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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Bee-dubya-ell 22 Feb 07 - 11:59 PM
Amos 22 Feb 07 - 11:41 PM
Rapparee 22 Feb 07 - 10:11 PM
Acme 22 Feb 07 - 10:09 PM
Acme 22 Feb 07 - 10:07 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Feb 07 - 09:44 PM
Rapparee 22 Feb 07 - 09:32 PM
Acme 22 Feb 07 - 06:58 PM
MMario 22 Feb 07 - 04:22 PM
MMario 22 Feb 07 - 03:24 PM
Rapparee 22 Feb 07 - 03:09 PM
Bunnahabhain 22 Feb 07 - 01:01 PM
Little Hawk 22 Feb 07 - 12:44 PM
GUEST,The Giant Squid 22 Feb 07 - 11:51 AM
Acme 22 Feb 07 - 11:41 AM
Rapparee 22 Feb 07 - 08:55 AM
MMario 22 Feb 07 - 08:49 AM
Rapparee 22 Feb 07 - 08:46 AM
MMario 22 Feb 07 - 08:41 AM
Amos 22 Feb 07 - 08:41 AM
Liz the Squeak 22 Feb 07 - 03:24 AM
Donuel 22 Feb 07 - 02:37 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Feb 07 - 01:22 AM
Little Hawk 22 Feb 07 - 12:08 AM
Rapparee 21 Feb 07 - 09:36 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Feb 07 - 09:15 PM
Acme 21 Feb 07 - 08:51 PM
Amos 21 Feb 07 - 08:15 PM
Little Hawk 21 Feb 07 - 07:20 PM
Amos 21 Feb 07 - 07:16 PM
Rapparee 21 Feb 07 - 04:48 PM
MMario 21 Feb 07 - 01:26 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Feb 07 - 01:25 PM
Amos 21 Feb 07 - 12:55 PM
MMario 21 Feb 07 - 12:15 PM
Rapparee 21 Feb 07 - 12:12 PM
Amos 21 Feb 07 - 09:43 AM
Bunnahabhain 21 Feb 07 - 08:33 AM
Rapparee 21 Feb 07 - 08:04 AM
Amos 20 Feb 07 - 10:57 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 20 Feb 07 - 10:51 PM
Rapparee 20 Feb 07 - 10:14 PM
Amos 20 Feb 07 - 06:27 PM
Rapparee 20 Feb 07 - 05:28 PM
Amos 20 Feb 07 - 02:36 PM
Rapparee 20 Feb 07 - 02:06 PM
Amos 20 Feb 07 - 01:26 PM
Bunnahabhain 20 Feb 07 - 11:08 AM
Acme 20 Feb 07 - 10:29 AM
Amos 20 Feb 07 - 10:06 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 11:59 PM

Now, now, Amos! Mom's going to be upset with you! You know the rule:

"At least three totally spurious answers to all etymological questions must be presented before consulting the Online Etymology Dictionary for the so-called 'real' etymology."

See if you can talk Gluon into moving your post a few hours into the future while we make up a bit more BS.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 11:41 PM

LIfe with Rapaire certainly has its Upson Downs. He not only plagiarizes copyrighted language, he takes that which is public fare and butchers it.

Downs are rolling hills, as anyone with an etymological dictionary know. Now the odd thing is that the English, who coined the term, are more confused than the Australians about its meaning. Compare the following:

A downland is an area of open chalk upland. This term is especially used to describe the chalk countryside in southern England. Areas of downland are often referred to as Downs.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Downs

Extensive undulating and gently rolling plains.
www.nationalparks.nsw.gov.au/npws.nsf/Content/bioregions_glossary

As for etymology:

down (n.2)
O.E. dun "hill," from Celtic word for "hill, citadel" (cf. O.Ir. dun "hill, hill fort," and second element in place names London, Verdun, etc.), from PIE base *dheue- "to close, finish, come full circle" (cf. O.E. dun "hill," M.Du. dune "sandy hill"). Meaning "elevated rolling grassland" is from 1297.

A.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 10:11 PM

Race courses used to be stuffed with fluffy goose feathers so that if the horses fell down they wouldn't get hurt. That's why they were called "Downs." But it was found that the jockeys got too comfortable laying there and that they were making the horses deliberately fall so that they could catch a bit of a nap. So they did away with the stuffing and ran the races on plain old dirt. But the name, "Downs," stuck.

By the way, the drink of which the losers partook was called the "Downs Comforter."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 10:09 PM

Q *How do I make that assumption when we've never met?

A *Because the average life expectancy in Down's Syndrome is about 35 years, and we know you're way older than that. . . (but it takes one to know one, so to speak. . .)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 10:07 PM

I know you don't have Down's Syndrome, BWL, so it must be something else that sparks this question.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 09:44 PM

If you decide to go to the horse races while you're in Tampa, say "Hi" to my stepson. He lives not too far from Tampa Downs.

Which brings us to the question of why are so many horse racing tracks called "______ Downs?" What the hell's a "down"? Is it because the horses fall down? But if they all fall down, nobody wins the race! They should call them "Ups". The Kentucky Derby should be run at "Churchill Ups".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 09:32 PM

I was in Tampa once. The cops were looking for a guy who shot up a hospital when I was there -- helicopters and police boats and all sorts of whoop-te-doo.

And all the while there was a guy playing the bagpipes, standing in the garden level of the hotel, above us who were drinking down below.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 06:58 PM

Don't fall in while you're in Tampa.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 04:22 PM

MOM - I'm gonna be out of town for a few days - traveling to the Tampa vicinity for my Dad's 90th b-day party. So if anyone asks - I'm not here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 03:24 PM

You would think an Honor Guard would be adept at "falling in" - isn't that the first step in any kind of (non geological) formation?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 03:09 PM

I have just returned from the ground breaking ceremonies for the Old Town Pocatello Pavilion. Quite nice, and the Idaho Legion's Color Honor Guard showed up and neither of them fell flat on their face for a change. Last time they showed up for something like this it was at the opening of the new Sewage Treatment Plant and yes, you guessed it -- both of them missed falling in. They landed on the edge of one of the CEment ponds and suffered a bloody nose and a chipped tooth, respectively.

It's amazing to everyone that two guys that are so maladroit can do so much damage to themselves and never even nick or dent the weapons they carry. Of course, it IS hard to damage an old broom handle.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 01:01 PM

You could just drop one of the Legions special cigars in the pail of paint. You know, the ones all three parts of the AFT tried to confiscate at once, and they're still in therapy as a result. It'll cover the ceiling quite effectively, and a few shrapnel scars on the walls just add to the look.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 12:44 PM

You could hire Shane to repaint it in the color of your choice, Rapaire. He occasionally takes on casual labor when he's truly desperate for cash.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,The Giant Squid
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 11:51 AM

Did you people see what they did to my cousin Abner? Did ya? Aunt Lucille is gonna be pissed off, lemme tell ya!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 11:41 AM

I think we have one floor of our library with an aubergine elevator core. The rest of the floor is a normal UTA beige. In this they mistakenly painted it the colors of a rival university (TCU- Texas Christian Ubargine).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 08:55 AM

Because they only put ceiling panels on about 1/4 or less of the ceiling. This was to cut costs. Yes, it's a Purple Hole for light, and we have to heat the area as well put up with much more noise. Granted, it's a snap for running cables, but that's about it.

When the city built the place they did lots of things like that to cut costs. Now, 13 years later, we're going to have to pay for it -- a higher costs.

And even though the plaque says, "Built at no cost to the taxpayers" the city won't stop writing checks on the construction of the building until 2011.

A long, dirty, sordid, story of local politics....

And so we have an aubergine ceiling, painted that color to disguise the beams, ducts, and other structural elements and sold as an architectural style that I think is called either "Defunct Warehouse" or "Early Industrial Plant."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 08:49 AM

why would they do that? Doesn't it suck up light something awful? I mean, the colour aubergine sucks light the way eggplants suck up oil when you cook them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 08:46 AM

The ceiling of my Library (both floors) is painted aubergine.

Really.

It's awful.

Any assistance in correcting this would be appreciated.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 08:41 AM

There'll be aubergines over the white ckiffs of Dover
when we come marching home to you....


"When the aubergines return to Capistrano"

"May the Aubergine of Happiness fly in your window"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 08:41 AM

Why we're becoming a veritable NEST of improbabilities here, aren't we? It's the credibility gradient I mentioned before -- it is becomig bolloxed up by the shift of key paradigmatic premises and is reallu aubergining up the normal patterns of time so they start going hay-wire on us.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 03:24 AM

16300!!

Whoo hooo!

LTS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 02:37 AM

I have a Schodingers cat litter box.
It kills oders dead, sometimes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 01:22 AM

Oh my darlin', Oh my darlin'
Oh my darlin' Aubergine
You're the hue of torpid liver
That's saute'd in kerosene


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Feb 07 - 12:08 AM

Could someone PM me when the aubergine thing has run its course?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 09:36 PM

Heard here in the Old West:

Marshal! Black Bart has done shot the Sheriff in the aubergine!

Aubergine, bartender! And set 'em up for the house!

The aubergines pass slowly by, Lorena,
The dew is on the leaves again....

...a cloud of dust and a hearty, "Hiho, Aubergine!"....

Well, Miss Mary, I think you're about as purty as a brand-new aubergine....

Oh give me a home
Where the aubergines roam....

Don't go out there, Marshal! Ringo's got a sawed-off aubergine!

Hey, Slim! Sing "Little Joe the Aubergine", would ya?

If you kin break him he's yers, but them wild aubergines are tough critters.

Colonel Custer! Colonel Custer! We're nearly out of aubergines!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 09:15 PM

Did you know that aubergine leaves are the Japanese Potato Beetle's favorite food? Japanese Potato Beetles will feed on the leaves of any plant in the nightshade family (tomatoes, peppers, potatoes, eggplant) but they'll always hit the eggplant first. Some gardeners plant a few aubergines as a "trap crop", even if they don't like to eat 'em. Just check the plants every day and if they're being chewed on you can pick the 'taterbugs off and squash 'em before they start eatin' anything else.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 08:51 PM

I'll be there with l'aubergine on just doesn't have the right, er, ring to it, does it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 08:15 PM

ANother good title for a book: "Get a Life, Aubergine!". Plus, "Get An Aubergine!" amd "Son of Aubergine". And, "For Whom the Aubergine Tolls", "The Bells of Aubergine" and "The Old Aubergine and the Sea".

See what I mean? This irresponsible decision by scientists has undermined our whole cultural paradigm and riddled it with holes which are being filled by a slowly expanding Meme of Aubergine...a good title for a book, by the way. Quantum uncertainties are torquing our entire memetic Eigenstate out of whack!!!! Gahhhhh!! Aubergine!!





A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 07:20 PM

I certainly hope, Rapaire, that you have at least one copy of "Get A Life!" in your library.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 07:16 PM

There are no zombies in his box, Rapaire. Just the cat that became an aubergine. A good name for yet another book to add to your towering stacks.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 04:48 PM

Are vampire and zombies, the Undead, simply those who are in an unopened Schroedinger's box?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 01:26 PM

NONONONO! we want them to open the box as often as possible - sooner or later we have to get lucky and he will be dead!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 01:25 PM

The aubergine has been saved! The physicists have decided to replace Schrödinger's cat with William Shatner!

Yes, "Schrödinger's Cat" will become "Schrödinger's Shat"!

Now we just have to convince them to never open the box!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 12:55 PM

Actually, Gluon got lured into a Dianetics storefront and was given a free personality test. The results were very depressing to him -- his traits on EVERY SINGLE CHARACTERISTIC the test measured were ambiguous. IMagine! QUARK!

As a result, he spent several hours in uncertain misery, made a whole series of life-changing ambivalent decisions or not, and ended up running off to the Papaya Islands with Schrodinger's aubergine, which quite pissed the old man off. It is not that aubergines are prohibitvely expensive, but he'd had a lot of timespace invested in gettingthis one trained up/down/sideways. But really it serves Schrodinger right...after all, as ye reap, so ye shall so what, and all that. I think....

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 12:15 PM

that the average translational kinetic energy possessed by free particles given by equipartition of energy what?

This doesn't appear to be a complete thought - even for a question.

Or is Gluon chasing Schrodinger's aubergine again?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 12:12 PM

Then how do you explain that the average translational kinetic energy possessed by free particles given by equipartition of energy?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 09:43 AM

These are not ordinary Spaghetti-O's, Rapaire. They are the sort of thing only a cosmic mathematician could dream up after overeating. In essence they are a locus of high improbability surrounded by a series of Eigen-vector points defining a series of higher probabilities, whose form is maintained by the credibility-tensions formed between the center and the perimeter. The radius represents a gradient of unlikelihood, which also implies the centers are not likely very good. I suspect Gluon's tastes have become too refined for such scraps, yet they may prove to be the core to understanding n-dimensional space and its proclivity for spawning unnecesarily complex universes. For example, there's one around "here", somewhere, which is ridiculous.

It even has its own self-styled Spaghetti-O monster.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 08:33 AM

Well, if he does try to eat them, we'll end up with a slightly bitty theory of slightly battered and very tangled stringy type thing, which although losing it's snappy title, is probably more accurate....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 07 - 08:04 AM

Wouldn't the Grand Unified Theory of Spaghettios be an example of circular reasoning? And wouldn't Gluon simply eat them?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 10:57 PM

I take it that last figure is you, offering gestures of friendship into the air?


As for Schrodinger's Aubergine, I am convinced it will fundamentally undermine the entire field of quantum mechanics, by subtly corroding the deep assumptions behind the uncertainty paradigm. I will not be surprised, once this viral meme spreads its toxins about a bit, to hear that string theory has become The Grand Unified Theory of Spaghetti-Os.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 10:51 PM

In response to a series of threats of violent action from the animal rights group PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals), physics departments at major universities throughout North America and Europe have agreed to stop teaching the well-known quantum physics thought experiment known as "Schrödinger's Cat". It will be replaced by a more animal-friendly experiment such as "Schrödinger's Eggplant" or, possibly, "Schrödinger's Mung Bean Sprouts".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 10:14 PM

                              Sophisticated people are friends of mine, Amos.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 06:27 PM

Jeeze, is he ever gonna get his meds right?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 05:28 PM

Ev'rybody's building the big ships and the boats,
Some are building monuments,
Others, jotting down notes,
Ev'rybody's in despair,
Ev'ry girl and boy
But when Rapaire done gets here,
Ev'rybody's gonna jump for joy.
Come all without, come all within,
You'll not see nothing like that mighty man....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 02:36 PM

"This episode of Ben-Sesame street with all its wonderful orange and yellow explosions and its bright red blood is brought to you by the fictitious letters W, M and D, Ensh'alla! and, thanks be to God, the number 3,651! And remember, kids, don't thank me, thank Allah!! So long from ben-Kermit, Tally Boid, and Miss Beefy. S'allam'aleikum!!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 02:06 PM

Watchoo got agin the letters "M" and "D", boy? You want I should come down there and teach you about "M" and "D"? Them's my initials. I don't go 'round saying things like, "Well, better than the letter A and J" (even though those are my nephew-the-geek's first two initials).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 01:26 PM

Better than using the letters W, M, and D to sponsor an episode of ben-Sesame Street. :)


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 11:08 AM

This week, he's reading Peter Pan, translated into old English. He'll be up for a Rory for the most gratuitous use of the letter Yog against innocent people...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 10:29 AM

In the context of children's story hour?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 07 - 10:06 AM

For purposes of debate, I hypothetically aver that association with the evanescent effluvium of hyper-space potentialities and counter-probabilities known as Gluon-the-duck-dog, if extended overlong, can bring about massive Delusions of Grandeur, Creeping Creep Megalomania, Terminal Narcissism, and Pathological Solipsistic Revery on the part of the associate so exposed.

Discuss.


A


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