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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 03 Jul 06 - 08:30 AM
Acme 03 Jul 06 - 12:14 AM
Amos 02 Jul 06 - 10:42 PM
Amos 02 Jul 06 - 10:08 PM
Rapparee 02 Jul 06 - 08:42 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 02 Jul 06 - 08:15 PM
Amos 02 Jul 06 - 07:04 PM
Bunnahabhain 02 Jul 06 - 03:56 PM
Acme 02 Jul 06 - 10:18 AM
Rustic Rebel 02 Jul 06 - 02:55 AM
Acme 01 Jul 06 - 10:56 PM
Amos 01 Jul 06 - 01:54 PM
Acme 01 Jul 06 - 01:13 PM
Amos 01 Jul 06 - 12:50 PM
Bunnahabhain 01 Jul 06 - 10:17 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 01 Jul 06 - 09:39 AM
Bunnahabhain 01 Jul 06 - 05:01 AM
Rustic Rebel 01 Jul 06 - 03:02 AM
Amos 01 Jul 06 - 02:23 AM
Amos 30 Jun 06 - 10:31 PM
Amos 30 Jun 06 - 09:23 PM
Bunnahabhain 30 Jun 06 - 04:06 PM
MMario 30 Jun 06 - 03:20 PM
frogprince 30 Jun 06 - 03:12 PM
Acme 30 Jun 06 - 03:04 PM
Acme 30 Jun 06 - 03:03 PM
Bunnahabhain 30 Jun 06 - 02:57 PM
Rapparee 30 Jun 06 - 10:55 AM
Amos 30 Jun 06 - 07:53 AM
Bunnahabhain 30 Jun 06 - 07:44 AM
Bunnahabhain 30 Jun 06 - 07:10 AM
Rustic Rebel 30 Jun 06 - 01:24 AM
Rustic Rebel 30 Jun 06 - 01:20 AM
Acme 30 Jun 06 - 12:01 AM
frogprince 29 Jun 06 - 10:19 PM
MMario 29 Jun 06 - 10:07 PM
Amos 29 Jun 06 - 03:27 PM
Bunnahabhain 29 Jun 06 - 11:53 AM
Amos 29 Jun 06 - 11:30 AM
MMario 29 Jun 06 - 11:09 AM
Acme 29 Jun 06 - 11:02 AM
Rapparee 29 Jun 06 - 10:42 AM
Rapparee 29 Jun 06 - 08:05 AM
Acme 28 Jun 06 - 11:42 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 28 Jun 06 - 11:17 PM
Acme 28 Jun 06 - 10:41 PM
Rapparee 28 Jun 06 - 10:23 PM
Amos 28 Jun 06 - 09:57 PM
Rapparee 28 Jun 06 - 09:35 PM
Bunnahabhain 28 Jun 06 - 06:14 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 08:30 AM

When I told her, Pat's first words were a heartfelt "Thank God!" After 28 days in the intensive/enhanced care, with tubes down his throat, with a "central line" moved every few days from one vein to another, with very little "real" food (and that was applesauce), with bedsores developing, with the prospect of three months of rehab in front of him, yes, he's at peace now.

Pat's in DC, I'm in Pocatello and I'll be flying out in a couple days.

Things are better this way, really. The only problem is that the burial and the funeral service will be temporally distant from each other because Arlington NC has such a backlog due to the hundred of other WW2 vets dying. And by the way, he's eligible (and Pat will ensure that he has) the riderless horse, the caisson, an 18-gun salute, and so on.

I've got a lot to do before I fly out. I'll know more this morning, I hope.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Jul 06 - 12:14 AM

It's a tough time, and the airlines don't make it any easier with their humongous "bereavement" fare that is half of the highest price they can manage for a seat. I bounced around the U.S. in shock on a three-legged journey the day after I learned of my father's death. The flight crew knows who you are--aside from the deer-in-the-headlights look, if you make any eye contact at all, you're the one not talking to your seat mate, if you have one.

I met a marvelous man on my flight to Seattle when I learned of my mother's critical condition. I was seated in those odd front row seats on a Southwest flight so my row was knee-to-knee with three folks riding backwards. At a lull in the conversation I asked one of the locals for directions to Virginia Mason Hospital, and after ascertaining the reason for my visit this guy, who was apparently a local entrepreneur and inventor, who knows, maybe he's one of Bill Gate's friends or lackeys (it sounded like), proceeded to smoothly shift the conversation into the wonders of inventions. It may sound like it was a self-centered conversation, but it wasn't at all. His goal was to keep all of us talking and clearly, to keep me thinking about other things. I still think back very fondly to that flight and am one who can say I have truly encountered the kindness of strangers.

Give Pat a big hug, and one for you, too. Mike. It's going to be hard on you, also.

Maggie


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 10:42 PM

13072 posts
_____________

262 Display Pages

==> 49.89 posts per page, on average.

There JUST happens to be a complete row of pages on the table at this moment.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 10:08 PM

Please give Pat my condolences and give her all the support in the world. This is a rough, rough passage for every woman I have known who had to go through it, no matter how readied they tried to be for it.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 08:42 PM

Sorry to interject a sad note, but I'll be off to DC this week, probably Thursday. My father-in-law died this morning around 10 a.m. EDT. Pat's on the plane now, and I'll be off when more is known.

Yes, Dinosaur is wonderful. There's a whole cliff full of bones and a big sign out front reading "NO Duckdogs!" I suspect Gluon has been seen there.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 08:15 PM

While I agree that from a purely written standpoint "13131" is a more ideal numeric palindrome than "13031", it just doesn't play from the spoken-word perspective. Say each number out loud: "one-three-one-three-one" and "one-three-oh-three-one". If you had to walk around saying one or the other all day long, which would it be?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 07:04 PM

She rides a turtle, in the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that's best of left and right
Meet in her tortoise's rheumy eyes:
Thus mellow'd to that tender light
Which those inside their shells deny.

But one shade more, but one ray less,
Had half impair'd the nameless grace
Which balances on the tortoise broad,
Or lightens soft his wrinkly face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet do cry,
Oh! Let me bite, just once, her thigh.

And on that beak, and shelly brow
So hard, so calm, yet aged in time,
The smiles that win, the eyes which beg,
But tell of days in hard restraint,
A mind which yearns to bite the leg,
Of an angel, light and innocent!

Moonglow Shelley Tannenbaum
Washington Square Remembered
Puget Sound Chapbooks, Portland, 1971


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 03:56 PM

But you can always jump off a turtle onto a low hanging tree branch. Bet that wouldn't do you so much good with a tiger....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 10:18 AM

Did it bite off chunks of your body while you rode? Riding a snapping turtle sounds as precarious as riding a tiger--really difficult to dismount. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 02 Jul 06 - 02:55 AM

Well I too, hade a similar experience today.

I was walking down the highway, high humidity, high fog, extremely wet night,
and I walked right on top of an old 5' snapper.
It waved it's head up and me and said
"Do you want a ride?"
I said, "yes, thank-you."
It took me just where I needed to go.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 10:56 PM

Under the circumstances, irritability is entirely understandable!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 01:54 PM

Well, Mag, I had a similar sort of moment Friday standing in the parking lot at Home Depot.

All of a sudden one of the cars backed out of its spot and into me.

By the grace of magic and divine balance, he was going slowly enough that I was able to leap to one side and slap his left fender quite hard before anything broke and kept my feet. But it was a very startling moment, transitioning from looking over a parking lot to "OH, now I am being hit by a moving car..." and leaping aside and hollering... The driver, a young man with a blank sort of stupid look on his face said, "Oh, I'm sorry, man. I didn't see you." This made me feel much better, at least better than I would have felt if I thought he had done it while seeing me.

Despite the fact that one inch of accelerator depression could have made the difference between a near-miss and a smashed leg, he seemed relatively non-plussed by things. A nearby couple asked me a few minutes later if I was all right, having watched the whole thing.

I was glad I had managed to nip out of the way in response to that first moment of impact, but I was pretty pissed off at the guy and felt grumpy for half an hour or more afterwards.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 01:13 PM

Well Mom, I'm okay, but I fell down this morning when I was walking the dogs. Poppy was being a bit of a poop today and when I was switching hands and repositioning them around on their leashes she slowed down and I tripped on her. Didn't get hurt, but felt pretty stupid sitting there in Don and Addy's driveway. Cinnamon immediately lay down, like a good girl, and Poppy emoted "Oh, look, you're down where I can jump on you and lick your face and smear your glasses." We picked ourselves up and dusted ourselves off and a neighbor slowly drove up the street and asked if I was okay--he'd been down the road and had seen me topple over in his rear view mirror. [Sigh] I told him thanks, I was okay, but I wish he hadn't seen that. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 12:50 PM

The term "trailer" comes from their having originally been shown at the end of a film programme. Although that practice did not last long, due to patrons tending to leave the theater after the films proper were finished, the name has stuck. ...

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trailer_(movie)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 10:17 AM

Ahh BWL, a nice easy question. The trailers do come after the film. It's just someone is running the Universe backwards. I think the the tape got droppped, and coiled it back up from the wrong end.

Now, I must go and find some way to deal with the heat wave. It's pushing 80, and is just too hot.....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 09:39 AM

Hi, Mom! Tell me something... Why do they call movie previews "trailers"? Isn't a trailer something that comes after something else? So shouldn't a movie trailer come after the real movie? And if it did, would anybody ever watch it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 05:01 AM

Well Amos, what is one expected to be doing at 2am? As fun as the options of gallivanting or tomcatting or snickerdoodling or famcypantsing or hot-footing or two-stepping, sound, we all must sleep sometime.

I too shall be neglecting Mom later, as I shall be forcibly seperated fromt the computer, unless I can distract her with sufficient fruit and chocolate.

RR, they are pretty greenhouses, aren't they. Britian is good at them, as they're needed to grow many interesting things here. This place was when they started to go over the top...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 03:02 AM

Bunn: that sure was some purrdy, shapely, pearly, floaty, mirrory, pinkishy, velvety, plasticy, lumpy, roundishy, moundishly kind of terrain.
I think I was there once, in a dream.


PS When Kandu 'wounded' me, (poor little wounded one) and made me to believe I only talked about human wetness and it's ability to moisten, I surrendered unto the King. Therefore, my last post to this thread, when ever that will be, will definitely rust your computers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Jul 06 - 02:23 AM

Well, Mom, it looks like it's you and me. The rest are gallivantingor tomcatting or snickerdoodling or famcypantsing or hot-footing or two-stepping or whatever all those loose, immoral children of yours do when they're not here waking care of their Mom.

Want some green tea? Crumpet? Shall I bring you your shawl?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 10:31 PM

Besides, he's always putting out all that excess charm which sticks to his coat. I guess life as a DuckDog has its up and down, but the charm makes it worthwhile.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 09:23 PM

What's important, as BWL pointed out so eleoquently is that Gluon knows perfectly well both where and when he is, and how fast he is going. He's remarkable that way.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 04:06 PM

Well, Gluon does tend to escape a little, or at least delocalise all over the place round here. We may be the home of the only duck-dog, but where that creature actually is most of the time is another question.....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 03:20 PM

well PRince O'frogs; let us tell you this:

When you read the MOAB your waste of time is not only about quantity, it is about QUALITY.

That's correct, you probably can't find a better thread on which to waste massive amounts of time then right here at the MOAB.

Besides which, we have the only duckdogs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: frogprince
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 03:12 PM

I usta try to see what was goin' on on this thing, along when the 'cat was constantly trying to decide whether to run slowly and erratically or just plain quit for a day. I usually gave up trying to get the thread open, and I extabilished a habit of not trying. Don't know that I'll ever try to read the whole thing; I waste too much of my life around here already.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 03:04 PM

Sorry--that was to Bunn. I'd moved forward to the preview screen and couldn't go back to see who made the first remark.

Never mind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 03:03 PM

Oooo--I had the most amazing experience at Dinosaur in the Utah section of the park. I drove off of the highway (following a park road, not X-country!) and up onto a plateau for lunch. It was a lovely clear day, I was alone, with my cat, on my way from Texas to Washington. I opened the cooler and got out my lunch fixings, and my ears were positively ringing--the silence was so amazing. No wind, no birds, no traffic or people or squirrels--nothing. I have only heard such complete silence out of doors a couple of times, and found it incredibly powerful.

Amos--Noel Coward was more likely distracted by a pretty boy or two, don't you think?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 02:57 PM

Now that is an impressive use for a quarry. This one isn't bad either...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 10:55 AM

1585? 1585? Wimp! Within a few hours I'm off to the Juraisic and earlier!!! Pat and I, off to the land of T. Rex and Utahraptor...how romantic!

Be back on the 4th, after I drop her off at the SLC airport.

Mom, be as good as it's possible to be until I get back, okay? And call Amos if you need to...he's got the bail money.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 07:53 AM

Well, ECKshwally, old fruit, I thought her lengwidge was RAWthuh, ummmmmm, GOOD, comparatively speaking. And, as far as THAT goes, really, I rahthuh think there really isw no other way TO speak, wouldn't you say?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 07:44 AM

I knew there was something amiss. I really should have said it was Rustic rebel I was asking about Gluon....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 07:10 AM

Do you know what Gluon does to those people who keep on using Bad Language? Do you? Well, if you do, would you mind awfully letting all of us know, as we've been wondering, there's a good chap.

You see, all this uncertainty stuff hanging around that creature means we either know what happens, or when, and as it's all written down in here somewhere, the when is fixed, you see, so we can't actually ever know.

You, you useful fellow, on the other hand probably haven't finished reading back that far, so you don't know when, so you might be able to tell us what happens.

I have a feeling this inclination of mine to adopt a writing style somewhat reminiscient of Noel Coward on an off day may arise from that creature, but whenever I think about it too hard, I have this feeling that just will not lerave me alone, unless I distract it with a bottle of champagne and a pretty girl or two.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 01:24 AM

PS-Fuck the typos and get on with it::yeah?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 01:20 AM

More interesting? What should that be?
A visit from the interesting tree?
Or perhaps a floundering mackeral by the sea.
It doesn't matter much to me
As long as we will all agree
that intrest is in the eye of the spatula,
and it's flippin'::
wettness that comes from the inner sanction of the utmost personal part of my vaginal secretions that make my brain errupt with visions of naked men wearing bison hides and raccoon penis hair-pieces while vividly singing stories of past nakes bison wearing, raccoon penis drumming sticsk, by the moonlight, on a warm a sultry summer night lit up by a coleman lantern and laughing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Jun 06 - 12:01 AM

A new face, Mom! Look at that!

frogprince, are you up to speed here at MOAB? Did you read the thread from the very beginning? Or did you skip up to 9000 or so and just read the last 4000+?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: frogprince
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 10:19 PM

An "Arab Curse", actually the creation of a New York Italian sometime prior to 1970:

"May a herd of a thousand camels urinate in the womb of your beloved on the night of your bethrothel"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 10:07 PM

Evening, Mom. I'm up late, so you might as well be too!

Time travel to 1585 this weekend - see you when I get home.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 03:27 PM

Well, Bunn, if you're going to cop an attitude, and if those curses are so inconsequential, why, then, I wish them all on you! Just to pass the time away waiting for something more interesting to happen.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 11:53 AM

You call that a curse? I have all of those things happen most every week, and twice on Sundays. I remember the curses we used to have, so terrible that even thinking about them is more than most people can stand, and actually typing them out would be inviting the drowning of Mudcat central, or worse.

The Gods themselves drempt up these curses, after that incident. You know the one, the one that took the somewhat longer than the universe has existed for. All those things that come up in the classics, like having your liver torn out by an eagle for all eternity seem like light relief. The curse of 13031 is no curse, merely a string of petty annoyances!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 11:30 AM

Then there's the parallel universe of this Song Challenge in which the curses run in similar wise:

May his laws never pass, may the frost nip his ass,
In drastic depression may his businesses fail,
May his drafts always bounce, may his cats never pounce,
May the Council reject him and clap him in gaol!

May busloads of trippers, with mama's and nippers,
Come trample his dahlias , make his pacemaker click,
May a foreclosure lease cause the rapid decease
Of the monster who murdered my beautiful chick!

May his pecker stay limp and his wife be a blimp
And his son be a wimp with a cross-threaded dick
May his Sundays be stormy and overdraft warnings
Stack up on his doorstep in piles deep and thick.

May the tourist-trade swells with their antiquéd bells
Harass him to hell with a suit for lost trade
May his house lose its power, his watch lose an hour,.
His daughter her flower an' his soul lose its shade!

May his landlord be snide, and likewise his bride
And his best hand-grown roses blow up and away;
May his checks be rejected, his phone disconnected
And his dam'd PDA start to write en Francais.

May his groin spring a sprain, may his picnics all rain!
May his guilt like a lance burn a hole in his head
May he spavine his back and be tortured and racked
By hemorrhoid pain, as he lies in his bed.

May his friends borrow money, his jokes not be funny,
His dog turn a traitor, and leave him alone,
May his appetite jade, and his draperies fade,
May his wife turn to ice, and his mistress to stone!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 11:09 AM

13131 is more elegant.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 11:02 AM

Rap's right--I found some more small print regarding this event:

May his pig never grunt, may his cat never hunt,
May a ghost always haunt him in the dead of the night,
May his hen never lay, may his ass never bray,
May his coat fly away like an old paper kite;
May the lice and the fleas the wretch ever tease,
May the pinching north breeze make him tremble and shake,
May a four-year-old bug build a nest in the Iug,
Of the mudster that captured rare 13031-ake.
May his cock never crow, may his bellows ne'er blow,
And a-pot or po, may he never have one,
May his cradle not rock, may his box have no lock,
May his wife have no smock to shield her back bone,
May his duck never quack, and his goose turn quite black
And pull down the turf with his long yellow beak.
May scurvy and itch, not depart from the breech,
Of the monster that captured rare 13031-ake.

May his pipe never smoke, may his teapot be broke,
And to add to the joke may his kettle not boil,
May he lay in the bed 'till the moment he's dead
May he always be fed on lob-scouse and fish oil,
May he swell with the gout, may his grinders fall out,
May he roar, bawl and shout, with the horrid toothache.
May his temples wear horns, and all his toes corns,
The monster that captured rare 13031-ake.
May his spade never dig, may his sow never pig,
Every nit on his head be as large as a snall,
May his house have no thatch and his door have no latch,
Nay his turkey not hatch, may the rats eat his meal,
May every old fairy fiom Cork to Dunleary,
Dip him in snug and easy in some pond or lake,
Where the eel and the trout may slime in the snout,
Of the mudster that captured rare 13031-ake.

May his dog yelp and growl with hunger and cold,
May his wife always scold 'till his brain goes astray,
May the curse of each hag, that e'er carried a bag,
Alight on his nag till his beard it turns grey,
May monkeys still bite him, and man-apes affright him,
And everyone slight him asleep or awake,
May weasels still gnaw him, and jackdaws still claw him,
The mudster that captured rare 13031-ake.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 10:42 AM

* All of your passwords and cookies will disapper.
* Your souffles will always fall.
* Your dog will forget who you are.
* Suddenly, you will remember everything that you've tried to forget.
* You'll receive a message from God that says, "Ah, ya know, I've had to revoke your forgiveness. Clerical error. Sorry."
* You're going to get a draft notice and they won't accept excuses.
* Congratulations! The twins are fine! Does your wife know?

Yes, the Curse of 13031 is one of the bad ones. Hope you're ready.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 08:05 AM

Be very, very afraid. The Curse of 13031 has descended upon you. Here are a few things that will happen. This list is not inclusive and in no way can or should be construed as a complete list of what will happen, nor does it constitute a contract, either oral or written, express or implied. The Curse of 13031 is not responsible for any damage which may occur to either the cursed or anyone in the vicinity of the cursed, where vicinity includes (but is not limited to) the cursed continent of residency.

* your teeth will turn green and mossy.
* you will no longer be able to play the dobro.
* your picks will become blunted.
* your income tax return will be audited.
* none of your clothes will fit and you will attend church wrapped in a tablecloth.
* you will forget to install you upper plate when you meet the mayor.
* your spade will never dig.
* your sow will never pig.
* each hair of your wig will be well thrashed with the flail.
* faeries will dunk you in river and lake.
* you will experience the BSD.
* FUD will haunt you all your remaining days.
* you will enter "format C:" at the root DOS prompt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 11:42 PM

You lucky devil, you!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 11:17 PM

"13031" A most exquisite palindrome!

Don't just read it, say it out loud! "One-three-oh-three-one"! See what I mean?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 10:41 PM

I recognized it immediately, our late, lamented Superconducting Super Collider. Near Waxahatchie. Great idea, but then they sunk it. What short-sighted folks they were.

Must do laundry; Moonglow went to her first day of her first job today and now she needs to wash her DQ shirt for tomorrow. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 10:23 PM

Well, I hate to brag about Pocatello, but if you would really and truly like to mess with linear accelerators....

Let me know when you're coming and I'll see what music stuff is on.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 09:57 PM

I didn't mean the incomplete accelerator. I meant the one before that.

The Texas Goddess and I oncet had a conversation about that bizarre accelerator and the town that went with it...and I wrote her a choon on it...


G                                                                A
Well, I'd like to tell you buddy, 'bout a place called Boz,
D7                               G
Cutest little town that ever there was,
G                                       A
It had farms and a feedstore and a real pharmacy
A7                      D7                         G
And a drive in movie just for makin' free
B7                                           E7
It had one gas station and a funny old name
A7                      D7          G
A sweet little town on the plain.
                  G                         C                   D7
(Spoken: Nice place to raise up some kinda kids, yeah...)

Chorus:
G    E7                            Am
You can't get to Boz from here anymore
D7                                                       G
They tore down the schoolhouse and the corner drugstore
G             E7                                 Am
There's a twenty mile tunnel running underground
D7                                              G
And nothing but memory left of town
B7                                        E7
So don't bother asking for the town that was,

       A7                  D7         G
You can't get from here to Boz!

Now there ain't no explaining how some things come around,
The Feds put their attention on this little Texas town,
And they came and explained how they would help those folks along
With a supercollider that was twenty miles long!
A giant concrete tunnel underneath their farms
Where scientists would study all them bosons and charms!

(Spoken: "Yes, suh!! I'm from the gommint, an' I'm here to help ya!!"

Chorus

Now,the town fathers said it was a heck of a plan
And they voted it in to the very last man
They had Federal dollars flooding their dreams
And they came up with a thousand Super Collider schemes
They planned a Super Collider rib joint and a Super Collider Inn
And a Subatomic Lauindromat to wash yer socks in


(Spoken: Then they up an' built thet that Billion Dollar Boondoggle Bowling Lanes establishment!!)

Chorus

So the Feds built the tunnel and it's down there to this day
Underneath the long abandoned farms where folks moved away
It seems the first billiion all got spent on the plans
And the cost of that tunnel, well it got out of hand
And before those atoms started running in rings
The Feds put their thoughts onto other things

(Spoken: Like a new Super Computer Center, right outside of Penobscot, Maine)

Then the money dried up, and they'd filled in the wells,
And the real estate values started sliding toward hell,
And the three thousand scientists just moved away
And they all got jobs out in San Jose
And the cinema ands as station are dry as tombs
And the tunnel's full of green mushrooms!

(Spoken: So the Army stuidied out what they could learn from all this ya know. It taught 'em a thing or two. 'Bout the fine art of digging big ditches and fillin' 'em in again!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 09:35 PM

I know what it is! I know what it is!...and it's a damned shame it was never finished.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 06:14 PM

No, not quite wet enough for that. I'll give you a clue. It would really have wound Gluon up.......


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