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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

polaitaly 14 Oct 04 - 04:34 PM
polaitaly 14 Oct 04 - 04:35 PM
Amos 14 Oct 04 - 05:02 PM
Rapparee 14 Oct 04 - 06:41 PM
Little Hawk 14 Oct 04 - 07:18 PM
Amos 14 Oct 04 - 09:47 PM
Acme 15 Oct 04 - 12:16 AM
Amos 15 Oct 04 - 12:20 AM
Rustic Rebel 15 Oct 04 - 12:59 AM
beardedbruce 15 Oct 04 - 02:13 AM
Amos 15 Oct 04 - 09:04 AM
Amos 15 Oct 04 - 09:12 AM
Rapparee 15 Oct 04 - 09:13 AM
Acme 15 Oct 04 - 10:45 AM
Amos 15 Oct 04 - 10:56 AM
Amos 15 Oct 04 - 02:15 PM
Ima Gittin' 16 Oct 04 - 01:45 PM
Ima Gittin' 16 Oct 04 - 01:47 PM
Ima Gittin' 16 Oct 04 - 01:52 PM
Acme 16 Oct 04 - 10:57 PM
Rapparee 17 Oct 04 - 09:50 AM
Rapparee 17 Oct 04 - 10:19 AM
Rapparee 17 Oct 04 - 09:18 PM
Rustic Rebel 18 Oct 04 - 02:14 AM
Acme 18 Oct 04 - 09:41 AM
Amos 18 Oct 04 - 12:53 PM
JennyO 18 Oct 04 - 01:35 PM
Amos 18 Oct 04 - 02:17 PM
Acme 18 Oct 04 - 02:29 PM
Amos 18 Oct 04 - 02:31 PM
Rapparee 18 Oct 04 - 06:11 PM
GUEST,MMario 18 Oct 04 - 08:25 PM
GUEST,Mama MOAB 18 Oct 04 - 08:46 PM
Rapparee 18 Oct 04 - 10:08 PM
Rapparee 19 Oct 04 - 09:00 AM
Acme 19 Oct 04 - 11:18 AM
Amos 19 Oct 04 - 11:19 AM
Acme 19 Oct 04 - 11:33 AM
Ima Gittin' 19 Oct 04 - 11:42 AM
GUEST,Stilly River Sage 19 Oct 04 - 11:49 PM
Rustic Rebel 20 Oct 04 - 02:12 AM
Rapparee 20 Oct 04 - 08:37 AM
Amos 20 Oct 04 - 10:15 AM
Rapparee 20 Oct 04 - 11:27 AM
Amos 20 Oct 04 - 11:41 AM
Acme 20 Oct 04 - 12:03 PM
Acme 20 Oct 04 - 12:09 PM
Acme 20 Oct 04 - 12:09 PM
Acme 20 Oct 04 - 12:10 PM
Acme 20 Oct 04 - 12:11 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: polaitaly
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 04:34 PM

Can I open the 98 ?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: polaitaly
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 04:35 PM

Thank you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 05:02 PM

My navel has retuned! Say "Amen"! Now I have a place to keep the lint!


Retuning a navel is just a matter of knowing where to place the torque, finding the handle, so to speak, kind of like a guyitar!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 06:41 PM

I play trumpet, the instrument of the Gods. I don't play no steenkin' guitar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 07:18 PM

There's no place like home, is there?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Oct 04 - 09:47 PM

String job, blow job, it is still just a matter of finding the handle. Glad it worked for you.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 12:16 AM

Or it's a matter of fiddling the handle or handling the middle or torquing the fiddle or blowing the fill in the blank.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 12:20 AM

Be it ever so decadent
There is nooo place like home!!

Tom Leherer


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 12:59 AM

Just saying the word 72 times and knowing is believing makes me want more. Decadent. I like it. I repeat it. I will do the deca-dance thing just because I will..
(I said to myself, just be still tonight. Do no say anything. Don't type a word or more that could or will make you look like an ass)

Amos,
Have I mentioned to you lately that I love you?

Little Hawk, So glad your home, now would ya clean up your bedroom? we got guests comin' over.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: beardedbruce
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 02:13 AM

decadent

from

deca- prefix meaning ten
dent- meaning tooth


ten teeth?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 09:04 AM

decadence

1549, from M.Fr. decadence (1413), from M.L. decadentia "decay," from decadentem (nom. decadens) "decaying," prp. of decadere "to decay," from L. de- "apart, down" + cadere "to fall" (see case (1)). Used of periods in art since 1852, on Fr. model. Decadent is from 1837.


I like "Ten-Teeth", though. It brings to mind certain Appalachian love-bugs I have seen.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 09:12 AM

RR:

When ya sez things like hat you makes mah day!!

I loves you too.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 09:13 AM

Goooooooollee, Amos. Ya mean like these young studs? Er do ya mean this here hot babe from LH's home town?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 10:45 AM

Geez, Rap, where'd you get that last one? Looks like shes working on a huge blow job!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 10:56 AM

Rapaire:

If you possibly can do so, please get that link to the photo of LH's mum deleted. It's really beyond the pale.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Oct 04 - 02:15 PM

I have taken Rapaire's advise -- and you should all realize, and be forewarned:

Your Superhero Identity For Today Is:


Name: Ice Man
Secret Identity: Amos
Special Power: Flaming Hands
Transportation: Quantum Scooter
Weapon: Electron Lasso
Costume: Bulletproof Mask
Sidekick: Gilligan
Nemesis: Cindy the Clever
Tragic Flaw: Addicted to squash
Favorite Food: Spaghetti


So be careful!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ima Gittin'
Date: 16 Oct 04 - 01:45 PM

And I will be....


Name: Storm Raven
Secret Identity: Ima Gittin
Special Power: Walk through walls
Transportation: Magnetic Rollerblades
Weapon: Dimensional Blunderbuss
Costume: Golden Mask
Sidekick: Pippin
Nemesis: Cindy the Ripper
Tragic Flaw: Addicted to noodles
Favorite Food: Fried Chicken


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ima Gittin'
Date: 16 Oct 04 - 01:47 PM

Hey....looky there...two baddun's....both of 'em Cindy. Betcha theys them twins down Duck Holler Way....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ima Gittin'
Date: 16 Oct 04 - 01:52 PM

Will the Mother keep the Secret of the Secret Identities?
Will the Identities of the Cindys be divulged?
Tune in next time...same MOAB Time Same MOAB Channel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Oct 04 - 10:57 PM

Some of us have trouble keeping our Secret Santa status straight, let alone our superhero standing. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 04 - 09:50 AM

My superhero isn't standing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 04 - 10:19 AM

MY superhero:

Name: Ice Panther
Secret Identity: Cutter John
Special Power: Blazing Finger
Transportation: Magnetic Bike
Weapon: Ice Flare
Costume: Chain Suit
Sidekick: Clarence
Nemesis: Nancy the Black
Tragic Flaw: Clumsiness
Favorite Food: Banana Cream Pie

(Clarence is Opus's Secret Identity.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Oct 04 - 09:18 PM

Actually, my fave rave superhero of all time is the immortal, never-to-be-forgotten, Captain Underpants.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 02:14 AM

MY superhero:

Name: Shaky Legs
Secret Identity: Rustic Rebel
Special Power: Mindfulness
Transportation: Abounding Energy
Weapon: Lust
Costume: N/A
Sidekick: Sparking dust upon the hillside
Nemesis: Want to do wid you.
Tragic Flaw: broad likeness of Richard Simmons
Favorite Food:)for the moment) hot chicken wings


Is this a prerequisite into the farther side of the MOAB?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 09:41 AM

I'll bite: where's the website where these things are generated? I've seen this stuff before, but am not so inclined as to go searching for it. (Lazy Monday, I guess!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 12:53 PM

It is right here, SRS--or see the Rapaire post below on "super person within you".

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 01:35 PM

Name: Green Wolf
Secret Identity: JennyO
Special Power: Somatic Push
Transportation: Nuclear Car
Weapon: X-Ray Carbine
Costume: Electric Leotard
Sidekick: Dumbo
Nemesis: Jack the Crafty
Tragic Flaw: Addicted to Snapple
Favorite Food: Cake

What the hell is a somatic push? And I'm addicted to something I've never heard of!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 02:17 PM

It is a secret ray that causes sensations and pains in the body of the targeted individual.

Snapple is a line of fresh-fruit-juice drinks in glass bottles sold widely in the US.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 02:29 PM

Thanks Amos, I was out of town for a few days and didn't try to read every thread I missed as I catch up around here.

Well here it is:

Name: Golden Raven
Secret Identity: Stilly River Sage
Special Power: Somatic Spear
Transportation: Electric Plane
Weapon: Flame Grenade
Costume: Jewelled Robe
Sidekick: Bobo
Nemesis: Jasmine the Elder
Tragic Flaw: Narcolepsy
Favorite Food: Cashews

Considering some of the nasty "N" words out there the this system could have chosen, I'll accept a sleep disorder as that tragic flaw!

SRS Whooooshhh!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 02:31 PM

Well, great. You sound like my kind of super-hero. Very best regards to Bobo,

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 06:11 PM

At last! A viable alternative energy source!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 08:25 PM

Hi mom, I'm home!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Mama MOAB
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 08:46 PM

Hello, son, did you travel far and did you stay in this century?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Oct 04 - 10:08 PM

Wadjabringme?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Oct 04 - 09:00 AM

Didcha notice that I snagged number 4884, a palindromic number, an even number, and one divisible by all sorts of other numbers? Didcha, huh, didcha?

I claim dibs on all future divisible palindromic numbers!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Oct 04 - 11:18 AM

My jeweled robe is a bit on the toasty side today--this week it decided to be summer for a while longer in Texas. And I have to be careful with the flame thrower or I'll set the turf on fire.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Oct 04 - 11:19 AM

I guess they didn't mention, Mag, that the parts in between the jewels are made of monofilament fishnet??

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Oct 04 - 11:33 AM

Ah! That's it! I can remove the lining. But then I have to put some clothes on . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Ima Gittin'
Date: 19 Oct 04 - 11:42 AM

I'll take a robe....ENNY ROBE! Shoot-fahr...I'll even settle fer a gunny-sack! You betcha! All's I get is a durned golden mask.Whoop-de-diddly-doo. It's cold up here...an' rainy ta'boot!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 Oct 04 - 11:49 PM

Mom, you've slipped!

10 more to go to 4900


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 02:12 AM

I am humiliated this evening.
Not only because I was doing my own superwoman thing but because I didn't realise you all were doing your superhuman thing from a perception of life, from someone we don't even know, that may not even know or...
doesn't know diddly about shit or life or super humanoids, but someone who could be
a mass maggot eater that loves peeing on himself while he masterbates under the gymnasium bleachers while watching teenage cheeerleaders, turn themselves on to, steroidial young but flexable football stars of the future multi-millionaire generation, while knowing they can't tell you the difference between a noun and a verb, while perpetuating a moan and a distinct viral infection that goes beyound the normal relative thinking that anyone who could come up with a vitual superhero wanna-be name yourself and believe it if you have to, web site...
can get over on a MOAB.

Love and Kisses, Rustic


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 08:37 AM

My brother Ted ate maggots, but he didn't do the rest of the stuff, at least as far as I know.

He doesn't eat maggots anymore. Not for a long, long time. Ever since he left the Air Farce, in fact.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 10:15 AM

Iguess being in the military can do strange things to a feller's head.

RR, you are purely DIvine POetess material!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 11:27 AM

No, they made him eat them. Fried.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 11:41 AM

Using the "what doesn't kill you will make you stronger" theory of human development, huh??


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 12:03 PM

Ugg.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 12:09 PM

STOPPING BY WOODS ON A SNOWY EVENING
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.


Robert Frost


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 12:09 PM

THE ROAD NOT TAKEN
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 12:10 PM

MENDING WALL
Something there is that doesn't love a wall,
That sends the frozen-ground-swell under it,
And spills the upper boulders in the sun,
And makes gaps even two can pass abreast.
The work of hunters is another thing:
I have come after them and made repair
Where they have left not one stone on a stone,
But they would have the rabbit out of hiding,
To please the yelping dogs. The gaps I mean,
No one has seen them made or heard them made,
But at spring mending-time we find them there.
I let my neighbor know beyond the hill;
And on a day we meet to walk the line
And set the wall between us once again.
We keep the wall between us as we go.
To each the boulders that have fallen to each.
And some are loaves and some so nearly balls
We have to use a spell to make them balance:
'Stay where you are until our backs are turned!'
We wear our fingers rough with handling them.
Oh, just another kind of out-door game,
One on a side. It comes to little more:
There where it is we do not need the wall:
He is all pine and I am apple orchard.
My apple trees will never get across
And eat the cones under his pines, I tell him.
He only says, 'Good fences make good neighbors'.
Spring is the mischief in me, and I wonder
If I could put a notion in his head:
'Why do they make good neighbors? Isn't it
Where there are cows?
But here there are no cows.
Before I built a wall I'd ask to know
What I was walling in or walling out,
And to whom I was like to give offense.
Something there is that doesn't love a wall,
That wants it down.' I could say '.Elves' to him,
But it's not elves exactly, and I'd rather
He said it for himself. I see him there
Bringing a stone grasped firmly by the top
In each hand, like an old-stone savage armed.
He moves in darkness as it seems to me
Not of woods only and the shade of trees.
He will not go behind his father's saying,
And he likes having thought of it so well
He says again, "Good fences make good neighbors."


Robert Frost


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Oct 04 - 12:11 PM

'OUT, OUT--'
The buzz-saw snarled and rattled in the yard
And made dust and dropped stove-length sticks of wood,
Sweet-scented stuff when the breeze drew across it.
And from there those that lifted eyes could count
Five mountain ranges one behind the other
Under the sunset far into Vermont.
And the saw snarled and rattled, snarled and rattled,
As it ran light, or had to bear a load.
And nothing happened: day was all but done.
Call it a day, I wish they might have said
To please the boy by giving him the half hour
That a boy counts so much when saved from work.
His sister stood beside them in her apron
To tell them 'Supper'. At the word, the saw,
As if to prove saws knew what supper meant,
Leaped out at the boy's hand, or seemed to leap--
He must have given the hand. However it was,
Neither refused the meeting. But the hand!
The boy's first outcry was a rueful laugh.
As he swung toward them holding up the hand
Half in appeal, but half as if to keep
The life from spilling. Then the boy saw all--
Since he was old enough to know, big boy
Doing a man's work, though a child at heart--
He saw all spoiled. 'Don't let him cut my hand off
The doctor, when he comes. Don't let him, sister!'
So. But the hand was gone already.
The doctor put him in the dark of ether.
He lay and puffed his lips out with his breath.
And then -- the watcher at his pulse took fright.
No one believed. They listened at his heart.
Little -- less -- nothing! -- and that ended it.
No more to build on there. And they, since they
Were not the one dead, turned to their affairs.

Robert Frost


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