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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 02 Nov 05 - 03:38 PM
Amos 02 Nov 05 - 10:37 AM
Amos 02 Nov 05 - 10:12 AM
Rapparee 02 Nov 05 - 09:13 AM
Bunnahabhain 02 Nov 05 - 09:03 AM
Rapparee 02 Nov 05 - 08:57 AM
Bunnahabhain 02 Nov 05 - 08:52 AM
Amos 02 Nov 05 - 05:28 AM
Acme 01 Nov 05 - 11:22 PM
Amos 01 Nov 05 - 10:59 PM
Rapparee 01 Nov 05 - 10:43 PM
Rapparee 01 Nov 05 - 03:40 PM
Little Hawk 01 Nov 05 - 12:48 PM
MMario 01 Nov 05 - 12:46 PM
Acme 01 Nov 05 - 12:19 PM
Amos 01 Nov 05 - 12:18 PM
MMario 01 Nov 05 - 11:49 AM
Bunnahabhain 01 Nov 05 - 11:47 AM
Rapparee 01 Nov 05 - 11:41 AM
Acme 01 Nov 05 - 10:31 AM
Amos 01 Nov 05 - 09:00 AM
Rapparee 01 Nov 05 - 08:53 AM
MMario 01 Nov 05 - 08:42 AM
Acme 01 Nov 05 - 12:07 AM
Amos 31 Oct 05 - 11:17 PM
Acme 31 Oct 05 - 09:32 PM
Amos 31 Oct 05 - 08:49 PM
Rapparee 31 Oct 05 - 04:10 PM
MMario 31 Oct 05 - 03:39 PM
Rapparee 31 Oct 05 - 03:30 PM
Amos 31 Oct 05 - 01:59 PM
Acme 31 Oct 05 - 12:42 PM
Rapparee 31 Oct 05 - 12:34 PM
Amos 31 Oct 05 - 12:06 PM
Rapparee 31 Oct 05 - 09:05 AM
Bunnahabhain 31 Oct 05 - 08:35 AM
Amos 30 Oct 05 - 11:00 PM
Rapparee 30 Oct 05 - 09:40 PM
Acme 30 Oct 05 - 01:34 PM
rumanci 30 Oct 05 - 12:50 PM
Amos 30 Oct 05 - 12:32 PM
Amos 29 Oct 05 - 10:37 PM
Amos 29 Oct 05 - 10:20 PM
GUEST,Melpp (pronounced "Mee-LIP") 29 Oct 05 - 09:04 PM
Rapparee 29 Oct 05 - 04:15 PM
Amos 29 Oct 05 - 12:20 PM
Rapparee 29 Oct 05 - 09:32 AM
Amos 29 Oct 05 - 03:59 AM
Rapparee 28 Oct 05 - 10:16 PM
Rapparee 28 Oct 05 - 03:22 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 03:38 PM

From Roget's Thesaurus

dippy

ADJECTIVE: Slang. So senseless as to be laughable: absurd, foolish, harebrained, idiotic, imbecilic, insane, lunatic, mad, moronic, nonsensical, preposterous, silly, softheaded, tomfool, unearthly, zany. Informal : cockeyed, crazy, loony, loopy. Slang : balmy2, dopey, jerky, sappy, wacky. See ABILITY, KNOWLEDGE.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 10:37 AM

There are many ways to lose face in the world, and one learns to deal with most of them through the course of a lifetime:

MSNBC reports on an exception:

Woman loses face in encounter with seal
Beast gives seal of disapproval to assistance, bites off South African's nose
Updated: 4:52 p.m. ET Oct. 31, 2005

JOHANNESBURG - A seal bit off a South African woman's nose after she tried to help it back into the sea, an official said Monday.

Elsie van Tonder, 49, is expected to undergo surgery this week after being bitten on a beach near George, about 400 kilometers (240 miles) east of Cape Town on Saturday.

Her nose was found but could not be reattached to her face, local media reported.




I guess the real world -- including seals -- doesn't understand how helpful some people would be, if only you would let them... :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 10:12 AM

Turns out I am in good company -- the American Heritage Dictionary its own self has no known origin for "dippy". Mebbe it sprang from the popular Dippy Bird novelty toy of the 1940-50's.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 09:13 AM

Let me point out that the Idaho Legion has been so laid back for so long that it's fallen flat on its face (and likes it there). And it hasn't ever proven anything except maybe the effects of proof.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 09:03 AM

Sorry, Wrong window! If that last comment doesn't make much sense, that would be as it was supposed to go to Crystal, not Moab.

Why are women so hard to calm down? Just because someone's found a video of me, in an interesting situation with a rather drunk group of Poles, she's acting as if it's the end of the world...

Amos is right
...do you not remember what it feels like to be genuinely loved for what you are, not for what you can prove? Ya need to get laid back here, buddy, the stress level is WAY too high ...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 08:57 AM

F-Troop? You don't know about F-Troop?? Dang, the entire series is required viewing during Basically Training for the Legion.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 08:52 AM

If it is shown on Saturday,it'll most likey be upstaged by Freiderike's new dress, or a dozen other things. Don't worry about it dear


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Nov 05 - 05:28 AM

That;s sure a song I, too, would call dippy. Which, I might add, is a word for which I have no etymology and would lover to have some. Wherever sprang it?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 11:22 PM

If you're looking for dippy songs, Mudcat's own Blackcatter has a site that provided the following:

The end of the Civil War was near when quite accidentally,
A hero who sneezed abruptly seized retreat and reversed it to victory.

His medal of honor pleased and thrilled his proud little family group.
While pinning it on some blood was spilled and so it was planned he'd command F-Troop.

Where Indian fights are colorful sights & nobody takes a lickin'
Where pale face and redskin both turn chicken.

When killing and fighting get them down, they know their morale can't droop.
As long as they all relax in town before they resume with a bang and a boom F-Troop.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 10:59 PM

ROFLMAO! Rapaire, man, you are funny. The SOCAL Surfing, Bikers, Tokers, Tanners and Granola Brigade are rolling around on their barracks floor and discussing PsyOps strategies. They are sure they have a weiner on their hands!! Hot Dog!!

These are not Sesame Street wannabes, Smurf-lovers, or Care-Bear-airheads. These are veterans, who survived the Beat era, the Hip era, the Folk Scare, the Flower Chile era, the New Young Republicans era, the Carter Years, the real estate boom, the real estate bust, the Golden State era and the Fool's Golden State era. They have been around more blocks than your Legionairres could even imagine.

But never mind. You-all go forth and wrestle the world, and the PsyOps boys will ufold their summer lightning as gentle as dew on the barley, an' before you know it, you will be dioscovering how truly beautiful the world is with you in it.

Thanks for the grins, compadre. Safe harbor, safe return, keep the wind at your back... LOL!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 10:43 PM

Now listen here, Mom.

I have to go to Minneapolis on Friday. And on Sunday I have to fly back to Salt Lake City so that I can catch a plane to Boise on Monday morning, and I won't be back here until late Tuesday night.

I'll be around for a couple more days, anyway, but while I'm gone I want you to be good. And don't you believe all that cra...guff that Amos puts out. Granola Brigands and all that...that's a lot of hooey. Why, if the Idaho Legion had those Southern California girly-boys in the Legion Hovel for just one minute those Socal Socialites would be drunk under the BASEMENT table, cleaned out of their cash in a poker game, and found wanting in the...well, in the kissing department. In two minutes the Legion would have recruited 'em and shipped 'em off to Basically Training at the Booty Camp in Daniels. That's Camp "Jack" Daniels, and it's called that because when the crutes get there they don't know jack, the DIs jack around with 'em, and when they get out they've been jacked up pretty darn good. At least that's the official reason for the name.

But don't you let Amos fool you, Mom. You Know What Sort Of Person He Is. Stick with Stilly or Bunn or even Bee-Dubya.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 03:40 PM

La, la, la, la, la, la, sing a happy song
La, la, la, la, la, la, Smurf the whole day long

(whistle) - Smurf along with me
(whistle) - simple as can be

Next time you're feeling blue just let a smile begin
Happy things will come to you so Smurf yourself a grin

(spoken) "Ooh, I hate Smurfs! I'll get you, I'll get all of you, If it's the last thing I'll ever do!"

La, la, la, la, la, la, now you know the tune
La, la, la, la, la, la, you'll be Smurfing soon.


Thank goodness I never heard THAT!

Or this:

Singing the blues when the home teams lose it's a crisis in your life
On the run 'cause all your girlfriends wanna be your wife
Wouldn't you like to get away?

Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got;
Taking a break from all your worries sure would help a lot.
Wouldn't you like to get away?

All those nights when you've got no lights, the check is in the mail;
And your little angel hung the cat up by it's tail;
And your third fianc� didn't show;

Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name,
And they're always glad you came;
You want to be where you can see, our troubles are all the same;
You want to be where everybody knows your name.

Climbing the walls when no one calls; you've lost at love again.
And the more you're down and out, the more you need a friend.
When you long to hear a kind hello.

Roll out of bed, Mr. Coffee's dead; the morning's looking bright;
And your shrink ran off to Europe, and didn't even write;
And your husband wants to be a girl;

Be glad there's one place in the world where everybody knows your name,
And they're always glad you came;
You want to go where people know, people are all the same;
You want to go where everybody knows your name.


OUTRO
Where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad you came;
Where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad you came.


And, Allah be praised!, neither of these:

Theme Song #1

I wanna be a Care Bear. Oh It will be so great to when I'm a Care Bear
Oh I can hardly wait to be a Care Bear and do the things Care Bears do.
Oh I wanna be a Care Bear Like you! You do?

I'll be like Funshine and make the sunshine
And have heart like Love-a-Lot.
I'll be like Wish Bear and always be there.
We'll be the luckiest bears in Care-a-Lot.

I wanna be a Care Bear and fill the world with love
To be a Care Bear is what I'm dreaming of.
We'll make a great pair. We'll stick together through and through Like glue.

I don't wanna be a cook or a fireman and I don't wanna play trombone in the marching band.
I just wanna be a care Bear Like you! I just wanna be a Care Bear.


Theme song #2 (used in some of the reruns)

Care Bear Countdown, 4, 3, 2, 1
Who's that comin' from somewhere up in the sky?
Moving fast and bright as a firefly
Just when you think the trouble's gonna pounce
Who's gonna be there when it really counts?
Do the Care Bear Countdown
And send a wish out through the air
Just do the Care Bear Countdown
When you need them they'll be there
Don't be afraid when trouble's brewin' in your heart
If you can dream just send a wish out in the dark
And do the Care Bear's Countdown 5, 4, 3, 2, 1


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 12:48 PM

I am sooo glad I don't live in Florida.

And what about the price of hamster food?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 12:46 PM

I think freds alternate between the theme songs of Friends and Cheers depending on their current psychosexual status and whether they are pre- or post- genetic replication.

on the gripping hand, ralfs - those beings that have raised obnoxiousness to the limit - sing the theme from "Smurfs" Har!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 12:19 PM

I'm on a first-name basis with several Home Depot clerks. Remodeling over a prolonged period feels somewhat like a tornado hit the place.

I thought freds sang the theme song to Cheers. (now get it out of your head)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 12:18 PM

Oh, Rapaire, Rapaire...do you not remember what it feels like to be genuinely loved for what you are, not for what you can prove? Ya need to get laid back here, buddy, the stress level is WAY too high -- all these JUDGEMENTS, maan. You are too groovy to waste on all these JUDGEMENTS . Ya wanna get in touch with your inner perfection, dude, and honor it, see? Otherwise, it's all illegitimi carborundum, ya know whaddI mean, dude?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 11:49 AM

a group that can be defeated with either a right hook, or a manly embrace . . .

you are still talking the California Granola Brigade here, yes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 11:47 AM

They're like big ol' spiders, who embrace you, admire you, suck out your juices, eat your innards, and honor your memory with a huge belch.

    Isn't that what Freds do, after having stunned their victims with the theme song from Freinds? I think it's all a big front, and the bad acting is a cover for their non human origins.
    That would make anything with Shatner in it a really clever cover. It makes the idea of aliens seem so ridiculous that nobody notices. After all who could take a group that can be defeated with either a right hook, or a manly embrace seriously....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 11:41 AM

You know you live in Florida if...

YOUR SISTER'S FAMILY, PREVIOUSLY ADDICTED TO THE ORLANDO AREA,
WON'T COME DOWN FOR THANKSGIVING, EVEN THOUGH YOU ASSURE THEM THAT
"HURRICANE SEASON IS OVER BY THEN, ALICE!"

You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.

You have more than 300 'C' and 'D' batteries in your kitchen drawer.

Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti O's.

You are thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood covering your windows.

When describing your house to a prospective buyer, you say it has
three bedrooms, two baths, and one safe hallway.

Your SSN isn't a secret, it's written in Sharpie on your arms.

You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at Home Depot.

The road leading to your house has been declared a 'No-Wake' Zone.

You decide that your patio furniture looks better on the bottom of the
pool.

You own more than three large coolers.

You can wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and not feel the
least bit guilty about it.

You rationalize helping a friend board up by thinking "It'll only take
a gallon of gas to get there and back".

You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled with water in your
freezer.

Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain; today you can
assemble a portable generator by candlelight.

You catch a 13-pound redfish - in your driveway.

You can recite from memory whole portions of your homeowner's
insurance policy.

At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy with the biggest
chainsaw.

There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.

You can rattle off the names of three or more meteorologists who work
at the Weather Channel and every single newscaster and reporter at all
of the major stations in town.

Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your roof.

Ice is a valid topic of conversation.

Relocating to South Dakota does not seem like such a crazy idea.

You spend more time on your roof then in your living room.

You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer, fence builder, or a
tree worker.

Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily mean it's
Christmas.

The hurricane shutter guy and your roofer are driving BMW's.

You know the difference between the "good side" of a storm and the
"bad side."

You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the air conditioning.

A battery powered TV is considered a home entertainment center.

A chain saw, generator or a gas grill comes as a free gift with every
new Florida mortgage.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 10:31 AM

Okay. I was afraid you were going to burst into the theme song for Friends. (I'm just guessing that was on NBC because I never watched it. My kids watch it now in reruns.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 09:00 AM

NBC is mil-speak for Nuclear, Biological or Chemical weapons.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 08:53 AM

NBC = CBR = Nuclear Biological Chemical [warfare] = Chemical Biological Radiological [warfare].

I don't WANNA be embraced, admired, and honored by a bunch of granola-swigging, Birckenstock-wearing, sandal makers from Southern California. They're like big ol' spiders, who embrace you, admire you, suck out your juices, eat your innards, and honor your memory with a huge belch. Besides, there ain't all that much to embrace, admire and honor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 08:42 AM

we had one (1) trick-or-treater; my great-niece (who is a really cute 3.5 years old) and I almost missed her as she had a party to go to, got home just as her folks had put her back into the car to drive away.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Nov 05 - 12:07 AM

Okay, I'll bite:

they may have felt we were using NBC on 'em, I guess.

Using NBC on them? What the heck are you talking about? I don't watch much televison, but perhaps you're not talking about the National Broadcasting Corporation?

I did watch tv tonight though, one of the old movie channels. In the front room near the door in case kids came by. The Uninvited was on, a great black and white film made in 1944. It still manages to send chills up my spine!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 11:17 PM

Strange night -- we had only three visits even though we live in the right kind of neighborhood for more. The fact that the front drive was cluttered with sawhorses and drop cloths and drying newly-sprayed baseboards and the air stank of clear finish might have had something to do with it...they may have felt we were using NBC on 'em, I guess.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 09:32 PM

You guys have to come by my house and do some trick or treating. It's getting cold out there and there haven't been many kids stopping by. The dogs are in the garage and I took my "No Soliciting" sign off of the door. (I may have missed a few kids early on, because I didn't take it off till I noticed it on the glass when the first batch of kids was bold enough to ring my bell. It's a simple hand-lettered sign that says "No Soliciting. I mow my own grass. I don't want to know about your religion.")

Mom, would you like some chocolate?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 08:49 PM

Sigh...you just don't get it. The Brigade specializes in making you NOT afraid of them!! They HONOR your masculine power. They ADMIRE your rugged individualism. They EMBRACE you as you are....


THEN they extend....


Peace, bro!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 04:10 PM

"Don" is actually Don Diego de la Vega's first name. Correctly, he is called "Don Don" as I am correctly (when I am dressed up correctly) addressed as "Don Cecil". Of course, I call him "Donny" and he calls me "Cease." Diego is part of Donny's surname, which is "Diego de la Vega." My surname is "Diego de la Vega y Madre de Dios!" (with the !). Our shared surnames used to be "Diego de la Verga" but our great-great-great grandma changed it for obvious reasons.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 03:39 PM

one shudders to think with what Don Perro makes "the sign of the Pee"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 03:30 PM

Yeah -- a 1999 Honda Civic LX. I'm still drivin' it, too. It's outside in the parking lot. And I didn't hook up with Sorcha during the day, 'cause we went to different truck stops. Ha ha ha!

And I ain't afraid of no granola crunchers, neither. Today, for instance, I am in my working clothes, the ones I wear when I appear (as I often do) as Cecil Diego de la Vega y Madre de Dios!, partially legitimate brother to Don Diego de la Vega (who is know world wide as Zorro) and who wrongs rights as Perro, who makes the sign of the Pee.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 01:59 PM

Fine nephew you got there Mister Rapire, no mistake, a liberal in the making.

But you wuz driving something the night you didn't hook up with Sorcha. Besides, talkin' about shooting back means you aren't familiar with the power of the SOCAL Granola Brigades powerful Psyops equipment. They'd turn you into a flower chile faster'n you could say "ergot". Quod ergot demonstrarum!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 12:42 PM

Very good report! Bet this guy reads Harper's.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 12:34 PM

Din't have no rental truck. Got moved by professionals -- and there ain't no bunch from Sissy Socal that could ketch me. 'Sides, I shoot back.

But on a different note -- my nephew is attending the Illinois Institute of Technology in Chicago. This, like Cal Poly and MIT, is a School For Nerds. The Chicago White Sox recently played in, and won, the World Series (that's a baseball thing, for those outside of the US and Canada). His mother suggested that he walk the six blocks from his dorm to Cellular One stadium and check out the scene, since it would probably be the only time in the kid's life that a Chicago team would even be playing in the Series.

Here's his report:

So, I just went over to U.S. Cellular and walked around the
circumference of the stadium and the parking lots for a while. Let me
just say, mom, you would have loved it (other than the 42 degrees and
raining part.) So, without further ado, here is the report:

Time period: 6:40 p.m. - 7:25 p.m.

Number of uniformed Sox officials: one for each entry point plus one
overseeing each set of entry points. approx. 80.

Times I'm pretty sure I still could have snuck in if I had wanted to: 1

Number of uniformed CPD officers: too many to count. at least 100.

Number of mounted CPD officers: 9

Number of CPD vehicles: 16 that I saw. Mostly cars and SUV's, but
also 3 or 4 of what seemed to be police RVs.

Vehicles parked in the spots closest to the main entrance to the
field: Limousines and RVs.

Number of RVs in said area: at least 30

Number of limousines in said area: 18 (including an H2 limo and a
Cadillac Escalade Limo)

Number of dirty looks from limo drivers while making this count: 3

Number of possible baseball stars seen: 1 (large, muscular african-
american man talking to the driver of the Escalade limo)

Number of times I was told to turn around and walk the other way by
police officers: 1 (approximately on the southwest side of the field)

Number of people begging for money: 1

Number of people begging for extra tickets: 9

Number of empty parking spaces seen in the parking lot NE of the
stadium: 1 (SUV's double parked on either side but a small car could
still fit.)

Time national anthem started to play: approx. 7:05 p.m.

Time of getting locked in the parking lot with two middle aged guys
and all having to jump the 6' high fence: approx. 7:15 p.m.

Time of first fireworks went of signaling Sox's first home run:
approx. 7:20 p.m.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 12:06 PM

If Ilda known, Mister Rapire, back when you was running that caravan up inter Idayho, that you was gonna end up talking like that, you know I woulda sent the SOCAL Surfing, Bikers, Tokers, Tanners and Granola Brigade out to intercept you. They woulda surrounded yer rentatruck with they Harleys and forced you to turn Southwest on a dime. They have means an' ways of altering even the most intransigent mindset, you know, do the SSBTT&G Brigade; their psyops are unrivalled inthe world.

If ONLY I'lda known....


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 09:05 AM

Yeah, yeah, Amos, but even Mom knows about those people who live in Southern California. Hedonistic lustful live-for-the-moment drug-crazed atheistic car-happy unamerican sex-crazed whacko Commie surfer fast-food-eating welfare-cheating polytheistic Liberals, every one of them, just like all of them hippies living in those communes in Orange County and LA.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 31 Oct 05 - 08:35 AM

Since when has being nowhere near an event, and being busy with something totally unconnected ever stopped people for being blamed for it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Oct 05 - 11:00 PM

Mr Rapper, it wuz you your own self who brought up the question of alternate types of grass, I believe, while I was altogether away. So if Mom (who is smarter than both of us put together) figgers out ANYthing, it won't be about me!!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Oct 05 - 09:40 PM

Sorry I wasn't around earlier today, Mom, but I was off exploring the Curlew National Grassland.

Really.

And no, Amos, it wasn't THAT kind of grass! The very idea! Humph! Now Mom knows where where YOUR mind is at!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Oct 05 - 01:34 PM

Isn't that nice--catch and release even though it was a record-breaker!

Sorry I wasn't around yesterday, Mom. I was painting a cabinet. Looks real nice now, in the livingroom with the kids' computer stuff on it. Now I can have my library table back.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: rumanci
Date: 30 Oct 05 - 12:50 PM

From A Child's Garden of Bullshit



OH NO !!


May I throw a quoit into the ring ?
How contrary doth that seem ?
Not at all Merry
sigh


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Oct 05 - 12:32 PM

Ah, woe, ah, woe
My Mom is feeling l0ow.
Ah, then, ah, then,
Go pull her up again.
Bu why, but why?
To make your Mother high.
How so? How so?
It's the only way to go.
Oh, say! Oh, say!
It is the MOAB way.


From A Child's Garden of Bullshit
By B.S. Masters
Wan, Peaked and Chilled, pubs.
Buffalo, 1939


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 10:37 PM

Mom:

I know you worry about the kind of company we bring home and who we hang around with.

Just so you know, the Mudcat has very respectable European forebears. Here's a photo of one of them with Rapaire and Bunn.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 10:20 PM

Funny, you sound just like them -- are you sure they didn't pull a switcheroo on you?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Melpp (pronounced "Mee-LIP")
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 09:04 PM

We have taken Washington, DC. Our allies, freds, have captured a Jena Bush and her female cognate; freds will utilize the captives genetic material to correct a recent mutation problem. We have taken over the brains of your leaders.

You would do well to surrender your planet. We will be merciful if you do.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 04:15 PM

Well, there's not much going on at the gun battery, so I came home. Besides, it's raining and everyone knows that Mars doesn't attack in the rain.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 12:20 PM

The animal kingdom is also going wonky on us:

FOURTEEN LITTLE PIGS CLONED IN ITALY, October 28
Italian scientist Cesare Galli has succeeded in cloning 14 piglets following earlier successes with a bull and a horse, the Ansa news agency said Friday.
Full story at http://www.physorg.com/news7661.html

ASTHMATIC CATS MAY BE ALLERGIC TO PEOPLE, October 27
Cats have long been blamed for causing human health problems, but now Scottish veterinarians say they've found humans can cause asthma attacks in cats.
Full story at http://www.physorg.com/news7654.html

I suppose cats only get asthma from humans who have uncooperative attitudes.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 09:32 AM

I've been assigned as loader for the 175mm Quaker cannons, Battery B, Firebase Alferd Packer. My job is to make sure that there is sufficent ammunition for the gunners and to make sure that they are loaded all the time.

War With Mars Is Hell.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Oct 05 - 03:59 AM

Acting all rarified are ye, old buddy? Thin bue blood goin' to yer head? Never mind, I'll see she gets to the top safely.

Sorry yer so busy!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Oct 05 - 10:16 PM

Doggone it Mom! If you want to go slumming down at the bottom of the list at least get someone who's familiar with the slums to go with you. Someone like Amos.

I'm going to be pretty busy this weekend, what with the Martian Invasion and all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Oct 05 - 03:22 PM

Sereant Major Minor informs me that Colonel Suh has, with consent of General Panneck, decided that the Legion will remain at their posts and fight off the coming Martian Attack. Already the torpedo tubes have been loaded and real ammunition has been issued to those thought capable of handling it.

Colonel Suh has also noted that as soon as the Martians are defeated she will issue orders to "ride like the wind" for Upstate New York to "capture, hogtie, and bring to justice the entity which calls itself M (for Martian) Mario" on charges of barretry, flotsam, feme sole, petit treason, grand mal, indecent disclosure, and aiding and abetting. "Capture him, hang him, and convict him," her order reads. "Be like John Wayne toilet paper and don't take no shit off nobody."


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