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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 07 Nov 04 - 07:58 PM
GUEST,Patrick Henry 07 Nov 04 - 01:37 PM
Rapparee 07 Nov 04 - 12:14 AM
Acme 06 Nov 04 - 11:37 PM
Rapparee 06 Nov 04 - 07:21 PM
JennyO 06 Nov 04 - 11:03 AM
Rapparee 06 Nov 04 - 10:00 AM
Rapparee 05 Nov 04 - 06:42 PM
Rustic Rebel 05 Nov 04 - 04:55 PM
Rustic Rebel 05 Nov 04 - 04:49 PM
Rapparee 05 Nov 04 - 01:43 PM
Rapparee 05 Nov 04 - 10:52 AM
Acme 05 Nov 04 - 10:40 AM
Rustic Rebel 05 Nov 04 - 03:14 AM
Acme 04 Nov 04 - 10:32 AM
Rapparee 04 Nov 04 - 10:13 AM
Acme 03 Nov 04 - 11:42 PM
Rapparee 03 Nov 04 - 09:42 AM
Amos 03 Nov 04 - 09:37 AM
GUEST,Tweed 03 Nov 04 - 09:10 AM
Rapparee 02 Nov 04 - 07:00 PM
Rustic Rebel 02 Nov 04 - 06:53 PM
Amos 02 Nov 04 - 06:32 PM
Rapparee 02 Nov 04 - 06:10 PM
Amos 02 Nov 04 - 01:26 PM
GUEST,Tweed 02 Nov 04 - 01:23 PM
Amos 02 Nov 04 - 01:11 PM
Acme 02 Nov 04 - 11:30 AM
MMario 02 Nov 04 - 10:56 AM
GUEST,Tweed 02 Nov 04 - 10:39 AM
Rapparee 02 Nov 04 - 09:40 AM
Rapparee 01 Nov 04 - 05:16 PM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 04:58 PM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 04:42 PM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 04:26 PM
MMario 01 Nov 04 - 04:24 PM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 04:15 PM
Rapparee 01 Nov 04 - 03:35 PM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 03:30 PM
MMario 01 Nov 04 - 02:49 PM
Rapparee 01 Nov 04 - 02:29 PM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 02:11 PM
MMario 01 Nov 04 - 02:04 PM
Tweed 01 Nov 04 - 01:41 PM
MMario 01 Nov 04 - 12:04 PM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 11:58 AM
Rapparee 01 Nov 04 - 11:57 AM
Amos 01 Nov 04 - 11:50 AM
MMario 01 Nov 04 - 11:49 AM
Rapparee 01 Nov 04 - 11:38 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Nov 04 - 07:58 PM

Ah, Pat, why are you telling us this? I'm the Director of a public library and there seem to be more librarians than any other profession in the Mudcat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Patrick Henry
Date: 07 Nov 04 - 01:37 PM

American Library Association:

"The freedom to read is essential to our democracy. It is continuously under attack? These actions apparently arise from a view that our national tradition of free expression is no longer valid; that censorship and suppression are needed to avoid the subversion of politics and the corruption of morals.
 ...
Why is Intellectual Freedom Important? Intellectual freedom is the basis of our democratic system. We expect our people to be self-governors. But to do so responsibly, our citizenry must be well informed. Libraries provide the ideas and information, in a variety of formats, to allow people to inform themselves....

We trust Americans to recognize propaganda and misinformation, and to make their own decisions about what they read and believe."

And that's no BS!

Pat


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Nov 04 - 12:14 AM

Lemme get home and see what I can do....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 06 Nov 04 - 11:37 PM

I did a bit of a search, and came across an article about Bruce's beard, but nothing current. Nothing in Switchboard.com


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Nov 04 - 07:21 PM

Have some of this brew, too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 06 Nov 04 - 11:03 AM

Yes mom, have some of this - parallax lager


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Nov 04 - 10:00 AM

Here, Mom. Have a glass of beer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Nov 04 - 06:42 PM

I sent him an email (to the email address on his Profile page) and haven't heard anything.

I could probably track down his phone number, I suppose.... Hate to bother someone, though.

I'm not really Sir j0hn from Hull.

I'm really not myself, either.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 05 Nov 04 - 04:55 PM

Well I checked on Bee-dubya-Ell. His last post was Sept. 13th and he was talking like he might have to pack up and head for the hills because of hurricane Ivan. He thought it might take his electric out and he mentioned Arkansas. Hopefully they're alright.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 05 Nov 04 - 04:49 PM

Well now Mr. John from Hull that's much better.

Stilly, I was throwing around the hay bails full of cow turds only directly to Mr. John Ashcroft, who incidentally can't seem to remember who he really is at the moment. I would never call my friends such words unless they truely deserved it or belonged to the asshole club of the month.

I still wonder about Bee-Dub though. I think I'll check his last post also, maybe he left a clue.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Nov 04 - 01:43 PM

Oh, poop. Alright, I'm not really George W. Bush, either.

I'm really Sir j0hn from Hull and leader of the free world.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Nov 04 - 10:52 AM

I have been wondering where he is as well. He's not in one of my prisons or in custody, at least not that I know about.

Oh, heck. I'm not really John Ashcroft.

I'm really George W. Bush.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Nov 04 - 10:40 AM

Rustic, I'm assuming you're addressing the uncloseted Ashcroft, and not myself or the Absent Amos, when you throw around the recycled bails of hay moniker? But you're wise to bring to our attention the absence of BWL. I'll have to go look for one of the substantive threads and ask pertinent questions.

There was something else I was going to ask--it has slipped past--just on the tip of my tongue. . .

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 05 Nov 04 - 03:14 AM

You deciving, manipulating sack of big ol" horseshit. How do you even dare to come across as a friend of MOAB when in reality your are nothing but a big ol" sack of horseshit.
(This is where I insert some kind of smile in type print, you sack of horseshit pretend John A. sshole want to run my life but if you think you can and I don't you won't asshole)

I love everybody!
I love people
I love, love
I love you.


Anyone know where Bee-dubya-ell is? Is he okay? Did he get blown away, by a hurricane?

Changing the subject, not only do I want to reveal that I am doing exercises to make my tounge longer and stronger, but I am also realizing that I can be a strong tounge if anyone wants to listen to it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 04 Nov 04 - 10:32 AM

Looks like our pal Amos has skedaddled fer a piece of quiet time. . . (no one is ever going to pay me to write regional dialog!) so we're gonna have to heft this thread ourselves for a while.

Good thing yesterday was gray, sodden, and cold around here. It exactly suited my mood. Today is glorious, but that's because life must go on, and it's in the clear light of day in which we can see what must be done in the near future. And for Amos--"Gone Fishin'" may be that something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Nov 04 - 10:13 AM

Now that the Pressydent is once more one of the Elect, I must take off my mask, strip off my costume, pull my sword outa the stone, and reveal to all and sundry the answer to their heartfelt question. Specifically, I must reveal my Secret Identity in answer to your oft-asked question, "Who the hell was that Masked Man who shot holes in my barn, consensually ravished my sister and/or daugher, broke my mixer, stepped on my cat, tripped over my puppy, trampled my garden, and whose horse crapped all over my porch and front walk? And why doesn't he take his horse to vet for treatment of those scours, anyway?"

Well, yeah, that really two questions, but they are oft-asked. Especially the last one.

I will now reveal my secret identity.

I am, in reality, not the shy, retiring, modest, bespectaculed, sunk-chested, round-shouldered, wimpy, tongue-tied, flatulent, hermit of a librarian I have pretended to be.

No. I stand revealed before you now as the Champion of Truth, Justice, Good For All Peoples Everywhere, Mercy, Caring, and All Things Good, Bright, and Beautiful. Yes, I admit it. I am really


(drums and trumpets flourish!)












John Ashcroft, Attorney General of the United State of America.



And my agents are knocking down or on your doors as you read this.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Nov 04 - 11:42 PM

Different animal in the White House altogether now, darnit. Not a royal dolphin (dauphin?) but a royal ass.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Nov 04 - 09:42 AM

Good. I wanna be Veep of the Money, Secrete Police and the Military. Amos can be Veep of the WW* Grope.





*Wimps and Wussies.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Nov 04 - 09:37 AM

I allus wanned to be a Dolphin!!! ANd now a Royale one!! That's so neat!!

Miz Rustic, I believe the role of Advisor on Things Unadvisable will become one of the critical roles of our generation and very important and I commend you for naming the unnameable position and reaching for the unreachable salary this way. Applause, kudos and paradoxes be unto you for this Manifestation of Virtue!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Tweed
Date: 03 Nov 04 - 09:10 AM

You CAN botfh be veeps in parlellel if that iz yore desire!    ....and since in four more years the country will be so dumbed down, the time will then be right.

Yaz,for I, TweedwhoisasloKhandu will rain in parlellel az KHING OBV AMERICA!!!


Rainpeer and Amos will be adopted and becomb The Royal Dolphines and thus bof be in line for the thron should subverbsiebves or obther miscreents ob simbilar ilk cause Our untimely demise.

Bark and let all Harolds sing!

Long libve, KhanduwhoisasloTweedwhoisasloKhanduwhoisasloTweedwhoisasloKhandu!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 07:00 PM

Stand up, hook up, shuffle to the door
Be sure you're wearing a chute before you're out the door....

Why can't we both be veeps?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 06:53 PM

This just might take a revolution and I'm in on it.
(Get up-stand up, don't give up the fight.)
I personally elect myself as advisor of things that are not advisable.
Rustic.. AOTTANA


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 06:32 PM

Well, why? I need a Veep, and if you don't want to be my Veep, I can be YOUR Veep. I yam easy, cuz I know how Fate works and either one will be fine!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 06:10 PM

Is there any reason I can't run against Amos, but still within the same party?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 01:26 PM

Sure. And if everyone knows that everything out of my mouth is BS, I have no problem speaking my mind freely! LOL


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Tweed
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 01:23 PM

Amos, I hearby nominate you as MOAB Party Candidate for President. Yore glibbnefs obv tong and rawpierre-like wit is just what the country needs. And you can talk franch wif the best obv them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 01:11 PM

Mom,

I know I have been vehement, vociferous, insistent, sometimes raucous, adamant, irrepressible, ineluctable, loud and demanding in my remarks about the campaign. I promise to stop after today (unless the Republicans win). Being a gracious winner is in my breeding.

I apologize for all those whom I have bored, annoyed, upset, disturbed, harassed, crushed, beleaguered or irritated with my rhetoric. I can only plead that a very important political turn is ahead, and we must be the best we can be for it. That makes Kerry's election terribly important.

Thank for being understanding.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 11:30 AM

Good point, MMario! Suttee is not on my list of "things to do today."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 10:56 AM

of course there is no flaming on MOAB - the methane level is so high that it would be self-immolation if it did occur. Self-preservation is one commonality of most posters.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Tweed
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 10:39 AM

Rawpierrez, we are allus nice to one anobvther in MOAB. I bleve that it is the only thread whar flaming never occurs!

There is safety in BS, it is a place of no discipline and anarchy. I am thinking that along with the Green party thar should be a MOAB party for 2008, whar everthing said and sworn to iz automatically known to be pure BS! Tharfore, ar nation could save hunderds obv dollars by nebver needing to investigate ennything thet the MOAB President trotted out on the TV, az all Americans wuld know az soon as he pulled out the maps and grapphs thet it were all a big danged lie and not become insensed by nothin' that didn't turn out later.

I surprise myself sometimes and am sure thet I surprise you all as well wif these gems obv wisdom thet sometimes just pore outta me!

Tweed


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Nov 04 - 09:40 AM

Good morning, Mother. It's Election Day in the USA.

The BS here has been outstanding, hasn't it? Excellent quality, and good quantity. The ambience is truly wonderful, the dishes are clean, the floors swept, and there are no little bits of food between the tines of the forks. Amos uses the spitoon, Little Hawk keeps his hands outside the covers, and even the toothpicks are unused!

But Mom, there is bad news. But there is also good news.

The bad news is that this is Election Day and that means the last day for the BS that has been spewing out of televisions, radios, newspapers, and even certain threads at the Mudcat Cafe.

The good news, dear MOAB, is that this is Election Day and that means the last day for the BS that has been spewing out of televisions, radios, newspapers, and even certain threads at the Mudcat Cafe. Of course, it wasn't of such quality as to appear here.

Perhaps tomorrow we can all be nice to each other again, huh, Mom?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 05:16 PM

"Beef Pattie" was a girl I knew in college. So did the soccer team, the band, most of the largest men's dorm, and the local National Guard unit (the other one).

Her brother, "Pork Patttie" was quite a hit with the women's dorms, i understand.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 04:58 PM

What about this one, then?? Hey?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 04:42 PM

DEBUNKING FACT 6: McDonald's releases a letter from the U.S. Secretary of Agriculture in 1982, attesting to McDonald's burger's pure beef content. It was used as proof in a rebuttal press conference on October 1 of that year, against the rumor.

Now, I grant you, that was 22 years ago. They've had time to really change things. But to what? Kangaroo meat??


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 04:26 PM

Beef patties are patties made from beef, a generic term for meaty substances deriving from cows, including, of course, gristle, chips of bone, the occasional rat's tail, and perhaps a tennis ball or two but those are accidentals.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 04:24 PM

all Mc Donald's burgers come from cows? c'mon Amos - pull the other one! Who would believe *THAT*! unless of course "beef patties" is a euphemism.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 04:15 PM

Why sure they are, Rap!! 'Course!! What d'ye think? The biggest hamburger maker in the known universe is going to cheat its customers? That wouldn't be very nice, would it??

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 03:35 PM

McDonald's burgers are made from cow meat? Boy, you coulda fooled me!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 03:30 PM

Some cows becvome Mc Donald's burgers; all Mc Donald's burgers come from cows. But not all cows become McDonald's burgers.

Thus "If M then C" is true but "If C then M" is not necessarily true.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 02:49 PM

well - cows sh*t into straw - which is primarily cellulose - which is what most McDonalds burgers appear to be made of (by taste if nothing else) - but not all sh*t and straw are made into mcdonalds burgers.

so some showtunes are bs but not all bs is showtunes - or something along those lines.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 02:29 PM

No, I don't.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 02:11 PM

But not all BS is made into showtunes. It's like cows and McDOnalds, if you see what I mean.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 02:04 PM

I object! The seperation of showtunes and BS is fundamentally impossible! Most showtunes ARE BS!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 01:41 PM

Good News from Mzippi. Khning Khrapshoot is recovered form his malfeasense and it is said to be due to the abut-face here in MOAB. After chasteming my fellow moabits regarding the sepamation obv church, show tunes and BS, the resploss wabz obverwhelmage and true BS havs come back to the foreskin oncet againe! The khning sends hibz thanks and will award you all wif titles obv some sort when his faculties are back to normalment.

And Amos said:
Geeze,man, get a grip!! The prvenance is not different...

Wonderful, just wonderful.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 12:04 PM

The Seneca Indians spoke Latin?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 11:58 AM

Geeze,man, get a grip!! The prvenance is not different because it comes from BOTH Late and Classic Latin, but because it is the word for "fruit" not "apple".

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 11:57 AM

Good Sirs, I did not study degenerate "Late Latin" but the pure, Classical language of Caesar and Cicero, of Seneca and Terence. Oh, yes, I have dabbled in the bastardy of "Church" or "Ecclesiastical" Latin, but I much prefer to leave the memory of such misspent hours buried with other such debris.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 11:50 AM

POME (AMerican Heritage Dictionary)

NOUN: A fleshy fruit, such as an apple, pear, or quince, having several seed chambers and an outer fleshy part largely derived from the hypanthium. Also called false fruit.

ETYMOLOGY: Middle English, from Old French, apple, fruit, from Vulgar Latin *pma, from neuter pl. of Late Latin pmum, from Latin, fruit.

I think I have been vindicated in my suspicion.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 11:49 AM

Main Entry: pome
Pronunciation: 'pOm
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Middle French pome, pomme apple, pome, ball, ultimately from Late Latin pomum
: a fleshy fruit (as an apple or pear) consisting of an outer thickened fleshy layer and a central core with usually five seeds enclosed in a capsule


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Nov 04 - 11:38 AM

My inadequate memory of small Latin and less Greek reminds me that "apple" in Latin is "malus" -- as in "Ab malus ad ovo" ("From apples to eggs," or as we would say, "From soup to nuts"). "Malic acid" is derived from this, as it is the acid made from apples just as formic acid is made from ants (formus = ant).

I do seem to live in a library....


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