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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 12 Feb 07 - 10:28 AM
Amos 12 Feb 07 - 10:17 AM
Bunnahabhain 12 Feb 07 - 10:05 AM
Amos 12 Feb 07 - 09:54 AM
JennyO 12 Feb 07 - 06:24 AM
Acme 12 Feb 07 - 01:53 AM
Little Hawk 12 Feb 07 - 12:49 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Feb 07 - 11:44 PM
Rapparee 11 Feb 07 - 10:28 PM
Little Hawk 11 Feb 07 - 09:47 PM
Acme 11 Feb 07 - 08:54 PM
Amos 11 Feb 07 - 05:15 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Feb 07 - 04:56 PM
Rapparee 11 Feb 07 - 03:34 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Feb 07 - 02:34 PM
Rapparee 11 Feb 07 - 02:10 PM
Amos 11 Feb 07 - 01:47 PM
Little Hawk 11 Feb 07 - 01:38 PM
Rapparee 11 Feb 07 - 01:34 PM
Acme 11 Feb 07 - 12:12 PM
JennyO 11 Feb 07 - 12:05 PM
MMario 11 Feb 07 - 11:57 AM
Amos 11 Feb 07 - 11:48 AM
Rapparee 11 Feb 07 - 11:34 AM
Rapparee 11 Feb 07 - 11:32 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Feb 07 - 11:29 AM
Amos 11 Feb 07 - 11:08 AM
Rapparee 11 Feb 07 - 10:58 AM
Amos 11 Feb 07 - 10:37 AM
Acme 11 Feb 07 - 01:18 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 10 Feb 07 - 10:18 PM
Amos 10 Feb 07 - 09:34 PM
Rapparee 10 Feb 07 - 03:40 PM
Peace 10 Feb 07 - 03:39 PM
JennyO 10 Feb 07 - 12:00 PM
Rapparee 10 Feb 07 - 11:53 AM
JennyO 10 Feb 07 - 11:40 AM
Rapparee 10 Feb 07 - 11:09 AM
JennyO 10 Feb 07 - 10:59 AM
Rapparee 09 Feb 07 - 11:25 PM
Acme 09 Feb 07 - 11:05 PM
Peace 09 Feb 07 - 11:02 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 09 Feb 07 - 11:00 PM
Acme 09 Feb 07 - 10:52 PM
Rapparee 09 Feb 07 - 08:56 PM
Acme 09 Feb 07 - 03:42 PM
Rapparee 09 Feb 07 - 02:59 PM
Rapparee 09 Feb 07 - 01:08 PM
Amos 09 Feb 07 - 11:57 AM
Rapparee 09 Feb 07 - 11:09 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 10:28 AM

Finally! A perfectly ripened papaya. Ahh...what bliss!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 10:17 AM

Well, Bunn, talk to Jenny about word pictures....


;>)


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 10:05 AM

Please, not now, I was trying to eat.

In fact, just no generally.....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 09:54 AM

Sweaty rolls of flab over a dessicate bun, with watery sauce. Just the thing.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 06:24 AM

Somehow the word pictures I am getting don't seem all that appealing...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 01:53 AM

Be sure to bare your perspiring chest while you're at it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Feb 07 - 12:49 AM

No.....but I can...just....give me a moment...to get in character. (spoken with a knowing smirk)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 11:44 PM

Well, Little, Hawk, you, may, have, spent, years, studying, the, Shatman, but, you, certainly, don't, talk, like, him.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 10:28 PM

MOM! Little Hawk said That Name again!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 09:47 PM

Har! Har! I love your sense of humor, Amos. I knew you'd pick up on that angle.

My absence, Rapaire, was an attempt at emotional blackmail. I wanted to see how long it would take for the PMs to start rolling in, begging me to return.

In the end I took pity on you guys and decided to come back early and surprise you. This way you get to avoid the humiliation that begging me to return would have entailed. I've learned compassion from my years of studying William Shatner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 08:54 PM

Well, MOM, Moonglow is feeling a little better now. She came home on Friday with bronchitis or the flu, we'll see how it drags out next week to see which it was (she has antibiotics for the bronchitis, but that won't touch the flu part if she has it). She wants to go back up to school this evening, so I'm headed out to take her. There went my weekend of gardening and cleaning house. Waited hand and foot on a sick kid instead. I did finish my income tax so she can apply for scholarships, and we got her FAFSA application completed tonight. So it didn't all get wasted.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 05:15 PM

I would not noise that little tactic around, BWL -- you never know who might think it should be resurrected to add to their glittering armory of techniques of date-persuasion...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 04:56 PM

Yeah, ol' Freddie probably got all he could handle. That's the kind of power guys with red beards have over women. Of course, being able to say "Do as I say or I'll have your nose chopped off!" probably expedited things a bit.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 03:34 PM

Two important dates were Adela of Vohburg and Beatrice of Burgundy (by whom he had a bunch of kids). There were also some groupies in Milan, Adrianople, Aachen, Rome and other places, but they weren't really date -- just some one-night-or-faster stands.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 02:34 PM

While your at it, define "disambiguation", "obstreperous" and "pachysandra". Then write a five-page essay on the reign of Frederick Barbarossa, being sure to include important dates.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 02:10 PM

Please also define "Has" "happened" "while" "I" "was."

Also, please discuss your absence, which wasn't noted.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 01:47 PM

Define "worth" and "anything" and "gone", LH. Given your solipsistic character, it strikes me that the question is self-contradictory.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 01:38 PM

Has anything worthwhile happened while I was gone? ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 01:34 PM

I claim 16661.

No, I was never Chief Altar Boy. I am too humble to attain to such a glorious rank.

As for stamping things on atoms, wouldn't that just cause more bickering? "That's MY atom! See, it's got my name on it!" Of course, it would make it easier to have a "Return to Sender" tag for Gluon....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 12:12 PM

I think you should have that one bronzed and put it next to the street in front of your house. Thank of how many people would enjoy seeing that number as they traverse your neighborhood, lost. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 12:05 PM

Wasn't me. I'm waiting for 16091, as long as I can keep those pesky 6's and 9's from misbehaving.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 11:57 AM

didn't someone reserve this slot?

16061?

Your number's up!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 11:48 AM

The quivering sanctimony ! The smug superiority!! The mind-boggling mythological pretensions!! The mind quivers with incipient nausea at the very thought!!

Think I don't know what I'm talking about? Chief Altar Boy, Saint Matthew's Episcopal Choice, right up to the time I realized...well, never mind what I realized. But it was pre-budding-bosom time, if ya take my meaning.

In other, much more important news, light is become muych more cooperative thanks to the lion-tamers over at Hahvahd Physics:

In 1999, Hau headed a team of scientists that slowed light, which
travels
a brisk 186,282 miles a second when unimpeded, to a leisurely 38
miles an
hour by shining it into an exotic, ultracooled cloud of sodium atoms. At
temperatures a fraction of a degree above absolute zero, the atoms
coalesce into a single quantum mechanical entity known as a Bose-
Einstein
condensate. Shining a laser on the cloud tunes its optical properties so
that it becomes molasses when a second light pulse enters it.

Then, in 2001, Hau and a second team of physicists, this one from the
Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics, brought light to a complete
halt by slowly turning off the laser. The Bose-Einstein cloud turned
opaque, trapping the light pulse inside. When the laser was turned back
on, the trapped light pulse flew out.

The latest results add an additional twist: transporting the pulse to a
second Bose-Einstein cloud and regenerating the light there.

"That's the sort of stuff we find really sexy in this business," said
Eric
A. Cornell, a senior scientist at the National Institute of Standards
and
Technology.

In the new Harvard experiment, when the initial pulse slammed into the
first Bose-Einstein cloud, the collision caused 50,000 to 100,000 of the
sodium atoms to start spinning, almost like small tops, and pushed this
small clump forward at less than a mile an hour.

Hau described the clump of atoms as a "metacopy" of the light pulse.
Although it consisted of sodium atoms instead of particles of light, it
exactly captured the characteristics of the light pulse.

The clump floated out from the rest of the cloud, traveled about
two-tenths of a millimeter and burrowed into a second Bose-Einstein
cloud.
When a laser was shined on the second cloud, the atom clump transformed
into a new pulse of light identical to the original pulse.

It was refinements to the 2001 experimental technique that extended the
time the particles maintain quantum collective behavior. This allowed
the
clump to reach the second cloud.

Pondering the applications
Transforming a light signal into a clump of atoms could be a way of
storing information. ("You could put it on the shelf for a while," Hau
said.) It could also enable a way of performing calculations in future
optical computers that employ quantum algorithms to speed through
certain
types of calculations.

But one hurdle to building a computer that calculates with light is that
it is difficult to grab onto and manipulate a quick-moving light pulse.
Performing calculations with atomic clumps would be much easier with the
result changed back into light and then sped to the next step.

"That has been a missing link," Hau said.

The advance could also find applications in quantum cryptography, which
can hide messages in codes that cannot be broken.




This idea of stamping atoms with the pattern of light, transporting them elsewhere and having the light pop out again is an interesting one. It could lead, sooner or later, to a genuine Cloak of Invisibility!! Wahey!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 11:34 AM

Yes, we'd all be porar for their loss.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 11:32 AM

I, of course, was not among those who might gladly sin, even just a little. My time in school, from elementary through graduate, was spent on my knees, praying. I reveled in being an altar boy and thought the song "Little Altar Boy" was about me (which in fact it was). I include it here as I am sure that it will bring Amos and some other sinners to repentance, perhaps even force them into a monastery or convent (monastery for the males, convent for the females):

        
Little Altar Boy

Little altar boy, I wonder could you pray for me?
Little altar boy, for I have gone astray
What must I do to be holy like you?
Little altar boy, oh, let me hear you pray

Little altar boy, I wonder could you ask our Lord
Ask him, altar boy, to take my sins away
What must I do to be holy like you?
Little altar boy, please, let me hear you pray

Lift up your voice and say a prayer above
Help me rejoice and fill that prayer with love
Now I know my life has been all wrong
Lift up your voice and help a sinner be strong

Little altar boy, I wonder could you pray for me?
Could you tell our Lord I'm gonna change my way today?
What must I do to be holy like you?
Little altar boy, oh, let me hear you pray
Little altar boy please let me hear you pray!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 11:29 AM

Scientists are extremely concerned about the effects global warming will have upon polar snakes.

Polar snakes are an extremely important species because in following their annual migratory paths from the North Pole to the South Pole and back again, polar snakes leave subtle yet distinct trails which define the earth's longitudinal lines. If the polar snake were to become extinct, the logitudinal lines would dissapear. And since the force exerted by longitudinal lines is what holds the earth in its current spherical shape, their loss would result in the earth instantaneously springing into the shape of a cylinder instead of a sphere. Imagine a globe suddenly transformed into a Mercator projection. Greenland would suddenly swell to a size roughly equal to Africa. Greenlanders who live next-door to one another would awaken to find their houses separated by hundreds of meters. Antarctica would become a giant atoll surrounding a lagoon of empty space where the South Pole used to be.

Noted Japanese researcher Fitsuko Mibuyashi summed up the importance of preserving the polar snake population very succinctly:

"No porar snake, no rines of rongitude. No rines of rongitude, sairors get rost and not get to port. No sairors in port, bimbos and froozies not make money and overroad werfare system. Keep froozies emproyed, save porar snake."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 11:08 AM

I just love True Confessions Hour at Mom's place. It's so....real, if ya know what I mean.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 10:58 AM

When I was just a tad of a lad, many years ago, I would daily skip light-heartedly to a Catholic elementary school. There the good nuns would guide us, educate us, and gently admonish us when we would stray, child-like, from the straight and narrow path.

After eight years I graduated and went on to learn at a high school taught by the Fratres Scholarum Christianiorum -- the Christian Brothers. By then many of us had noticed Certain Bodily Changes and that the young ladies of our sister institution were also experiencing Certain Bodily Changes. These Changes made them objects of greater interest than people whose pigtails we might dip in the inkwell on our desk and indeed many of us would have willingly done more than chastely carry their books home from school while discussing the upcoming sock hop or.

The good Brothers, in their wisdom, brought to our attention a Church-founded, Church-sponsored, and Church-approved organization called "Club 69." The members of this organization made a vow to never, ever, violate the Sixth and Ninth Commandments: the injunctions against adultery and coveting your neighbor's wife. Needless to say, "Club 69" membership cards, tee shirts, and other things became very popular among my classmates until, for some unexplained reason, the Brothers closed down the club.

We were not, I must admit, interested in adultery and coveting another's wife. We were much more interested in some friendly fornication and avoiding wives, especially one of our own.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 10:37 AM

The question is, WHAT gets into the eye of the beholder.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Feb 07 - 01:18 AM

Don't pick on the 6 and 9, Rapaire! They're just fine together. It's all in the eye of the beholder.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 10:18 PM

Aren't polar cows where ice cream comes from?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 09:34 PM

I never saw a polar cow.
I never hope to see one.
But I am sure, at least for now,
It would be cold to be one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 03:40 PM

Well, you're in Australia. So you have to sleep face into the mattress, standing on your head. I'd find it uncomfortable, but I guess you get used to it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Peace
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 03:39 PM

I have to agree.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 12:00 PM

Well mine are okay, because there's an 0 between them. Come to think of it, maybe that's not enough. I should probably watch them more closely.

Now you've got me worried. How can I sleep at night?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 11:53 AM

6 and 9 are dirty little numbers. No decent winner of the Nobel Prize For Counting Things ever puts them together, because they do nasty things when you do.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 11:40 AM

Nice handy little hooks on the 6 and the 9 too. I can hang my keys on the 9.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 11:09 AM

Just reinforces my mathematical point. Some numbers don't change. They aren't swayed by the fickle winds of fashion, but remain rocks which we can tie our anchors to, metaphorically speaking.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 10 Feb 07 - 10:59 AM

I like the idea of 16091 actually - if you turn it upside down it's the same - except that the 1 isn't just a line, so it's a bit different upside down. So it's the same only different.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 11:25 PM

And contrary to what I said earlier, upside down it's 19091. That just proves what I said about upside down numbers.

I intend to use these findings as the study that gets me the Nobel Prize In Counting Things. You should know that if you steal my idea and get the Nobel Prize In Counting Things before I do I will be most displeased and unhappy, mostly because of the money.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 11:05 PM

Snort!

Everyone KNOWS that polar bears aren't at the south pole! The penguins would kick their asses out.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Peace
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 11:02 PM

Post 16061 will be palindromic. Who'd a thunk it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 11:00 PM

If they were bi-polar they'd be bears, not cows, but I don't see how their sexual orientation is of any relevance.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 10:52 PM

Around here they're from the third coast. Tri-polar. (Pardon me while I mix a few metaphors. . .)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 08:56 PM

I don't the cows had been to either the North or South Pole. Maybe they were bi-coastal, but not bi-polar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 03:42 PM

Maybe it was misdiagnosed and is actually bi-polar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 02:59 PM

The Associated Press is reported another case of Mad Cow in Canada -- the ninth.

Why are Canadian cows angry? Can't the US send bovine anger management specialists up there to help? We can help all those other countries, so why can't we help our good neighbors to the North?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 01:08 PM

Well, it wouldn't work with me! MY medial frontal lobes, along with the rest of my frontal lobes, were removed back in 1965 by an irate young woman I was dating at the time. Something about me only thinking about one thing all the time or something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 11:57 AM

Brain scans reveal intentions of calculating minds
12:43 09 February 2007
NewScientist.com news service
Roxanne Khamsi

Can a brain scan prove you're telling the truth?
06 February 2007

Brain scans that can read a person's secret intentions even before they act have been demonstrated by researchers.

In a recent study, the technology was 70% accurate at predicting whether participants planned to add or subtract a pair of numbers. Paralysed people may one day be able to use devices based on the technique to carry out complex actions, the researchers say. However, ethical concerns have been raised about its possible use in interrogation.

John-Dylan Haynes at the Max Planck Institute for Human Cognitive and Brain Sciences in Leipzig, Germany, and colleagues recruited eight people for their trial and placed each of them in a brain scanning machine that produced computed tomography (CT) images.

While participants had their brains scanned, they were asked to secretly decide whether they would add or subtract two numbers due to appear on a screen in front of them. After a pause of a few seconds, they then viewed the two numbers and gave their answer.

Train times
Once the computer program designed to interpret the brain scans had been "trained" on 40-minutes-worth of calculations by a participant, it could predict their calculating intention with 70% accuracy. Haynes explains that the computer program could do this by focusing on the pattern of activity in a brain region known as the medial prefrontal cortex.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Feb 07 - 11:09 AM

Yup, we need fresh beginnings.


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