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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

MMario 09 Nov 05 - 12:20 PM
GUEST 09 Nov 05 - 12:12 PM
Little Hawk 09 Nov 05 - 12:10 PM
GUEST,Lobelia in Lousiana 09 Nov 05 - 12:06 PM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 12:05 PM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 12:04 PM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 12:02 PM
Skipjack K8 09 Nov 05 - 12:02 PM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 12:02 PM
GUEST,William Shatner 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM
GUEST,William Shatner 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 12:00 PM
GUEST,Nerf 09 Nov 05 - 12:00 PM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 11:57 AM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 11:57 AM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 11:55 AM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 11:54 AM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 11:53 AM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 11:52 AM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 11:49 AM
Acme 09 Nov 05 - 11:44 AM
Little Hawk 09 Nov 05 - 11:38 AM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 11:33 AM
Amos 09 Nov 05 - 11:23 AM
Little Hawk 09 Nov 05 - 11:10 AM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 11:06 AM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 11:05 AM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 11:04 AM
Rapparee 09 Nov 05 - 09:48 AM
Amos 09 Nov 05 - 09:32 AM
MMario 09 Nov 05 - 09:23 AM
JennyO 09 Nov 05 - 09:21 AM
Bunnahabhain 09 Nov 05 - 08:00 AM
JennyO 09 Nov 05 - 07:20 AM
Little Hawk 08 Nov 05 - 11:18 PM
Acme 08 Nov 05 - 11:09 PM
Acme 08 Nov 05 - 10:41 PM
Bunnahabhain 08 Nov 05 - 08:37 PM
Bunnahabhain 08 Nov 05 - 05:48 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 04:40 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 03:29 PM
Acme 08 Nov 05 - 03:21 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 01:32 PM
catspaw49 08 Nov 05 - 01:29 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 01:07 PM
GUEST,Ralphs 08 Nov 05 - 12:07 PM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 10:56 AM
MMario 08 Nov 05 - 10:54 AM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:20 PM

heck no! If you had read the thread you would realize that sh*t floats and always comes to the top.

MOAB is a constant of the universe - like gravity, conservation of mass; and gas after eating cabbage.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:12 PM

Not finished yet?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:10 PM

AWright!!! Bill came through! I knew I could count on him. This thread has finally reached its peak moment, and can now move gracefully into its dotage, having achieved all that BS can possibly achieve. Sheesh. I got so excited that I almost had a coronary. I gotta go and lie down or something.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Lobelia in Lousiana
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:06 PM

Stilly, you just got "sandwiched" by William Shatner, you lucky girl!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:05 PM

once again - our stratagy worked! the Big BS is now stuck with the ultimate in unfortunate posts, # 10,000! why shortly he will find himself a no-talent, ageing, out of work, bumbling, stuttering,incompetent.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:04 PM

For once I am relieved to see Shatner turn up. Better than one of these other poachers trying for that brass ring!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:02 PM

ssssshoot


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Skipjack K8
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:02 PM

I have just read this thread from the beginning, and thought it was time to enter the fray on a round number


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:02 PM

I was wondering what you might be refering to!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,William Shatner
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM

And I love it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM

When launching these posts


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,William Shatner
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM

Well, well, well. Still at it, eh? And people say that I don't know when to quit! You know, my friends, sheer tenacity can be a real virtue...when it is applied to what could be termed...a useful project. A good idea. A gift to the world. That sort of thing.

This thread...(cough, cough)...does not qualify as any of those. Nope. Sorry. In the race of life this thread staggers in desperately near to the end of the pack, alongside a lame turtle and a guy in a wheelchair who is trying to get his picture on the cover of "People Magazine". Not that I'm against such things. No indeed. I will always give moral support to those who struggle to overcome innate disadvantages such as a disability, a lack of education, or plain old sheer stupidity. Such people also stand and serve. They may not serve terribly well...but they serve.

Which reminds me, my daughter won the tennis meet in Huntsville, Alabama last Saturday. She can really serve. There are good genes in that girl, let me tell you. You can see her on my website. Just look it up.

Anyway, I was sort of hoping that a little word or two from me would be enough to convince all you folks of the futility of pushing this whole Mother of All BS nonsense any further...but I'm not going to bet the farm on it. Oh...no...I'm not that foolish. I wasn't born last Wednesday.

I figure that you will pay no attention to my good advice, and you will persist in this...exercise...in complete asininity. "Asininity". Now there's a word for you. I like the ring of that. I'm going to have to see if they can work it into an episode of "Boston Legal". That's my new show, as you of course must know. Be sure to watch it. It's great.

So, here's a smile and a wink from your Captain, the guy who steps down every now and then from his busy life to give you a little encouragement and advice along the way...the guy who isn't too proud to get down and chew the fat with the locals...the guy who is proud to be both Canadian AND a resident of the USA...your pal...your guiding light on the path of life.

Think large, breathe deep, and have a coke on me. You people are great. I love you. And I say that from the bottom of my heart...if not my pocketbook. The tear in my eye is not a fake one. Oh no, not me. I live the parts I play.

- William Shatner


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:01 PM

DSL helps


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:00 PM

Here's another good one, Coleridge, really rolls off the ol' tongue
(from here)

Kubla Khan

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure-dome decree:
Where Alph, the sacred river, ran
Through caverns measureless to man
Down to a sunless sea.

So twice five miles of fertile ground
With walls and towers were girdled round:
And there were gardens bright with sinuous rills,
Where blossomed many an incense-bearing tree;
And here were forests ancient as the hills,
Enfolding sunny spots of greenery.

But oh! that deep romantic chasm which slanted
Down the green hill athwart a cedarn cover!
A savage place! as holy and enchanted
As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted
By woman wailing for her demon-lover!
And from this chasm, with ceaseless turmoil seething,
As if this earth in fast thick pants were breathing,
A mighty fountain momently was forced:
Amid whose swift half-intermitted burst
Huge fragments vaulted like rebounding hail,
Or chaffy grain beneath the thresher's flail:
And 'mid these dancing rocks at once and ever
It flung up momently the sacred river.
Five miles meandering with a mazy motion
Through wood and dale the sacred river ran,
Then reached the caverns measureless to man,
And sank in tumult to a lifeless ocean:
And 'mid this tumult Kubla heard from far
Ancestral voices prophesying war!

The shadow of the dome of pleasure
Floated midway on the waves;
Where was heard the mingled measure
From the fountain and the caves.
It was a miracle of rare device,
A sunny pleasure-dome with caves of ice!

A damsel with a dulcimer
In a vision once I saw:
It was an Abyssinian maid,
And on her dulcimer she played,
Singing of Mount Abora.
Could I revive within me
Her symphony and song,
To such a deep delight 'twould win me
That with music loud and long
I would build that dome in air,
That sunny dome! those caves of ice!
And all who heard should see them there,
And all should cry, Beware! Beware!
His flashing eyes, his floating hair!
Weave a circle round him thrice,
And close your eyes with holy dread,
For he on honey-dew hath fed
And drunk the milk of Paradise.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Nerf
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 12:00 PM

Why?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:57 AM

Keep yer chin up, Mom!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:57 AM

Keep it up, MMario! (so to speak)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:55 AM

Like folks at the

Marshall Public Library in Pocatello Idaho


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:54 AM

or is he meaner then a junkyard dog? Junkyard does is MEAN- I mean, they have to be, to keep up with the rats and all.

twelve


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:53 AM

I hope some of the rest of you are paying attention. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:52 AM

Since such a momentus number is coming up, and since I typically post poetry around these times when there is more of a captivated audience, I will post one of my favorites. It's good, and it's important.

Mending Wall
Robert Frost

Something there is that doesn't love a wall,
That sends the frozen-ground-swell under it
And spills the upper boulder in the sun,
And make gaps even two can pass abreast.
The work of hunters is another thing:
I have come after them and made repair
Where they have left not one stone on a stone,
But they would have the rabbit out of hiding,
To please the yelping dogs. The gaps I mean,
No one has seen them made or heard them made,
But at spring mending-time we find them there,
I let my neighbor know beyond the hill;
And on a day we meet to walk the line
And set the wall between us once again.
We keep the wall between us as we go.
To each the boulders that have fallen to each.
And some are loaves and some so nearly balls
We have to use a spell to make them balance:
"Stay where you are until our backs are turned!"
We wear our fingers rough with handling them.
Oh, just another kind of outdoor game,
One on a side. It comes to little more:
There were it is we do not need the wall:
He is all pine and I am apple orchard.
My apple trees will never get across
And eat the cones under his pines, I tell him.
He only says, "Good fences make good neighbors."
Spring is the mischief in me, and I wonder
If I could put a notion in his head:
"Why do they make good neighbors? Isn't it
Where there are cows? But here there are no cows.
Before I built a wall I'd ask to know
What I was walling in or walling out,
And to whom I was like to give offense.
Something there is that doesn't love a wall,
That wants it down." I could say "Elves" to him,
But it's not elves exactly, and I'd rather
He said it for himself. I see him there,
Bringing a stone grasped firmly by the top
In each hand, like an old-stone savage armed.
He moves in darkness as it seems to me,
Not of woods only and the shade of trees.
He will not go behind his father's saying,
And he likes having though of it so well
He says again, "Good fences make good neighbors."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:49 AM

Hmm. That last post vanished, in which I told Leo that there are no starkers men around here to gaze at. That I know of. Any volunteers?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:44 AM

I haven't tripped on a shaver wire (cord?) for a long time, but I do sometimes step on the string that dangles from the back of my ironing board cover. When the board is folded the string trails on the floor.

You'd be really bad, Leroy, if you carried an ironing board in your shoe instead of a razor. Same general shape, just much larger. I suppose you could wear one in each shoe to balance yourself out.

Ooops. Pardon me while I go get a cloth to dry the spit off of my screen. This is just too funny to visualize. You could play a sasquatch on the side, with shoes this size. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:38 AM

Ask Chongo about that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:33 AM

so Raparee - is you meaner then Ol' King Kong?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:23 AM

I have always respected you, Goode Rapaire; I just chide you once in a while when you Cop Attitude. I don't think I could respect someone who Aspired to Badenesse, though. I t seems very counter-productive. Is it possible you were being given a Bumme Steere?

I am partial to T-bone, myself.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:10 AM

Thanks for all the great Tiddlywinks information! I can only imagine what sort of cool people spend their time doing that. Wow, eh? What a great game.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:06 AM

dix-huit


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:05 AM

19


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 11:04 AM

Is it legal to marry blue and white wires to green wires in California? Wasn't there a resolution passed on that or some such thing? Or was that a resolution to define marriage as the joining of wires of different gauges? I get confused.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 09:48 AM

Awright, I'm back. And I don't wanna hear one stinkin' word from any of you punks, ya hear? I go off and keep the promises I made months ago, and when I come back I find that I'm pretty much forgotten.

Well, it ain't gonna be that way no more. I'm gonna stomp around the house, I'm gonna sock any chowederbrain who don't like it, ya hear me? You punks wanna stay healthy you don't even THINK about lookin' at me funny, ya unnerstan?

Cuz I'm gonna change my name. Yeah. No more Mr. Nice Rapaire, no more Mr. Goody Twoshoes Rapaire. I'm changin' my name to Leroy Brown. So suck it up, punkos. Deal with it.






And perhaps then I'll obtain the respect I most certainly deserve. For who, other than myself, has been so compromising, so civil, so peaceloving, so considerate, so caring, so conscientious?    Mother, of course, suggested the name change and the reasons for it. She told me, "Son, unless you carry a thirty-two gun your pocket for fun and a razor in your shoe, Amos won't respect you one bit. Bunny will continue to laugh at you behind your back, and that hot Texas tomato will chortle in her chili when your name is mentioned. Which, I hasten to add, it never is. So you have to be metamorphized into the baddest man in the whole damn town. Now you toddle off to bed, and don't forget to say your nighty-nighty prayers."

"But Mom!" I said, "carrying a razor in my shoe seems not just uncomfortable, but unsafe. I could cut off one or more of my little piggies!"

And she replied, "Well, you just take care when you do it. And if some of your little piggies are sliced off we'll have them sewn back on. Now put on your Care Bears pajamas, brush your teethies, say your prayers, and climb into the world of sweet dreams."

And so I have done just as Mother suggested. I have thirty-two guns in my pocket for fun, and it's quite a burden. My pants fall down, for one thing. And the cord from the razor keeps getting all tangled up in bushes and things and sometimes I even step on it and trip myself.

But as soon as I change my name to Leroy Brown I'll be the Baddest Man in the Whole Damn Town. First though I suppose I have to determine whether or not there is an "E" on the end of Brown. And whether or not "Leroy" is "Lee Roy" "LeRoy" "Le Roy" or some other variant.

Your assistance would be appreciated.

Thank you for helping me to become the Baddest Man in the Whole Damn Town.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 09:32 AM

I am weary to me bones, I am; I spent the whole evening rerouting a phone cable that had once been hidden beneath a carpet, and now had to run overhead behind a beam and down the opposite wall, because of the new flooring. But by Yiminy, when the geen-with-white stripes wire was finally married to the blue wire, the damn phone worked just as it shoulda. A small but distinct triumph.

In other news, the MOAB trundles, lurches, staggers, and drags her way to Mudcat history, a Granfaloon to Top All Granfaloons.

A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 09:23 AM

We used to enjoy a few rounds of rutabaga bowling in the afternoon when Her Majesty was visiting Warwick, but lately the crowds haven't allowed the room for a proper game of bowls.

Before they put the stairs in between the Upper and Lower Shire Cabbage Bowls was popular.

Stilly - rumour hath it that when you talk about gazing at Mars through the binoculars you are using an acronym** - is it true?

but back to the games - Rutabaga bowling of course uses butternut squash for pins, and by preference White rutabagas, though usually only the (inferior) yellow variety is available. Players claim the white roll more evenly and that the yellow fleshed varieties are more uneven. S'truth!







** Mars = Man Across Road, Starkers


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 09:21 AM

This is a game with a bit of an Aussie flavour - well, we are a weird mob!

WOMBAT TABLE TENNIS

Wombat table tennis is very similar to traditional table tennis with one major exception. A small wombat is used instead of a ball.

THE TABLE
The table is rectangular, 9 foot in length by 5 ft in width. It is made of any material that will give a uniform bounce of not less than 8 3/4 inches and not more than 9 3/4 inches when a regulation wombat is dropped from a height of one foot above the surface. The playing surface shall be preferably dark green, and matt, with a white line 3/4 inch wide along each edge.

The playing surface is divided into two courts of equal size by a vertical net running parallel to the end lines. The net is 6 feet long and its top along the whole length is 6 inches above the playing surface. Another net being 6 inches high covers the perimeter of the table. This net is to keep the wombat from running off the table during a game.

THE RACKET
The racket may be of any size, shape or weight.

THE WOMBAT
A wombat is a marsupial found in Australia. Young common wombats are used only. Use of the endangered Northern Hairy-nosed Wombat of Queensland for table tennis is strictly forbidden.

SERVING THE WOMBAT
At the start of the serve, the player shall insert his hand into the wombat's pouch above the level of the playing surface, and behind the server's end line.

The wombat and the racquet shall be above the level of the playing surface and behind the end line of the server's court or an imaginary extension thereof from the last moment at which the wombat is stationary on the palm of the free hand until the wombat is struck in service.

The server shall then project the wombat near vertically upwards pulling his hand out of the pouch without imparting spin, so that it rises at least 6 inches after leaving the palm of the hand.

As the wombat is then descending from the height of its trajectory, the server shall strike it so that it touches first his own court and passes directly over the net or around or under the projection of the net and its supports outside the table, touches the receiver's court.

If, in attempting to serve, a player fails to strike the wombat while it is in play, he shall lose a point.

POINTS
Points are awarded the same as in regular table tennis with the following exceptions:
A player shall lose a point if :
He obstructs the wombat.
If the wombat urinates on his court.
He strikes the wombat twice successively.
The wombat runs off the player's court.
The wombat bites the player.
The server has unnatural acts with the wombat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 08:00 AM

Well, if we're on silly games, lets have this one.

Cheese Rolling!



Around May day , the people of Coopers Hill, Gloucestershire and many, many outsiders gather to compete in the annual Cheese Chase.
A number of men gather at the top the hill, and a 7lb wheel of double gloucster cheese is bowled down the hill. The men give chase, and the first one to catch the cheese, or cross the finishing line keeps it. The young farmers association, and rugby teams are firm favourites for this.

There is a seperate competition for women, as they're not stupid enough to join in the mens one...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: JennyO
Date: 09 Nov 05 - 07:20 AM

Dunno, but there are 24 winks in a Tiddlywinks set. It's a whole new language!

The squop is the most important shot in the winker's repertoire, involving the placement of the played wink on top of another wink - thus stopping the covered wink from being played, and stopping it from contributing to the score of its owning player. A squop is typically played with the squidger tilted towards the direction of travel of the played wink. Where possible, most people find it easier to squop towards themselves, moving the squidger off the end of the wink most distant from themselves. Many players use a squopping motion, playing away from themselves, to bring winks into the game from the baseline. Squopping sends a wink in quite a low trajectory.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 11:18 PM

How many tiddlies does it take to make a bushel?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 11:09 PM

Mom creeps along through the night, heavy with her burden of posts (so many that she's barely distraught at the scrambled nature of many from early this year--they're all here, that's what matters). I'm going to step out on the porch and gaze at Mars through the binoculars then head for bed. I'll check on you bright and early!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:41 PM

Yeah, well at least a few malcontents have been evicted without the help of any clones. Irreverence has its uses!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 08:37 PM

In the beginning Max created the Music and the BS.

And The BS was without form, and Void: and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And Max moved upon the face of the BS.

And Max said, Let there be posts, and there was posts.

And Joe saw the posts, that they were good.

You can see where this is going...


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 05:48 PM

We aren't going to go through Mom's entire history, are we?

Some talk of Alexander, and some of Hercules
Of Hector and Lysander, and such great names as these.
But of all the world's great heroes, there's none that can compare
With a tow, row, row, row, row, row, to MOABs peole here.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 04:40 PM

Well Mom, I must leave you for today - but I'll try to pop in if I can get on the computer later this evening - I need to do that if possible as I've got a buncha tunes to transcribe and post. but I also have a Christmas stocking to finish for my 2nd Great-niece - whose arrival date is Dec 25.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 03:29 PM

y'know - I miss the recounts of the NYCFTTS, cletus and Pa, and those Reg boys.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 03:21 PM

In honor of 'spaw's visit, a pome (and a sublime little pun).

ODE TO A ROAD APPLE
                            by Thea Gavin

                Here, without using chemicals,
                I play the hand that nature deals-
                my garden's where an earthworm feels secure.
                Sky high corn, and these tomatoes
                dwarf their tough-skinned tasteless kin, those
                pathetic mutants at the grocery store.

                If I shared my little secret
                it might spoil your will to eat, yet
                also give you food for thought if you're unsure.
                I use fertilizer so fine
                from the south end of my equine
                friends in-stalled outside the city: horse manure.

                Gardener's gold, I load and pile it
                mix it, turn it, wait and while it
                cooks I test it every smelly couple days:
                plunge my hand into the steaming
                reeking middle, what's it needing...
                air? or water? "One more week," the odor says.

                Manue compost on the side as
                a snug blanket, makes like midas:
                everything it touches turns to veggie gold.
                Green bean vines devour their trellis,
                rabid zucchini overwhelm us -
                that stuff seems to make them giddy and quite bold.

                So try this healthy spinach sample
                courtesy of horses' ample
                capacity for pelletizing hay.
                And if it messes up your thinking
                to be eating what was stinking
                manure, think how you might recycle too some day.


                                            Thea Gavin
                                            11/27/00


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 01:32 PM

'spaw - you do realize just who was the inspiration for this entire thread don't you?

no - it wasn't Shatner.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: catspaw49
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 01:29 PM

From it's inception until now, I would like to congratulate the cast of characters who have toiled along in total silliness to make this indeed the MOABS. Many folks have contributed but there are those few which I and others will always pay tribute to as the main provacateurs of this heap of festering drivel and nonsense which deserve credit for not only their contribution to the power of nothingness (for which I am sure they will receive The Hemingway Award) but also as the living proof and testament to the now apparent fact that one can live, breathe, and yet have no life at all.

I send along as well a 120 pound container of pressurized possum farts which Cleigh has collected to honor the occasion of this thread crossing the line into true immortality. Please release them at the height of the celebration (Keep Away from Open Flame).

Good on ya', good up ya', and good in ya' depending upon any personal philosophies.

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 01:07 PM

Do Vogons vogue? Or are they vague?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Ralphs
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 12:07 PM

Har!


We have shown your poems to our friends, the Vogons, and they/she/it like them very much indeed. They are on their way to tell you themselves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:56 AM

The ponderous beast went down
With a crack of a broken shaft.
And the night drew through the trees
In one long invidious draft.

The most unquestioning pair
That ever accepted fate
And the least disposed to ascribe
Any more than we had to hate,


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 08 Nov 05 - 10:54 AM

With a lantern that wouldn't burn
In too frail a buggy we drove
Behind too heavy a horse
Through a pitch-dark limitless grove.

And a man came out of the trees
And took our horse by the head
And reaching back to his ribs
Deliberately stabbed him dead.


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