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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 12 Jul 03 - 11:00 PM
rangeroger 13 Jul 03 - 01:09 AM
Tweed 13 Jul 03 - 10:04 AM
Rapparee 13 Jul 03 - 12:03 PM
Rapparee 13 Jul 03 - 12:10 PM
Rapparee 13 Jul 03 - 01:50 PM
Little Hawk 13 Jul 03 - 02:17 PM
GUEST 14 Jul 03 - 12:44 PM
Rapparee 14 Jul 03 - 01:31 PM
GUEST,MMario 14 Jul 03 - 01:40 PM
Rapparee 14 Jul 03 - 02:46 PM
CarolC 14 Jul 03 - 03:40 PM
Kim C 14 Jul 03 - 04:16 PM
Rustic Rebel 14 Jul 03 - 07:33 PM
Rapparee 14 Jul 03 - 08:40 PM
Dave the Gnome 15 Jul 03 - 10:48 AM
Little Hawk 15 Jul 03 - 10:48 AM
MMario 15 Jul 03 - 04:17 PM
GUEST,Thespian 15 Jul 03 - 04:35 PM
GUEST,MMario 15 Jul 03 - 04:37 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 15 Jul 03 - 05:14 PM
Rapparee 15 Jul 03 - 06:48 PM
Kim C 15 Jul 03 - 07:00 PM
GUEST,Thespian 15 Jul 03 - 07:17 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 15 Jul 03 - 07:33 PM
Tweed 15 Jul 03 - 07:57 PM
GUEST,Penelope Rutledge 15 Jul 03 - 08:26 PM
GUEST,Thespian 15 Jul 03 - 08:29 PM
Rapparee 15 Jul 03 - 08:40 PM
Rustic Rebel 15 Jul 03 - 11:59 PM
Tweed 16 Jul 03 - 12:01 AM
Rapparee 16 Jul 03 - 08:56 AM
Rapparee 16 Jul 03 - 09:12 AM
MMario 16 Jul 03 - 09:13 AM
Rapparee 16 Jul 03 - 10:00 AM
GUEST,MMario 16 Jul 03 - 10:16 AM
Rustic Rebel 16 Jul 03 - 10:23 PM
Rustic Rebel 16 Jul 03 - 10:25 PM
Rapparee 16 Jul 03 - 10:37 PM
GUEST,Thespian 16 Jul 03 - 11:04 PM
Amos 16 Jul 03 - 11:15 PM
Rapparee 17 Jul 03 - 06:40 PM
Rustic Rebel 17 Jul 03 - 09:10 PM
Little Hawk 17 Jul 03 - 09:35 PM
Rustic Rebel 17 Jul 03 - 10:36 PM
Rapparee 18 Jul 03 - 08:55 AM
Little Hawk 18 Jul 03 - 10:05 AM
Little Hawk 20 Jul 03 - 07:11 PM
Amos 20 Jul 03 - 07:20 PM
Rapparee 20 Jul 03 - 11:15 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jul 03 - 11:00 PM

This
is the 701st post to this thread. This post may go well with hushpuppies, in which sugar doesn't belong.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: rangeroger
Date: 13 Jul 03 - 01:09 AM

Congratulations.

I do believe this has become the longest thread ever. It has bested the "Killing the Thread" thread.

rr


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 13 Jul 03 - 10:04 AM

Rapaire, yore 701st post to MOAB has disturbed me so much that I have cancelled my trip to the Andes. What a concept....I can see the priveledged FatCats, their teeth filed razor sharp, harvesting and roasting trailer folk to combat the food shortage thus eliminating world poverty. There is still the problem of methane as farmers will no doubt fill the livestock's trough with cheap legumes to fatten them up for market. Po'Boy sammitch takes on a whole new meaning....
Fantastic BS. MOAB is back on track once more.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jul 03 - 12:03 PM

I notice that "Sacrifice To Moloch" has more posts than "What Do You Call Your Thingie?".

Maybe I'll start a new thread, "What do you call sacrificing your thingie to Moloch?".... Toss in a giant squid and a tavern and it might be MOAB in postings.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jul 03 - 12:10 PM

No, I think I'll call it "Is sacrificing your giant squid's thingie to Moloch in a tavern folk music?". Then it can post above the salt....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Jul 03 - 01:50 PM

Ah, I don't know what to say.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jul 03 - 02:17 PM

No shit?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 12:44 PM

when completing an ultra-secret project is it appropriate to shriek the news to the skies - or should one just wait for others to stumble over the evidence?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 01:31 PM

Well, if you're the shy, retiring, modest sort like I am, you wait for folks to find the evidence and, if they don't, you just sigh deeply and know in your heart that you have done both well and good.

On the other hand, someone like MMario would probably wait a day or so and then hire the Goodyear blimp.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 01:40 PM

gee - I was actually considering renting the message board in Times Square - and a 60 second spot follow 'Graham Norton'

Do you think I should really get the GoodYear Blimp?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 02:46 PM

If you're close enough to Philly you rent the Liberty Bell -- the current administration will do 'most anything for money.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: CarolC
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 03:40 PM

Well, I'm sufficiently confused, so he can't have been all that obvious about whatever it is...

On the other hand, I'm sufficiently confused most of the time, so maybe whatever it is you people are talking about is obvious to everyone but me.

On the other other hand, I'm sitting in a hotel in Detroit (well, actually Dearborn), working on an ultra-secret project, but I'm not going to tell any of you guys about it. Well... not yet anyway. But when I do tell you about it, I can assure you it won't have anything to do with Elvis. Well, it probably won't have anything to do with Elvis. It definitely won't have anything to do with William Shatner ...maybe.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Kim C
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 04:16 PM

Dang. I don't have any secrets just now.

There is college money for older students - but most of the time, you have to already BE in school to get it. Which means I still have to have something up front. I have applied for a job at the college I want to attend - if I went to work there, I'd get to go Almost Free. (not quite, but Almost) They haven't called me about it, but I'm going to keep checking on their other job openings.

In the meantime, I think I'll keep pursuing the personal trainer thing I started awhile back.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 07:33 PM

Tribes of cannabals were getting sick and dieing and it was discovered that a certain enzyme in human meat was the culprit. When they stopped eating humans the people got healthy again.
I'll just go get myself another pork chop in a can now....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Jul 03 - 08:40 PM

Oh, Reb, it's lots worse that just kuru!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 10:48 AM

I didn't know this thread had been acronymised (is there such a word?) as MOAB! Has anyone already said that Stephen Fry's autobiography is called Moab is my washpot? All makes sense now...

Cheers

DtG


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 10:48 AM

He wasn't being obvious, Carol, so much as oblivious...

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 04:17 PM

I have oblivious-ness down to a science. In fact, I probably qualify for a MoO (Master of Oblivion) or even a POB (Perfectley Oblivious Bloke)

As I have said before - you don't have to hit me over the head with a two-by-four more then five or six times.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Thespian
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 04:35 PM

Yes, Dave the Gnome, it all does make sense. There is a pattern in Chaos, and MOAB proves it. MOAB is so universal that it encompasses all things...and all minds, though most are too preoccupied to realize it. Stephen Fry's auto-biography reveals that he too was enlightened to the power of MOAB!

Mmario, I believe that if you go back through the MOAB thread a few hundred posts, you shall see that the KihgKhandu has made Rustic Rebel the Royal POB...the Purveyor of Beauty.

One thing one must remember about MOAB...the very essence of this wonderful thread is epitomized by the Great and Virile William Shatner, as I am sure, you realize.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 04:37 PM

but thespian - if I did that I wouldn't be oblivious.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 05:14 PM

I'm stunned! I'm shocked! I'm, once again, totally flumoxed!

"Why?" you ask.

Well, I just this very moment returned from a trip to the Dollar General store. As I was standing in the checkout line I happened to glance at the spinner-rack of $1.00 novels and what should I see? A Star Trek novel (or maybe it was a novelization) actually written by The Shat himself! I was stunned! Little Hawk would have been stunned too. But, he would be stunned to think that the literary endeavors of W. Shatner should be held in such low regard as to be sold at "Cheap and Disposable R Us" for a meazly buck a copy! I was simply stunned to realize that some editor somewhere actually let Willy the Shat write a book!

By the way, I did not buy one of the things.


Bruce


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 06:48 PM

An author search at Barnes and Noble.com for "Shatner, William" brings up 66 entries, from Star Trek novels to a book on pet allergies to a book of horse photographs.

He is, indeed, a true Renaissance Man.

Now, as for indexing or otherwise attempting to grasp the content of MOAB, I suggest that it be viewed fractally, and if the fractal shape in the complex plane were extended infinitely above and below the plane as a fractal-shaped "cylinder", and treated as a wire that produces an electrical field, then the electrostatic potential for any point z0 is approximated by by appropriate equation(s) provided enough iterations (n) are done that |zn| is large. Electrostatics, of course, can in this case be viewed as four-dimensional quasi-shapes. I'm certain that, given the forgoing discussion, each of you can determine your own search algorithm. And please, don't simply say "I got algorithm, I got muzak."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Kim C
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 07:00 PM

Yes, but can he yodel and stand on one foot at the same time?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Thespian
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 07:17 PM

Rapaire, you have hit the nail on the head! Indeed, it is almost as though you had read a recent essay of mine, which is to be published in the October edition of "The Psuedo-Scientific Wanderings", which deals with MOAB in the exact same style that you have demonstrated today!

Bee-Dubya-Ell, you must be unfamiliar with the "WSFE" Act of 1968. It was signed into law by LBJ after before the melee of the Democratic National Convention, as a means to rekindle a sense of credibility to the National and Regional Democrats.

The "WSFE Act" (William Shatner for Everyone) insured that all people, even the poorest of families in Alabama, could have Shatner material to enjoy in their homes. It could only be done with the magnaminous generosity of Shatner, who readily gave his seal of approval. As a result of this, even to this day, Shatner material can be found at an extremely low price in Dollar Stores across North and Central America.

It is important for children to have affordable shoes, but of what use are shoes if one has no Shatner?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 07:33 PM

Personally, I subscribe to the Holographic MOAB Paradigm. That is to say that all of the information in the MOAB is distributed equally throughout its component parts. It is, therefore, not necessary to read the entire MOAB to understand it. If one thoroughly understands this comma, (Yes, that one. The one that came right after the word "comma".) then one will understand the entire MOAB.

Of course, such a holographic interpretation leads one to wonder why we fools continue to feed more fodder to the obviously sick beast. If the entire meaning of the MOAB can be intuited by proper consideration of the least of its components, then why add more components? Ah! But therein lies the beauty of holographic interpretation. As further posts are made, the essence of all that was posted previously is subtly altered so as to reflect the MOAB not just as it was, but as it is, and as it shall be. If You come back to that comma above in a few days you will notice that its essence has subtly changed in response to the posts that will have taken place since this one.

To paraphrase Joseph Keller:

"That's quite an interpretation, that Holographic MOAB Interpretation."

"Best one there is."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 07:57 PM

God almighty, what utter BS!! You all tie for first class BSE's (BullShitExtremists) and deserve this prize I happened across accidentally while researching a cure for pore old Amos' acute anal-retentiveness.

***Fantastic Prize***

Also to GUEST Thespian, I know that you are in actuality the British socialite and crackhoe Penelope Rutledge. You fool no one, as you must know already. Unmask yoreself and step into the light!

Yerz,
Tweed
KOTROT
Duckst to Dawn


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Penelope Rutledge
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 08:26 PM

My dear misguided Tweed,

I am somewhat aghast and a bit concerned with your fixation that you have attached to me.
I am also somewhat insulted that you would even suggest that I would consider posting to such an imbecilic thread as this "Mother of all Inane" threads. Dear sir, my time is better spent with a more elite class of people than those found in this septic tank of rotting humanity.
However, I am incensed that you would suggest that I would sign in to such a debacle as a guest under an assumed name. I am quite proud of my heritage and I shall ever sign in to any and all forums under my name, Penelope Rutledge.
Perhaps, you fixation is based upon a fantasy that you have about me. Do believe me, Mr. Tweed, that if such fantasies exist, they are merely that and nothing more.
Might I suggest that upon the onset of entertaining such decadent fantasies, you quickly take a long, cold shower.
Please, if there is any understanding left in your poor deluded mind, cease to use my name and/or my person in your fantasies, and in this forum.

Penelope Rutledge


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Thespian
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 08:29 PM

Tweed, that link you gave had been given on the MOAB thread a mere two days ago! What is worse is that Amos tried to take credit for it on the "Answer for Spaw" thread earlier today. And now, you have claimed it. What's next? Will Amos invent the wheel, and will you try to usurp it?

And who the hell is "Penelope Rutledge"?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 08:40 PM

But, Bee-dubya, you yourself point out that a holographic model determines past, present and future postings. Were this the case, it would be possible to use MOAB for more than mathematical determinants and/or algorithmic indices. It would be possible (to cite but two examples among many that come to mind) to find the winning lottery numbers for every lottery anywhere, or determine in advance the winner of next year's presidential election (we all KNOW who the losers will be, regardless of who wins).

But more importantly, and more to the point, is the simple fact that analysis shows conclusively that MOAB data is not evenly and randomly distributed throughout the informational matrix, such as would happen if, for example, cattle were randomly and evenly distributed in a pasture, but actually occuring in dataclumps, such as would be expected if cattle in a pasture grouped themselves together in "mini-herds" of varying sizes.

This was determined by the most rigorous imperical testing, using destructive methodologies borrowed from materials testing. The most important of these involved the seismic behavior of waves passing through dataclumps after the explosion of 2.7 kilograms of trinitrotoulene and recorded upon an EEG machine borrowed from St. Mungo's.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 15 Jul 03 - 11:59 PM

Little Hawk, I need an answer from you if you can....
Is it true dachshunds with erections can't climb stairs?

From the other POB


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Tweed
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 12:01 AM

Dere Mz.Rutledge,
You just could not stay away from here could you? I submit that you entertain yore own fantasies too bizarre and corrupted to describe here in front of the other inmates, az no doubt they would become over agitated and perform very unusual acts upon yore scrawny carcass.

GUEST Thespian, please accept this peace offering that I only just now discovered on Google wholly by accident! I'm sure there's never been anything quite like it here on Mudcat.

Rapaire...you have gone insane....it was bound to happen. Once a great and intelligent mind now wallowing in this cesspool of BS. Another clump in the patty party.

And I?...I no longer even check other threads on this magnificent board of information....so great is the draw of MOAB...awful awful......syncopated algorhythms, ....HOOOOO...more meds, more Coronas...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 08:56 AM

Rustic, I don't know what sort of answer LH can give to your question about dachshunds, but from my own observation of one (neutered male) I can assure you that at least the head of the non-erect can suffer "rug rash" from a variety of sources. I understand also, from very recent information, that if the skin of a dachshund's penis is inadvertantly sewn into the stitches of a stomach operation the dog becomes uncomfortable and can even go off his feed.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 09:12 AM

I should clarify: a stomach operation on the dacshund.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 09:13 AM

Rapaire - that verges on both WAY too much information and "non-BS" status!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 10:00 AM

Mario, I didn't mention the reason for the stomach surgery, did I? It was to implant a cup and a half of "beads" in the poor pup's stomach. These are actually a medicine being tested to see if the it can slow, or even reverse, the prostate cancer the poor little guy (15 human years old) has. (I don't know what it is, but it's not radioactive and it doesn't cause the side effects associated with chemo in humans.)

His problem was discovered when the Dept. of Veterinary Medicine at Purdue took out the stitches -- and also corrected what his owner, a quilter, called "a mis-stitch."

Actually, if you have any good thoughts to spare for a nice small dog, it'd be appreciated in Valpariso, Indiana.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 10:16 AM

Poor l'il guy! (For a number of reasons!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 10:23 PM

Well now Rapaire that is a bit of information I will always hold near and dear about the Dachshunds. Rug Rash. I bet that's about the only variety of animal that can claim that fame unless we can call Loooooooooong John Silver a midget with a loooooong digit,and I ain't talkin' about a finger or a toe.
But that's not the end of my tail (forgive the pun) I walked into a tavern tonight and what do you think I saw running around the bar? A wiener-dog. So I ask the bar the same question, all I got was some smirks and giggles. No answer about it climbing stairs. Goes to show how much a lover of the wiener-dog pays attention to the wiener of the wiener dog doesn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 10:25 PM

Of coarse that's with you as an exception Rapaire.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 10:37 PM

The dachshund with whom I am familiar climbs the stairs. Being neutered when he was a puppy, I'm pretty certain he has never experienced an erection. He HAS had diarrhea, though, if that counts.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Thespian
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 11:04 PM

I suppose at this point, since the subject of discussion has turned, we should bring up the thread from a couple of years back called "Non-music; Erection" or something like that. I don't know how to make the necessary blue clicky to link to it.

Perhaps Tweed and Penelope Rutledge could read it together!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Jul 03 - 11:15 PM

Here's that Erection you were looking for sir....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jul 03 - 06:40 PM

Amos, there are far far better erections here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 17 Jul 03 - 09:10 PM

Well there is a circle of life going on here. Look who started the erection thread, non other than the Grand King himself, Khandu. Ha!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 17 Jul 03 - 09:35 PM

I called my local bakery. They refuse to decorate cakes with the following words: c*nt, c*cks*cker, sh*t (and derivatives thereof), f*ck (and derivatives thereof), bollocks (but bullochs is okay), p*nis, t*ts (and derivatives thereof), solypsism, n*gger, and the phrase "weapons of mass destruction are located here".

I think this is all quite understandable, except in the case of solypsism...I believe the problem with that word is that they're not sure what it means, but they're too insecure to admit it. No one objected to putting "William Shatner is Godlike and incredibly sexy!!!" on a cake, because let's face it...he is. This is good news for our upcoming Kirkathon Festival at the WSSBA in beautiful lakeland Orillia, where contestants will strive to win the coveted Hamlet Unleashed Award for doing the most accurate James T. Kirk dramatic impressions. The winner gets a solid gold (well, okay, brass-plated composite resin) tribble that weighs in at 35 pounds and makes a super conversation piece or doorstop.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 17 Jul 03 - 10:36 PM

I just saw Willian Shatner stared in a movie called the Babysitter. The babysitter took over his family, that's about all I caught about the movie. It looked like a B rate but I guess that might seem impossible that William would be in a B rate wouldn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Jul 03 - 08:55 AM

"I just saw Willian Shatner stared in a movie called the Babysitter."

Yeah, that's his strongest trait as an actor.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Jul 03 - 10:05 AM

Actually, he frequently has appeared in "B" movies. Even "C" movies. And there is a reason for it. Bill is a Man of great compassion. Because of this he lends his incredible acting talents to lacklustre movies that would otherwise have no redeeming features whatsoever. It's an act of spontaneous generosity from a Man who can basically pick any part he wants any time he wants. For similar reasons he has done various tacky TV ads for grocery chains and so on. He doesn't have to, he just can't resist helping the lame ducks in this world, that's all. What a Man, eh?

(this oughta drive MMario nuts... :-)

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Jul 03 - 07:11 PM

I mean if he ever reads it, that is....

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Jul 03 - 07:20 PM

LH:

Just so you know, and as a reflection on the basic nature of the thing, "solipsism" contains no "why". Nor any "y", anyway. True solipsists always know why.


Function:       noun
Etymology:       Latin solus alone + ipse self
Date:       1874
: a theory holding that the self can know nothing but its own modifications and that the self is the only existent thing


(Merriam-Webster on-line dictionary)

Regards,


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Jul 03 - 11:15 PM

Yeah, Amos. Since you didn't exist it was necessary for me to invent you. And you. And you, and you, and you, and you, and you waaaaaaaaaaay over there.

You will all thank me later for your continued existence.


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