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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 05 Aug 06 - 08:30 PM
Amos 05 Aug 06 - 05:01 PM
Acme 05 Aug 06 - 04:12 PM
Amos 05 Aug 06 - 01:58 PM
Amos 05 Aug 06 - 12:46 PM
Acme 05 Aug 06 - 12:13 PM
GUEST,Stilly River Sage on Moonglow's new Dell 05 Aug 06 - 12:39 AM
Acme 04 Aug 06 - 07:29 PM
Rapparee 04 Aug 06 - 06:58 PM
Acme 04 Aug 06 - 06:20 PM
Rapparee 04 Aug 06 - 05:41 PM
Amos 04 Aug 06 - 04:15 PM
Acme 04 Aug 06 - 03:50 PM
Rapparee 04 Aug 06 - 03:36 PM
Amos 04 Aug 06 - 02:57 PM
Amos 04 Aug 06 - 02:56 PM
Amos 04 Aug 06 - 02:56 PM
Rapparee 04 Aug 06 - 02:15 PM
beardedbruce 04 Aug 06 - 12:58 PM
Amos 04 Aug 06 - 12:09 PM
MMario 04 Aug 06 - 11:59 AM
Amos 04 Aug 06 - 11:50 AM
Acme 04 Aug 06 - 11:36 AM
beardedbruce 04 Aug 06 - 11:18 AM
Acme 04 Aug 06 - 09:55 AM
Rapparee 04 Aug 06 - 09:10 AM
beardedbruce 04 Aug 06 - 08:35 AM
Amos 04 Aug 06 - 02:51 AM
Acme 04 Aug 06 - 12:08 AM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 09:12 PM
Peace 03 Aug 06 - 08:42 PM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 08:31 PM
Peace 03 Aug 06 - 06:45 PM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 06:41 PM
Rapparee 03 Aug 06 - 05:51 PM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 04:27 PM
Rapparee 03 Aug 06 - 03:56 PM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 02:14 PM
Rapparee 03 Aug 06 - 01:35 PM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 01:14 PM
Rapparee 03 Aug 06 - 12:09 PM
MMario 03 Aug 06 - 11:19 AM
Acme 03 Aug 06 - 11:14 AM
MMario 03 Aug 06 - 11:08 AM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 11:05 AM
Amos 03 Aug 06 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 03 Aug 06 - 08:55 AM
MMario 03 Aug 06 - 08:19 AM
Rapparee 02 Aug 06 - 10:15 PM
Acme 02 Aug 06 - 09:59 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Aug 06 - 08:30 PM

Got my tire fixed. Hot as hell out there today, but I figured I'd get it out of the way. The shop I bought it in closed, so I went to another in the chain.

"How much will that cost?"

"It's free. You bought it from us so we fix and balance it free."

Sometimes all it takes is one little thing to make your day. :) They put the spare back up under the back and put everything away. How nice!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Aug 06 - 05:01 PM

I'm sorry -- I fogot to put my liddle winky face in. I love Rapaire like a brother. He knows that. And you and BWL and Suz Rustic and all the other madcap regulars in these parts.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Aug 06 - 04:12 PM

Still a little cranky from the heat, Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Aug 06 - 01:58 PM

Rapaire:

Your smarmy agreeableness really sucks, ya know that?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Aug 06 - 12:46 PM

Our heat wave has broken here - the normal maritime airs are cooling us. Maybe ours went down your way...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Aug 06 - 12:13 PM

So, the big bang yesterday was a nail that went into the tire when I drove over something that stayed on the road so the nail didn't stay in the tire. The leak would have been slower that way. Good thing I got home (and didn't stop anywhere on the way or I'd have made that call to AAA from the grocery store parking lot). It was 10am when they guy got here (pretty quickly after I called) and I think it's already 95 out there. It's supposed to get up to 105 today. Bleahhh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Stilly River Sage on Moonglow's new Dell
Date: 05 Aug 06 - 12:39 AM

Well, the week has been consistent, I must stay. I started with a fridge on the fritz and I end with a flat tire. Just went out to move the aforesaid Chevy PU into the garage and it didn't drive right. I heard a big bang when I was on the highway earlier this evening but there was no change in driving it (though I was headed off to a side street, and I drove on boulevards the rest of the way home). This is what I pay AAA for. I'll call early so the burly fellow who arrives to change my tire won't get too hot out there in the driveway.

Beware! This is what you get when you run over pointy headed pseudo-intellectuals and their sidewalk chalk on the highway!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 07:29 PM

Come to think of it, there was a humor piece floating around (first sent to me by sometimes Mudcat visitor Jean Smith) about the "Urka Gurka Clock." Wakes you right up when you hear that sound. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 06:58 PM

Oh, you certainly can't!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 06:20 PM

I don't remember that one, but he goes "Ack!" a lot. I visited that thread where someone will eventually get to be the last to post, and put something there just to say something. You just never know what people are going to read into the sound of a cat urping up a furball.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 05:41 PM

How very nice of you, Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 04:15 PM

And I, sir, can think of no-one to whom your jealousy would be as well-suited...

Stilly: Is Bill the Cat the one who goes "Mrooowwwwwwwwr....".?


LOL


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 03:50 PM

Such interpretive skills the boy has, to take a random uttering on a different thread and assume it was aimed at him or was an invitation? Quote Bill the Cat and he imagines a treatise by Twain, perhaps? (i.e., "eschew surplussage.")

Careful crossing the highway lanes out there--be particularly watchful for extended cab Chevy pickups.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 03:36 PM

How very nice for you, Amos. I can think of no one for whom such a thing would have been nicer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 02:57 PM

To thirteen thousand
And
Five hundred!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 02:56 PM

And 'ere the sun had set he saw
HE'd made it...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 02:56 PM

It's coming close the old man cried!
I smell it, loud he thundered...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 02:15 PM

All are welcome here. Even Martin Gibson once posted here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: beardedbruce
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 12:58 PM

It looks to me like I was invited here...

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Subject: RE: BS: In every thread someone has to be last!
From: Stilly River Sage - PM
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 11:07 AM

ack!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


By the way, Silly, if you don't like my verse just don't bother to read it.

Your distinctions are of no consequence when it come to the quality of discourse about reality.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 12:09 PM

Because BB is from another family, and has escaped his chores at home. If you go out later and find him, perhaps he can teach you a few wiles. No guarantees, though -- remember, "You can't BS an old BSer". And ours is the Mother of them all.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 11:59 AM

How cume Bruce gets to go outside and play and MOM said I had to finish my chores first? Huh? Howcum?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 11:50 AM

When Mom says 'Go outside and play!'
There isn't much a lad can say;
If wise, he just gets on his way,
Knowing there are worlds of folded danger
Within her gentle command.

And let him thankful be,
That she not spankful be
And let the screen door close behind
Unscarred by wrath in Mother's mind
And Mother's wrathful hand.

The world without is full of Other
To satify a curious brother,
And leave behind the mines and bombs
That lurk within all pissed-off Moms
Should one against them stand.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 11:36 AM

Before we start slinging around black pots and kettles, BB, let's both acknowledge that your bow is strung just a little too tight to tolerate much of the wide-ranging repartee on this thread. Your distinctions are of no consequence when it come to the quality of discourse in the MOAB.

Mom says you need to go outside and play, and she said to give you some sidewalk chalk so you can go write a sonnet on a freeway retaining wall. I suggest a linear format on the left side of the road or drivers won't have time to read it (unless traffic has ground to a halt, in which case you can make it as tall as you want.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: beardedbruce
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 11:18 AM

"Crap is a term meaning either poor quality or feces. The former meaning is sometimes considered mildly vulgar; the latter meaning is oftentimes considered mildly or moderately vulgar, but could be, on occasion, viewed as strongly vulgar by means of scatological and sensory-provoking use of the word.

In its former meaning it also connotes inaccurate, of little factual substance, lies, hype, or quackery. It can be partnered with "bull" to enhance the power of the word.

The word is considered by many people to be less offensive than "shit", which holds similar meanings and can be used nearly interchangeably. Some people find the word crap offensive, even if not intended to mean feces, and will use the minced oath "crud" instead. Alternatively, for some people, crap more closely retains its association with feces than "shit" and is therefore more offensive than the latter."






I have already noted your constant postings of "crap"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 09:55 AM

"Crap" and BS are NOT the same thing, BB. Look out or well start posting examples to illustrate this important point.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 09:10 AM

Except MOAB, which started out at BS. You can't be .9 and 1.0 at the same time, although .9 is contained within 1.0. Thus MOAB is perfect and contains within it The All, The Cosmic Unity. I leave it to you whether or not MOAB is the Ultimate Religion, but I will point out that there is no collection taken and everyone is infallible and every day is MOABday....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: beardedbruce
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 08:35 AM

"Sturgeon's Revelation, which states, "90% of everything is crap"."

Applied recursively, 90% of the remaning 10% is crap.
90% of the remaning 1% is crap.
90% of the remaning .1% is crap.
90% of the remaning .01% is crap.
90% of the remaning .001% is crap.
...


It is ALL crap. Thus, MOAB.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 02:51 AM

Nawww -- raisins, at best.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Aug 06 - 12:08 AM

Jujubes, not prunes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 09:12 PM

How can you fit nine wrinkled old prunes into one post?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Peace
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 08:42 PM

Nine what? Keriste, what a question. Nine of these. (And think of THEM when you age.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 08:31 PM

Nine what?


A
First Vowel


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Peace
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 06:45 PM

This post is evenly divisible by 9, FYI.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 06:41 PM

Well, that's inflation for ya!! Hell, I started out pumping gas at less than 30 cents a gallon, with free windshield washing thrown in.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 05:51 PM

Yes. Only it's been recently updated to 98%.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 04:27 PM

It has only one provision: 'Nothing is always absolutely so.'

On this, you may rely.

You may be thinking of, or emulating, Sturgeon's Revelation, which states, "90% of everything is crap".

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 03:56 PM

You ARE familiar with the provisions of Sturgeon's Law, are you not?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 02:14 PM

Just because it's true, Rapaire, doesn't mean it's not B.S. Especially in your area!!! :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 01:35 PM

Branding. Yup, all the companies today talk about "branding": Toyota, Coca-Cola, all of them. The idea is to became so identified with a brand that you immediately identify when you hear the word.

Now, out here in the Wild West "branding" has a bit of a different meaning. There's the Crazy-Leg T, the Ten In Texas (XIT), and lots of others.

So an email came through on "branding" libraries: making them identifiable with an idea.

But I'm in the Wild and Wooly West, not in New Yawk or Boise or something. So I have today sent off an application to the Idaho State Brand Inspector to register the brand MPL connected with a rocker so that this library can, if we choose, run cattle, sheep, and horses.

And by the way -- this isn't BS. I really have.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 01:14 PM

Speaking purely as a lesser prophet, I can confirm Rapaire's suspicion that Moses was buried somewhere in this thread. It wasn't his fault, really; he tried. He was just too serious, and couldn't keep up. So he got covered up with high-speed BS somewhere in the vicinity of 9,322.


Amos

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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 12:09 PM

Now. Everyone open their Bibles and turn to Deuteronomy, Chapter 34, verses 5-7. There you will find it written that Moses, THE Moses, died in and was buried in...MOAB!!! And not the one in Utah, either!

Yes, Moses, the Leader of the Twelve Tribes of Israel, the dude who brought down the Ten Commandments, the Head Honcho of the Exodus, the cat who brought the plagues on Egypt, that Moses, is somewhere in MOAB.

Which tells you something about either Moses or MOAB (or both).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 11:19 AM

oh - MOAB can distinguish between pure BS and pure BS - if you know what I mean. Granted the exudant of DC is purely BS - but it isn't pure BS if you get my drift.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 11:14 AM

How will it be distinguished from the immense volume of BS pumped out of Washington, D.C.? Our little speck of nonsense and commonsense--will it rise above the offal they generate?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 11:08 AM

Be not afraid - when the Rupture occurs - all those posts will be resurrected in the flesh and will ascend bodily into the aether there to reside with MOAB forever in eternal joy and pieces.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 11:05 AM

This post is dedicated to thirteen thousand, four hundred and seventy, and all the lesser numbers who gave their lives to reach it.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 11:04 AM

If I had a BS thread,
Tell you what I'd do,
I'd turn my back on common sense
And write B.S. with you.

If I was a great big bull,
Tell you what I'd do,
I'd save up all my big BS
And send it all to you.

Oh, I'm working on a BS thread
Working on a BS thread, it's true
You can put aside your cares and woes
And work on the BS thread too!


If I had a library,
I'll tell you what I'd do,
I'd dedicate my research time
To write BS for you

And if I worked in a college grand
I'll tell you what I'd do,
I'd comandeer all those weighty brains
To write BS for you!

Oh, I'm working on a BS thread
Working on a BS thread, it's true
You can put aside your cares and woes
And work on the BS thread too!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 08:55 AM

A similar dish was made from before history started until 1867 CE, when it changed. The earlier recipe was made in a sheep's bladder and contained chopped ilk innards, thistle roots, and the seeds of various wild grasses and seaweeds. The stuffed bladder was then boiled for several days in "wylde seewattr" before being thrown at the English or, on the three days when there were no English in Scotland, in the general direction of England.

This was called "hagus." Note difference in spelling and pronunciation -- it has very often been confused with the more recent culinary disaster, "haggis."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 03 Aug 06 - 08:19 AM

Sorry Rapaire - I have documented recipes for Haggis from the very early 1600's.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Aug 06 - 10:15 PM

That is, of course, 1867 CE.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Aug 06 - 09:59 PM

Okay, now come clean the iced tea off of my monitor. . .


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