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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 17 Jun 06 - 12:27 AM
Rapparee 16 Jun 06 - 11:55 PM
Acme 16 Jun 06 - 11:28 PM
Rapparee 16 Jun 06 - 11:22 PM
GUEST,Nofus 16 Jun 06 - 10:55 PM
Amos 16 Jun 06 - 10:05 PM
Rapparee 16 Jun 06 - 09:33 PM
Little Hawk 16 Jun 06 - 06:52 PM
Bunnahabhain 16 Jun 06 - 06:37 PM
Rapparee 16 Jun 06 - 03:35 PM
MMario 16 Jun 06 - 03:32 PM
Little Hawk 16 Jun 06 - 03:31 PM
Amos 16 Jun 06 - 03:30 PM
Acme 16 Jun 06 - 03:23 PM
Amos 16 Jun 06 - 03:17 PM
Rapparee 16 Jun 06 - 03:05 PM
Rapparee 16 Jun 06 - 02:50 PM
MMario 16 Jun 06 - 01:39 PM
Bunnahabhain 16 Jun 06 - 01:29 PM
Acme 16 Jun 06 - 01:28 PM
MMario 16 Jun 06 - 12:53 PM
Amos 16 Jun 06 - 12:46 PM
Amos 16 Jun 06 - 12:29 PM
Bunnahabhain 16 Jun 06 - 12:21 PM
Amos 16 Jun 06 - 10:17 AM
Rapparee 16 Jun 06 - 09:11 AM
MMario 16 Jun 06 - 08:36 AM
GUEST,Father Time 16 Jun 06 - 08:12 AM
Bunnahabhain 16 Jun 06 - 07:43 AM
Bunnahabhain 16 Jun 06 - 07:40 AM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 11:01 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 09:54 PM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 08:29 PM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 07:07 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 06:47 PM
Acme 15 Jun 06 - 04:15 PM
Bunnahabhain 15 Jun 06 - 03:52 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 02:27 PM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 11:41 AM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 11:29 AM
Amos 15 Jun 06 - 11:03 AM
Rapparee 15 Jun 06 - 09:03 AM
Rapparee 14 Jun 06 - 09:21 PM
Amos 14 Jun 06 - 08:18 PM
Amos 14 Jun 06 - 07:24 PM
Rapparee 14 Jun 06 - 05:49 PM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 04:23 PM
Acme 14 Jun 06 - 04:20 PM
MMario 14 Jun 06 - 03:57 PM
Bunnahabhain 14 Jun 06 - 03:53 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jun 06 - 12:27 AM

Dang, Rapaire! I didna know you were an Action Figure!! Aha!! The truth is out!! Mwahhahahaha....Rapaire is an ACTION FIGURE.


Love those cartoons, too!! Thanks.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 11:55 PM

I have BOTH the old and the new figurines.

In fact, I bought some for the Idaho Library Association intellectual freedom auction last October. Rubber banded them, the old and the new, together with genuine rubber bands that had been used in an ACTUAL library. I got Nancy Pearl to autograph them. They brought $90 each set (!!!), and there were ten sets in the auction. Just my little bit to fight censorship and general ugliness. (I also gave away 2.5 sets as Christmas presents to my friends. My wife got the half set, 'cause she had the old model, but I had Nancy autograph both -- she was impressed, because the old model we had was one of the very first made.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 11:28 PM

Here!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 11:22 PM

Here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Nofus
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 10:55 PM

And then....Grjelnob entered, swining a mighty katonk and skeening like a welnotte in a Sunday gale! The Kerfustulans shrank back against the arborindium walls and fumbled desperately for their arterial probes. It was the Ides of Octember and all was not well!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 10:05 PM

The slogan on the T shirt was READ RESPONIBLY, Bunn -- not "Read Responsibly".


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 09:33 PM

I also have a jacket, dark blue, with the word "LIBRARY" in big yellow letters on the back. Actually, the library has several. We wear them when we jack-booted thugs kick down your door and drag your sorry ass and your overdue books off to the cells we have under the basement floor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 06:52 PM

It's creeping in through the cracks. Devouring your resources.    Resistance is futile.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 06:37 PM

How can one read irresponsibly? Bending the spines of books back, writing on them, and turning the pages too loudly? Or simply requiring help every five minute to find their arse with both hands the right book?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 03:35 PM

I've got WWDD tee shirt. Also a "Read Responibly" one. (I also have both a Mudcat tee and sweat shirt, among others.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 03:32 PM

stily - just keep some paint remover handy in case you develop a tendency to cackle in the mornings.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 03:31 PM

Meanwhile, the much-underestimated Shatner effect continues to take hold...silently turning all your expectations into mush...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 03:30 PM

Good plan, Stilly! If the stuff is good enough for a ocmmercial egg-production plant, as the site states, then it sure oughta be good enough for Texas Moms!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 03:23 PM

I saw one that had a big WWDD on it and over that was "What Would Dewey Do?"

Guess what I'm going to do?
paint (LO/MIT II)

I've been considering how to achieve the same effect that my neighbor got by spending $13,000 to put on a new roof and new decking with a reflective coating. His attic is much cooler now (so his cooling bill went way down). I'm putting on this paint to get about 75% of the heat reflected away. He reflects about 90%. I'm spending $1500 to do it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 03:17 PM

APPLAUSE!!! Oh, worldly demon of hyper-signification, my hat is off to you. LOL! Like the bird that flew in decreasing circles until it disappeared.

As for the linen that is made from nettle fiber, it must be handled with care; some nettles can be quite toxic, or at least painful, when grasped. There is a good product for use in dealing with them on the market called Nettlescape Explorer but it is not much in demand these days.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 03:05 PM

I was trying to install the necessary software on a PC at our branch today and the 8 year old son of one of the people there was drinking (powdered) lemonade. He said to me, "You don't even like sour stuff, I'll bet!"

Well, I told him that I used to but ever since my brother drank some stuff that was REALLY sour I didn't care for it any more. He asked why.

I told him that my brother drank some stuff that was SO sourt that he puckered inwardly. Puckered so much that he pucker-sucked himself right out of existence. Just a little POP! and he was gone.

The kid looked at me and said to him mother, "Mom! Is that TRUE???"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 02:50 PM

I've seen that tee shirt. But how about these? Or these?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 01:39 PM

sorry - used my last quibble up throwing it at Amos.

nettle fiber when of the better quality - has a very silklike sheen to it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 01:29 PM

I thought Nettle fibres would be a linen, as they are extracted in much the same way as Flax.

BTW, have you got a few spare quibbles? I'm in the mood to make an interesting curry tonight, and they go well in it....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 01:28 PM

I know what I want Rapaire to find for me. A Librarian t-shirt I saw a few years ago, on a lesbian librarian site. It had a warrior woman librarian who leers out from the front and demands "Find it Yourself!"

:)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 12:53 PM

quibble, quibble, quibble.

The Acadamy was founded as a memorial by their grand-cygnetschildren.

I've heard the School of Textiles there has one of the largest collections of nettle-silk fabrics in the world.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 12:46 PM

The Children of Lir did not, actually, found an Academy. By the time they were transformed back into their human form, they were aging rapidly, and didn't have time.

Besides, who wants to take life lessons from a failed swan?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 12:29 PM

Weapons-grade porridge -- definitely.

Hours in a day? No, it would be a deficit effect. A really good neutron-blast of significance, of the sort of which Rapaire is now capable, causes the humana brain to spin on its axis, requiring two to four hours to rebalance. That's why the U.N. tried to dissuade him from developing the capability. But he enrolled anyway. Now, he's degreed, a Master Operator on the Axis of Babble.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 12:21 PM

Yes, but what would that actually achieve? World Peace? Weapons grade porridge? Those really useful extra 3 hours in the day??


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 10:17 AM

Not to mention the members-only section of the Akashic Records, and the back stacks of Hell.

If EVER there was someone who could overwhelm with pure significance, unlimited cross-references, meaning without end, semantics wholesale, and umoored syntax run amok, our Rapaire is the man to do it.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 09:11 AM

A good librarian has access everywhere: to the College of Dis, to Tir na nOg State University's Mannan Library, to the closed stacks at the library of the Academy of the Children of Lir, the dread collections at Miskatonic University, all seven branches of the Cibola Public Library, even to the Vatican Library's archives, to name but a few.

"Librarians are the secret masters of the Universe. Don't ever piss one off."                              -- Spider Robinson


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 08:36 AM

hmmmmmmm, Rapaire is researching and qouting from play not written; substantive proof that :-space is real. Not that I really doubted the existance of L-space, but then again it is a little far fetched.

I just didn't realize he had access to the stacks at Unseen University!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Father Time
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 08:12 AM

" ....Too all good children over four
and under four and eighty
Be ye not over-prone to pore
On matters grave and weighty
Mayhap you'll find within this thread
Some touch of youth's rare clowning
If you will condescend to look
and not descend to frowning.
The mind of one old boy may hold
odd fancies and inviting
To guide a hand unsure and bold
that moves these days to writing
For hair once bright in days of yore
Grows grey (or somewhat slaty)
and now alas he's over four
though under four and eighty.
And so beyond this winding thread
I ponder, am I live or dead?
The thread is but a silver trail
that winds on, like a slimy snail.
And as the clock of time ticks on
I go, to sing another song.

F.T.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 07:43 AM

Actually, if there is a side to it we don't know about, then we don't want to know. Really, we don't.

Think then post, not post then think. Think then post , not post then think. Think then post, not.........


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Jun 06 - 07:40 AM

Rapiere seems worryingly keen on 'discipline'. Is there a side to the Idaho Legion that we don't know about?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:01 PM

Oh, TOP drawer, sir! Huzzah!


ROFLMA


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 09:54 PM

For your edification, some poetry from Hector Bluwbalz, Plagarist Laureate of Corn Creek, Idaho. These are taken from his Uncollected Works (Boise: BDM Press, 2006)

There ain't nothin'
Like my breath
To send you miles away,
Or any poetry like mine
To make you waste a day.


                -- Hector Bluwbalz, My Poetry, 1994


Because I could not stop for Mom
She kindly stopped for me,
The threads held just two of us,
And Amos and Stilly and Bunn and Bee-Dubya-Ell and Tweed and Khandu and Peace and Little Hawk and Rapaire and just all sorts of other whackos.

                -- Hector Bluwbalz, Because, 2005

I heard a fly buzz as I died,
So I hit it a good smack
And I revived
'Cause no damn fly is gonna upstage my deathbed.


                -- Hector Bluwbalz, I heard a fly, 1988


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 08:29 PM

Tell ya what, Stilly, let's be nice to Brother Rapaire. I mean -- after all-- he DID leave in a lot of good bits. :>D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 07:07 PM

Actually, I submit that we are already quite disciplined -- enough, at least, to honor the sources of our rlelentless borrowings.

But, noooooo.

That would spoil all the fun, eh??

:D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 06:47 PM

Mom! Stilly's being mean to me too, I think! Just because I have access to the von und zu Weltenshaungbilderzeitgeist Collection Of Ancient Rare Manuscripts And Plays And Poems and they don't! Discipline them! Discipline them!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 04:15 PM

That'll do it, Bunn. And I agree with Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 03:52 PM

How about 200 posts worth of Community service, for all those times when Mom is close to the bottom, and the rest of us are ill disposed?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 02:27 PM

Mom! Amos is abusing me again (I think). All I've done is track down quotes from plays that never quite made, Mom, and Amos says I'm stealing them! Punish him! Make him go to church or something!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:41 AM

Your borrowings, my sticky-fingered friend, grow defter with practice. The day will come when you will be able to re-post the whole MOAB, signing each entry as your own, and automate the process to boot, so you will never want for posting.

God knows, once you have deployed and debugged such a program, what you woudl do with yyourself, though. ;>)

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:29 AM

Our postings now are ended. These our actors,        
As I foretold you, were all spirits, and              
Are melted into air, into thin air;        
And, like the baseless fabric of the Mudcat,        
The cloud-capp'd towers, the gorgeous postings,        
The solemn songsters, the great Cafe itself,              
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve        
And, like an insubstantial pageant faded,        
Leave not a thread behind. We are such stuff        
As dreams are made on, and our little life              
Is rounded with a sleep (except, of course, for MOAB,
For such sublime artistry goes on forever).


                      -- Ann H. Shakespeare, The Teapot, 1601.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 11:03 AM

Ver' impressive sirrah.

My considered opinion is, that if there is indeed safety in numbers, as the old wives are wont to say, then it cannot be gainsaid that our MOAB is the safest thread on the whole Mudcat.

It is a bastion of security in an endless plain of rolling significance, with scattered threads of blue genius flowing among it, and clumps of vitriol visible here and there. MOAB is the inner tower, and the donjon keep, and the calm center that holds when all else splashes and gyres in the woolying wabe.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 06 - 09:03 AM

Full flagon five thy father lies;
Of his beers are urine made;
Those are closed that were his eyes:
Nothing of him that remains conscious
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something disgusting and drunken.
Bar-maids hourly ring his tot:
   "Ya stupid, drunken sot!"

          -- Billy B. Shakespeare, The Tosspot.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 09:21 PM

Now o'er one half the world nature seems dead
And wicked drinks abuse the troubled sleep.
Brewcraft celebrates jovial Bacchus' offering
And the wetted sot, alarmed by his flagon showing bottom,
Howls at his watch, and with the drunkard's staggering steps
Toward the barrel moves like a goat.
Oh, thou sure and firm-set Earth, hear not my steps
Which way they wend for fear the very stones come up and meet me!

(A bung is started.)

I go, and it is done. The cup invites me.
Drink it down, Duncan, for it is a knell
That calls you to imbibe in something swell!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 08:18 PM

Whoops!

..I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible
To feeling as to sight? or art thou but
A dagger of the mind, a false creation,
Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?
I see thee yet, in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.
Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going;
And such an instrument I was to use.
Mine eyes are made the fools o' the other senses,
Or else worth all the rest


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 07:24 PM

I think that was Jules Mac Seezer.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 05:49 PM

The "sottish" play? I don't remember that much drinking in Macbeth.

Oh, wait

Is this a flagon I see before me, its handle towards my hand?
Come! Let me clutch thee!...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 04:23 PM

Are you saying 'twas naught but a Midsummers Night Dream?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 04:20 PM

If you try to take that argument any further you'll find it was much ado about nothing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 03:57 PM

The Sottish Play? IN AUGUST?

August is for 'As you Like it'.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 14 Jun 06 - 03:53 PM

Good question, but I have to save my yearly ration of that phrase for the festival here. It get used alot, and by the performers as much as the Audience. Not surprising when you run into an all lesbian perfomance of Macbeth, being staged in japanese on the top of a double decker bus, and it seems normal, as it's August...


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