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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 21 Apr 09 - 10:49 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 09:18 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 07:39 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 07:32 PM
Little Hawk 21 Apr 09 - 06:46 PM
gnu 21 Apr 09 - 06:36 PM
Little Hawk 21 Apr 09 - 06:20 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 06:11 PM
Little Hawk 21 Apr 09 - 06:05 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 05:58 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 05:57 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 05:51 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 05:20 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 05:05 PM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 04:23 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 04:17 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 04:08 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Apr 09 - 04:05 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 03:55 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 03:38 PM
Acme 21 Apr 09 - 03:32 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 03:16 PM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 03:10 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 03:00 PM
Little Hawk 21 Apr 09 - 02:59 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 02:54 PM
Rapparee 21 Apr 09 - 02:48 PM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 02:13 PM
Little Hawk 21 Apr 09 - 01:58 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 01:31 PM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 01:30 PM
Little Hawk 21 Apr 09 - 12:57 PM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 10:30 AM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 10:10 AM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 10:04 AM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 09:50 AM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 09:48 AM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 09:45 AM
Amos 21 Apr 09 - 09:38 AM
MMario 21 Apr 09 - 09:19 AM
Little Hawk 20 Apr 09 - 11:12 PM
Amos 20 Apr 09 - 10:22 PM
Acme 20 Apr 09 - 10:19 PM
Little Hawk 20 Apr 09 - 09:03 PM
Little Hawk 20 Apr 09 - 08:53 PM
MMario 20 Apr 09 - 07:13 PM
Amos 20 Apr 09 - 04:34 PM
Amos 20 Apr 09 - 04:14 PM
Rapparee 20 Apr 09 - 04:08 PM
Rapparee 20 Apr 09 - 03:43 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 10:49 PM

I was in a hurry earlier so didn't give more information. William Macy does a marvelous job reading this poem:

'The Drunken Driver Has the Right Of Way'
by Ethan Coen

The loudest have the final say,
The wanton win, the rash hold sway,
The realist's rules of order say
The drunken driver has the right of way.

The Kubla Khan can butt in line;
The biggest brute can take what's mine;
When heavyweights break wind, that's fine;
No matter what a judge might say,
The drunken driver has the right of way.

The guiltiest feel free of guilt;
Who care not, bloom; who worry, wilt;
Plans better laid are rarely built
For forethought seldom wins the day;
The drunken driver has the right of way.

The most attentive and unfailing
Carefulness is unavailing
Wheresoever fools are flailing;
Wisdom there is held at bay;,
The drunken driver has the right of way.

De jure is de facto's slave;
The most foolhardy beat the brave;
Brass routs restraint; low lies high's grave;
When conscience leads you, it's astray;
The drunken driver has the right of way.

It's only the naivest who'll
Deny this, that the reckless rule;
When facing an oncoming fool
The practiced and sagacious say
Watch out ? one side ? look sharp ? gang way.

However much you plan and pray,
Alas, alack, tant pis, oy vey,
Now ? heretofore ? til Judgment Day,
The drunken driver has the right of way.

Excerpted from 'The Drunken Driver Has The Right Of Way' by Ethan Coen. Excerpted by permission of Crown Publishing Group/Random House.

This interview and the poem were on April 16, 2009 on NPR's All Things Considered.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 09:18 PM

Shucks, Amos. Them girls ain't got nothin' on some of them old-time cowboys.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 07:39 PM

This rappary
Is frippery.
The slope you slide
On's slippery!
I'd rather run
A frappery
Than buy this use
Of Rapparee.


Oh--by the way--HEre's some folks who use their time to much better benefit than we. Worth cheering for.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 07:32 PM

Ya wanna hear me read them Angle-Sexy pomes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 06:46 PM

Ummm...yeah...

Far out, man. Good stuff, eh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 06:36 PM

Pass it over here man.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 06:20 PM

And that's because I am informed
Not cleaving to the witless norm
Because I know that Rapaire
Is meant to rhyme with cannery
It does not rhyme with solitaire
It does not sound like fox and hare
It sounds a note most stridently
By which we call it "Rap-a-REE"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 06:11 PM

Gee, Little Hawk,
For all your talk
It seems to scare
You to write "Rapaire"
Or else, you find
It cannot rhyme
When pronounced in glee
As "Rapparee".



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 06:05 PM

Your words are just a mockery
When next' the glorious Rapaire
So go ahead, you varlet, flame us!
We're unimpressed by Ignor-Amos

;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 05:58 PM

This idle frippery will not
Explain the folly you have wrought
Or justify your loud complaint
By claiming things are so which ain't.

Come closer to the present, there
To learn the lesson, rich and rare
Of how to spell words like "Rapaire".


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 05:57 PM

Gif mon biž on węteręlfadle, žonne beož him ža hand-
    nęglas wonne and ža eagan tearige and wile locian nižer.
    Do him žis to lęcedome: eoforžrote, cassuc, fone niožo-
    weard, eowberge, elehtre, eolone, merscmealwan crop,

    fenminte, dile, lilie, attorlaže, polleie, marubie, docce, ellen,
    felterre, wermod, streawbergean leaf, consolde; ofgeot mid
    ealaž, do hęligwęter to, sing žis gealdor ofer žriwa:
    Ic benne awrat      betest beadowręda,
    swa benne ne burnon,      ne burston,

    ne fundian,      ne feologan,
    ne hoppettan,      ne wund waxsian,
    ne dolh diopian;      ac him self healde halewęge,
    ne ace že žon ma,      že eoržan on eare ace.
    Sing žis manegum sižum: Eorže že onbere eallum hire

    mihtum and męgenum. žas galdor mon męg singan on
    wunde.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 05:51 PM

On his dagum sende Gregorius us fulluht 7 Columba męssepreost com to Pihtum. 7 hi gecyrde to Cristes geleauan. Žęt synd žonne węrteras be noršum morum. 7 heora cyng him gesealde žęt igland že man Ii nemnaš. žar syndon fif hida. žęs še man seggaš. Žar se Columban getimbrade mynster, 7 he žarr węs abbod .xxxii. wintra 7 žar foršferde. ža he was .lxxvii. wintra. Ša stowe habbaš gyt his yrfnuman. Suž Pihtas węron ęr gefullode of Ninna biscope. se was on Rome gelęred. His mynster ys Hwiterne on Sanctus Martines naman gehalgod. žar he resteš mid manegum halgum. Nu sceal beon ęfre on Ii abbod, 7 na biscop. 7 žan sculon beon underšeodde ealle Scotta biscopas. for žan že Columban was abbod, na biscop.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 05:20 PM

THe Mother Bastard of our HEll
IS one who will not learn to spell,
Who long on paunch, and short of hair,
Cannot pronounce the plain word "paire"
Or "air" or "lair" or "fair" or "Nair"
Or even climb a simple "stair".
He thinks like someone from Paree
That all these should end in "-aree"
And gets offended, loud and puffy,
ANd starts behaving downright stuffy
If you should hold him to convention
And disallow his wylde invention.
Ah, fie, and pox, malodourous air
Upon the lungs of yon Rapaire!
Let him remain in Bastard's Hell
Until he learns how people spell.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 05:05 PM

Blessed Lucrezia Bellini is the patron saint of bastards.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 04:23 PM

Did you forget the "of"

If so - then it could be Bastard of Hell's Mother

or Mother of Hell's Bastard

or Mother Hell of Bastards (Mother Superior of The Convednt of St. Bastard)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 04:17 PM

And "Mother All BS Threads" becomes "Bastard Hells Mother".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 04:08 PM

The boring space of not-Rapaire
Is bereft of song and joy and glee.

There. MUCH better.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 04:05 PM

Hi, Mom! Did you kow that "ten ton clam" is an anagram for "malcontent"?

I would've posted this information to the Malcontent thread, but it has "desired Papa".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 03:55 PM

The boring space of not-Rapaire
Is said to be exceeding rare.


Again and again and again he mispronounces my nom-des-claviers. Pronounced correctly there would be no rhyme AND the meter would, in the words of the immortal Alexander Pope, "suck."

Just imagine how he would feel if I were to write something like

The boring space of not-Amos
Is filled with lint and similar dross.

One can only sigh and shrug one's shoulders that such wanton wantin' of good sense exists in the world.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 03:38 PM

We interviewed JA Jance yesterday.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 03:32 PM

Before I forget: Etan coen's 'Recreational' Writing Project

William H. Macy reads at the end of the interview. "The Drunken Driver Has the Right-Of-Way"

This was on last Thursday's All Things Considered.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 03:16 PM

The boring space of not-Rapaire
Is said to be exceeding rare.
A place without his strident leer
His windy tales, and watery beer.
A place without his endless books,
And pompous tales, and dirty looks.
A place beyond the Rapaire-fences,
Where words are clear and keep their senses,
Where all that is, is not misowned,
And all the world does not act stoned.
Oh, there's a place for such as I
Where simple blue describes the sky,
A world where folks don't have to fear.
In any case, it is not Here.

Skanetales Philopopolous
Songs from Anti-Matter
Baddemouthe and Flyng
Portsmouth NH, 1987


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 03:10 PM

For a place that has some of the kindest people I know living within it's boundaries, S- - - - - - -s is a hotbed of prejudice, snobbery and callousness.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 03:00 PM

No thanks to Rapaire.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 02:59 PM

By the time I left Skaneateles and returned to the relative paradise that is Canada, Mario, I truly hated the place. I still shiver a little inwardly whenever I hear or see the word "Skaneateles".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 02:54 PM

Thanks, Rapaire.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 02:48 PM

ALL "Realities" are true because I have made them so. Even the "Reality" in which I do not exist is true -- boring as all hell, but true nonetheless.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 02:13 PM

Skaneateles will do that to a person.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 01:58 PM

Well, yes, Mario, I am usually willing to look at all sides. I try to be tolerant, and I'm far more tolerant now than I was in my youth (when it's easy to see things in terms of black and white only). Thank you for reminding me of that.

Amos - Yes. I guess I'm like Walt Whitman in that respect. I may indeed contradict myself because I contain multitudes. ;-) (I think that's how he put it, wasn't it?)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 01:31 PM

All three realities were simultaneously true, LH, and still are. It's purely a matter of filter which ones you prefer to experience.

Let me add that much as I am delighted at your restored participation in our various discussions, as a friend I should point out that you are backsliding on your commitment to win your life back by shunning Internet activities.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 01:30 PM

LH - you may disagree; but as far as I have seen you most assuredly do *NOT*

Assume yours is the "ONE TRUE WAY" and everyone else is automaticallly:
a) wrong
b) therefore unworthy
c) stupid and or uneducated

There's a difference between marching to a different drummer and insisting that because YOU do not march to a particular cadence, no one may march at all.

Does that make sense?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 12:57 PM

Heh! I actually had the DEasby Principle in my mind even as I was typing those words, MMario. What you need to do, Amos, is study a very lengthy and contentious thread all about Susan Boyle, and then you will understand. ;-D

I grasp the DEasby principle quite well, because having been a loner, and a "brain", and a rather unconventional kid altogether, I often found myself in the position of disagreeing with virtually the entire rest of the student body in my formative school years.

This could indicate either that:

1. I was brilliant, and I was surrounded by conventional morons and social conformists, neanderthals, fools, and lunkheads.

or

2. I was a pretentious and insecure little prat determined to live a life of martyrdom and misery, ignored by the girls and laughed at by the boys, scorned and rejected by my peer group, and forced to seek solace in books and solitary interests.

or

3. God is out to get me.

Heh! Oh, the vagaries of a lonely and mispent youth. Well, I shall leave it to posterity to judge what I was and was not.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 10:30 AM

AH, so.   Clearly a reference to an interaction I avoided....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 10:10 AM

You did read the qoute above the statement, didn't you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 10:04 AM

"To those not familiar with the early volumes of the English Herd Book, and who know not its lack of completeness in extending to almost time immemorial its lineage of the race, it may appear strange that so many short bull pedigrees are found in it ; also that many hundreds of them contain but a single sire, or only a sire and grandsire, with no dam or grandam by name, or further reference ; and that several hundred bulls are recorded by name only, with no pedigree whatever, or reference to any other recorded animal. But it must be remembered that the names of only a very few animals can be traced further back than a hundred and twenty years, and even the names of their breeders to a not much earlier date ; yet every bull at the time of his record was considered a Short-horn, both by his breeder and the compiler of the Herd Book, unless otherwise noted, and by the Short-horn public was accepted as such. Following that basis, the descendants of such bulls, through Short-horn cows, have been admitted as belonging to the Short-horn family by the prevailing opinion of breeders. "

I just thought you'd like to know.

Your reference to Ms. Easby escapes me still, but never mind.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 09:50 AM

It's possible She is listed there, but *I* certainly am not about to ask her.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 09:48 AM

I assume you do not mean the D. Easby mentioned in "Pedigrees of English Short-horn bulls, to which American Short-horns trace (1874)". There's not a lot available of any coherent sort under that handle.

Pray, explicate.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 09:45 AM

D. Easby.

Explanation enough?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 09:38 AM

The WHAT??? 'SPlain yourself Loozy!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Apr 09 - 09:19 AM

They are quite sure they're right. If 999 people disagree with them, it just gives them the delight of knowing that they are "in the know" and are surrounded by others who are not in the know

Also known as the "DEasby Principle"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 11:12 PM

(chuckle)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 10:22 PM

A fizzy metaphysick, a dose more than a trickle
To remedy a violent rash of thoughts meta-fiZICKle.
And get yon Little Hawk out of
His ponderous Meta-Pickle!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 10:19 PM

LH, you need a dose of meta-physic, and be sure to call a doctor in the morning. (A Ph.D.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 09:03 PM

Amos, anyone can arbitrarily divide the Universe in two just by seeing it that way. He may not convince anyone else, but he will be convinced himself, and that is all most people need, isn't it? ;-) They are quite sure they're right. If 999 people disagree with them, it just gives them the delight of knowing that they are "in the know" and are surrounded by others who are not in the know...a very special and delectable role for any ego to find itself in. There's nothing quite so exclusive as knowing what others don't know, after all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 08:53 PM

"totally "good" would be too nauseating for words"

Actually, no, it wouldn't. It would be marvelous. But it would not be typical of this dimension of existence which appears to be founded in duality. Given duality, one comes up with all kinds of notions about good and evil.

If one were existing in a dimension of single Unity, however, (rather like a hologram where every least part contains the totality...then I think it would be safe to see that it would be "all good" to use that common expression, because nothign would be divided from, and thus potentially against, something else.

I have read much about enlightenment, and it seems to have a great deal to do with a unitive consciousness which sees everything as One. Such a consciousness does not divided separate things into "good" and "evil". It sees one Unity and experiences peace and joy.

You won't find that here. You won't find it in discussions here. No chance....because all the people who ARE discussing here imagine that they are separate from everyone else around them. As long as they do imagine it that way, that is what they experience. Separation.

And what is the infamous "original sin"? I would assert that it is the belief in separation. Separation not only from "God", but also from everything else and everyone else. Out of that arises all the trouble and sorrow in our lives upon this planet (or wherever we take that attitude when we leave this planet).

"Totally good", Stilly, IS the true nature of existence as far as I'm concerned, and it's wonderful, but I would not expect to convince anyone of it! ;-D No more than I would expect to convince all the fools in the world who are presently robbing, killing, stealing, raping, and fighting wars that there is indeed a better and happier way.

They do it because they believe in separation, and nothing can convince them otherwise. They might as well be blind, deaf, and dumb, as well as insane.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 07:13 PM

That cvould be kinda cool, tho' - we could get gluon to help build a wormhole bridge between the two halves of the universe.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 04:34 PM

Moooooooom!!!!!

Rapaire wants to cut the universe in two!! Tell him to quit it!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 04:14 PM

Please do not make rash assertions until you have actually cut the Universe in two.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 04:08 PM

But if you cut a planaria in two it will grow into two planaria which have the same learning memories as the first planaria.

Have you considered that the Universe As We Know It might simply BE a planaria?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Apr 09 - 03:43 PM

I left to go drink with Martin Buber, a much better philosopher, in my opinion. And my opinion is, obviously all that counts.


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