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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 09 Feb 09 - 03:51 PM
Amos 09 Feb 09 - 03:22 PM
Rapparee 09 Feb 09 - 12:44 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 09 Feb 09 - 11:07 AM
Amos 09 Feb 09 - 10:58 AM
Acme 09 Feb 09 - 10:16 AM
MMario 09 Feb 09 - 10:06 AM
Rapparee 09 Feb 09 - 09:00 AM
Rapparee 09 Feb 09 - 08:46 AM
Amos 08 Feb 09 - 11:44 PM
Acme 08 Feb 09 - 11:36 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 08 Feb 09 - 10:02 PM
Rapparee 08 Feb 09 - 09:29 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 08 Feb 09 - 08:17 PM
Rapparee 08 Feb 09 - 06:59 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 08 Feb 09 - 06:38 PM
Acme 08 Feb 09 - 05:53 PM
Rapparee 08 Feb 09 - 05:52 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 08 Feb 09 - 05:19 PM
Janie 08 Feb 09 - 04:54 PM
Amos 08 Feb 09 - 03:42 PM
Rapparee 08 Feb 09 - 02:04 PM
VirginiaTam 08 Feb 09 - 12:53 PM
Amos 08 Feb 09 - 12:20 PM
Rapparee 08 Feb 09 - 12:06 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 08 Feb 09 - 10:28 AM
VirginiaTam 08 Feb 09 - 06:39 AM
Amos 08 Feb 09 - 12:06 AM
Acme 07 Feb 09 - 11:40 PM
Rapparee 07 Feb 09 - 10:30 PM
Janie 07 Feb 09 - 10:22 PM
Rapparee 07 Feb 09 - 10:12 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 07 Feb 09 - 07:44 PM
Rapparee 07 Feb 09 - 06:27 PM
Janie 07 Feb 09 - 05:44 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 07 Feb 09 - 04:58 PM
Janie 07 Feb 09 - 04:20 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 07 Feb 09 - 03:25 PM
Amos 07 Feb 09 - 03:00 PM
Little Hawk 07 Feb 09 - 02:01 PM
Amos 07 Feb 09 - 01:44 PM
Little Hawk 07 Feb 09 - 12:06 PM
Rapparee 07 Feb 09 - 11:25 AM
Little Hawk 06 Feb 09 - 09:58 PM
Acme 06 Feb 09 - 08:17 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Feb 09 - 07:38 PM
Rapparee 06 Feb 09 - 07:06 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 Feb 09 - 06:54 PM
Little Hawk 06 Feb 09 - 06:31 PM
Amos 06 Feb 09 - 06:12 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 03:51 PM

Keira Knightly is the very epitome of elegance, Bee-Dub, and I highly recommend most of the movies she has appeared in. She reminds me a lot of Penelope Rutledge in her general appearance, but she's not quite as aggressively assertive as Penelope (though somewhat so on occasion), and she's a bit younger as well. You can't ask for a more elegant form of beauty than that of Keira Knightly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 03:22 PM

Well, in this case I was referring to the ass of which it was said "the law is one".

In this respect, although I am not an outlaw as far as I know, and if I recall correctly, in my humble opinion, I may be an off-law. It has already been established that I am an in-law, which is neither here nor there, on or off, six of one or half-a-dozen of the other. But I have always been slightly off on the law anyway so I may as well learn to live with it and be the best off-law I can be.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 12:44 PM

Please put it back on, Amos. You'd look strange without an ass. Unless, of course, you mean the kind you can ride and in that case you should say that you're on the floor because you laughed yourself off your ass. Now, the ass could say, "I'm rolling on the floor laughing my Amos off" but...never mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 11:07 AM

The #1 Google Image Search result for "elegance" is a picture of actress Keira Knightley. I've heard her name, but don't watch enough movies to feel qualified to judge on her elegance level.

The #1 Google Image Search result for "inelegance" is this cartoon. I believe that's Michael Moore standing by the box.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 10:58 AM

Abbreviations are for lazy people. I leave them to the feckless and under-employed. I, for example, am laughing out loud, although I am not a lawyer and your mileage may vary. In fact I an rolling on the floor laughing my ass off at some of these recent witticisms.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 10:16 AM

I think we'd all be out-classed by a "politician" (unless it is the unstable variety, called a "Palin." A "Palin" shovels it out in large quantities, but is known to shovel from the bottom of the deck and fling the more toxic material first instead of mixing it up and diluting the toxicitiy.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 10:06 AM

the tauroflop is such a small unit though. Most BS gets measured in herds or most commonly megaherds. There are a million herds in a megaherd, and a thousand tauroflops per herd.

YOu can see that around here, even megaherds are usually inadaquate for measuring the BS. Luckily - the politician (equal to 1 million megaherds) is available for higher rates of BS.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 09:00 AM

And I would be measured in petasolons?

I want to know why BS isn't measured in tauriflops.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 09 - 08:46 AM

How do you plan to abbreviate these "units of measure" without confusing them with others? And upon what basis is the meaure based?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 11:44 PM

Well, I will honor the elegance of the platon in place of sages per morphemic array as units of wisdom, although you have to have the second unit to give character to the rate of flow. I would hazard a guess that 100 insights equals a platon, and 100 platons equals a solon.

I like thinking of posting stupidities in terms of dumkopfs per pica line, because you can compare thread-posters with book authors. In general book authors have more total dumkopfs in a book, but on a per line basis, the thread-mongers take the cake.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 11:36 PM

I'll see you an Astaire and raise you a Charisse.

Or a Kelly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 10:02 PM

More so than ever. None of the others you've listed score more than 30 Astairions on the elegance scale. In fact, some of them sound downright repulsive. Their elegance score is negative. The unit for measurement of lack of elegance is a "Mooron", named in recognition of documentary film maker Michael Moore. "Therblig" scores 87 moorons in the inelegance scale.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 09:29 PM

There are also fardel, farthingale, farsakh, fatt, wyde, wey, demisemiquaver, doppelzentner, halakim, hectopascal, therblig, toise, truss, minutum, and a whole bunch of others.

And you still thing "Platon" is a good measure?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 08:17 PM

A plethron is a square measure of 10,000 Greek feet. I bet it smells really bad.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 06:59 PM

Well,

petabecquerel,
petaflops,
pferdestärke,
pfund,
phot,
picofarad,
picolo,
picomole,
picotesla,
pieze,
plethron,
poiseuille,
poncelet,
pottle,
pud,

are all names for various measurements that begin with P. And I don't find any of them to be really pleasant for pontification.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 06:38 PM

It's called a "Platon" because it is an elegant name. The standard unit of elegance is an "Astairion" (named in recognition of Fred Astaire) and "Platon" gets a score of 95 out of a possible 100 Astairions. It's short, easy to remember, and ends in "on" like a good unit should. The only reason it doesn't score 100 Astairions is that some people tend to spit when saying any word beginning with a "P".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 05:53 PM

I would call that "in recognition."

"Honor" and referents to George W. Bush (such as "Dubya") are oxymorons.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 05:52 PM

So what about us post-modern deconstructionalist Cartesians, huh? And our motto, "Cogito cogito cogito, ergo cogito cogito sum, cogito" where does your little "platon" leave that?

And why is is named after Plato, who basically stole his stuff Aristotle? Why not call it an "Aristotilan" instead? Or a "thrales" after Thrales?

And weren't you positing a "dubyan" after yourself, really?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 05:19 PM

I propose a unit of wisdom to be known as a "Platon", in honor of Plato. The maximum number of Platons in a given statement is one hundred. Descartes' "I think, therefore I am" is an example of a 100 Platon statement. (I'm talking about Descartes' original realization, not some college freshman mindlessly reciting it to pass a Philosophy 101 exam. Within that context, it's only worth 2.5 Platons.)

Of course, it is possible for a statement to exhibit negative wisdom. I further propose a unit of negative wisdom (aka stupidity) to be known as a "Dubyan", in honor of a recently departed head of state.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 04:54 PM

Hence, the birth of MOAB!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 03:42 PM

Well, now, it is not that simple. A single complex post can have large dimensions even though brief, and can throw weights in units of immaturity (dumpkopfs per pica line) at the same time as it demonstrates large numbers of units of wisdom (so many sages per morphemic array).

So it takes deep analysis to derive the correct metrics for any given poster.

And many analysts are easily fooled because they miss the subtle layers and velleities of given word-choices.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 02:04 PM

And you'll be right there with the rest of us, too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 12:53 PM

Ahh so you measure immaturity and stupidity in units too?

By counting number of stupid posts one can determine the relative maturity of a poster?

I am in trouble. I will have a unit age that is in the negative figures.

Sigh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 12:20 PM

I have known some adults about whom I would agree with you, sir.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 12:06 PM

Which is why preschool and kindergarten should be for adults only.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 10:28 AM

Yeah, the nut thing. At the preschool my grandson attends, there's one child allergic to peanuts and another allergic to tree nuts. Since kids tend to share stuff from their lunches, parents are required to mark lunchbags containing anything nutty and the teachers have to make sure all lunches at the table where the allergic kids sit are nut-free in case anything gets swapped.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 06:39 AM

You forgot nuts. Are these treats nut, gluten, sugar and sugar substitute, artifical flavour and vegetable dye free?

Yes... Yes they are... they are rice cakes see?

Pass!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 Feb 09 - 12:06 AM

Helluva thing, for bringing cupcakes!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 11:40 PM

If you tried to take cupcakes to a school classroom today you'd be arrested, the cupcakes would be x-rayed then taken to the lab to be tested for drugs, poison, or narcotics, and you children would be kicked out of school and sent to one of those tough "alternative" schools for the next two months.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 10:30 PM

Hey, they were home made. Besides, I once won a cupcake in a spelling bee -- I spelled "dictionary" correctly and won. Not bad for the fourth grade, huh?

You see, mothers were expected to provide treats for the entire class on your birthday or whenever asked. Since on my birthday the school was usually closed (my birthday was then a High Holy Day) I didn't have a problem. But one brother and my sister did (the other brother also had the foresight to be born on day when the school would be closed). And when your mother has to make treats for 30 to 40 kids she goes for fast and cheap.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 10:22 PM

What a cheesy school you went to, Rapaire. No wonder you're weird and warped.

Cupcake.   Humph!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 10:12 PM

Mom baked cakes and cookies on Saturday mornings while we watched a circus show on TV. Make 'em from scratch, too. During the week she might bake some bread if money so tight we couldn't afford day-old bread at 10 cents a loaf.

I think it would be nice to say, "That really takes the brownie!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 07:44 PM

I never did a cakewalk. I remember cakewalks at elementary school Halloween carnivals, but I never really understood what they were for. I guess I couldn't understand why anyone would pay money to try and win a cake that some stranger had baked. Heck, Grandma baked three or four cakes a week. Cakes were FREE! All you had to do was go to Grandma's house. You didn't pay money for 'em! Money was for candy bars.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 06:27 PM

Bee-dub has a good question here. In grade school we used to do a cake walk and the prize was a cupcake. How come nobody says, "That certainly takes the cupcake!" or "If I knew you were comin' I'd have baked a pie"?? Lots of times I rather have a nice piece of pie Or doughnuts (donuts). Or crullers. Or apfelstrudel. Why a cake?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 05:44 PM

Think "sarcasm", m'dear!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 04:58 PM

So that's where the expression comes from! From winning cakes at cakewalks. WOBH!

But winning a cake at a cakewalk is a good thing while it seems like every time someone says, "Well that takes the cake!" it's something bad. It seems to mean about the same thing as "That's the straw that broke the camel's back."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 04:20 PM

Cuz' they don't hand out banana splits or racks of ribs at cakewalks.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 03:25 PM

Hi, Mom! I have another question. When someone says something "takes the cake", what kind of cake does it take? Does it take a German chocolate cake? How about a devil's food cake? And why a cake? Why doesn't it ever take a pie or a banana split? Why doesn't it take a large rack of barbecued spare ribs with a side of coleslaw and a baked potato?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 03:00 PM

AN interesting formulation you have latched onto there, M. Hawk.

It gives rise to the question, "What constitutes the right way" and "What are the traits of the the 'right' authority figure?"

Plato pondered a good deal about this, and Aristotle carried it on in his studies of Rhetoric.

The predisposition to accept an arbitrary stable conclusion not able to hold up to actual inspection must include the condition--self-postulated and self-assigned, initially--that one needs to be the effect of external sources, and must be vulnerable and inadequate, oneself, as a source of one's own data.

This is a sorry state, and one which authorities love tot take advantage of.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 02:01 PM

I find it puzzling too, Amos, but like I said...

You can be sure of one thing. They had it presented to them at the right time....by the right authority figures...and in the right way. They now take it for granted.

Sometimes people will become deeply disillusioned with their early authority figures...as often happens to teenagers in regards to their parents (and older folks in general), for example...at which point their old set of assumptions will collapse utterly, they will find a brand new set of authorities and assumptions to live by and they will adopt a new set of beliefs, usually with just as much assurance as their previous set. (and just as little solid "evidence")

This can also happen with a young political fanatic who reverses his previous stance. Mussolini, for example, started out as a passionate socialist, but ended up as the ultimate anti-socialist.

Another thing that can happen when a set of personal beliefs collapses is that a person will become bitter and deeply cynical about all forms of belief systems. He will become a professional cynic and debunker of everyone else's beliefs. Such people are not any fun to be around...because they are forever wreaking vengeance on the world in general for the destruction of their youthful sense of trust.

One finds some interesting cases of this in people who have left behind them a church...or a political belief....or a marriage.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 01:44 PM

I am really puzzled how anyone can make an apposition like that comparing the Bible--presumably the King James version--with astronomical observations.

Deep confusions about what a scientific datum is, I guess.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 12:06 PM

Editors tend to be interesting people. I used to write letters to the editor back in the 90s, and eventually it resulted in him hiring me to write columns for the local paper.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Feb 09 - 11:25 AM

Yes, LH. Those people are the ones who write letters to the editor.

Me, I talk with the editor. He's a nice guy, for an editor. At the moment we're talking about comic strips.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Feb 09 - 09:58 PM

Fascinating! People will believe any form of orthodoxy if it is presented to them at the right time....by the right authority figures...and in the right way. They then take if for granted...and they ridicule anyone who thinks otherwise.

Hence, most people in our society believe without question our present popular ideas about Darwinian evolution...which may be entirely right, certainly are part right, but probably are not all the answers...in my opinion. I think there will be further discoveries, and amendments to the theory of evolution, in all likelihood.

Anyway, most people believe it because it was presented to them at the right time....by the right authority figures...and in the right way. They now take it for granted...and they ridicule anyone who thinks otherwise.

A tiny number of people (and I am not among them) believes the geocentric theory presented on that website. Why? Well, it was presented to them at the right time....by the right authority figures...and in the right way. They now take it for granted...and they ridicule anyone who thinks otherwise.

A tiny number of people believe in the "hollow Earth" theory. Why? Well, it was presented to them at the right time....by the right authority figures...and in the right way. They now take it for granted...and they ridicule anyone who thinks otherwise.

Then there are those people who believe in the trickle-down theory, the War on Terror, the benefits of Viagra, the Republican Party, "Jesus Saves", "Mohammed is the one true prophet", the Democratic Party, and the Antichrist.

You can be sure of one thing. They ALL had it presented to them at the right time....by the right authority figures...and in the right way. They now take it for granted...and they ridicule anyone who thinks otherwise.

;-)

And they can all provide "evidence" too! Just ask them. They'll bore you to tears with their mountains evidence if you hang around and listen long enough. They may even convince you...and then you can join with them and ridicule anyone who thinks otherwise.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Feb 09 - 08:17 PM

This site is devoted to the historical relationship between the Bible and astronomy. It assumes that whenever the two are at variance, it is always astronomy?that is, our "reading" of the "Book of Nature," not our reading of the Holy Bible?that is wrong. History bears consistent witness to the truth of that stance.

Well there you have it. Slaps forehead. How could we all have been SOOO wrong for so long? We're so fortunate they put this site up.

VT, two words. Mouse-over.

Invisible writing is a favorite tool of many MOABites. Rapaire is just yanking your chain. Or unpeeling your crayons. Or whatever. It's Friday, that must explain it.

:)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 09 - 07:38 PM

You may be right, Rapaire. They may be freds. But would that explain their belief in geocentricity, or their living in Kansas?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Feb 09 - 07:06 PM

Perhaps they are freds?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Feb 09 - 06:54 PM

So tell me, Mom, have any of the other kids received a wonderful piece of junk mail from The Geocentric Bible Foundation?

The one that says, among other things:

"Astronomers have deliberately ignored fundamental experimental results of the 1870s and 1880s that showed the earth to be standing still."

and

"...the sun... is lierally (sic), physically moving, being carried daily around the earth by the revolving aether or firmament. The earth is abiding, it is stationary."

What I want to know is this: The Geocentric Bible Foundation is headquartered in Kansas. Where'd they get enough money to afford to do a large enough mass mailing that my address in Florida would be included? Is there a sufficient number of fools donating money to them to finance their propaganda campaign, or is there just one or two wealthy fools?

Their website.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Feb 09 - 06:31 PM

That's an interesting concept, Amos. ;-) Gotta love that Chongo, eh? He's got substance!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Feb 09 - 06:12 PM

Actually, Little Hawk's imagination is measured in units of Shane (as the lowest common denominator). Chongo, for example, is only four feet tall, but he's a fifty-Shane figment!!
Shatner, contrariwise, comes over in deci-Shanes.

A


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