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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 12 Feb 07 - 07:20 PM
Rapparee 12 Feb 07 - 08:50 PM
JennyO 12 Feb 07 - 08:51 PM
GUEST,Blind Rive r in Blind RDUNK 12 Feb 07 - 09:13 PM
JennyO 12 Feb 07 - 09:29 PM
Rapparee 12 Feb 07 - 09:30 PM
Rapparee 12 Feb 07 - 09:45 PM
Amos 13 Feb 07 - 12:01 AM
GUEST,Stilly River Sage 13 Feb 07 - 01:20 AM
GUEST,Bldind DRunk in Blind River 13 Feb 07 - 01:21 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 Feb 07 - 01:35 AM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 13 Feb 07 - 01:52 AM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 09:13 AM
Amos 13 Feb 07 - 09:34 AM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 09:44 AM
Amos 13 Feb 07 - 10:07 AM
JennyO 13 Feb 07 - 10:20 AM
Bunnahabhain 13 Feb 07 - 11:47 AM
Little Hawk 13 Feb 07 - 12:10 PM
Amos 13 Feb 07 - 12:22 PM
Little Hawk 13 Feb 07 - 12:33 PM
Little Hawk 13 Feb 07 - 12:40 PM
Amos 13 Feb 07 - 01:51 PM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 01:53 PM
MMario 13 Feb 07 - 01:55 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 Feb 07 - 03:47 PM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 04:41 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 13 Feb 07 - 05:58 PM
Little Hawk 13 Feb 07 - 06:14 PM
Acme 13 Feb 07 - 06:27 PM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 06:33 PM
Little Hawk 13 Feb 07 - 06:35 PM
JennyO 13 Feb 07 - 07:36 PM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 07:50 PM
JennyO 13 Feb 07 - 09:04 PM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 11:10 PM
Amos 13 Feb 07 - 11:39 PM
Rapparee 13 Feb 07 - 11:41 PM
Little Hawk 13 Feb 07 - 11:53 PM
Rapparee 14 Feb 07 - 12:08 AM
Acme 14 Feb 07 - 12:15 AM
Little Hawk 14 Feb 07 - 01:38 AM
MMario 14 Feb 07 - 07:53 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Feb 07 - 08:35 AM
Rapparee 14 Feb 07 - 08:53 AM
Amos 14 Feb 07 - 10:10 AM
Acme 14 Feb 07 - 10:31 AM
JennyO 14 Feb 07 - 10:48 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Feb 07 - 12:35 PM
Acme 14 Feb 07 - 12:38 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 07:20 PM

Shane:

Sober up, lad!! Have a glass of nice warm tap-water, there ya go. Who in hell are you talking to, anyway?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 08:50 PM

That's good, Amos. As long as you're not running something strange like MAC OS X at home.

By the way, Shane McBride joined the Trappists -- the ones of "strict observance" and is currently in their monastery in Madagascar. His name in the Trappists is Brother Crispin Fiacre, OCSO. Someone is posting as Shane used to before he "got religion" and that person is an imposter and an identity thief.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 08:51 PM

Maybe Gluon is humping his leg. A good duck-dog will do that.

I feel honoured to have my first pinwheel number. It's rather hot here, so at the moment I am using it as a small personal fan.

I may start a small collection. Only 85 posts to go till 16191!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind Rive r in Blind RDUNK
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 09:13 PM

RApaire is teh worst FLIPPIN' LIAR that ever lived! Every fliippin' ghging he sahys is a baldfaced lie! He should be shot, drove over, and throwed to the flippin' dogs!

I am the real Shane! FLIP ME!!!!!!!! Why won't anyone listen?

I have been flippin' robbed of my name and muy repitition! I am gonna take legal flippin' ackshun and make uyou pay, Rapaire!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 09:29 PM

Methinks Shane might be suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder.

Gawd knows how many other personalities could be lurking there!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 09:30 PM

"Shane":

You have to be able to prove your identity in court, and the real Shane McBride is many, many miles away. And so I'm not at all worried, you imposter!

Besides, I'm not in Canada. You can't get money if I ain't there.

Your friend,
Rapaire


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 09:45 PM

Besides, "Shane," the only lawyers you know are the prosecutors.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 12:01 AM

Shane,

So...who WERE you yapping at/talking to?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Stilly River Sage
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 01:20 AM

What the hell is she doing with her hand?

I can't figure out how she can 1) bend it this direction or 2) what game the camera is playing or if 3) she has some strange double-jointed condition I've never heard about? (Not that I care, but I was flipping through a slide show of the Grammy folks and this turned up).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bldind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 01:21 AM

I was talkin' to the flippin' guy who is imposturizing me! He calls himself Crispin Fiacre and he is totally bathouse flippin' nuts! Keep the sick flipper AWAY from me!

As for you, Rapaire, you are pushin' yer luck, man. DON'T make me come down there!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 01:35 AM

As distasteful as it is to have Shane leeching onto Mom, things could be worse. It could be Shatner another Canadian fellow.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 01:52 AM

Rapaire started this, man! He threw the first flippin' stone and you don't do that to people that live in glass houses, eh? Cos if you do that then...the glass can, like, get broken. And that will get you seven years bad luck, eh? No time off for good behaveyor neither. Anyways, Rapaire threw the first flippin' punch here. I din't. It is his flippin' fault that I am here. I ain't leavin' till he flippin' apologzies and admits that I am ME and Cripsin ain't!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 09:13 AM

Dear "Shane":

Of course you are you. Who else would you be? Me? Amos? Little Hawk? Bee-Dubya-Ell? Jenny-O? Mom herself? W*****m S*****r? Alexander King McKenzie? Don Whatsizname, the ex-hockey player? Tony Blair?

I realize, "Shane," that you have identity problems, but a good psychiatrist can help you with that and other problems. You might even get a handle on who you really are and begin to understand yourself.

Let me reiterate, "Shane," that you are whoever you are. And I am sorry for you.

There.

Your friend,
Rapaire


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 09:34 AM

The trouble is, good Rapaire, that you are speaking to a projection -- but then, what else is new?

In this case, though, you are talking to one of a series of projected personalities being generated by our own Little Hawk -- an identitity which is, of course, itself a projection. One, I should add, that seems to have subdivided itself into multiple sub-projections, one of which poses as a chimpanzee, one as Shane, one as an averweight toupee-adorned wannabe film star, and several other more minor ones.

It is clear, in retrospect, that whoever owns the Little Hawk projection is a being of great creative power, but a power which has sadly become dissipated, dissolute, and degraded into managing this menagerie of substitute beingnesses. This is, possibly, a response to the impact of drugs and alcohol used too often. Or a solution to the incurable influence of a domineering mother. Or, perhaps, a long history of bad luck with house pets.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 09:44 AM

No, Amos. "Shane" is real. I even found a picture of him (of course, he was cleaned up because he WAS just out of jail). But you can tell who it is by what he's holding.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 10:07 AM

Oh, right, Rapaire. Shane "Blind Drunk in Blind River" is gonna sit around in an orange "Texas Longhorns" shirt. And you want me to buy this conflated piece of reactionary nonsense, this assertion based only on phantasms? You must be some kinda Republican.

Whoever that guy is, if it was his girlfriend who stck the pacifier in his hand while he was napping and phtographed it, I bet she is now an ex-girlfriend.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 10:20 AM

a solution to the incurable influence of a domineering mother

You may be on to something here, Amos!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 11:47 AM

I think I have a use for Shane. It'll use all his best qualities, and get him a medal, worldwide thanks, and a case of whatever he wants to drink....


We set him on the wonderful people who write viruses etc, he'll be far more of a deterrent than the legal system. Because it's my idea, he starts on the pains in the arse who got to me a few days ago!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 12:10 PM

LOL! What a super lot of possible reasons for my plight, Amos. The one about the pets was inspired. You know, I have had to resist the severe temptation to be several other projections as well.

Just think of the possibilities...

It has its risks. Bobert went through a phase where he thought that I was Martin Gibson! That was pretty surreal. It was then that I realized the drawbacks to living a fantasy existence on an internet forum. I did post back then the odd time as "Kent Ovation" and "Taylor Takemine/Takamine", just to piss off Martin....whoever he really was (and that remains a mystery).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 12:22 PM

Well, the real Martin Gibson died an unfortunate death which was documented in the Mudcat Carnivale fiction thread. The death was the only factual thing about it.

Thank you for not splitting your attention into even more projections. I am sure it is for the good that you do not spread your mental margarine too thin.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 12:33 PM

What??? Are you serious? (about Martin) Or is that just an analogy of some sort?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 12:40 PM

You could maybe provide a link to that thread?

Actually, Amos, I remember how it all got started (my projections on Mudcat). I got the idea from Spaw. He was doing all this weird shit back when I first came here with Paw and Cletus and the Reg Boys, the NYCFTTS, the Little Pissant, and Cleigh O'Possum....all fictional characters or setups of one kind or another.

I thought it looked like a lot of fun, so I figured I'd try it myself with some original characters of my own. In the case of Shatner, I was making use of a character that already existed in real life and had a rich background with humorous possibilities, which made my job easier. Besides, Shatner and the whole Star Trek thing was just irresistible. That's the God's truth of it, I swear.

So it's all Spaw's fault. All of it. Without him it would not have happened. I am an innocent man. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 01:51 PM

So, the truth comes out... a truth which in hindsight should have been obvious. Little Hawk is a projection of Spaw, another broke-dick mammalucca effort to keep Big Mick and Rick Fielding and BSeed and Swanno laughing a lot.

Well, it certainly has been a rip-roaring success --- well, a rip-roaring something. The sweet smell of success and the tear-inspiring fumes of the Spaw-Hawk Axis of Methane would never be confused with each other.

I suspect Shambles will have something to say about all this. I am not sure what, but that has never been an impediment before.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 01:53 PM

I, on the other hand, am a projection.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 01:55 PM

No - LH and 'Spaw are seperate entities. I have been in the presence of both. Granted, not at the same time, but I don't think either could morph into the other even if a consumate master of disguise.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 03:47 PM

So Spaw and Little Hawk are both projections! Mmario's the projector!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 04:41 PM

I'm the projectile.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 05:58 PM

No, you WILL be the flippin' projectyle, man! After I get aholt of you, eh?

I been considerin' yer apolagy. I might let ya off the hook this time. Maybe.

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 06:14 PM

One of my deepest regrets is that Mr Fielding isn't around here for me to amuse any longer. He was the first person who twigged to the fact that I was writing the BDiBR stuff. He recognized that it was basically a "Doug and Bob McKenzie" kind of thing...typical Canadian "hoser" material...and then he worked out that I was the one doing it. It wasn't easy to fool Rick for very long.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 06:27 PM

You sure were obnoxious until I figured out that it was you. Then I could just sit back and laugh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 06:33 PM

Well, even though we knew that Mom had arrived, to have "Shane" himself post here demonstrates that Mom has been accepted by both ends of Society.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 06:35 PM

Yes, well, Shane is supposed to be obnoxious after all. It's a tough job, but someone's got to do it, right?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 07:36 PM

Rapaire, I thought YOU were the creator, and WE were all projections - figments of your fertile imagination. If you are a projection too, where does that leave us?

Oh dear! I'm confused. I think I need to lie down...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 07:50 PM

Mah goodness, Miz Scarlet, ah feel plumb faint!

I AM the Creator. I am the First and the Last, the Creator and the Created. I created Myself out of the Nothingness and Chaos I had created and all of you are My creations. Do not try to comprehend this, but simply accept it, for your minds are too puny to grasp it and besides, it's a lot of work and your mind could easily go "pfft!".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 09:04 PM

Oh - well that's all right then. I feel better now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 11:10 PM

Yes, I wanted it that way.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 11:39 PM

Do you spell "jerk" with a "zhd" or with a "g", Mister Creator?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 11:41 PM

Amos, I will let you spell it any way you want, for you are my beloved son in whom I am well pleased.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Feb 07 - 11:53 PM

I've been wondering how we should all worship you, O Great One? What do you require of us? Are there any heathen we can smite on your behalf? Will it be necessary to sacrifice virgins? If so, Blind River, Ontario is in deep trouble...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 12:08 AM

I'm not so unsure of myself that I demand worship and sacrifice. Geez, what kinda Creator do think I am? No, all worship and sacrifice is totally voluntary. If you wanna, fine and if you don't, that's okay too, as long as you like spending eternity standing on your tippy-toes up to your nose in boiling...human excrement. See? Free will and free choices, that's me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 12:15 AM

Ewwww

Let's see what's on another channel. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 01:38 AM

Yea, verily, and forsooth, for I have heard the Word of the Lord this day! He hath bequeathed unto us free choice. Let us all rejoice in His name! Hosanna in the highest!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 07:53 AM

SNOW DAY!

It's a SNOW day!

it's a snow DAY!

We got snow!

no w*rk!

SNOW DAY!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 08:35 AM

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Happy Valentine's Day, Mom

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 08:53 AM

AND to all the other lovely ladies here. Mom's the mostest, but you guys are almost there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 10:10 AM

Stilly, wait!!!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 10:31 AM

What? From changing the channel?

I think I want to watch a channel with warm beaches and clear blue water and a beach towel and a swim suit are enough for a comfortable nap in a hammock slung between a couple of palm trees. . . I'm tired of all of Little Hawk's cold weather dragging around down here! Brrrr!

Thanks for the valentine's greeting! More to the point than the short "Happy VD!" in an email that a friend sent this morning. No, I don't think so. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 10:48 AM

Thank you Rapaire. It's a pleasure to be here!

And Happy Valentine's Day, Mom!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 12:35 PM

Dear Mom,

Please have a talk with your cousin, Mother Nature, about this cold weather.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Feb 07 - 12:38 PM

BWL, I was hoping you had the warm weather and clear water and beaches to offer. Not so? Florida = warm, no?


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