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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 12 Apr 09 - 09:28 PM
Amos 12 Apr 09 - 11:00 PM
Amos 13 Apr 09 - 10:03 AM
Rapparee 13 Apr 09 - 03:04 PM
Janie 13 Apr 09 - 09:53 PM
Acme 13 Apr 09 - 09:57 PM
Rapparee 13 Apr 09 - 10:28 PM
Amos 13 Apr 09 - 10:29 PM
Janie 13 Apr 09 - 10:31 PM
Rapparee 13 Apr 09 - 10:32 PM
Rapparee 13 Apr 09 - 10:34 PM
Amos 13 Apr 09 - 10:37 PM
Rapparee 13 Apr 09 - 10:45 PM
Janie 13 Apr 09 - 11:09 PM
Rapparee 13 Apr 09 - 11:15 PM
Acme 13 Apr 09 - 11:37 PM
Amos 14 Apr 09 - 10:33 AM
MMario 14 Apr 09 - 10:38 AM
Rapparee 14 Apr 09 - 12:22 PM
MMario 14 Apr 09 - 12:27 PM
Amos 14 Apr 09 - 12:53 PM
Rapparee 14 Apr 09 - 01:05 PM
Amos 14 Apr 09 - 02:22 PM
Acme 14 Apr 09 - 05:29 PM
Rapparee 14 Apr 09 - 05:38 PM
Amos 14 Apr 09 - 05:56 PM
Rapparee 14 Apr 09 - 06:37 PM
Amos 14 Apr 09 - 06:46 PM
Janie 14 Apr 09 - 08:48 PM
Rapparee 14 Apr 09 - 09:32 PM
Janie 14 Apr 09 - 09:43 PM
Rapparee 14 Apr 09 - 09:54 PM
Janie 14 Apr 09 - 10:38 PM
Janie 14 Apr 09 - 10:58 PM
Amos 14 Apr 09 - 11:28 PM
Acme 14 Apr 09 - 11:57 PM
Amos 15 Apr 09 - 09:10 AM
Rapparee 15 Apr 09 - 09:37 AM
Amos 15 Apr 09 - 10:33 AM
Acme 15 Apr 09 - 10:41 AM
Rapparee 15 Apr 09 - 12:42 PM
GUEST,donuel 15 Apr 09 - 01:45 PM
Amos 15 Apr 09 - 02:25 PM
Amos 15 Apr 09 - 02:35 PM
Rapparee 15 Apr 09 - 05:25 PM
Acme 15 Apr 09 - 05:57 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 15 Apr 09 - 07:38 PM
Amos 15 Apr 09 - 07:55 PM
Peace 15 Apr 09 - 08:06 PM
Janie 15 Apr 09 - 08:15 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Apr 09 - 09:28 PM

Read? How do you do that?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Apr 09 - 11:00 PM

Janie,

That sounds like a memorable and stirring voyage of discovery.

Well done!!!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:03 AM

I am particularly proud of the officer (unidentified) who gave the order to act when the moment arose to take out the pirates who were holding that American captain at gunpoint. It was a dicey call, one that a lot of people would have feared to make, but having boldly made it, he deserves the reward of his success.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 03:04 PM

He had clearance to do what needed to be done and he did it. Leadership from many areas.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 09:53 PM

One of youse get over here and help me figure out how to do my taxes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 09:57 PM

I've already done that Janie, and the refund is long-since spent.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:28 PM

Ours in the the bank, and we await the State. Then will come your stimulus payment, $400 if you're employed and $250 if you're on SS or a veteran's pension or something -- so I'm getting disabled vet pay from the VA AND I'm employed, so do I get $650??

Nah, probably not. Better so. I'd just spend it foolishly on things like food, shelter, and clothing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:29 PM

Long done and the money into the bank or spent.

Janie, just add all of Column A and subtract one from COlumn B or two from Column C.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:31 PM

Ach! I haven't done my own taxes in well over 20 years, but accountant fees have simply gotten too steep to bear. Trying to use turbo tax, but don't understand the questions related to the PLLC and private practice. I finally surrendered and have just finished filling out the extension requests. I'm crossing my fingers that I am sending in enough to cover any taxes owed.

Wonder who does Chongo's taxes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:32 PM

Oh, yeah. The jet-propelled toilet broke last night. Because it's HIGH TECH and shoots the shit off with a blast of air and little water parts were not in stock. In fact, the innards need a rebuild.

We are thinking of just replacing it with an old fashioned, down the hole it goes, model. Something that won't sound like a rocket when you use the handle. Gotta be something like that around. After all, if we can build a toilet in space....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:34 PM

Janie, we send out taxes off to a company in Cincinnati. Costs $350 or so, but a) we get that back tenfold each year and b) we don't fight about how to do taxes any more.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:37 PM

Have you forgotten how to dig a deep hole and cover it with a two-seater, yonker??


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 10:45 PM

A hole? Man, I can dig it! I dig holes, ya know? Holes are, like, deep. Problem is, the last time I was groovin' on a hole somebody said something about getting spayed or something, so I left. I mean, like, I dig 'em all: little holes, big holes, nail holes, worm holes, fox holes, even like, you know, trenches and foundations and shit like that. Even big damn craters, like on the Moon, ya know? And caves. And tunnels. And mines, but not the kind that blow up when you step on 'em, but the other kind like you get gold from.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 11:09 PM

I've got a low tech but very functional low-flow toilet that does what it is supposed to do, except that I do have to hit it with comet and a brush several times a week. But it don't clog.

Them two seater holes don't clog either. They just fill up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 11:15 PM

The county health worker tried one more time to get the old farmer to put screens on his house. "Look," she said, "do it for your kids. Screens will keep the flies off your food."

"Nah," he replied. "Just use some lime in the outhouse and things'll be fine. Them screens are too damned expensive."

Couple weeks later she happened to be driving by and saw that the house was resplendent with new screens on every window, the front porch was screened in -- it was a showplace for window screens.

Dazed, she pulled in and asked the farmer what had changed his mind.

"Well," he said sheepishly, "it was them white footprints the flies were leaving on my food."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Apr 09 - 11:37 PM

Janie, having an accountant do it for a year or two after the divorce might be a good idea. It takes a little while to unwind the taxes from the ex. I always did our taxes, but with the death of my father and his estate getting tangled with mine and then a divorce, I needed help (I was listed as heir on a bank account and the bank wouldn't issue two statements, one up to the date of his death, and one at the end of the year. It made it difficult to pay Dad's taxes).

I hate those TurboTax programs and their ilk. They're stubborn, possibly even stupid. You figure out the gist of it before you start, then it makes you re-answer all sorts of questions but it won't ask all of the questions it needs to, or use the forms you need the way you need to. This year I used the eFile software that is just forms, no fussy questions.

You can deduct this year's tax preparation costs when you do next year's taxes. If that will help.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 10:33 AM

What is this thing we have for numbers, that we hire Number Priests to weave our spells for us? Have two-column pad, will travel!!

Everything counted, measured, added, folded, spindled and mutilated.

If no two dollars are alike--as they cannot be, born in different instants and locations of different threads and molecules--how do we get away wtih adding them up at all, as though they were completely fungible like water molecules? And if this premise is improper in some deep spiritual sense, adding layers of lfalsehood to our worldview, then how can we honor the IRS?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 10:38 AM

Does anyone actually honour the IRS? or if they do, isn't more in the lapse then in the doing?

I see it more as a bribe to keep them from causing harm.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 12:22 PM

So we elect people to office, pay them a good salary and give them good benefits, and then we bribe them to do what we elected them to do in the first place?

Let's just jail them all for bribery and corruption!

Hmmm...a hangman's knot is tied on a double bite....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 12:27 PM

I don't think anyone is elected to the IRS.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 12:53 PM

Who would run?



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 01:05 PM

So they just band together, like pirates? Do you have to have a wooden leg and a parrot?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 02:22 PM

Excelling in things mathematical,
And after his post-grad sabbatical,
My son, I confess
Joined the wild IRS
Enjoying their manners piratical.

Ogden Olds


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 05:29 PM

Hey, MOM, put on your good schmata and come on over to the faculty reception this afternoon! We're getting ready to wine and dine our faculty and staff authors for books and creative works from 2007-2008.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 05:38 PM

I've been having whine all day....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 05:56 PM

Fulsome; sanctimonious; bombastic; wheedling; unctuous; cloying and coarse; mealy-mouthed, smarmy, sycophantic and vaguely oleaginous. Fawning, glib, magniloquent foppery,

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 06:37 PM

Oh, good-o! You found your thesaurus!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 06:46 PM

Well, it was on my iPhone all along...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 08:48 PM

Amos, Amos...I fear your mind is starting to go. You failed to note the palindromic nature of your last post.

Or maybe your priorities have become skewed and you know longer recognize what is important.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 09:32 PM

I think it's the latter. I think he's gotten all skewed up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 09:43 PM

Well, we already knew that....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 09:54 PM

He needs a new concept. Maybe a Phillips skew driver or something. Or maybe Phillips Milk of Magnesia. Yeah, that'd straighten him out. A whole bottle of Milk of Magnesia. You can't stay skewed up after that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 10:38 PM

Just watched a documentary available on Hulu about, among other things, the Inuits. A man passed along a favorite saying of his grandfather regarding hunting.

"The patient man survives."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 10:58 PM

Another interesting tidbit regarding caribou (at least in the Labrador region.) Apparently there are significant natural fluctuations in the size of the caribou herd. I'm not sure when the documentary was filmed - probably in the 1990's (I should have watched the credits.) At that time the caribou population was very high, with half a million calves born yearly, of which approximately 1/4 survive their first winter. The either the man's grandfather or father, (not sure which he was referring to), both of whom lived very traditional Inuit lives as subsistence hunters, never laid eyes on a caribou, never laid eyes on a caribou until that person was late middle age. Presumably the population of caribou was in a significant down turn and/or migration patterns had changed.

Doing a very tiny amount of research just now, there appears to be concern that woodland caribou populations are in significant decline in Canada and Alaska, but other populations are doing OK.

In case yer interested....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 11:28 PM

Bill Moyers gets to the bottom of the financial collapse.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Apr 09 - 11:57 PM

Tonight we had a great turnout at our reception. Probably such a great turnout that, had the fire marshall turned up, he'd have turned a few away, despite our concrete building.

Janie, I think the program you watched was produced several years ago for PBS. I'm pretty sure I saw it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 09:10 AM

I see skies of gray, and eyes of pink,
Fags and scabs and an occasional fink,
And I say to myself
What a wonderful world.

I see trees of purple, grass of yellow,
Rivers of mead, and bowls of JEllo
ANd I say to myself,
What a wonderful world. I wish Peggy Gordon were here.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 09:37 AM

MOM! Amos is doing acid again and he's not sharing!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 10:33 AM

According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, a librarian is a person who specializes "in the care or management of a library." That definition is far too mechanical. It leaves out the larger role librarians play in our democracy, facilitating access to information and ideas and promoting and protecting a precious First Amendment right: the freedom to read. ..."We do this by making sure libraries have information and ideas across the spectrum of social and political thought, so people can choose what they want to read or view or listen to. Some users find materials in their local library collection to be untrue, offensive, harmful or even dangerous. But libraries serve the information needs of all of the people in the community ? not just the loudest, not just the most powerful, not even just the majority. Libraries serve everyone."

NYT on Judith Krug

For Rapaire, who is a Master Librarian


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 10:41 AM

The washer gets fixed this afternoon. Thank goodness--the pile of dirty laundry around here is astonishingly huge!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 12:42 PM

Bigger than the one at my house just before Pat comes home?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,donuel
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 01:45 PM

Its unbelivevable. Its like a dream.
Its the truth

On this side of the "non - dark universe" there is spooky action at a distance and causation being changed by merely observing/dreaming it.



Amos, Contrary to the commonly held assumption, the galactic overlards did not stop their search for truth or the "other".
The galactic overlards grew fat and indolent in their search for the otherness in hope to satisfy thier cosmic lust. When a portal to a younger thinner dimension became stable they all left.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 02:25 PM

Well, that opens some interesting doors!! A portal to a skinny universe? Fractal-based quantum-foam portal weight-loss programs? Jenny Craig Wormholes? Step through to a new and thinner you!! Just don't plan on getting back home any time soon. We haven't figgered that bit out yet.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 02:35 PM

IT would be wunnerful to invent a lens like those used by snipers to see via infrared, but which would respond to dark matter.   The spatiality of the world would probably seem very different, and there's no telling what passages would appear, and to where.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 05:25 PM

Interesting stuff.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 05:57 PM

28600


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 07:38 PM

And ONE!!!!!!!!!

Flip youse all!

- Shane


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 07:55 PM

I think Little Hawk;'s determination to take back his Life is weakening. Mwahahahaha.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Peace
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 08:06 PM

This is post 28603.

28603 is a prime number.

Strange, huh?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 15 Apr 09 - 08:15 PM

Not to the garlic overlards. Not strange at all to them.


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