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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 24 Jul 04 - 02:15 PM
saulgoldie 24 Jul 04 - 03:07 PM
Acme 24 Jul 04 - 03:20 PM
Rapparee 24 Jul 04 - 03:33 PM
Amos 24 Jul 04 - 04:30 PM
Rapparee 24 Jul 04 - 06:15 PM
Little Hawk 24 Jul 04 - 06:35 PM
CarolC 24 Jul 04 - 07:07 PM
Little Hawk 24 Jul 04 - 07:23 PM
Acme 24 Jul 04 - 07:34 PM
Amos 24 Jul 04 - 07:38 PM
CarolC 24 Jul 04 - 07:43 PM
freda underhill 24 Jul 04 - 07:51 PM
Amos 24 Jul 04 - 08:58 PM
Rapparee 24 Jul 04 - 10:32 PM
Rapparee 24 Jul 04 - 10:34 PM
Acme 24 Jul 04 - 11:20 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Jul 04 - 11:55 PM
Amos 25 Jul 04 - 01:12 AM
Acme 25 Jul 04 - 02:43 AM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 10:47 AM
CarolC 25 Jul 04 - 11:06 AM
CarolC 25 Jul 04 - 11:11 AM
Amos 25 Jul 04 - 11:47 AM
CarolC 25 Jul 04 - 11:54 AM
freda underhill 25 Jul 04 - 11:55 AM
Acme 25 Jul 04 - 12:15 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 02:08 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 02:11 PM
Amos 25 Jul 04 - 02:14 PM
CarolC 25 Jul 04 - 02:14 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 02:17 PM
Amos 25 Jul 04 - 02:19 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 02:27 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Jul 04 - 02:58 PM
Acme 25 Jul 04 - 03:25 PM
CarolC 25 Jul 04 - 03:56 PM
CarolC 25 Jul 04 - 04:03 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:20 PM
Amos 25 Jul 04 - 05:27 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:30 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:31 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:31 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:32 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:32 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:33 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:33 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:34 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:34 PM
Rapparee 25 Jul 04 - 05:34 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 02:15 PM

Saul, did you read this thread? from one end to the other? The easiest way to do that is to click on the thread title. If you come back to your computer in about an hour the whole thing should have loaded. . . we'll see you back here in about a week. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: saulgoldie
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 03:07 PM

No, Stilly. I didn't. I was told to just jump in anywhere. Ya mean I got to read the whole thing? Man! That'll take all WEEK! OK, then. If I must...They don't pay me all that much here, anyway. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 03:20 PM

This is probably one thread that you don't need to read from front to back, but you'll certainly be entertained by it! I must confess I accidentally put in a few bits with some substance a couple of times, but I've gotten over that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 03:33 PM

There IS a secret Mudcat Code. Bee-Dubya-Ell can fill you in on it, if he evers sobers up enough. Or Amos could. Or SRS or Rustic. Or LH. Or even me. Here's a hint:

White on white
Lace on satin
Blue velvet ribbons on her bowque...beaukay...bunch of flowers.

I didn't say it was a very GOOD hint.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 04:30 PM

'S ok, man. It's not a very good code, either! :>)

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 06:15 PM

Something actually sent "in the clear" is an unbreakable code, Amos, since there's nothing encrypted.

Besides, it demonstrates to everyone how open and honest those who post here are.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 06:35 PM

Sounds like an allusion to Penelope Rutledge at her marriage. I wonder how she's doing with the Spanish boyfriend?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 07:07 PM

4000th post!

I win!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 07:23 PM

What??? 4000th since when?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 07:34 PM

He got it white right.
White on White it is!

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 07:38 PM

CarolC:

This is difficult indeed. I am sorry to tell you that your counting is, well, delusory, frankly. Here on the MOAB we have to sustain the distinction between BS and delusion so as to ensure we can return to reality and not fall over the edge.

You may have missed counting some of the posts along the way, thinking of them as chads, and although this is understandable we have to go with the numbers used by the automated counting mechanism that shows the length of the thread in posts in the index.

According to that standard, I already wopn the 4000th post, and have just received the Golden Narcissus award to prove it....

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 07:43 PM

I am sorry to tell you that your counting is, well, delusory, frankly.

Counting?

What's that?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: freda underhill
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 07:51 PM

is time speeding up or is it just the MOAB?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 08:58 PM

It's the sling-shot effect; it always occur when you tear through a gravity well and out the other side. Ask Rapaire to explain it. The 4000th post acted like a large dense spot at the bottom of a gravity well, and we accelerated as we drew closer and closer to it and then SNAP!! we went around it like a giant crack-the-whip chain on a frozen lake in Connecticut in mid-winter. Wheeeee!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 10:32 PM

It did??? And I missed it???

Actually, Carol, it's quite simple. As you know, time is relative. Amos, traveling at nearly the speed of light, has his "time" slow relative to yours. Of course, time (i.e., duration) actually neithers slows down or speeds up, but it seems like it to those involved. Thus, Amos is living "faster" than you are, partly because he lives in California and, as you also know, California is, like, its own thing, ya know? Anyway, because Amos is one fast dude, he thinks that he claimed the 4,000th post -- and, to him, he did. You also have the 4,000th post, because while Amos is moving at nearly the speed of light you aren't, so postings, like time, moves more "slowly" for you. This causes paradoxes, or seeming paradoxes, which have been addressed by Dr. Peter Zoller-Greer and as Kawai demonstrated in 1994, Poincaré gauge theory of (2+1)-dimensional gravity is developed. Of course, fundamental gravitational field variables are dreibein fields and Lorentz gauge potentials, and the theory is underlain with the Riemann-Cartan space-time. The most general gravitational Lagrangian density, which is at most quadratic in curvature and torsion tensors and invariant under local Lorentz transformations and under general coordinate transformations, is given. Gravitational field equations are studied in detail, and solutions of the equations for weak gravitational fields are examined for the case with a static, "spin" less point like source. We find, among other things, the following. (1) Solutions of the vacuum Einstein equation satisfy gravitational field equations in the vacuum in this theory. (2) For a class of the parameters in the gravitational Lagrangian density, the torsion is "frozen" at the place where "spin" density of the source field is not vanishing. In this case, the field equation actually agrees with the Einstein equation, when the source field is "spin" less. (3) A teleparallel theory (developed in a previous paper) is "included as a solution" in a limiting case. (4) A Newtonian limit is obtainable if the parameters in the Lagrangian density satisfy certain conditions.

Thus, both you and Amos have posted the 4,000th post! BWL might also make the 4,000th post, and LH has passed it and is working on post 4,021.

Idaho being the conservative place it is, I won't reach it until sometime in the "year" 2015.

I certainly hope all is clear now. If it isn't, let me know and I'll try to clarify it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 10:34 PM

There was a young fellow named Fisk
Who at fencing was exceedingly brisk.
So fast was his action
The Fitzgerald contration
Turned his rapier to a disk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 11:20 PM

I passed 4000 ages ago--this makes 4313 for me. It's all relative, isn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Jul 04 - 11:55 PM

Nah! It's the humidity. Let us not forget that Carol lives in Columbus, Georgia. If those of us living in the deep south were to live at the same pace as those who live in less humid climes we would all keel over from heat exhaustion in short order. We must live more slowly as a simple survival mechanism. In fact, I personally live on the edge of a swamp so it may be weeks before I reach the 4000th post. I'll letcha know when I get there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 01:12 AM

Rapaire is using this opportunity to post sour grapes with all this cultural relativism foofoo. There was only one Post #4000 here -- otherwise, you would be undermining the whole mechanism of fair dibsies. And with it, the entire fabric of Western civilization, which is BUILT on the concept of fair dibsies.

Better think twice, Mister Sciencehead!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:43 AM

BWL--you'd better get busy. Mudcat says you've only sent 2307 so far!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 10:47 AM

Sciencehead?

Why...why...

Listen here, you fundamentalistic creationist! It's not only all relative, but it all depends upon what base you use! In binary, post 4,000 is really post 111110100000! In hexadecimal it's fa0. In octal is 7640. In base 36 it's 334. I'll leave it to you to figure it out in other bases, if your beliefs allow that, ya scientific Philistine.

You don't know the difference between Cartesian coordinates and Fourier transformations! You think polygons turn into frogs! You couldn't integrate a nested trig function if you used a computer! You think the Laws of Thermodynamics have to do with the speed limit and the Theory of Relativity has to do with marriage laws! You'd stop and ask directions at a P-N junction! You think string theory has to do with guitars! And every moring you pray that Maxwell's Demon will overlook you that day! You'd toss metallic sodium into water and use liquid oxygen to light your charcoal grill! You think that if diatomic oxygen is good to breath, then triatomic must be better! To you, T-A-G is a game kids play! You couldn't tell a rhizome from a root, and you think that rhodophyta are green! Aspergillus wouldn't find your lungs hospitable if you coated them with sugar! Your stamen is weak and your pistil droops! And you think Rhizopus Nigircans is related to Pencillium Notatum!

Humph!

Sciencehead indeed!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 11:06 AM

In fact, I personally live on the edge of a swamp so it may be weeks before I reach the 4000th post.

Yeah, I can tell you're in a slower climate even than me. We moved out of Columbus a little more than a year ago. We were in Michigan for about six months, and now we're in Alabama (near Columbus). At the rate you're going, you'll probably get the post card we sent you from the Henry Ford Museum in about ten years.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 11:11 AM

Your stamen is weak and your pistil droops!

Woah... Amos, did you see what he said to you?!

(everybody take cover... this is getting serious)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 11:47 AM

Nah, don't worry, Carol. Mister Sciencehead has just had his pustule penetrated and is spurting lexicon all over the place. It's okay -- it relieves the pressure of too many categorical imperatives striking in the same place at the same time, an occupational hazard in the librarian business. His accusations are just falsehoods gussied up with purple syllables. No biggie.

Relativity is a wonderful thing, but take it too far you shouldn't do.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 11:54 AM

Yeah, even relativity is relative, right Amos?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: freda underhill
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 11:55 AM

Philosophers have long wondered why socks have this habit of getting lost, and why humans always end up with large collections of unmatched odd socks. One school of thought says that socks are very antisocial creatures, and have a deep sense of rivalry. In particular, two socks of the same design have feelings of loathing towards each other and hence it is nearly impossible to pair them (e.g. a blue sock will usually be found nestling up to a black one, rather than its fellow blue sock)

On the other hand, quantum theorists explain it all by a generalized exclusion principle - it is impossible for two socks to be in the same state, and when it is in danger of happening, one of the socks has to vanish. Indeed the Uncertainty Principle also comes in - the only time you know where a sock is, is when you are wearing it, and hence unable to be sure exactly how fast it is moving. The moment you stop moving and look at your sock, it then starts falling to pieces, changing color, or otherwise becoming indeterminate.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 12:15 PM

Watch it when you start throwing around Rhizopus nigricans, Rapaire! It's one we specialize in.

Otherwise known as bread mold.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:08 PM

My old botany prof, a Franciscan friar (yes, like in "Romeo and Juliet"), always wanted to see the sexual reproduction of R. Nigricans. Even though some of his samples came from as far away as California, the reproduction was always asexual (which actually doesn't say much for California, does it?). Finally, I sent him some from Korea and lo and behold! he died before it arrived.

Amos thinks square roots are vegetables.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:11 PM

Hey! If Bobert comes and posts here, don't nobody kick him in the nuts, okay?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:14 PM

The rate of expulsion from the punctured pustule is abating, a very good sign. Prognosis for the rehabilitation of actual-versus-lexical perspective in this case is high, probably attributable to his experience with firearms...I am pleased.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:14 PM

I think we should discuss the reproductive habits of snails. They are hermaphroditic, and each individual snail can perform either the male or female function of sexual reproduction as needed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:17 PM

Can they be both at once? Sort of like the gay young man of Khartoum?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:19 PM

Gee, that's interesting, and all, but what does it leave to be discussed?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:27 PM

I wanna talk some more about Rhizopus Nigricans! It's a lot more important that snails. It's almost but not quite as neat as talking about rhodophyta.

Did everyone know that Amos was once arrested for committing unnatural logarithms?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 02:58 PM

I am stunned, shocked and flummoxed once again. I had assumed that CarolC had moved back to Columbus after completing her adventures in the wilds of Detroit and other such Michigan places. Now I find she lives in Alabama. And I almost lives in Alabama. I can drive from my house in Florida to the Alabama line in a lot less time than it generally takes to decipher one of Amos's posts. That means that CarolC and I are almost cousins, 'cause if we both lived in Alabama we would be cousins. It's the law.

It also means that when I participate in the Street Arts Festival in Eufaula, AL on Sept. 11, it will be even easier to find where she's hiding out and harass her and her accordion! Ha!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 03:25 PM

BWL--have you read The World Accordion to Carol?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 03:56 PM

Can they be both at once? Sort of like the gay young man of Khartoum?

I believe they can. Someone should write a poem about it I think.

It also means that when I participate in the Street Arts Festival in Eufaula, AL on Sept. 11, it will be even easier to find where she's hiding out and harass her and her accordion! Ha!

Absolutely! You would be required to come visit us, or we'd have to come pester you. We're right down the road from Eufala. Same highway even.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 04:03 PM

Is there even such a thing as a natural logarithm? I always thought logarithms were by definition unnatural.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:20 PM

A lonely young snail of Khartoum
Took another snail up to his room,
And all through the night
They had a great fight
About who would do what and to whom.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:27 PM

There are logarithms which just occur naturally, Carol, but people like Rapaire insist it is a choice of lifestyle. Sigh.

Rap, I knew that limerick in a form which involved a fairy named Broome, who took a Lesbian up to his room... but the principle is the same.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:30 PM

Shakespeare filed the serial numbers offen Hollingshed and others, I can do the same thing.

Amos believes in imaginary numbers, Carol. That's why his checkbook never balances.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:31 PM

3^3


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:31 PM

SQRT 16 * 2


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:32 PM

4th prime number


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:32 PM

SQRT 36


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:33 PM

SQRT 25


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:33 PM

SQRT 16


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:34 PM

Second prime


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:34 PM

Cube root of 8


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jul 04 - 05:34 PM

Mine!!!!


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