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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 23 May 11 - 11:58 AM
Rapparee 23 May 11 - 10:09 AM
Amos 23 May 11 - 09:35 AM
Acme 22 May 11 - 11:51 PM
Rapparee 22 May 11 - 09:11 PM
Amos 22 May 11 - 08:40 PM
Rapparee 22 May 11 - 08:17 PM
gnu 22 May 11 - 07:59 PM
Rapparee 22 May 11 - 06:49 PM
Amos 22 May 11 - 03:19 PM
Amos 22 May 11 - 11:43 AM
Amos 21 May 11 - 11:15 PM
Rapparee 21 May 11 - 10:22 PM
Rapparee 21 May 11 - 01:22 PM
Amos 21 May 11 - 12:42 PM
gnu 21 May 11 - 12:30 PM
Acme 21 May 11 - 11:22 AM
gnu 21 May 11 - 07:36 AM
Rapparee 20 May 11 - 11:42 PM
Rapparee 20 May 11 - 03:01 PM
Amos 20 May 11 - 02:44 PM
Eiseley 20 May 11 - 01:58 PM
gnu 20 May 11 - 01:04 PM
gnu 20 May 11 - 01:03 PM
Amos 20 May 11 - 11:23 AM
Eiseley 20 May 11 - 10:32 AM
Rapparee 20 May 11 - 09:43 AM
Eiseley 20 May 11 - 09:22 AM
MMario 20 May 11 - 09:15 AM
Rapparee 19 May 11 - 10:52 PM
Eiseley 19 May 11 - 10:28 PM
Rapparee 19 May 11 - 09:29 PM
Acme 19 May 11 - 07:04 PM
gnu 19 May 11 - 03:37 PM
Amos 19 May 11 - 02:50 PM
Amos 19 May 11 - 10:28 AM
Rapparee 19 May 11 - 10:17 AM
MMario 19 May 11 - 08:55 AM
Rapparee 18 May 11 - 07:47 PM
Amos 18 May 11 - 04:20 PM
Rapparee 18 May 11 - 02:07 PM
Amos 18 May 11 - 09:53 AM
Acme 18 May 11 - 09:45 AM
Rapparee 18 May 11 - 09:31 AM
Acme 17 May 11 - 11:34 PM
Rapparee 17 May 11 - 10:07 PM
Amos 17 May 11 - 09:47 PM
Rapparee 17 May 11 - 09:15 PM
Amos 17 May 11 - 04:05 PM
Rapparee 17 May 11 - 03:38 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 May 11 - 11:58 AM

No, I hooked it up myself, and we used it to watch a NEtflix film that was very touching and interesting -- a Swedish film called "Mother of Mine". We mostly use the TV for watching movies, Jon Stewart and an occasional history-making event or some such important thing. So "what's on TV" in the broadcast sense doesn't impinge very much.

I'd have to sell my soul before I would start watching most of the regular drivel available. Of course, no-one's offered me the right price yet...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 May 11 - 10:09 AM

Considering what's on TV these days, I have to ask: did you get it hooked up?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 May 11 - 09:35 AM

Obviously there is none more upright, strait, nor Virtuous than the Manne of Booques. So, Madam Eiseley, spill ye the beans!! Enquiring minds want to know!

We went to the San Diego Zoo with the Choreographer, which was most enjoyable; we rode the skyride. My foster-son had his 35th birthday--his bride kidnapped him and took him to Las Vegas. Greater love hath no bride.

ANd we got our TV replaced! Yay!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 May 11 - 11:51 PM

So Eiseley has a whale of a tale? Do tell!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 May 11 - 09:11 PM

I just want you all to get the straight facts. I don't quite understand what happened myself, so it's better that she tell you. I truly want you all to know the truth, straight from her.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 May 11 - 08:40 PM

It is so unspeakably cruel, Raparree, to be a tantalus, constantly tickling the curiosity with false hope and half-baked implications. For fie!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 May 11 - 08:17 PM

No, it's best if you hear it from her. She's even written a little song about it -- a sorditty, if you will.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 22 May 11 - 07:59 PM

"It's a pretty sordid story."

What did she sorely do?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 May 11 - 06:49 PM

I don't know if I should tell on Eiseley or not. It's all still pretty much under wraps and confidential and the cops aren't talking. Yet.

Maybe it'd be best to hear it from her own fingers. It's a pretty sordid story.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 May 11 - 03:19 PM

The times of Mother are hard-pressed
And mother's heart too often stressed
As all her children wander aimless
Making remarks she might find shameless
But still, her soul is softened when,
One by one they come back again
To ease her old maternal stress
With new inventions of BS.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 May 11 - 11:43 AM

I can see my hangnails
hanging in the sky
My elbow's up there with 'em
flying close by
And my knees,
if you please,
Are floating way
Above the trees
I've bid adieu to both my ears
But me, I am staying right here
'Cuz this Second Coming's second rate to me.

CHO:This rapture has been ruptured
The show is kinda of lame
If one of them scruffy angels asks,
Don't give him your right name.
The roundup's weak and boring
And I don't care for the company
Oh this Second Coming's second rate to me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 May 11 - 11:15 PM

With both knees?? They didn't even uplift yore hangnails? Man, what a second-rate Second Coming!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 May 11 - 10:22 PM

Well, in spite of the rapture I'm still here and so is Mom.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 May 11 - 01:22 PM

The MRI showed I have intact ligaments, thankyouverymuch! My left knee has been a little (and I mean a little) troublesome for quite a while, but last September I fell down the last three basement steps (thin carpet over concrete) and the poor thing took most of the shock of the fall. Then it tried to stick itself in my left ear by going around my waist. This was slightly uncomfortable and it's been acting up ever since.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 May 11 - 12:42 PM

Or spending too much time down on them, praying for uplift?
Maybe your ligaments got Raptured when you weren't paying attention.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 21 May 11 - 12:30 PM

Or loaded liberryians?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 21 May 11 - 11:22 AM

Those knees benefit from not being knocked around for years and years. Did you blow yours out by tripping over loaded library carts?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 21 May 11 - 07:36 AM

I care... somewhat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 May 11 - 11:42 PM

Gee, Mom. It looks like, once again, I'm the only one who cares.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 May 11 - 03:01 PM

Cortisone and lidocaine cocktail. The next thing is an injection of some sort of gel. Then surgery. Then a new knee. Then amputation, a pegleg and a life of piracy on the Portneuf River. Rum-dee-dum and bottle of Yoo-Hoo! or however that pirate thing goes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 May 11 - 02:44 PM

Better the kneecap than the skullcap, I suppose. As long as it wasnt just someone aiming badly!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 20 May 11 - 01:58 PM

I think his kneecap fell off and they needed to inject some superglue to stick it on again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 May 11 - 01:04 PM

Were you in the Corti Zone Rap?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 May 11 - 01:03 PM

Take a shot in the dark.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 May 11 - 11:23 AM

Why were you given a shot in the knee?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 20 May 11 - 10:32 AM

I hope you chose one with Scooby-Doo or Spiderman on it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 May 11 - 09:43 AM

This one was intended for me. They always say you don't hear the one that gets you. I didn't hear this one. The doctor was talking too much. Now my knee hurts and I've got a boo-boo bandage on it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 20 May 11 - 09:22 AM

I did my quarterly duty for the Red Cross.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 20 May 11 - 09:15 AM

Rap - the "drools" part rings a bell....*grin*


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:52 PM

Some kid bit you and you got a rabies shot, huh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:28 PM

I was shot in the arm today.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 May 11 - 09:29 PM

I was shot in the knee today.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 May 11 - 07:04 PM

I blame a dyslexic brain. :)

Out to dig in the dirt this evening. Still building The Wall.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 19 May 11 - 03:37 PM

With me it's usually my fat head that doesn't correct my fat thumbs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 May 11 - 02:50 PM

you="your". God spare me fat thumbs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:28 AM

Because you repressed whacked-out neuroses all point to this being just the sort of thing you would do.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 May 11 - 10:17 AM

Because it's all true? Because I am The Fount Of Truth? Because my every world and thought literally drools with Truth Overflowing?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 19 May 11 - 08:55 AM

Why do I believe this particular story?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 May 11 - 07:47 PM

I had a guy in my platoon who used to say that when I tried to awaken him. Every morning it was a fight to get him up. One time when he said it I replied, nicely and lovingly, "You know, Bob, I'm waited for you to offer that and I would REALLY like to do that. But Bob, you should know that I don't like to eat my meat raw." and I tossed a lighted Zippo on his bed.

Never saw someone get up so fast, and never had a bit of trouble thereafter. He KNEW I was nuts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 May 11 - 04:20 PM

Well, no, I wasn't, since you had already pulled out the teeth in question. But since you bring it up, good freynde and Manne of Bookes....eat me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 May 11 - 02:07 PM

Amos, are you suggesting that we cannibalize our neighbors? On top of all of their other problems? For shame!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 May 11 - 09:53 AM

Your neighbors to the far north-east? That's an interesting problem, and certes, something to sink your teeth into.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 May 11 - 09:45 AM

You'll make more if you start selling body parts for transplant. Have a spare kidney?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 May 11 - 09:31 AM

Well, it's all that I have. I need to sell it to buy a crust of moldy bread so that I can support myself and my wife. Really, I pulled it out with a pair of pliers last night. If I'm very lucky I can get enough to stave off foreclosure for a couple more days so that at least for a tiny while longer we won't be thrown out in the blizzard with our few miserable possessions while the landlord tears down the house so we can't move back in, like happened to our neighbors in the picture.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 May 11 - 11:34 PM

Both the tooth and the library foundation give me a sinking feeling.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 May 11 - 10:07 PM

Nah. A dentist took is out maybe 8 or 9 years ago. It had been part of me for about 20 years, but I'm not that attached to it anymore, especially since it was replaced by newer dental work.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 May 11 - 09:47 PM

Well, jeeze, man; ya trying to discourage all the groupies? Or were you planning to replace it with a plastic one?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 May 11 - 09:15 PM

Well, I've decided that it's time I sold my gold tooth.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 May 11 - 04:05 PM

For which, of course, they would have to establish a sinking fund...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 May 11 - 03:38 PM

I think that some politicians would think the best career path for women would be as breeding stock so males and unmarried females can work harder and longer so that the bosses will get richer. Otherwise, librarianship would be an excellent career choice. But ask Eiseley.

As for the concrete, well, this is a secret I found out by accident. The foundation and slab for the public library here (and it's not especially big) were poured without taking the weight of the structure into account. As a result it's sinking into the earth at an average of 0.25 inch per year. The city doesn't want it known because it would be responsible for digging down to bedrock and installing jacks and pillars underneath.


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