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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Rapparee 03 Dec 11 - 01:29 PM
Little Hawk 03 Dec 11 - 01:15 PM
Rapparee 03 Dec 11 - 01:08 PM
Little Hawk 03 Dec 11 - 01:03 PM
Amos 03 Dec 11 - 10:46 AM
Rapparee 03 Dec 11 - 10:05 AM
GUEST,Guest from Sanity 03 Dec 11 - 04:00 AM
Acme 03 Dec 11 - 01:46 AM
Rapparee 02 Dec 11 - 11:13 PM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 11 - 09:20 PM
Amos 02 Dec 11 - 08:34 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 11 - 08:16 PM
gnu 02 Dec 11 - 06:51 PM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 11 - 06:28 PM
GUEST,Guest from Sanity 02 Dec 11 - 06:24 PM
GUEST,Eiseley 02 Dec 11 - 05:32 PM
gnu 02 Dec 11 - 04:47 PM
Amos 02 Dec 11 - 04:43 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 11 - 04:23 PM
Amos 02 Dec 11 - 02:58 PM
Rapparee 02 Dec 11 - 09:29 AM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 11 - 12:58 AM
Rapparee 02 Dec 11 - 12:44 AM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 11 - 12:35 AM
Little Hawk 02 Dec 11 - 12:15 AM
Amos 02 Dec 11 - 12:02 AM
gnu 01 Dec 11 - 11:40 PM
Amos 01 Dec 11 - 10:54 PM
Amos 01 Dec 11 - 05:07 PM
Rapparee 01 Dec 11 - 03:28 PM
gnu 01 Dec 11 - 03:09 PM
Little Hawk 01 Dec 11 - 01:17 PM
Amos 01 Dec 11 - 12:51 PM
Little Hawk 01 Dec 11 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 01 Dec 11 - 09:54 AM
Acme 01 Dec 11 - 09:42 AM
Amos 01 Dec 11 - 09:33 AM
Acme 01 Dec 11 - 01:00 AM
Amos 30 Nov 11 - 08:47 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 11 - 06:05 PM
Little Hawk 30 Nov 11 - 05:11 PM
gnu 30 Nov 11 - 04:46 PM
gnu 30 Nov 11 - 04:43 PM
Little Hawk 30 Nov 11 - 04:37 PM
Rapparee 30 Nov 11 - 02:53 PM
gnu 30 Nov 11 - 02:16 PM
Acme 30 Nov 11 - 01:00 PM
Amos 30 Nov 11 - 12:31 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 30 Nov 11 - 11:08 AM
Acme 30 Nov 11 - 11:00 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 01:29 PM

Oh, those. They're part of the improbable. If it's incomprehensible it's self-evidently true or false, because I can comprehend everything.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 01:15 PM

What about the implausible and the incomprehensible?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 01:08 PM

Amos, the improbable I can believe immediately; the impossible takes a little longer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 01:03 PM

Like my belief that 4 years of Chongo in the White House is all that's needed to "straighten out" the USA... ;-)

GfS - I can't remember what the heck happened, but I don't think I succeeded in opening them. What I'd like to do at some point is send you a copy of my CD.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 10:46 AM

To believe the improbable is a tough art indeed, Bookmanne, but therein lies genius and the changing of worlds.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 10:05 AM

I do not rule out any probability. I want reasonable certainty before stating it as true. What I personally believe is another matter entirely and not necessarily stated anywhere, for I can believe something is true but find it both improbable and uncertain: did I dream it or was it real? and is there a difference?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 04:00 AM

Little Hawk, have you tried opening the music files with any success, yet?

GfS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 03 Dec 11 - 01:46 AM

I agree with Little Hawk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 11:13 PM

Weelll, I just happen to be doing up a program for the Continuing Ed at the local University on "Printing and the Reformation." Seems like there was the "Silk Road" as early as 100 BCE, and it had a corresponding water route -- around India and Arabia, up the Red Sea to Alexandria and then out over the Med.

I can't speak for anybody else's ancestors, but mine weren't stupid. They could figger things out, like how to get from place to place. Shucks, any globe has lots of answers and when you couple that with the stuff in the sky...heck's fire, you can get 'most anywhere. Sailing? Hug the coastline and see where you end up. Peek at the globe from the North Pole down and note how the land lays, then consider how it would look if more water was locked up in ice.

The first people out don't have a map, they make them. Then the rest can follow.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 09:20 PM

I wasn't suggesting you worry about it, Rap. Worrying is a waste of mental energy.

But it's an interesting subject, eh?

The Chinese did indeed build VERY large ships in medieval (or post-medieval?) times, as Amos mentions, and it appears that they traveled as far as Africa, India and the western coasts of North America at one point, seeking trade in all probability. It seems that they did not attempt to colonize or settle those areas.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 08:34 PM

There are other reasons for sifting through bodies of data than whether or not you can do something about them.

Those mastodons had --as I recall--fresh daisies in their upper stomachs, meaning the air cover had been ripped off the planet in milliseconds, or some other flash-freeze event had occurred.

Gawd knows what it was.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 08:16 PM

I have no doubt at all that people other than Europeans visited the Americas prior to...what? After all, folks came here during the last Ice Age from somewhere. I see no objection to the theories that there was a land bridge from Asia, or that some crossed by land and water from Northern Europe. It is also obvious from recent archeological discoveries in South America that there was coastal "boating." As for our ancestors' abilities, the islands of Polynesia weren't settled by land bridges!

But to say, "The Chinese did this" or "Space aliens helped with that" -- well, I take a skeptic's "show me" attitude.

Did the poles shift in the past? Certainly. Will they shift again? Most likely. Can I or anyone else do anything about it? No. If mankind becomes extinct, will the planet go on? Yes. Ergo, I can't be worried about polar shift, the Mayan calendar, the Yellowstone caldera, asteroid hits, and things like those. I'll worry about things I can do something about.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 06:51 PM

Perhaps they were slow chewers. One scenario among many.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 06:28 PM

Fascinating stuff, Amos!

I will further add to it that all those areas were likely discovered and mapped in a much earlier time, perhaps as long as 15,000 or 20,000 years ago, by an advanced civilization whose remnants can still be seen in Egypt, South America, and Central America.

That civilization was probably destroyed by a planetary cataclysm around 15,000 years ago which caused immense inundations, and it may have resulted from a shift of the planet's crust over the molten core due to a shift in the Earth's axis at that time.

Look up some stuff on the Piri Reis map that shows a projection of Africa, South America, and the Antarctic continent which was apparently free of its present ice cap at the time...due to the fact that that continent was positioned farther north at the time and had a temperate climate.

Everything on this planet was discovered, in my opinion, long before our historical civilizations of the past 4000-6000 years. Columbus and the Chinese and various others were re-discovering what had been lost and forgotten after the last major planetary change.

And we may be headed for another one of a similar sort...an axis shift which moves the poles to radically new positions. But I have no way of being sure about that. Matter of fact, I hope it doesn't happen! Most of us probably won't survive it if it does.

Again...that would depend on how fast it were to happen.

Remember the mastodons which were have been found in Russian permafrost, apparently quick-frozen in some ancient time while standing there and chewing food in their mouths? That suggests a very sudden ocurrence.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 06:24 PM

Hey, Little Hawk(yo-ho)....I was thinkin'......the music files I sent you, should be able to be opened with 'Windows Media'...if not, you might ask someone to try to help you open them.
the reason i mentioned it is because, someone was listening to some of them today, and wondered if anyone 'online' had heard them. I said, "Well, I sent them to a singer/songwriter, named Little Hawk, but he said he couldn't open them". He suggested different ideas..but thought you might try different programs to open them...or use the 'Browse Window' and pick one of those...starting with to first one.
Get back to me. They were in my 'Windows Media'. and plays from there.
If not, I've got another idea.....

GfS


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Eiseley
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 05:32 PM

Very nice poem, Amos!
I'm glad to sail in this wayfaring ship.

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 04:47 PM

Indeed, Rap. But, surely you can't cite the Brits for rewriting history...with sword AND with pen. Ya gotta admit, the Brits know how to kick ass and have a penchant for prose. Apparently, a good combination since 1066... for them, anyway. >;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 04:43 PM

Oh, thou jade.

I would like to see a clear dissection of his description of the pre-Columbian map details which support much of his argument.

I love the picture he paints of the gigantic junks--which are an established fact in the Western Ocean if not the west of Africa and the Atlantic--carrying hundreds of men each.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 04:23 PM

Been there, read that, thought it was dross for quite a few reasons.

I do agree that our history is too, too Euro-centric and even then is mainly Anglo-centric. Little mention is ever made, for example, of New Sweden or the Russians in California. And certain it is that the oldest European settlements were in the American Southwest, not in the New England/Southern States area. Moreover, it's too Puritan-centric, largely ignoring the settlements in Maine and Virginia to describe the suffering of Plimoth Plantation in 1620 -- and the help that both could provide. Of course, history (as we all know) is written by the winners or those with the biggest mouths.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 02:58 PM

Spars for porcine containment?? How tellingly un-nautical.

By the way, you might enjoy a really well done book called "1421: The Year China Discovered the World" which documents very carefully the exploration of the planet, including Arctic regions and the coasts of North America, by bold Chinese admirals with fleets of gigantic junks under their command. It blows holes all through the grade-school mythology of the Age of Exploration by Europeans.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 09:29 AM

Or, if a couple of crew member kept swine the huge spars, "Higgin! Kiggin! Get riggin' the friggin' bigg'un piggin' riggin'!"?

Could he say that after the rum ration?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 12:58 AM

Yes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 12:44 AM

So if he were in the Navy he'd say, "Climb the friggin' riggin'!"?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 12:35 AM

Chongo, by the way, would probably use the expression "fuckin' A", if he wasn't fixated on the Bogart/Philip Marlowe ethos and time period, as presented in films and novels. He thinks the F-word is too impolite, so he doesn't use it. He tends to say "friggin" instead.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 12:15 AM

Bravely said, good sir! I couldn't agree more.

And that poem you wrote was stout stuff too. Stirs the blood, it does. Forward, I say! On through the crashing waves, and damn the torpedoes!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 02 Dec 11 - 12:02 AM

FUcking A!!! has always been an expression of strenuous agreement or accolade in my vocabulary, Good Gnus. But people of lesser learning or later exposure are far too willing to abandon their history and plead ignorance as a rampant, hollow justification for sheer laziness of mind. Sad, it is, but true. We live in an age of decline and degradation, where human dignity and learning are trivialized and the meaning of honorable terms like "Fucking A!" is left in the sad wake of declining history...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 11:40 PM

That's fuckin A, A.

Minds me... I once said that to Max in PM and he thought I was calling him a fucking asshole.

Is it not common in your united states to compliment one by saying... fuckin A! as in fuckin A number ONE? Or is it just not recognized as a term of enndearment and accolade in some states?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 10:54 PM

When the night watch died and the dawn watch tide
Rolled high on the starboard bow
And the rigging spliced to the sails with ice
And the wind began to howl
We chipped and hauled with the rigger's maul
And we forced the main to reef,
ANd the good ship held to the course like Death,
With a hell-white bone in her teeth.

On the long sea road, with a BS load
Such merry souls were we,
As the main yards groaned midst the holy stones,
On the way to Forty-Three!


As the dawn came light and we fled the night
Then the ice began to thaw,
And we knew we were past the reach of death,
And beyond all human Law
And we had only Mom to answer to
As four bells began to chime,
When a cable off of the starboard bow
Passed the Forty-Two and Nine.

On the long sea road, with a BS load
Such merry souls were we,
As the main yards groaned midst the holy stones,
On the way to Forty-Three!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 05:07 PM

And some day, I am sure you will...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 03:28 PM

See? It's all so simple when you understand what's going on.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 03:09 PM

Not Newfoundland, Rap... the Bay of Fundy. The guns are placed in sealed containers with floats attached. At high tide during dark hours, the containers are dumped overboard by fishing boats who have collected them at the drop off point by aircraft or by pleasure vessel. Before they are dumped by the fishing boats, some floats are removed and an anchor attached by means of a rope of such a length that will conceal the containers well below the water surface.

As you are ALL aware, the Bay of Fundy tides are the highest in the world. At low tide, again during dark hours, jet boats are able to pick up the guns which now float about 1.5m below the surface and ferry them up rivers into the deepest and darkest parts of the forbidding lands known as Albert County, New Brunswick. They are then taken by ATV or snowmobile to lumber roads where they are picked up by white 3/4 ton 4X4 Dodge Maxivans driven by The Warriors from the Mi'kmaq who then drive the backwoods roads into the US.

They are then transferred, along with lobster, moose, hemp (hey, these guys don't fuck around... a convoy can easily be 40 vans), and whatever, to the New England Mi'kmaq for distribution to the point of sale. Such distriution may include other First Nations Warriors and extend to all of the contiguous US states... except for guns in Idaho because there so many guns there all ready they can't get a good price.

Hey... Rap... you shoulda sent my coin by Warrier express.

All of the above is purely fiction, of course. The tale of an idle mindless. I really don't know what those convoys with armed men dressed in black carry. Maybe they are taking the wives and kids to Disneyland?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 01:17 PM

Do you realize we just reached 42,900, Amos? Or rather...YOU did.

I didn't feel the Earth move or anything.

Regarding what would happen if Chongo met Mark Twain...I think that after an initial period of surprise (at least on Twain's part) and mutual suspicion, they would probably have sat down amicably together, had a couple of drinks, and whiled away an hour or two discussing the difficulties and amusements of life faced by literary iconoclasts and self-employed chimps in a changing America.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 12:51 PM

If Chongo ever met Twain, perish the thought, he'd probably want to rub him out for some typically neurotic simian reason. Some primates are not to be trusted even in imaginary circumstances!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 11:04 AM

You and Chongo have sooooo much in common, Rap! It's a wonder you don't get along better.

Not like Amos. He and Chongo have very little in common. They are at opposite ends of the paradym. Never the twain shall meet.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 09:54 AM

Okay, I'll explain it.

Back in March or April gnu and I made a deal to "import" guns from Canada. He can get them pretty simply, because he lives near a beach where they can be landed in quantity on the bleak coasts of Newfoundland by Certain Parties From Elsewhere. Good stuff, too: HK-7s, Kriss Vectors, FNs, things like that. So the shipments came across Canada and down through the mountains near Boundary County, Idaho (no, I'm not going to tell you where!). They got to me and I put paid to the delivery folks. I sold the stuff to the DHS, the FBI, and the RCMP,all of which needed them but couldn't get them by going through "regular channels."

Anyway, I sent him his share of the loot profits and he's claiming that he was overpaid and owes me some money, so I sent him some. The first time it was returned because the Canadian "mules" were all on strike. After that got sorted out I sent it again, but the courier didn't make the drop (that's being taken care of, with extreme prejudice). So I sent it a third time.

It's really simple when you understand what's going on. Naturally, I haven't mentioned the cut-outs, such as Eiseley.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 09:42 AM

Money (has one converted it to the other's currency?) and a book. I've been mailing eBay packages all over the world for a number of years and usually find a reasonably priced way to ship, so I wonder at the packaging or size of the tome in question.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 09:33 AM

WEll, at least part of it seems to be money.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 01 Dec 11 - 01:00 AM

I still haven't figured out what these two are trying to mail back and forth, and I refuse to read through the last 16 pages of 50 posts at a time to find it.

And I hoped someone other that LH might notice my remark about his obituary. Future, of course, but it pertains to today. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 08:47 PM

Hell, I could have mailed it from inside Canada when I was there last summer and saved you all this grumbling!! No, it was the summer before that, but still...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 06:05 PM

Priority international delivery, good sir. This damned time I want it to be delivered. As for the other -- consider it an investment in your liver. Use it according to the directions on the card.

When I found out that the second delivery had disappeared I might possibly perhaps have become somewhat slightly pissed off at the US and/or Canadian postal services. If that did happen I take the best way I can think of (short of delivering it myself, and who the heck wants to visit New Brunswick?) to solve the problem.

This is a holdover from my working days, when I would use my old buddy Bill Occam's razor to cut through crap.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 05:11 PM

The trouble is, they tend to respond with a SWAT team when you do that. Rapparee would get in deep shit if he killed an entire SWAT team.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 04:46 PM

And, what is that undeliverable shit? Why didn't you give them shit about that. Next time you have to deal with those assholes, wear yer sidearmsss eh.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 04:43 PM

"USD 50.00 + 26.95 priority postage + cost of card." What? wht $50?? and why $26.95 for PP? You is gettin ripped!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 04:37 PM

Stilly - Yeah. Tragic, ain't it? Why, I could've had a career in music comparable to John Prine or Mary Chapin Carpenter by now, if it weren't for the danged Mudcat addiction devouring my temporal resources! ;-D


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 02:53 PM

First mailing, returned as undeliverable: USD 30.00 + postage (only out postage)
Second mailing, lost in space: USD 30.00 + postage.
Third mailing, on the way: USD 50.00 + 26.95 priority postage + cost of card.

So I'm out 76.95 + cost of card.

I'll send the rest shortly.

Ain't never been no deadbeat nothin'...just slow on the uptake and in understanding what the heck is going on around me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 02:16 PM

Well, Rap, the book cost me $46 to start with and I gave you a $46 discount on the book. At this very moment, I am out $76. The book retails for over $100 if you buy them one at a time.

As for 3 to 5 business days... you BELIEVE the post office?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 01:00 PM

In his obituary, when the time comes, it will be revealed that Little Hawk spent a total of 504 hours (a full three weeks) of his life simply logging on and off of Mudcat to change his various identities.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 12:31 PM

He's not into teaching, so much--more of a service-oriented production unit, him.

The day Chongo acknowledges his buried latent tendencies and comes out of the closet I will eat this post--digitally, of course. Chongo is a being of dream-stuff, of course, but his "reality" is entirely digital, depending on these ASCII characters and their binary equivalents, and their transfer from UART to VRAM and monitor, to exist at all. As such he is partial to digital manipulation, preferably auto-stimulation with his own digits.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 11:08 AM

Don't try to teach yer coon hound how to lick its balls, Rap.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 30 Nov 11 - 11:00 AM

Cute phone, Rap, but the camera is only 2.1 megapixel.

Remember when we only had to choose whether our phones had a dial or push buttons?


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