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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

keberoxu 25 Dec 16 - 08:24 PM
keberoxu 25 Dec 16 - 11:08 AM
Acme 25 Dec 16 - 10:56 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Dec 16 - 08:36 AM
Amos 24 Dec 16 - 10:51 PM
Rapparee 24 Dec 16 - 09:37 PM
Amos 24 Dec 16 - 02:29 PM
Rapparee 24 Dec 16 - 10:31 AM
Amos 24 Dec 16 - 01:19 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 23 Dec 16 - 09:47 PM
Rapparee 23 Dec 16 - 02:20 PM
Rapparee 23 Dec 16 - 08:55 AM
Amos 23 Dec 16 - 03:16 AM
Acme 22 Dec 16 - 09:47 PM
Rapparee 22 Dec 16 - 09:10 PM
Rapparee 22 Dec 16 - 04:37 PM
Rapparee 21 Dec 16 - 09:28 PM
gnu 21 Dec 16 - 02:45 PM
Rapparee 21 Dec 16 - 10:10 AM
Rapparee 20 Dec 16 - 11:10 PM
Rapparee 20 Dec 16 - 09:43 AM
Amos 20 Dec 16 - 12:29 AM
Amos 20 Dec 16 - 12:25 AM
Amos 19 Dec 16 - 11:27 PM
Acme 19 Dec 16 - 08:37 PM
Donuel 19 Dec 16 - 07:09 PM
Rapparee 19 Dec 16 - 03:33 AM
Rapparee 18 Dec 16 - 09:48 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 18 Dec 16 - 09:35 PM
keberoxu 18 Dec 16 - 08:16 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 18 Dec 16 - 08:07 PM
Amos 18 Dec 16 - 03:53 PM
Amos 18 Dec 16 - 03:50 PM
Amos 18 Dec 16 - 03:48 PM
gnu 18 Dec 16 - 04:52 AM
gnu 17 Dec 16 - 05:02 PM
Rapparee 17 Dec 16 - 04:16 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Dec 16 - 02:48 PM
Acme 17 Dec 16 - 10:44 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Dec 16 - 10:21 PM
Rapparee 16 Dec 16 - 09:01 PM
keberoxu 16 Dec 16 - 08:28 PM
Rapparee 16 Dec 16 - 06:23 PM
gnu 16 Dec 16 - 04:13 PM
Rapparee 16 Dec 16 - 10:05 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 15 Dec 16 - 01:35 PM
Rapparee 15 Dec 16 - 10:01 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 15 Dec 16 - 06:12 AM
Rapparee 14 Dec 16 - 08:54 PM
gnu 14 Dec 16 - 12:53 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 25 Dec 16 - 08:24 PM

Listen up, folks;
Rapparee is going to be preoccupied for the next seven days or more, so it's up to the rest of us to keep MOM buoyant.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 25 Dec 16 - 11:08 AM

Gnu, I hope the results are everything you desire and nothing that you dread.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Dec 16 - 10:56 AM

It may be xmas today, but I still have to mow the lawn (I'll wait till afternoon, when everyone has departed for the movie theaters to see the latest blockbusters). Our holiday is deferred until later in the week.

I must admit that up and leaving the balmy shores of San Diego to race east to the fraught mess that is North Carolina does seem like a retrograde move. Register to vote as soon as possible - that might make all the difference!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Dec 16 - 08:36 AM

Merry Christmas, Mom!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Dec 16 - 10:51 PM

Not bad, really, except for the grim macabre undercurrents . Really, it must be brutally cold up where Rapaire sits and strives his grimly rhymes to cast. I imagine his poor head, his desk, and his humble bed are just covered in rime.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Dec 16 - 09:37 PM

Now is the winter of our discontent
Made glorious summer by this son of Jessup;
And all the clouds that lour'd upon our house
In the deep bosom of the San Diego ocean are sunk.
Now are his hands bound with victorious laurels;
His bruised and calloused fingers hung up for monuments;
His stern songs changed to merry meanderings,
His dreadful pickings to delightful measures.
Grim-visaged Euterpe hath smooth'd his wrinkled melodies;
And now, instead of using dreadful chords
To fright the souls of other musicians,
He capers nimbly in a lady's chamber
To the lascivious pleasing of a banjo.

         -- R. I. Lockitor, Sharp Flats Are Natural
      (Merde-on-head, Shropshire: Lascivious Caperings Press, 1588).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Dec 16 - 02:29 PM

The winter of our sad dementia
Now has shown its mark
And rudely claimed its place
Amongst the ills of men. Now
Has our Brother Michael shewn
His cracked and frozen spirit to us all,
His heart full-frozen in cruel Winter's thrall
And all that once was kind, or nice
Has fled him, in a flight from ice.
Thus has a noble spirit left behind
Only the shell of a much, much younger mind
That spits and wails, demeaning honest folk
Discoloring their discourse with crude bathroom jokes.
Go to! Go to! Your soul has not yet died,
Go seek the solace of your fireside
And when in warmth and comfort are made whole,
Return and show thine higher, better soul!

Oliver Jakes Philler
April, 1813
Rhymes for Raparacious Reasoning
Diddle, Squat and Dripp, pubs.,
Micturition-on-Monde, Essex


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Dec 16 - 10:31 AM

Two-four-six-eight!
Let's help Amos pull his freight!

Eight-six-four-two!
Oh, he has to make a poo....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Dec 16 - 01:19 AM

I remember it well. Now Rapp, you have to take responsibility for removing yourself from civilization. It's not my fault you decided to live right up by the North Pole. Really!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Dec 16 - 09:47 PM

And I call dibs on 5551212, though we have a while to wait before that one comes around.

In case you've forgotten, 555-1212 was the phone number for long distance information back in the days before cell phones made the difference between a local and long distance call totally irrelevant.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Dec 16 - 02:20 PM

Snagged 55455! I'm good, I am.

And I have dibs on 55555, so there!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Dec 16 - 08:55 AM

But not off I-15 to visit me. Alas, no one does, except Deckman once.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Dec 16 - 03:16 AM

Many thanks for all your encouraging and anatomical remarks, dear sibs. So, I was thoroughly exhausted after flying up to Oaklad and loading up a truck and driving back down but no rest for the wicked. Today it wa sdisclosures, a termite inspection, a scramble for handymen to do some minor repaires, and on and on. In spite of it all I went and performed at my favorite area watering hole.

Tomorrow I start planning the day log of our odyssey east-bound which begins very much as Stilly describes it. Dates to follow. Definitely planning to drop off the 20 to see you!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Dec 16 - 09:47 PM

Amos, are you planning to dawdle on the way cross-country? Will you be part of an entourage of vehicles with people and canine and stuff? Trailers? How long do you think it will take to drive from San Diego to Fort Worth? Hwy 8 runs into 10 and in Texas that runs into 20. That is the most direct route to my location (I live about 3 blocks south of I-20; no difficulty finding me once you get here.) The drive from here to Tucson is a very long day, or a reasonable drive to Van Horn, then the rest of the way to Tucson is only a few hours. You'll have to figure out how long from SD to Tucson, and if you want to visit any attractions on the way. I would suggest a meal in New Mexico in La Mesilla at La Posta (just south of Las Cruces). Van Horn, TX, has a kind of oddball place called Chuy's (not related to any chain by the same name). There is a McAlister's deli in Midland, TX, about the only place I would recommend there. Lots of good food here in the Metroplex so you may want to plan a day or two for museums and restaurants.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Dec 16 - 09:10 PM

C'mon, Amos! You can do it! Taking a couple of wagon across Death Valley isn't anything! I did it without a canteen! Then there's Arizona and New Mexico and Texas, but the Apaches and Comanches are taking it easy and you'll probably make it okay if you have a cavalry escort.

Then it's Louisiana, floating across the Mississippi, crossing Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, Minnesota (if you do that you're lost), South Carolina, and then you're there! You could even drop down and visit with Bee-Dubya-Ell! Khandu might even be possible! And Tweed! Bobert and Dani and Janie and all sorts of people will be there to welcome you long about July when the wagons get there!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Dec 16 - 04:37 PM

At this very moment Mom is exactly about 420 minutes -- a mere 25,200 seconds -- from the Great Pit! And it is left to me, and me alone, to rescue her! Oh, that I was here to do so! May your choice of deity, if any, be thanked!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 16 - 09:28 PM

Yeah, I gotta get it done too. But not right now. I gotta help Amos move to East Carolina or somewhere. I'll do this by offering him encouragement.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 21 Dec 16 - 02:45 PM

And so it's begun. The die is cast. I have just ingested the three little pills. The instructions say that the first, ahhh, err, well, trip to see a friend off to the coast will take place in 1 to 6 hours. At five hours hence, I shall begin to drink 2 litres of a fruit flavoured mixture which I must consume within 1:10 hours. I am advised by the directions that the trips to the coast will subside in about two hours after that. Then, I shall arrive at Clinic E of the Moncton Hospital before 7:30AM. At 8AM, I will be pumped full of mind altering drugs and subsequently have a hose from an air compressor shoved in my ass and turned on at Category FUCK ME! Ensuing will be the insertion of a mechanically directionally manipulated cable with a camera and snipper on the end of it. The doctor, a mere pup in my estimation, will then proceed to navigate my alimentary canal in search of nasty things. As if all of this is not nasty enough already.

It's overdue. I had an innuendo exam near 9 years ago. The doc snipped polyps. No problems. Then, two years later, he declared my a five year man. Then, after he was 25 years in the OR, they pulled his licence to make room for new blood. New blood didn't get his files. I complained. I got a referral. It will be nearly nine years since someone b/flew up my ass and had a look. I should have married Maryse, a nurse. She's a uni prof emeritus now with a doctorate. She'd take of my ass. She... nevermind.BTW... the instructions said clear fluids all day today and said "ale". wELL, GINGER ALE BUT I PREFER REAL ALE. Oh dear. Capslock. My meds are kickin' in.

By tomorrow at this time, it will hopefully be all be just a fart in the wind.

Oh dear. The growling has begun. Those little pills are mighty.

I hope this shit doesn't offend anyone. >;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Dec 16 - 10:10 AM

Mom! You've fallen into that vat of tetramethylenediamine again!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 16 - 11:10 PM

Again, I rescue Mom.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 16 - 09:43 AM

Unless, of course, the rigging was snarled and couldn't be furled. Of course, the mast could have been cut away. But I was up on the yard and "fell into the silent tob below" (as Amos said). Of course, I was off course because I was supposed to fall into the concrete at Boulder, but those winds can be pretty darn fierce.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Dec 16 - 12:29 AM

However, I should point out that the notion of "going aloft to furl the mainsail in a blow" does not usually apply to schooners. Schooners are typically gaff-rigged or fore-and-aft rigged, furling from below. This makes it clear that whoever channeled these lyrics was not a s clear medium and was interjecting his own confused analytic noise to obscure the true signal.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Dec 16 - 12:25 AM

I yield mew as to the misheard lyrics to "The Highwayman", which should be:

I was a highwayman.
Along the coach roads I did ride
With sword and pistol by my side
Many a young maid lost her baubles to my trade
Many a soldier shed his lifeblood on my blade
The bastards hung me in the spring of twenty-five
But I am still alive.

I was a sailor.
I was born upon the tide
And with the sea I did abide.
I sailed a schooner round the Horn to Mexico
I went aloft and furled the mainsail in a blow
And when the yards broke off they said that I got killed
But I am living still.

I was a dam builder.
Across the river deep and wide
Where steel and water did collide
A place called Boulder on the wild Colorado
I slipped and fell into the wet concrete below
They buried me in that great tob that knows no sound
But I am still around
I'll always be around
And around and around and around and around.

I fly a star ship.
Across the Universe divide
And when I reach the other side
I'll find a place to rest my spirit if I can
Perhaps I may become a highwayman again
Or I may simply be a single drop of rain
But I will remain
And I'll be back again, and again and again and again and again...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Dec 16 - 11:27 PM

It's been pruned, clipped, cleaned, polished, trimmed and improved in all directions. But we have agreed, and the buyer has dropped sixteen grand into her escrow account to show she is serious.

Tonight I called the Bekins man and told him to plan on loading and going on January tenth. Dear gawd, the world is beginning to tremble to its very roots. You homebodies can only imagine!

Tomorrow I fly to Oakland to pack up my one true offspring and load hiom up in a rental truck to bring him home. I think we're gonna need his help making this work!

Meanwhile, escrtow out East closes on January 5th. The money is steaming in its pot, ready to fling as conditions require, like boiling asphalt in a medieval catapult. Mwahahaha.

Heads up, Stilly! Coming your way. Rapp, I am afraid the extra loop north is a skip too far. Come to the Getaway instead!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 19 Dec 16 - 08:37 PM

How dare they offer a low-ball bid on the Jessup estate! That property has been vastly modified, even reinvented, on various mudcat threads. That property is semi-famous.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Dec 16 - 07:09 PM

No matter where Raps thoughts may roam
God bless the toad that's got its own
It's a rough road along the rocky coast
where dickering begins and ends the most.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 16 - 03:33 AM

I fly a starship across the Universe divide
And when I reach the other side
I'll find a place to rest my spirit if I can
Perhaps I may become a highwayman again
Or I may simply be a single drop of rain
But I will remain
And I'll be back again, and again and again and again and again.


And while I don't like correcting Amos, it's "coach roads" and not "coast toads." I dislike correcting myself even more and I acknowledge that I wrote "coat toads" instead of "coast toads."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 09:48 PM

I object for all highwaymen to being called a "coat toad." We have our standards and being toadies isn't one of them.

And now, Amos, the dickering starts. They want a Good Deal and you want Good Money. I hope that you and they can find common ground and that you are in North Carolina before the New Year takes root.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 09:35 PM

Keberoxu is right! "Coast toad" is an obvious typo! Everyone knows it should have been "toast code"!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 08:16 PM

Coast "toad" ?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 08:07 PM

I did not see any typos in Amos's post. I saw "230" instead of "2:30" and "I don't believes" instead of "I don't believe", but assumed they were intentional attempts to flout convention. It's sometimes difficult to tell the difference between convention flouting and simply being an eejit, so I tend to err in the direction of flouting unless the poster has a verifiable history of eejithood. Amos has a verifiable history of a number of things, but eejithood is not one of them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 03:53 PM

e May Be Small, But He Ain't No Two-Bit Hamster! -- (Northampton, England, Thursday 22nd August 2002) A schoolboy who took his hamster on a bus journey to visit his grandmother was charged a 10p fare for the pet. Jordan Underwood, 10, from King's Heath, Northampton, was stunned when after paying his own 55p fare, the bus driver demanded an extra 10p to allow Nibbles on board. Bus company First Northampton has reportedly launched an investigation into the incident. The animal was a gift from his 83-year-old grandmother to keep him company during the school holidays. Jordan said: "I got on the bus and the man was saying what a lovely hamster it was. He said (the fare) was 55p and then looked at Nibbles and told me it was another 10p for him. I don't think it was fair because you don't have to pay for dog or babies and their 10 times bigger. He didn't even use a seat because I put him on the floor and he was in a cage so he wasn't going to chew anything." Jordan added Nibbles was "shocked" by the ordeal and they would both continue to use the buses but hoped that they didn't meet the same driver again. His father, Todd, said: "There is a serious side to this, because he is only a little boy, and he might not have had enough money to get the bus back."


The Bus From Mewling Mews by Amos
(Tune: The Rising of the Moon)

Oh, then tell me Gertie Gerbil, now, have you heard the news?
We hamster are invited on the bus at Mewling Mews!
We may travel free of charge now, or so the papers say,
But your cell phone must be silent, and your Walkman must not play!

On the bus at Mewling Mews,
On the bus at Mewling Mews!
The hamsters are invited
On the bus at Mewling Mews!

Oh then tell me Hamster Horwich, what good is that to me?
I don't care if they charge me, and I don't care if it's free.
For my owner is a meathead, with apathetic views,
And he never will go traveling, on the bus from Mewling Mews!

On the bus from Mewling Mews,
On the bus from Mewling Mews!
He never will go traveling,
On the bus from Mewling Mews!

Though I yearn for high adventure and a trip on open roads,
He leaves me in a stinking cage, as though I were a toad!
He treats me like a lump of coal, I must explain to youse,
So I fear I cannot join you on the bus at Mewling Mews!

On the bus at Mewling Mews!
On the bus at Mewling Mews!
I fear I cannot join you
On the bus at Mewling Mews!

Oh, t'was fast approaching midnight, at Gertie's row-house pen,
When fat Edmund he was snoring, over telly in the den.
Then ten thousand tiny feet were heard, but not one pair of shoes,
And the hamsters kidnapped Gertie to the bus at Mewling Mews!

To the bus at Mewling Mews!
To the bus at Mewling Mews!
Five thousand angry hamsters
Board the bus at Mewling Mews!

Oh the motorman was very kind, for he'd been taught the rules
And his mum had never raised him for an independent fool,
So he let five thousands hamsters on, without a single fee
And he showed them all a merry time,
On the road to Killmashee!

On the bus from Mewling Mews!
On the bus from Mewling Mews!
Five thousand happy hamsters,
On the bus from Mewling Mews!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 03:50 PM

Find the typo! A golden cow chip to the first sharp-eyed matelot to blame me for the error correctly!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 03:48 PM

Crazy times--drove to LA for a family reunion, partied until late, got home at 230 in the morning. We got our first offer on the house this morning, and have countered it, it being a trifle lowballish. All tizzied up contemplating the many steps in casting off here, and making a new harbour. I don't believes snails, snakes and such critturs go through these heeby-jeebies when shifting housings, do they? Little birds do flitter and flutter a lot but they seem to know what to do without any wild-eyed planning sessions. Sometimes the burden of a human identity makes me want to take a lifetime off and just be a beluga or sea-bass or some such for a cycle to re-balance.

"I was a highwayman,
Along the coast toad I did ride,
Sword and pistol by my side..."



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Dec 16 - 04:52 AM

I fixed IE and all is fine, so far, with my PC. Being the tech savvy kinda guy I am, I just started using Chrome and ignored IE altogether until I clicked the wrong icon whilst half asleep a few minutes ago and... it worked!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 16 - 05:02 PM

Is that from Sun Valley, Idaho? On accounta it sounds like you are blowin' sunshine up someone's ass. Not mine but someone's.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 16 - 04:16 PM

I'm sure you all have heard of "King Cod". That was yet another attempt and it was quite successful in some places for several months. It used parts of the cod, smoked them, and then ground and bagged them for tea.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Dec 16 - 02:48 PM

I love Lapsang Souchong! Smells like a smokehouse full of smoked mullet.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 17 Dec 16 - 10:44 AM

I always wondered about Lapsang Souchong tea - in my household (where we had some, sent by my father) as "roofing tar tea."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Dec 16 - 10:21 PM

No wonder they went out of business. Ground corn shucks, horsehair, and various mosses and seaweeds are the principle ingredients in SPAM, not tea. Somebody got their recipes mixed up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 16 - 09:01 PM

That was another abortive attempt at a new product, the tea being made from the used stuffings of New Brunswick mattresses back in the early 1920s. March 3, 1921, 3:34 p.m. was the initial announcement, the product was taken off the market at 6:23 a.m. the next day. It was decided that there was no market for a tea made from ground corn shucks, horsehair, and various mosses and seaweeds. Even though the company pointed out that the teabags were made from bed linens that had been washed, the Department of Health in Fredericton said no.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 16 Dec 16 - 08:28 PM

this brings to mind King Koil mattresses


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 16 - 06:23 PM

That's the reintroduction price of King Kohl. Check the label and/or ingredients.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 16 Dec 16 - 04:13 PM

I bought 6X240 King Cole Tea. BB date is May 23, 2018. I might even start drinking tea again when the pot gets legalized here in The Great White Frozen as Justin promised he would make happen. One packet of King Cole to one pinch of a low TCH and high CBD content ganja and Bob's yer arhtritis eh? Disclaimer : I disagree with the proposed new "pot system"... not enough control for recreational/medical pot as proposed. But, BIG $$$ can't be stopped from fucking up good things... the bastards!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Dec 16 - 10:05 AM

It's coming back! Word from Sussex, New Brunswick is that G. E. Barbour has purchased the Kohl's department store chain solely to market a revived "King Kohl" tea. This tea will be approved for vegans and will contain NOTHING that "rips off Mother Earth or causes harm to anything in any way." The initial advertising will be along the lines of "We sell you nothing for a huge amount of money" but phrased differently.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Dec 16 - 01:35 PM

...a regular supply wasn't reestablished until the late 1950s. By then "King Kohl" tea had changed its name and formulation.

Yes, and it was exceptionally bad timing on the part of the "King Kohl" folks, seeing as how the late '50s was also the era of Sputnik, whose resemblance to kohlrabi sparked a huge increase in the vegetable's popularity. People were going to farmers' markets and asking farmers if they had any of "them Sputnik lookin' thangs."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Dec 16 - 10:01 AM

I see. I was thinking of a tea marketed when I lived in Kentucky.

Wasn't it originally made only from kohlrabi and hence was called "King Kohl"? I believe the rationing of kohlrabi led to the inclusion of the other "greens." That would have been during the Mahdist War, when Great Britain was critically short of kohlrabi and called upon their colonies to supply men, materiel, and kohlrabi. Canada patriotically responded with "Kohlrabi For The King" and sent so much that the nation bankrupted its kohlrabi supply for years to come -- a regular supply wasn't reestablished until the late 1950s. By then "King Kohl" tea had changed its name and formulation.

A variant, "King Coll", was marketed for a brief period. It contained only collard greens and while it was popular in some places in the Southern US it was a flop in Canada and was, like "New Coke," taken off the market.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Dec 16 - 06:12 AM

No, it's "Cole", as in "coleslaw". It's another word for cabbage. King Cole tea is made of a blend of leaves, stems, and flowers from various members of the cabbage (brassica) family. Plants which may be found in a batch of King Cole tea include kale, cabbage, collard greens, broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, kohlrabi, canola, turnip, and rutabaga.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Dec 16 - 08:54 PM

I believe you misspelled "Coal" as "Cole." It's "King Coal Tea," the "Tea Made With Real Anthracite."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 14 Dec 16 - 12:53 PM

HOLD THE PHONE!!! SHE'S OFF THE WIRE!!!

Starting tomorrow, The Real Atlantic Stupidstore* has 240 count boxes of King Cole Tea on sale for $4.99. I shall be there before daylight with a crisp $20 bill!

I shit you not.

* It WOULD be the "Superstore" if at least half of the employees knew something, anything, about half of the products but they don't. Don't get me wrong. It's a great place for groceries... on sale. And, at least twice a month, I buy something, go through the checkout, go to Customer Service, and get it for free because the checkout price was not as advertised in the weekly flier or as displayed on the shelf. Hey, if they wanna try to rip off customers at the checkout, two can play that game... I just pay without saying "That's not the correct price." Their "minced pies" are delicious and they were free on Sunday. >;-)


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