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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Acme 05 Aug 12 - 01:31 PM
Amos 05 Aug 12 - 01:21 PM
Rapparee 04 Aug 12 - 10:31 PM
Rapparee 04 Aug 12 - 02:45 PM
Little Hawk 04 Aug 12 - 01:50 PM
Amos 04 Aug 12 - 12:55 PM
Rapparee 04 Aug 12 - 10:13 AM
Rapparee 03 Aug 12 - 04:46 PM
Amos 03 Aug 12 - 01:10 PM
Acme 03 Aug 12 - 12:26 PM
Acme 03 Aug 12 - 12:26 PM
Acme 03 Aug 12 - 12:24 PM
Amos 03 Aug 12 - 11:57 AM
Acme 03 Aug 12 - 11:11 AM
Amos 03 Aug 12 - 10:34 AM
Rapparee 03 Aug 12 - 09:40 AM
Rapparee 02 Aug 12 - 10:31 PM
Rapparee 02 Aug 12 - 06:09 PM
Amos 02 Aug 12 - 03:45 PM
Rapparee 02 Aug 12 - 02:30 PM
Acme 02 Aug 12 - 12:22 PM
Amos 02 Aug 12 - 11:50 AM
Rapparee 02 Aug 12 - 10:00 AM
Acme 02 Aug 12 - 12:54 AM
Rapparee 02 Aug 12 - 12:16 AM
Amos 01 Aug 12 - 11:41 AM
Rapparee 01 Aug 12 - 09:09 AM
Rapparee 31 Jul 12 - 10:20 PM
Amos 31 Jul 12 - 10:05 PM
Rapparee 31 Jul 12 - 09:05 PM
Acme 31 Jul 12 - 08:58 PM
Rapparee 31 Jul 12 - 03:02 PM
Amos 31 Jul 12 - 12:57 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 31 Jul 12 - 12:32 PM
Amos 31 Jul 12 - 11:49 AM
Amos 31 Jul 12 - 09:41 AM
Rapparee 31 Jul 12 - 09:21 AM
Rapparee 30 Jul 12 - 08:17 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 30 Jul 12 - 08:00 PM
Rapparee 30 Jul 12 - 06:31 PM
Rapparee 30 Jul 12 - 06:21 PM
Amos 30 Jul 12 - 06:12 PM
Rapparee 30 Jul 12 - 05:25 PM
Little Hawk 30 Jul 12 - 02:45 PM
Amos 30 Jul 12 - 02:38 PM
Acme 30 Jul 12 - 01:55 PM
Rapparee 30 Jul 12 - 09:14 AM
Amos 30 Jul 12 - 01:10 AM
Little Hawk 29 Jul 12 - 08:34 PM
Rapparee 29 Jul 12 - 06:27 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 05 Aug 12 - 01:31 PM

If I were Amos and he were in North Texas, finding a body of water for the kayak sounds like a great idea. Have to avoid all of the power boats, though. Texas is crummy with them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 05 Aug 12 - 01:21 PM

I've mined and assayed in Kern County, and I can tell you that that level may be profitable now, but it sure wasn't back then. We busted our asses breaking and digging and picking quartz veins, and melting out samples. The direct path to profitability, which we couldn't use for good reason, is cyanide leaching.

As the song says,

"I nearly starved to death, boys,
He did mistreat me so.
An' I never saved a dollar up...
In the pay of Diamond Joe."

And thanks for the really wonderful Name Post!! It made my heart swell up! LOL



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 12 - 10:31 PM

The Legend Of The Lost Silver Mine

It was back around 1840, or so the old timers say. Three men were kinda quiet about what they were doing out in the hills, but they seemed to have money. At least, they'd leave town and come back with money. Solid, good money, not notes from some bank that could fold up any minute. They were good folks, and one day they packed up and left town, never to be seen again.

Nobody really knew their names, but that was to be expected at that time and place. Sometimes it was better not to inquire to deeply into someone's past or present.

Word finally sort of drifted back to town that the three men were mining silver. They'd melt it out of the ore and take the raw silver to the city and exchange it at the banks for dollars. The farmers of the area doubted it, and eventually it passed into legend and even then was nearly forgotten.
----------------------------------
Our friend Niles heard about it from an OLD old-timer and he told my brother. Both of them being retired gentlemen (and slightly just this side of totally nuts) they collected some likely-looking rocks. My brother gave half of one and some blue-tinted stuff that appeared to be sandstone to his oldest daughter (who works in a water testing lab) for a quick field test with nitric acid.

The blue-tinted stuff came up as...just an odd colored sandstone. The other, however, seemed to include silver!

So the other half of the likely chunk was sent off for a fire assay. The results are back: 0.003 troy ounces GOLD per ton of rock and 0.004 troy ounces of silver. Seems like the legend may have had some truth to it!

Obviously I haven't told you the location. I will say that it's somewhere in Illinois (!!) in a belt 200 miles wide that stretches from Quincy to Danville.

I don't want to be the cause of The Great Central Illinois Gold Rush Of 2012.

(Note too that the lowest currently profitable level of gold ore per ton of rock is 0.025 in Kern County, California. That's just a teeny bit more than the assay results my brother has!)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 12 - 02:45 PM

❦AMOS! AMOS!❦


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Aug 12 - 01:50 PM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMOSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 04 Aug 12 - 12:55 PM

I love it when you ut my name in capital letters. It makes me feel all special, like. Do it again!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Aug 12 - 10:13 AM

Alright, Mom! Cadging smokes from gutter bums and you all the while supported by that lamp post, down among the dregs of the BS section! You're lucky I got there before the paddy wagon turned the corner or we'd be bailing you out of the drunk tank again! Look at you! Just look at you! The stains on you chin tell me that you've even been chewing tobacco and dipping snoose again! And you reek of cheap beer and booze! You're disgracing the...what? AMOS is still down there somewhere? HE took you there, got drunk, passed out, and you ROLLED him? Hehe...I mean, you rolled AMOS? Waddidya git? Anything good? Ooooooh...he really DOES love his kayak, doesn't he? And he knows the sea in the Biblical sense! What else is in his wallet? C'mon, lemme see!....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 04:46 PM

Well, I had blood sucked from my body early this morning and money sucked from my charge card later. But some was for books, so that's okay.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 01:10 PM

I yam taking credit for an assist.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 12:26 PM

45554


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 12:26 PM

You can see it coming now, I think . . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 12:24 PM

Yes. An elegant name for Worm Poop.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 11:57 AM

Indeed, and apologies for the missing "t". Castings. Yes. Organic, for sure. Plants, check.

I am vewwy tiwed and wanna sweep. But duties call from every point. Ah, woe, no rest for the wicked. Nor even for the bright and virtuous sons of Mom.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 11:11 AM

"Worm castings!" Now you're speaking my organic gardener language. They're very good for your garden.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 10:34 AM

Worm casings!

BTW if you have not read Cloud Atlas, by David Mitchell I recommend it most highly. A tour de force.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 09:40 AM

Vampires! Vampyres!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 10:31 PM

GREENWOOD
Peter Yarrow- ©1973 Pepamar Music ASCAP

I've seen a thousand people kneel in silence
And I've seen them face the rifles with their songs
I always thought that we could end the killing
But now I live in fear that I was wrong

The killer and the cynic waltz together
Their eyes are turned into their skulls
They do not feel the bullets in the bodies
They do not hear the dolphins or the gulls

If we do these things in the greenwood,
what will happen in the dry?

If we don't stop there'll come a time when women
With barren wombs will bitterly rejoice
With breasts that dry and never fill with promise
Gladly they'll not suckle one more life

Is this then the whimper and the ending?
The impotence of people raised on fear,
A fear that blinds the sense of common oneness
Common love and life or death are here

If we do these things in the greenwood,
what will happen in the dry?

Will no one light the candle in the darkness
Will no one be my guide, not let me fall
I've lost the sense that tells me where the path is
I feel the chill of winter in my soul

There's no way I can say the words more plainly
There's no one left to point at anymore
It's you and me and we must make the choice now
And not destroy the life we're living for

If we do these things in the greenwood,
what will happen in the dry?
If we do these things in the greenwood,
what will happen in the dry?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 06:09 PM

Exactement, mon vieux, exactement. Como un caballero no voy a explicar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 03:45 PM

Oublier je disais quelque chose autour de les demoiselles...il y a quelques-unes truc le meilleur pas regardé en trop de profondément

"Forget I said some thing around some ladies...there are someones thing the better not viewed in too much deepness."


Ah, les Americains!! Quelle finesse!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 02:30 PM

Oublier je disais quelque chose autour de les demoiselles...il y a quelques-unes truc le meilleur pas regardé en trop de profondément.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 12:22 PM

These days an unearthed tree frog wouldn't shiver in the sunlight, it would shrivel into a raisin.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 11:50 AM

I love it when his literary soul is temporarily exposed, shivering in the sunlight like an unearthed treefrog...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 10:00 AM

I know the art of metapyrics...does that count? I learned it when I was very young. When I was young and innocent and before I lost my youth and winning grin to The Knowledge Of The World and the defenses of poesy of Phillip Sidney. Oh, to have again my youthful innocence and joy! Alas, it is all lost to me now, buried under the rubble of a life, if not well-lived, at least fully lived! So I shall not lament and weep for what once was, and shall simply let the pen of Time write "Paid" to those poker winnings (and the interest appertaining thereto) owed to me since 1966 and to the allegations that my four aces were obtained by manual dexterity and the use of a shiner rather than a smile from Dame Fortune. Oh, ou est l'argent (et les demoiselles) d'antan?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 12:54 AM

I love that one Amos. You need to record it.

It hit 109 here today. It's getting a little warmish again.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Aug 12 - 12:16 AM

Mom! Hanging around with failed drug tests and Mitt Romney! Really!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Aug 12 - 11:41 AM

(Fade in, Eagles-style steels and guitar backup)

Desperado--
You better come to your senses.
You been mixing up tenses
And confusing the truth
ANd ya know, freedom?
Well, it's yours for the betting
But there's no sense regretting
Your long-vanished youth.

Don't ya mess around with honesty
It won't getcha where you're going
THe open straight is always your best shot.
And it seems to me you oughta try
To do a better job of knowing
'Cause it's never cool to tell yourself you're hot. Oh,

Desperado,
You oughta take up line dancin'
And foreswear naked prancing
In the meadow at night.
'Cause ya know, moonlight,
Well, it just doesn't suit ya,
And some rancher might shoot ya
Before the dawn light.

Whatcha really truly do deserve
Is to live in some fine mansion
Where the servants all run hot and cold for you
But you'll never make that scene until
You learn the art of scansion
And rhyme and maybe metaphorics, too!

Oh, Desperado...(fade out on loop)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Aug 12 - 09:09 AM

No, I'm a gun-flinger. I fling guns at people. Got New York Jake right in the tummy with a .45 just yesterday afternoon. Used the old side-arm throw from the left side, like a frisbee. Doubled him right over.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 10:20 PM

Alright, she left here so inebriated that her son had to drive her home.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 10:05 PM

Rapp:

You are an insensitive wank-wit, a shadow-flinger, a wastrel and a do-no-good. I send you fie.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 09:05 PM

Eiseley was here and left here sober!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 08:58 PM

I have a lot of good microphones that were my dad's - they go back to the 80' and 90's. Do you suppose they can match today's electronics?

Looks like 21 posts till a nice spinner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 03:02 PM

Heck, you'll probably have a COMPLETELY solo gig...no audience. But as I hope to get away I'll be happy to sit in the front row, eat watermelon, and spit the seeds at you. Extra points if any go into that hole in the guitar.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 12:57 PM

Honestly, I do not think riches and fame are in my destiny. I can make do in retirement and record some stuff and perhaps that will suffice, maybe even sell some CDs if I am lucky, under my "Mudcat Amos" brand.

Hey!! I'm doing a solo gig for thirty minutes at the Getaway this year!! Puff me up and call me fatty!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 12:32 PM

Will ya still talk to us when yer rich and famous?

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 11:49 AM

One of my forward-looking projects is laying down recordings of a lot of songs. To that end I have just ordered the incomparable A&H mixer seen here as well as this inimitable studio microphone. Soon I will be a rock star! Mwahahaha....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 09:41 AM

I'd like to go to Nova Scotia again. Been a while.

I AM going to Raleigh/Durham.

And I have five weeks of work left.

And there's this ketch in the Bahamas...



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jul 12 - 09:21 AM

MOM!! You're NOT going to Nova Scotia, so stop hanging around in the gutter talking to that other thread about it! Yes, it's a nice enough place but you know you just want to know if everyone wears kilts. They don't.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 08:17 PM

Yeah, you did. Wimp. Anybody can deal with cheetahs and stuff, but nuns??? In a parochial school??? Why, Sister Mary de Sade alone traumatized a whole generation. My mother still remembered what they had done to her when she went there and would never talk about it, kinda like a veteran of horrible combat where her position had been overrun and the gunships and napalm and bombs had to be called in on herself. Whenever we'd ask about her school days she'd get that thousand-yard stare of someone who has seen too much and just sigh deeply.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 08:00 PM

Geez, Rap...you were brought up in one of them Catholic schools? With the big nuns whackin' you with rulers and stealin' yer pants and generally terrorizin' you?

Man, that explains a lot. I feel a new depth of compassion and understandin' for you that I never have before. I gotta cut you some slack in future, cos you gotta be sufferin' way worse from the past traumas than I had expected. I mean, hey, I hadda grow up in the jungle, menaced by predators and tribal hunters, and sleepin' out in the rain...but I had it easy compared to you!

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 06:31 PM

Come to think of it, Vic wasn't around much after that. Nobody really knew what happened to him. Some kids are said to have found his bloody shirt stuffed into the convent's trash can but that was just a rumor, I think. Attention was diverted shortly after that when the nuns discovered that some eighth grade boys were de-pantsing seventh grade boys in a shed on the playground and throwing their pants into the alley, forcing the seventh graders to retrieve them in their underpants. ALL eighth grade boys were confined to their classrooms, the girls taken to the gym, and the boys addressed by the Pastor about their bodies being Temples of the Holy Ghost and stuff like that. Apparently the Powers That Be thought there was some sort of homosexual orgies going on, however we had no idea what they were talking about (other than it had something to do with s*x). We all thought that it was in good clean fun. No, I don't know what the girls did while we were being lectured.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 06:21 PM

We tried that, but we're talking CATHOLIC school here Amos -- with nuns!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 06:12 PM

See, if Vic had been smart and applied apathetic indifference in carefully measured amounts, the destruction would have been much better contained.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 05:25 PM

Actually, that applies to any problem, including deriving square roots arithmetically. When we had to do that in grade school, Vic put some cherry bombs under the teacher's chair and that took care of that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 02:45 PM

Rap, that is exactly what Bush, Cheney, Wolfowitz and various other luminaries in the late 90s New World Order planning crew had in mind when they wanted to launch some wars to get control of Middle Eastern and Caspian oil....but they needed to somehow get the American public to acquiese, despite the fact that no nation in this world would be stupid enough to provide an excuse by openly attacking the USA and providing a "Pearl Harbour level event".

The answer is simple. Just as you said.

"There is no problem in politics which is so big or so complicated that it cannot be solved by the proper calculation and placement of the correct amount of high explosives." And by well orchestrated media coverage too, of course, but that's inevitable, so why worry?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 02:38 PM

You don't have to overcomplicate things--an applied dose of uncaring apathy will handle any computational problem.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 01:55 PM

High explosives be damned - simply change out the power supply and see if it works.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 09:14 AM

Back when I was winding the mainsprings and firing up the boilers that kept the computers running, we had a saying that was very apropos. Perhaps it's time to share it.

There is no problem in Computer Science which is so big or so complicated that it cannot be solved by the proper calculation and placement of the correct amount of high explosives.


It helps to remember that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jul 12 - 01:10 AM

They say that desperarte times call for desperate measures, but that's what they would say, isn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Jul 12 - 08:34 PM

.yllis eb t'noD


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jul 12 - 06:27 PM

.rehtie daed on si luaP .egassem cinatas a teg ton lliw uoy sdrawkcab siht daer uoy fI


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