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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 14 Mar 10 - 12:42 PM
Amos 14 Mar 10 - 12:04 PM
Rapparee 14 Mar 10 - 11:16 AM
Amos 14 Mar 10 - 11:04 AM
Amos 14 Mar 10 - 10:49 AM
GUEST,Eiseley 14 Mar 10 - 01:05 AM
Acme 13 Mar 10 - 11:33 PM
Rapparee 13 Mar 10 - 11:26 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 13 Mar 10 - 11:16 PM
Acme 13 Mar 10 - 11:01 PM
Amos 13 Mar 10 - 10:49 PM
Amos 13 Mar 10 - 04:34 PM
Eiseley 13 Mar 10 - 04:02 PM
Rapparee 13 Mar 10 - 02:45 PM
Little Hawk 13 Mar 10 - 02:04 PM
Amos 13 Mar 10 - 02:01 PM
Rapparee 13 Mar 10 - 10:37 AM
Little Hawk 13 Mar 10 - 01:32 AM
Amos 13 Mar 10 - 12:50 AM
Rapparee 12 Mar 10 - 11:11 PM
Eiseley 12 Mar 10 - 10:44 PM
Amos 12 Mar 10 - 07:48 PM
Rapparee 12 Mar 10 - 07:09 PM
Acme 12 Mar 10 - 06:43 PM
Rapparee 12 Mar 10 - 03:48 PM
Amos 12 Mar 10 - 01:30 PM
Acme 12 Mar 10 - 01:07 PM
Little Hawk 12 Mar 10 - 12:57 PM
Amos 12 Mar 10 - 11:19 AM
Amos 12 Mar 10 - 10:57 AM
Amos 11 Mar 10 - 09:53 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 11 Mar 10 - 07:55 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 11 Mar 10 - 07:24 PM
Little Hawk 11 Mar 10 - 03:51 PM
Acme 11 Mar 10 - 01:01 PM
Acme 11 Mar 10 - 11:26 AM
Acme 11 Mar 10 - 11:25 AM
Amos 11 Mar 10 - 09:48 AM
Eiseley 11 Mar 10 - 12:21 AM
Janie 11 Mar 10 - 12:07 AM
Amos 11 Mar 10 - 12:03 AM
Eiseley 10 Mar 10 - 11:42 PM
Acme 10 Mar 10 - 11:16 PM
Acme 10 Mar 10 - 10:51 PM
Eiseley 10 Mar 10 - 10:48 PM
Janie 10 Mar 10 - 10:34 PM
Janie 10 Mar 10 - 10:32 PM
Amos 10 Mar 10 - 08:39 PM
Amos 10 Mar 10 - 08:18 PM
Acme 10 Mar 10 - 05:20 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 14 Mar 10 - 12:42 PM

"it is good to notice that we are proving our mastery of time itself"


Ah-ha! ha! ha! ha!

My good man, it's the other way around. Time is the master of us. Just look in the mirror for proof of that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Mar 10 - 12:04 PM

Moose-turd Pi for you, you meandering miscreant!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Mar 10 - 11:16 AM

Blackberry, please.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Mar 10 - 11:04 AM

HAPPY PI DAY MOM!!! 3.14








"In honor of Pi Day, March 14 (or 3.14 for those who may need a hint), readers may be interested in reading an interview with Professor Daisuke Takahashi, the Japanese researcher who found 2.5 trillion digits of Pi back in August, before being apparently being edged out in December by a French computer programmer looking to prove his efficient coding abilities. Professor Takahashi's interview gives some unique insight into one man who truly marvels at the number that has driven people to ever greater lengths to find more digits for centuries."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Mar 10 - 10:49 AM

Two of our clocks and all our computers and iPhones are self-setting thanks to the miracle of a radio-soaked civilization. The rest are all put right now. One only had to have the clock hands turned by tweaking a wheel with the finger--the old kitchen clock with the Gothic hands. It is almost hard to remember when every clock in my home had to be set by twisting a shaft.

In this rare day when we are resetting the counters of our lives, it is good to notice that we are proving our mastery of time itself, even though it is easy to fall into an automated slumber of blind compliance with the seconds and minutes we borrowed from our silly Moon and our spinning mudball of a planet. It is ours to say how it shall be counted and where it shall start.

Mom, I did the birdcage all clean. The birds appreciate it.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 14 Mar 10 - 01:05 AM

As one black bug bled blue-black blood

the other black bug bled blue.



Goodnight, folks,
Remember to set your clocks ahead.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 11:33 PM

We are a bad influence, aren't we?

There are quite a few practice html threads here at Mudcat. You can learn quite a lot from some of these folks who took the time to code in the instructions so you can see what it is supposed to look like (when of course you normally don't see the code unless you look at the source.)

Rap, are you okay? The road trip got you feeling a little loopy?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 11:26 PM

Spaciously spread spooky Spanish spinach spans species.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 11:16 PM

Important Information



This is my first attempt at these tricks!



The vessel with the pestle
has the pellet with the poison.



The flagon with the dragon
has the brew that is true!



I'm trying to figure out the invisible writing, now!"



Eiseley



Thank you for the encouragement, dear Stilly.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 11:01 PM

I used to enjoy the postings of our Teresa, and you can PM her and sometimes get a response. I don't think she has been by for a long time now, tho. I'm in a new iteration of my email so have probably lost her address.

I hate to think of what JAWS made of some of our postings for her listening pleasure. :-/


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 10:49 PM

I am listening to My Clinch Mountain Home, by the Carter Family. We just watched "Saving Grace" but I don't recommend it.

I have a new office at work with a big window. I spent three hours there this morning trying to figure out where all my junk should go. It's impossible.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 04:34 PM

She dropped into the slipstream, alas. I miss her.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 04:02 PM

I was wondering, what ever happened to Teresa?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 02:45 PM

I used to date her. How could I ever forget Pearl Pureheart? Ah, youth!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 02:04 PM

Thy visage is sicklied o'er with a foul humour. So too thy vainglorious protestations.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 02:01 PM

Nay, I shall not be moved by your fiery noises and your vituperous incantations; I have the strength of an hundred, yea, for mine Harte is Pure.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 10:37 AM

Then, villein, by bell, book and candle I must cast thee out in the Darkness, where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth, yea, even the gnashing of dentures, and where the worm of everlasting fire (much like the chile sauce I had last night) shall eat at thy guts forever or until you make a suitable donation of your worldly goods, whichever comes first.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 01:32 AM

Forfend, wretch! You begin to vex me. Get thee thither, like an ill wind, and trouble us no longer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 10 - 12:50 AM

Neither belief nor geld shall be rendered unto Mammon, no matter what he claims.

Go to, rapscallion. Your obsequy shall avail thee NAUGHT!!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 11:11 PM

Believe, Amos! Your warped soul can still be made straight by the super-steam of True Belief and Generous Donations*.






















*Non-deductible for taxation purposes, so that you suffer more.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 10:44 PM

There's nothing quite as satisfying as going on a trip
Unless it be coming home from one.

Good ol' Henry David


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 07:48 PM

All warping is in the soul of the beholder, Goode Mye Manne of Booques.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 07:09 PM

I am in Santa Fe and will be here tomorrow night as well. Then, on Sunday, we drive back to Albuquerque to fly home on Monday. Amos' soul is warped, for Amos does not Believe.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 06:43 PM

Are you still on the road, Rapaire? Perhaps what you're detecting is that your rotor is warped? How are your brakes working?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 03:48 PM

Amos' soul is warped! Amos soul is warped!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 01:30 PM

I will be here but Mom doesn't need any help.   She is wired, as you know, into a complex network of servomechanisms, routers, relays, oscillators, capacitative devices and Schottke schlockers that enable her to read real time every one-millionth of a second anywhere in the world by observing the rate of decay in ultraviolet radiation from a first-magnitude bluish-white giant of spectral class B2 III somewhere out in the region of Orion. Everybody knows that!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 01:07 PM

It's Friday! Who is going to be around on Sunday to change all of MOM's clocks?

The rest of you, watch out for folks who want to clean your clocks.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 12:57 PM

To the contrary! It becomes more and more intoxicating the deeper you go into it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 11:19 AM

That is something only you can do, for you must make amends for the errors you create in the Universe I have created. If you do not, your soul will become warped...

Isn't that just like a control freak religionist? "If the Universe is good, it is because I created it and everything in it. If something in it is bad, you need to take responsibility for that. It's probably your fault. Mine the blessings, yours the sin, suck it up..."

Mwahahahaha!! Talk about a double standard. I guess solipsism loses its charm when you look too closely...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Mar 10 - 10:57 AM

Rise again,
RIse Again,
Let the Mother of all BS rise again.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 09:53 PM

Many miles separate.
Ether's ev'rywhere zero.
At once, home with Mom.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 07:55 PM

In other words:

Far from home tonight
The new adopted daughter
Says hello to Mom.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 07:24 PM

Far from home tonight but at least this trusty notebook can still access this thread!

Oh no! All day during the somewhat informative conference I'm attending I kept thinking about y'all. I'm afraid I'm hooked, lined, sinkered.

Eiseley with three e's.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 03:51 PM

Aha! Another meaningless milestone! Let's all get out our kazoos and play the MOABS national anthem. ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 01:01 PM

There's a little round number here. 34600.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 11:26 AM

But spelled correctly, of course. Eisely.


(I had pegged that connection the first time you used it, but thought it might be rushing things a little to out you so soon!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 11:25 AM

Loren Eisley's.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 09:48 AM

That is beautiful. Yours?


Poignant.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 12:21 AM

The Strawberry Boxes

In the summers the girl workers in the far towns where they packed strawberries
would occasionally
write their names on a box
my name
is Mary
my name is
my name is
write to me . . .
they were lonely
in that place.

I knew from the boxes in our little corner grocery that the girls lived mostly in Arkansas.
When I worked in the hatchery the eggs came in from all over
Sometimes
an egg
would be penciled
write
please write
my name is Helen
my name
my name is
write
I am young.

Working girls from all over America were scribbling names
secretively on boxes
and hoping
somewhere
there was
the right boy
who would
answer.

I never wrote because I, too, was a worker, there wasn't time
where we turned the eggs
in the hundred-degree
temperatures
in incubators
the size of rooms,
even then mechanized.

Now, in age, I hope they made out somehow
with the local product
but I know
better.

No man is a hero in his home town. The girls always want someone
someone
who lives
over the
next hill
or in the far
city
one never sees.

Boys and girls I guess we were all lonely and didn't know
what to do,
so the girls
wrote it on eggs
or strawberry boxes:
you there
over the horizon
love me
I am lonely
write.

But then they married and kept on thinking of the strawberry boxes
and the letters
that
never came
and would never
and maybe
the man
left them?
or they
never found one?
luckless.

Maybe it is all solved now in the big cities where everyone
goes,
where no one says
lonely,
no one says
write me.

I think about it sometimes and wonder whether Mary made out
or was it Helen?
they would be
grey now,
their kids
would be
grown up,
but do the girls,
I want to know,
do the children
still write
on the boxes
in the factories:
I am lonely
my name is
my name is.
Live being
as life is
maybe they do.
If I had
strawberry boxes
to pack
I would write
remember me
my name is
a thousand times,
and watch
the trains
haul them away
over the horizon,
but the boxes
are now
green plastic;
I must find
some other way.


       G'night!
       Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 12:07 AM

"nite MOM.

Wash behind yer ears, Stilly and Eiseley, before you go to bed.

As fer the rest of youse - don't let the bedbugs bite!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Mar 10 - 12:03 AM

So if I get dis Latin stuff Janie is throwin around right, she wants us to understan' as how she is portrayin an old Roman guy named Cicero, who sounds to me like he was gay, and as him she is saying in turn , empty a full understanding of the world of force this is impossible to maintain truth our wish perceptions. Forward , each mind presentation these his origin upon sensation : when no contest knowledge will be hold , if not whole sensations are true , when system of Epicurus instructor when they are. Quae to refuse mighty of sensation and to make known when nowhere can to emerge feel having to shut out proof of wish , are unable or to set forth his argumentation. Over, upon , very to destroy knowledge and knowledge they to destroy whole possibility of rationally life and deed. So Straight Philosophy supplies valor when likeness to respect of violent death ; deliberation when to struggle against dread of religious ; peace of mind , for this to take away by force whole unacquainted with of mysteries of force ; I sovereignty , for this to unloose force of prayer and excellent its different dutiful ; and , when I to rain now , Canon or Criterion of Knowledge , and Epicurus also appointed , gives a system of discerning truth out of forgery.


Or sompn. Its gobbly geek tah me, but wot the hell do I know?

Reilly


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 11:42 PM

Yes! Good on you for figuring that out. I have enjoyed and been inspired by everything Loren Eiseley wrote, but my favorite is probably All the Strange Hours. I have to be careful when I read some books, though, because he can tend toward the melancholy and take me there as well. But the eloquence makes up for a bit of dreariness.

He has a poem about dairy girls writing secret messages on eggs.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 11:16 PM

We cross-posted. What a hoot about that instrument, Loren. (IS he your inspiration?) :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 10:51 PM

Hmmm.

Well, Darn. I thought
maybe
Janie figured out
Invisible Writing.



Just a thought. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 10:48 PM

About priorities:
A while ago I was driving to an appointment and passed a For Sale sign taped to the bumper of an old car. The sign was offering a musical instrument for a cheap price! I was in a hurry and couldn't stop then, but I was encouraged that it would still be there when I came back, because for one thing, they had spelled the name of the instrument incorrectly and I figured that if they didn't even know how to spell it they might part with it pretty cheaply. Unfortunately, I forgot about it when I was returning, and by the time I drove by again several days later I knew they had probably sold it. Darn! I had built up in my mind how fun it would have been to have that particular instrument. I've never played a double reed before, but I am willing to dabble, especially for a good price.

Well, then yesterday I was driving by again, so I slowed down to see if I could see the sign again. Sure enough, there it was! But this time I was driving slowly so I had time to see that the sign really said: $200.00 Obo. I thought about it some more as I was driving and then it suddenly hit me that the thing for sale was the OLD CAR, and the oboe they were talking about was really "or best offer!" How crushing! The worst part is that I was so excited about finding a used oboe that the people obviously valued so little that they would stick a misspelled sign about it to the bumper of an old beat-up car.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 10:34 PM

But I can't play three games, at least not at once. Those tutorials on making colorful, scrolling posts make my head hurt. Only worth it to tout overwhelming success of Carolina or WVU in football or basketball.











Just sos you knows I haves me priorties straight.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 10:32 PM

Humph. I can play both games. To wit:

Vicissim , vacuus a plenus intelligendo of orbis terrarum of vis is est impossible sustento verum nostri voluntas perceptions. Porro , sulum mental presentation has suus satus in sensation : ut haud certain scientia ero possible , nisi totus sensations es verus , ut ratio of Epicurus magister ut they es. Qui denego validity of sensation quod narro ut nusquam can exsisto sentio having excludo testimonium of voluntas , es unable vel expono suus argument. Super , per aboleo scientia quod scientia they aboleo totus possibility of sane vita quod factum. Sic Rectus Philosophy victualia virtus ut visio vereor of nex ; consilium ut reluctor formidonis of monastica ; pacis of mens , pro is aufero totus ignarus of mysteries of vis ; ego - imperium , pro is persolvo vis of votum quod precipuus suum diversus pius ; quod , ut EGO pluo modo , Canonus vel Criterion of Scientia , quod Epicurus quoque statutum tempus , dat a ratio of scius verum ex subjectio.

Cicero


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 08:39 PM

So I read inna paper where da science fellers are stickin' wid dat relativinissity equation and also wid dahk maddah. Hey, I gotcher dahk maddah right here, ya know woddeye mean? Haw!! But in a serious vein, how come dey are all sticking with dese old theories? Dey must be conservatives. But dey say it is on account of how dey have measured seventy t'ousand galaxies and analyzed dere velocipedes. Whaddo I know? I just tink da whole ting is suspicious, I don' even know anyboddy who even COUNTS dat high.

Reilly


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 08:18 PM

"A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything."

"Egoism is the very essence of a noble soul."

-- Friedrich Nietzsche

"Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest."

"Tis better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all
doubt."

"There are lies, damn lies, and statistics."

"It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and
not deserve them."

--Samuel Clemens

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."
--MLK


"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has."



"Control thy passions lest they take vengence on thee."


"Difficulties are things that show a person what they are."
-- Epictetus


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 10 Mar 10 - 05:20 PM

I've been answering questions over at Mahalo, and have concluded that some of those folks need a good dose of MOAB. If they're going to write BS, they might as well learn it from the masters.


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