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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 22 Mar 10 - 09:53 AM
Rapparee 22 Mar 10 - 12:14 PM
Little Hawk 22 Mar 10 - 12:28 PM
Acme 22 Mar 10 - 01:33 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 01:45 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 10 - 01:53 PM
Little Hawk 22 Mar 10 - 02:05 PM
Acme 22 Mar 10 - 02:34 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 02:53 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 02:57 PM
gnu 22 Mar 10 - 03:04 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 03:35 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 10 - 05:56 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 07:02 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 10 - 07:49 PM
Eiseley 22 Mar 10 - 08:19 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 08:58 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 10:08 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 10 - 10:12 PM
Eiseley 22 Mar 10 - 10:27 PM
Acme 22 Mar 10 - 11:06 PM
Rapparee 22 Mar 10 - 11:12 PM
Amos 22 Mar 10 - 11:22 PM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 10:14 AM
Rapparee 23 Mar 10 - 10:51 AM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 11:45 AM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 03:07 PM
Eiseley 23 Mar 10 - 03:10 PM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 04:16 PM
Acme 23 Mar 10 - 04:48 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 23 Mar 10 - 05:00 PM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 06:49 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 10 - 06:58 PM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 07:40 PM
Rapparee 23 Mar 10 - 08:30 PM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 08:42 PM
Eiseley 23 Mar 10 - 10:02 PM
Amos 23 Mar 10 - 10:05 PM
Acme 24 Mar 10 - 12:19 AM
Rapparee 24 Mar 10 - 10:26 AM
Rapparee 24 Mar 10 - 10:27 AM
MMario 24 Mar 10 - 10:36 AM
Amos 24 Mar 10 - 10:39 AM
Rapparee 24 Mar 10 - 01:29 PM
Amos 24 Mar 10 - 02:15 PM
Amos 24 Mar 10 - 02:24 PM
Amos 24 Mar 10 - 02:25 PM
Rapparee 24 Mar 10 - 02:36 PM
Amos 24 Mar 10 - 02:47 PM
Little Hawk 24 Mar 10 - 04:42 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 09:53 AM

Bravo, all of yez. Quelle Drame Enorme!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 12:14 PM

What's this, Amos? English ain't enough fer ya, huh? Well, all I gotta say is braccae tuae aperiuntur et in dentibus acticis frustrum magnum spinaciae habes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 12:28 PM

Amos? It's Shatner's birthday today! What are you going to do to mark the festive occasion?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 01:33 PM

They're going to reenact the worst Star Trek fight ever. Bar none. The Friends of the Fuller's Earth Society were not amused at the use of their product in this episode (they winced for much of the production of the entire series, actually).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 01:45 PM

As with all occasions where we must remember the almost great, the heroes manqués, the losers who could have been contenders, I intend to observe a full sixty milliseconds of silence in their honor.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 01:53 PM

LH didn't even know it was Bill's B-day until I started a thread about it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 02:05 PM

I was being uber-kind by giving Rapaire the thrill of his life and letting him be the one to announce it!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 02:34 PM

If you want to pause for a moment of silence, do it after viewing that YouTube clip. Use that moment to wonder how they every thought anyone would believe that choreographed event was a "fight."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 02:53 PM

Well, see, there's a difference in gravitational force, atmospheric density, and ultraviolet intensity. Plus, who are we to judge Lizard Men whose strength so far exceeds out own?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 02:57 PM

Actually, Still, having taken your Sage advice and reviewed the early Shatner fight scene, I wish to amend my observance from milliseconds to picoseconds.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 03:04 PM

Nano Nano from Urk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 03:35 PM

There's no question, Hawkster, that you are SOME kind of uber, certainly. Possibly a "G" type.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 05:56 PM

He is not an Ubermensch. Perhaps a Mittlemensch or even a Middlemarch, but you'd have to check with George on that or she'll be Cross.





(Hyuck, hyuck, I jist worked in one of them there litterairy puns, hyuck.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 07:02 PM

I think that was a military pun, or isn't that what the George Cross is used for?

I think a G-uber is meet.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 07:49 PM

Is he one of them G-uber peas?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 08:19 PM

I think the George Cross is a nautical medal. Wasn't it awarded to Silas, the ancient Marner?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 08:58 PM

I say to you of Apple, and to you of Microsoft, and to you of Intel and to all of you of Silicon Valley, NO! A thousand times no! You will not crucify this nation upon a Cross of Sand, By George!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 10:08 PM

I think that was the Southern Cross, Eiseley--the one called Jowadzhe.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 10:12 PM

Gracious, Amos. You don't seem to know your George from your T.S. Eliot.

They were quite different in many ways, you know. For one thing, Eliot, T.S. was born in St. Louis and Eliot, George was born in England. There are other, slightly minor, differences as well.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 10:27 PM

Is this the one you mean?


When you see the Southern Cross
For the first time
You understand now
Why you came this way
'Cause the truth you might be runnin' from
Is so small.
But it's as big as the promise
The promise of a comin' day.
So I'm sailing for tomorrow
My dreams are a dyin'.
I have my ship
And all her flags are a flyin'
She might be all that I have left
And music is her name.

Crosby, Stills and Nash have some fine songs, but the lyrics really need the melody to carry them along.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 11:06 PM

Are you guys mixing Mary Anne Evans up with Aurore Dudevant? Again?

Geez, Louise.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 11:12 PM

I'm not, but Amos is. But then, he lives in SoCal.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Mar 10 - 11:22 PM

Oh, Rapaire, you make such a stink. George Sand, T.S. Eliot, George Cross, and Eliot Cross, and George Eliot, and Eliot Sand...they are all brothers in their souls, you know. Don't be such a perfidious hair-splitter, I beg thee.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 10:14 AM

It was actually a southern cross--followed by a northern uppercut--that laid Rapaire low by KO in his last season as varsity boxing contender back at Pocatello State. His father managed to have all the news stories suppressed and the negatives burned. After all, that's what fathers are for. But the shiner was world class.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 10:51 AM

1. There is no place named "Pocatello State".
2. My father died when I was five.
3. I wasn't born and didn't grow up here.
4. I never attended any school here, but I did give some classes.
5. I boxed once, at age eight, and knocked my cousin out cold.
6. I have never boxed since -- it's silly.

Such a morass Amos has put himself in....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 11:45 AM

Oh, I'm sorry. I got the details all wrong. But the principle is clearly intact....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 03:07 PM

Rapaire has kindly informed us that he was not born. That would include being untimely ripped from someone's WOmb with a Vous. One has to ask, then, how his kindly benevolent Executive Directorship manages to materialize his allegedly corporate hologram into the Pocatello library once a month. P'raps he will be so good as to elucidate.

Now, as we wander on our way
We pleasure take in posts a-plenty;
To reach the 75 of Kay
Requires only one and twenty!
And BS bright and of good worth
From worry now has freed us
Discussing Booke Man's lack of birth
From care has surely freed us.
Type on, type on, you MOABs bold,
And spare no elocution
To reach that number, bright and gold,
Requires diligence on all our parts.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 03:10 PM

As I remember from my recent perusal of the MOAB corpus, Rapaire was born but his mother at some point rejected him and demanded his bellybutton back.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 04:16 PM

Yes, but Eiseley!!...that was then, and this is Now.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 04:48 PM

Eiseley, if you keep that up, we're all going to have to go back and read the entire thing. And that just isn't going to happen (though we do play "drop the needle" sometimes and wade back in and pick up random posts to re-read and enjoy).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 05:00 PM

Okay, okay.
Here's to Then and Now:

"The cold Duke was afraid of Now, for Now has warmth and urgency, and Then is dead and buried. Now might bring a certain knight of gay and shining courage?"but no!" the cold Duke muttered. "The Prince will break himself against a new and awful labor: a place too high to reach, a thing too far to find, a burden too heavy to lift." The Duke was afraid of Now, but he tampered with the clocks to see if they would go, out of a strange perversity, praying that they wouldn't. Tinkers and tinkerers and a few wizards who happened by tried to start the clocks with tools or magic words, or by shaking them and cursing, but nothing whirred or ticked. The clocks were dead, and in the end, brooding on it, the Duke decided he had murdered time, slain it with his sword, and wiped his bloody blade upon its beard and left it lying there, bleeding hours and minutes, its springs uncoiled and sprawling, its pendulum disintegrating."
James Thurber, Thirteen Clocks


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 06:49 PM

What I like about Eiseley
Is that she plays niseley.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 06:58 PM

Unlike Rapaire
Who plays too free.

Poor, poor, Amos. Tsk, tsk. A fine mind shattered and lost. How very, very sad. Let's take up a collection so he can spend some time at the NYCFTTS -- I'm sure they could find a closet or someplace where he can spend the brain cells he still has. I've got...let's see...a Canadian penny and couple of washers about the size of quarters.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 07:40 PM

I could make a suggestion, but I know that the quality of BS is not strained.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 08:30 PM

I dunno about that, Amos. I saw a bull once who was obviously having a difficult time...never mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 08:42 PM

Well, gee, Rapaire, maybe somebody stuck a couple of large washers up his butt, ya think??


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 10:02 PM

My oldest son (14 yrs) is on a school tour back East. Today on the way to New York City from Washington D.C. the bus drove through Amish country, including the town called Intercourse, Pennsylvania. He just telephoned and said he bought a shirt that said, "Intercourse: it's just like I thought it would be."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 10 - 10:05 PM

LOL!! Obviously you are raising him with a sense of humor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 12:19 AM

They probably support the entire town on the tourist trade.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 10:26 AM

Intercourse is (or was, I understand they changed the name) just down the road from Blue Ball, PA.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 10:27 AM

Please note that Big Bone Lick is in Kentucky and French Lick is in Indiana.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 10:36 AM

If I recall correctly, they would have to do a detour from any of the logical rooutes between DC and NYC to get to Intercourse; the school must just love stopping there....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 10:39 AM

The "visit to Amish country" is the PR billing. It just happens to include Intercourse, but they don't promote that part...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 01:29 PM

Heck, I don't see what's so special about the Amish. Every one I've known have been pretty good people.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 02:15 PM

Well, you would probably want to support any program that enlightened teenagers who thought "Amish" was the name of a rock band, no?

They ARE good people but a bit unusual and teaching the young to view them with equanimity is an important part of their education, even if it drives them to Intercourse.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 02:24 PM

I cannot wait! I WILL not wait!
Here's thirty seven thou and eight!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 02:25 PM

I'm sorry--I meant "thousands thirty-four point eight".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 02:36 PM

No scansion..."Here a pore lonely mind busted", to paraphrase Tom Sawyer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 02:47 PM

If you use "Here's thousands thirty-four point eight", ding-dong, it scan quite nicely with four strong beats per line.

Off with your head, Moriarty!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Mar 10 - 04:42 PM

You will shortly hear a knock on your door, Rapaire, unless you act soon and do as I have instructed you to do. That is a warning...


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