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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 12 Oct 07 - 09:10 AM
MMario 12 Oct 07 - 09:06 AM
Rapparee 12 Oct 07 - 09:01 AM
Acme 12 Oct 07 - 12:26 AM
Amos 11 Oct 07 - 08:51 PM
Rapparee 11 Oct 07 - 08:37 PM
Amos 11 Oct 07 - 06:53 PM
Rapparee 11 Oct 07 - 06:37 PM
Amos 11 Oct 07 - 06:07 PM
Rapparee 11 Oct 07 - 05:25 PM
Amos 11 Oct 07 - 01:14 PM
Acme 11 Oct 07 - 11:09 AM
MMario 11 Oct 07 - 10:21 AM
Amos 11 Oct 07 - 10:13 AM
MMario 11 Oct 07 - 09:16 AM
Rapparee 11 Oct 07 - 09:13 AM
Rapparee 11 Oct 07 - 08:48 AM
MMario 11 Oct 07 - 08:44 AM
Acme 11 Oct 07 - 12:06 AM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 09:18 PM
Amos 10 Oct 07 - 04:27 PM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 03:36 PM
Acme 10 Oct 07 - 03:14 PM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 02:10 PM
MMario 10 Oct 07 - 01:53 PM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 01:52 PM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 01:52 PM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 01:02 PM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 12:56 PM
Amos 10 Oct 07 - 12:30 PM
Acme 10 Oct 07 - 11:35 AM
Rapparee 10 Oct 07 - 09:03 AM
Amos 10 Oct 07 - 08:50 AM
Amos 10 Oct 07 - 12:00 AM
Rapparee 09 Oct 07 - 08:50 PM
Amos 09 Oct 07 - 06:19 PM
Acme 09 Oct 07 - 04:40 PM
Rapparee 09 Oct 07 - 04:10 PM
MMario 09 Oct 07 - 03:51 PM
Amos 09 Oct 07 - 03:16 PM
Rapparee 09 Oct 07 - 03:14 PM
Amos 09 Oct 07 - 01:12 PM
Rapparee 09 Oct 07 - 12:48 PM
Amos 09 Oct 07 - 10:26 AM
Amos 09 Oct 07 - 08:58 AM
Rapparee 09 Oct 07 - 08:54 AM
Acme 09 Oct 07 - 12:15 AM
Amos 09 Oct 07 - 12:12 AM
Rapparee 08 Oct 07 - 10:58 PM
Amos 08 Oct 07 - 05:55 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Oct 07 - 09:10 AM

There are small clusters of that Ilk in almost every large city, MM. But you have to know where to look. What worries me about Rapaire is that he obviously knows all too well.

I love the hunting lodge. Set it up, I'll take it.

Do you have to pay grounds fees to the golf course to hunt golves across their land?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 12 Oct 07 - 09:06 AM

What I'd like to know is what is the ecological impact of a Golf Course on the Ilk of the region? Especially on the rather rare and local species - the Legion Ilk. One must admit that one does not find Ilk of the Legion kind at any great distance from Pocatello.

Well, I will admit I would also like to know why a hunting ground for golves is a "course" rather then a preserve, or some other term. Is it because they are sight hunters like coursing hounds, rather then scent hunters?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Oct 07 - 09:01 AM

What a great idea! Amos could use it as a hunting lodge! I can see it now: the gun room, paneled in aged oak, filled with Holland and Holland double rifles, Merkel shotguns, and big game trophies; the billiards room; the rustic, yet luxurious, bedrooms; the servants quarters; the wretched hovels of the beaters and ghillies; the kennels with their mastiffs and wolfhounds; the wine cellar filled with fine vintages; the cognac, brandy and scots whisky sitting on the sideboard in decanters cut from single rock crystals....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Oct 07 - 12:26 AM

So, Amos, you gonna buy that house to use as a hunting lodge during the golve hunting season? And if you end up with any moose meat (you have to be able to supply the tag numbers of the vehicle that hit it to assure freshness) I'd like to place an order for some ground meat. (It's wonderful in tacos).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 08:51 PM

I have all my teeth. Some I grew, and some were boughten. But they're all mine, you hear me???? MINE!!! Mwahahahahaha,,,,

As for dementia, well, I don't hold with it.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 08:37 PM

Ha! This puts me one up on Amos in the science news category! (How many teeth do YOU have?)

Tooth loss may predict the development of dementia late in life, according to research published in the October issue of The Journal of the American Dental Association.

Numerous past studies have shown that patients with dementia are more likely than patients without the condition to have poor oral health. Few researchers, however, have examined the relationship from the opposite direction, to determine whether poor oral health actually may contribute to the development of dementia.

To that end, researchers from the University of Kentucky College of Medicine and College of Dentistry, Lexington, studied data from 144 participants in the Nun Study, a study of aging and Alzheimer's disease among Catholic sisters of the School Sisters of Notre Dame. The researchers used dental records and results of annual cognitive examinations to study participants from the order's Milwaukee province who were 75 to 98 years old.

"Of the participants who did not have dementia at the first examination, those with few teeth (zero to nine) had an increased risk of developing dementia during the study compared with those who had 10 or more teeth," the authors write.

They propose several possible reasons for the association between tooth loss and dementia: not only periodontal disease but also early-life nutritional deficiencies, infections or chronic diseases that may result simultaneously in tooth loss and damage to the brain.

However, they note, whether the tooth loss has any real role in bringing about the dementia is impossible to say on the basis of this study. "It is not clear from our findings whether the association is causal or casual," they write, urging further study.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 06:53 PM

Hmmm...as bright as that, huh? Wow.

A.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 06:37 PM

Aw, shucks, Amos. I hate to say, it but my momma used to call me "Sun" cuz I wuz so bright.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 06:07 PM

Rapaire is so bright, I am going to enter his name as a candidate on the "BS: Replacements for incandescent lights" thread.

He is a veritable neon-con.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 05:25 PM

Yes, the permit the police give you is called a "Driver's License."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 01:14 PM

Likewise with feral golves. They have to trank them or they won't hold still for the driver. The technique for golves is a bit different, though, because they have atypical nervous systems; they are "tranked" by Argyle and some other specific frequencies of Plaid. So you see, there's a method to the sartorial madness seen in their usual hunting grounds.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 11:09 AM

About those meeses:

the moose is tranked and relocated.

Thank goodness they trank them! My mind is at ease now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 10:21 AM

and probably from australian killer ducks on the other - but GLUON is not feral.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 10:13 AM

According to some theories, he was descended fro feral golves on his father's side.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 09:16 AM

You're not letting Gluon anywhere near those thigs, are you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 09:13 AM

Regarding the golves: In the wild they are extremely vicious little critters, standing on the average about 18 hands high and 8 across the withers. Their teeth, off which they have sixteen rows top and 18 to 22 bottom, vary in length from six to sixteen inches; the hollow down the middle is a channel for the hemoneurotoxin secreted from the poison sac located just behind what passes for their brain (the sac holds slightly over two liters of poison). They are covered with little dimples which, when the beastie is angered, become filled with extremely sharp spines tipped with barbed points; each spine is filled with a kerosene-like substance that spills out and ignites when the spine is torn loose and embedded in the victim. They move by rolling along, sometimes reaching speeds of forty or more miles per hour, and have been known to "hop" from place to place. These hops can cover over 300 meters, and are usually used as a form of surprise attack -- the animal screams just before it lands on its victim and if you hear "FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR" you best defend yourself from the attacking golf. You won't be able to do so, but you can try -- one chap, back in 1897, managed to fend one off for six seconds. He died horribly, of course, but the record still stands.

Golves kill everything they touch. If you're in The West and you see an area of scrub and sagebrush you can bet that it's just now recovering from the passage of a herd of golves, perhaps as along as a century ago.

They do make good and faithful pets, and they're wonderful with children. It's the wild ones that are a problem, and those that turn feral, and those that suddenly lose their domestication.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 08:48 AM

Actually, yes. And they have been known to wander down into town. When that happens the Fish & Game people are usually called, the moose is tranked and relocated. A calf moose got stuck in a basement window late last Fall, in fact; F&G had a devil of a time working that one out!

There are also cougar, black bear, whitetail deer, mule deer, and lots and lots of horses and cattle.

Out here, cattle are sometimes called "slow elk" by some who consider themselves hunters. This is usually done in a courtroom just before sentencing, and thirty days plus probation plus a fine plus reparations plus loss of hunting privileges plus loss of everything involved with the "hunt" is still preferable to how the ranchers USED to deal with thos who hunted "slow elk." Something about a tree and a lariat, if I remember correctly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 08:44 AM

Great Gallopping Ghosties! All that frepower for a golf?

A wee bit of overkill, isn't it? Or do golves in Pocatello run larger then the norm?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 12:06 AM

I prefer moose. Are there any available?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 09:18 PM

Actually, City Ordinance 321.189 (revised April, 1993) reads in part:

It shall be illegal and punishable with sentence no less than sixty (6) days in the county jail and a fine of no less than five thousand dollars ($5,000.00) to hunt or take by any method any golf living in a wild state within the city limits of Pocatello (as they shall from time to time be revised) unless said golf has been adjudged to be dangerous to life and/or property and a predation license issued by the Police Department to the nearest property owner of record, who must use a firearm of no less than one-half inch (0.50 inch) caliber or a longbow having a draw weight of no less than one hundred twenty-five pounds (125 pounds) propelling an arrow having a tip of at least four (4) cutting surfaces.

It is, however, permissible to have a shootout on Main Street at High Noon, provided you obtain the necessary variances from the City Council.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 04:27 PM

...except that there is an old Blue Law that prohibits the taking of Elke while the animal is "wythinne the Boundes of a Golffe Course namede as Such in ye Citye Recordes." Back then it was considered unsportsmanlike. Nobody of course thought to do anything about the shooting of trees in cold blood on the same golf course.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 03:36 PM

Right about now it doesn't matter, since a lot of parts of trees fell down in heavy wet snow (it was unexpected!) last Saturday. But the trunks range up to about 40 inches around or more. There were elk on the golfcourse last winter, so you could have fuel AND food.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 03:14 PM

How large are the trees on that golf course? The map I looked at shows some lines of trees that look fairly sparse. What are the prospects for cutting firewood (discreetly) on the golf course in dark of night?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 02:10 PM

No, it would now be post-post abuse.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:53 PM

Did you just accuse Amos of post abuse? That's traumatic!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:52 PM

I'll protect it so Amos can't abuse the poor thing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:52 PM

Oh, whatthehell.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 01:02 PM

It's number 7307.22374 at this site here, third page, 2311 South Fairway (about the 7th picture down) if you'd like to see what it looks like.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:56 PM

It'd be about 4,000 sq ft, about the same as mine. Probably 3 or 4 baths, probably 5 or 6 bedrooms, garage...backyard, apart from golf course, is about 50 x 100 feet or just a tad less. Annual property taxes would run about $3,500 - $4,000.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:30 PM

How old? How big? How much snow in the winter? How much land? What sort of tax rate?

A.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 11:35 AM

How did he steal your fence? Sounds like a good story. Perhaps not as nuanced as the buried freezer chests under the sundeck, but still, interesting.

Do you use SPRINT? I had to wait a few days last summer to replace our phones because they were transferring our account over to a new server or system. They do it by regions or banks of account numbers or something, a few percent of their whole system at a time. I think I had to reestablish some of my account information after that also. But I've gotten a couple of nice discounts out of it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 09:03 AM

Good God.

I was perusing the "Legals" in the this morning's paper (I do this because sometimes there are things the City is doing that are relevant to the Library) and...and...

my neighbor's house is being sold at a foreclosure auction.

The guy to the east, the architect, who stole my fence. I don't get along with him (she's quite nice), and he has a yard full of "toys" but still...foreclosure?

If anyone wants to pick up a very nice house on a golf course for about $185K (US) I know of a good one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 08:50 AM

Good bye,
You piece of crap,
You've made it clear,
It's time to die, phone
You'va failed,
Your sounds are weak,
Your hinges break,
So it's good-byue, phone!
I need
Something robust,
That never stalls,
Or asks me why, phone.
But more,
Much more than this,
I want an I-I-I-I-I-phone.



Frank Sinnestra
Top of the Slops
1949


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Oct 07 - 12:00 AM

Whyncha just ram the Tootsie pop up his ass, Rapaire? There's a good fellow.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 08:50 PM

My cell phone is breaking at the hinge. I want to buy a new, "ruggedized" one that meets a MILSPEC. It will cost a bit, but it should last a while.

My account "cannot be accessed" so that I can buy it. Seems like it's "down for routine maintenance" or "unavailable because [I'm] being switched over to another system and it will be two days...."

I have been working now for danged near a 10 days straight without a break except to eat and sleep.

I ain't in a good mood to be be told that I can't buy a replacement cell phone, especially by a 20 something sucking on a Tootsie Roll Pop.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 06:19 PM

Nothing sadder than the falling of a trampled tomoato, or the trampling of a fallen tomato, whichever.

I am glad your ear has been properly sucked, now. It does make the world look a little rosier, I daresay.

Rapaire, you shouldn't put too much stock on things you cotton to or don't. We here in California don't hold with cottoning much.

In the early days of radio there was an old-timer interviewed as to what he thought about it. He said, "I don't hold with it.". The interviewer asked him, "What do you mean?"/

He replied, "I don't hold with furniture that talks!"

In the day, this was a real side-splitter -- right up there with "Take my wife--please!".




A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 04:40 PM

Well, the ENT guy cureated my ear, yessiree he did. It was an infected hair follicle (that sounds so much more dignified than pimple) and he got out his little ear vacuum thing and made a roaring sound in my ear for a couple of minutes and cleaned and drained it. The swelling has reduced a great deal and I feel almost human again.

Human enough, in fact, to put in my call to the insurance folks about the roof. Big storm came through in May and I'm only now getting around to reporting the damage. I was working on getting a sick kid cured in May, I wasn't fooling with shingles. But, I figure I'll try to get this taken care of before the rainy season. (I hope they don't trample my fall tomatoes next to the house).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 04:10 PM

Out here in Idaho we don't cotton to them PREversions like "curating," so y'all watch yer mouths (or fingers, as the case may be).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 03:51 PM

Few People realize that Amicus Curiae had a doctorate in curating (commonly abbreviated DC -

that and the fact that A. C. DC was a member of King Louis's court explains the "ball gown don"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 03:16 PM

Lo! how the Mother of us all is kept alive,
With truth, and posts 20 thousand, 85.
Drink up your glasses, and your ball-gown don.
And watch your Asses, as BS rolls on.

Amicus Curiae IX, Keeper of Ye Royale Whimsy
Court of Louis XVII, Algiers, 1808


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 03:14 PM

Amedo Avogadro's got YOUR number, Amos!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 01:12 PM

Odd sentiment coming from one who trades in books. Although, I suppose, you could put a book on a bumper, and glue it in place. Wouldn't be the same as a real bumper sticker, with its vivid visual impact, nor a real book, with its depth of thouoght an dportability. Ni bête, ni ange. A grim bastardization of two great pinnacles of our culture.

You have a really nasty imagination, Rapaire. :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 12:48 PM

If you can't put it on a bumpersticker it ain't understandable.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 10:26 AM

In other news:

THE 2007 NOBEL PRIZE IN PHYSICS WILL BE AWARDED TO Albert Fert
(Université Paris-Sud, Orsay, France) and Peter Grünberg
(Forschungszentrum Jülich, Germany) for the discovery of giant
magnetoresistance, or GMR for short. GMR is the process whereby a
tiny magnetic field, such as that of an oriented domain on the
surface of a computer hard drive can, when the proper read head is
brought nearby, trigger a large change in electrical resistance,
thus *reading* the data vested in the magnetic orientation. This
is the heart of modern hard drive technology and makes possible the
immense hard-drive data storage industry. Fert and Grünberg
pioneered the making of stacks consisting of alternating thin layers
of magnetic and non-magnetic atoms needed to produce the GMR
effect. GMR is a prominent example of how quantum effects (a large
electrical response to a tiny magnetic input) come about through
confinement (the atomic layers being so thin.); that is, atoms
interact differently with each other when they are confined to a
tiny volume or a thin plane.


Aren't we glad and grateful to these men?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 08:58 AM

I thought it was your left ear. No?

Well, there is nothing on worth hearing just now, anyway. So you have time to get it cleared up. I hope it gets fixed. A constant pain in the rear makes you walk funny.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 08:54 AM

It's that bouffant hairdo. Bugs have crawled into your ear and eaten around behind it and are now trying to eat their way out via your eardrum. I know, because this happened to someone at work's aunt's cousin's best friend's boy friend's acquaintance, who happens to be a hairdresser's assistant and he heard about it from his employer's nurse's doctor's brother's veterinarian's kennel cleaner. You should have given that hairstyle up in the 1960s, but it's too late now, probably, because all the hairspray has solidified into a mass even a bullet won't penetrate. This isn't all bad, because thousands of years from now archeologists will be able to examine your hair long after the rest of you is dust. In fact, you hair will survive the eventual collapse and re-Big Banging of the Universe. And you'll show up at Judgement Day balder'n a coot, because your hair won't be able to make it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 12:15 AM

Well, MOM, I'm about back to square one. The ear isn't any better, it's getting worse again. Gotta get in to the ENT tomorrow for sure. This is a pain in the rear.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Oct 07 - 12:12 AM

Given the opportunity...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 10:58 PM

I do know about her sister. Ummmmmmm-UM! Now, THERE was a REAL woman! Why, I've heard tell, up at the Legion Hovel, about the time she...no, I can't tell that. In fact I can't any of it. After all, a lady is a lady.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Oct 07 - 05:55 PM

Quite so.

A.


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