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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

GUEST 16 Mar 05 - 08:40 AM
Rapparee 16 Mar 05 - 09:31 AM
Bunnahabhain 16 Mar 05 - 11:26 AM
Acme 16 Mar 05 - 11:26 AM
GUEST,Bozo the wilmas 16 Mar 05 - 12:26 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Mar 05 - 12:43 PM
Acme 16 Mar 05 - 12:49 PM
GUEST,MMario 16 Mar 05 - 12:56 PM
Rustic Rebel 16 Mar 05 - 01:07 PM
Rustic Rebel 16 Mar 05 - 01:16 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Mar 05 - 01:36 PM
Layah 16 Mar 05 - 02:47 PM
GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell 16 Mar 05 - 03:08 PM
Rapparee 16 Mar 05 - 03:20 PM
GUEST,Chuckles 16 Mar 05 - 03:36 PM
GUEST,MMario 16 Mar 05 - 03:49 PM
Rustic Rebel 16 Mar 05 - 04:15 PM
Layah 16 Mar 05 - 04:57 PM
GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell 16 Mar 05 - 05:03 PM
Layah 16 Mar 05 - 05:59 PM
Rapparee 16 Mar 05 - 06:14 PM
Amos 16 Mar 05 - 07:10 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Mar 05 - 08:38 PM
Rapparee 16 Mar 05 - 10:25 PM
Acme 16 Mar 05 - 10:51 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Mar 05 - 12:06 AM
Bunnahabhain 17 Mar 05 - 07:56 AM
Rapparee 17 Mar 05 - 09:09 AM
Rapparee 17 Mar 05 - 11:41 AM
Rustic Rebel 17 Mar 05 - 12:38 PM
Amos 17 Mar 05 - 01:23 PM
GUEST,MMario 17 Mar 05 - 01:30 PM
GUEST 17 Mar 05 - 01:35 PM
GUEST,MMario 17 Mar 05 - 01:37 PM
GUEST,MMario 17 Mar 05 - 02:37 PM
Rapparee 17 Mar 05 - 04:23 PM
Bunnahabhain 18 Mar 05 - 07:52 AM
Rapparee 18 Mar 05 - 08:29 AM
GUEST 18 Mar 05 - 12:33 PM
GUEST,Bunnhabhain. 18 Mar 05 - 12:39 PM
GUEST,Bunnahabhain 18 Mar 05 - 12:47 PM
GUEST,MMario 18 Mar 05 - 12:50 PM
GUEST,Rapaire 18 Mar 05 - 01:06 PM
GUEST,MMario 18 Mar 05 - 01:50 PM
Bunnahabhain 18 Mar 05 - 01:53 PM
GUEST,MMario 18 Mar 05 - 01:58 PM
GUEST,MMario 18 Mar 05 - 01:59 PM
Rapparee 18 Mar 05 - 03:04 PM
GUEST 18 Mar 05 - 03:11 PM
Rapparee 18 Mar 05 - 03:13 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 08:40 AM

freds is coming! freds is coming! one if by air, two if by sea! Three with komodo dragons!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 09:31 AM

My niece the biologist-in-training-for-her-PhD tells me that freds "almost certainly" look like this during something called 'telophase' and later, after pupation, they probably look like this, "especially after losing a game of chess." Anything else they look like, she says, is because of mind-melding.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 11:26 AM

Are you totally sure that those are freds? They look like humphries to me?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 11:26 AM

Freds and friends. In hisherits visit to Antarctica.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bozo the wilmas
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 12:26 PM

I have been contacted by Chuckles the freds and he assures me that the labrador retrievers are sniffing around Florida as we speak.

Chuckles has contacted all wilmas in the planetary system to help seek and tickle Bee-Dubya-ell to a near laughter experience.

After this happens we wilmas will take no further steps to aid and abet our freds alliance.

Logon berry and quince to you, Bozo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 12:43 PM

Aw, hell! It's worse than I thought! Freds have infiltrated the music stores! And they're manifesting themselves in the form of somtheing that looks nothing at all like a fungus! AARRGGHH!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 12:49 PM

You are in deep now, BWL, that's all I can say! (But don't let the wife find out. . .)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 12:56 PM

In other news - it appears biologists of the Idaho Legion have discovered a new species of Fairy Shrimp . A pretty big one - they say it grows to three inches (7.6 cm)

How come we didn't hear this from you, Rapaire?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 01:07 PM

Bee-dubya, if freds look like that your wife could be one.
What have you done Bee-dubya? I think you should be a bit wary after I found this page.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 01:16 PM

Upon further investigating I found this. Could it be freds and wilmas plotting a takeover?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 01:36 PM

By golly, you're right, Susie! My wife may be freds! She may even be Chuckles! I've only known the "woman" for eighteen years. Who knows what form hesheit might have manifested in earlier days? So hesheit claims to have been "married" before and there are the two "children" from the "previous marriage". How do I know they're not produced by mind-melding, as Rapaire's niece contends? Then there's the "ex-husband", "Willie". Yes, "Willie" definitely could be freds.

I'm getting quite frightened here. First Chuckles, then Bozo, then wilmas, and now my wife, "Susan". Hah! Listen to this: During the period between my divorce from my first wife and marriage to "Susan" I dated three "women" named "Susan" in a row! Coincidence? I think not! It's becoming extremely apparent that freds have been seeking me out for twenty years now! Oh! What shall I do?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Layah
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 02:47 PM

Sounds to me like freds has already caught you, Bee-Dubya. It's much too late to do anything about it now that you've married one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 03:08 PM

Wait a minute! If my "wife", "Susan", who is sometimes referred to as "Susie" by members of her "family", is freds, then that makes it highly likely that "Rustic Rebel", who is also known as "Susie", is freds as well! Next thing you know, I'll be finding that Tweed is freds too! Well, that wouldn't surprise me very much. Tweed's never exactly seemed 100% human anyway.

You're right, Layah. I might as well give up and go with the flow. If anyone needs me, I'll be off shopping here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 03:20 PM

We've been breedin' them shrimps as part of our Plot To Take Over. We figgered that iffen we could git 'em big enough...well, ya know that they's "fairy shrimp." So we figgered that having giant jumbo fairy shrimp would be oxymoronic enuff ta snuff the minds of the current administration in deecee. This was thought up by "Hacky" Moore, who figgered thet when the deecee spondits started thinkin' about giant fairy shrimps they'd git all worried about giant fairies and giant shrimp and their li'l minds would turn off like a blown bulb.

But the Idyho National Guard got wind of it aforen it was ready, and so our nefarious Plot To Take Over is foiled agin.

Prolly jist as well, too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chuckles
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 03:36 PM

Hello. I have located the Bee-Dubya-Ell, but it is moving around. Why doesn't it stay in one place? It is very difficult to masticate a moving foodsource even for freds. If you can, please tell it to SIT THE GODDAMN HELL DOWN AND STAY PUT!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 03:49 PM

Chuckles is right, Bee-dubya. If you are gonna mess with freds the least you could do is stay still and be good food.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 04:15 PM

I take it back Mrs. Bee. Your not a fred are you? Hell no! I cannot be a fred. I do not want to eat anyone who plays in swamps, sucks on lily pad fronds and makes cups from mud. But...If a person can read this it may shed some light on the entire existance of freds.

Or not!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Layah
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 04:57 PM

I can't read that, it's in English! The little Russian bit in the corner I can read, but I don't see how you expect me to understand all that English stuff. Does it look like I speak English?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 05:03 PM

I'm over my brief attack of fatalism. You freds wanna piece of me, just come on! But I'm warnin' ya, I've got a secret weapon! And it really works well for sauteing sautaying frying mushrooms!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Layah
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 05:59 PM

Now I understand why there was all that spatula craziness a while back. We were all preparing for the attack of freds! I'm sure glad we knew what we were doing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 06:14 PM

Welcome, Layah, to MOAB, where the future is past, the past is present, the present is future, and any other variation of that you can think of, including the concepts of near-past, far-future, and middle-present, except of course at speeds approaching or exceeding c, at which a whole new set of parameters takes over.

And I just thought that we always speak of approaching or exceeding the speed of light. What happens if we approach or exceed the speed of dark? Has the speed of dark been determined, and if so, what is it? If "d" = the speed of dark, does E=md^2 work? Does the speed of dark mean that all that energy is not expended by the conversion of mass, but is rather sucked up into the mass? Does the mass expand, or does it stay the same physical size but become massier? If the sucked-up energy produces less mass than the mass into which it is sucked, could that be considered as half-massed? There's a Nobel Prize in this, or at least something. Maybe something plastic and breakable.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 07:10 PM

It's a cute hypothesis, born under the sign of the MOAB, and it has its mother's lips.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 08:38 PM

Here on the MOAB the speed of dark is actually quite a bit faster than the speed of light. You see, that c of which scientists speak is actually the speed of light in a vacuum. Light doesn't travel at the same speed through, say, water as it does through outer space. And BS is one of the more difficult things for light to penetrate. In fact, BS of MOABic density slows light to a mere 34 MPH. Dark, on the other hand, penetrates BS with no difficulty at all. Dark moves through BS at 123,456,789 MPH which, though somewhat slower than light through a vacuum, is fast enough to get it a multimillion dollar traffic citation if the cops ever get cars fast enough to catch it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 10:25 PM

BW, I wonder if that's what's slowing down Chuckles?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 16 Mar 05 - 10:51 PM

Chuckles is running a little slow now. I think something ran him underground. But if he's going underground, then he must be trying to acclimate to the speed of dark. . . whoa. . . look out BWL. . . that lump in the path might be more than a fire ant mound!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 12:06 AM

Chuckles is a candy-ass! CLICK!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 07:56 AM

If you accelerate an object to above the local speed of light, it emits Cerkanov radiation.

Now what happens if we accelerate a nugget of BS to above the local speed of dark?

Bunnhabhain.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 09:09 AM

Vonakrec radiation?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 11:41 AM

Sorry, that should have been "Vonakrec noitaidar."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 12:38 PM

We at the MOAB have become so famous they have named a town in Utah after us and it looks like we're holding a MOAB Festival!! How exiting is that?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 01:23 PM

Exiting beyond belief!! In the best MOAB fashion the main attraction is hidden down a river and only available by boat.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 01:30 PM

qWhat do you get if you cross a Palimino with a dromedary?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 01:35 PM

A PalindromE!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 01:37 PM

now I hope the definition of palindrome is what I think it is. If not. never mind


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 02:37 PM

of course if you cross a pushme-pullyu with a camel you get a palindromedary!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Mar 05 - 04:23 PM

You fly airplanes from an aerodrome, so you must fly palins from a palindrome.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 07:52 AM

No, you get Palins from Pythons, and then he spends the last 20 years wandering round pretty bits of the world for the BBC, saying "Isn't it exotic?"

dromophobia- a fear of crossing streets...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 08:29 AM

I've been to Scotland, and found it very exotic.

England, too. And Canada. And Ireland. And France. And Korea. And Idaho. And Wyoming. And especially Dallas.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 12:33 PM

Exotic-
A place where you are offered strange new food/drink.......(we dont want to know what you though there), and wish you could/couldn't work out what it is, what the locals are saying, and if they want dollars, some funny coloured local currency, or to marry your daughter.

Taking that as a base,
I've been to Scotland, and England. And Canada. And Ireland. And France. And Korea. And Idaho. And Wyoming. And especially Dallas.

makes all of those fairly exotic. Yes, we can guess the French are after you daughters, and Dallas is after your dollars, but not much more...

Batrachophobia- Fear of amphibians

Bunnhabhain.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bunnhabhain.
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 12:39 PM

Sorry, Guest below was me.

Venustraphobia- Fear of beautiful women.

Bunnahabhain


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bunnahabhain
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 12:47 PM

I just spotted I'd signed my original post, so the correction one was just confusing. I know Crystal isn't online to say it, so I will. I'm being a numpty today.

BTW, this isn't a Flamenco Ted style string of posts to bag a number, or me talking to myself. I hope

Phronemophobia- Fear of thinking.

Bunnhabahain.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 12:50 PM

I *drove* in Dallas! and survived.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Rapaire
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 01:06 PM

I went to the Cotton Bowl (Notre Dame vs. Texas A&M) in Dallas and survived, albeit brain-shocked.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 01:50 PM

TGIG tgif TGIF


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 01:53 PM

WTF!?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 01:58 PM

Thank God it's Friday!


and WTF?!

I prefer WOBH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 01:59 PM

or is you just confuzzled?

Most people reading MOAB are...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 03:04 PM

Okay, Mom. I'll do it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 03:11 PM

hahaha! Rapaire took the hundred!


neener-neener!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Mar 05 - 03:13 PM

Someone had to do so, and I, in my graciousness, did so. Dibs on 6969 and 6996!


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