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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 27 May 10 - 01:25 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 27 May 10 - 04:21 PM
Amos 27 May 10 - 04:22 PM
Little Hawk 27 May 10 - 04:48 PM
Janie 27 May 10 - 07:21 PM
Acme 27 May 10 - 07:58 PM
Janie 27 May 10 - 10:05 PM
Rapparee 27 May 10 - 10:26 PM
Amos 27 May 10 - 10:40 PM
Janie 27 May 10 - 10:50 PM
Acme 27 May 10 - 11:56 PM
Rapparee 28 May 10 - 11:01 AM
Amos 28 May 10 - 11:46 AM
Rapparee 28 May 10 - 12:08 PM
Acme 28 May 10 - 01:01 PM
MMario 28 May 10 - 01:11 PM
Amos 28 May 10 - 03:32 PM
Amos 28 May 10 - 04:14 PM
Rapparee 28 May 10 - 07:44 PM
Amos 29 May 10 - 01:21 AM
Little Hawk 29 May 10 - 03:26 AM
Rapparee 29 May 10 - 08:32 AM
Rapparee 29 May 10 - 08:41 AM
Amos 29 May 10 - 09:23 AM
Amos 29 May 10 - 10:08 AM
Acme 29 May 10 - 11:28 AM
Little Hawk 29 May 10 - 12:40 PM
Acme 29 May 10 - 02:03 PM
Rapparee 29 May 10 - 03:37 PM
gnu 29 May 10 - 03:46 PM
Little Hawk 29 May 10 - 05:22 PM
Amos 29 May 10 - 07:32 PM
Amos 29 May 10 - 07:41 PM
Eiseley 29 May 10 - 08:54 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 08:56 AM
Amos 30 May 10 - 09:24 AM
Acme 30 May 10 - 11:58 AM
Amos 30 May 10 - 12:35 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 01:40 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 03:02 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 05:13 PM
Eiseley 30 May 10 - 05:48 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 06:36 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 07:25 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 07:26 PM
Eiseley 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM
Eiseley 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 07:34 PM
Rapparee 30 May 10 - 08:09 PM
Amos 30 May 10 - 09:17 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 May 10 - 01:25 PM

Kenworth. Them Peterbilts couldn't run over old Aunt Minnie. Grandpa was tough. Or maybe it was the other way around.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 27 May 10 - 04:21 PM

My youngest sons and I all got new mp3 players in our Christmas stockings. They all look alike, so I wrote "Mom" in sharpie marker on the top of mine. But still, Tom and Will can't tell theirs apart. Will was looking for his yesterday and I held out one and asked if he thought it was his.

"Well, the only way you can tell for sure is if it has 'Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer' on it," he said. "That's my favorite song."

Eiseley

P.S. Not Algerian, but ribbed---to represent your talent for such.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 10 - 04:22 PM

Mebbe a Minnie Harley?   One of those HO gauge ones? Vrooom!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 May 10 - 04:48 PM

Die, Roadrunner! Die!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 27 May 10 - 07:21 PM

LOL!

(LH, I worry about you.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 May 10 - 07:58 PM

LH. Arrrgghh.

Eiseley, my son has my mp3 player. He's going to have to open it to see if he can get the dial to turn better. He was swamped in a rainstorm a couple of weeks ago and thinks just enough water got in and dried out or displaced whatever was lubricating the underside of the jog thing. His mp3 player just plain wore out (the jack wasn't working) but now if we had that, instead of the warranty replacement of the sale price ($40), we might cobble the two together. . . Oh, well. I don't think I'll get my player back again. It had recorded books on the card, and those came out, but in the player itself I'd saved some family photos, some videos (Susan Boyle, etc.) so it might be a while before he finally erases those, but once they're gone, I know he'll have claimed it completely.

I didn't use it much, mostly to listen to the radio when I enjoyed a story on NPR when I was driving and wanted to listen to the rest of it in the store, etc.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:05 PM

I never figured out how to operate the iPod nano consistently. (now I can't find it.) I used it (or tried to) for books when I was traveling.

Sum Yung Sun gifted me with an iPod shuffle for Mother's Day.

I'm afraid to take it out of the box.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:26 PM

I've got one. It has books and some music on it. I use it when I travel on airplanes. That way people don't bother me except at takeoff and landing and during the time in between.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:40 PM

Aww, Janie, g'wan. They're a piece of cake.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:50 PM

Never could eat cake without getting icing all over the place:>)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 May 10 - 11:56 PM

I loved my little Sansa Fuze, but hated earbuds. I finally got a set of earphones, small, that work. So now I've given the player to my son. I had these teeny tiny little Broadway performances, Susan Boyle, Betty Buckley, etc., that I could listen to and watch. And little bitty movies, if you want. But mostly books and radio. And Bob Dylan. I seemed to listen to the Bob Dylan songs a lot on there. Great for gardening, I guess.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 May 10 - 11:01 AM

Have you ever noticed how many folk singers have trees as their surname? There's Phil Ochs, for example.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 May 10 - 11:46 AM

And Roy Ash, and Pinetuh Pine...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 May 10 - 12:08 PM

And Tom Paxton, and Buffy St. Marie, and Ivar Hoagland, and Kendall Morse, and Gordon Lightfoot, and Judy Collins, and Peter Yarrow.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 May 10 - 01:01 PM

That's Ivar Haglund. :) Grew up eating his fish and chips and grilled salmon and all sorts of other wonderful sea food.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 28 May 10 - 01:11 PM

hmmmm - what would a tree called a "morse" look like?

I have a good idea what a yarrow-tree would look like.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 May 10 - 03:32 PM

A Paxton Tree looks like the 60's peace symbol, of course. I think a Morse is kinda scrawny and litters the ground with dots and dashes...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 May 10 - 04:14 PM

By the way--is that the 36 of Kay I see looming on the horizon?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 May 10 - 07:44 PM

Yes, Amos, it is. Very good! You're getting to recognize numbers pretty well now and WITHOUT using your fingers! Mom is very proud of you, as are we all. We'd like you to start working on chewing tobacco with your mouth closed now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 10 - 01:21 AM

I'll do better. But first I want to see you chew gum and walk at the same time.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 May 10 - 03:26 AM

And before that I want to see you pontificate and postulate at the same time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 May 10 - 08:32 AM

I don't chew gum. But I have recently learned to breathe and walk at the same time. Will that do?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 May 10 - 08:41 AM

LH, please don't encourage public postulazation. In some parts of the US it's a felony except when performed by politicians.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 10 - 09:23 AM

That's how the really first-class pontificators operate--on-the-fly postulation, real-time redundancy and dual-layer hypersignification carefully trained to function together in a seamless application.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 10 - 10:08 AM

Nothing, thou elder brother ev'n to Shade
Thou hadst a being ere the world was made,
And, well fixed, art alone of ending not afraid.
...........................2
Ere Time and Place were, Time and Place were not,
When primitive Nothing Something straight begot,
Then all proceeded from the great united What.
...........................3
Something, the general attribute of all,
Severed from thee, its sole original,
Into thy boundless self must undistinguished fall.
...........................4
Yet Something did thy mighty power command,
And from thy fruitful emptiness's hand
Snatched men, beasts, birds, fire, water, air, and land.
...........................5
Matter, the wicked'st offspring of thy race,
By Form assisted, flew from thy embrace
And rebel Light obscured thy reverend dusky face.
...........................6
With Form and Matter, Time and Place did join,
Body, thy foe, with these did leagues combine
To spoil thy peaceful realm and ruin all thy line.
...........................7
But turncoat Time assists the foe in vain,
And bribed by thee destroys their short-lived reign,
And to thy hungry womb drives back thy slaves again.
...........................8
Though mysteries are barred from laic eyes,
And the divine alone with warrant pries
Into thy bosom, where thy truth in private lies;
...........................9
Yet this of thee the wise may truly say:
Thou from the virtuous nothing doest delay,
And to be part of thee the wicked wisely pray.
...........................10
Great Negative, how vainly would the wise
Enquire, define, distinguish, teach, devise,
Didst thou not stand to point their blind philosophies.
...........................11
Is or Is Not, the two great ends of Fate,
And true or false, the subject of debate,
That perfect or destroy the vast designs of state;
...........................12
When they have racked the politician's breast,
Within thy bosom most securely rest,
And when reduced to thee are least unsafe, and best.
...........................13
But, Nothing, why does Something still permit
That sacred monarchs should at council sit
With persons highly thought, at best, for nothing fit;
...........................14
Whilst weighty something modestly abstains
From princes' coffers, and from Statesmen's brains,
And nothing there, like stately Nothing reigns?
...........................15
Nothing, who dwell'st with fools in grave disguise,
For whom they reverend shapes and forms devise,
Lawn-sleeves, and furs, and gowns, when they like thee look wise.
...........................16
French truth, Dutch prowess, British policy,
Hibernian learning, Scotch civility,
Spaniards' dispatch, Danes' wit, are mainly seen in thee.
...........................17
The great man's gratitude to his best friend,
Kings' promises, whores' vows, towards thee they bend,
Flow swiftly into thee, and in thee ever end.

John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester
(1647-80)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 May 10 - 11:28 AM

That's how the really first-class pontificators operate--on-the-fly postulation, real-time redundancy and dual-layer hypersignification carefully trained to function together in a seamless application.

I think there's space in that definition to shoe-horn in the words Obtuse and Obfuscation.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 May 10 - 12:40 PM

That was a spectacular example of Amos's best bafflegab....or what might also be termed his "premium bilgeroar". Very impressive indeed. It reduces the listener to stupefaction and congeals the fluids in the brain, causing a brief period of insentience followed by an acute need to empty the bladder.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 May 10 - 02:03 PM

Or bowels.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 May 10 - 03:37 PM

Or both.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 29 May 10 - 03:46 PM

Amos... "That's how the really first-class pontificators operate--on-the-fly postulation, real-time redundancy and dual-layer hypersignification carefully trained to function together in a seamless application."

Round here that's a "slick talker". Ye fellers out there in Calleeforneeahh sure do talk large and slow.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 May 10 - 05:22 PM

I don't think I've heard anything else that can match "dual-layer hypersignification". ;-) Amos should get a job writing top level corporate memos with that sort of talent.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 10 - 07:32 PM

Well, it's just there's not much I don't know about pontification, ya see. Simple, after all...not me, the question.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 29 May 10 - 07:41 PM

It's been a long a tiring day, Momn, but productive. My neighbor came over and between us we managed to cut three holes in the living room ceiling, fish a 14-gauge switch strand down through several layers of structural blocks to a switch box, expand the box cutout and replace yhe box with a two-gang, run fifty feet of fourteen-gauge through the crawlspace, make a new junctionbox half-way down the crawlspace over head, mount three ceiling lights in the three holes and wire them up. The job included cutting an access panel in the roof of one closet, and then replacing the removed drywall and mudding same. An exhausting piece of work. But we now have three cieling lights on a dimmer switch which add a very noice light over the fireplace, yayyyy us!

Tomorrow I shall hie me to yon Balboa of Parkes to play music on the greensward.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 29 May 10 - 08:54 PM

Light is good. Way to go, Amos!

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 08:56 AM

"Light is good."

If light is good, what about "light headed" and "light fingered"? If light is good, why do parents yell, "Turn off the light and go to sleep!"?

DARK is good. It's the absence of light. Light sucks up dark, showing conclusively that light is for suckers.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 09:24 AM

I see Raspaire has gone over to the dark side. No surprises there, he;s secretly been a Republican for several years.

If light gets sucked up by dark why does it run away when the light turns on?   Shadows vanish before Apollo, the Sun. Explain it, oh Manne of Darqunesse,

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 May 10 - 11:58 AM

Note to Amos: lamps are easier. You can get the cutest little uplights that only require proper placement and then plugging them in. Maybe in your next house. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 12:35 PM

YEah, but lamps are lumpy. These ceiling lights look cools nestled into the overhead and shine softly down on same really lovely ancient mineral samples we have on the mantle piece. Which in turn is a lovely piece of oiled jojoba wood, tight grained and sweet.

Besides, the extensions cords for those lamps would look silly.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 01:40 PM

Mom, I finished a Chapter!! And then I cleaned my keyboard with Qtips and alcohol and a vacuum.

Life is goot, ya?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 03:02 PM

Amos, I will not speculate what you mean by "finished a Chapter", which required you to disinfect your keyboard. It does, however, sound disgusting and quite improper. If you must engage in such behavior please keep it to yourself and be sure to wash you hands as well as your keyboard afterwards!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 05:13 PM

Dear Rapaire:

You sound more and more like a Republican every day! Such lurid, uninvited imaginings on your part do not speak well of the chronic bent of your mental landscape, so to speak. I cleaned the keyboard because th emany months of clicking, writing and other kinds of keyboard stuff have rendered it all grimy with fingerprints. By "finished a Chapter" I simply meant I had completed adding a new chapter to my endless novel. See? Life is a lot less dirty than you seem to see it. La vie en sperme leaves much to be desired...

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 30 May 10 - 05:48 PM

This is what George MacDonald had to say on the subject of light (from The Light Princess)

"It is a good thing to be light-hearted, I am sure, . . . ."

"It is a bad thing to be light-headed," answered the queen, looking
with prophetic soul far into the future.

"'Tis a good thing to be light-handed," said the king.

"'Tis a bad thing to be light-fingered," answered the queen.

"'Tis a good thing to be light-footed," said the
king.

"'Tis a bad thing--" began the queen; but the king interrupted her.

"In fact," said he, with the tone of one who concludes an argument
in which he has had only imaginary opponents, and in which,
therefore, he has come off triumphant--"in fact, it is a good thing
altogether to be light-bodied."

"But it is a bad thing altogether to be light- minded," retorted
the queen, who was beginning to lose her temper.

This last answer quite discomfited his Majesty, who turned on his
heel, and betook himself to his counting-house again. But he was
not half-way towards it, when the voice of his queen overtook him.

"And it's a bad thing to be light-haired," screamed she, determined
to have more last words, now that her spirit was roused.

The queen's hair was black as night; and the king's had been, and
his daughter's was, golden as morning. But it was not this
reflection on his hair that arrested him; it was the double use of
the word light. For the king hated all witticisms, and punning
especially. And besides, he could not tell whether the queen meant
light-haired or light-heired; for why might she not aspirate her
vowels when she was exasperated herself?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 06:36 PM

Amos, I said that I wasn't going to speculate upon what you meant by "finished a Chapter." Perhaps you meant that you sneezed on your keyboard because of Spring pollen, the last sneeze before you new allergy medicine takes effect. Perhaps you meant that you have entered menopause and are starting a "new Chapter" of your life. Perhaps you have ceased your flirtation with Apple and are ready to move to some flavor of Linux, a real operating system. It would be foolish for me to theorize without sufficient data, as my old teacher Sherringford "Sherlock" Holmes taught me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:25 PM

If I don't take it Amos will.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:26 PM

But no, not even he would stoop so low...and I certainly wouldn't. Let someone like Eiseley have it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM

Please?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:29 PM

snicker


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 07:34 PM

Eiseley has now done something fine,
Has seized the thirty-five and nine!
God bless her! then, we all do say
For moving Mom toward the next of Kay.


Rapaire:

You didn't have to speculate, because I told you. But when you DID speculate you speculated below the salt.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 May 10 - 08:09 PM

Of course I did. I have been "below the salt" all of my life. I was raised below the salt, I grew up there, I have no doubt that I will be buried there (hopefully I will be dead if that happens). I am a life-long subsaltine. In fact, I think I'll change my MC name to "Subsaltine" and see if anyone notices.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 May 10 - 09:17 PM

A subsaltine???? What, you couldn't pass the exam to be a cracker?



A


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