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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 17 Jun 04 - 02:01 PM
Little Hawk 17 Jun 04 - 02:00 PM
Amos 17 Jun 04 - 01:36 PM
MMario 17 Jun 04 - 01:29 PM
Rapparee 17 Jun 04 - 01:27 PM
Amos 16 Jun 04 - 11:54 PM
Little Hawk 16 Jun 04 - 10:04 PM
Amos 16 Jun 04 - 02:52 PM
Rapparee 16 Jun 04 - 02:42 PM
MMario 16 Jun 04 - 12:37 PM
Acme 16 Jun 04 - 12:29 PM
MMario 16 Jun 04 - 11:21 AM
Acme 16 Jun 04 - 11:10 AM
42 16 Jun 04 - 07:00 AM
Amos 15 Jun 04 - 11:30 PM
GUEST,Harald Bearshirt 15 Jun 04 - 10:01 PM
Amos 15 Jun 04 - 06:45 PM
Little Hawk 15 Jun 04 - 06:35 PM
CarolC 15 Jun 04 - 06:26 PM
Amos 15 Jun 04 - 06:00 PM
Little Hawk 15 Jun 04 - 05:55 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 04 - 05:20 PM
Amos 15 Jun 04 - 04:33 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 04 - 04:11 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 04 - 04:10 PM
GUEST,MMario 15 Jun 04 - 03:46 PM
CarolC 15 Jun 04 - 03:37 PM
GUEST,MMario 15 Jun 04 - 03:20 PM
Amos 15 Jun 04 - 03:12 PM
Rapparee 15 Jun 04 - 02:55 PM
Amos 15 Jun 04 - 02:46 PM
CarolC 15 Jun 04 - 01:52 PM
GUEST 15 Jun 04 - 01:07 PM
Amos 15 Jun 04 - 12:16 AM
Little Hawk 15 Jun 04 - 12:10 AM
Rustic Rebel 14 Jun 04 - 11:25 PM
CarolC 14 Jun 04 - 11:05 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Jun 04 - 10:49 PM
Amos 14 Jun 04 - 10:43 PM
GUEST,Harald Bearshirt 14 Jun 04 - 10:27 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Jun 04 - 01:09 AM
GUEST,Harald Bearshirt 13 Jun 04 - 10:45 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 04 - 08:27 PM
Amos 13 Jun 04 - 07:06 PM
Rapparee 13 Jun 04 - 06:33 PM
Amos 13 Jun 04 - 03:48 PM
khandu 13 Jun 04 - 03:01 PM
GUEST,Harald Bearshirt 13 Jun 04 - 10:05 AM
Rapparee 12 Jun 04 - 05:30 PM
Acme 12 Jun 04 - 04:18 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jun 04 - 02:01 PM

Okay, I see. Shatner is a poor, withered, old man, his skin sere and blotched and white from imprisonment in a moldy damp dungeon, one rotten tooth left in his blackened, scurvied gums with which he attempts to consume the swill he is allowed. And LH parades the name around like a will-o'-the-wisp, deceiving and misleading those who might follow.

Got it.

Perhaps a "Free Shatner" movement is needed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Jun 04 - 02:00 PM

Are you implying that I couldn't survive without your puny attention?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Jun 04 - 01:36 PM

There is a real Shatner, whimpering and withered in the corner somewhere. The image that LH keeps trotting out is purely a figment and nothing to do witht he actuality. It is this will o'the wisp that LH uses to lure people into paying attention to him.

Do not be fooled.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 17 Jun 04 - 01:29 PM

nah - couldn't be. BS is obviously older the LH. And LH come up with much better characters (and more believable ones) as witness 'chongo'


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jun 04 - 01:27 PM

Amos -- are you implying that William Shatner was created by LH, like the "Wizard" was created by the dude behind the curtain in the Emerald Palace? That Shatner is Little Hawk (and, of course, vice-versa)?

Oh, my.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 11:54 PM

I see right through you, Little Hawk. I am not going to chase your puffed-up straw tiger. YOU are the very little man behind the curtain, creating this meretricious and pusillanimous fantasy-icon in the hopes that others will confuse it with reality. You fool no-one with your overblown hyperbole. You should get an honest job as a journalist for Fox news. Perhaps your friend Shatner will offer to give you a reference as a good PR-smoke-and-mirrors man.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 10:04 PM

You could hire William Shatner as a consultant on practically anything. He has a chameleon-like ability to match the terrain perfectly and yet remain inimitably and unforgettably Shatnerian at all times. He is like a force of Nature...ineffable, unstoppable, indescribable, irresistible.








Heh! (I can see Amos going slowly mad as he reads the above...)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 02:52 PM

Reg'lar humbucker!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 02:42 PM

Blow job????


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 12:37 PM

in Miss Congeniality I was hoping BS would catch the bomb and get blown up...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 12:29 PM

No, this movie came out a year or two ago, with Sandra Bullock. I don't remember what the cop show was, but you can look it up in the IMDB.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 11:21 AM

What was the stupid cop movie that BS played himself in? (cop and actor doing a tv show; BS hired as a consultant (god knows why))


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 11:10 AM

So that means you watched the movie Miss Congeniality, right? Funny thing about that, Shatner was probably playing himself straight and Candy Bergen was hamming it up for her role. :) Michael Caine was pretty good.

SRS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: 42
Date: 16 Jun 04 - 07:00 AM

finally saw our friend W.S. in his perfect role...smarmy beauty pageant host...he was perfect! almost as fine a performance as the "Rant"

J


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 11:30 PM

Thanks, friend Harald!! Consider it as good as done!! Ho!!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Harald Bearshirt
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 10:01 PM

Ho!

What is this dog biscuit? Amos, if you are a man, why do you not cleave this Little Hawk from helm to gullet? And if you do not like this actor person, stake him out with a Blood Eagle and let Huginn and Muninn carry the news of it to Valaskjalf's master.

If you are truly offended, there can be no kin retribution.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 06:45 PM

See? See?? You can see it in the way he types that little laugh of his!! Orillia shmeelia!! He's a dog biscuit.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 06:35 PM

Heh! Heh!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 06:26 PM

Little Hawk never lies. He's from Orillia.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 06:00 PM

Hollywood my sweet Anglo-Saxon tushie!! Little Hawk, you are lying through your teeth! You just made that up!! Admit it!!

(Why do I let this &)+_@#$@$#^^&)(* annoy me?)


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 05:55 PM

I spoke to Bill about post 3500. He said, "Naww...I'm going to go easy on them and let someone else have it this time." He is a model of generosity and compassion which it would behoove us all to follow. The Man is virtually egoless. It's a very rare thing in Hollywood.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 05:20 PM

Hey, when I last trod the boards it was with top billing in a work by George Bernard Shaw, no less!

Androcles and the Lion. Cast in order of appearance: a lion....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 04:33 PM

Congratulations to all MOABites, everywhere, and to ou rown heroic Rapaire for defending the 3500th post from the encroaching talons of all has-been wannabe actors (other than himself, of course!). :>))

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 04:11 PM

3,500! I did it! Me!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 04:10 PM

...99


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 03:46 PM

as if the Atlanta airport wasn't dangerous enough already!

(I really shouldn't talk - since the time I was there they gave my sister's entire plane the wrong gate number for their transfer - and we ended up literally RUNNING to the correct gate DOWN the up escalators with her baggage carried up over our heads)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 03:37 PM

First (and only) time I've seen one in use myself (in real life, not on video) was at the airport in Atlanta and as I described in my previous post, it was being operated by a security guard who was zipping through the lounge area/food court at a fairly high rate of speed.

When I saw it in operation, it made me think of a horseless chariot.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 03:20 PM

I doubt I could ride one. And I doubt I'd want to be around anyone ELSE riding one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 03:12 PM

Did you catch the stills of George Bush falling off of one? Automated gyros can only deal with so much ineptitude... Some guys can't operate a toilet seat reliably. Who put him in the driver's seat??? LOL!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 02:55 PM

First time I've seen the Segway in action. Reminds me of the "unicycles" Heinlein wrote about in "The Roads Must Roll."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 02:46 PM

That is one beeyootiful piece of technolgoical development...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 01:52 PM

AND WE'll Roll the old segway along
We'll roll the old segway along
we'll roll the old segway along and
we'll all get run over by security guards at the airport going 20 miles an hour through the food court on their way to goodness knows where...

(click on "Watch Segway HT in Action" in the upper right corner)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 01:07 PM

Oh a little less of shatner wouldn't do us any harm
a little less of shatner wouldn't do us any harm
a little less of shatner wouldn't do us any harm

and we'll all hang on behind....

AND WE'll Roll the old chariot along
We'll roll the old chariot along
we'll roll the old chariout along and
we'll all hang on behind.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 12:16 AM

ELeven for the eleven positions, oh....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jun 04 - 12:10 AM

12 posts to Shatner....
12 posts to Shatner....
12 posts to Shatner....
And we'll all get ripped!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 14 Jun 04 - 11:25 PM

But, but, hard old Bearshit is really funny.
Bee-dubya please don't apologize, I thought you were really funny.
Really funny is as good as it gets.
Really funny bullshit is better than, as good as it gets.
Taking any bullshit as intended, is really, really the best as it will ever be, and consider it an honor if you will, to be getting the best bullshit given or getting around here.

Hard old bearshit is a stumbling block in the woods. We can and will walk around it, unless we fall first.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 14 Jun 04 - 11:05 PM

Odin's eternal tool

Interesting possibilities with that one...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Jun 04 - 10:49 PM

Thanks for the invitation, Harald Bearshirt. I apologize for misreading your name earlier. Mild dyslexia and dirty glasses, you know. Anyway, I've sworn off drinking and wenching but the viking sounds interesting. I've never viked before. Do I get to wear one of those helmets with horns on it? Maybe get to chunk throw a few spears? (I keep forgetting it's not politically correct to say "chunk" and "spear" in the same sentence.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Jun 04 - 10:43 PM

Beats working for the military industrial complex and fighting clot-brained Republicans!! I'm signing up if Bear Shit will have me. This adds a new dimension to the BS of which we are the Mother...

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Harald Bearshirt
Date: 14 Jun 04 - 10:27 PM

Do you mock Harald Bearshirt?

No, I do not think you would do that. It is really very funny, Hard Old Bearshit. You may call me that.

Hard Old Bearshit. I like that.

Bee Dubya Ell, your name is as funny as Hard Old Bearshit. I like you. Wouldst like to go a-wenching or a-viking? I have Waveskimmer and twenty oarsmen, good with steel sword and bearded axe. You shall have a full share of drink or food or loot!

Hard Old Bearshit has said it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Jun 04 - 01:09 AM

I would like to be the first to bid welcome to our guest, Hard Old Bearshit. Since this thread is almost entirely about gooey fresh bullshit, it's refreshing to hear a contrasting viewpoint.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Harald Bearshirt
Date: 13 Jun 04 - 10:45 PM

By Njorddattar's twin tits, but this is a mighty place! When I stumbled upon it I thought it nought but like Ginnungagap, but it is filled with such song and wisdom as might found in Breidablik itself!

Come! Let us drink and sing! Einherjar, raise a toast! And those who will not drink with Harald Bearshirt will be sent as emissaries to the Master of Freki and Geri, dispatched thereto by Bearshirt's Longtooth!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 04 - 08:27 PM

What, you've never heard of the Ragnarok cockroach? The Dutch Yggdrasil Borer? Mjollnir Beetles? Goodness gracious!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 04 - 07:06 PM

Oh, right, Rapaire, he's gonna start discussing insects in Norse mythology next, right? Yeah, yeah....


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jun 04 - 06:33 PM

Maybe he meant "entomology."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jun 04 - 03:48 PM

Khandu, you whacko sunofabitch, what the fock are you doing with your head that it keeps ending up stuck up your butt? I mean here you start this whole kingdom, all these hijinks, the longest thread known to man, yadda-yadda-yadda and then you disappear practically forever and when you finally surface all you can do is intone a lesson about ... ETYMOLOGY?? I Mean, what is wrong with this picture??? Jeeezus Crissmas, man!! At least talk about something sensible like icthyology. Whatever. How about explaining where the fock you've been all this time? We can parse our our own linguistic archetypes! Whassup wit' you?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: khandu
Date: 13 Jun 04 - 03:01 PM

The etomology of "berzerk' is "bear shirt"

k


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Harald Bearshirt
Date: 13 Jun 04 - 10:05 AM

HO! What have we here? Berries ripe for plucking, by Odin's eternal tool!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 04 - 05:30 PM

We got Absinthe, Anisette, athol bose, akavit, Amoretto, Aragnac, Brandy, Benedictine, beer, Bourbon, Bailey's, cider, Creme de whatever you want, Cognac, Curacao, Drambuie, daminana, eau de toilette, Everclear, elderberry wine, Frangelico, Galliano, Grand Marinier, Goldwasser, Guinness, gin, hazelnut, Irish, Japanese plum, Jaegermeister, kirschwasser, Kummel, Kahlua, limoncello, Liqueur 44, margaritas, madrono, melissa, noisette, nocine, orange, Pernod, prickly pear (thorns left in), rum, rhubarb wine, quince wine, sambuca (both black and white), Scotch whiskey, shrub-rum, sloe gin, tequila, Tanqueray, Trappistine, Tia Maria, vodka, vermouth (dry AND sweet), whiskey and whisky, wine, xylene, yellow Chartreuse, and zammu.

If it ain't listed, we've still got it, 'cause I didn't list everything we got.

Mix a shot of each together and drink the result right down. Not only won't you sober up for at least a week, the hangover will last long after you're dead.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Jun 04 - 04:18 PM

We should take this to the tavern--they have more types of booze over there than on this thread. :)


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