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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 10 May 17 - 10:05 PM
Rapparee 10 May 17 - 08:18 PM
Acme 09 May 17 - 11:46 PM
Rapparee 09 May 17 - 10:30 PM
gnu 09 May 17 - 06:09 PM
keberoxu 09 May 17 - 03:12 PM
Rapparee 09 May 17 - 09:19 AM
Rapparee 08 May 17 - 10:00 PM
gnu 08 May 17 - 04:55 PM
Amos 08 May 17 - 01:56 PM
Rapparee 07 May 17 - 09:34 PM
Acme 07 May 17 - 11:38 AM
Amos 06 May 17 - 11:31 PM
Rapparee 06 May 17 - 10:20 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 May 17 - 04:51 PM
keberoxu 06 May 17 - 12:07 PM
Donuel 06 May 17 - 07:30 AM
Amos 06 May 17 - 07:29 AM
Amos 06 May 17 - 07:26 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 May 17 - 05:30 AM
Acme 05 May 17 - 11:43 PM
Rapparee 05 May 17 - 08:50 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 May 17 - 06:16 PM
gnu 05 May 17 - 11:40 AM
Rapparee 05 May 17 - 08:35 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 05 May 17 - 05:56 AM
Acme 04 May 17 - 10:41 PM
gnu 04 May 17 - 09:29 PM
Rapparee 01 May 17 - 03:49 PM
keberoxu 01 May 17 - 12:21 PM
Rapparee 01 May 17 - 08:47 AM
Rapparee 01 May 17 - 08:45 AM
Rapparee 01 May 17 - 08:43 AM
keberoxu 30 Apr 17 - 05:01 PM
Donuel 30 Apr 17 - 09:27 AM
gnu 29 Apr 17 - 10:44 PM
Rapparee 29 Apr 17 - 08:46 PM
Acme 29 Apr 17 - 06:48 PM
Acme 28 Apr 17 - 08:42 PM
Rapparee 28 Apr 17 - 08:30 PM
gnu 28 Apr 17 - 02:17 PM
Donuel 28 Apr 17 - 12:03 PM
Acme 28 Apr 17 - 11:42 AM
Donuel 28 Apr 17 - 11:30 AM
Rapparee 28 Apr 17 - 10:03 AM
gnu 27 Apr 17 - 02:31 PM
Rapparee 27 Apr 17 - 01:17 PM
keberoxu 27 Apr 17 - 12:34 PM
Rapparee 27 Apr 17 - 09:06 AM
Donuel 26 Apr 17 - 09:28 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 May 17 - 10:05 PM

Just back from a loverly birthday gathering on honor of the Godfather Skipper Kendall Morse, who is now eighty-something. He and Jacqui flew into town yesterday and we spent a lovely afternoon wandering around Hillsborough. Tonight we drove out to Janie's where she and Dani laid on roast chicken, salad, home-made bread, baby potato salad, and all good things to drink. Plus a real humdinger of a cake for the Skipper, and ice cream and single malt to boot. Songs and misty sentiments alla round. Good times, good times. Kendall and Jacqui did "Carrying Nelson Home" which reduced us to tears.

Tomorrow we head west to Asheville where Chance and Suzetter Shiver are hosting a house concert for my buckaroo pal, Steve Cormier, which should be a grand old kick.

Who knew retirement could be so much fun? Don't tell Trump! He'd figure out a way to ruin it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 May 17 - 08:18 PM

If only it were that easy to teach adults to read the newspaper!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 May 17 - 11:46 PM

Figuring out retirement and pensions - that is higher math if ever I saw it.

Hey, MOM, in the last 20 minutes of our after-school tutoring program, I pulled out a copy of the local daily paper and showed my sixth grader how to read the newspaper. Most important stories above the fold, the jumps to finish them inside the section, what is in each section, how to read the weather map, what letters to the editor are, and, to her delight, a page of four-color daily comic strips. Of all the things we've worked on this semester, I think learning to read the paper might be the most important one of all. I'll bring one to each session until the end of the school year. (I just wanted MOM to know they they don't always have to be used in layers of dirt and mulch in the garden to keep weeds out of the broccoli - sometimes people do actually read them!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 May 17 - 10:30 PM

I started working a 4, sorting coal for the CB&Q railroad. I put in six hours before school and six after; for this I was paid twenty-five cents per week (before taxes, etc.). At six I got a job in the textile mill collecting lint off the floor under the looms until I started coughing up lint and blood -- for a raise to thirty-five cents a week (ditto the taxes thing). I was ten then and delivered 407 newspapers before breakfast and in the evening, in blazing heat, tornadoes, blizzards, driving hail storms...but I was making seven DOLLARS every two weeks (ditto taxes). We didn't need work permits because the people who issued them were taking a piece of my pay as "gratuity." But it did help feed my widowed mother, great-great maiden aunt, widowed grandmother, and three siblings.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 09 May 17 - 06:09 PM

Got my bank statement for April. Right there in black and white : Direct Deposit CANADA PENSION PLAN. PARTAAAAY! Well, it doesn't say "PARTAAAAY!" but....

I started working at 12 years old at odd jobs (shoveling snow, mowing lawns, trimming hedges, whatever) around the neighbourhood and delivering newspapers in the morning and after school. I started running a trap line and hunted rabbits and sold them in winter BEFORE I delivered the morning newspapers when I was 14. I started getting paid by cheque at 15 (underage work permit) while working in the summer months for 9 hours a night shift seven days a week. Yeah... seven days a week... another special work permit.

So, I got my first CPP payment. If I live past 73 (the "break-even age" if you wait to draw CPP when you turn 65), it will have cost me. But, 73? Not fuckin' likely! Besides, price of living is going up faster than a slut's skirt in a brothel so the math is dicey, at best. Better to take the money and run... well, in my case, hobble.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 09 May 17 - 03:12 PM

Wishing Amos a very joyous Mudcatter reunion with his visiting friends this week.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 May 17 - 09:19 AM

Dunsiane: a castle in Fawdonshire, part of the Scottish Marches. formerly a stronghold of the "Steel Bonnets," it was used as a prison for English and Scottish women and girls taken on raids. These women, if not ransomed, were sold to brothels in London and on the Continent. It was once rumored that Shakespeare had visited there but more recent research has proven this false. The confusion with Dunsinane (vide "Macbeth") is due to the similarity in names; Dunsinane has three hill forts, one of which may have been used by Macbeth (Mac Bethad mac Findlaích, ca. 1005-August 15, 1057), but this has never been proven. Dunsiane castle was blown up on the orders of Oliver Cromwell in December, 1658.
             "Scottish Castles and Hill Forts," (Aberdeen, 2013).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 May 17 - 10:00 PM

Ah, Amos! Ceux de qui la conduite offre le plus à rire sont toujours sur autrui les premiers à médire. Si de probité tout était revêtu, si tous les c?urs était francs, justes et dociles, la plupart des vertus nous seraient inutiles, puisqu'on en met l'usage à pouvoir sans ennui
supporter dans nos droits l'injustice d'autrui.

gnu: Y así, del poco dormir y del mucho leer, se le secó el cerebro, de manera que vino a perder el juicio. Mas, la pluma es la lengua del alma: cuales fueren los conceptos que en ella se engendraren, tales serán sus escritos. On est ce qu'on veut. Seulement, il faut du temps pour être heureux. Beaucoup de temps. Le bonheur lui aussi est une longue patience.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 08 May 17 - 04:55 PM

Vive la France!!! Merci, eh la?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 08 May 17 - 01:56 PM

You are a warrantless rogue, sirrah, and a bread-sucking mongrel amongst great souls. Go to. Sir Willy was there at Dunsiane himself, gathering research material, when those ugly sisters accosted him, predicting your birth. You are unmasked as a varlet, a cutlet, a dried prune and a scurrilous derringer of dullwit. Go to.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 May 17 - 09:34 PM

King Lear? Three witches? Dost thou know the difference between King Lear and Macbeth, Good Amos? But 'tis the infirmity of your age: yet your hath ever but slenderly known yourself. But I must admit that your are not knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action-taking whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd, in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pander, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch: one whom I will beat into clamorous whining, if thou deniest the least syllable of thy addition. Nay, thou art not such! Perhaps you are a man more sinn'd against than sinning. But then, Amos, fair is foul, and foul is fair, and we merely over through the fog and filthy air. I know that you dare do all that may become a man and who dares do more, is none. But I shall now stop and call for you the innocent sleep; sleep, that knits up the ravell'd sleave of care, the death of each day's life, sore labor's bath, balm of hurt minds, great nature's second course, chief nourisher in life's feast.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 May 17 - 11:38 AM

My daughter is a wordsmith and a blacksmith.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 May 17 - 11:31 PM

I think you mean, sirrah, THIS mighty wordsmith, Alexander Pope, whose Dunciad is dedicated to Jonathon Swift.

Ah, Mom, there is no woe to match that of a wayward child! Sharper than a serpent's sting, one might even say!

If she must teem,
Create her child of spleen; that it may live,
And be a thwart disnatured torment to her!
Let it stamp wrinkles in her brow of youth;
With cadent tears fret channels in her cheeks;
Turn all her mother's pains and benefits
To laughter and contempt; that she may feel
How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is
To have a thankless child!


William Shakespeare, King Lear, 1605, regarding the birth of Rapaire as forecast to him by three witches on the moors outside Dunsinane.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 May 17 - 10:20 PM

I confess to plagiarizing Sonnet 29! I have repented just this once! I have sent a check to Mr. William Shakespeare/Shaxpeer/Shakspere/et. al. for one florin two groat quarter farthing to pay for all past, present, and future misconstructions and constructions of any of his works, in whole or in part.

But I have digressed, and must state

The Mighty Mother, and her son1 who brings        
The Smithfield Muses to the ear of Kings,        
I sing. Say you, her instruments the great!        
Call'd to this work by Dullness, Jove, and Fate;        
You by whose care, in vain decried and curst,              
Still Dunce the second reigns like Dunce the first;        
Say how the Goddess bade dear MOAB sleep,        
And pour'd her Spirit, o'er the land and deep.        
In eldest time, ere mortals writ or read,        
Ere Pallas issued from the Thund'rer's head,              
Dullness o'er all possess'd her ancient right,        
Daughter of Chaos and eternal Night:        
Fate in their dotage this fair idiot gave,        
Gross as her sire, and as her mother grave;        
Laborious, heavy, busy, bold, and blind,              
She ruled, in native anarchy, the mind.        
Still her old empire to restore she tries,        
For, born a Goddess, Dullness never dies.


1 The present humble wordsmith.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 May 17 - 04:51 PM

We are sure Don meant "awesome", not "awful". An easy mistake to make. We forgive him.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 06 May 17 - 12:07 PM

But what else is the Mudcat Cafe for?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 06 May 17 - 07:30 AM

This is more awful than I have seen in a long time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 May 17 - 07:29 AM

I had a friend, upon a time, and a mighty friend was he.
His tongue went loop-de-loop-de-loop, and his blade went "Snicker! Snee!".
His fingers typed words of delight
Dancing like light gone mad,
But he disappeared quite late, one night,
And the story turned out bad.

It seems his door was knocked upon,
When most folks were in bed,
By two large gents in wrinkled suits
And large, and wrinkled, heads.
They said he had been singled out,
That someone Big was pissed,
Berated him as a useless lout,
And a goddamned plagiarist.

They listed tomes and poems and works
He'd borrowed for a while,
And touted up and frilled out
In inimitable style.
The said he'd never paid a dime
To those whose works he'd borrow,
And all of this was coming back,
To visit him with sorrow.

They told him he was going away,
Into the darkling deeps
Where bad men worry through the day,
And fret too much to sleep.
Where hard men break, and life is hard,
And you scramble for what you get,
And there's no such thing as e-mail,
OR a high-speed Internet.

My friend, he blanched, he paled, he flinched,
He knew that he'd done wrong,
He knew that even then his screen
Held a half-baked stolen song.
He realized then -- too late, too late --
He should have listened, way back when,
To his dear Mom; too late, too late,
He was heard from ne'er again.

And so I come to this Cafe,
To write, and to forget,
But something still recalls to me
This friend I think on yet.
I never learned if he had ever
re-crossed that chilling schism
That split him from the world he loved,
On account of plagiarism.

So good folks all, pray heed this call,
Think of this man, cast doon,
And make your good works all your own,
From your own hand, alone.
Steal not the works of other men,
Or lines of other poets;
For if you do, they'll come for you,
And everyone will know it.

Seamus Sanmerci O'Toole
Lilting the Right -- Poems from the Lexington Express
Dublin Upp Press, New York, 1937


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 May 17 - 07:26 AM

When in disgrace with fortune and men's eyes
I all alone beweep my outcast state,
And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries,
And look upon myself, and curse my fate,
Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featured like him, like him with friends possessed,
Desiring this man's art, and that man's scope,
With what I most enjoy contented least;
Yet in these thoughts my self almost despising,
Haply I think on thee, and then my state,
Like to the lark at break of day arising
From sullen earth, sings hymns at heaven's gate;
   For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings
   That then I scorn to change my state with kings.

Wm Shakespeare, Sonnet 29.


Hi, Mom! What a week. Last weekend we drove five hours into the remote fastnesses of West Virginia where a quaint and warm country inn welcomed a gang of folkies seeking respite from the chaos of the Beltway. Lovely long weekend of song. Tuesday night an open mic, Thursday night a song circle, days doing house tasks, painting and such here and there. Next week the Skipper and his lady come down from the remote urban fastness of Portland, Maine to visit for a week. Dani and Janie and we have put our heads together to plan something. On the 11th we will drive plumb across NC to visit Chance and Suzette and Steve Cormier, cowboy singer par excellence. No telling what we might encounter on a junket like that!

Apologies for my absence of late. The days just keep ticking by. You know how it is.

It looks like I may have to repost my "Ballad of the Goddamned Plagiarist" poem for Mom. She always gets a kick out of it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 May 17 - 05:30 AM

Mom's sleeping on Max's porch and eating sandwiches was just a dream. A dream that seemed intensely real due to the altered state of consciousness induced by rolling in deer innards. Think Coleridge, laudanum, and "Kubla Khan", but substitute Mom, deer guts, and Max's porch.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 May 17 - 11:43 PM

How did MOM stray from sleeping on Max's porch and eating sandwiches to wandering off to roll in putrid deer innards? Someone contributing here seems to have an agenda.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 May 17 - 08:50 PM

My late little brother told me about dressing out a deer that was strung up on his sons' swing set. Everything went well, the meat was cut and stored in the freezer and a locker, and then he had to get rid of the garbage bag with the "remains." He loaded it into his car and went down to where the City parked the garbage trucks. He unloaded the bag and put it in the back of one of the trucks...and a leg bone fell out. He said that at midnight, in a dark parking area, when you're putting a bag of guts into a garbage truck, a deer femur looks remarkably like a human one. And he was very happy that there were no cops witnessing it!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 May 17 - 06:16 PM

Around here, we have a plethora of hunters idiots who think the proper way to dispose of what's left of a deer after cleaning is to toss it all in the back of a truck and dump it on the side of the road far enough away that it's somebody else's problem. The practice guarantees that any dog who wanders away from home for an hour or so will return stinking to both high and low heavens. It's usually a good idea to stock up on dog shampoo a few weeks before hunting season starts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 05 May 17 - 11:40 AM

Minds me a Duke. Beagle. We'd go huntin and that dawg would run straight for the cows. He'd roll in fresh cow shit til he was covered with it. Ol' Man Mullvahill would laugh his arse off and Dad would swear his ass off. Dad always had newspapers in the trunk. He'd wrap Duke up, sit him on the floor in back, and say "DON'T MOVE!!!!" We'd get home and Dad would put Duke on his chain. Then he'd put the hose on Duke, step on Duke's chain, slowly walk on the chain while Duke lurched to keep on his perfume, and stop about four feet away, all the time sayin "DON'T MOVE!!!!"

I took a shower today. I do every Cinco de Mayo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 May 17 - 08:35 AM

MOM!! Thank heavens you're okay! When we couldn't fin...what's that odor? Long dead deer innards? Mom, have you been hanging out with Bee-Dubya-Ell? We've told you and told you that he'd rub off on you! Yes, I know he's "one of your kids" and you love him in spite of his swamp miasma! What? You're telling me that Amos now smells the same way since he's moved to the South? Oh, NO! People will think that the MOABites stink up their little corner of the world! Okay, okay, I'll say it:

OKAY, MOM SAYS EVERYONE TAKES A BATH RIGHT NOW!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 05 May 17 - 05:56 AM

Oh, no! While we were away, Mom got bored and wandered off into the woods where she found a pile of rotten deer guts to roll in! Somebody's gonna have to give her a bath!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 May 17 - 10:41 PM

What a strange dream - MOM found herself face down in the turf (next to a beautiful azalea in full bloom) in Max's back yard. It seems between wind, rain, and falling trees, she was hidden and then staggered around for a while before one of the kids found her and led her to the porch to settle down on the big swing. She ate sandwiches, drank tea, and slept on that swing until the power came back on.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 04 May 17 - 09:29 PM

Power failure in the litter box has been scratched. MOM! ARE YOU OKAY?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 May 17 - 03:49 PM

A triple pallet load, taken into the driveway pad by one (1) forklift load. I'm glad I didn't have to help unload it!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 01 May 17 - 12:21 PM

Imperial Rex rocks, rolls, and rules.
Happy MAY Calenda, everyone.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 May 17 - 08:47 AM

Well, it's a good thing I awakened, that's all I've got to say! Saved MOM by the skin of her teeth.

Today the decking is supposed to be delivered.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 May 17 - 08:45 AM

WHAT! MOM!!!!! You were less than twelve hours from falling!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 May 17 - 08:43 AM

Huh? Wha?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 30 Apr 17 - 05:01 PM

WAKE UP RAPPAREE

you have dibs, not on THIS post, but on a post really close after this one


Acme, good for you for getting yourself, frog legs and all, outta that pot of hot water.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Apr 17 - 09:27 AM

Sappy be damned, good for you. An excellent patient and GP are often more open than specialists. Too many of us will dismiss real symptoms to aging. Even fewer of us have advanced research skills.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 29 Apr 17 - 10:44 PM

I am glad a proper diagnosis has been made and you can start to manage the problem(s). I wish you all the best with this. I'll stop before I get sappy. You take care of you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Apr 17 - 08:46 PM

Since the treatment for PMR involves the use of corticosteroids you probably won't be eligible for the Olympics or other things like that. Try to take it in stride and know that there are others who are also not eligible for medical reasons.

Seriously, be careful with those steroids. You can feel great and really overdo, and prednisone can make it easier to tear a tendon. Don't let the possibilities stop you from taking medicine.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Apr 17 - 06:48 PM

It dawns on me that since here on MOM's front porch and/or saggy-chaired living room sofa and love seat we've seen accounts of tons of surgeries and everything but Rap's x-rays, we've heard about gnu's tests and Amos's tooth travails, that I might drop in a note that isn't a broad-based announcement, but it answers questions I've had for months now and is the reason my garden is so late this year. (If it wasn't for the garden I wouldn't say anything.) PMR is the diagnosis I learned from early April, and it is a relief to have treatment after nearly a year of gradually increasing muscle pain. At least I know what to expect of the treatment; prior to this I didn't have a clue as to what was going on. I was assertive with my GP (whose tests were good, but showed nothing - the inflammation doesn't always show up), I did more research and asked to see a rheumatologist. After the "ah-ha" moment that something actually was wrong I knew what it was before I went in because I have a graduate degree and I work in a research library - I can Google Boolean keywords with the best of them. But I didn't tell the doctor what I thought it was, I made sure I described all of my symptoms precisely. And she confirmed my suspicions. Talk about the frog in the pot of hot water - it took me a long time to finally decide there was more than just aging happening.

I feel much better now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Apr 17 - 08:42 PM

Revealing? Well, Mark Spitz might be jealous, but Michael Phelps . . . pardon me while I swoon for a few minutes. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Apr 17 - 08:30 PM

After much, much research in libraries all over Canada I was able to locate a photograph of our very own gnu in a Speedo. Yes, he was a little younger then, but nonetheless it's him! You can tell! Yes, the Speedo is a tad revealing, but....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 28 Apr 17 - 02:17 PM

FRESH greenie beanies from Florida!!!!! $2.99 a pound but I got that beat because Sobeys had greenie beanies on sale for $1.99 a pound almost a month ago. I waited until they ran out (I knows the produce manager, see?) and got a rain cheque on accounta I am one smart shopper, eh? I knew the 'real good stuff' would be on the go before me 30 days were up. Got 2.5# of 'em. Got me a cabbage at 25% off through my weekly Air Miles offers. Got me a big bag of Russet spuds from the Saint John River Valley... mmmm-good. Got me an 8# Olymel smoked pork picnic shoulder for $1.49 a pound at the Real Atlantic Stupidstore. I have carrots from "The Valley" in NS in stock.

Tomorrow, I shall decree... LET'S GET FAT! Well, more fat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Apr 17 - 12:03 PM

It goes beyond waxing. It can substitute for nails on blackboard or the good ol water board or a panacea for the bored to get up and do something they normally abhorred.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Apr 17 - 11:42 AM

When you wax poetic does this double as a good way to remove hair?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Apr 17 - 11:30 AM

King Solomon's treasure
does not compare to
the amassed immortal treasure
of knowledge purchased by
the precious time
Rap spent in the library


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Apr 17 - 10:03 AM

SONNET λ

When, in disgrace with fortune and men's eyes,
I all alone beweep my outcast state,
And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries,
And look upon myself, and curse my fate,
Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featur'd like him, like him with friends possess'd,
Desiring this man's art and that man's scope,
With what I most enjoy contented least;
Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising,
Haply I think on MOAB, and then my state,
Like to the lark at break of day arising
From sullen earth, sings hymns at heaven's gate;
For thy sweet BS remember'd such wealth brings
That then I scorn to change my state with kings.

          --Bill Trudgecudgel, "Sonnet λ," The Collected Sonnets and Stuff. Stratfort-Nearby-Avonlady Job Printing, 1588.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 27 Apr 17 - 02:31 PM

Santiago El Grande. When I would go to the Beaverbrook Art Gallery in Fredericton, NB, I would always begin by sitting on the bench in the atrium and admiring/studying this painting by Sal. It's huge. It dwarfs mere mortals in more ways than one.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/new-brunswick/salvador-dali-other-paintings-return-to-beaverbrook-gallery-1.3045297

Beautiful gallery... hours and hours.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Apr 17 - 01:17 PM

I try to do it on a Dali basis. And, because of the persistence of memory, I try not to repeat myself. There is a manifest mystique about it, something that even a ride in a rainy taxi can't quite dispel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 27 Apr 17 - 12:34 PM

Your Imperial Rapturousness,
that is the perfect cue
for Salvador Dali and his waxed moustache.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Apr 17 - 09:06 AM

My Life Mission, my Life Goal, is to make every day a little more surreal for everyone.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Apr 17 - 09:28 PM

Without Bullshit Rap, what will all the PhD dissertations be about?

As it is, 20% are plagiarized anyway.





I miss my dog.


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