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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 26 Dec 07 - 10:56 AM
GUEST,Rapaire 26 Dec 07 - 11:15 AM
Amos 26 Dec 07 - 11:46 AM
MMario 26 Dec 07 - 12:06 PM
Amos 26 Dec 07 - 12:30 PM
MMario 26 Dec 07 - 12:49 PM
Amos 26 Dec 07 - 12:57 PM
Acme 26 Dec 07 - 01:03 PM
Amos 26 Dec 07 - 01:19 PM
Acme 26 Dec 07 - 02:16 PM
Amos 26 Dec 07 - 08:30 PM
Janie 26 Dec 07 - 09:20 PM
Amos 26 Dec 07 - 10:02 PM
Acme 27 Dec 07 - 01:57 AM
MMario 27 Dec 07 - 08:43 AM
Amos 27 Dec 07 - 10:52 AM
Acme 27 Dec 07 - 11:44 AM
Amos 27 Dec 07 - 03:36 PM
Acme 27 Dec 07 - 08:30 PM
Rapparee 27 Dec 07 - 09:11 PM
Acme 28 Dec 07 - 02:39 AM
MMario 28 Dec 07 - 09:02 AM
GUEST,Amos Away 28 Dec 07 - 09:23 AM
Rapparee 28 Dec 07 - 09:30 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 28 Dec 07 - 01:51 PM
Acme 28 Dec 07 - 02:27 PM
MMario 28 Dec 07 - 03:00 PM
Rapparee 28 Dec 07 - 03:48 PM
Janie 28 Dec 07 - 11:06 PM
Acme 29 Dec 07 - 11:55 AM
Janie 29 Dec 07 - 12:14 PM
Acme 29 Dec 07 - 09:10 PM
Rapparee 29 Dec 07 - 09:31 PM
Janie 29 Dec 07 - 10:16 PM
Rapparee 29 Dec 07 - 10:30 PM
Janie 29 Dec 07 - 11:33 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 07 - 12:17 AM
Janie 30 Dec 07 - 12:35 AM
Acme 30 Dec 07 - 01:32 AM
Rapparee 30 Dec 07 - 09:30 AM
Acme 30 Dec 07 - 11:01 AM
Rapparee 30 Dec 07 - 03:16 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 07 - 03:22 PM
Amos 30 Dec 07 - 10:07 PM
Rapparee 30 Dec 07 - 10:20 PM
Janie 30 Dec 07 - 10:34 PM
Amos 30 Dec 07 - 11:23 PM
Acme 31 Dec 07 - 12:50 AM
Amos 31 Dec 07 - 09:16 AM
Rapparee 31 Dec 07 - 09:33 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 10:56 AM

I realy get tired of this little game of Rapaire's of implying he is supporting Mom when others are not.

In order to clarify the facts of the matter, I have resorted to Excel, which provides the following counts of the last fifty posts:

        Name        Date
        Amos         21 Dec 07 - 03:57 PM
        Amos         21 Dec 07 - 04:10 PM
        Amos         21 Dec 07 - 11:36 PM
        Amos         21 Dec 07 - 12:20 PM
        Amos         22 Dec 07 - 01:37 PM
        Amos         22 Dec 07 - 05:01 PM
        Amos         22 Dec 07 - 05:49 PM
        Amos         22 Dec 07 - 09:44 AM
        Amos         22 Dec 07 - 11:45 AM
        Amos         23 Dec 07 - 01:03 PM
        Amos         23 Dec 07 - 01:44 AM
        Amos         23 Dec 07 - 02:08 PM
        Amos         23 Dec 07 - 09:09 PM
        Amos         23 Dec 07 - 09:56 PM
        Amos         23 Dec 07 - 11:35 AM
        Amos         23 Dec 07 - 11:38 PM
        Amos         24 Dec 07 - 01:32 PM
        Amos         24 Dec 07 - 01:34 PM
        Amos         24 Dec 07 - 04:21 PM
        Amos         24 Dec 07 - 05:38 PM
        Amos         24 Dec 07 - 09:42 AM
        Amos         25 Dec 07 - 01:29 PM
        Amos         25 Dec 07 - 02:17 PM
        Amos         25 Dec 07 - 06:19 PM
        Amos         25 Dec 07 - 10:22 AM
Amos Count        25        
        GUEST,freds         24 Dec 07 - 10:57 PM
GUEST,freds Count        1        
        GUEST,Janie         21 Dec 07 - 12:16 PM
GUEST,Janie Count        1        
        GUEST,Rapaire         23 Dec 07 - 09:15 PM
        GUEST,Rapaire         26 Dec 07 - 08:46 AM
GUEST,Rapaire Count        2        
        Janie         21 Dec 07 - 06:53 PM
        Janie         21 Dec 07 - 11:20 PM
Janie Count        2        
        MMario         21 Dec 07 - 12:22 PM
        MMario         21 Dec 07 - 12:26 PM
        MMario         26 Dec 07 - 09:40 AM
MMario Count        3        
        Rapaire         22 Dec 07 - 01:05 PM
        Rapaire         23 Dec 07 - 04:35 PM
        Rapaire         23 Dec 07 - 12:13 PM
        Rapaire         24 Dec 07 - 10:42 AM
        Rapaire         25 Dec 07 - 01:20 PM
Rapaire Count        5        
        Stilly River Sage         21 Dec 07 - 10:19 PM
        Stilly River Sage         21 Dec 07 - 10:24 PM
        Stilly River Sage         22 Dec 07 - 03:25 AM
        Stilly River Sage         23 Dec 07 - 01:44 PM
        Stilly River Sage         23 Dec 07 - 01:55 AM
        Stilly River Sage         23 Dec 07 - 10:23 PM
        Stilly River Sage         23 Dec 07 - 12:28 PM
        Stilly River Sage         24 Dec 07 - 01:15 PM
        Stilly River Sage         24 Dec 07 - 03:04 AM
        Stilly River Sage         24 Dec 07 - 09:14 PM
        Stilly River Sage         25 Dec 07 - 04:15 PM
Stilly River Sage Count        11        
Grand Count        50

So there ya go, Mom. Just in case he makes any big claims, ya know...
Not that he would try to exagerrate or anything.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 11:15 AM

Lies, damned lies, and Excel spreadsheets. And THIS from a guy who uses a Mac! For shame!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 11:46 AM

SHame, indeed, sir, shame, indeed!


HEeeeearrrrr that whistle bloooow......



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 12:06 PM

hey amos? since we can't post at *EXACTLY* the same time - Rapaire *is* supporting Mom when the others of us are not - because two of us can't do it at the same time. And if someone else isn't, and he is.....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 12:30 PM

YEs, of course you are right.

But that is not the sense of the word "when" I was using, you see.

He faults others for neglectiong Our Mom in the most scurrilous and baseless accusations. The man simply has no shame.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 12:49 PM

I have to admit you have a point there.

On the other hand - I prefer to think of it as the rest of us being morally superior and humble to a fault.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 12:57 PM

Yes, good Mario, I concur and yield to your superior insight in the matter.

Now I must turn my talents tot he delicate matter of patent law and the disclosure of new improved technology in antenna bobbins and signal mixing. This may be important. Or not. Whatever...

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 01:03 PM

Count or no-account, I've been busy. I'm cleaning out my sun room (some refer to it as a mud room, but I really would like it to be a craft room and a place for a morning cup of tea and reading the newspaper). And I made some turkey soup this morning, to reheat and add some homemade noodles (I got a pasta machine for xmas! YESSS!) when my friend Bette (she of the elbow in my dinner rolls last Saturday) comes over tonight. We'll have dinner and watch a video. MOM should join us.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 01:19 PM

After what she did to your dinner rolls, you're having her back?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 02:16 PM

Everyone survived, including the rolls.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 08:30 PM

Thank you, Stilly, from the bottom of my heart.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 09:20 PM

Hi Mom. I'm home.

Looks like all the sibs have had a good holiday.

Gotta go. Listening to the third book of "His Dark Materials."

Some odd yarny, woolly looking stuff popped up out of the wormhole in the back yard. while I was gone.

Hmmm.......


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 10:02 PM

Y a y y y y y for Janie!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 01:57 AM

Severn has gone a little nutso over the puns in the Mudcat tavern the last couple of days. I notice few of MOM's other children have been in. MMario must be out back cooking, he barely stuck his head in.

I've been cleaning house.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 08:43 AM

hey! I made an enteire jello pit of poached Nile Crocodile! What more do you want?

Sorry - bit grouchy and on edge -

we have one cat at the vet's with renal failure - not expected to live the day

The second (his brother) has pnuemonia but went out early this am and hasn't returned (about 3 hours when I left for work); thus overdue for medication and awol. Plus - it's probably been 2 months since he's stayed out longer then 20 minutes or so.

and the third hasn't been seen since yesterday morning at about 11 am. He's also sneezing and getting sick.

Meanwhile - I'm worried (hey - you don't live with a pet for 18 years without worrying when they get sick) ; but my b-i-l is *really* upset. and that bothers me because *his* health ain't the greatest. Sister in Japan with niece.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 10:52 AM

Aw, sheeshe. May they all return safe and sound.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 11:44 AM

Put on your overcoat and a warm hat and gloves and take some kind of strong warm bag and go poke around those dark spaces where a cat might crawl and die by itself. Better if they're in the house with people, perhaps. I have an elderly cat myself, who's coming up on the age of my last very old cat who died of liver failure. He's healthy, but my kids have known this cat almost all their lives, so when he goes, it will be something that hits everyone hard. Good wishes to your b-i-l and others in the household who cherish kitties.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 03:36 PM

Twenty-one-two-seven-two,
Bring dem kitties back to you!


Mom, I am AWAY!!

Make the boyos behave and the girls stay chaste until I return. AFter that, all bets are off.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 08:30 PM

Grrrr. . . I'm in a fowl mood.

I can't believe the number of trips and calls I've had to make in order to get this video card for my son's computer. We shopped and decided last week (two trips for that decision), and we ordered online to save some money. The company sent it out super fast (we paid for overnight, ordered on Friday and it was in the next town over on Saturday morning according to the tracking info. And still there until Monday morning, when it vanished from their facility.) A claim has been filed and we said "fuck it" and went and bought part of the gift at the store. The sale part is ordered online. Geez, Louise. Never use DHL as your shipper if you want to get what you ordered. I have never voluntarily used them, but every time it has been necessary, they have NEVER gotten the goods to me when they said. Or intact. Ever. How do they stay in business?

Okay, back to your turkey leftovers. I'm done grousing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 09:11 PM

Good evening, everyone. I have returned to my little old sod shanty in Pacific Northwest, surrounded by acres of claims. And the snow lays as a quilt upon mountains, a whitework piece that only Nature (or Mom) can create.

I am so very glad to be back, and to see that Amos and MMario and Stilly and Janie and everyone has been taking such good care of Mom. I did my best, but that George and Laura! fight fight fight all the time. If it's not over Condi it's over the girls' desire to help their friend Paris with her project about drunken Indian elephants and George saying in all seriousness "I didn't KNOW the Apaches had got into Eli's pants" and, well, the chaos was unbelievable.

Phooey on them, I say. Fie upon them. It's a dysfunctional family and I can't do a thing to help them if they don't cooperate.

I got enough trouble with the Legion.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 02:39 AM

Kick back and enjoy view of the golf course. If it snows enough will you go build snowmen out there? Place them conspicuously over the hole in the middle of the green, or very close by. Build anatomically correct snowmen and let them appear to pee into the holes. Think of all of the possibilities!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 09:02 AM

eeeee-yeuuuuuuh! Must we?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Amos Away
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 09:23 AM

What a wonderland of opportunity. Those little flags sticking through their bleeding backsides. Fingers stuck in holes. Snowmen enjoying ball-washing machines. Wow...
A really fine opportunity for Rapaire to demonstrate his deep creative side.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 09:30 AM

Rapaire is already thinking of anatomically correct snowMEN positioned over holes, with anatomically correct snowWOMEN placing the flag in...well, nevermind.

Oh, oh! I just thought of something!

I'll freeze some yellow colored water in a narrow arc, walk over to the third green (approaching it from a different direction than directly from my house!) and place the frozen arc appropriately over the hole. I think I'll take some unfrozen yellow water with me and sprinkle it around a bit. Footprints to the arc, footprints away from it...boy, was it cold out!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 01:51 PM

Hi Mom! You know everything, so I'll ask you....

The call letters of US radio and TV stations begin with a "K" if the station is west of the Mississippi River, or with a "W" if it's to the east, right? So, do wou think there's a station somewhere with the call letters "WTF"?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 02:27 PM

Howdy, stranger!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 03:00 PM

currently in use:

WTFH
WTFM
WTFX

nor plain ordinary WTF


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 03:48 PM

However...KDKA is based outa Pittsburgh, PA.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:06 PM

The Great MOM, calls all her chitlins home every now and again. WTF, you say?

Sez I, WTF.

Amen.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 11:55 AM

chitlins, Janie?

Chilin's or Chil'en or something like that. But "chitlins," isn't that fried intestines (minus a few letters that aren't pronounced?)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 12:14 PM

Stilly - Intentional misusage common in my region - local humor. Apparently more local than I realized.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 09:10 PM

Well, darn. Trying to order alder chips online. The ACE hardware folks gouge on their shipping charges. I compared prices and though I had two screens open the damned thing changed even though I sent through the form with the correct number. Arrggggh. How can I smoke my salmon (soon) without good alder chips? I cancelled (I hope) the order and will place it again later. It costs me 80 cents more for shipping to buy three bags of chips as it does to buy one bag of chips. MOM would be steamed about this if she'd placed the order. Just as well she didn't--she's hard on monitors when she's pissed off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 09:31 PM

Well, up at the Legion hovel they smoke their salmon by rolling it up in Zig-Zag papers and lighting it with a match.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 10:16 PM

Well, I have spent another day doing absolutely nothing of consequence - turning into a pattern. Perhaps if I smoked some of that salmon it might fire my imagination if nothing else? Maybe I'll ask MOM if she and I might spend New Year's Eve at the Legion Hall.

In the meantime, this Spanish Red will have to do.

Knowing those Legionaires as you do, brother Rap, would you recommend we carry small silver daggers in our garters?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 10:30 PM

I'd suggest to wear a poison-tipped chastity belt.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 29 Dec 07 - 11:33 PM

In that case, maybe we'll stay home and watch old movies.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 12:17 AM

Well, you asked....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 12:35 AM

So send MOM and me some of that salmon for smoking, please.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 01:32 AM

One thing at a time! I finished taking down all of the holiday lights and ornaments (I didn't put up as many this year, and didn't do a tree. It was too much work on top of a new roof and a paint job.) Tomorrow I'll take a bunch of donation stuff over to the Goodwill (I suspect they have a glut of donations this year, so I shall go early). And once payday happens, THEN I'll go see about the salmon. They're not cheap (I will buy a whole frozen fish, defrost and fillet it, then brine it, let it cure, then smoke it. It takes a couple of days at the very least). No papers required for smoking this fine fish! Monsieur Le Zig Zag is NOT welcome!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 09:30 AM

Hey, them Legionairres and Legionettes grow their own salmon. That is, "salmon" is what they call it because they grow it in obscure places along the Salmon River. It's some kind of plant that was originally used by, I think, cannibals because it's real name is something like "cannibals satisfied." Anyway, they harvest it, dry it, run it through a blender, and enjoy smoked salmon. They say it's good for glaucoma and I guess a lot of them have glaucoma. I think it smells like burning Coca-Cola.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 11:01 AM

Hmmm. You've burned Coca Cola, have you?

Sunny and bright today, Mom! Let's get out and rake some leaves! They won't smell like burning Coke (or Diet Coke) but the lawn will look better.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 03:16 PM

Spilled it on a hot woodstove. I've also peed on a hot sheet-iron stove, and I can assure you that one smells nothing at all like the other.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 03:22 PM

This post 21,297. As of this post we have only 503 more posts before we can again enjoy a center number that is a true spinner? And only 59,511 from the next true spinner number?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 10:07 PM

Hey, Mom!! I just drove all the way down to San Diego from Paso Robles, the most beautiful drive down the coast. The land along the California coast can be breathtaking, especially north of Santa Barbara, Anyway., we had a really nice visit with Mudlark up Paso way and are now safely home, showered and rested and thinking about semantics.

Glad to be home despite these really weird numbers Rapaire is mumbling on about.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 10:20 PM

I dunno, Amos. There is a Power in numbers, a Power to foretell things. Like take the number 042 and the number 1945. Together they become the Julian date of my birthday, the single most important day in the entire history of the Universe: the 42nd day of the 1,945th year of the current era.

This was predicted, of course, by prophets and other folks who predict things. Like my mother and her obstetrician. Isaiah. Jeremiah. Nostredamus. Moses. The Buddha. Job. Joanna Southcott. Nimrod Hughes. Jemima Wilkinson. Frederick Barbarossa. Getafix. The Delphic Oracle. And lots and lots and lots of others all around the world.

Each and every one of them would mutter "The Forty-second of the one thousand, nine hundred, and forty-fifth. HE will come then."

And I did.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 10:34 PM

Which makes me kinda scared to post two-one-three-oh-oh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 11:23 PM

Bravely done. Never mind Rapaire -- as you can see from his recent posts he flirts with solecism and thinks he is ALL that....



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Dec 07 - 12:50 AM

I drove in the dark from I-5 to Atascadero--interesting in the moonlight one summer night, and I think I passed huge sand dunes. It was different from Atascadero out to the ocean, but pretty. Morro Bay, that's up there, right? I have some great photos of the kids playing in the water.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Dec 07 - 09:16 AM

Right. The run from I-5 on across to Paso Robles/Atascadero is weird in the dark -- but those are hills, not dunes. Morro Bay is breathtaking.

I yearn for a dirigible.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Dec 07 - 09:33 AM

On my desk are two 10" slide rules, both Accu-Math 500s. On the case of one is written (by me) various formulae and equations, such as

(a+b)^n=a^n + na^n-1b/1 + n(n-1)a^n-2b^2/1*2*3...+...b^n

and

how to determine the sin, cos, tan, csc, sec, and ctn of a right triangle.

I wasn't allowed my slide rule case when I took tests and quizzes in physics and maths, but I was allowed my slide rule.

It's been 44 years since I used them to any great extent, but their batteries are still good!


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