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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 01 Feb 16 - 08:49 PM
Little Hawk 01 Feb 16 - 10:13 AM
Rapparee 01 Feb 16 - 10:05 AM
Amos 01 Feb 16 - 12:37 AM
Little Hawk 31 Jan 16 - 10:15 PM
Rapparee 31 Jan 16 - 09:53 PM
Little Hawk 31 Jan 16 - 09:18 PM
Rapparee 31 Jan 16 - 06:22 PM
Little Hawk 31 Jan 16 - 11:43 AM
Acme 31 Jan 16 - 11:27 AM
Rapparee 30 Jan 16 - 10:50 PM
Little Hawk 30 Jan 16 - 02:16 AM
Amos 30 Jan 16 - 01:02 AM
GUEST 29 Jan 16 - 11:31 PM
Acme 29 Jan 16 - 10:51 PM
GUEST,heedlessness 29 Jan 16 - 06:48 PM
gnu 29 Jan 16 - 06:44 PM
Rapparee 29 Jan 16 - 04:10 PM
gnu 29 Jan 16 - 03:40 PM
Little Hawk 29 Jan 16 - 12:17 PM
Rapparee 29 Jan 16 - 09:53 AM
gnu 29 Jan 16 - 07:00 AM
Little Hawk 29 Jan 16 - 12:31 AM
Rapparee 28 Jan 16 - 08:43 PM
gnu 28 Jan 16 - 06:36 PM
Amos 28 Jan 16 - 05:32 PM
Rapparee 28 Jan 16 - 03:17 PM
Little Hawk 28 Jan 16 - 12:14 PM
Amos 28 Jan 16 - 11:27 AM
Rapparee 28 Jan 16 - 09:53 AM
Little Hawk 28 Jan 16 - 01:03 AM
Rapparee 27 Jan 16 - 10:30 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 16 - 09:18 PM
Acme 27 Jan 16 - 08:55 PM
Rapparee 27 Jan 16 - 07:24 PM
Little Hawk 27 Jan 16 - 12:56 PM
Rapparee 27 Jan 16 - 10:00 AM
Amos 27 Jan 16 - 01:20 AM
gnu 26 Jan 16 - 07:51 PM
Rapparee 26 Jan 16 - 07:33 PM
Amos 26 Jan 16 - 07:23 PM
gnu 26 Jan 16 - 04:52 PM
Rapparee 26 Jan 16 - 04:33 PM
gnu 26 Jan 16 - 01:27 PM
Little Hawk 26 Jan 16 - 12:18 PM
Amos 26 Jan 16 - 10:56 AM
Rapparee 26 Jan 16 - 09:44 AM
Rapparee 26 Jan 16 - 09:30 AM
gnu 26 Jan 16 - 07:15 AM
Rapparee 25 Jan 16 - 09:56 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Feb 16 - 08:49 PM

With 10% of the precincts reporting in, Hilary leads Bernie:

Hillary
CLINTON
81        52.6%
        
Bernie
SANDERS
71        46.1%

Is this a reflection of the future?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Feb 16 - 10:13 AM

I had a great many books here, but I have been thinning them out in recent years, taking the ones I didn't think I'd read again to trade in at the used book store. I now probably have 1/5 as many books as I used to.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Feb 16 - 10:05 AM

I'm afraid that my own library, from which I usually post, most often looks like this. I am trying to get a handle on my 1,938 (at last count, and incomplete at that) books. (My catalog is online; be nice and I'll share the URL.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 01 Feb 16 - 12:37 AM

One gem of library Truth can be found in the movie "The Paper Chase", available on Netflix. Recommended for its sense of balance between the world of significance and the world of substance. Our culture, as we know so well, tends to divorce these two fields from each other, leading to lives rich in artifice and pretense.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Jan 16 - 10:15 PM

Beautiful.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jan 16 - 09:53 PM

A real library! Another. And yet another.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Jan 16 - 09:18 PM

Hear! Hear! You almost bring tears to my eyes, good sir!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 31 Jan 16 - 06:22 PM

How well I remember the library patrons! Elderly gentlefolk ensconced at the walnut tables, their pens scratching busily as they made notes, the green-glass shades of the brass lamps soothing the light that escaped as the Pages, with silent tread, brought a requested book -- so eagerly sought! -- to a patron.

The quiet! Ah, the quiet in which one could think! But the silence seemed to resonate with the thoughts of those availing themselves of the priceless knowledge so carefully collected over, perhaps, centuries by a line of librarians stretching back into the darkness of Time!

Librarians! Those dauntless priests and priestesses of knowledge! They who ultimately save the World from Chaos and total darkness! Unthanked, they continue their ages-old task of preserving Knowledge and, ultimately, bringing it to a new mind which, awakened to the possibilities inherent in it, dances with delight and shouts for joy within itself!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Jan 16 - 11:43 AM

Alas! The classically silent library of yore has been swept away by a hideous tide of noisy consumer clone Kens and Barbies clutching iPhones, taking "selfies", inserting the word "like" at least 3 times into every sentence they speak, and gazing into handheld video screens. Books? Who reads books anymore?

Well, I do. I go to the restaurant, sit with my back to the TV screen (on which CNN is dispensing repetitive propaganda), have a quiet meal alone, and read my book. But I'm a bit unusual.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 31 Jan 16 - 11:27 AM

You can save yourself the trouble now, Rap. Librarians don't Shoosh! any more. Libraries are getting to be noisy places. No smoking, but patrons are allowed to bring in food. Quiet areas are designated.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Jan 16 - 10:50 PM

I am the real Rapparee. I say that in all humilty, as I don't know where the other one came from. I'm just a retired librarian living in Idaho, someone who has had some health issues lately that don't seem to be going away any time soon.

The last time I was filled with braggadocio was years ago in college when I was reading a part from Shakespeare -- Mercutio, I think it was, from Romeo and Juliet -- in a class more than a half a century ago.

Like every male librarian, current or past, I'm a gray sort of guy who wear wire rimmed glasses with thick lenses down on my nose. I used to shoosh people a lot but recently I find myself too out of breath to shoosh well. But then I'm out of shooshing practice and getting older and older. Yes, I'm all bent over and walk with a cane and shuffling steps which wear out my carpet slippers too fast.

But I'm the real Rapparee.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Jan 16 - 02:16 AM

I suggest that you make up a credible and viable alternative to the Democrats and the Republicans. :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 30 Jan 16 - 01:02 AM

I used to make up a man named Rapparree, whose bloviation and braggadocio were fine tuned to entertain me to the sturdy rhythm of his left-handed chest pounding.

But I outgrew the habit and stopped making him up, and have heard nothing of or from him since.

I am open to suggestions as to whom I might mock up next, but make them at least interesting. No chimps or chumps need apply.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 11:31 PM

an awful mess    

      _=_ 
    q(-_-)p 
    '_) (_` 
    /__/ \ 
  _(<_ / )_ 
(__\_\_|_/__)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 10:51 PM

In impressionist cat? Surely not Dr. Schrodinger's animal?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,heedlessness
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 06:48 PM

_=_
   q(-_-)p
   '_) (_`
    /__/ \
   _(<_ / )_
(__\_\_|_/__)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 06:44 PM

That would suck. She has enough to deal with. Everything from monkeys to self-appointed deities to backwoods trash to... leave her alone! She's in her Autumnal Equinogs. Let her sip the last of the very solace she has earned before she fades into the abyss as we all must do.

Or, we could just keep shooting the shit until we go tits up. Whatever.

Hey... you gonna finish that? I'll take it. I ain't proud.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 04:10 PM

Being eternal, I am immortal. I am, at the same time and space, mortal. I am anchored in the "past" and the "future" by the chain known as the "present."

I do not expect y'all to understand this stuff, because if you did your head would explode and make an awful mess for Mom to clean up.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 03:40 PM

Who?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 12:17 PM

Are you talking to your mortal self again, Rap? A bit of a disappointment, isn't he? :)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 09:53 AM

I also created YOU. And I can uncreate you. That being the case it behooves you to acknowledge me as you creator.

And when you complain to me of cataracts, zits, boils on your saddle-sitter, no money, a busted truck, or anything else -- only I am perfect. And I achieved perfection the hard way! All I am doing is allowing you to try (and fail) to achieve the perfection I have.

Besides, if I'd created you perfect I would have created myself again. Granted, I'd have someone with whom to hold an intelligent conversation, but I can talk with myself now.

Just remember your mottos: Ad astra per asparagus! Corripe Cervisiam! Non Gradus Anus Rodentum! Vescere bracis meis! Malo mala mali quam mala equui! Cogito Ergo Doleo! Utinam barbari alum tuum invadant! Sed semper ubi sububi in caput meum! Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem!

Remember them and they will see you through.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 07:00 AM

WANTED : Schrödinger's cat. Dead and alive. (AU)

Rap created Amos > Amos exists.

Incognito, ergo sumwhat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 29 Jan 16 - 12:31 AM

Right....


(the sound of my footsteps walking away, accompanied by my wry chuckling)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 08:43 PM

Amos, Amos, Amos. I have told you repeatedly that I created you. Just because I don't require adoration and thanks, to say nothing of sacrifices, does not give you liberty to claim you created me. I have been, am, and always will be, per omnia saecula saecularum.

You, on the other hand, do not exist when I do not think of you. I know this because I spent several hours today not thinking about you and you didn't exist: QED. Or, more formally:

I have no recollection of nonexistence.
No nonexistence means I have always existed.
∴ I am eternal.

I am eternal.
You came to my attention only a few years ago.
∴ You are not eternal.

You are not eternal.
I am eternal.
∴ You are my creation.

As I said earlier, I am benevolent and require no thanks, no adoration, no sacrifices -- only your acknowledgement of my eternity and that you are my creation.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 06:36 PM

Yeah, right. I post the weather forecast and pretty much gloat about the unreal beautiful weather for this time of year and a few hours later the fuckers issue a weather alert with... snow and we don't know how much yet but it'll be enough to piss you off at the minimum. Me and my big mouth.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 05:32 PM

I never thought I'd see three figments of perfervid imagining planning hits on each other--Chongo, Chinga and Rapparree. I get nervous when my voluntary mental mockups start taking independent action. It makes me feel like I have to write it all down!l


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 03:17 PM

If he doubles it so will I. But that's for others -- for dear Chongx I'll arrange the cannon salute for free. I figure I'll be able to deduct the expense as a service to the public good.

Wait! Good news! Chinga just called and said she'll cover the cost!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 12:14 PM

Ha! Ha! Ha! I love these fine examples of capitalist energy and initiative. I'm going to advise Chongo to double his going rate.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 11:27 AM

The first truly viable and beneficial plan from Rapparee that I have heard yet!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 09:53 AM

I'll play reveille for him! For an additional $10 I'll even have the morning cannon salute fired into his living abode, complete with high-explosive round from a 175mm howitzer!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Jan 16 - 01:03 AM

Chongo's had a brilliant scam going like that for years. For $10 a day, he'll pretend to give a damn about your problems in life. For $20 a day, he won't.

And that's how the rent gets paid! :) Private eye work is pretty marginal most of the time, specially for Chimps. The average American won't hire a Chimp, because of specism.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 16 - 10:30 PM

Now that I have a genuine bugle, I'm going to go into business!

For USD 2.50 per day, I'll call you up a play reveille.

For USD 5.00 per day, I won't do that.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 16 - 09:18 PM

Floaters are a normal thing as far as I'm concerned. I probably always have a few of them happening, but they're subtle and not too distracting and I just don't notice them most of the time. If I relax and look for them...well, there they are, moving around, and they come and go.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 Jan 16 - 08:55 PM

The Over the Hill Gang has quite a medical history in this thread! If your doctors need to know something you can simply refer them to it - and see how long it takes to read nearly 54,000 (we'd have more if not for that glitch last year).

I had a floater a couple of years ago, quite a distraction. That's when I started going to an ophthalmologist instead of optometrist for my annual eye exam. Most of it has shrunk and it's a tiny little speck compared to before. Too soon for cataract surgery, though it's in my future. . .


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 16 - 07:24 PM

Well, my vision without the "pin hole device" (with which I scored 20/30 a week ago) was 20/40 without it today (it was 20/80 last week). I go back on the 4th and at that time I'll probably be given a new prescription for my right lens, "a mild one."

Goody. Now I have to see a hand surgeon about my left hand -- I've been getting "trigger finger" of the ring finger and it messes up my lute playing something awful.

I'm looking forward to that time in Hawaii as a break from doctors and chirurgeons.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Jan 16 - 12:56 PM

That is a wonderful little story, Rapparee!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 16 - 10:00 AM

Off in a distant galaxy, planetary explorers discovered a gigantic creature. All tests showed that it was alive, but it never moved. Never stood up (it was certainly sitting), never scratched, nothing. Yet it showed respiration and neural testing demonstrated that it was almost certainly both sentient and intelligent. After many years, one scientist after another became frustrated with the project and left to study other things.

Then one day one scientist slammed his hat to the ground and shouted, "Why would Nature create a creature that did nothing except sit motionlessly? Why?"

And for the first time the creature moved. It raised itself to its full height of 37 meters and in a deep voice said, "Nature wouldn't!" and sat back down.

"My GOD!!" said the scientist. "Of course! It only stands to reason!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 Jan 16 - 01:20 AM

I didn't say I was imperfect; merely that I am out of umbrage. THat is actually to be expected by anyone familiar with human nature.m The closer to perfection, the more umbrage others will take. It stands to reason that the most perfect will run out sooner than their more flawed, but inoffensive, brethren.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 07:51 PM

Oops... Mum is blind in the right eye from wet macular degeneration. Makes it a bit more meaningful.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 07:33 PM

Amos...you mean...you're not perfect???

My world is shattered. Shattered, I tell you!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 07:23 PM

Been there, done that; my eyes have been fine without glasses for some years no.

Rapp, YOU are the one who said " Because in about 20 minutes he's having cataract surgery...done by the same doctor who did mine...at the same surgery center...on the same (right) eye.". So if Sam The Terribly rightening is going to take umbrage, let him take yours as the responsible party. I have none left to spare, so many have taken it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 04:52 PM

"But I am annoying my wife by reading street signs at a distance I couldn't read before."

Hahahahaa! Same thing here. Only problem is, I pointed such out to Mum and she is near blind in the left eye from a cataract left unattended for years (long story) so I gave that up after talking about it twice in less than a minute. My bad.

But, it is freaky when you can read a sign on a building from a distance when you previously couldn't "make out" the building from a third of the distance away!

Do you have reduced peripheral vision... circular "darkness" at the side (sides for me)?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 04:33 PM

'Sokay. I see the doc tomorrow. I had no floaters for about a week, but I'm noticing them now. No flashes of light, no descending "veil", no bleeding, no infection, no fun at all. But I am annoying my wife by reading street signs at a distance I couldn't read before.

Be careful, Amos. Sam owns property in San Diego. Also Belgrade, MT, southern UT, and NC. Here's a neat fact about Sam: his daughter is a West Point graduate (retired as a colonel just recently) and his granddaughter is plebe at the Point. Sam was a contract employee with the 2nd Special Forces back in '62 and his wife had to sew all of his buttons back -- he was so proud that his granddaughter was also going the Point that he busted 'em all off.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 01:27 PM

"... I'm seeing more floaters than right after the surgery..."

Gee. My written instructions said that I should call in immediately if that happened (plus light flashes and some other stuff). Odd that there is such a difference.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 12:18 PM

Yes, sharing is a horribly unAmerican idea! It smacks of socialism!!! Better that everyone should hunker down in his own fortified bunker with a good supply of ammo, I say, and keep himself company by reading old Ayn Rand books and sharpening his Bowie knife for a last stand if the ammo runs out. Better to die stupid than to live under collective social action!!!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 10:56 AM

You and Sam been sharing an eyeball? That's pretty radical. Sounds like communism to me! What if you don't see eye to eye?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 09:44 AM

gnu, here's one for ya: my friend Sam's gun store is closed today. Why? Because in about 20 minutes he's having cataract surgery...done by the same doctor who did mine...at the same surgery center...on the same (right) eye. And yes, there are other docs in town who'll slice yer eyeball.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 09:30 AM

It's pretty cool to "scratch" around your eye by putting your finger through an empty hole where your right lens used to be. It's subtle and can make people go "YUCK!"

The black eye is fading faster with the use of arnica cream. My vision is okay, although I'm seeing more floaters than right after the surgery; that's probably because of the ocular anesthesia wearing off.

I'll know more tomorrow after I see the eye doc for the week-after followup exam.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 26 Jan 16 - 07:15 AM

Rap... how's dee eye, b'y?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jan 16 - 09:56 PM

Amos, no place in the US is immune to earthquakes. Now, where I live we only have to worry about tornadoes, blizzards, earthquakes, and volcanoes. Tsunamis and hurricanes, no, they're off the list. In fact, we don't even have a tsunami escape route. If the volcano over in Yellowstone blows, well, I'll be joining all of MOABites (including you, eventually).

LH, Shame couldn't drink a stubby s without tossing it back up. Heck, I know for a fact he can't drink a half bottle of Labatt Dealcoholized. Ya see, he's allergic to beer and all malt beverages. Comes from dumpster diving for dregs of Bud Light.


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