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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 07 Aug 07 - 10:46 PM
Janie 07 Aug 07 - 09:45 PM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 08:24 PM
Rapparee 07 Aug 07 - 08:05 PM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 07:38 PM
Little Hawk 07 Aug 07 - 05:50 PM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 05:37 PM
Little Hawk 07 Aug 07 - 05:08 PM
Acme 07 Aug 07 - 04:15 PM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 04:02 PM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 03:37 PM
Little Hawk 07 Aug 07 - 12:50 PM
MMario 07 Aug 07 - 12:20 PM
JennyO 07 Aug 07 - 12:16 PM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 10:59 AM
JennyO 07 Aug 07 - 10:53 AM
Acme 07 Aug 07 - 10:49 AM
Rapparee 07 Aug 07 - 10:44 AM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 10:41 AM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 02:17 AM
Acme 07 Aug 07 - 01:14 AM
Rapparee 07 Aug 07 - 12:23 AM
Amos 07 Aug 07 - 12:05 AM
JennyO 06 Aug 07 - 11:46 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 11:41 PM
Little Hawk 06 Aug 07 - 11:21 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 11:09 PM
Little Hawk 06 Aug 07 - 10:25 PM
rumanci 06 Aug 07 - 09:27 PM
Janie 06 Aug 07 - 09:16 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 08:50 PM
Janie 06 Aug 07 - 07:55 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 06:45 PM
Little Hawk 06 Aug 07 - 06:05 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 04:13 PM
Little Hawk 06 Aug 07 - 04:10 PM
Acme 06 Aug 07 - 04:04 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 04:03 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 06 Aug 07 - 04:03 PM
Little Hawk 06 Aug 07 - 04:02 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 03:52 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 06 Aug 07 - 03:44 PM
Little Hawk 06 Aug 07 - 03:26 PM
MMario 06 Aug 07 - 03:25 PM
Little Hawk 06 Aug 07 - 03:15 PM
Amos 06 Aug 07 - 03:02 PM
JennyO 06 Aug 07 - 07:26 AM
Acme 06 Aug 07 - 12:21 AM
Rapparee 05 Aug 07 - 11:03 PM
Amos 05 Aug 07 - 09:49 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 10:46 PM

Oh, great. See what you've done now? Riled the wimmin folk. Great. Just great. Now we won't have Mom!! She's gone off into the Outback!! Curse you, Little Hawk!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 09:45 PM

"Hey, look at the blimp!" she exclaimed, pointing at the sky behind them.

The men turned as one, their eyes following the line of her finger. In the brief second it took for them to realize they had been fooled, the women darted in, grabbed Mom, and ran. Under the cover of the men's loud declaiming and chest thumping, Jenny O had quietly brought the horses up and had been holding them, obscured from general notice, in a copse of trees about 20 yards from the field of dishonor. She broke from the trees, leading the other horses behind her. Her cohorts scrambled quickly onto their mounts and tore away. SRS had to delay. She was holding Mom. Jenny deftly leaned down as she rode past and swept Mom onto the saddle behind her. SRS took off running again. With a wild whoop and a great leap, she sprang over the hindquarters of her steed, and raced away after the others. They were headed for the Outback.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 08:24 PM

Oh stop your nonsense, good Rapaire. It is more than I can bear to have TWO of you go completely around the bend at once.

Little Hawk has become a rude beast, slouching toward Bethlehem to be re-assembled, and you are acting like a hant with more of his attention on the far side than the near one. This is a ridiculous universe, no mistake.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 08:05 PM

How odd it is that the ghosts of both Amos and Little Hawk still post. They must have loved Mom a lot, but I suspect that they will eventually be exorcised.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 07:38 PM

I did mean odoriferous--meaning, morally offensive; as in, "odoriferous legislation". Your delusory world-view was not up to extrapolating that fairly obvious meaning, but perhaps I should not have committed the typo. I know you are in a delicate frame of mind, having jsut been reassembled from small parts. Sigh. Never mind. When the healing process is over, I am sure you will be much more rational.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 05:50 PM

The word is "odoriferous", you simpleton. And did you know this?   It means "diffusing an odor, either pleasant or obnoxious".

Since you obviously meant the former (pleasant), I suppose I should thank you for the compliment, although I have to say that I find it rather odd that you would take such an interest in another man's skivvies...you being happily married and all...

Does your wife know about your pecadillos in this regard?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 05:37 PM

Mwahahahaha. What pretense!! What folderolity. Bloviate is a perfectly fine word, the more so because it describes you to a T, M. Hack.

As for paying you for appearing here, I think not. I would remind you that it is only through goodwill that your status here as existing whatsoever was recently restored. You should pay Mom for the privilege of occasionally appearing under her overly-lenient roof. Pray, do not bore me with your fancied fraudulent justifications any longer. They are not the class of BS we seek in these parts.

I spit ice cubes and seeds in your general direction. And slip an ice cube into your odiferous underpants.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 05:08 PM

More bloated verbosity from the supposedly outraged one! Good gracious. My dear fellow, anyone who uses the term "bloviate" in common discourse nowadays is clearly suffering from an ailment that I would characterize as terminal pomposity of the piehole. "Bloviate" indeed! No one bloviates anymore in this society. People bloviated in the Victorian era, Amos, but bloviation has had its day.

You need to descend from the exquisitely remote ivory tower of pretence and intellectual artifice you have constructed for yourself, shake yourself off like a hounddog after a refreshing dip in the river, and join the rest of us down here on planet Earth.

I stand by my original statement. I am proud of it. I would say it again if asked to. It was a red flag waved in the breeze in hopes of stimulating a shocked snort of surprise from the wandering MOAB bull, and it succeeded splendidly. Mission accomplished.

By the way, if you wish me to continue responding in a timely fashion to each and every ONE of your ramblings on this thread, I shall expect a weekly stipend (say $150) to be deposited directly into my Paypal account. Otherwise I shall only respond when I feel like it. My time is valuable, you know... ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 04:15 PM

You each need to get a glass of that lemonade and go sit in the swing under the shade tree and listen to the bugs and the birds and throw ice cubes at each other.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 04:02 PM

Just to make the record clear, the sordid calumny for whcih Little Hawk was so recently vaporized and emulsified is the following remark on the innate character of our Mom:

As for the MOAB, forget it. No one is insane enough to try and analyze that. It has become a tiny club for the terminally verbose and Shatnerless types who lurk at the fringes of society, desperately hoping against hope that something they say or do actually matters.

The reason this was grounds for a challenge is it is false slander against all of our natures. If I hoped for a minute to make something I say "really matter", Little Hawk, are you really deluded enough to think I would put it on the MOAB?

This story shall the good man teach his son;
    And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
    From this day to the ending of the world,
    But we in it shall be remember'd;
    We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
    For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
    Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
    This day shall gentle his condition:
    And gentlemen in England now a-bed
    Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,
    And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
    That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.


So hold thine own, Monsieur Hack, and find some use therefore better than such craven sprinkles.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 03:37 PM

Oh, bloviate away, Leedle Hack, your smoke screen will never be thick enough to obscure the truth. You insulted Mom and all who abide with her. Then you show up and insist you were just kidding. For fie. Puff away, cover your scrawny butt as you will, but I assure you all would be put much more right by a simple admission and apology.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 12:50 PM

Pfui! Amos chose, instead of utilizing the grand opportunities here for the sort of wit and ridiculosity that the situation clearly called for, to get all huffy and affronted....like a maiden aunt who has just detected a lapse of teatime etiquette on the part of a younger relative. He rushes to the defense of a thread which from its inception has been based on bizarre humour and utter nonsense, and acts as if he were defending the dignity and sanctity of some hallowed institution. He objects strenuously to my trolling for a response on the sacred ground of the Mother of All BS (ahem...bullshit) Threads.........

How absurd. Has the man lost his sense of proportion altogether? Has he been consuming too many pickled anchovies? Something is seriously wrong here.

If he were living in Schenectady....if he was a Schenectadonian or whatever the hell they call themselves....I could understand it. But he's living in California. Californians are supposed to be broadminded and flexible.

Or is all his huffing and puffing merely feigned outrage? I suspect that is the case. It's just a big act. Well, I am not impressed. And I am fully prepared to resume the duel at any time in order to put this pompous fellow in his proper place. Out of politeness, I will not state where that place is....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 12:20 PM

I think Amos may have meant "decimalization" - LH being temporaily Deweyed (possibly also Hueyed and Lueyed as well)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 12:16 PM

his temporary condition of complete decimation

So nine tenths of him was still here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 10:59 AM

Rapaire, this retroactive warping of historical fact is just silly. It's one thing for Big Brother to do it, but you are not Big Brother. The record clearly shows I have posted here continuously while LH lapsed. Why? Obviously, because of his temporary condition of complete decimation. You are being illogical.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 10:53 AM

Of course, one of the good things about being on the other side of the planet is that sometimes I can pick Mom up and put her on top with a nice cup of tea and some home made cakes while YOU guys are asleep. I was foiled this time because Mudcat went down just as I was about to post two hours ago, and now Amos has done the job for me. Oh well, the best laid plans......

And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with lemonade. It's just that some moments are "cup of tea" moments, and this is one of them - even more so now than two hours ago.

By the way, we have a very good imitation blunderbuss here that John made for his pirate show. It looks pretty convincing, but it's perfectly harmless - it shoots party poppers - all you get is a nice bang and a bunch of little streamers. Might have been just the thing for a virtual duel - if one had happened.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 10:49 AM

How is Alberta treating you? Have you stopped in every library you pass to see how the rest of the world does things (or to steal their good ideas?)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 10:44 AM

Amos passed away in a duel with Little Hawk, who also croaked. Neither paid any attention to the niceties and politesse of the Code Duello, and so all gentlefolk are better off without either of those boorish poltroons.

Funeral arrangements were made by a pack of dingoes, who dragged off the bodies and ate them.

Memorials can be sent to the "Let's All Help Rapaire Retire Wealthy Fund."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 10:41 AM

Fortunately, good Hawk has proven resilient. He is fully recovered, and has resumed the difficult duties of animating his various imaginary characters for our delectation and education.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 02:17 AM

What is it with this effort to spin time back to before an event, and re-order it!! Even drill sergeants don't get that luxury. Have some lemonade and write the obit, there's a good second.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 01:14 AM

Too late, Rapaire, you missed it. Go see Brucie and let us know how he's doing. Jenny, it isn't that you're on the bottom of the planet that was the problem, it is that you're on the other side of it (laterally, not horizontally).

Just as well Rap isn't checking in too often or he might have found an old bluderbuss to introduce into the field of dishonor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 12:23 AM

All RIGHT, goddamit! As the primaries neither Amos nor LH are to toss nasty words at each other. Chongo and I will establish the necessary details, and all the primaries have to do is show up.

Now you two address each other in civil ways. Chongo and I will discuss the details of how you are going to kill each other like the gentlemen we are.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 07 Aug 07 - 12:05 AM

Some folks are hard to satsfy. LH wa sleft strewn in bits across the battle field, food for scavengers. Janie and I drank to the victory in sparkling lemonade. End of tale. Rewriting history, of course, is a favorite pastime.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 11:46 PM

Good grief - a person goes to bed and indulges in a few hours of sleep, which is only right and proper for the time of day here in upside down land, and the whole battle is engaged (sorta), fought (in a sorta half-arsed kind of way) and fizzles to an ignominious end.

I was expecting more swaggering, swords at twenty paces and plenty of blood-letting. I am disappointed. The question is, does MOM feel sufficiently avenged?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 11:41 PM

Oh, I see. Yu were actually trolling. Well, well, well. I suppose you pee in the soup at home, too.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 11:21 PM

Give over, man. ;-) I was trolling with that remark I made about the MOAB on that other thread. I wanted to see if any alert eyes would pick it up, go for the bait, and raise a ruckus here about it.

Sure enough, they did! Heh! Worked like a charm...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 11:09 PM

Someday, my friend, your own responsibility will raise its ugly head, and this sort ofprojection on others will no longer be possible for you as an Owner of Truth. Then, such remarks as you have made about Mom, or myself for that matter, will never enter your emnlightened head.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 10:25 PM

What vainglorious blather on your part, Amos! Very well, I shall take pity on you. You too are pardoned. In the spirit of the great man, William Shatner, who always has had compassion on lesser men, I shall overlook all the misleading and scurrilous things you have said about me here. I shall disregard the outrageous impugning of my heretofore flawless reputation. I shall agree to an armistace.

Life goes on... ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: rumanci
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 09:27 PM

Janie.   Don't talk about Mom like THAT !    She'll bite back.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 09:16 PM

I...I suppose I could do that. You are quite sure it is safe? What about that deranged looking chimpanzee over there?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 08:50 PM

Ah, Janie, dinna fash thysel'. The battle is over. Those few pieces of Little Hawk you see hither and yon will be taken off quickly enough by those who need carrion to live. Come, they are serving lemonade in the First Lieutenant's mess, sit with us and enjoy the tales of wives and loved ones dreamed of at home....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 07:55 PM

Holy Crap! Here I am, finally showing up 4 years late, only to find myself in the middle of a battlefield.

MOM, GET ME OUT'A HEEREEEEEE!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 06:45 PM

Ah. So now, squirming red-faced and discovered red-handed, you shift the meanings of words so that "away" means "here, but too indifferent to the consequences of my actions to pay any attention"?

And, unable to stand up to your own mistakes, you get even more desperately critical of those who have called you on your sins?

Oh, fie, it is too low to discuss. Give it up, admit your errors and stand up to the future like a man, Leedle Hack. Go to, you are pardoned.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 06:05 PM

Oh really? I think you are just trying desperately to wiggle out of an encounter which could prove disastrous to your future, possibly precluding entirely your upcoming scheduled appearance on "Wanking For Dollars"...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 04:13 PM

I was away, Amos. I was engaged in business, yes, vitally important business! Ooooooo....I just bet you wish you knew what it was. But I'm not going to tell you. Ha! Ha! Ha!

So. You dare to issue a challenge against mois, do you?


Hmmmm....VEry away, indeed. That much is a given.

As for my challenge, sir, I was under the impression your were of sound mind. Your bluster reveals you are either of multiple personalities ("mois" as a plural) or have conceived yourself to be a month. Although you do not specify which month, one may assume it is February, the most irregular one.

So I am inclined, out of a sense of charity, to return your chattel, castle and lands to you on the basis that I misestimated your mental condition, and to forgive your defamatory and scandalous remarks about our Mom on the basis of temporary insanity.

This is a very good deal for you.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 04:10 PM

Don't be silly, Amos! Wait...that would be like asking a dog not to roll in shit, wouldn't it? That would be like asking George Bush not to say 'nukular' or asking Jerry Lewis to start being tasteful instead of disgusting. Never mind. Be silly. Knock yourself out.

Your obsessive-compulsive disorder is flaring up again, my good fellow. I merely said I was "away", didn't I? I never said I was away from the Mudcat Forum. No. I just said I was away.

I was away from this thread. My important business was on other threads.

I really should not have to explain these things to you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 04:04 PM

Mom! Finally got here! I don't know if all of the dueling chatter between Amos and Hawk has jammed the channels, but anyway, I'm here now. It's hot out--have some iced tea. And if you don't drink it, you'll have it handy to throw on one of the boys if they turn blue in the face during that duel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 04:03 PM

Lo, how the evidence reveals your duplicity:


7 Little Hawk   RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads   06-Aug-07 - 03:15 PM
8 Little Hawk   RE: Diane - Who DO you like?   06-Aug-07 - 01:55 PM
9 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Spy Network in U.S.   06-Aug-07 - 01:50 PM
10 Little Hawk   RE: BS: In every thread someone has to be last!   06-Aug-07 - 01:49 PM
11 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   06-Aug-07 - 01:47 PM
12 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Circumcision: pros and cons   06-Aug-07 - 09:52 AM
13 Little Hawk   RE: Diane - Who DO you like?   06-Aug-07 - 09:50 AM
14 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   06-Aug-07 - 09:43 AM
15 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Conflate THIS!!!   06-Aug-07 - 09:27 AM
16 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Circumcision: pros and cons   06-Aug-07 - 09:26 AM
17 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   06-Aug-07 - 12:58 AM
18 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Bridge Collapse over Mississippi River   06-Aug-07 - 12:13 AM
19 Little Hawk   RE: what phrases do you hate?   06-Aug-07 - 12:08 AM
20 Little Hawk   RE: BS: A Death Wish?   05-Aug-07 - 08:36 PM
21 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Circumcision: pros and cons   05-Aug-07 - 08:29 PM
22 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   05-Aug-07 - 08:15 PM
23 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   05-Aug-07 - 07:06 PM
24 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   05-Aug-07 - 06:53 PM
25 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Circumcision: pros and cons   05-Aug-07 - 06:43 PM
26 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   05-Aug-07 - 06:35 PM
27 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Circumcision: pros and cons   05-Aug-07 - 06:20 PM
28 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Circumcision: pros and cons   05-Aug-07 - 02:28 PM
29 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Spy Network in U.S.   05-Aug-07 - 02:16 PM
30 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   05-Aug-07 - 02:16 PM
31 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Conflate THIS!!!   05-Aug-07 - 01:48 PM
32 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Frequently asked questions   05-Aug-07 - 01:47 PM
33 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Frequently given answers   05-Aug-07 - 01:43 PM
34 Little Hawk   RE: BS: A Death Wish?   05-Aug-07 - 02:02 AM
35 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Conflate THIS!!!   05-Aug-07 - 01:56 AM
=====================================================
Date: 05 Aug 07 - 01:03 AM
Subject: RE: The life of a thread From: Amos -
==================================================
36 Little Hawk   RE: BS: And the next US President will be   04-Aug-07 - 11:40 PM
37 Little Hawk   RE: BS: Circumcision: pros and cons   04-Aug-07 - 11:37 PM


Perhaps your Mister Shatner will now come and beam you out of this most dishonorable embrassment.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 04:03 PM

Aw, Christ, they've started. This is gonna be ugly.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 04:02 PM

"I advise you not to squawk further, lest the true depths of your depravity be revealed."

Humph. You have no idea of the true depths of my depravity, Amos. Don't forget that I have had 58 years in which to plumb those depths and nurture them. I do not reveal them to just anyone. No indeed. Only a chosen few are selected.

William Shatner. Winona Ryder. Diana Rigg. Penelope Rutledge. People who have proven themselves worthy.

You, sir, are not in such august company, and I fear you never shall be.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 03:52 PM

Sigh. Excuses, excuses. Your dark-spirited defamation of noble Mom's character will not be so easily overlooked, Monsieur Hack, nor will your flimsy explanations of awayness -- which is a chronic state of mind with you -- be any reason to deviate from the well-established Rules of the ancient Code of Honor, with which I am sure you are deeply unfamiliar, as demonstrated by your efforts at dodging. It is to no avail.

I advise you not to squawk further, lest the true depths of your depravity be revealed.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 03:44 PM

You got a lotta nerve, MMario! Stop perpetuatin' these dumb insulting stereotypes about primates or I will hafta come down there and teach you a lesson.

So...the two chumps wanta have a duel, huh? Hysterical. This'll be like one of them fights at the Nerd School, I figger. A lotta sound and not much action. In one corner we got a joker who talks way too much and tries to impress people with big words all the time...in the other corner we got....fer gosh sakes! It's another joker of the same friggin' type.

I can hardly tell these two clowns apart without a program, but I know one of 'em is livin' in California and the other one is livin' in Ontario, Canada. That makes arrangin' this duel kinda expensive and impractical, if ya ask me. The travel costs will be high, and what's the payoff? Who wants to go 3,000 miles to watch two nerds face off?

Normally I would recommend guns for a duel. Tommy guns would be pretty good, but pistols would be better in my opinion. It takes more skill to shoot someone with a pistol.

But in this case...naw....it'd be a waste of ammunition. And you'd have to stand 'em only three feet apart so it wouldn't last all day.

Look, here's my idea fer Amos and Hawk. Try talkin' each other to death. That eliminates the travel costs and it saves money on bullets too.

If it don't work out, I will be glad to show up with the tommy gun and finish the job. But on my schedule, not yours. I got work to do.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 03:26 PM

Whatever. The weapons matter not to me. Amos, your goose is cooked.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 03:25 PM

*sigh*

chongo will probably want to go with traditional Chimp weapons ;

amos - are you really up for poo at 10 paces?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 03:15 PM

I was away, Amos. I was engaged in business, yes, vitally important business! Ooooooo....I just bet you wish you knew what it was. But I'm not going to tell you. Ha! Ha! Ha!

So. You dare to issue a challenge against mois, do you? You shall pay dearly for that foolish decision on your part.

I choose Chongo as my second, and I think I'll let him choose the weapons too. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 03:02 PM

Aha!! A challenge duly given, and through base shame and fear, not answered, is a challenge fairly won. I own M. Hack's castles, chattels and land as of this day, and his mistresses are all forfeit also, nor may he tread the honest ground of this domain again without permission.

Ha.

Shatner THAT!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 07:26 AM

I wonder if he HAS a second. He does not seem to be answering your challenge, Amos. I perceive that dawn is already past, and still no word.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Aug 07 - 12:21 AM

Frisbees at 100 paces.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Aug 07 - 11:03 PM

Oh, dear. He has he choice of weapons. I will contact him for you and will make the necessary arrangements with his second.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Aug 07 - 09:49 PM

Oh, what a poltroon!!


A


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