Lyrics & Knowledge Personal Pages Record Shop Auction Links Radio & Media Kids Membership Help
The Mudcat Cafemuddy

Post to this Thread - Printer Friendly - Home
Page: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25] [26] [27] [28] [29] [30] [31] [32] [33] [34] [35] [36] [37] [38] [39] [40] [41] [42] [43] [44] [45] [46] [47] [48] [49] [50] [51] [52] [53] [54] [55] [56] [57] [58] [59] [60] [61] [62] [63] [64] [65] [66] [67] [68] [69] [70] [71] [72] [73] [74] [75] [76] [77] [78] [79] [80] [81] [82] [83] [84] [85] [86] [87] [88] [89] [90] [91] [92] [93] [94] [95] [96] [97] [98] [99] [100] [101] [102] [103] [104] [105] [106] [107] [108] [109] [110] [111] [112] [113] [114] [115] [116] [117] [118] [119] [120] [121] [122] [123] [124] [125] [126] [127] [128] [129] [130] [131] [132] [133] [134] [135] [136] [137] [138] [139] [140] [141] [142] [143] [144] [145] [146] [147] [148] [149] [150] [151] [152] [153] [154] [155] [156] [157] [158] [159] [160] [161] [162] [163] [164] [165] [166] [167] [168] [169] [170] [171] [172] [173] [174] [175] [176] [177] [178] [179] [180] [181] [182] [183] [184] [185] [186] [187] [188] [189] [190] [191] [192] [193] [194] [195] [196] [197] [198] [199] [200] [201] [202] [203] [204] [205] [206] [207] [208] [209] [210] [211] [212] [213] [214] [215] [216] [217] [218] [219] [220] [221] [222] [223] [224] [225] [226] [227] [228] [229] [230] [231] [232] [233] [234] [235] [236] [237] [238] [239] [240] [241] [242] [243] [244] [245] [246] [247] [248] [249] [250] [251] [252] [253] [254] [255] [256] [257] [258] [259] [260] [261] [262] [263] [264] [265] [266] [267] [268] [269] [270] [271] [272] [273] [274] [275] [276] [277] [278] [279] [280] [281] [282] [283] [284] [285] [286] [287] [288] [289] [290] [291] [292] [293] [294] [295] [296] [297] [298] [299] [300] [301] [302] [303] [304] [305] [306] [307] [308] [309] [310] [311] [312] [313] [314] [315] [316] [317] [318] [319] [320] [321] [322] [323] [324] [325] [326] [327] [328] [329] [330] [331] [332] [333] [334] [335] [336] [337] [338] [339] [340] [341] [342] [343] [344] [345] [346] [347] [348] [349] [350] [351] [352] [353] [354] [355] [356] [357] [358] [359] [360] [361] [362] [363] [364] [365] [366] [367] [368] [369] [370] [371] [372] [373] [374] [375] [376] [377] [378] [379] [380] [381] [382] [383] [384] [385] [386] [387] [388] [389] [390] [391] [392] [393] [394] [395] [396] [397] [398] [399] [400] [401] [402] [403] [404] [405] [406] [407] [408] [409] [410] [411] [412] [413] [414] [415] [416] [417] [418] [419] [420] [421] [422] [423] [424] [425] [426] [427] [428] [429] [430] [431] [432] [433] [434] [435] [436] [437] [438] [439] [440] [441] [442] [443] [444] [445] [446] [447] [448] [449] [450] [451] [452] [453] [454] [455] [456] [457] [458] [459] [460] [461] [462] [463] [464] [465] [466] [467] [468] [469] [470] [471] [472] [473] [474] [475] [476] [477] [478] [479] [480] [481] [482] [483] [484] [485] [486] [487] [488] [489] [490] [491] [492] [493] [494] [495] [496] [497] [498] [499] [500] [501] [502] [503] [504] [505] [506] [507] [508] [509] [510] [511] [512] [513] [514] [515] [516] [517] [518] [519] [520] [521] [522] [523] [524] [525] [526] [527] [528] [529] [530] [531] [532] [533] [534] [535] [536] [537] [538] [539] [540] [541] [542] [543] [544] [545] [546] [547] [548] [549] [550] [551] [552] [553] [554] [555] [556] [557] [558] [559] [560] [561] [562] [563] [564] [565] [566] [567] [568] [569] [570] [571] [572] [573] [574] [575] [576] [577] [578] [579] [580] [581] [582] [583] [584] [585] [586] [587] [588] [589] [590] [591] [592] [593] [594] [595] [596] [597] [598] [599] [600] [601] [602] [603] [604] [605] [606] [607] [608] [609] [610] [611] [612] [613] [614] [615] [616] [617] [618] [619] [620] [621] [622] [623] [624] [625] [626] [627] [628] [629] [630] [631] [632] [633] [634] [635] [636] [637] [638] [639] [640] [641] [642] [643] [644] [645] [646] [647] [648] [649] [650] [651] [652] [653] [654] [655] [656] [657] [658] [659] [660] [661] [662] [663] [664] [665] [666] [667] [668] [669] [670] [671] [672] [673] [674] [675] [676] [677] [678] [679] [680] [681] [682] [683] [684] [685] [686] [687] [688] [689] [690] [691] [692] [693] [694] [695] [696] [697] [698] [699] [700] [701] [702] [703] [704] [705] [706] [707] [708] [709] [710] [711] [712] [713] [714] [715] [716] [717] [718] [719] [720] [721] [722] [723] [724] [725] [726] [727] [728] [729] [730] [731] [732] [733] [734] [735] [736] [737] [738] [739] [740] [741] [742] [743] [744] [745] [746] [747] [748] [749] [750] [751] [752] [753] [754] [755] [756] [757] [758] [759] [760] [761] [762] [763] [764] [765] [766] [767] [768] [769] [770] [771] [772] [773] [774] [775] [776] [777] [778] [779] [780] [781] [782] [783] [784] [785] [786] [787] [788] [789] [790] [791] [792] [793] [794] [795] [796] [797] [798] [799] [800] [801] [802] [803] [804] [805] [806] [807] [808] [809] [810] [811] [812] [813] [814] [815] [816] [817] [818] [819] [820] [821] [822] [823] [824] [825] [826] [827] [828] [829] [830] [831] [832] [833] [834] [835] [836] [837] [838] [839] [840] [841] [842] [843] [844] [845] [846] [847] [848] [849] [850] [851] [852] [853] [854] [855] [856] [857] [858] [859] [860] [861] [862] [863] [864] [865] [866] [867] [868] [869] [870] [871] [872] [873] [874] [875] [876] [877] [878] [879] [880] [881] [882] [883] [884] [885] [886] [887] [888] [889] [890] [891] [892] [893] [894] [895] [896] [897] [898] [899] [900] [901] [902] [903] [904] [905] [906] [907] [908] [909] [910] [911] [912] [913] [914] [915] [916] [917] [918] [919] [920] [921] [922] [923] [924] [925] [926] [927] [928] [929] [930] [931] [932] [933] [934] [935] [936] [937] [938] [939] [940] [941] [942] [943] [944] [945] [946] [947] [948] [949] [950] [951] [952] [953] [954] [955] [956] [957] [958] [959] [960] [961] [962] [963] [964] [965] [966] [967] [968] [969] [970] [971] [972] [973] [974] [975] [976] [977] [978] [979] [980] [981] [982] [983] [984] [985] [986] [987] [988] [989] [990] [991] [992] [993] [994] [995] [996] [997] [998] [999] [1000] [1001] [1002] [1003] [1004] [1005] [1006] [1007] [1008] [1009] [1010] [1011] [1012] [1013] [1014] [1015] [1016] [1017] [1018] [1019] [1020] [1021] [1022] [1023] [1024] [1025] [1026] [1027] [1028] [1029] [1030] [1031] [1032] [1033] [1034] [1035] [1036] [1037] [1038] [1039] [1040] [1041] [1042] [1043] [1044] [1045] [1046] [1047] [1048] [1049] [1050] [1051] [1052] [1053] [1054] [1055] [1056] [1057] [1058] [1059] [1060] [1061] [1062] [1063] [1064] [1065] [1066] [1067] [1068] [1069] [1070] [1071] [1072] [1073] [1074] [1075] [1076] [1077] [1078] [1079] [1080] [1081] [1082] [1083] [1084] [1085] [1086] [1087] [1088] [1089] [1090] [1091] [1092] [1093] [1094] [1095] [1096] [1097] [1098] [1099] [1100] [1101] [1102] [1103] [1104] [1105] [1106] [1107] [1108] [1109] [1110] [1111] [1112] [1113] [1114] [1115] [1116] [1117] [1118] [1119] [1120] [1121] [1122] [1123] [1124] [1125] [1126] [1127] [1128] [1129] [1130] [1131] [1132] [1133] [1134]


BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 27 May 06 - 03:38 PM
Rapparee 27 May 06 - 04:08 PM
Little Hawk 27 May 06 - 04:11 PM
Little Hawk 27 May 06 - 05:08 PM
Amos 27 May 06 - 07:48 PM
Little Hawk 27 May 06 - 07:51 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 27 May 06 - 08:03 PM
Acme 27 May 06 - 09:17 PM
Amos 28 May 06 - 01:48 AM
MMario 28 May 06 - 06:39 AM
Amos 28 May 06 - 04:23 PM
Little Hawk 28 May 06 - 04:32 PM
Amos 28 May 06 - 05:25 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 29 May 06 - 09:45 AM
Acme 29 May 06 - 11:26 AM
Amos 29 May 06 - 12:59 PM
Acme 29 May 06 - 02:39 PM
Amos 29 May 06 - 03:05 PM
Little Hawk 29 May 06 - 03:10 PM
Amos 29 May 06 - 03:44 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 29 May 06 - 05:32 PM
Amos 29 May 06 - 05:48 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 29 May 06 - 06:00 PM
Little Hawk 29 May 06 - 06:22 PM
Amos 29 May 06 - 06:33 PM
Rapparee 29 May 06 - 08:45 PM
Rapparee 29 May 06 - 09:30 PM
Amos 30 May 06 - 09:29 AM
Rapparee 30 May 06 - 11:41 AM
Rapparee 30 May 06 - 11:53 AM
Acme 30 May 06 - 12:21 PM
Amos 30 May 06 - 02:37 PM
Rapparee 30 May 06 - 02:46 PM
Rapparee 30 May 06 - 10:24 PM
Amos 30 May 06 - 11:09 PM
Rapparee 31 May 06 - 09:15 AM
Acme 31 May 06 - 10:05 AM
Rapparee 31 May 06 - 10:43 AM
Amos 31 May 06 - 10:51 AM
Rapparee 31 May 06 - 02:02 PM
Amos 31 May 06 - 07:46 PM
Rustic Rebel 01 Jun 06 - 01:52 AM
Rapparee 01 Jun 06 - 10:45 AM
MMario 01 Jun 06 - 11:02 AM
Rapparee 01 Jun 06 - 11:04 AM
MMario 01 Jun 06 - 11:07 AM
Rapparee 01 Jun 06 - 11:16 AM
Acme 01 Jun 06 - 12:59 PM
Rapparee 01 Jun 06 - 03:58 PM
Amos 01 Jun 06 - 04:51 PM
Lyrics & Knowledge Search [Advanced]
DT  Forum
Sort (Forum) by:relevance date
DT Lyrics:






Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 06 - 03:38 PM

I encountered a toad today while mowing the front lawn. Fortunately, he hopped away from the mower this time.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 May 06 - 04:08 PM

It's 41.4 F here and raining. No grass cutting, no porch sitting either. And guests coming....

Stilly, why not let the rotation of the Earth work for you? Tie the dogs outside facing the direction opposite the rotation of the Earth. They'd have to trot to stay in one place, like they were on a treadmill.

It's great ideas like that that got me into management!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 06 - 04:11 PM

What a terrific idea! You ought to start a nationwide exercise program and become famous, like Jane Fonda or Raquel Welch.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 06 - 05:08 PM

Strange. I have the feeling that Shatnerization is looming up, just around the corner.

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the center cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

-- William Butler Yeats, January 1919


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 06 - 07:48 PM

Well, Shatnerize this amigo: Western scientists (well, one guy in England) have finally solved the ancient puzzle about whether the chicken or the egg came first.

This is indeed history of a Shatnerian magnitude.

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 06 - 07:51 PM

Oh, man...I figured that one out decades ago. Of course the egg came first! Where have these people been?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 27 May 06 - 08:03 PM

Neither came first. One day, long ago, a little adult dinosaur poked his head out of his hole and said to himself, "Well, I think I'll evolve into a chicken today." This was a noble and worthy goal, so he climbed out of his hole, closed his eyes, and concentrated very, very hard on becoming a chicken.

Suddenly, his scales enlongated and POOF! suddenly they were feathers! His nasty little teeth and lips became pointed and hard and became a beak. He knew he was halfway to becoming the Pride of KFC!

However, muttering to himself like he'd been doing had attracted the attention of a prowling Allosaurus, which ate him as a snack on her way to the rotting carcass of an Apatosaurus.

What we call "chickens" are actually miniature polled elk. What we call "eggs" are actually seperate creatures which appear spontaneously under miniature polled elk.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 May 06 - 09:17 PM

I agree with Little Hawk. I figured this one out ages ago. A little critical thinking is all it takes.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 May 06 - 01:48 AM

Well, I got 12500; so flamenco ted did NOT come first. Anyway, I am glad you all were so astute, but how come you didn't publish?




A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 28 May 06 - 06:39 AM

12505.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 May 06 - 04:23 PM

That may be the answer, MM, but as written it is incomprehensible!


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 May 06 - 04:32 PM

Why publish something that is so painfully obvious as that the egg came before the chicken?

For christ's sake, there were eggs around for millions of years before chickens every walked on this planet. The chicken and the various other birds were apparently ancestors of the dinosaurs, who were themselves ancestors of primitive amphibians, who were themselves ancestors of primitive fish, etc.....

The EGG came first!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 May 06 - 05:25 PM

Well, perhaps it did, LH, but if it was a dinosaur that carried and laid the egg, why did it produce a chicken?

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 29 May 06 - 09:45 AM

I've already explained all that! Geez, don't you guys ever read? I searched out The Truth at great cost and terror to myself to publish The Truth but no, nobody believes me, nobody WANTS The Truth today!

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!! Amos and everybody is being mean to me!! MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!! Make 'em be nice, Mom!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 May 06 - 11:26 AM

Go outside and play, Rapaire and Amos. It's a nice day.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 06 - 12:59 PM

Mom, I want an invisibility cloak. Can we go to China and get one?




BEIJING, May 29 (Xinhuanet) -- New studies suggest that science-fiction portrayals of invisibility, such as Harry Potter's cloak, might be truly possible.

    Inspiring the new research is a type of material known as "metamaterial." Metamaterials have special properties because they are built with internal structures small enough to interact with light or other radiation. This allows scientists to build devices that can do things, such as bending light, in unique ways.

    Two separate teams of researchers have come up with theories on ways to use experimental metamaterials to cloak an object and hide it from visible light, infrared light, microwaves and perhaps even sonar probes.

    "Imagine a situation where a medium guides light around a hole in it," Ulf Leonhardt, a physicist of Britain's University of St. Andrews, reported in the journal Science.

    The light rays end up behind the object as if they had traveled in a straight line.

    "Any object placed in the hole would be hidden from sight. The medium would create the ultimate optical illusion: invisibility," Leonhardt wrote. "Such devices may be possible. The method developed here can be also applied to escape detection by other electromagnetic waves or sound."

    In this new theory, which is from that used on modern "stealth" bombers, which bounce radar off their surfaces so they cannot be seen, an object would be encased in a shell of metamaterials and they would create an illusion akin to a mirage, said David Schurig of Duke University in North Carolina, who worked on a second report, which also appears in the latest Science journal.

    "Think of space as a woven cloth," Schurig said. "Imagine making a hole in the cloth by inserting a pointed object between the threads without tearing them."

    The light, or microwaves, or radar would travel along the threads of the cloth, ending up behind the object without having touched it.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 May 06 - 02:39 PM

Amos, MOM doesn't have time to go to China today, I think she's cleaning up one of Gluon's messes. You'll have to be content with your periscope for now.

SRS


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 06 - 03:05 PM

Oh that old periscope is no fun. People can see ya using it. When Mister La French saw me looking over his hedges yesterday he said he was gonna shoot me. That's why I need an invisibility cloak. I guess he didn't want his wife to know about the baby he was making with that UPS lady.

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 May 06 - 03:10 PM

Don't shatnificate unless you have something useful to say.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 06 - 03:44 PM

LH, it was Gluon who was shatnificating. Right in the parlor. Mom was SO PO'd, man!

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 29 May 06 - 05:32 PM

Dear Mom,

I'm not running away from home, even though Amos is mean to me.

That'll fix him.

And I learned about the invisibility cloak last week, so there!

Love,
R


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 06 - 05:48 PM

Serves you right for not telling about it. Neener.


Mom!! Rapaire is a doodoo head!


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 29 May 06 - 06:00 PM

Have you noticed that there are now over 251 pages to the Book of MOAB? Page upon page of wit, grace, intelligence, and information completely unavailable elsewhere. Poetry and wisdom, prose and jibes, science and speculation -- offerings from Khandu and Tweed and Peace and SRS and Bee-Dubya-Ell and Joe Offer and 'most ever Catter. Even from Wienerhead Amos.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 May 06 - 06:22 PM

Never in the annals of human history has so much unadulteraded BS been inflicted upon so many by so few.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 06 - 06:33 PM

Obviously, my good Hawk, you have never read the Congressional Record. They inflict in a month thrice the BS we have raised here in three years!

Rapaire, I am sullen with you; you speak poorly of me in public places, and highly of yourself everywhere. It is unbecoming, sirrah, more fit for some scurrilous varlet.

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 May 06 - 08:45 PM

Amos, I would never disparage you. I tell everyone I know that you are without question the single most intelligent, witty, and best looking person I have ever met. Well-read, wise, informed, erudite, reasoning, cogitative, thoughtful, understanding, discerning, sensible, prudent, pansophistic, and blessed with a sapience beyond the ken of mortal man: faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap tall building with a single bound, and who, with his beloved dog "Yukon King" and his faithful Indian companion, Tonto, brings Truth, Justice, and the American Way to the snowy Yukon.

Astute
Modest
Openminded
Sage

Judicious
Educated
Smart
Sharp
Unlimited
Practical


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 May 06 - 09:30 PM

And I myself am but a humble public servant, one who makes but a pitiful attempt to provide to others that which may or may not supply their informational, educational, and recreational wants here in this vast cultural desert that is Eastern Idaho. I am nought but a mote of dust in bathed in Amos' nova-like brilliance, the poorest of worms that he would trample underfoot with nothing but a "Yuck! What's that on my shoe?", scrape me off, and continue on.

No, no, forget about me. Just leave me a rusty saw and a bullet to bite on while I cut off my legs. Don't let me detain you. I'll hold 'em off, but remember me to that Kid down in Louie's Bar. She's a good kid and deserved better than me. And (koff! koff!) mail this letter to my mom for me, willya? I ain't seen her in twenny years and I want her to have my last pay. Poor old woman, raising six kids on four acres, plowin' the field before she went to work pickin' coal in a two-foot seam for Mr. Peabody. And...and...Amos? Tell MOM my last thoughts were of her and not to cry 'cause I doin' this for America.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 06 - 09:29 AM

On second thought, Rapaire, how's about you revert to type. Your practiced humility is too rich for my poor, abused gut. LOL!


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 06 - 11:41 AM

I am extremely proud of my humility, I'll have you know! I'm proud, YES! proud to be so humble!

Say it long and say it loud,
I am humble and I am proud!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 06 - 11:53 AM

And that's because I come from humble stock. Born as I was into a little log cabin I built myself, we had nothing to eat for months on end but borrowed food. We'd pass it down in the family, each of us chewing it a bit, until the youngest actually got to swallow it. It was a hard life, but we grew up strong and straight, all of us good Americans, upright and honest, mostly. Why, I never saw television until I was well into my thirties, and as for radio, well, we'd heard about it. Yes, we'd talk about Jack Benny and The Shadow with our classmates at the exclusive St. Dismas School (we worked our way through mucking out sewers, because we knew the value of a good education) just as if we actually had a radio because youth is resilient. And being able to talk about things we knew nothing about has served us in good stead, as my brother is now an Alderman.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 May 06 - 12:21 PM

And (koff! koff!) mail this letter to my mom for me, willya? I ain't seen her in twenny years and I want her to have my last pay.

I bet the song this reminds me of is the cowboy song he stole this from. . .


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 06 - 02:37 PM

The idea that Rapaire would stoop to stealing phrases from traditional songs of any genre, and not identifying the sources he used, is...well, titllating, but I am sure he is quite above such shenanigans today.

A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 06 - 02:46 PM

Rapaire would never steal copyrighted material! He might, however, stoop to paraphrasing bad war movies.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 06 - 10:24 PM

Bad? Did I say bad? I meant really, really good war movies. Movies with REAL dialogue! Movies like, like, John Wayne and Ronald Reagan used to make.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 06 - 11:09 PM

"Life is tough, Private. It's TOUGHER if you're stupid."

John Wayne


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 06 - 09:15 AM

Dang right! Old Sarge said that to me just after he'd run naked through a minefield because he thought he was faster than the explosions. And he was, too, only he was also chewing on his cigar butt at the time and swallowed it. This caused him to realize that running naked through a minefield while chewing on a cigar butt was a pretty dumb thing even for him to do, especially since he had to slow down to throw up. Slowing down allowed the explosions to catch up to him and even pass him, so he lost the hundred bucks he bet on himself.

Yessir, ol' Sarge Rock. His real name was Percival, but we all called him Sarge Rock, mostly because he was dumber'n a rock. Ran into him a while back outside the Legion Hovel in Boise ("Broke-dick Mammalucca Post Number 1"), but even though I backed up and hit him again he wasn't hurt, darn it.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 May 06 - 10:05 AM

Well, I haven't watched the program much lately (my son is a deer in the headlights in the mornings if the tv is on) but Katie Couric is leaving the Today show today. They're playing some cute clips. Too bad Shatner doesn't have such charisma.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 06 - 10:43 AM

Katy Couric? Did she replace Dave Garroway or something?


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 May 06 - 10:51 AM

I think it was Walter Cronkite.


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 May 06 - 02:02 PM

Dear Mom,

Pray for me. I have to go to Salt Lake City in a little bit. I will, god(dess) willing, return tomorrow afternoon.

Your humble child,
R


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 May 06 - 07:46 PM

Dear Goddess:

Look after our Brother Rapaire and fill him with thy wisdom, thy gentleness, thy True Humility, and let him overflow with Thy Beneficent Feminine Energy for all his days. It would be really Speshul.

Thank you,


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 01:52 AM

Hello!!!!!!
Said this before but the goddess mention desersves another mention.......
Blowing smoke into the smoky room, fills the sky and drifts away like a random thought.
The Goddess within can hear it all. She stoops and listens carefully.
She didn't want to miss anything. She thought she heard a giggle but missed the punchline.
I will help you if you let me.
You will help yourself if you let you.
She was in the gray zone, she could walk through the mirror if she wanted.
The smoke filled the room and she lit another cigarette.
She's stronger than she knows, she is. She just has to look into the other side of the mirror. Walk right in there, she thought. Take a look inside the inside.
The goddess was revealed just thinking about it.
The thought drifted with the smoke and twirled around the giggle. Than she remembered, she did get the punchline.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 10:45 AM

Brother Rapaire has had about five hours sleep and is probably going to blow off today's budget discussion -- let his number 2 take it. The train Bro. Rapaire was in SLC to put his in-laws (and wife) on was an hour and half late, getting in at 4:45 a.m. instead of leaving at 3:45 a.m. Brother Rapaire is sitting in his room at the Comfort Inn, trying to get up enough energy and in-room coffee to start the day and the drive back, while plotting how to avoid rush hour traffic. And Brother Rapaire is danged glad that his in-laws don't visit often, 'cause his MIL won't fly and the train schedules SUCK!!!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 11:02 AM

Hi Mom! I'm home. Communicado was loverly - but a wee bit hot. And I only took the afghan, forgot the light-weight sheet. don't try to sleep with a heavy afghan over you when it's 94 degrees out and the humidity is high. Even when you get to sleep you wake up dehydrated. and stinky from sweat.

Other then that, the long weekend was great. Scenery nice; lots of purty flowers on the roadsides - and the locusts were blooming (the trees. Didn't see any of the hoppy kind) All 580 kids in my nephews class graduated; 50% of them with honors. pretty impressive.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 11:04 AM

Did you get out on Lake Communicado? I hear that the reflection of the Alps in its icy blue waters is lovely this time of year.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 11:07 AM

I drove by the lake - but they are now using it as a cooling pond for the solar energy tower - and the steam rising from the waters just didn't look very inviting. though the fishermen said that the trout were being poached perfectly.

On the other hand, the pool in the back yard was *just* right


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 11:16 AM

So, if you tossed in some white wine, dill, and a soupcon of butter, you could.... Yummy! I'll have to try that in the hotpots in Yellowstone!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 12:59 PM

I blanch at the thought of your poaching trout in Yellowstone's hot water.


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 03:58 PM

So do the fish!


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate

Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Jun 06 - 04:51 PM

A garrulous scurrilous poacher,
A moocher, a glib synecdocher
He would tell awesome lies
And would make googly-eyes
At librarians from Maine to Las Cochers!

Oh, it's not me, I tell you. It's this darned 12545!!! I can't get it to stop bothering me!


A


Post - Top - Home - Printer Friendly - Translate
Next Page

 


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.


You must be a member to post in non-music threads. Join here.



Mudcat time: 17 October 2:57 PM EDT

[ Home ]

All original material is copyright © 1998 by the Mudcat Café Music Foundation, Inc. All photos, music, images, etc. are copyright © by their rightful owners. Every effort is taken to attribute appropriate copyright to images, content, music, etc. We are not a copyright resource.