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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

gnu 09 Feb 17 - 07:29 PM
Amos 09 Feb 17 - 11:21 PM
Rapparee 10 Feb 17 - 10:15 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 10 Feb 17 - 01:27 PM
Amos 10 Feb 17 - 08:07 PM
keberoxu 11 Feb 17 - 05:39 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 11 Feb 17 - 07:08 PM
Amos 11 Feb 17 - 09:28 PM
Acme 11 Feb 17 - 09:40 PM
Rapparee 11 Feb 17 - 09:57 PM
Amos 12 Feb 17 - 10:24 AM
Acme 12 Feb 17 - 11:24 AM
keberoxu 12 Feb 17 - 01:02 PM
Rapparee 12 Feb 17 - 01:26 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Feb 17 - 10:28 PM
Rapparee 13 Feb 17 - 09:41 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 Feb 17 - 10:11 PM
Acme 14 Feb 17 - 12:01 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Feb 17 - 05:16 AM
Rapparee 14 Feb 17 - 01:31 PM
gnu 14 Feb 17 - 02:22 PM
gnu 14 Feb 17 - 06:07 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 14 Feb 17 - 08:09 PM
Amos 14 Feb 17 - 10:46 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 15 Feb 17 - 07:21 PM
Amos 15 Feb 17 - 08:01 PM
Acme 15 Feb 17 - 08:41 PM
Rapparee 15 Feb 17 - 09:52 PM
keberoxu 16 Feb 17 - 03:14 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 16 Feb 17 - 04:02 PM
Amos 16 Feb 17 - 10:37 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 17 Feb 17 - 03:29 PM
Rapparee 17 Feb 17 - 09:44 PM
gnu 18 Feb 17 - 05:17 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 18 Feb 17 - 08:28 AM
Amos 19 Feb 17 - 08:35 AM
keberoxu 19 Feb 17 - 01:49 PM
Amos 19 Feb 17 - 05:16 PM
Rapparee 19 Feb 17 - 09:32 PM
Rapparee 20 Feb 17 - 10:01 AM
gnu 20 Feb 17 - 12:42 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 20 Feb 17 - 01:49 PM
gnu 20 Feb 17 - 04:14 PM
Rapparee 20 Feb 17 - 05:41 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 20 Feb 17 - 06:08 PM
Amos 20 Feb 17 - 07:47 PM
MMario 21 Feb 17 - 08:36 AM
Rapparee 21 Feb 17 - 09:12 AM
Amos 21 Feb 17 - 05:47 PM
Rapparee 21 Feb 17 - 07:04 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 09 Feb 17 - 07:29 PM

I sit and I wait.
And I anticipate.
The snow we deserve
After the fate the fate endured
With that fuckin freezing rain
What a fucking pain
In the arse

She's gonna go Nor'easter ona night eh? Wee touch of the pure driven and a touch of yer wind. No worries. Not like it's gonna be 1992 again, or worse, what I survived as this post proves. Bout time. At there rain shite we had back in January month is nasty stuff. Some up north had their power out for two weeks last go. I had er out for four days and that was all I wanted ta suffer right? Small potatoes for me says I. So... let it snow. Besides, it'll be good for the partridge. Poor little buggers musta been droppin like flies with the freeze/thaw/rain/freeze. Well, drop? More like smother or starve to death in their burrows. On the other hand, the deer are lovin the lack of snow. Coyotes are showing up with mange on accounta they can't just eat all the deer they wanna eat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 09 Feb 17 - 11:21 PM

We've had wicked, wintry winds coming down the valley, thunder rolling down the hills and heavy rains before dawn. Not too bad. In a couple of days it'll be back in the 60-70F range. There will, however, be one more mean freeze before SPring asserts her golden self. Buty Spring here in the South last three or four months, I am told, so it's well worth the wait.

The shake=down here at 212 continues apace and the place looks a little more homelike every day. Dani came over and blessed our progress, so good on us. :D

Hugs, Mom. Don't buy any wooden emperors!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Feb 17 - 10:15 AM

212, eh? I thought you'd have switched to metric by now. But then, I understand that back in your day you and ol' Daniel Gabriel Fahrenheit used to go out "freezing water" and "bringing things to a boil." Of course, ol' Danny Boy never married and was "associated" with people like Olaus Roemer and Pieter van Musschenbroek. I'm sure you wouldn't have had anything at all to do with Danny Boy's "experiments" in "shades of heat" (did someone say, "50"?).

Then there's Pete. He is said to have invented the capacitor as the "Leyden (pronounced 'LAY den', emphasis in the original) jar" and "machines" for "testing" tension, compression, and flexure. One of his more, well, arousing (to Danny Boy and Pete anyway) examples was a problem in "dynamic plasticity" dealing with the penetration of butter by a wooden stick subjected to impact by a wooden sphere.

There's a picture of Pete here, and one of his partner, Danny Boy, here. Not being given to making assertions without proof, I shall only mention that they inveigled young Andy Celsius into the claws and maws of their so-called "temperature research" (or "temperatuur onderzoek" as they called it).


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 10 Feb 17 - 01:27 PM

There's a house in one of the older sections of Pensacola whose address is 222 Spring Street. For years, it was the semi-communal domicile of a number of musicians. (Think the Grateful Dead's house in Haight-Ashbury.) It was so well known that everyone just called it Two-Two-Two. No need for a street name or any further explication. Everyone knew what you were talking about.

Perhaps Amos's new old house will achieve a similarly near-legendary stature in Hillsborough. "Big jam at Two-Twelve tonight! Be there!"


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 10 Feb 17 - 08:07 PM

That is definitely the plan. When the enviable SPring finally appears we shall birst forth in gloriousd acoustic merriment. Mwahahaha. No more Wagon Wheel for me.

I have a banjo and I know how to use it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 05:39 PM

Rapparee is busy observing his birthday.
So I'll hoist MOM for now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 07:08 PM

That makes three threads in which mention of Rapparee's birthday has been made. Ignoring it is becoming quite difficult, but I shall persist in doing so.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 09:28 PM

I will be by your side, adding my vehement ignoral to yours is fraternal solidarity!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 09:40 PM

Hey, MOM,

You didn't use Rap's birthdate for your computer passwords, did you?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 09:57 PM

Possibly she did, because I'm her favorite.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 10:24 AM

Like Trump is America's favorite. A convenient fiction to assuage narcissism. A solipsistic sop, a teething ring of distraught confusion of the soul.

Yesterday's March on Raleigh was very stirring and u[plifting--there were, I think, easily twenty thousand of us in full agreement that the loofa-faced twitter-bird should take his shit-gibbon hijinks elsewhere. Ca;;s for reform of every kind--above all the removal of HB2--rang out and we marched through the center of Raleigh. Janey put up some good picturers on Facebook. There's ever a news clip video with me strolling past the camera. Fame at last!

But anyway, it was a real deal hoot of an event. Plenty of peace to go around.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 11:24 AM

Good news you're throwing yourself into regional events, Amos. Have you set the house up completely, every box unpacked and corrugated responsibly recycled, or is marching a way to remove yourself from the sea of boxes throughout the house, contents now unknown?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 01:02 PM

Amos, do keep an eye on that bamboo grove. Rooted bamboo is a force to be reckoned with. The permanent deacon at my former parish told me a bamboo story. When he originally installed bamboo in his yard, he did so by burying a metal garbage can, open end up, with the bamboo coming up inside.

A long while later, with the bamboo fully grown and extending itself towards pastures new, the deacon got out the shovel and had a look at what was left of the installation below the topsoil.
He found that the growing, thriving bamboo had expanded so as to TEAR the metal can into shreds and pieces over time underground.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 01:26 PM

Amos, don't try to bamboozle bamboo. Bamboozling bamboo breaks Bambi's bravado.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 10:28 PM

There are many types of bamboo. Some are quite civilized. Others spread like kudzu, only taller.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 09:41 AM

Bamboo.

Bamboo.

Bamboo.

Bamboo.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 10:11 PM

Hi, Mom. For dinner tonight, we had a rotisserie chicken from the supermarket. You know how they're labeled "Lemon Pepper" or "Mojo" or some such? Well, this one was labeled "Mardi Gras". When I took it out of its package, it drank a beer, took off its bra, and shook its breasts at me.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 12:01 AM

Just so it didn't swat you across the face with a string of metallic plastic beads.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 05:16 AM

Yeah, I was a bit concerned that a Mardi Gras chicken might taste like cheap plastic beads, but it didn't. It tasted like Moon Pie.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 01:31 PM

Moon Pie is good. Lone Star is good. Grits are good. PBR is good. Shrimp are good. Alligator is good. Crawdads are good. Cypress is good. Beignets are good. Catfish is good. Hushpuppies are good. Collards are good. Pot liquor is good. Poutine is not good. Chicken fried steak is good. Biscuits are good. Molasses is good. Sweet taters are good. Barbecued ribs are good. Black-eyed peas are good. Okra is good. Red-eye gravy is good. Hoppin' John is good. Turnip greens are good.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 02:22 PM

Like Moon Pie? Ewwwwwwwwww!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 06:07 PM

Snowed Thursday and Monday (16"+ on Monday). Gonna snow Thursday. Fuck off Old Man Winter ya fuckin prick! Jesus H. Christ what is yer fuckin problem ya cranky old fuck? You think this is fun for and elderly man with arthritis? Screw you!!! Tried out my video cam. Figured our how to download to YT... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KebFH2ce4dk&feature=youtu.be


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 08:09 PM

Rap, everything in Louisiana is good. Except the cops in New Orleans. And the so-called health professionals in New Orleans. And the politicians in New Orleans (plus about half the politicians in the rest of the state). Put 'em all together, and they're worth about half as much as a bowl of red beans and rice from a greasy diner on Magazine Street.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 10:46 PM

Out here in NAWTH Carolina, it's all good! The weather bounces between 80F and 50F, and the winds slip from five to twenty knots. The days slip from sunny and bright to windy and gray as Spring sneaks in and Winter fights back. The people just line up and cheer on the sidelines.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 07:21 PM

To the tune of "I Love Paris"

I Don't Miss Chongo

♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬

I don't miss Chongo in the springtime
I don't miss Chongo in the fall
I don't miss Chongo in the winter
I don't miss that ape at all

I don't miss Chongo in the morning
Don't miss him in the afternoon
I don't miss Chongo
Why the hell would I miss Chongo
He smells like a baboon

♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 08:01 PM

Crowd goes wild, rafters shake with the stamping of feet and the echoes of applause. Infatuated groupies carry BWL off tot heir boudoir on their naked shoulders.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 08:41 PM

MOM, we had a speck of chilly weather down here, nothing like the Gnuser up in NB, but cool enough that a fresh batch of lentil soup hit the spot. Not the icy top step on the porch, but the empty spot in my tummy.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 09:52 PM

Well, good. The piles of ice and snow have pretty much sublimed away. Next week: rain and snow. And of course flooding. Lots of snow left in the "higher elevations." I drove through an underpass which had been flooded last weekend and except for the flotsam and jetsam and tree trunks and bodies and stuff marking the high water line you could barely tell it had happened at all.

Fortunately, no water has gotten into the Alky Cellar up at the Legion Hovel.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 16 Feb 17 - 03:14 PM

I do hope Gnu is still alive after "Winter Storm Pluto."


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Feb 17 - 04:02 PM

Winter Storm Pluto, huh? Did I miss Winter Storm Goofy?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 16 Feb 17 - 10:37 PM

THere all goofy, but this one is no mini.

We are having chilly weather here in the South, too. Wearing sweaters even. Bitter winds blowing around. But the daffodils are up and trhe redbud tree is blooming; let us hope it is not misplaced vegetarian optimism.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 17 Feb 17 - 03:29 PM

Speaking of winter storms, southern California is going to drown this weekend. What's being called the biggest storm in six years is on its way there. That's what happens when Amos moves away and takes his Cosmic Weather Shield with him.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Feb 17 - 09:44 PM

Yes, Amos is a force field to be reckoned with. Or upon. If he'd been in the South between 1861 and 1865 the South might have won The War. But he wasn't and as a result the South lost.

SO IT'S ALL AMOS' FAULT!!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 05:17 AM

The Thursday storm didn't happen as forecast. Twas only suppose to really get going toward daylight and we were suppose to get 60-90 kph NE which would gradually turn NNW and subside to 40-70 KPH by early afternoon. But, no, Old Man Winter decided that would be too easy on my back so, in the middle of the night, he decided to change it to snow like a sumbitch with 50-80 N such that, when I went to clear Mum's back door, I had to shovel my way to the door through double thigh deep drifts... prick. By noon, it was 40-70 kph NNW and the storm stalled and spun until it blew itself out around 7PM. The centre of the storm at the end of it was directly across from Mum's backdoor where her driveway meets mine. The only thing that could really mess us up now is more snow soon or maybe, say, if, on the chance, the temperature rises to 5C tomorrow and we get some rain... prick.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Feb 17 - 08:28 AM

Yes, gnu, a bit of rain on top of all that snow and then a return to sub-freezing temps would turn your situation from unpleasant to truly biblical. Expect people from Hollywood to come knocking on your door offering mega-bucks for the opportunity to film it all.

Of course, they'll want to toss in a few plagues and pestilences, bring in a pharaoh or two for a bit of scourging, and have a few bushes spontaneously combust just to add a bit of context. I hope your back yard's big enough to accommodate the Red Sea so Moses can do that parting thing he does so well.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 17 - 08:35 AM

What I don't understand is why Gnu doesn't pack up his mother and leave that whole "good manners, smart president, good health care" shtick behind and move south to the land of imbecilic autocrats and overpriced pharmaceuticals and free BS. It just doesn't make sense to put up with such terrible weather every year!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: keberoxu
Date: 19 Feb 17 - 01:49 PM

Poor gnu. Thanks for letting us know that you are still alive, shoveling, and cussing.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 19 Feb 17 - 05:16 PM

Meanwhile we are rollicking on the commons in 65F sunshine today, a Sunday classic for early Spring in the middle of Febraury. Dogs are gamboling, folks chatting in their shirtsleeves, and the stately Eno rolls down to the sea under the kindly afternoon sun. Daffodills have begun flowering.

Back in California I had one rocking session a week. Last week I had the Nash St Brewery, the Thursday night jam session and tonight I am going to a bonfire old-time music jam Folks remain open and kindly and friendly in spite of my origins as a goddamned carpetbagger. They are taking their duties as citizens and as kind souls seriously.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 17 - 09:32 PM

Well, it was 48F (call it 9C) here today. Then it rained. Then it snowed. I took a nap, and when I awoke it was brilliant blue sky and today's snow had melted.

Monday 02/20 80% / 0.2 in

Showers in the morning, becoming a steady rain in the afternoon. Windy. High 43F. Winds S at 20 to 30 mph. Chance of rain 80%. Rainfall near a quarter of an inch. Winds could occasionally gust over 40 mph.
Monday Night 02/20 70% / 0.16 in

Steady light rain in the evening. Windy with showers continuing late. Low 41F. Winds S at 20 to 30 mph. Chance of rain 70%. Winds could occasionally gust over 40 mph.


On the 14th I went to a concert by the The Irish Rovers and on the 16th one by
The Bar J Wranglers.

However! I woke up on the 14th with a bad, bad pain in the inside of my left elbow. To the doctor! and was told it was probably a strain or a sprain so just rest it. Friday I went again -- it's probable that I've torn at least the bicep loose, just as I did some years back on the right arm.

On the 13th of March I'm supposed to leave for a cruise up and down the sunny coast of Norway. Fill in the blank with the expletive of your choice: Ah, ___________________________________________!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 17 - 10:01 AM

Amos, I'm afraid that I simply couldn't be rollicking on the commons. I am far too well bred and brought up for sort of thing. "Commons" indeed! Humph!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 Feb 17 - 12:42 PM

Twas a loverly day yesterday. Weather looks pretty good all week. Today, is one of those days I detest. It's a 3-piece blue pinstripe day. Vic, directly across the street from me, passed the other day so I am off anon to deliver condolences. Gonna miss our chats.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Feb 17 - 01:49 PM

Hi, Mom. Today is not Presidents' Day. It's still officially George Washington's Birthday. The name has never been officially changed to Presidents' Day, even though that's what most people call it. So, I choose to celebrate George Washington's Birthday so that I don't, by implication, celebrate the presidencies of Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush, or D****d T***p. George Washington, I have no problem with.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: gnu
Date: 20 Feb 17 - 04:14 PM

GW the I seems like he was a cool dude. I mean, the wooden teeth myth spread by Fox News back then proves he was adored, idolized, by many.

So, I went to the parlour, spotted the greeting line, shook hands with his five sons (didn't see the daughter), kneeled on the deeply padded bench, crossed myself* out of respect for Vic, said a heartfelt prayer with head bowed and eyes closed, crossed myself again, looked at Vic and said, "Thanks, Vic. Gonna miss ya, Bud." And hobbled (I shall not kneel again!) out with moist eyes.

I was home in jig time. Took me longer to get dressed than I spent in the visitation room (that happens when you ONLY EVER wear a tie to funeral parlours and funerals). Mum was at the back door checking on the mail when I got back so I went over to have a short chat. Mum asks, "Have you been there already?" "Yup." "Oh dear, I won't say what I was just going to say." "Tell me." "No, you might get upset." "Me? Upset? Huh? Tell me." "Well, you were back so quickly that I was going to ask, "Was he there?"" I roared with laughter. That's going in my short story about Vic and Bernice (Bernice died a few years back). Along with the mustard pickles, mason jars, cookies, tomatos, and others. I will miss them both now.

* Cat'lics have Dog on speed-dial.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Feb 17 - 05:41 PM

You did your good, gnu. They're probably up there on some cloud, looking down on you, and laughing their asses off to see you making nice in a suit. Me, I wore a blazer and slacks and shirt and tie for my sister's funeral back in December. I think I have a suit, too.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Feb 17 - 06:08 PM

I bought a suit for my sister-in-law's funeral about fifteen years ago. Went to wear it to something else a few years later, and moths had eaten holes in it. $500 and wore it once. If I'd bought a banjo instead, I'd still have it and it wouldn't have made a bit of difference to sis-in-law either way.

Since then, it's been sport coat, slacks, and tie. If that ain't good enough for some, screw 'em. At least I'm wearing clothes.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 20 Feb 17 - 07:47 PM

I like your Mom, Gnuzer! My kind of one-liner!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 21 Feb 17 - 08:36 AM

Hey Mom! Tell Bee-dubya-ell that 2/17 was LINCOLN'S birthday, not G. Washington's.

2/22 is Washington's Birthday, or as it was known in our house "Dad's Birthday" -

Wednesday would have been Dad's hundreth. He missed it by less then 2 years.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 17 - 09:12 AM

George Washington was born February 11, 1732 (OS) and hence shares a birthday with Thomas Edison and me. Abraham Lincoln was actually born February 11, but his father's watch was fast -- he actually shares a birthday with George, Tom, and me. And to give divine approval to us, Bernadette Soubirous first saw "the Lady" at Lourdes on February 11, 1858. Back in my days in Catholic elementary school it was also the feast of St. Adolf of Osnabruck (it still is) and the patron of the pastor, so we got the day off from school. I, in my humble way, always told those who didn't know why we didn't have to go to school that it was because that's how the Catholic Church celebrated my birthday.

Historically, the Magna Carta, Virginia Declaration of the Rights of Man, Declaration of Independence, and the US Constitution was all signed on February 11, but their effective dates were changed to what we know them as now.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 21 Feb 17 - 05:47 PM

Back when I would rant at Bearded Bruce about how delusory and self-centered W was, I had no idea it could get so very much worse!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 17 - 07:04 PM

Washington, DC, a/k/a Fantasyland on the Potomac.


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