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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Amos 13 Aug 09 - 01:55 PM
Little Hawk 13 Aug 09 - 01:44 PM
Amos 13 Aug 09 - 11:34 AM
Amos 13 Aug 09 - 10:15 AM
Rapparee 13 Aug 09 - 09:07 AM
gnu 13 Aug 09 - 05:47 AM
Little Hawk 13 Aug 09 - 03:30 AM
Amos 13 Aug 09 - 01:41 AM
Amos 13 Aug 09 - 01:40 AM
Acme 13 Aug 09 - 12:27 AM
Little Hawk 12 Aug 09 - 11:25 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 10:47 PM
Rapparee 12 Aug 09 - 10:01 PM
Little Hawk 12 Aug 09 - 09:01 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 08:58 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 07:55 PM
Rapparee 12 Aug 09 - 06:47 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 05:35 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Aug 09 - 05:08 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 02:31 PM
gnu 12 Aug 09 - 01:46 PM
Acme 12 Aug 09 - 01:37 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 12:53 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Aug 09 - 12:39 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 12:35 PM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 11:58 AM
gnu 12 Aug 09 - 09:25 AM
Rapparee 12 Aug 09 - 09:10 AM
Amos 12 Aug 09 - 01:23 AM
Rapparee 12 Aug 09 - 01:00 AM
Janie 12 Aug 09 - 12:17 AM
Amos 11 Aug 09 - 11:55 PM
Acme 11 Aug 09 - 11:25 PM
Rapparee 11 Aug 09 - 10:59 PM
Amos 11 Aug 09 - 10:42 PM
Janie 11 Aug 09 - 10:33 PM
Janie 11 Aug 09 - 09:26 PM
Janie 11 Aug 09 - 06:11 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 11 Aug 09 - 05:59 PM
Amos 11 Aug 09 - 05:57 PM
Rapparee 11 Aug 09 - 05:52 PM
GUEST,Chongo Chimp 11 Aug 09 - 04:57 PM
Amos 11 Aug 09 - 03:06 PM
Acme 11 Aug 09 - 12:26 PM
Amos 11 Aug 09 - 12:15 PM
Amos 11 Aug 09 - 12:05 PM
Rapparee 11 Aug 09 - 09:21 AM
Acme 11 Aug 09 - 12:38 AM
Janie 10 Aug 09 - 11:55 PM
Janie 10 Aug 09 - 11:53 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 01:55 PM

It's all in the formatting, LH:

Little Hawk is being an obstreperous and obnoxious nerd.
into Japanese

リトルホークは、騒々しいとされて嫌なおたく。
back into English

Little Hawk is a bad blatancy geek and the new.

back into Japanese
リトルホーク悪い騒々オタクと新しいです。
back into English

Little Hawk is a new noise and bad nerds.

back into Japanese
リトルホークの新しいノイズと悪いオタクです。
back into English

Geek is the new noise and poor Little Hawk.

back into Japanese
オタクは、新しい騒音や貧しいリトルホークです。
back into English

Geek is the new noise and poor Little Hawk.



See what I mean?


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 01:44 PM

let's go!

Amos's usefullness is in inverse proportion to the amount of talking he does.into Japanese?A???X?usefullness"??b???""??????Bback into EnglishUsefullness of Amos He is inversely proportional to the amount of the story.back into JapaneseUsefullness?A???X?"??t??b???"?????Bback into EnglishHis Usefullness Amos is proportional to the amount of the story in reverse.back into Japanese?A???XUsefullness?t?"??b???"?????Bback into EnglishAmos Usefullness proportional to the amount of his story in reverse.back into Japanese?A???XUsefullness?t?"??b???"?????Bback into EnglishAmos Usefullness proportional to the amount of his story in reverse.

Hmm. Kind of hard to read, isn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 11:34 AM

♫ ♫
Atheist, Baptist or Dago
Don't get to ride in my Winnebago,
When we all get called up to Beyond!       ♫
Perihelion, doom or Rapture
My RV you'll never capture,
In my captain's chair as I roll on.
            ♫
Pearly Gates don't allow no snarking,
They've got lots of outsize parking
For when we all get called, up to Beyond!
Got TV, I won't get snotty,
Eight-track tapes and a porta-potty
It will be a breeze when I move on!

Call me when you need me, Jesus
Call me when the whole world freezes
In my Winnebago, I'll be there!
Sound the trump, and blow the chofer                ♫
Give me a sec to start my motor!
My RV and me are moving on!! ♫ ♫      ♫


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 10:15 AM

Silver glittering, towering Yukari Akira, Wings, his empire, to be built on the pattern of clouds, the length of the grass field next to the redemption of a city break over the green plateau unmatched chord no stretch of the attack.

Tell ya what: http://translationparty.com. Do your own bizarre work.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 09:07 AM

I knew a banjo player who "beat out chords of redemption". Didn't work well; they still hung him in his own strings "just because."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 05:47 AM

Shrooms?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 03:30 AM

Cosmic! ;-)

Try this:

Floating upon clouds of shimmering silver, the purple dragon soars, his wings beating out chords of matchless redemption over fields of uncut grass that stretch unbroken to the blue highlands which lie far beyond the imperial city.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 01:41 AM

I like this way-point:

Black, Silver Black Madonna of the evil dwarf FURANNERUFANTAMU cry cause breadcrum BAIKUJIPUSHIKUIN scattered like birds of prey like the innocence of a bike and choose the Eden Gates.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 01:40 AM

Well, it goes round and round, and chokes when it gets to about here:

"Black, EDENGEITSU bike SHIRUBABURAKKUMADONNA BAIKUJIPUSHIKUIN FURANNERUFANTAMU simple: as the cause of scattering is bad, please select the dwarf birds feed please breadcrum".

Then it reports the phrase will probably not ever reach equilibrium.

Can't figger why, though!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 13 Aug 09 - 12:27 AM

Whoosh!

I think a loop just few past. Is Gluon out in the yard playing with the time space continuum again?

I thought so.

Gluon! Drop it! Put that down. Now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 11:25 PM

Try out the English-Japanese thing on this a few times:

The motorcycle black Madonna two-wheeled gypsy queen
And her silver-studded phantom cause the grey flannel dwarf to scream
As he weeps to wicked birds of prey who pick up on his breadcrum sins
And there are no sins inside the Gates of Eden


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 10:47 PM

Stealing from every other, he imagines himself the creator of all.

into Japanese他からの窃盗、彼自身のすべての創作想像。
back into English

Stealing from others, all of his creative imagination.

back into Japanese他人からの窃盗は、すべて彼の創造的な想像力。
back into English

Stealing from others is his creative imagination.

back into Japanese他人からの窃盗彼の創造的な想像力です。
back into English

It is his imagination and creativity of stealing from others.

back into Japaneseそれは彼の想像力と創造力を盗んだとして他人からされています。
back into English

It is stealing from others as his imagination and creativity.

back into Japaneseそれは彼の想像力と創造力を盗んだとして他人からされています。
back into English

It is stealing from others as his imagination and creativity.

Thus equilibrium!!

(I am sorry. I got carried away. I will desist....).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 10:01 PM

So would I. So, LH...ya wanna not...you know...get together?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 09:01 PM

"I knew you could get it up, Rapaire. Even when Little Hawk said no."

Actually, Rapaire has never propositioned me in that fashion.

But if he did...I would most certainly say "no".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 08:58 PM

Imaginary playmates replace harsh reality in his fevered thought processes.

Imaginary playmate, please replace the hard reality in a desperate thought processes.

Fictitious play, please replace the harsh reality of the thought processes of their lives.

Fictitious play, please replace the harsh reality of life in the process of thought.

And fictitious play in the process of thinking, please replace the harsh reality of life.

In the process of thinking, imaginary play, please replace the harsh reality of life.

Please replace the harsh realities of life, and imaginative play in the process of thought.

Below, in the process of thinking, please replace the harsh reality of life and imaginative play.

In the following, in the process of thinking, please replace the harsh reality of life and imaginative play.

In the following, in the process of thinking, please replace the harsh reality of life and imaginative play.

Thus, equilibrium has been attained!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 07:55 PM

I knew you could get it up, Rapaire. Even when Little Hawk said no.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 06:47 PM

I've said the same thing, Amos, while I rode the elevator.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 05:35 PM

Wow, Bruce, you are in high spiritual gear, so to speak!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 05:08 PM

♫♫
In Heaven, there will be no Winnebagos
There may be canteloupes and sweet potatoes
And fried catfish with okra and tomatoes
And ice cream with strawberry rhubarb pie

There may be leaves a rustlin' as the wind blows
And wiggle worms a wigglin' as the grass grows
And little fishies swimmin' as the creek flows
But there'll be no Winnebagos in the sky

In the sky, yes in the sky
There'll be no Winnebagos in the sky
Just come right in if you've a mind
But leave that motorhome behind
There'll be no Winnebagos in the sky
♫♫


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 02:31 PM

Not more than before, anyway.

"So far,so good," as the man passing the 12th story window said .


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 01:46 PM

Amos... "not particularly" being apt?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 01:37 PM

You all understood what I was saying despite my typo ("bet" came out "be" and isn't noticed by a spell-check because they don't give a rats ass about syntax) but I do wish we could correct our posts, for that very reason.

I wouldn't put all of that stuff in my Winnebago. I'd start with a copy of Travels With Charley (remember how overloaded his pickup and camper was? It was all of the books.)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 12:53 PM

That's very ...er... spiritual, BWL!!



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 12:39 PM

♫♫
I'm goin' off to Heaven in my trusty Winnebago
An' I'm takin' seven geetars, two banjoes, an' a Dobro
My rifle an' my shotgun an' a dozen fishin' poles
If I can't take my shit with me, I ain't a gonna go.
♫♫


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 12:35 PM

And I am not particularly splenetic, choleric, cranky, cross, excitable, hot-tempered,   impulsive, inflammable, irascible, irritable, passionate, peppery, petulant, quarrelsome, over-sensitive, short-tempered, shrewish, temperamental, testy, or waspish
as a result.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 11:58 AM

Fifteen days, two hours and fifty-eight minutes. THis is really going quite well, considering.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 09:25 AM

Janie... like, coool!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 09:10 AM

The beauty, Amos, of being a librarian is that you leave behind you work that survives for a century or more, sometimes much, much more. You touch lives that touch other lives.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 01:23 AM

The ripples I have the most delight in leaving behind are the ones which reflect the generations before me to the ones after me. These are captured in the moments when a song suddenly blooms in your brain like a hologram leaping out of its own time and into yours. It's a reason for singing--to refresh the species-song, and the race-memories, which remind us of who we are (as we have always been) regardless of the flux of circumstance, population, technology and which corner of the pool we happen to be swimming in.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 01:00 AM

I was confronted with my mortality on about April 14, 1968. I went out and bought a Buck "General" as a result.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 12 Aug 09 - 12:17 AM

I've noticed, Maggie. It gives one pause.   

Some of us are old, and most of us are not spring chickens. We are confronted with the mortality of our corporeal presence, on the one hand, and blessed with the reminder of how we are immortal, though perhaps forgotten as individuals in a generation or two.   As we recognize how others live on in our memories and in their individual and cultural influences, and the music of common folk is preserved and evolves, and always valued in some manner or another, so we understand that even as we pass out of memory of the generations that follow, our influence, for good or ill, will continue.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 11:55 PM

YEah, the good souls are dropping like flies. But at least the Yankees are not dropping their, like, flies.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 11:25 PM

No rapture rupture, just a burst bubble.

I'm going to say this quietly over here, not start a thread, but have you noticed a LOT of mudcatters and potential/honorary (i.e., Mike Seeger) mudcatters are passing away this summer? I'd be willing to be they're not doing it to hold a place in line for that Winnebago ride. Sad business.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 10:59 PM

Can the Rapture cause injury? A rupture, perhaps? A Rapture rupture?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 10:42 PM

Rapture points for Janie, yeah!! One hundred and eleventy-seven, at the very least!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 10:33 PM

Poor MOM, no one paying any attention to you tonight but me.

How many brownie points do I get for this post?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 09:26 PM

I raptured a hornet that appeared from out of nowhere Sunday night, whizzed around my head a few times, and then headed for the light over the sink.

What with the toad and the hornet, Sunday was critter day.

No snakes from the wilds of the Everglades, however.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 06:11 PM

According to Garrison Keller, a lot of fundamental and/or evangelical Christians are going to be really surprised when "that Great Day" arrives, and only the cars with Unitarian bumper stickers are suddenly left empty of people on the highway. The Unitarians will be pretty shocked as well. I think I quote fairly accurately ..."Raptured? The Unitarians? Unitarians don't want raptured. They want closure!"

However, I know I few that would reconsider their position if there was a nice, just-like-new Winnebago waiting for them, parked on a big, puffy cloud. Just think, one could astroplane in style and comfort!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 05:59 PM

I figure ya do. But probably not as many as ya get fer showin' up in a mint condish Duesenberg with the original paint job intact.

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 05:57 PM

Yeah...so, do you get extra points for showing up in a Winnebago? That's what I want to know.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 05:52 PM

Well, see, this here rapture thing is set for just before Aunty Christ arrives. Or maybe during Aunty's visit. Or maybe after. Ain't nobody quite sure exactly when it's gonna happen. But when it does it's gonna be some Serious Shit. Graves are gonna yawn and the dead will arise, those that are goin' on to glory. I don't know what happens to the rest. Just continue laying there, I guess. Best read I've read on it is "Job: A Comedy Of Justice" by Robert A. Heinlein.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 04:57 PM

Yeah, but us recalcitrant sinners like me and Amos won't be there to see it, will we? ;-D Seems like kind of a shame. I'd consider reformin' so as to share in the spoils after the Rapture comes down and the Shit hits the Big Fan, but that would mean givin' up booze, cigars, fast women, and questionably gratuitous acts of violence. It would also mean forgivin' all my enemies and turnin' the other cheek to them. It would mean givin' the other guy my vest, coat, hat, and shoes when he asks me fer my shirt.

No fun at all, in other words.

So I guess we can just forget about that possibility, right?

But when is this Rapture thing s'posed to happen? I would maybe consider reformin' and gettin' "saved" in the last 24 hours just before the big hammer comes down, so as to cash in on the jackpot without givin' up too much fun in the interim...

- Chongo


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 03:06 PM

I have never been inside it, but it is well along in years and I fear it might suffer from mildew or other symptoms of mortality. Come the Rapture, of course, all that will be swept away and a bright new spiritual Winnebago revealed in its stead, the hidden true soul of the thing.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 12:26 PM

Amos, you should offer to give his vehicle an occasional test drive, just as a neighborly service. Take it for a couple of days workout at a time, to be sure you've given it a good checkout. It's the least you can do.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 12:15 PM

Into darkness then did descend the spirit of God,
Upon the watery chaos, whereon he made his abode.
Which darkness then was on the face of the deep,
In which rested the Chaos, and in it all things asleep.

Rude, unformed, without shape, form or any good,
Out of which God created all things as it stood.
But first he commanded a light to appear,
That all might be seen, that before was hid.

And God saw that the light was good and clear,
And the darkness and light he did then divide,
Calling the one day, and the other night,
For darkness [to] obscure (and day for shining bright).

And a firmament then God did let make,
To sever the waters above from those below;
And divided the Earth from the waters also,
Wherein greatly his power he did show.

Then out of this Chaos, the four elements were made:
Heat and cold, moist and dry, in like wise,
Which are the beginning of all creatures wide,
That under the globe of Luna do abide.

The quintessence (that some men it call)
Was taken out of the Chaos before the four elements all:
Which is the first being, as we may descry,
And uncorruptible, whereof was made the sky,
And celestial bodies all, which do never die.

By the Alchemist, Simon Forman (1552-1611)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 12:05 PM

Dang, I yam jealous of Kendall.

But it is alright. There will be more parties.

If the world does not end first.

I have just learned that my very unusual elderly neighbor, who drives off to church twice a day and rarely otherwise comes out, has a secret reason for the large RV he keeps in his driveway. He is too weak to do anything recreational with it, but he keeps it and maintains it in ready condition. Turns out he figures it should be kept ready for the Rapture. I never heard of anyone wanting to be Raptured in an RV before, but I guess creature comforts might be useful on a long trip like that. I can't imagine how he thinks the voyage will end, though...

I swear I am not making this up.



A



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 09:21 AM

The sort of whiny sound of the dobro kinda fits Bee-Dubya and others who spent so much time with pot. I only hope that he gets help soon and doesn't kiln himself.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Aug 09 - 12:38 AM

I love that kind of get together, Janie, where there is good food and everyone yaks their heads off. :) We do those here every so often.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 11:55 PM

Hurray Indiana and Illinois! In spite of the high unemployment rate, the good denizens apparently bought enough pots for BWL to buy his dobro.

Good on you, BWL!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 10 Aug 09 - 11:53 PM

Aww, MOM, I am absolutely replete with good food and good company. Dani, Elena, Holly, Kendall and a friend of mine from work, Greg, just left.

If I do say so myself, the meal I fixed was on par with the fine company. We drank a champagne toast to the nomination of the Utah Phillips tribute CD for a Grammy, yakked our heads off, filled our bellies with good food and good wine, and our hearts and minds with good conversation and good company.

Kendall appreciates Maine much more, having come to NC for the first real southern heat spell we have had this year. (He arrived with a lush beard, which is now gone after a day or so in this heat. Hope Jacqui forgives him.)


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