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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 06:59 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 06:58 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 06:25 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 06:19 PM
Amos 24 Feb 09 - 06:17 PM
gnu 24 Feb 09 - 06:15 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Feb 09 - 06:08 PM
Amos 24 Feb 09 - 06:07 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 04:13 PM
MMario 24 Feb 09 - 03:57 PM
Amos 24 Feb 09 - 02:55 PM
gnu 24 Feb 09 - 02:45 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Feb 09 - 02:35 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 02:31 PM
Amos 24 Feb 09 - 02:00 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 01:54 PM
Acme 24 Feb 09 - 01:08 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 12:48 PM
Amos 24 Feb 09 - 12:08 PM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 11:52 AM
Amos 24 Feb 09 - 09:27 AM
Rapparee 24 Feb 09 - 09:17 AM
Acme 24 Feb 09 - 01:09 AM
Janie 24 Feb 09 - 12:01 AM
Amos 23 Feb 09 - 04:39 PM
Rapparee 23 Feb 09 - 04:33 PM
Little Hawk 23 Feb 09 - 04:07 PM
MMario 23 Feb 09 - 04:06 PM
Rapparee 23 Feb 09 - 03:45 PM
Little Hawk 23 Feb 09 - 03:39 PM
Rapparee 23 Feb 09 - 02:27 PM
Amos 23 Feb 09 - 01:43 PM
Rapparee 23 Feb 09 - 12:56 PM
Little Hawk 23 Feb 09 - 12:52 PM
Rapparee 23 Feb 09 - 12:51 PM
Little Hawk 23 Feb 09 - 12:39 PM
Janie 23 Feb 09 - 12:33 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Feb 09 - 10:55 AM
Acme 23 Feb 09 - 10:47 AM
Acme 23 Feb 09 - 10:46 AM
Rapparee 23 Feb 09 - 09:31 AM
MMario 23 Feb 09 - 09:20 AM
Rapparee 23 Feb 09 - 08:59 AM
Amos 23 Feb 09 - 08:38 AM
Little Hawk 23 Feb 09 - 12:03 AM
Acme 22 Feb 09 - 11:28 PM
Janie 22 Feb 09 - 10:55 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Feb 09 - 10:35 PM
Rapparee 22 Feb 09 - 10:35 PM
Acme 22 Feb 09 - 10:15 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:59 PM

there's this:


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:58 PM

And, of course,


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:25 PM

Here's a neat video of worms in a tender embrace.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:19 PM

Just think: earthworms are hermaphrodites: They have 2 pairs of testes, surrounded by 2 pairs of testes sacs. There are 2 pairs of seminal vesicles which produce, store and release the sperm via the male pores, and ovaries and ovipores that release eggs via female pores. However, most also have one or more pairs of spermathecae (depending on the species) that are internal sacs which receive and store sperm from the other worm in copulation. Some species use external spermatophores for transfer instead.

The male reproductive organs consist of two pairs of testes, present ventro-laterally in the 10th and 11th segments. Each testis is made up of 4 to 8 processes containing spermatogonia. Each testis is enclosed in a pair of testes sacs which are filled with fluid. It is bilobed in the front and on the posterior side provided with a pair of ciliated spermaducal funnels, one on either side. Two pairs of seminal vesicles are present in the 11th and 12th segments which collect the sperm fluid. The testes sac of the tenth segment opens in the seminal vesicle of the 11th segment and testis sac of the 11th segment opens into the seminal vesicle of the 12th segment.

The sperm mother cells of the testes when shed offreach the seminal vesicle where they mature into sperms and then again passed into testes. Sperms from the testes are passed into the spermiducal funnels which lead into vas deferens. A pair of vasa deferentia on either side of nerve cord runs from the 12th segment to prostate region and opens out together with the prostate duct in the 18th segment as male genital aperture. The prostate is a large irregular gland present from the 16th to 20th or the 17th to 21st segments on either side, and it produces the prostate fluid. In the 17th and 19th segments each is found a pair of rounded, white fluffy masses, the accossory glands. These glands are present on ventro-lateral bodywall, one on either side of the nerve cord. They open to the exterior by a number of ducts in two pairs of genital pappillae, situated externally on either side of the mid-ventral line.

The female reproductive organs consist of a pair of ovaries, a pair of oviducts and four pairs of spermathecae.The ovaries are a pair of small, whitish, lobed structures, attached to the hinder face of the septum of the 12/13 segment, one on each side of the nerve cord.Each ovary has mature ova towards distal end and immature towards septal side.Each oviducal funnel leads into oviduct which opens outside in the 14th segment in the form of a common oviducal aperture.The four pairs of spermathecae are found on either side of the nerve cord in the 6th, 7th, 8th and 9th segments.Each spermathecae has two parts, a sac like structure, ampulla and a short diverticulum.The diverticulum stores the sperms while ampulla provides a nourishing fluid to them.These spermathecae open outside the bodyby four pairs of apertures one on either ventro-lateral sides of each segmental joint, i.e a pair in the 5-6, 6-7, 7-8, 8-9th segments.The mature ova shed from the ovaries, pass through the oviducal funnels into the oviduct and finally to the exterior through the female genital pore. Copulation and reproduction are separate processes in earthworms. The mating pair overlap front ends ventrally and each exchanges sperm with the other. The clitellum becomes very reddish to pinkish in color. The cocoon, or egg case, is secreted by the clitellum band which is near the front of the worm, but behind the spermathecae. Some time after copulation, long after the worms have separated, the clitellum secretes the cocoon which forms a ring around the worm. The worm then backs out of the ring, and as it does so, injects its own eggs and the other worm's sperm into it. As the worm slips out, the ends of the cocoon seal to form a vaguely lemon-shaped incubator (cocoon) in which the embryonic worms develop. They emerge as small, but fully formed earthworms, except for a lack of the sex structures, which develop later in about 60 to 90 days. They attain full size in about one year. Several common earthworm species are mostly parthenogenetic, that is, with asexual reproduction resulting in clones.

Isn't that fascinating?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:17 PM

You'll have to start a new thread for that, Gnu. This is a BS thread, not a HS thread.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:15 PM

Horseshit. Minds me of why the grass is so green and thick at the back of my yard. Bought this house next to the house I grew up in. I recall spreading and turning horseshit in the garden when I was a lad. And, the guy that owned this house didn't buy the good stuff. He bought the fresh stuff... with the big green flies hatching with every fork full.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:08 PM

Well... Actually it's only 280# for $10.00. I forgot it comes on 40# bags, not 50#. But, yes, we can catch "compost with cow manure" on sale at the right time (like spring planting season) for $1.39 a bag at the home center stores. It's not the GOOD stuff like Black Kow, but it's also not Black Kow's price of $4.50 a bag. And it may only be 5% cow manure and 95% dirt for all I know. I don't care any more. I have a good source for free horse manure now. I still buy some Black Hen (Black Kow's chicken derived compatriot) for an extra nitrogen boost if needed. I don't know any chicken farmers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 06:07 PM

Quite so. Especiall when you need good bait.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 04:13 PM

Did anyone ever notice the glory and miracle of worms? I mean plain old earthworms and angleworms, not those fancy flatworms or planaria.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 03:57 PM

350 lbs for $10?

It's $4.50 for a twenty pound bag around here!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 02:55 PM

There's no question that Rapaire qualifies; his BS is among the best to be found when not sought in any corner ofthe cyber-universe, at least around Mom's place.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 02:45 PM

Good bullshit at a cheap price. Not every day you find that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 02:35 PM

If Rapaire is out of print, maybe Max can obtain the publishing rights for $1.00, contract with some cut-rate printer in Thailand to have copies produced at a net cost of 25˘ each, and sell them to other Mudcatters for $10.00 a pop....

Aw, nevermind... Who'd pay $10.00 for a copy of Rapaire? Heck, you can get 350 pounds (seven 50# bags) of cow manure for $10.00 at Home Depot and you don't even have to wait for it to finish composting!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 02:31 PM

Amos, the fact that it is an assertion is true. Whether the content is truthful is another matter.

(We philosphers and Presidents like to split hares.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 02:00 PM

The existence of a book, asserting something, is not prima facie, evidence that it is a true assertion.

You've never heard of a book called The Protocols of the Elders of Zion, or a book called Guilty: Liberal Victims and Their Assault on America, I take it? Or, how about The Olde Testamente???


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 01:54 PM

So am I. I'm completely out of print. Even my printing press is out of print. I had to borrow the print for this posting.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 01:08 PM

Most of the revisions of that book are out of print.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 12:48 PM

You've never heard of the book "Our Bodies, Ourselves" have you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 12:08 PM

I think the semantic equivalence between "self" and "body" may be the fundamental bug in your system, there, old pal. There are a good many important differences. WHile the two are important system components and may be concatenated, they should not be confabulated.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 11:52 AM

Considering that the Republicans have inhabited San Diego from before the last Ice Age to the present I think that Amos would have first-hand knowledge of that.

I, myself, me, am apolitical. I work only for the Greatest Good For the Greatest Number, as my hero Jeremy Bentham taught. If I grow up I want to be just like him -- stuffed and kept in a cabinet at University College London. That's because the nuns who taught me in grade school said that my body was a Pure Temple and I could give no higher gift than myself and so I should "save myself for marriage" but I asked my wife and she said she doesn't want me around after I die (if I do).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 09:27 AM

Well, when all other possibilities are ruled out, consider the improbable.

Or consider creating a better memory. You could have that most paradoxical of elements, a solipsist's memory bank, complete with a full record of all the creations of everyone and everything that bothers you. What power!! As any Republican knows, it is much more interesting, sportsmanlike and valuable to modify the pictures recording an event than to try and manage the event itself.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 09:17 AM

I don't remember creating Max, but I must have. There is no other explanation.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 01:09 AM

No. Because he blinked.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 24 Feb 09 - 12:01 AM

Nite nite, Mom. Sweet dreams. I've brought you an extra blanket as it is going to be a bit more chilly tonight.

If Max is the only poster to all of Mudcat, does that make him the Father of all BS?

Would it be accurate to say we are all his fault?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 04:39 PM

And this year's Academey "Astaire Award" for the most impressive tap-dancing for no good reason goes to.....the envelope, please...(loud ripping sound)....that was NOT me, folks. I think it was the librarian...




A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 04:33 PM

I knew you'd say that. Winona Ryder and William Shatner..."together"...I told you about disgusting....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 04:07 PM

Humph. I am not impressed by your pathetic attempts at evasion. I am going to cease worshipping you and go back to Winona Ryder and William Shatner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 04:06 PM

And our/your subconscious lies to you/us all the time, so which of us/you are you/we suppossed to believe when we/you disagree about what you/we/they have done?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 03:45 PM

No. It's too damned disgusting and you should be ashamed (as should my unconscious). Go to confession before you die, in your dirty underwear, by being hit by a streetcar or something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 03:39 PM

Okay, now tell me what I did in the past half hour, Rapaire. In full detail. I expect proof of your omniscience.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 02:27 PM

Childhood's End. Teilhard de Chardin's Omega Point. McLuhan's Global Village.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 01:43 PM

Sometimes that's the only person who will offer an intelligent answer.

But it is, I think, both telling and appropriate that the Mother Of BS is the one place where we should raise seriously the question of how real we-all truly are, and to whom, and in what way.

To a large degree this is the Key Question and the guiding Pole Star behind all our discussion: is we I? Or is I we? Or both? The desire to know how this works is surely the generating force behind all True BS.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 12:56 PM

Yes. Be sure to thoroughly wash your hands afterward.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 12:52 PM

Ah. And do you know what I am about to do now? Do you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 12:51 PM

I don't know and I don't care to know, mostly because you are all creature I created. I knew Janie was going to say that because I willed her to do so.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 12:39 PM

Yes, "the circle is small". Why not tell us all and then all of us will know?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 12:33 PM

Actually, MMario, you are speaking to yourself although the delusional nature of your disorder leads you to believe you are speaking to yourselves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 10:55 AM

Verbatim transcript of a recent conversation with my wife:

Wife: "I thought I heard you talking with someone."

Me: "No, I must have been talking to myself."

Wife: " Oh. Well excuse me for interrupting."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 10:47 AM

Or am I talking to myself?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 10:46 AM

Are you speaking for me?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 09:31 AM

I usually do. FANTASTIC conversationalist!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 09:20 AM

So, aside from a few visitors, such as Janie and .....well, Janie; we're just talking to ourselves?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 08:59 AM

Southern California, home of Los Angeles and Hollywood, is civilization??????????


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 08:38 AM

How can you speak with such authority, Mister Hawk, when you haven't even visited civilization for a decade?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Feb 09 - 12:03 AM

Amos is terrific at engaging in a petulant frenzy, Janie. He surpasses most people in that regard, and that is why he does it. You have to play your strong suit if you expect to go far in this life. Most people who live near Amos feel that he hasn't gone far enough yet, though...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Feb 09 - 11:28 PM

We are WE--my kids helped choose the fabric.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 22 Feb 09 - 10:55 PM

Hmmmm.

Tell me more....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Feb 09 - 10:35 PM

Your diagnosis is interesting, Janie, but I don't believe it goes far enough. It's entirely possible that there is only one actual human being who posts to the Mudcat at all. That person is Max. All other "posters" are AI constructs who've taken on "personalities" based entirely upon characters in Terry Pratchet's "Discworld" books. Have you not noticed that Amos has a startling number of personality traits in common with Rincewind the inept sorcerer? Rapaire is, of course, the Librarian ("Ook!), while I seem to channel the personality of the Luggage. Perhaps that's why you weren't able to pigeonhole my personality in your analysis. All the others imagine themselves to be "human" while I see myself as an antisocial steamer trunk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 09 - 10:35 PM

Please note Stilly's use of the "First Person Imperial", also known as the "Imperial 'We'".

During my research I found that both Emperors and Emperesses used to wee. Frederick Barbarossa, for example, used to wee. The Empress Xiaowen would wee, as would Queen "Wee are not amused" Victoria (often while thinking of the song "John Brown's Body"). Catherine the Great of Russia would wee, sometimes while sitting on the "throne."

I have thoroughly researched this and other topics. For a complete list please send a SASE and US $15.95 to cover shipping and handling. If you order NOW (oops! too late!) you can get two lists for the price on one! Remember: it chops, it slices, it dices, it ruins your clothes!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Feb 09 - 10:15 PM

I think Janie figured out that I was Leo's Secret Santa one year. It all comes out in the end, doesn't it? (We sent him a home-made courduroy and flannel comforter, for the couch or travel. Since we don't knit or crotchet, we had to bring the sewing machine to the task.)


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