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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 27 Sep 07 - 12:19 AM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 09:01 PM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 07:10 PM
Rapparee 26 Sep 07 - 06:31 PM
Little Hawk 26 Sep 07 - 06:21 PM
Acme 26 Sep 07 - 06:16 PM
GUEST,Gluon 26 Sep 07 - 06:05 PM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 06:05 PM
Little Hawk 26 Sep 07 - 04:39 PM
beardedbruce 26 Sep 07 - 04:07 PM
Little Hawk 26 Sep 07 - 04:05 PM
MMario 26 Sep 07 - 04:02 PM
beardedbruce 26 Sep 07 - 03:47 PM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 03:32 PM
MMario 26 Sep 07 - 01:12 PM
Rapparee 26 Sep 07 - 12:42 PM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 12:37 PM
MMario 26 Sep 07 - 12:18 PM
Rapparee 26 Sep 07 - 11:21 AM
Acme 26 Sep 07 - 10:29 AM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 10:11 AM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 09:31 AM
Rapparee 26 Sep 07 - 09:03 AM
Amos 26 Sep 07 - 12:34 AM
Acme 26 Sep 07 - 12:19 AM
Rapparee 25 Sep 07 - 09:33 PM
Little Hawk 25 Sep 07 - 09:28 PM
Acme 25 Sep 07 - 09:23 PM
Little Hawk 25 Sep 07 - 09:17 PM
Rapparee 25 Sep 07 - 09:06 PM
Little Hawk 25 Sep 07 - 08:30 PM
Amos 25 Sep 07 - 08:28 PM
beardedbruce 25 Sep 07 - 07:30 PM
Rapparee 25 Sep 07 - 06:29 PM
Amos 25 Sep 07 - 05:11 PM
Little Hawk 25 Sep 07 - 01:34 PM
Amos 25 Sep 07 - 01:30 PM
Rapparee 25 Sep 07 - 01:28 PM
MMario 25 Sep 07 - 12:50 PM
Little Hawk 25 Sep 07 - 12:34 PM
Acme 25 Sep 07 - 11:52 AM
Rapparee 25 Sep 07 - 11:47 AM
Amos 25 Sep 07 - 09:52 AM
Rapparee 25 Sep 07 - 09:26 AM
MMario 25 Sep 07 - 08:44 AM
Acme 24 Sep 07 - 11:25 PM
Rapparee 24 Sep 07 - 09:06 PM
Little Hawk 24 Sep 07 - 06:44 PM
Amos 24 Sep 07 - 05:46 PM
Rapparee 24 Sep 07 - 05:25 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Sep 07 - 12:19 AM

he is not a captain of truth. Just a boson.

Not even that. He's that rarest of family jewels, he's one of the privates.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 09:01 PM

Gluon, you will recall, has a knack for imposing relationships on assorted fermions, but he is not a captain of truth. Just a boson.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 07:10 PM

That's just because the clerk was nearsighted and thought she was applying fer a Union soldier's widder's pension.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 06:31 PM

Gluon vouches for my veracity. And I have papers showing that Mom did indeed adopt Beardedbruce on April 3, 1896, in the District Court of the District of Columbia.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 06:21 PM

Nice recovery, Amos! ;-) We gotta get you in goal for the Toronto Maple Leafs next season.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 06:16 PM

MMario said MOM adopted Brucie, didn't she?

And BB said AMOS was the one representing himself as seeking facts...

"Given the low index of veritas, I have to submit you falsify your own assertions in the instant!!"


The answer is "No, MMario, I think he's still the poor redheaded stepchild. He doesn't get it, regarding the nature of this BS thread. From pure, unadulterated Beef, that is." It happens, even in the best of families.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Gluon
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 06:05 PM

BARK!!!


BARK!!!


BARK!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 06:05 PM

Aw, BRuce, you really know how to stick a monkey wrench in a gearbox, doncha? Look a little further and you will find my emark at Rapaire was a rejoinder to his assertion that he never makes stuff up. I make no such claim. But when I make stuff up, I don't pretend it's Gawd's own truth.

As for Mister Keats, you must be talking about the poet Keats, while I was speaking about the eldest son of a collateral branch of the family who, in roughly the same time period, _did_ have a grand tour through France, Italy, Greece, and Egypt, and was inspired by it to write _bad_ poetry which he could not get published; threatened with starvation he became a haberdasher and lived to a ripe old age of 89. He is credited with the first improvement to the beaver since the original design.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 04:39 PM

Yes, I know... ;-) Heh!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: beardedbruce
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 04:07 PM

AMOS was the one representing himself as seeking facts...


"Given the low index of veritas, I have to submit you falsify your own assertions in the instant!!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 04:05 PM

You may have done Amos' self-image irreparable damage with that last post, BB. Be a little more considerate in future. ;-) Factuality is not essentially what we are after on this thread, you know.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 04:02 PM

MOM adopted Brucie, didn't she?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: beardedbruce
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 03:47 PM

Amos

Re veritas

"If his wife had ever found out how much he went into hock buying that "genuine antique picture of Attic dancing girls" from Mustapha Keiropolous, during Keats' "grand tour", she would have killed him"

1. Keats never married
2. He saw the Urn at the British Museum- He never owned it.
2. He never had a "grand tour" - He went to Rome to try to cure his illness, and died there.



When Keats was my age he had been dead for 25 years.

But he did write 64 of the best sonnets in the English language.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 03:32 PM

Given the low index of veritas, I have to submit you falsify your own assertions in the instant!! :D

Keats was not a good speller and he actually can thank that for the preservation of his life. If his wife had ever found out how much he went into hock buying that "genuine antique picture of Attic dancing girls" from Mustapha Keiropolous, during Keats' "grand tour", she would have killed him. So she never learned how much he owed on a Grecian urn.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 01:12 PM

I've always wondered whether or not Keats got into trouble for scribbling all over antique pottery. Talk about a graffiti artist!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 12:42 PM

In Ode On A Grecian Urn Keats wrote

Beauty is truth, truth beauty,?that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.


And I am the most beautiful guy who's ever existed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 12:37 PM

Rapaire is speaking of the kind of truth indicated in the expression, "Truth is in the eye of the beholder". A sort of Colbert-with-some-books kind of truth.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 12:18 PM

T.Ruth, sister to T. Rex.

Correct?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 11:21 AM

Sir, I have ALWAYS told NOTHING but the Truth. Sometimes I have given the reader or listener more than their money's worth by tell a Truth-and-a-half or even a Double Truth. Once in a while I will even go whole hog and tell a great big Multiple Truth. But I have never, ever, told an Untruth, for to do so would place me among The Politicians.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 10:29 AM

Hey, MOM, they're resurfacing the street in front of my house. It's really noisy out there, and liable to be stinky, but at least I saw what they were up to before I pulled into my driveway. I parked up the block on a side street so I won't get my nice white truck all dirty with their road tar. (This way, if I ever get around to washing the dirt off, it won't leave behind conspicuous dark spots of oil.)

I will have to walk across the street, or maybe walk on the grass down to the bridge and then cross and walk up the other side so I don't get this stuff on my shoes also.

Trouble with the higher crown they're putting on the street, when we get heavy rains I'll get more water washing up on my front lawn and flower beds. (I am at a T intersection, and when the downhill flow from the stem of the T hits the cross bar, at my yard, the stem water pushes the crossbar water out of the street up onto the lawn.) I guess I'll have to go put in some kind of edging or build up a small berm at the curb. I've been thinking about doing that anyway, but this may be the road "improvement" that pushes me to do it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 10:11 AM

OR, if you do not make them up, you are reporting someone else's delusions as your own; a sort of psycho-plagiarism, appropriating unreality from others and then mis-owning it. Interesting case study could be made of it, I suppose. Reminds me of an old Punch joke:

"It's these damn butterflies, doctor!! They're all over me!!"

"Vell, don't brusch dem off on ME!!"

I wonder if that might be the secret of deeply persistant patterns of aberration? Obviously the right ownership of a viewpoint is part of the truth about it, so if you have deep-seated packages of thoughts and pictures you have misappropriated from others -- parents, the dogcatcher, babysitters, whatever--it would be really hard to get to a clear understanding of them.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 09:31 AM

You are mistaken, sir. You DO make them up, more often than not.

IF this seems unthinkable or unreal to you, you are on the wrong meds.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 09:03 AM

I jist reports the facts, ma'am, I don't make 'em up*.

































*Well, hardly ever.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 12:34 AM

Pity on our suffering sister,
Pulled the skin right off her blister!
Now her agony's abetted,
And her shoes are badly wetted,
Now, with painful feet, her limp'll
Hide with scowls her famous dimple.
Let it heal, in just a while,
So we again may see her smile.
And let us send her, straight from Natchez,
Several cases of them patches.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Sep 07 - 12:19 AM

Rapaire has effectively added the Ewwww! factor to gloves. I was thinking of little patches of moleskin on a sticky backing for feet. In shoes or boots. Works great. And that sticky stuff pulls the top of the blister right off when you stop walking around at the end of the day. . . (perhaps another ewwwww factor to consider. . . )


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:33 PM

True, they certainly are chic. But few people know that they are made from moleskin condoms left over from that fad a few years ago. The gloves can be manufactured with less expense if the fingers are already made, you see.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:28 PM

Yes, moleskin gloves are extremely chic, aren't they?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:23 PM

Did they tell you that another fine product you could come up with in this enterprise is moleskin? Don't worry about blisters ever again with your operation going in full swing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:17 PM

Yes, I feel that the great days are just ahead for me...I may soon get to meet Maureen McTeer and Mila Mulroney. I may get to trade jokes with Right Honourable Members on Parliament Hill. These are the salad days coming up, I can just feel it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:06 PM

This could turn into a job with the Canadian government. I can see it know: Little Hawk, Minister of Mountainous Molehills. A budget of billions, a staff that numbers well into the tens, meetings year-round in every village and town in Canada, a private plane to whisk the Minister to and from those meetings, a coat similar to this one to ward off the Chill Of The North....

Yes, an experienced molehill-to-mountainer has a vibrant future ahead of him.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 08:30 PM

Amos, you prick, I'll get you for that... ;-)

I have been busy with my little spoon. I have combined 13 molehills into a sizeable heap of dirt, but not yet what could fairly be called a mountain.

And it's too dark now to continue.

(sigh)

Oh, well, there's always tomorrow!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 08:28 PM

AN awesome spoon, to be sure. Fit for spooning with a very large Other.

BTW, I believe Abraham Lincoln also came from Kentucky.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: beardedbruce
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 07:30 PM

look about one page down for the big spoon...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 06:29 PM

Out in the yard with his little spoon, sitting in the dirt....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 05:11 PM

IT's so nice when someone comes up withh something to absorb his attention.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 01:34 PM

LOL!!!!! By God, MMario, you are onto something there!

Yes, I bloody well can make mountains out of molehills. Been doing so for years.

I can see that it's going to be a busy and very satisfying afternoon.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 01:30 PM

MWAhahahahahahaha......


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 01:28 PM

...in a wagon rut.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 12:50 PM

well, get busy and make yourself a few mountains!


Surely making a mountain out of a molehill isn't beyond you, is it?

After all, the "news" media manages to do it frequently! And newscasters are lower then the bellyskin of a road-killed snake!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 12:34 PM

What I have here is molehills. On the lawn. Lots of them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 11:52 AM

There's no place to hide, so where are you going to run?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 11:47 AM

RUN!! There are TWO of Them!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:52 AM

I heard from my cousin Gabe, the sculptor. He looks exactly like me, in the unpredictable toss of the gene cup, and is like an alter-ego parallel alternate universe identity -- he builds boats and sculptures and gets to do a lot of the things I would love to be doing if I weren't doing the things I am doing.

We talked for two hours on the phone. This is not like me.

But he is.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 09:26 AM

Bannock range to the west, Pocatello range to the east, and the Snake River Plain to the north. To the south is the Portneuf Gap, through which the Bonneville Flood came a few years back, creating the SR Plain, the Columbia River, etc., and leaving the Great Salt Lake as a remanant of its passing.

We set a record low for the date as the high temp yesterday: 51 F. Today the high is supposed to be about 65 F. The mountainsides are washed in the scarlet of the mountain maples and the brilliant yellow of the aspen.

Fall as done arrived.

(And I heard from my old friend Marlene! She and her husband have removed from Chicago to Durban, South Africa. She says it's a bit of a change....)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 25 Sep 07 - 08:44 AM

huh! You're just used to them brash upstart *young* mountains. Now a mountain is still a mountain even when it's old and worn done from the centuries of geological toil.

Like the Allaghenies and the Adarondacks. Or the Appalachians.

Give me a mountain with some age to it!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Sep 07 - 11:25 PM

Mountains? What mountains? Haven't seen mountains in a coon's age. The only mountains around here are submerged below the limestone left over from when the Gulf came up this high and various geologic shifts. They find metamorphic minerals in the middle of the state and up on the panhandle from some of those unseen mountains. Gotta head hundreds of miles west of here to see REAL mountains, and they aren't as real as the real mountains I grew up with, the Cascades and the Olympics. (Can't hardly imagine any more living in a house where I could see both ranges, off each side of the front porch, but I could, in two different houses I lived in.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Sep 07 - 09:06 PM

Yup. All them things and folks came out of Kentucky. Except maybe Crockett -- he lived in Tennessee and died in Tejas.

But...THERE'S SNOW ON THE MOUNTAINS!!!

S-N-O-W, snow!! It's not even 25 past September!

Question: What has 36,000 legs and an IQ of 34?
Answer: The student body at U. of Kentucky.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Sep 07 - 06:44 PM

How about Davy Crockett and Daniel Boone? They came out of Kentucky at some point, didn't they?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Sep 07 - 05:46 PM

Well, and a couple of fine representatives of top-flight horseflesh, and the very word "bluegrass", and Robert Penn Warren, who was the only man to win Pulitzers for both poetry and literature.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Sep 07 - 05:25 PM

Question: What's the best thing to ever come out of Kentucky?
Answer: I-65.


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