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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 26 Mar 09 - 12:18 AM
Janie 26 Mar 09 - 12:03 AM
Amos 25 Mar 09 - 11:51 PM
Rapparee 25 Mar 09 - 05:00 PM
Little Hawk 25 Mar 09 - 04:46 PM
Acme 25 Mar 09 - 04:42 PM
Amos 25 Mar 09 - 02:07 PM
Rapparee 25 Mar 09 - 12:34 PM
Amos 25 Mar 09 - 11:24 AM
Rapparee 25 Mar 09 - 08:45 AM
Amos 25 Mar 09 - 01:10 AM
Acme 24 Mar 09 - 11:06 PM
Amos 24 Mar 09 - 08:32 PM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 08:29 PM
Donuel 24 Mar 09 - 07:29 PM
MMario 24 Mar 09 - 06:16 PM
Amos 24 Mar 09 - 05:55 PM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 05:22 PM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 04:34 PM
Little Hawk 24 Mar 09 - 03:26 PM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 02:20 PM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 12:30 PM
Acme 24 Mar 09 - 12:28 PM
Amos 24 Mar 09 - 10:14 AM
Rapparee 24 Mar 09 - 08:22 AM
Janie 24 Mar 09 - 12:29 AM
Acme 24 Mar 09 - 12:15 AM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 11:33 PM
Donuel 23 Mar 09 - 11:30 PM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 11:25 PM
Janie 23 Mar 09 - 10:43 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 10:40 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Mar 09 - 09:29 PM
Acme 23 Mar 09 - 07:41 PM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 06:13 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 05:05 PM
Little Hawk 23 Mar 09 - 04:55 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 03:04 PM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 12:41 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 09 - 08:28 AM
Amos 23 Mar 09 - 01:31 AM
Acme 22 Mar 09 - 11:47 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 09 - 08:36 PM
Janie 22 Mar 09 - 05:41 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 09 - 05:07 PM
Amos 22 Mar 09 - 04:58 PM
Janie 22 Mar 09 - 03:38 PM
Amos 22 Mar 09 - 02:44 PM
Amos 22 Mar 09 - 03:35 AM
Acme 22 Mar 09 - 02:30 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Mar 09 - 12:18 AM

Janie:

Your most energetic defense is a countersuit. Second is to gather evidence of his disreard for truth. What on earth could he be sueing FOR, anyway?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 Mar 09 - 12:03 AM

Time to organize a group of vigilantes. I'm thinking Rap, with sabers rattling and guns blazing, Chongo, the McBride boys - best leave the Legionaires at the Hall, I expect. Thugs, knights gallante, some one handy with a sharp knitting needle - hell - I'd even welcome our old friend Martin Gibson - well, no. That is definitely going to far. Strike that last line.

Just got notice of another lawsuit the ex has initiated. That is three in the pipeline now. I figure the mortgage I'd have to take out to fly the crew out here, keep 'em fed, and go their bail if they get caught will be considerably less that the mortgage I'm going to have to take out to cover the attorney fees to defend myself. He is determined to stay on my radar screen, no matter what he has to do accomplish that, and is willing to bankrupt himself and me if that is what it takes to be sure he still has my attention.

I just want to move on with my life and stop being distracted by all this to the detriment of Sum Yung Sun. I wish I could just cave in and walk away. Problem is, that is what I have been doing, hoping he would then leave me alone. He has experienced that as an invitation to push some more. (Silly me, I lived with the man for 25 years, and already knew that about him. He is not a monster, but is a man governed completely by his emotions - and boy, is he enraged at me for "abandoning" him.)

Talk about Bullsh*t!

I WANT MY MOMMY!!!!

Rant over. Pretend I didn't post this.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 11:51 PM

IFfen you knew somebody like that you wouldn't be writting 'bout it nor thimking on it neither.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 05:00 PM

sir·rah (sr) n. Obsolete: Mister; fellow. Used as a contemptuous form of address.

Well, it's like this: out here, iffen we're contemptuous of some low life, egg suckin', dog shootin', boot lickin', child of unmitigated pond scum we don't bother callin' 'em names. Nossir! We jist shoot 'em an' put the world outa its misery.

Good thing I don't know nobody like that, ain't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 04:46 PM

There Amos goes saying that word "sirrah" again. He does that whenever he starts feeling all high and mighty. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 04:42 PM

They print the paper money here in Fort Worth, and the paper is closely guarded, from my understanding. But maybe you could make your own, Rap. It's about 80% cotton and 20% linen. You know that old pair of jeans in the back of your closet on the floor? Start with those. Someone told me the cotton in money comes from denim.

I guess you'll have to put it in the Waring blender. You can't run those jeans through the copier once you scanned your bills.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 02:07 PM

It's not that we don't know such things, sirrah. We simply do not discuss them in mixed-up company. I understand things are a bit more inclined toward barbarism where you are. But I think it would be more enjoyable and less risky if you could contrive to get paid merely for scanning yourself, rather than using a fancy electronic device.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 12:34 PM

1. Get a bunch of twenties.
2. Run both sides through the scanner.
3. Print them off on a color laser scanner.

Invest a hundred, reap ten-fold or more.

Sheesh, I though Socalers all knew how to do that....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 11:24 AM

Given the time you've spent scanning other people's configurations, you should be well-qualified for the position. I didn't actually know you could get paid for that kind of thing though!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 08:45 AM

Well, I need a pretty decent one if I'm going to make money.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Mar 09 - 01:10 AM

Well, it's Rapaire's fault for telling her she ought to get a CAT scan, anyway!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 11:06 PM

Rap, the one I replaced was an HP. It took a lot of coaxing to get the darned thing to work and I never found software updates that helped (on the other hand, I LOVE my HP laser printer). This Canon is a delight. Scanners always come with different operating software from what you're used to, and it took a little poking around to get it set on the professional/custom settings so it would easily let me save where I wanted and not just add to some hokey album. I think they'll all, by default, set for the home user who doesn't know a lot about scanning and doesn't want to learn.

MOM tried to scan a cat on Rap's scanner, but she never told him about it. The cat got so freaked out by the noise and the light that the entire thing pitched off of the table when the kitty escaped. It looked okay so MOM just put it back in place.

Sorry I never told you about that. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 08:32 PM

No, no!! There' legit--they're just comparing them to 1975 prices...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 08:29 PM

Haddock, flounder, and halibut are all extremely reticent, Amos. They have to be. I, myself, need not be reticent but I am because I'm just a shy kinda kid from the Great Midwest who grew up where the tall corn dusts the sky with its golden pollen and where you can, on a clear day, see clear to the horizon.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 07:29 PM

`Hi def scanners $30,000-$60,000 now only $199.99
http://www.Foat.com

(fell off a truck . con)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 06:16 PM

Is there an even hundred due? Already? Seems like it was just 99 posts or so ago....

oh.

right.

I'll get me hat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 05:55 PM

Reticence? RETICENCE? AS well speak of the warmblooded passions of the haddock.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 05:22 PM

I hope everyone notices my reticence in snagging the next hundred.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 04:34 PM

I didn't want and didn't like the HP scanner, but didn't have any choice at the time. As for that picture LH received, I suspect that it belonged to The Purple Dandelion, Camp Follower 1st Class, of the Idaho Legion. S/he had bandages all over his/her gluteus the other day.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 03:26 PM

Your scanner would have lasted a lot longer, Rapaire, if you had not sat down on it and scanned your bare ass the other day. A machine can only take so much! I don't think the people you emailed the pictures to were all that well impressed either...I know I wasn't.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 02:20 PM

And it's no longer made, being replaced by the 5600F.

So I found one anyway and it'll be here on Thursday. US $123.and change from PC Connection.

Pat just told me 3 to 10 inches of snow tomorrow....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:30 PM

Funny.

That's the one I'm going to buy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:28 PM

When you see how well a new scanner works you'll say "Good riddance" to the six year old one. I had to replace one a few months ago and the difference in speed, willingness to actually WORK and volume of operation are wonderful. And it cost less than the last one. Of course.

Canon Canoscan 4400F

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 10:14 AM

IT's that damned Ethical Enviro-sensor circuit Carly made them build into it, dude. It senses ambient levels of irresponsibility and shuts the system down above a certain level. It's a safety measure, you know....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 08:22 AM

I've discovered that my scanner has croaked. And at a time when I needed it rather badly. I know that entropy increases but why must it increase when I need it not to?

Why is the Universe against me? I created it, fergawdsakes! I must have done so in a fit of depression or self-hate.

Now I have to go out and stimulate the economy by buying a new scanner and the other one not yet six years old.

I'll betcha this wouldn't have happened if Stilly hadn't stolen my number. Since it's her fault I'll send her the bill for my new scanner. And this time I'll get a decent one, not an HP.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:29 AM

Edit?

You edit?

Not me, babe. I'm primary process all the way.

especially when it comes time to let the BS roll!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Mar 09 - 12:15 AM

That's funny--I didn't even notice the number, just that when I edited the sentence I removed too many words. :-/


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 11:33 PM

Exclusive of what? Do they exclude the funnels and the rudder?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 11:30 PM

I have exclusive pictures of the AIG yacht!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 11:25 PM

Stealin' my number!
What a beautiful way of showing how much you love me!!
Stealin' my number!!
What a wonderful way of showing what you're thinking of me

I can see it, your face is glowing,
I can see it, in your eyes I'm happy you know it

That you been,
Stealin' my number!!
Ya took the number I wanted, and I love what it's doing to you,
Stealin' my number!!
You're incorrigible, I can see wicked things all through you,

The need inside you, I see it showing,
Oh the hunger for it growin'
Baby do you feel it growing,
Are you happy you know it,

That you were stealing my Number
All the while that hunger was growing,,
YA went ahead an' took it
All the time you were plainly knowin'

Didn't have to take it-- you could have left it for me.
You could have held back just one time,
But you had to ignore me!! Yes, ignore me!

Now you're stelaing my number!
What a beautiful way of showing how much you love me!!
Stealin' my number!!
What a wonderful way of showing what you're thinking of me!
I just don't under stand it!
In a world that's bright and free
Why can't you do like I do
And think of no-one else but me!

No, you had to be
The one making free
And stealing my number
SOme day you'll learn not to mess with a man like me girl!
Stealing my number!
SOme day I'll figure out how else I can be girl,

So you won't be, girl,
Won't be stelaing my number
Steraling my number
Stealing my number......

(Fade to mauve)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 10:43 PM

Oh Rapaire, go fork yourself.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 10:40 PM

I noticed that, but being a gentleman I didn't make any fuss about Stilly

STEALING MY NUMBER!!

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! Stilly was mean to me!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 09:29 PM

All hail Stilly River Sage, capturer of the most notable palindromic number "28282"!

If you rotate it 180° it becomes "78787"... sort of... if you use your imagination.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 07:41 PM

If shake them out I bet you could make them last longer. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 06:13 PM

Mom!! I found the HEPA vacuum bags at Sears. I got a year's supply....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 05:05 PM

Nah, we don't have any Irish (blood) in us. Viking and Germanic, yeah, but Irish -- nope. You don't think we'd want to be associated with people like the McBrides, do you? Heck, they can barely stand being associated with themselves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 04:55 PM

Sounds a lot like some of Shane's old family history to me. They emigrated from Ireland back in the 1800's sometime, and it's just been one long tale of disaster from then till now...unless you count Shane's incredible success with women and Don's even slightly (well, considerably) more incredible success with women...and fixing old trucks and cars. Don has parlayed the latter into actually earning a living! This is rare for a McBride. They normally have supported themselves mostly by theft, begging, and going on the dole. Shane follows nobly in the family tradition. Don is a bit of a maverick.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 03:04 PM

Might be, but she sure sent that gal off with a load of rock salt in her sittin' down place. And grandpa wasn't real happy for quite a while neither, sleepin' out in the garage and all like he did. They finally kissed and made up, jist in time for grandpa to have a stroke and die. Leastwise, the doc said it was a stroke, even though grandma went around for a couple weeks with a knowing smile and I noticed that the can of sodium fluoride they kept around to kill roaches with was pretty empty even though it was brand new 'cause I was with grandma when she bought it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 12:41 PM

Your grampa was always forking up whatever he tried. And as I recall she was not a dab hand, more like a flounder, or perhaps a manatee hand...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 08:28 AM

My grandpa used to fork around in the garden until grandma caught him at it. Never knew the old lady was such a dab hand with a shotgun....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 09 - 01:31 AM

WEll, nice to have the comforting certainty that the garden is all forked up, anyway.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 11:47 PM

Hell, Janie, I'm on my THIRD spade fork at this house alone (in 7 years)! I broke a tine off of one, the other turned out to be kind of feeble and I think I cracked the handle, so I bought one last fall that I hope is a real sturdy one. It was the most expensive and heaviest on the rack.

This was one of those days in the garden when every time I wanted to start one task I realized I had to back up and do something else first. As a result, I have cleared up an old compost pile by adding it, sans sticks, to my new compost pile (the sticks in the old one meant it didn't break down like it should have), I cut up and stacked at the curb several large tree limbs that I took down last summer, I dug a new bed (the sod from that generated the compost pile work) and made a run to Home Depot for manure and ran past the park site for free compost (lots of wood chunks in it, I use it more like a mulch around the edge of the garden and to mark the path where I can step in the garden). I planted some tomatoes, and as a bonus, fixed a bicycle for some kids who were kind of far from home, it was dusk, and they thought they just needed a hammer to pound the handlebar into place. It needed a hammer and an Allen wrench, and after that little break, I finished planting and mulching tomatoes. Peppers tomorrow.

MOM, I'm bushed. I knew I had to keep moving until I finished everything (including fixing dinner) because once I sat down (now) I probably wouldn't want to get up again. And I don't.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 08:36 PM

Well, you shouldn't have been forking in the garden in the first place.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 05:41 PM

Wahhhh! I snapped the handle on my garden fork!

10 years, and this is the first time it gave any indication at all that it resented being used like a crowbar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 05:07 PM

It was 72 yesterday, the sky was bright blue...it's "precipitating" right now and it's 34. But the new tulips and jonquils and daffodils and irises and hyacinths are up and starting to show the tiniest bit of color.

Spitzen Zeigen Vörwarts!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 04:58 PM

Yes ma'a'm. Suck up warmth and sunshine wherever found, and you will have ti in you in reserve for grayer days.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 03:38 PM

Hey Mom, the oven is all clean now, and so are the kitchen and living room windows. If you don't mind, I'll save the rest of the windows for another day and head outside to pot up some plants while there is still plenty of warmth and sunshine left.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 02:44 PM

Ya know, I always did feel like a drifter, about this time of day.
And when the moonlight touches the water,
Surely something touches me,
And I go reaching for the river,
Like it,s reaching for the sea.




I hate to see,
Our mom go driftin' down.
Because it makes me feel,
Were on our last time round,
Oh, yeah....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 03:35 AM

And to you both, salutes for courage, earnestness and stoutness of heart.

We scrubbed all the dishes and dried them. The Ocenaographer, the Retied Physicist and the Choreographer werre joined by new friends, the Education Executive and his wife. A lovely time and a successful experiment in sweet and sour chicken and brown rice. Good talk, good wine, and a good evening.

The kitchen is back to battery and our heads are full.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Mar 09 - 02:30 AM

Janie, take it easy on yourself. Keep that recognition of the date modest (and PM if you want to talk. Been there, done that. 10 years ago this year.)


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