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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 13 Aug 08 - 12:48 AM
Rapparee 13 Aug 08 - 09:14 AM
Amos 13 Aug 08 - 10:05 AM
Amos 13 Aug 08 - 12:35 PM
Charley Noble 13 Aug 08 - 12:40 PM
Little Hawk 13 Aug 08 - 01:54 PM
Donuel 13 Aug 08 - 05:39 PM
Donuel 13 Aug 08 - 05:47 PM
Rapparee 13 Aug 08 - 05:50 PM
Amos 13 Aug 08 - 09:12 PM
Rapparee 13 Aug 08 - 09:24 PM
Acme 14 Aug 08 - 01:22 AM
Rapparee 14 Aug 08 - 09:02 AM
Amos 14 Aug 08 - 11:41 AM
Rapparee 14 Aug 08 - 12:47 PM
Amos 14 Aug 08 - 01:27 PM
Rapparee 14 Aug 08 - 05:04 PM
Acme 14 Aug 08 - 05:30 PM
Rapparee 14 Aug 08 - 05:55 PM
Amos 14 Aug 08 - 06:32 PM
Donuel 14 Aug 08 - 07:48 PM
Acme 14 Aug 08 - 08:41 PM
Rapparee 14 Aug 08 - 10:04 PM
Rapparee 15 Aug 08 - 09:00 AM
Acme 15 Aug 08 - 10:04 AM
Amos 15 Aug 08 - 10:25 AM
Amos 15 Aug 08 - 10:36 AM
Acme 15 Aug 08 - 10:44 AM
Amos 15 Aug 08 - 10:56 AM
MMario 15 Aug 08 - 11:31 AM
Rapparee 15 Aug 08 - 12:04 PM
Little Hawk 15 Aug 08 - 12:36 PM
Rapparee 15 Aug 08 - 01:02 PM
Amos 15 Aug 08 - 01:21 PM
Amos 15 Aug 08 - 04:51 PM
Rapparee 15 Aug 08 - 08:56 PM
Little Hawk 15 Aug 08 - 08:57 PM
Donuel 15 Aug 08 - 09:10 PM
Donuel 15 Aug 08 - 09:12 PM
Rapparee 15 Aug 08 - 09:16 PM
Amos 15 Aug 08 - 10:42 PM
Rapparee 16 Aug 08 - 11:07 AM
Acme 16 Aug 08 - 12:13 PM
Little Hawk 16 Aug 08 - 12:34 PM
Amos 16 Aug 08 - 12:48 PM
Little Hawk 16 Aug 08 - 01:30 PM
Little Hawk 16 Aug 08 - 04:09 PM
Rapparee 16 Aug 08 - 06:06 PM
Acme 16 Aug 08 - 06:35 PM
Little Hawk 16 Aug 08 - 06:56 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 12:48 AM

Dachshunds can properly sniff a crotch! You just have to get down on their level first, that's all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 09:14 AM

Or you can buy them stilts. Or one of those high-seat unicycles. Or scaffolding with a little ramp for them to run up. Or some built-up shoes.

Geez, LH, don't you like dachshunds? If you did you wouldn't deprive them of the pleasure of crotch-sniffing. In fact, you should try it and then you'll understand.

If you do, let me know the results.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 10:05 AM

And have someone take pictures, please...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 12:35 PM

The day some low-life dropped a video on You-Tube of Little Hawk practicing his crotch-sniffing techniques, everything went to hell. His dogs refused to have anything to do with him for violating their ancient rites and procedures; his girlfriend wanted to know who the hussy was he had found to practice on; his lawyer called to say an e-letter had been received from the DA. All in all, he wished he'd never dreamed up the idea of competing in crotch-sniffing. Besides, his knee-caps were all rugburned. Ah, he shoulda stood in bed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Charley Noble
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 12:40 PM

I believe that the posts in this thread are rising to new heights, while the thoughts are sinking deeper and deeper.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 01:54 PM

LOL! You amaze me sometimes, Amos. You should be working for one of those grocery store periodicals. You would impart a new aura of erudite sophistication to their articles, and it is sorely needed, I think.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 05:39 PM

Hey don't forget Ivans targeted the editor of the National Enauirer with Anthrax. He suffered for his craft.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 05:47 PM

Whooo I"M BACK from a cool ride on the way forward machine.

I met with the heiress to the Exon Mobile fortune in the year 2098.
Basicly her home is one of the few places on Earth that are still survivable. The gorgeous mountain bunker had natural light via fiber optics and required little air conditioning while the iar temp in Wyoming was a cool 156 F.

She showed me the disinformation campaign her grandfather had succesfully peddled at the turn of the century which led to the great warming of 2050 when the dimming factor subsided and added a quick 5 degree global warming.

To say she was grotesque by todays standards is polite but among her peers she was fairly attractive. Now I have what they call a heat wart. The increase in temperatures have hatched some new/old viri from the once frozen tundra of Siberia.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 05:50 PM

Is a frozen tundra like a frozen daquiri?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 09:12 PM

They only seem similar to those whose minds are in a whirl.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Aug 08 - 09:24 PM

Well, if anyone's mind is in a whirl mine is. It's got more spin right now than a politician's press release.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:22 AM

It's the diametrical opposite of a Baked Alaska.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 09:02 AM

The year I attended the Lord Mayor's St. Patrick's Day Banquet in Dublin they piped in the baked alaska.

The Lord Mayor's wolfhound was also brought in by the hound's handler and the poor little doggie was so hungry it sucked down a whole liter-sized pitcher of cream someone had carelessly left within range. Poor little pup, it must have been still growing and if it was it must now be about 200 feet at the shoulder.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 11:41 AM

I didn't know the baked Alaska Pipeline had been routed through Dublin!! Most unusual. I suppose it has somethign to do with the proclivity of the Irish for getting well-oiled.

I have a proposition for debate here on MOAB, as nowhere else would it have any comprehensible context.

Resolved: Energy is Bullshit.


Discuss.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 12:47 PM

The reverse would then also be true, just as mass can be turned into energy and energy into mass. And if bullshit=energy and vicey-versy, then QED: bullshit=mass and mass=bullshit.

I'm too tired to publish the revision of Einstein's equations necessary to demonstrate this mathematically.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 01:27 PM

I dunno. If apparent time is unidirectional, than t1=>t2 cannot equal t2=>t1; and it is perfectly conceivable that "energy=bullshit" is similarly irreversible, and should be written E=> B. Oversimplified, it would translate as "if energy, then BS", or more accurately "the existence of energy in any part of a continuum implies the necessary existencer of BS in that continuum."



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 05:04 PM

But then you violate e=mc^2, don't you? After all, if e=mc^2, then m=e/c^2 or, to put it another way, if e=bs, then bs=mc^2.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 05:30 PM

Let's take the topic back to ice cream. Much easier to discuss. What is your favorite form or flavor?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 05:55 PM

Ice cream has mass, mass is another form of energy, energy is bullshit, therefor ice cream is bullshit (according to Amos).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 06:32 PM

Rapaire, you're butting bullshit in my mouth. Try ice cream.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 07:48 PM

The National Enquirer broke the drug addiction story of Rush Limbaugh and his Ocycontin ring.


e= mc2   so with algebra we can isolate C2 by dividing both sides...
e/c2= M
now we do the same for mass...

e/c2
_____ = 0

M


WHOA I JUST ANNIHILATED THE UNIVERSE !!!!

quick how do I fix it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 08:41 PM

I don't know, but now I have ice cream on the brain. I had better to make a run to the store to put ice cream on the palate instead.

I'll do a couple of other errands while I'm out there, to make the gas go farther. I'll get some of that vanilla with chocolate and peanut butter cups, okay?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Aug 08 - 10:04 PM

Thanks, I just had a vanilla/caramel Drumstick.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 09:00 AM

Poor Mom. Everyone went out for ice cream and didn't bring you any.

Here's a big, big bowl of Moose Tracks. I poured caramel all over it, just as you like it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 10:04 AM

That's it, Moose Tracks! Chocolate (not vanilla) with all of the stuff in it. Mmmmm!

It's fattening.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 10:25 AM

DOnuel:

Meditate on the difference between division and subtraction. M/M=1, and M-M=0.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 10:36 AM

'Splain Moose Tracks????


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 10:44 AM

Chocolate ice cream with chunks of chocolate and peanut butter cups all mixed in.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 10:56 AM

Huh!!! Sounds fattening, all right. Imagining what it must look like, I wonder it isn't called Moose Droppings.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 11:31 AM

Moose droppings has raisens as well.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 12:04 PM

It originally was called Moose Poop, but the folks who market it don't think the original name would make it a big seller.

Actually it contains fudge, not chocolate chips.

You can learn more at www.moosetracks.com.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 12:36 PM

Hey! I just spotted a Midwestern Jadrool in my garden. What a frikkin' UGLY bird. Yech.

Alert the Audobon Society at once.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 01:02 PM

I replied on your other thread.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 01:21 PM

What--the Audobon SOciety intervenes in cases of excessive UGLINESS? I swan!!! I never knew they were such controlling characters.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 04:51 PM

THAT, by the effin' way, was TWENTY-FOUR-EIGHT-EIGHY-EIGHT. How ya like them apples?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 08:56 PM

What number is "eighy-eight"? Or have you dropped your tea into San Diego Harbor in some sort of protest?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 08:57 PM

That's sort of how Olive Whatnoll says it.


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Subject: OBIT Mrs. Fields
From: Donuel
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 09:10 PM

Mrs. Fields filed for cahpter 11 today.
RIP


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 09:12 PM

50ft inflatable dog turd downs power lines.
http://newsblaze.com/story/20080812135009reye.nb/topstory.html


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 09:16 PM

Which brings us to a discussion of the compressibility of bullshit. Since everything attracts everything else, can bullshit be compressed to the point it becomes, so to speak, a brown hole? Will the Big Sucking Sound be all matter being sucked into a brown hole? And will the "Big Bang" that results be, in actuality, the "Big Grunt"?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Aug 08 - 10:42 PM

BS is anti-entropic, silly. That's why Gluon hangs around here--he wants to command the quarks into line, like he does with all the others, but in the BS family even the hadrons don't give him no respeck.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 11:07 AM

You're saying...that BS...violates the Law of Entropy???? That means that it either becomes less random over time OR that it's already as randomized as possible. And in order for it be achieve the first option it must then start as the second, and when it achieves the first it becomes the second!

Therefore, total randomization is totally non-random.

I think I've proved the existence of God or something, but I'm not sure what.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 12:13 PM

Therefore, total randomization is totally non-random.

24897

Nothing random about that! And in 103, the unrandom MOAB will hit 25K.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 12:34 PM

Meanwhile further evidence is being collected to bring against the Gang of Three in the People's Court...evidence that will prove egregious waste of bandwidth and gross offences to the sensibilities of those who toil in the fields.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 12:48 PM

Which three? Shatner, Gluon, and Shane? Those dirty running dogs, ducks or figments!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 01:30 PM

The notorious Gang of Three, assisted by their lesser known confederate, MMario, have attempted to hijack a vast area of Mudcat bandwidth, but the people are not fooled. These miscreants will be forced to recant before the entire People's Assembly and mend their counterrevolutionary ways once and for all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 04:09 PM

By the way, I just got the 24,900th post.

Eat your heart out, Amos. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 06:06 PM

How very nice for you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 06:35 PM

Little Hawk, do us a favor please. To keep this orderly, will you read through the entire thread and tell us who has first dibs on the 25,000th post? Thanks!

We don't want any blood spilled.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Aug 08 - 06:56 PM

Yeah. Oh, I've been dying to do just that, Stilly. ;-)


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