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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 25 Oct 06 - 05:47 PM
Amos 25 Oct 06 - 05:43 PM
Rapparee 25 Oct 06 - 04:31 PM
Amos 25 Oct 06 - 04:19 PM
Rapparee 25 Oct 06 - 02:50 PM
MMario 25 Oct 06 - 02:28 PM
Amos 25 Oct 06 - 02:11 PM
Acme 25 Oct 06 - 01:47 PM
JennyO 25 Oct 06 - 01:11 PM
Rapparee 25 Oct 06 - 01:00 PM
Bunnahabhain 25 Oct 06 - 12:48 PM
autolycus 25 Oct 06 - 12:35 PM
Rapparee 25 Oct 06 - 12:00 PM
Acme 25 Oct 06 - 11:32 AM
Amos 25 Oct 06 - 11:07 AM
Acme 25 Oct 06 - 10:17 AM
Rapparee 25 Oct 06 - 09:38 AM
Amos 25 Oct 06 - 09:28 AM
Rapparee 25 Oct 06 - 09:26 AM
JennyO 25 Oct 06 - 07:08 AM
Acme 24 Oct 06 - 11:38 PM
Amos 24 Oct 06 - 11:31 PM
Rapparee 24 Oct 06 - 09:37 PM
Bunnahabhain 24 Oct 06 - 07:11 PM
Rapparee 24 Oct 06 - 05:40 PM
Amos 24 Oct 06 - 05:01 PM
Rapparee 24 Oct 06 - 03:33 PM
Amos 24 Oct 06 - 03:26 PM
Rapparee 24 Oct 06 - 03:21 PM
Rapparee 24 Oct 06 - 12:45 PM
Amos 24 Oct 06 - 11:18 AM
Acme 24 Oct 06 - 10:44 AM
Rapparee 24 Oct 06 - 10:41 AM
Amos 24 Oct 06 - 09:41 AM
Rapparee 24 Oct 06 - 08:18 AM
Bunnahabhain 23 Oct 06 - 11:22 PM
Rapparee 23 Oct 06 - 09:34 PM
Rapparee 23 Oct 06 - 09:16 PM
Amos 23 Oct 06 - 08:20 PM
Bunnahabhain 23 Oct 06 - 08:03 PM
Amos 23 Oct 06 - 06:14 PM
Bunnahabhain 23 Oct 06 - 05:41 PM
Amos 23 Oct 06 - 04:40 PM
Rapparee 23 Oct 06 - 02:14 PM
Amos 23 Oct 06 - 01:53 PM
Rapparee 23 Oct 06 - 11:30 AM
Bunnahabhain 23 Oct 06 - 11:22 AM
Amos 23 Oct 06 - 09:58 AM
Acme 23 Oct 06 - 09:43 AM
Rapparee 23 Oct 06 - 09:27 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 05:47 PM

One thing you should know:

THE PERIODIC TABLE OF BARYONS has now been supplemented with several
heavyweight members. Like the addition of two new elements (116 and
118) to the chemical periodic table, the new members of the baryonic
periodic table are unstable and ephemeral, but their observed
existence serves to expand our understanding of matter in the
universe.

The new baryons, the heaviest yet with masses around 5.8
GeV, were sifted from trillions of proton-antiproton collisions
conducted at an energy of 2 TeV at Fermilab. According to the
toolbox of the standard model, all matter is assembled from a family
of six leptons or a family of six quarks. Among the leptons, only
the electron is of account in ordinary atoms, and among the quarks
only the up (u) and down (d) quarks help to fill out protons and
neutrons. Thus the proton is really a u-u-d quark troika while the
neutron?s lineup is d-d-u. But one can imagine other baryons
(particles made of three quarks) made of different quark
combinations, or with different spin values (the proton and neutron
both have a nominal spin value of 1/2).

Although they can be made
artificially in particle collisions, baryons containing the other
quarks---strange (s), charm (c), bottom (b), or top (t)---are
unstable and quickly decay. Still, to understand the strong force
that governs nuclear matter, physicists strive to create and measure
all those other candidate baryons. (For a picture of the baryon
hierarchy see http://www.aip.org/png/2006/270.htm )


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 05:43 PM

In exchange for that bit of amusement, good Rapaire, be sure and click on this link for your high entertainment of the day.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 04:31 PM

I found it again! High speed connection is best, and you'd best turn your speakers on.

Now you'll know the truth....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 04:19 PM

Easy to follow where once none dared to tread
When one who dares has boldly gone ahead.
If you may dream it, go, then, and begin it!!
Action has courage, wit and magic in it!!

Gertie Jo-Ann Faust,
Letter to the Editor
Waukegan Express archives, September, 1929


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 02:50 PM

2.7 seconds. This is on a plain ol' Cat5E shootin' out on a wireless T-3-equivalent microwave setup to an OC-3 backed by T-3 copper for redundancy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 02:28 PM

well Amos - you have me beat - it took almost 54 seconds to display the entire thread. Of course I am hidden under the skirts of the Evil Queen Bess (content filter) and a proxy, and working on an elderly win98 machine.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 02:11 PM

I dared.

I went where common wisdom warned it was not safe to go. I scorned the cautious advices of friends and family, threw caution to the winds to drift where it might, and went forth. And dared.

I survived and have returned, unscathed.

I actually clicked on "Printer Friendly" on the Moab.

In 3.5 seconds I was presented with an orderly screen showing the thread from the beginning.

(I do have a fast company connection, though.)


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 01:47 PM

If you were a foolhardy sort with a VERY FAST Internet connection you could click on the "printer friendly" link in this thread, but it would take a while to format all fourteenthousandsevenhundred (plus or minus) messages to the correct order. Further foolishness of printing it (even double-sided) would take several reams of paper. Your reading speed may vary, according to screen or paper.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 01:11 PM

And when she gets straightened out again with all the posts in order, you will probably find her even more disorienting...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 01:00 PM

Unfortunately, MOAB was scrambled along with the rest of Mudcat during The Great Scrambling Disaster of 2005. Therefore, you are more than welcome to read all of Mom, but you might find it somewhat disorienting. But then again that seems to be the nature of Mother: disorientation.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 12:48 PM

Assume we have in the order of 14700 posts.
Assume to read each post, and to understand its full significance, you would need somewhere between 30 and 60 seconds. This is an average, to allow for the quips, lengthy poetry, and gluon inspired temporal messes.

This therefore means an outsider would need 5 to 10.2 days to read the entire thread. Us in the know, however, know you can extrapolate the whole of MOAB, indeed the whole universe (whichever is larger) from a few posts. Doing this gets you to the conclusion that






      and it's really that simple.


Now what does that teach you, if not ask a silly answer and get a silly question.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: autolycus
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 12:35 PM

Excuse me but how long would iy take to read this thread from the beginning at average speed?




    Ivor


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 12:00 PM

We currently have slots open on our band for a guitarist/other stringed instrument player if you're interested, Amos. We need a lead female vocalist, too. The name of the band is "The Vagrant Pimps."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 11:32 AM

You could construct quite a good band with this start, and furthermore, you could start out by playing at the joint down the road--Mortice and Tenon.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 11:07 AM

You and your buddies Rigor and Algor -- the Mortis Brothers -- why you oughta form a band, if you wanna make money. Kinda like the Ungracious Dead that made so much back in the other decade whichever it was. "Rapaire and the Mortis Brothers". You can play road-kill horn and they can play flat 12-string and electric can opener.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 10:17 AM

Before that happens, someone will head over to Rigor Motors and buy a hearse to transport him away where he won't do any harm.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 09:38 AM

Well, of course not! You'd turn blue, and then post-mortem lividity would set in, and rigor mortis, and algor mortis, and all sorts of disgusting things. Finally, well, you don't want to know about your skin slipping off and the explosion of your intestinal gases and stuff.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 09:28 AM

Ain't a-gonna hold my breath on it, I tell ya thet.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 09:26 AM

Alone, so alone....

That'd make a good song. Lessee.

Alone, all alone
By the old mill stream (gotta get that country image in there)
All alone in a crowded room (and the urban angst & ennui)

That's enough. Don't want to overdue it.

Okay, here's another coming...Yeah, yeah! I can flesh it out later....

She went down last October (? Lightfoot used November, stick to Oct.)
In a pouring, driving rain
The skipper he'd been drinkin'
And the mate she felt no pain (might want to make mate male)
Piled up on Five Mile Rock and she was dealt her awful blow (ain't right yet)
And the "Exxon Valdez" settled low (use different name for ship!!)

Gotta work on these. Might be money in 'em, which I will, of course, share with Mom and the kids.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 07:08 AM

Up you go Mom - looks like your children are all slumbering so it's up to one of us in the Antipodes to give you a lift.

I've got a good movie for you to watch next Tuesday night - "The Life and Death of Peter Sellers" with Geoffrey Rush is premiering on Foxtel then - I was rather interested to see it when it came out, but missed it, so I'm looking forward to it. There'll be hot chocolate and snacks, as usual, and a nice comfy sofa bed!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 11:38 PM

I forwarded this already. Good one.

Moonglow now has a sore throat. Poor kid has been snakebit the last couple of weeks. She's on amoxil for a bacterial infection, but her blood work is looking better. (We'll take what we can get!) She's catching up in her classes, after taking last weekend off from work.

Oh--I'll forward her this bit of humor. She'll love it. And now that she's 18, you know what she is. . .



















she's a registered Democrat!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 11:31 PM

Or, "Democrats use bookmarks, while Republicans use earmarks."

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 09:37 PM

This was sent to me:

The difference between Democrats and Republicans:

Democrats use bookmarks.

Republicans prefer their pages bent over.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 07:11 PM

14641!

As to those showers, remember your coat or unbrella and they'll stop bothering you...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 05:40 PM

I shower every so often, need it or not. Physical dirt does not long adhere to me!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 05:01 PM

Imputation by projection will get you no-where, old bean. Very old bean. You are the one who was fascinated by the possibility -- i merely facilitated your nightmare. Come clean.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 03:33 PM

I myself? I don't use public bulletin boards for that sort of thing. That is not to say that I would stop YOU from using them. I mean, it's okay with me as long as both you and the bulletin board are old enough and there's mutual consent and all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 03:26 PM

Ya just HAD to go back and check, huh? LOL!!!

Now, since you brought the subject up, by trying so hard NOT to, what kind of information would you expect to find on a pubic bulletin board?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 03:21 PM

Thank goodness! I remembered to put the "L" in "public."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 12:45 PM

Right now, we're installing a 42" screen in the public area. Connected to a computer it will act as an electronic bulletin board.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 11:18 AM

They could make a little flashing sign come up when someone has poured over 100 nickels into the same bandit machine, that says "Face it, you're on a losing streak. Go read a book in our Library Lounge and try again later."


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 10:44 AM

Perhaps you should discuss it with them. A grant for an extension of library services.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 10:41 AM

If you mean the tax base that supports this Library, I can answer in one short word:

HAH!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 09:41 AM

Rapaire:

Are these gambling casinos part of your Base?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 08:18 AM

The Bannocks have the Western Casino and the Shoshones have the Eastern one, up about 10 miles north of here on the reservations. The Western one is off of Interstate 86 and the Eastern one off of I-15. The Fort Hall Shoshone-Bannock Reservation gets you no matter what Interstate you travel on.

Good folks, up there, mostly. Like everyone else including the Scots.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 11:22 PM

It could have been the Sheepeater wars....


Glad to see it wasn't just us with silly names for the one sided adventures anginst natives in the 19th century


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 09:34 PM

In the interests of full and complete disclosure, I actually stopped four trains (they thought there was another on the tracks) and restarted the Bannock War. And at 5:30 the folks at the Mill heard the "whistle," saw the steam, and quit for the day three hours early.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 09:16 PM

Well, after a visit to the emergency room, I can state with complete authority that, yes indeed, you belch smoke. In fact, the mouth is not the only bodily orifice to send smoke signals.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 08:20 PM

You are so right. I should never have mentioned it....come to think of it I have been entirely too reckless with advices and suggestions on this thread and I will tone it down forthwith. We must be careful, after all. One never knows, does one?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 08:03 PM

You shoudn't have brough it up at all then. Keeping people safe from themselves is a full time job, you know....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 06:14 PM

I'd be careful about letting hi think that, Bunn-me-lad. He's likely to try it out. That would put the brakes on in a big way!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 05:41 PM

You'd be fine, so long as you stayed well away from naked flames for a few days afterwards....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 04:40 PM

I didn't say it wouldn't hurt you. I don't know whether it would be a painful death or not.

If you find out, let me...oh, never mind...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 02:14 PM

So you're saying that drinking brake fluid won't hurt me? And if I also had some swimming pool chlorine I could belch smoke?

COOL!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 01:53 PM

A similar warning to those who would like to experiment with pool chlorine and brake fluid. A lousy drink, and it ruins the braking fluid, as wlel as making an awful smoke bomb.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 11:30 AM

The old makers in the States did the same thing, wetting the powder with whiskey and then seeing if the alcohol would burn off and "poof!" the powder. I'd even demonstrated this myself with (legal) grain alcohol).

However, the Legion is concerned with those who might do something like stir a cup of gunpowder into a half-gallon of whiskey and then try to drink it or shoot it or both.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 11:22 AM

Never mix alcohol and gunpowder. It makes a lousy drink, and your gunpowder gets wet and won't work.

Therefore demonstarting your alchol is less than 100 proof. What is the legion playing at drinking that kind of stuff, it might as well be fruit juice?

Knowing the old field test for alcohol levels would be useful for something, eventually. Gunpowder soaked in 100 prof alcohol still burns, any weaker it doesn't. The exicsemans test was to test it and then to add more alcohol or water as needed to get to 100 proof, and so see how much tax was due on it....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 09:58 AM

Or possibly psylocybin?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 09:43 AM

Mom's gonna strip search Rapaire next time he heads out to the back yard by himself. She's afraid that he's playing with matches out there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Oct 06 - 09:27 AM

This information is passed down from son to father to son to daughter to mother to the lady behind the bar to wife to grandson to nephew to the girls upstairs to Anne Landers.

Yes, it has all been gathered into The Idaho Legion's Guide To Surviving In The Great Outdoors When You're Nekkid And Only Have A Pickup Camper Full Of Gear And Stuff And A Full Tank Of Gas But You've Run Plumb Out Of Drinks Except Water, also know to outdoorsmen as "The Emergency Charmin."

Here's another tip:

If you're lost, start a fire, the bigger the better. The smokejumpers and hotshot crews will find you in no time and can often be touched for spare change. Of course, this won't work in the winter so start an avalanche and block an Interstate highway with it. Don't stand in front of the avalanche, and always stand upwind from the fire.


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