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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Donuel 09 Sep 08 - 03:19 PM
Rapparee 09 Sep 08 - 02:25 PM
Amos 09 Sep 08 - 09:35 AM
Rapparee 09 Sep 08 - 09:22 AM
Acme 08 Sep 08 - 11:47 PM
Amos 08 Sep 08 - 08:19 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 08 Sep 08 - 01:29 PM
Amos 08 Sep 08 - 11:59 AM
Acme 08 Sep 08 - 11:22 AM
Amos 08 Sep 08 - 11:13 AM
Amos 08 Sep 08 - 10:55 AM
MMario 08 Sep 08 - 10:28 AM
Amos 08 Sep 08 - 10:19 AM
Amos 07 Sep 08 - 11:08 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 07 Sep 08 - 09:57 PM
Amos 07 Sep 08 - 07:59 PM
Acme 07 Sep 08 - 05:54 PM
Amos 07 Sep 08 - 05:36 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 07 Sep 08 - 05:32 PM
Amos 07 Sep 08 - 12:18 AM
Acme 06 Sep 08 - 11:45 PM
Little Hawk 06 Sep 08 - 10:24 PM
Amos 06 Sep 08 - 09:54 PM
Little Hawk 06 Sep 08 - 09:00 PM
Amos 06 Sep 08 - 07:04 PM
Amos 06 Sep 08 - 02:13 PM
Acme 06 Sep 08 - 01:33 PM
Donuel 06 Sep 08 - 09:53 AM
MMario 06 Sep 08 - 08:43 AM
Acme 06 Sep 08 - 01:35 AM
Amos 05 Sep 08 - 02:42 PM
MMario 05 Sep 08 - 12:43 PM
Amos 05 Sep 08 - 11:22 AM
Acme 05 Sep 08 - 10:22 AM
Acme 05 Sep 08 - 01:30 AM
Amos 04 Sep 08 - 09:54 PM
Little Hawk 04 Sep 08 - 09:51 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 04 Sep 08 - 08:48 PM
Acme 04 Sep 08 - 04:03 PM
Amos 04 Sep 08 - 01:59 PM
Little Hawk 04 Sep 08 - 01:53 PM
Amos 04 Sep 08 - 01:23 PM
Amos 04 Sep 08 - 11:23 AM
MMario 04 Sep 08 - 11:16 AM
Amos 04 Sep 08 - 10:47 AM
Amos 03 Sep 08 - 05:44 PM
Amos 03 Sep 08 - 02:10 PM
Little Hawk 03 Sep 08 - 01:31 PM
Amos 03 Sep 08 - 12:24 PM
MMario 03 Sep 08 - 11:39 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 09 Sep 08 - 03:19 PM

a kayak trip
a href="http://usera.imagecave.com/donuel/kayak.jpg">http://usera.imagecave.com/donuel/kayak.jpg


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Sep 08 - 02:25 PM

All of MY double entendres I usually have with cream and maybe a scone on the side, except now they're getting too expensive so I'm switching to latte (which is French for "overpriced cuppa coffee").


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Sep 08 - 09:35 AM

All my flagrant double entendres are ars gratis artis, and fully intended, yes.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Sep 08 - 09:22 AM

Now it can be told.

I was walking along the street on my way to the soda shop when a black car pulled up. Four men, all dressed in black and wearing those reflective sunglasses seized me and before I knew it I had been handcuffed, gagged, and was on my way to who knew where!

Oh, I had a pretty good idea who they were. Thugs, thugs working for the BI -- the international secret society that tries to control the world, most recently with inane TV game and reality shows: the Bavarian Illiterati.

We drove for quite some time and finally, at an undisclosed location, I was unceremoniously tossed into a black "stealth" helicopter and flown to prison camp on the Pacific coast. There I was put into a "sweat box" where I had to endure days of mild temperatures and high humidity.

When they found that this wasn't going to break me I was put into a cell in which I could almost stand upright or almost lay down. It was lit by a single fluorescent tube day and night while the guards outside played the music of "Petra" and the recordings of the Western novels of L. Ron Hubbard continuously (I was mistaken in my earlier posting).

Finally, I was brought up before the Big Man himself: Gladhander, who shook my hand until I thought my arm would fall off and my hand crushed. Then he flung me to his waiting minions and simply said, "Make him talk!"

I would have been happy to do so, only they never told me what they wanted to know. They may have all have made a mistake and didn't want to admit it, especially since they kept calling me "Georgie Boy" and "W".

Anyway, under the most harrowing conditions and most awful conditions I managed to escape and now I am home.

Hi, Mom! I'm back.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 11:47 PM

Amos,

Did you intend that flagrant double entendre for your best MOAB buddy Rapaire? I can't imagine you would possibly think . . . well, what it is possible to read if one is accustomed to double entendres!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 08:19 PM

I am sure they are still missing you, and feeling bad about it.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 01:29 PM

Of course I am! That's why I had to escape! And Amos -- I had to us a sea kayak made of sticks, chewing gum, and old newspapers smeared with used cooking grease. My paddle was a 2 x 4. I hope that I'll never have to do that again, especially under mortar fire from the guards on the cliffs above.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 11:59 AM

Perhaps you are more important to the fate of Western civilization than you realize.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 11:22 AM

O, T, H, and I are the only ones that are rally reversable with that particular font, but I didn't think anyone would pay attention.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 11:13 AM

A server of sooth smoothies, so to say.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 10:55 AM

Oh, you smooth soother, you. And sooth-speaker, too!





A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 10:28 AM

the finest kind; the ones that make you look twice!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Sep 08 - 10:19 AM

Stilly:

On closer inspection, you were fooling us. The W and X you showed us were not backwards, or their thinner strokes would have come first (from left to right). They are NORMAL!!!!! What kinda BS is that???


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Sep 08 - 11:08 PM

Hell, man, we knew that. And by stealing my little theme of sea kayaking, you have jkust proven you are a latent Republican. Whyncha just come out of the closet so you can respect yourself?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 07 Sep 08 - 09:57 PM

I've been sea kayaking, so to speak. It was part of my escape.

And that should have been "MOM" and not "MON".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Sep 08 - 07:59 PM

Besides, why should we be all terrorized just because you found a Font of Mass Distraction to use on us?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Sep 08 - 05:54 PM

We've been busy, MOM understands.

25,200


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Sep 08 - 05:36 PM

Shame-Я-Us!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 07 Sep 08 - 05:32 PM

So. I risk life and limb, torture beyond your wildest conception, to escape and FIND MON HAS BEEN IGNORED since so early this morning that not even God was awake! I swim through pirahna filled waters, crawl through mined mud while the guards' machine gun bullets splat around me, and I find poor Mom has been ignored!

They pulled out my toenails, subjected me to the tickle torture while I was waterboarded, they played the Complete Works of L. Ron Hubbard to a background of Christian rock music for 24 hours a day...and I find this!

For shame, all of you!

I'll shame you more later.

Sorry for their neglect, Mom.
R


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Sep 08 - 12:18 AM

OUt on the cool restless breast of the ocean, before the first light, I launched into the surf, sitting ready and timing the incoming swells until the moment was right, and cutting through them with my prow arching and falling on their shoulders until I was past the breaker line.

Even then, the air was gray, the sea was steely, and the waves chopped this way and that. I made headway against the wind, bearing west and south to the open sea just beyond the cove and the caves that line the bluffs below it. Once there, I could relax and let the low cool wind and choppy sees move me cattycorner into the arch of the cove and down before the bluffs. I broke out a tall car-cup of coffee and sipped, wandering the stream with minor corrections, drifting down before the stern cormorant rookeries and the seal colonies, watching them stir as sun began behind clouds in a hint of morning time hidden in mist.

I rode the swells in close, eyeing them for treachery and timing my turns, along the underpinnings, into the mouths of the gaping caves. When the sea rose up I turned into it, and rod eover it; when it stilled, I let it carry me.

FInally I made my way up wind, across the shoreline, back to the loading beach, and again as I have done before, rode the right wave in at the right time. One almost tracked and turned me, which would have walked me straight into a broach and tumble in another moment, but I fought it off and swung the prow back again, and rode her in to the shallows in the last moment.

It is a lot of work to mount up, and carry the kayak, re-mount it on the cartop afterwards, then bring it down again, clean it and store it and all its paraphernalia, but the moments earned by this effort are golden.

Say Good-Night, Gracie...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 11:45 PM

LH,

It takes no time at all to steal borrow someone else's code and then recite the alphabet, picking out each symetrical letter. The trick was to mix them up a little, to give it a casual air.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 10:24 PM

I doubt that we will ever know.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 09:54 PM

The real question is whether the credence brings about the reality, or vice versa? Where does postulated knowing end and mere perception begin?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 09:00 PM

We can also pretend something real is happening.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 07:04 PM

Alas, Mother declines with age. Thus the Clock of the World rules all our lives. Tick, tick, tick, tick...

But, ignore it. We can pretend something important is happening.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 02:13 PM

Ya know, Still, I worry if you maybe are spending too much time alone, drinking Jolt and writing HTML....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 01:33 PM

It isn't just an ass-backwards Я we can do here--I can do a backward A and O and T and V and U and W and X and H and I and M (in no particular order). . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 09:53 AM

I imagined a novel about a final SUCCESSFUL solution for mankind by establshing a permanent slave state which results in an end of all war.

The slaves were carefully biologically engineered with all the attributes that satisfied every culture and religion...

until a slave shortage resulted in yet another war.

_______________

problem is I suspect this book has already been written.

???


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 08:43 AM

gurk!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Sep 08 - 01:35 AM

Я'nt you the clever boys!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Sep 08 - 02:42 PM

Well, as the dyslexic buccaneer put it, Я, Я, Я!!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 05 Sep 08 - 12:43 PM

>Shame-Я-Us!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Sep 08 - 11:22 AM

I thought he was an Eveready bunny type....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Sep 08 - 10:22 AM

No more news from Rapaire? I wonder if his batteries died.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Sep 08 - 01:30 AM

Naw, just left him out in the middle of the parking lot at Disneyland. Or Six Flags. Maybe his blackberry has the bandwidth to tap into the headquarter's hot spot to send that post.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 09:54 PM

What--abandoned him on the island in Frontierland?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 09:51 PM

Aha! Sounds like Shane has finally managed to somehow arrange that terrible revenge upon Rapaire that he's been planning for so long.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 08:48 PM

Dear Mom:

I am being held captive. I hope to escape soon, if I can avoid the land mines, the electric fence, the killer dogs, and the kill-crazy guards. If I don't make it out by the 15th you'll know I didn't make it and Amos can have my Teddy Bear. Can't write more -- the guards are coming for me again.

Your fave son,
R


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 04:03 PM

I don't believe there is an html code for a backward "R" to make that really suit the level of illiteracy you're referencing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 01:59 PM

Or, given the US influence and general level of illiteracy,

Shame-R-Us!!!!!





A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 01:53 PM

Hey...if we were running a Co-op here, it would be called "SHAME-IS-US", eh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 01:23 PM

...because silence is a defamation of character!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 11:23 AM

Oh, just on general principle.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 11:16 AM

whyfor?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Sep 08 - 10:47 AM

I hope you guys are ashamed of yourselves.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 05:44 PM

I see our Resident Bookmeister has left the building for parts unknown, as of August 30th.

Rapaire, all is forgiven!!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 02:10 PM

Don't worry--the wetware itself is not from WalMart. I got a discount from Edmund Scientific. Ole Chongo will still recognize you as a brother.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 01:31 PM

Sounds like you are right on track. Har.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 12:24 PM

HEy--those were Mom's choice! I wasn't even IN WalMart that day.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 03 Sep 08 - 11:39 AM

Yeah - but you replaced the night lights with those stupid "twinkle" LED's that are enough to trigger Grande Mal.

I think the bulb over the kitchen table is a bit overpowered, the table is starting to smolder.


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