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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 21 Jun 11 - 06:54 PM
Amos 21 Jun 11 - 10:28 PM
Rapparee 22 Jun 11 - 12:00 AM
Amos 22 Jun 11 - 09:54 AM
Rapparee 22 Jun 11 - 10:01 AM
Acme 22 Jun 11 - 10:53 AM
Rapparee 22 Jun 11 - 02:11 PM
Little Hawk 22 Jun 11 - 04:34 PM
gnu 22 Jun 11 - 05:25 PM
Rapparee 22 Jun 11 - 05:43 PM
Little Hawk 22 Jun 11 - 08:49 PM
Rapparee 22 Jun 11 - 10:43 PM
Amos 22 Jun 11 - 11:12 PM
Acme 22 Jun 11 - 11:25 PM
Acme 23 Jun 11 - 09:31 AM
Rapparee 23 Jun 11 - 11:24 AM
Amos 23 Jun 11 - 12:02 PM
Rapparee 23 Jun 11 - 05:14 PM
Amos 23 Jun 11 - 05:31 PM
Rapparee 23 Jun 11 - 07:59 PM
Eiseley 23 Jun 11 - 08:26 PM
Rapparee 23 Jun 11 - 11:05 PM
Acme 23 Jun 11 - 11:22 PM
Amos 24 Jun 11 - 08:30 AM
Rapparee 24 Jun 11 - 10:20 AM
Little Hawk 24 Jun 11 - 10:24 AM
Amos 24 Jun 11 - 10:36 AM
Acme 24 Jun 11 - 12:33 PM
GUEST,Hokh-Ptui 24 Jun 11 - 01:01 PM
GUEST,Albert Einstein 24 Jun 11 - 02:16 PM
gnu 24 Jun 11 - 04:50 PM
Rapparee 24 Jun 11 - 05:15 PM
Eiseley 24 Jun 11 - 05:49 PM
Little Hawk 24 Jun 11 - 10:09 PM
Rapparee 24 Jun 11 - 11:05 PM
Amos 25 Jun 11 - 01:23 AM
GUEST,Bhork'm-Rif 25 Jun 11 - 12:12 PM
Acme 25 Jun 11 - 12:44 PM
Amos 25 Jun 11 - 12:56 PM
gnu 25 Jun 11 - 03:45 PM
Little Hawk 25 Jun 11 - 07:47 PM
Rapparee 25 Jun 11 - 10:34 PM
Rapparee 25 Jun 11 - 10:35 PM
GUEST,The Intergalactic Overlord 25 Jun 11 - 10:56 PM
Little Hawk 25 Jun 11 - 11:02 PM
Rapparee 25 Jun 11 - 11:25 PM
Acme 25 Jun 11 - 11:59 PM
Little Hawk 26 Jun 11 - 06:06 AM
Rapparee 26 Jun 11 - 10:09 AM
Amos 26 Jun 11 - 11:35 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Jun 11 - 06:54 PM

Amos, that was priceless.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Jun 11 - 10:28 PM

Why...thank you!! I am non-plussed!!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 12:00 AM

Don't be.

Priceless: something upon which no value can be set.
Worthless: without worth or value.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 09:54 AM

I think we have discovered the root of all your difficulties, sirrah--you have been raised under a cloud of confusion, never having understood the difference between zero and infinity.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 10:01 AM

I was raised under an assumption of infinite zeroes, raised to grasp the essential meaning of infinite nothingness. Indeed, good sir, both my mathematics AND philosophy instructors long ago said the I defined infinite nothingness.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 10:53 AM

Hey, MOM, I found the teflon tape and got my favorite sprinkler back in working order. I'll set it up later if the kids want to run through it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 02:11 PM

I was asked to water the flowers (well, ground cover) out in front of the Elks Lodge on Friday morning. I suggested that they just put up a sign asking the Friday night bar crowd to do it, but my suggestion was ignored.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 04:34 PM

You just need to present your suggestion more forcefully, the way John Dillinger did.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 05:25 PM

Wouldn't that piss them off?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 05:43 PM

This is the Elks Lodge we're talking about, not the Legion Hovel. Up at the hovel John Dillinger is treated as a pansy-sniffing poof, as are Bugs Moran, Scarface Capone, Mad Dog Coll, Boone Helm, and Captain Bligh. The folks who frequent the Legion Hovel are tough, tough enough to swim the Portneuf River naked when it's -45F., tough enough to face down a speeding locomotive, tough enough to catch bullets in their teeth. Tough. Not necessarily smart, but tough.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 08:49 PM

I am getting tired of all this empty boasting you do about how tough they are at the Idaho Legion. You be careful, man. I might get angry.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 10:43 PM

Come out and find out for yourself, but you gotta pay yer own fare.

Come visit a land where we let the babies teeth on cactus and grown-ups drink gasoline and pee flame. Visit a place where I once was driving along and when the blue norther hit I drove like hell for home -- and when I got there I found the car's engine was fine but everything south of back seat was frozen solid. Out here, even the women are dead-center shots, as some of them dudes have found out to their dismay and decease. I dare you to come visit Colter's Hell!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 11:12 PM

Bear in mind that Rapparee is a relatively recent convert to the Faith of the Macho Hombre and has only recently been baptized in fire and flame his own self, even though he was definitely suited, qualified and fit for the ritual by reason of prior experience in arms and individual proclivity toward braggadocio and violence; or so he persuaded the Temple's Qualifications Review board at the time.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 22 Jun 11 - 11:25 PM

That's okay, Rap, just make sure you spread them around so they don't kill any spots.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 09:31 AM

Since we're speaking of the application of powerful fluids, here's a strong cuppa Yorkshire Gold tea and a homemade blueberry muffin. MOM slept out on the porch swing again last night. Didn't any of you check on her when you staggered arrived home last night?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 11:24 AM

I drink naught but pure water and teach love and kindness to all.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 12:02 PM

Only to all who will listen--both of them.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 05:14 PM

They who will not listen and learn shall remain unenlightened. Enlightenment cannot be forced upon anyone, but must come from within. I can only guide them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 05:31 PM

One with each hand...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 07:59 PM

Then there will be two more, Amos. And if each guides two more soon all will be enlightened. Even if each one guides one it will happen. Soon, Grasshopper, you might understand. Maybe perhaps.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 08:26 PM

Oh my! As of 6:00 tonight, there have been 1016 children register for our summer reading program at the library. It felt like all of them were there today, running around and yelling. It's a great turnout---but why does it have to be all at once?

Eiseley the Distracted


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 11:05 PM

Many
Librarians
Scream

Most
Librarians
Insanely
Scream

...but they're ONLY children!!!....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 23 Jun 11 - 11:22 PM

MLS - perhaps in this instance, Multiple Listing Service. You've listed many kiddos for the summer program, Ms MLS. :)

Moonglow has pushed back her graduation to next fall. She can push her grade point just enough to graduate Cum Laude, and she'll get early access to some of the graduate school funding, etc. One of the classes she'll take in the fall is an intro to Library Science. This child had a library card when she was three years old (and she SIGNED IT HERSELF!) Okay, at three it was a scribble, but by four she'd taught herself how to write. Anyway, if there was ever a library person, this kid is it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 08:30 AM

I love Rapparee's nasal condescension. It makes my lower lip stick out and quiver. Sheeshe.

Hurray for Moonglow. Hurray for her Mom. Hurray for the valiant Eiseley. And hurray for our beloved KT whose birthday is today.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 10:20 AM

Amos, I have achieved Ragnarok. I can guide others there, if they wish to come.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 10:24 AM

Your benevolence and generosity never fail to amaze me.

Well, almost never.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 10:36 AM

What--never?

Well, hardly ever.

Wikipedia kindly informs us all that in Norse mythology, Ragnarök (Old Norse "final destiny of the gods") is a series of future events, including a great battle foretold to ultimately result in the death of a number of major figures (including the gods Odin, Thor, Týr, Freyr, Heimdall, and Loki), the occurrence of various natural disasters, and the subsequent submersion of the world in water. Afterward, the world will resurface anew and fertile, the surviving and reborn gods will meet, and the world will be repopulated by two human survivors. Ragnarök is an important event in the Norse canon, and has been the subject of scholarly discourse and theory.

The event is attested primarily in the Poetic Edda, compiled in the 13th century from earlier traditional sources, and the Prose Edda, written in the 13th century by Snorri Sturluson. In the Prose Edda, and a single poem in the Poetic Edda, the event is referred to as Ragnarökr or Ragnarökkr (Old Norse "Doom of the Gods"), a usage popularized by 19th century composer Richard Wagner with the title of the last of his Der Ring des Nibelungen operas, Götterdämmerung.

I was only aware of part of this, because I am not BOoque Manne, nor wish to be. To him I would only say:
Fylliz fiǫrvi
feigra manna,
rýđr ragna siǫt
rauđom dreyra.
Svǫrt verđa sólskin
of sumor eptir,
veđr ǫll válynd
Vitođ ér enn, eđa hvat?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 12:33 PM

Ragnarok around our has has for years been an online video game the kids used to pay to join and play. I don't know if they're still playing it.

Dogs (three) settled down in the back. I take a handful of dog treats to the door every so often and they do tricks. Every so often I hear Poppy give Zeke a quick irritated bark. Cinnamon has relaxed. I'm going to pick up another child's wading pool at the grocery store and the back yard will be a dog spa for the next couple of weeks. If any of you wants to take a quick dip, that's okay also. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Hokh-Ptui
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 01:01 PM

We will have to take the Amos while he is in the unconscious state he enters every night. Repair will not take long, as the mind needing repair is smaller than average for your species, which is small indeed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Albert Einstein
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 02:16 PM

Repair will not take long, as the mind needing repair is smaller than average for your species, which is small indeed.

You made a pretty serious spelling error, Hokh-Ptui. As an almost omniscient being, I will hereby give the appropriate correction: "Rapaire will not take long, as the Rapaire is smaller than average for your species, which is small indeed."

Anything to preserve clarity, as I've always said.

E=MC2


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 04:50 PM

Glow BRIGHTLY Moonglow!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 05:15 PM

She'd better glow, 'cause if she don't...well....

Apparently Al Einstein hasn't yet gotten the word that I've changed the spelling of my name, but then he could be doing a Gedankenexperiment on time and whatever it is that passes for reality.

I enjoy Hokh-Ptui's posts, as they confirm something I believe we've all suspected, but I'm not posting them -- just in case you may have thought otherwise.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 05:49 PM

Way to glow, Moonglow! You raised her right, Stilly.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 10:09 PM

I am convinced the Hokh-Ptui is a genuine space alien of an advanced type, and that everything he tells us about Amos is true. He's not of the alien group (the Greys) that has interacted with Shane, though, so I assume he is probably of a different race entirely from them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jun 11 - 11:05 PM

Actually, I first thought he was the Egyptian god of rain and the Nile.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 01:23 AM

Sigh. This stream of incontinent drivel is wearisome. J'en ai marre. Je m'en fous de ces pedas.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Bhork'm-Rif
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 12:12 PM

I am Bhork'm-Rif of the K-tel'Naabi, the most advanced race in interstellar space. It is our opinion that Hokh-Ptui's analyses of the Amos are superficial and inadequate. We intend to beam the Amos up and do extensive research upon his mental and emotional matrices in our continuing endeavour to answer the burning question, "Is there other intelligent life out there in space?" (The general opinion here is, 'No....probably not...', but we remain ever hopeful.)

A few weeks of scanning, probing, and simple intelligence tests should establish clearly whether the Amos deserves to be listed among the ranks of "sentient beings" or whether he is simply a form of mobile sea slug or common mollusk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 12:44 PM

One of these days they'll transport Little Hawk for some of these probes - and won't they be surprised at the number of personalities packed in that bit of biomass!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 12:56 PM

I don't think that's likely--there is a fraternity amongst the high-powered hallucinators, they never pick on each other, kind of like CEOs, or Republicans.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 03:45 PM

What are pedas and why do we need to know ya like em?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 07:47 PM

"they never pick on each other, kind of like CEOs, or Republicans"

Ha! What wishful thinking! What stark naivete! The fact is, both CEOs and Republicans are quite happy to savagely attack and destroy one another as they battle tooth and nail for financial and political gain within their own competitive circles. As a matter of fact, it is the very credo of their existence: "survival of the fittest" (meaning the most amoral and ruthless)

Your evident wish to see them as a single monolithic bloc is as foolish as their corresponding wish to see all "liberals" in that fashion.

In short, sir, you are sailing a ship which lacks a rudder and has sprung a serious leak. ;-D


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 10:34 PM

Not to mention the bilious binnacle, the starboard port, and the cumbersome keel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 10:35 PM

Oh, by the way -- MOM!!! DIBS ON 41114 !!!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,The Intergalactic Overlord
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 10:56 PM

Just do what you're told. Probe the Amos and see if you people can find any indication at all that he's a sentient being or just a collection of miscellaneous protoplasm. Now cut out this "I'm better than you" crap or I'll swat your collective fannies until you can't sit down for a month.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 11:02 PM

The Intergalactic Overlord has spoken!!!!!!

Where are the probes?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 11:25 PM

I saw Eiseley today and she returned my Silver Wand. No longer am I subject to lycanthrohydrophobia, as my silver wand protects me from rabid werewolves (loup-garous rabiques to our Cajun friends, Northern Neighbors and folks south of Paris).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 Jun 11 - 11:59 PM

So now you're the happy WANDerer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jun 11 - 06:06 AM

That must be quite a load off your mind...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jun 11 - 10:09 AM

You can never tell when you might be attacked by a rabid werewolf. It's best to be prepared. I also carry a silver dagger, a blunderbuss loaded with silver shot, and bathe daily in silver nitrate solution followed by an applications of garlic oil. So far it's been very effective. Not even a cold, much less a werewolf, and people always respect my "personal space."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jun 11 - 11:35 AM

With so much preparation against an attack by werewolves, I am sure you will fall to the rapacious appetites of a Kraken instead.

A


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