone number of the Mexican lawyer who got you out of jail in Cuernevaca, man. Your Abogado's Number was all that stood between you and an intimate relationship with some unpleasant Aztecas.

A


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