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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

John MacKenzie 20 Feb 06 - 09:58 AM
Amos 20 Feb 06 - 09:57 AM
Acme 20 Feb 06 - 09:53 AM
Amos 20 Feb 06 - 09:49 AM
Tweed 20 Feb 06 - 01:24 AM
Acme 20 Feb 06 - 12:20 AM
Rapparee 20 Feb 06 - 12:03 AM
Amos 20 Feb 06 - 12:00 AM
Rapparee 19 Feb 06 - 11:20 PM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 11:15 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 19 Feb 06 - 10:36 PM
Rapparee 19 Feb 06 - 10:26 PM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 09:53 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 19 Feb 06 - 09:38 PM
Little Hawk 19 Feb 06 - 09:09 PM
Tweed 19 Feb 06 - 09:03 PM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 07:58 PM
Tweed 19 Feb 06 - 07:11 PM
Acme 19 Feb 06 - 07:07 PM
Rustic Rebel 19 Feb 06 - 03:16 PM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 01:34 PM
Rustic Rebel 19 Feb 06 - 01:05 PM
Rapparee 19 Feb 06 - 12:46 PM
John MacKenzie 19 Feb 06 - 11:45 AM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 11:33 AM
Acme 19 Feb 06 - 11:22 AM
John MacKenzie 19 Feb 06 - 11:18 AM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 11:14 AM
Rapparee 19 Feb 06 - 11:08 AM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 19 Feb 06 - 10:58 AM
Acme 19 Feb 06 - 10:48 AM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 10:39 AM
Acme 19 Feb 06 - 10:28 AM
Acme 19 Feb 06 - 10:28 AM
Amos 19 Feb 06 - 08:30 AM
Acme 19 Feb 06 - 01:38 AM
Amos 18 Feb 06 - 09:22 PM
John MacKenzie 18 Feb 06 - 07:05 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 18 Feb 06 - 06:55 PM
Amos 18 Feb 06 - 06:09 PM
Little Hawk 18 Feb 06 - 05:41 PM
Rapparee 18 Feb 06 - 05:37 PM
Amos 18 Feb 06 - 04:38 PM
Tweed 18 Feb 06 - 02:43 PM
Amos 18 Feb 06 - 12:03 PM
Rapparee 18 Feb 06 - 11:35 AM
Acme 17 Feb 06 - 11:01 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Feb 06 - 10:49 PM
Little Hawk 17 Feb 06 - 10:40 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 09:58 AM

What happens to all the oldtrinos Amos?
G.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 09:57 AM

Neutering house animals gives the owner a false sense of geld-edged security.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 09:53 AM

Guilt free gilt or geld?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 09:49 AM

It's a long way from gilding a lily to gelding a pussy. Just ask any Lothario.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 01:24 AM

Geld yore cats and they'll curl up and go right to sleep.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 12:20 AM

They're there to bug the hell out of your cats. That's why the cats run around all night long in the dark, to chase the little tv people. The tv folks have the added advantage of being so full of static (just like on the front of the CRT) that they can give cats static shocks. That's why they arch and spit and dance around under the furniture when you'd really rather they curled up quietly and went to sleep.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 12:03 AM

Oh, yeah. That's possible. I guess somebody's gotta make them Italian sandwiches.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 06 - 12:00 AM

They have night jobs, manufacturing neutrinos.

There ya go.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:20 PM

Oh yeah? Then just tell me where all those little people have been doing when they leave my television every night when I turn it off? Huh? Just tell me that, Mr. Smarty-pants Amos!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:15 PM

Even Joe Sixpack does not believe those teensy figures are "in" his TV set. The most analog-minded antedeluvian Luddite knows that the same program, on the air, is reaching his mother's TV across the street at the same time it is reaching into his. So he knows that an actor is "in" a program which is "on" TV.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:36 PM

Yes, Amos, your SWAG is pretty much in line with my own lame-assed conclusion. But from a purely physical perspective, it would make more sense to say an actor plays in a television program since the program itself appears to take place inside the television set. At least I guess it still does. It's been a while since I've watched television and they may have perfected in-home holographic projection for all I know.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:26 PM

You are also "on the air" if you do radio. You're also "on the air" with television. Ergo, you're "on" both radio and television. This is better than saying you are "in the air" because that brings all sorts of odd images to mind. You can be "in" Mr. Ed, for example, while it's on the air, so with television (and radio plays) you're both "on" and "in" at the same time.

It's like being "on" stage "in" Hamlet.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 09:53 PM

Because television is modeled more closely after radio, in which one is "On the Air", whereas movies follow more closely the tradiition of theater, where one is "in" a play. This is not authoritative, but simply Doctor Defino's SWAG, an acronym meaning "shitty wild-assed guess", whose usage dates to the U.S. military circa 1965.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 09:38 PM

Why do most people say that an actor plays a part in a movie, but on a television program?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 09:09 PM

That's what happens when you hang around too much in the wrong places.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 09:03 PM

That's just nuts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 07:58 PM

There are three related words: Geld as used in Dane Geld, meaning treasure; geld as in horse-castration; and guild. Two of them are closely related in derivation! Guess which.

guild - c.1230, yilde (spelling later infl. by O.N. gildi), a semantic fusion of O.E. gegyld "guild" and gild, gyld "payment, tribute, compensation," from P.Gmc. *gelth- "pay" (cf. O.Fris. geld "money," O.S. geld "payment, sacrifice, reward," O.H.G. gelt "payment, tribute"). The connecting sense is of a tribute or payment to join a protective or trade society. But some see the root in its alternate sense of "sacrifice," as if in worship, and see the word as meaning a combination for religious purposes, either Christian or pagan. The Anglo-Saxon guilds had a strong religious component; they were burial societies that paid for masses for the souls of deceased members as well as paying fines in cases of justified crime.

geld (n.) - "royal tax in Medieval England," O.E. gield "payment, tribute" (cf. M.H.G. gelt "payment, contribution," Ger. geld "money," O.N. gjald "payment," Goth. gild "tribute, tax"), from PIE base of yield (q.v.).


geld (v.) - "to castrate," c.1300, from O.N. gelda "castrate," from geldr "barren," from P.Gmc. *galdu- (cf. O.H.G. galt "barren," said of a cow). The noun gelding (1296) is from O.N. geldingr.

from here.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 07:11 PM

Gelding!!! Obv corse.... that makes much better sense. You know, I thought she was involved in the UK Lady Templars and "guilding" was a secret code word to collect new members.

...and mebbe it is one and the same thing!!! Amos is better with word origins and can probly shed more light on this cryptycism.

Hello Rustic!! About them shorts: No, I let the old ones bond to my ass and add new ones as needed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 07:07 PM

Hey, folks, some of us are pitching in to send Art Thieme a copy of Roxio's latest Easy CD program so he can start burning his cassettes onto CD. I heard from Rap--anyone else want to throw a $20 my way? I'll pick it up and mail it in a few days.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 03:16 PM

'Round, robust, rolly-polly, rotund, rusty, ringwormed and a rump mostly!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 01:34 PM

Hell, at least it keeps 'em short, eh? Unlike some folks I could mention!!

Nice to see ya 'round, RR! (You are round, arent'cha?)...:D

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 01:05 PM

Hey Tweed! Changed your shorts lately?

I have recently noticed a nervous habit of mine has become more prevalent in public.
Biting my toenails.
It doesn't bother me that I do it in public.
It just bothers me that I choose to spit them out at anyone wearing pink.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 12:46 PM

I am simply posting the results of playing rock 'n' roll songs backwards and sideways while upside down.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:45 AM

Oh I wish I were in Acrilan not cotton
New itches then, they would be gotten
Scratch away scratch away, scratch away Acrilan.
by
Hairy Itch Carpet


G


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:33 AM

Yeah...but how badly changed history would have been if Sam had sung,

Acrylic Bully!
Acrylic Bully!
Acrylic Bully!
Acrylic Bully....

Matty told Hatty about a thing she saw.
Had two big horns and an acrylic jaw.
Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully.
Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully.
Hatty told Matty, "Let's don't take no chance.
Let's not be L-seven, come and learn to dance."
Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully
Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully.
Matty told Hatty, "That's the thing to do.
Get you someone really to pull the Acrylic with you."
Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully.
Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully, Acrylic bully...

I don't THINK so.....


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:22 AM

Acrylic, actually.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:18 AM

Wooly Pit Bully by Sam the Sham and the Pharoah Hounds.
G


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:14 AM

Dear gawd, what has become of the fine, knowledgeable, articulate, humorous friend we once had? This dribbling petcock of inane irrelevancy cannot, surely, be the same being?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:08 AM

Hit under the ball to blast a chipshot out of the sand.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 11:04 AM

BiGawd, yer right -- that pitbull does look preppy -- or at least like a jock who attends a preppy school!! LOL Maybe someone trying out for the Cornell gridiron team...rathah!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:58 AM

Paul is dead.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:48 AM

I just sent you a photo. I only got three, the dogs were moving too much and the rest were a blur. And truth be told, that sweater became a dog toy for tug-of-wars because it was so sturdy. They eventually chewed it up and for weeks after giving it to them I found red and blue fibre around the yard in dog poop.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:39 AM

The notion of a preppy pitbull just boggles the imagination.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:28 AM

Well there's an interesting number

11223


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 10:28 AM

BRrrrrrr! Stomp stomp stomp. . . .clunk of a shutting door

Geez, Louise, but it's COLD out there! Damn near slipped in the ice while out breaking an inch of the cold stuff off of the top of the dogs' water dish. (The girls have their own radiator out in the garage--there's no way a pit bull and a catahoula would sit still for wearing doggie sweaters if I tried to put any on them, though I DID jokingly put a red and blue boy's crew neck sweater on the pit bull one day last summer and she looked so preppie!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 08:30 AM

Yeah -- there's an old Nordic saying about never confusing Dane geld with a gelded Dane == or maybe it was an ancient hearthside riddle -- "What's the difference between Hamlet and one of his kroner?"   "One is Dane geld, the other a gelded Dane." It loses something in translation though.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Feb 06 - 01:38 AM

Not to be confused with the historic monetary instrument from Ethelred's day called Dane geld. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 09:22 PM

♪ ♫ Do you remember, when I geld you close ...♪ ♫


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 07:05 PM

Geldfinger, he's the man the man with the minus crutch ♪ ♫

Giok


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 06:55 PM

Is that where "gelding the willy" comes from?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 06:09 PM

First, you have to find the object of the operation; that probably stopped her cold right there.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 05:41 PM

I wonder if she ever succeeded in gelding Winston Wellington-Jones? I suspect not.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 05:37 PM

That's not "guilding", Tweed -- it's "gelding."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 04:38 PM

Well it's good to see ya back, ole Tweed. Hope yer blues is bloozing along in fine form. Penelope did ask after you the other week, but I told her you had gone to Tanzania to look for roots. She seemed quite satisfied with that story. Anyway, I believe she is off raising funds for the Grand Unifying Denial find being raised by the Republicans to get them a big PR firm to come up with ONE explanation that will exculpate everything. They have .75 billion so far in hasty donations from members of the Administration, the Senate, the Congress, the CIA and the NSA.

So we'll see.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 02:43 PM

Little Hawk wonders if I've heard from Penelope...

No, no and no. That pitchfork tongued harpy drove me outta here months ago and I've been afraid to show myself obv late.
Do not, under any circumstance, allow her to find out that I am on the MOAB thread again. She has indicated in the past that she enjoys nothing better than "guilding" things. It is a hobby with her apparently and I'm not sure what that means but it sounds off-center and summat unsettling to my ear.

Tweed


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 12:03 PM

Dear Rapaire:

Either you have been reduced to incoherent babbling -- no long process -- by your recent adventures, or you have told us a great deal more about yourself than we wanted to know.

Your last post makes no sense, unless you are an agent of the Denebean system's infamous Mammalian Gang. If so, I would like to borrow your scout vessel.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Feb 06 - 11:35 AM

I am the Walrus.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 11:01 PM

I recall vaguely that hobbits count using "eleventy."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 10:49 PM

Mom, Tweed came by for a visit while you were resting. Yes, dear, that Tweed. Well, he's been busy over at Tweed's Blues trying to get the soy sauce off the walls. I know, Mom. I don't understand either. Why don't you just get some more rest?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Feb 06 - 10:40 PM

Hey, Tweed, have you heard from Ms Penelope lately?


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